Ponies with Horns

Author's Notes: The features on the site are a bit bork. For instance, paragraph spacing isn't correcting. Sorry for the alternative spacing.

“Buuuuuuuuuuuuck Yoooooooouuuuuu!” Yelled Mother Talzin Starlight Glimmer as she shook her head back and forth, the Talzin face jerking hither and tither.
“No! Mom’s dignity!” cried the cauldron… or more likely some purpley-orangy child from within.
“Mother Talzin!” Tutted Sunburst “You’re setting a bad example for the children!—”
“Children we have brought that you are expected to respect!” Sassed a delightgully purple alicorn colt.
“—Moreso than when you decided to have the Wellspring children kill each other for the benefit of having more white trees!” continued Sunburst.
Starlight angrily hissesed. “How dare you expose the secretes of ME, Mother Talzin!”
One of the foals [Barley Ord Mandel’s Vendetta Red] a crushed crimson-indigo colored alicorn emerged from the cauldron and perched their forelegs over the side, a shifting ocean-blue & golden-brown aura imbued their horn as they picked up a discarded face from the bloody grond and the applied it to their face with a splorch! “Mother Starl-I mean-Mother Talzin will not forgive this insult! A chapter Traitor legion upon your house!”
Sunburst turned towards an invisible 4rth wall. “Good thing I have an underground retreat incase my children accidently crush our house with space marines.”
“Traitor Husband! Traitor Sons! Traitor Daughters—” Twilight Sparkle angrily hissed.
“Purple Book Mom beckons…” whispered a Taiji, Ying-Tang sunlight white & nebula purple colt [Justice Vanilla Starling] to a group of ponies, sirens, Kurins.
“I know, right?!” Chimed in Starlight.
“But we’re not listening because we’re traitors!” declared a springtime Kurin name [Double Bladezing Awesome Sauce Summer] chimed in
{Kurins and Niruks use a season based system to describe how old they are, Younglings are Springs, Adolescents are Summers, Adults are Autumns, and Elders are Winters. Arguments often arise and many switch forms based on being declared part of one season or the other.]
“—A Chapter of World Eaters upon you both!” Twilight opted to cozy up to Flash Sentry, smashing gore from her viscera covered body into his, admittedly rather stained, mellow yellow coat. (Wait, is this pony Flash, or High School Sweetheart Flash? Fuck it! I’m getting drunk offa whatever I find in the office! What does it even matter anymore?) “I’ve decided I prefer my yellow children.”
“Hurray!” Exclaimed a royal yellow gossamered scaled feathered alicorn colt [named: Riot On Shooting Star. Yes we can name them before someone says a thing, as long as we are safe in the box text.], “We’re finally a valuable color to our Purple Overmother.”
Twilight groaned, “I’m running out of Astarte to sick on my traitor fam…”
Flash Sentry nuzzled her, “You’re not getting even a heavy bolter from me, you delightful fuck mook.”
“Oh hey, I’m a trend-setter!” Sunburst said, raising his muzzle up proudly.
Glaring, Twilight dipped her head down to the ground and snagged a face by the left eye. She began to speak in a lowish growl. “When I get my bow back, the first thing I’m going to do is clip your wings.”
Flash’s Wing’s suddenly unfurled to their full length, “Erm… is that a promise?”
“Hurray!” Said one of the older fillies, her mane light orchid, her coat & wings mellow yellow, [Her name Starla Sterington Soundboard] her body red plats all over. “Our parents are feuding!”
“The blood games shall be glorious!” Said a bleached faced wearing colt, supposedly green, though the earie glow from the, quite occupied, cauldron. He adjust his fake plastic horn so that the hole that had been punched through the face widened with a ‘skkktch’. “I just need my bow.”
“You’re not getting your bows!” hissed Rarity as she laid, limbs spread upon a dome-like pile of, mostly bone-white bows. Their energy strings currently inert. Opal, her Carmel-colored husband [named Carmel], their litter of kittens, and a number of children, possibly adults, disguised as cats busily attaching hornish like objects to the foreheads of cats lacking horns, began hissing, spitting, crabbing, and pawing at their ‘horns’. Some of them running off rather than deal with the, often bloody, horns. (Uh-Oh, someone better call the ACPCA. Not me. I like watching cats scamper. Shit! Now people know that more than one cat exists!)
A sky-blue coated ‘cat’, horn already attached, (Man, anyone remember Aeon Flux? That shit was off the chain.Holy crap! It mentioned an outside Hasbro Franchise! I’m chewing through my restraints!) nibbled at a bone-bow, gripped it with both sets of teeth and scampered off, the pile sagging, then collapsing towards the hole left by the bow’s absence.
“Staaaarlaaa Lulamoon!” crooned Sunburst. “You bring that bow back right now! It hasn’t been properly inventoried!”
Rarity pawed with all four hooves at the bows as they slid down and to her left. The cats scattered, traitorous being they are…
A Space orange alicorn [Prominence] emerged from underneath Sunburst’s cloak and declared, “Traitor felines! I deliver onto each of thee a Sister of Silence!” This delighted the other children who began busily getting onto their comms, using magic, encanting ancient Imperium rights, and also setting lures with big piles of gold, found flamers, and bolter-rifles.
Unable to find purchase with the sliding bone-bows, Rarity slid with the sliding bows onto the floor, continually ‘pawing’ at each pow as if it would stop the slide.
Another colt, this [Tony Stork Guardian Mode] deep-nebula purple unicorn decided to sweeten the pot with a custom DL-44 with hunting stock. “That auta-get those bitches…”
Rarity clambered at the floor, sending gold and bone bows in all directions, accidentally waging a few adults and a kid or two in the head.
An offspring of Rarity-Dazzle [Rarity Adagio] bowls over the box text mentioned Tony Stork Guardian Mode, this yearling filly looms over him and glowers, her Emperor’s Children colored (Shimmering Gold, deep-nebula purple, and combustible lemon yellow) cascading mane that fell around him. “Pray tell be nice about the Sisters, they’ve chained men to their Penitence engines for less.
[A ‘Yearling’ is a horse who is neither a foal nor an adult, but in-between.]
Rarity finally found purchase with the blood and visverific giblitified ground and tore in the direction of Starla Lulamoon. “You hussy! I’ll have that BOW!”
TSGM gave the Rarity-Dazzle a pensive shit-eating grin. “What? I was helping!”
RA glanced at the blaster then back at her plray (OH shit! That sounds serious. I better see if Child Protection Services still exists on Dathomir.) “That’s not bad. I might have a spare blaster of my own.”
TSGM whistled. “Oh, I’d like to see that.”
“Starlight! Those kids are making the googlies at eachother and getting away! You’re failing at being a helicopter parent.”
“Bows are free!” Declared a Autumn brown-tan & deep-ocean azure & bright lime green colored boy- girl scaled gosimer winged Kurin-Siren with a sperm-whale tale. [Bouy Oceanus Xarpo ‘KillJoy Name: Box Burrier]
[A ‘Killjoy’ name is one that is used for a gang of ‘Killjoys’, rebels and terrorists most often aligned against corrupt and unjust systems.]
“SHUT! IT! You Crystaliarian Knocker-upper! I’m too pregs-
“Yeah! Mom is too pregs!”
“-Right. I’m too pregs to chase down every pair of tykes that are going to stare lovingly into each other’s voids! You high-expecting, Cronenbergian crooner, absolute BaaaaaSTARD!”(-1 Next Chapter Marker)
[left]
Etsy painting available
[url=https://www.stonebrewing.com/beer/arrogant-bastard-ale
Arrogant Bastard Ale, Put it in your face before it's collected![/left]

