The (un)Life and Times Of Specter Shift

Specter was suddenly overcome with the notion, as he examined his handiwork, that his ability to converse with the dead was somehow rather ironic right now.

Rather than dwell on the notion he decided to let his handiwork speak for itself, hopefully all too literally.

"S-Specter?"

"Hey, Twilight!" He chirped cheerfully, failing to hide his bubbling excitement, not that he was trying all too hard.

'Success! I'm entirely certain she doesn't even have any brain damage!"

"Oh, Specter, I'm so glad to see you!"

'Scratch that. I'm now only reasonably sure.'

"What, miss me already?" Specter wore a dumb grin and, for some reason, a buzzing hat. That was definitely new.

"Oh, Specter, I'm so glad you're okay! You ran into the Everfree forest, and I went after you, you-"

The stallion paused as the pale Twilight Sparkle went through her not-at-all inconsiderable vocabulary looking for polite, but blunt, words to adequately sum up how she felt.

Specter watched with no small amount of amusement as she settled on frantic gesturing and frustrated choking sounds.

"I assure you, I wasn't in any danger," he chuckled.

"What are you talking about?! You could have been killed!"

"Yes, well, you were." the words were delivered simply, no malice nor condescension nor any form of sugar coating touched upon the weight of the words. They didn't need them.

Twilight stared at him, stared at him and laughed in his face, though there was a flicker of something, something so unfamiliar in the unicorn's eye.

It didn't escape his notice. Specter had quite clearly seen the flicker of doubt flash across Twilight Sparkle's always-confident, self assured gaze.

'Well, except when the Princessis mentioned, of course.'

"No, that's ridiculous, I can't be dead. I literally cannot be dead if I'm talking to you."

"For someone who merely a day ago talked to their grandmother again, oh yea of little faith, I'm curious as to how that would stop you."

"I- No, no, there was... I was attacked, and I- Oh Celestia, what happened?"

"Well, it's dead too, if that makes you feel better. Well, at least, it's deader than you are. On the sliding scale of 'Dead' to 'Not Dead' you're between me and it."

"Well-" Twilight's glassy eyes stared down at her body, which was mostly intact and moved as per normal, though she noticed the undeniable fact that she could not feel her legs. She had read enough war novels to understand what that cliche meant. "-I really, don't understand. I also really don't like not understanding things."

Her strangely alive, glossed over eyes swivelled to the earth pony sitting beside her, locking his gaze as she uttered a single plea.

"Help me. Help me understand, if nothing else."

"Well, at the moment, you haven't been dead very long when I found you, which is good, because it means you hadn't crossed over or anything irksome like that."

"Good word that, irksome." Twilight grinned a little despite herself.

"I know, right? It's pretty swell. Any who, I was able to sort of pluck your, err, 'soul' out of the ether, yes I know it's bunk science but would it kill you to just wait until I'm done? Actually, yes, it would, so stop trying to answer my rhetorical questions. Well, yes, you're currently haunting your own dead body."

"That sounds horribly morbid!"

"Well, it was the best I could do until I crammed you back in there."

"Crammed- Are you cracking jokes about my weight?" The tone was joking but the glare was all-too-serious.

"Ignoring that. No, just had to evict the new tenants."

"New- Oh, come on, did some pony try to hijack me? I swear to Celestia, I'm gone for five minutes-"

"Oh, no, nothing like that. It's just without your soul binding your body together it just becomes a new ecosystem. It's no longer 'Twilight' and it becomes 'huge civilization of microbes' as the dominate force. They sort of... Push back."

"Well, now I feel sort of bad."

"Don't, they were accelerating the decomposition process."

"Well that's rather rotten of them." they both giggled.

"I see what you did there, and it stank worse than you do right now."

"Well, anything I can- Wait, accelerating? That implies it hasn't stopped."

"Err, no, and I was getting to that. You wouldn't happen to know any healing spells, would you?"

"Of course! Minor, major and miscellaneous medical magics are all-"

"All I need to know. Sorry for cutting you off, Twilight, but it's important that we get started right away on making you less dead than you already are." he frowned down at her.

"Then why all the small talk?" she shot back.

"Because," he sighed, deflating a little as he sagged beside her, "we only get one chance at this, probably, and I was thinking if you were more comfortable and aware we would be less at risk, maybe. I've sort of never done this before."