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Justice, Ventress’s wrinkled face still dangling from his horn, blue-streaked through a round red door, doorknob flung into the pale-bone walls of Ventress’s-er-her/him’s hovel. “Hello home, which was clearly a living, breathing, creature that the HOA marked for execution! I would have knocked, but realized it was my house.”
A trio of laughing yearlings ran through the, rather open, doorway. Runner-up Dark-chocolate alicorn filly [Tonya Murk] made it in next, a silver metal appeared around her neck on a red string as a gold metal with a black ribbon appeared around Justice’s neck. “Uh… Second! Apparently!”
A gold-deep blue-robin speckled, shark-finned Siren-Niruk-Pony that was flaming with electric azurem white, black and crimson [Turquoise Stark-Shark-Selene] squeaked her glowing moon-white saber-horn before her bro-sis, a bronze metal on a blue ribbon appearing around her neck. “Third! I get to stand on a platform and lament I’m not taller!”
The third kurin-siren-pony’s, their coat a Star Lord Maroon, Sun White, and Super-massive Hole Black ,Star Lady Midnight Blue, their mane a collection of pocket-watch-like golden and brass gears with electric/swamp/indigo green [Zeitgeist Vendetta R. Chronos] hoof crossed the damaged threshold. “Damnit! I was going to thank Steven Spielberg, my parents, then GOD in that order!”
A Weatees box with a picture of the foal/filly appeared with the words, “Let’s Talk” in sharpie written on it.
Sunset Shimmer, her bright turquoise eyes obscured by the DAthimorian sun bleached (Oh no, either that’s a typo or the District Attorney of Dathimor is out for blood.) face dangling by the forehead on her horn clipped the door-frame with her shoulder, busting more red wood into the ‘home’. “Ow… Where’s my prize…?”
With the whistling sound of an incoming mortar, a..well, a MORTAR bursts through the red-wood ceiling and exploded in front of Sunset Shimmer. The startled ponies beheld a trench-coat donned, gas-mask wearing man with a well quaffed blonde Nike-swatch of hair. “Sunset Shimmer, Tom Trench hear of 666 News! Empress Sunset!” Tom extended a black gloved covered hand. “A pleasure to meet you.”
“Damnit” the other four ponies exclaimed in unison as more enraptured ponies, sirens, and Kurins poured in. A chorus of moans roughly all saying “! Should have thrown the race,” rang out.
Sunset Shimmer grinned nervously, sweet beginning to appear on her furry burnt-orange brow. “Uh… Hi, Tom Trench… it’s great to see you again.”
“Now then, you didn’t finish in the money, you actually placed fifth! However, I’m pleased to introduce the sixth-or maybe seventh after yours truly!”
Sunset’s jaw dropped and a noiseless scream escaped.
“Well, we’re all aflutter…” said T.S.S.S. [Turquoise Stark-Shark-Selene]

With a HELLISH deep blue and cyrillian flame a Kirin Ichiban with great-white shark and alicorn features, appeared. Her coat was technicolor and her mane was a blazing all chromatic. Technaro had returned to the land of the living, and Hell came (Cum… Can I just write cum?) with her.
And before Tom Trench could so much as say ‘Well, that sure was impressive.’ Justice and Technaro, T.S.S.S., Z.V.R.C., T.M., and Sunset Shimmer all imbued Tom with their powers and he began to transform into twins.
[A.I. Prompt: Two Kurins Niruks with Megladom features and alicorn features, one black with a Nike swash mane and fire engine transformer coat, one with a flaming mane pronounced fins hearts on her flanks and wearing sunglasses sunglasses.
A.I. Prompt: Two Kurins Niruks KIRIN ICHIBAN with The Meg Megladom Shark Sharp Teeth features and alicorn features, one black with a Nike swash sun-straw mane, shining turquoise eyes and fire engine biomatrix red transformer trench coat, one with a flaming mane pronounced fins hearts on her flanks and wearing sunglasses sunglasses and fire engine frosting blue fathom witchblade trench coat with gun-tridents
Tom Trench and Technaro Tomorrow}
Justice took a break from watching the majesty of TTs and T.T.s transformation to sweep Technaro off her hooves with a deep-cosmic azure glow of his horn and plant his lips on his, diving his tongue straight into her mouth and tasting just where she had been for all these years.
Technaro blushed so indigo pink that the Ranchor bones began to sing and her mane flared a fiery-magma glowing red. She grinded her pelvis into his and --- (Record Scratch… Well… Shit. Now we have like… two or three sex scenes and orgies to write…)
--Teen Edit
“Who do I bring this box of delicious cereal too to talk?” Zeitgeist Vendetta R. Chronos posed.
“Wait,” Justice said, examining the box with his daughter/son’s face on it as Technaro & Sunset sat on thei haunches behind him and licked their forelegs like satisfied cats. “Do I need to take you to your sponsors?” He looked around and found his ‘Ventress’ mask and put it on then he was a She. SHe glared at Sunset and hissed in a feminine tone. “You! This is YOUR fault!”
Technaro glowered at Sunset “Yeah, Sunset! You Money grubbing whore-traitor-wife!” (Yay! Technaro is back from the dead. Yes that Technaro.) “A chapter of Ultramarines are inbound to catalogue your failures!”
Technaro laughed as Sunset quickly scanned the floor, covered and scattered pottery, artifacts, and furniture not ready for pony-siren-megladoom-kurin-niruk love making. She found her mask, put it on, then she was perhaps a younger she.
“AS IF!” Sunset shot back. “It’s not my fault the child wasn’t properly trained!”
Justice glared and swatted at his gold metal with a hoof. He opted to take it off and whap it across Sunset’s face. As she nursed her red cheek. He returned his, now bent, metal to around his neck. “Funny, but you should have accused me of living out my ‘glooooory daaaays!’”
A call of, “Watch out! Starla Lulamoon is on a bow rampage and Rarity’s pissed!” rang into the bone house.
Author Notes:
“This is Tom Trench II or maybe 11! Next chapter! We will maybe get lines!”
“This is Technaro Tomorrow! Supposedly I will have been fucked, or their will finally be a mature version with the Dazzelings having sex.”
“Peeps been waiting! It’s been too long… you prudes!”
“Damnit Tom, I was going to call everyone a prude.”
“Well you pruny bitch—”
“Stop talking! I’ll kill you!”
“—let’s leave everyone with some snippets.”
[Justice Habbakkuk] I’m Turning Japaneasy, I’m turning Japaneasy, I really think so.