"Telling me that was supposed to put me more at ease?!"

"I don't know, it's my first time, okay!" he flailed a hoof which, after Twilight started snickering, slammed firmly shut over his big, dumb, stupid mouth.

"Real mature, Twilight. Well, getting started on the whole 'less dead thing'? I've gotten a rather convenient neck brace for you, thanks again by the way Wilhelm, but it's still broken. Spinal fluid is almost perfectly intact, except for the part where it isn't, where it's almost surgically cut through. Usually that would be a worst case scenario, but since it's rather neat, it shouldn't be nearly as hard to knit the tissue together."

"Wow, that's-" the unicorn was stunned, "-incredibly knowledgeable of you. I didn't know you were a doctor?"

"Nah, I'm only good at autopsies. Patients are much more agreeable that way, I find. Anyway, this all hinges on you being able to perform magic. I have absolutely no idea whether you can or not, but being able to move your hooves is a good sign. I think. Unicorns are weird." He shrugged.

"Right, well, this will be a learning experience for both of us then. Learning... Right, just look at this as an experiment. I've got enough control over- Whoa."

"Whoa?"

"Whoa." Twilight breathed.

"Good whoa or bad whoa?"

"Just weird whoa. It's like-" her horn flickered with guttering sparks, "It's like I can push my magic, but, indirectly. It's like- okay, it's like, picture walking on stilts? Now imagine trying to marionette yourself on stilts, but it's not your body, it's your brain and everything tastes a bit like copper."

"Whoa."

"Exactly. I think I might be able to- Hnng." Twilight cut herself off with a grunt of obvious exertion, her horn flickering like an inadequately powered fluorescent bulb, whilst the wrinkles of torsion visibly lessened. Specter couldn't help but wince as he heard bone audibly cracking and a sort of snip snip squelch as spinal fluid reconnected.

It was all worth it when he felt that familiar popping in his ears, his head, his entire being.

Twilight was no longer here as a result of his summoning, she was here-

"Wait, you are still here right?"

"Oh, no, did I accidentally teleport again? I can't really see right now, you're going to have to tell me if-"

"Oh, no, no, you didn't, you haven't moved, and you're still in this plane of existence which is excellent."

• yes, she was here, mostly, and she didn't need him to keep it that way. She was just a regular old undead pony now!

'Everything's relative, I suppose.'

Twilight giggled a little, shaking her now firmly secured head a little, as much as the neckbrace allowed at least.

"Alright, Wilhelm, job done. You did an excellent job. I'm going to have to get you some ice cream, aren't I?"

Twilight winced in surprise, her look of shock diminished easily masked by the effects the tickling sensations on very sensitive flesh were having, as the changeling schlupped back into his more recognizable bug form, who in turn also blinked in confusion at Specter.

"What is ice cream? It sounds painful."

"Oh, I assure you, you are going to love ice cream. It's probably the closest thing to edible love ponies have ever made."

"That's a changeling." Twilight deadpanned, swaying uneasily to her hooves as her dry and pale eyes blinked her vision slowly back. She didn't need much, however, to tell the raspy, chitinous voice of a changeling drone when she heard it.

"Why yes, sorry, I don't believe I've formally introduce you. Twilight, this is Wilhelm, you might recognize him as your neckbrace. Wilhelm, this is Twilight Sparkle, the element of harmony you thought I was-" Specter caught himself and blushed slightly, gagging on the words he was about to be stupid stupid stupid enough to say.

"You really are full of surprises, huh?" the unicorn murmured, her uneasy eyes never leaving the changeling. For his part, Wilhelm just cocked his head, an easy curious expression directed towards Twilight.

"His hard and tough exterior belies soft, mushy insides, I assure you." Specter shot quick reassuring glance at the changeling, "It's just an expression, I assure you."

"Forgive me if I'm not so easily trusting of enemy invader." Twilight groused, dusting herself off.

"He's been at your throat for the last quarter hour or so, in the most literal sense of the phrase," Specter pointed out, "and did the exact opposite of making an attempt on your life."

The bug wandered up to Twilight, its motives unreadable. Whereas Specter knew this was because Wilhelm probably simply didn't have any, Twilight was obviously ill at ease.

"'This is about to be either very, very good, or very very messy.' he glanced briefly at the clearing around them, at the charred chunks of flesh, and mentally amended, 'well, messier than it already is, at least.'

Which is why Specter was filled with immense relief and just the tiniest bit of a swoon when Twilight noticeably swallowed back her discomfort and extended a slightly-trembling hoof.

"A friend of Specter's is a friend of mine." She announced before being scooped up into a chittering, delighted embrace by Wilhelm.

"I like you!" he announced matter-of-factly, "You're so soft and fuzzy!"

She chuckled, her body sagging in relief. "Well, you really are affectionate, aren't you?"

"I'm not a feck shon ate." he replied in obvious confusion, "I'm a bug!"

"You most definitely are." Twilight chuckled, gingerly patting him on the back. "I can see why Specter thinks we should get you some ice cream. You're simply adorable, aren't you!"

Wilhelm nodded. "However, like equine morality, I have layers and layers of subtle complexities."

Specter and Twilight stared at him mouth agape.

Twilight shot Specter a questioning look. Specter shot Wllhelm a confused glance. Wilhelm stared mournfully at the friend Specter had stepped on earlier.

"We should probably get back to the cottage, then, huh?" Specter slowly, cautiously asked.

"Books!" Wilhelm chirped delightedly.

That seemed to spark Twilight's interest, at the very least.

"Books! Yes! Finally back into familiar territory." Twilight sighed cheerfully. She blinked, glancing around at her hooves, seemingly only just remembering where exactly they were. "Probably a good excuse to get out of the forest now, too, huh?"

Specter snorted. "Nah, I'm a bit further in from here, actually."

"A bit further into here... Relative to what?" Twilight blinked.

'So much blinking. Maybe we should get some eyedrops, being dead cannot possiblybe good for one's health.'

"My cottage is a bit further in, I live about-"

"You live in the Everfree?"

"We really need to stop interrupting each other, huh?"

"You live in the Everfree?!"

"Yep." Specter

"What about all the animals? The manticores, the hydras, the timber wolves, the chimeras, the cockatrice, the nemean lions, the... The humidity?!"

"They all think I'm worse." he shrugged amiably, "But, you know, the humidity makes my mane frizzy in summer which can get pretty old pretty fast."

"You... But... What?!"

"I look far too cuddly right?" he grinned.

"What? Yes! You're... I mean... I don't..." Twilight just stared at the 'humble' earth pony, or rather, at a point a thousand yards away through him.

"Books remember! Books and hot cocoa!" Specter called cheerfully over a shoulder, already at a brisk trot back to the cottage. Wilhelm shrugged and buzzed onto his head, perching atop his head as a fuzzy busby, giving the pony the look of a cheerful Buckington guard.

Twilight stared dumbfounded as the two hopped and bobbed their way through the dense underbrush deeper into the foliage.

"That makes even less sense!" She pointed accusingly at Wilhelm the hat before galloping off after the two to inform them of just how impossible they were.

It took a while, all things told, until Specter pointed out that she was still technically dead, at which point most of the argument became internal. He felt bad about unleashing Twilight upon her own existence but, with no small amount of guilty pleasure, he couldn't help but note how adorable Twilight looked when she pouted like that.

"Home sweet home."

"Wasn't that a cockatrice slithering away from us just then?"

"Oh, don't worry about him, he knows better." Specter glared at the retreating chicken-thing. Despite not possibly being able to have seen him, Twilight noted the creature seemed to slink away just that much faster.

"He knows- I'm not going to question that, my head hurts too much already."

"Oh, gee, I'm flattered." Specter grinned ruthlessly, "I've done more than serious, and lethal, trauma? I'm touched, truly."

"Applejack isn't the only stubborn pony around here," Twilight grumped, "it'll take more than a little death to stop me being sarcastic."

"As opposed to a lot of death?"

"Well, yes, I suppose. A moderate amount of death even, maybe. But a little? Nope, no where near blunting my razor sharp wit."

"It's good to see you're as humble as you are beautiful." Specter sing-songed.

"Oh, please, I'm the most humble pony I know. No pony I know is nearly as modest as I am!" she grinned.

"Are we interrupting anything?" Princess Luna called from the kitchen, "We do apologize, but we helped ourselves to the delicious confections in your larder, they were most... Irresistible. It would take a being mightier than ourself to resist such temptation."

"Princess Luna!" Twilight breathed, prostrating herself slightly.

"Thou art doing it again, Twilight." Luna rolled her eyes.

"True," Twilight grinned, "But so are you?"

"Hmm? What are we-" Luna blushed visibly. "Oh! Oh, I'm afraid I am doing it again, am I not? We, I, am working on it, I promise. It is curious that we see you here, Twilight, we were not expecting you here. We, I, am here for your friend here." She frowned, slightly, a tight and serious crease along her jawline belying serious and solemn thought.

"You mean, Specter?" Twilight turned to glance at the grey stallion beside her and was instead treated to a view of red brickwork.

"Yes, the Necromancer," Luna nodded seriously, glancing at the rapidly diminishing cacophony of leaves and underbrush. "Strange, he appears to have entered into a footrace with a cockatrice for some reason."

Twilight just stared lamely off in the direction.

"Okay, this is the second time I've watched that silly pony run off into the Everfree, and I'm not going after him this time. Let nopony say Twilight Sparkle doesn't learn from her mistakes."

Luna cocked an eyebrow at Twilight who responded with a long, drawn out sigh.

"Long story, I'll need that silly pony back here to explain most of it, and I believe I was promised cocoa."

"Twilight, we are most surprised at you, do you not care about your friend's safety?"

"Luna, we are sitting in an adorable white-picket fenced cottage in the middle of the Everfree that he presumably made himself, because I sure as Tartarus don't see any pony coming out here to help him. From this we can deduce two things: One, he's a whole lot safer out there than I'd be, as I've rather painfully been made aware, and two, as soon as he runs out of breath he's going to realize he has nowhere to run to and come back. Probably wearing a different hat, so be prepared for that."

"Where would he get a new hat from in the middle of the Everfree forest?" Luna's other eyebrow raised to join its twin.

"It's not actually a hat, it's his changeling friend that likes to sit on his head as fuzzy attire, apparently." Twilight deadpanned.

"How- A changeling?" Luna spluttered, choking slightly on her drink, "This is a very strange friend you have here, Twilight Sparkle."

"I dread the day he and Pinkie Pie meet, I truly do." Twilight paused, "Then again, they'd probably share recipes." They both paused as they bit into another baked good.

"Truly a conundrum worthy of the ages." Luna agreed, sipping her drink.

The pair sat and talked cheerfully over tea and whatever they could find prepared in the cupboards, within reason, as they awaited the return of their gracious host. The pair of stoic lunar guards sat in the corner, each reading a comic book to pass the time.

It took a little over an hour for a tentative knock on the door to draw Luna and Twilight from their seats. A sulking Specter greeted them at the door, a dark montera drawn low over his grim expression.

"I realized I had nowhere to run to, let alone hide," he admitted, "so I thought my best hope would be to throw myself at your hooves and beg your mercy."

"Mercy?" Luna shot Twilight a glance, "What makes you think you need my mercy?"

"I know what you did to ponies with my unique ability in times long gone by." Specter sighed, "I've talked to them, after all." He shot one last, defeated, look at Twilight before bowing on his front knees, head low to the ground. "It is with a heavy heart that I, Specter Shift, accept the fate that I have been running from all these years."

"Specter, what are you talking about?" Twilight nudged him, offering Luna a consoling, but weak, smile.

"Princess Luna, my affairs are in order. You may execute me now, for Princess and Country, as is expected of you. I submit to my fate."

Twilight stood between the two ponies, rapidly looking at the both of them, silently begging an explanation. The Lunar guards had risen, she had noticed, and were standing beside Luna, as fast and silent as the night's breeze.

"I see." Luna boomed, her eyes white, her tone emotionless, drawing herself into an intimidating stance, causing Twilight to shrink away from the fearsome lunar princess, drawn protectively to Specter's side "Thou hast obviously shirked thy fate, thy justice, thy retribution for far too long, little pony, and as is expected of us, we shall deliver it."

Wilhelm flopped down over Specter's brow, flittering seamlessly from hat to blindfold, tied tight.

She loomed over the kneeling Specter, who forced back a bitter tear which leaked down past the blindfold as power emanated in staccato waves from the fearsome creature before him, and uttered the dreaded words, the words he had been fearing for his entirely far-too-long life, "Prepare thyself for our judgement!"