[Onion Pepper Salsa D.]

-1
“Well BUUUUUUCK YOU! SOMEONE has to VOYER the children!”

“Starlight! You gave the children a Pennant engine!”
“Lies and slander! The Sisters provided the engine! I merely gave them permission!”
“You’re supposed to consult with me before the kids engage in crucifixion! WE TALKED ABOUT THIS!”
“What was I supposed to do?! Say no in front of the Sisters of Silence?! They have big, scary robots.”
“I’ve spoken to their Dreadnaughts! They’re very reasonable!”

“What are you doing in my house?!”
“Oh no, she found us!” Exclaimed Justice in a panic.
Quickly thinking Sunset applied the Ventress mask, a bit diagonally to Justice’s face.
“Uh-I mean- You get out of MY house!”

Dan & Pinkie ^
“DAaaaaaAAAAAaaaan! I have an IDEA! Arm the children with Crowbars!”
“Great Idea, Pinkie! Then they can—”
“Then we can steal!”
“—I was just about to say that! Then we can steal! I mean-Then they can steal!”
(Idiot! You don’t announce that you’re ‘chewing through your restraints’. You just start biting and eating that sweet, sweet, hemp!)
Parts to add: Rarity on her dragon hoard of magical force bows, Spike’s crystal eating problem continues via piles of kyber crystals, Button declares himself a shadowy alicorn with soaked coat, broken bow on forehead ne and applies a sticky bone to Aria Blaze’s (SR.) head, Pegasus Sonata Dusk emerges with many “horns”, Octavia, not one to be left out, has a Dathomorian brass intsrament , on her head, Rainbow Dash is “collecting colors”, decided a crown of small bone shards is to be her “birthright”, Twilight and Sunburst argue about antiquing. Sunset and Trixie’s kids start pilfering from Rarity and Oppalessence’s horde, their parents uttalize them as a distraction. Starlight just can’t stop toppling governments, she has a problem, and her 12 step program failed immediately when she thought, maybe, just maybe, her off-again, on-again boyfriend’s dads? Moms? A ‘higher power’ she could give herself up to (The Abyss, AzAzel, The Nameless Mist). Disorder is labeling the errant faces littered across the battlefield, ‘Baby-eater’, ‘Rapist’, ‘Just plain rude,’ etc… Minuette and Colgate save the gang, the first time, from Sunset’s wrath at horrid friendship crafts, probs made by them Alicornian bastards, or something.
Arrogant Bastard Ale, Put it in your face before it's collected!
Twilight: “Do you want the face mask on or off?”
Flash: “Off please.”
Twilight: “Well too bad.”

Panic Station and Order respond to Adagio’s quite rude remark (Order & Disorder, Panic & Calm… Discord & Eris can come too)
Autumn Blaze!” Disorder cried heroically as he summon-tossed the confused and semi-hapless Qurin through a plate glass window. “I need your help!”

“OH my sticks and coins!” cursed Autumn Blaze as she got up to her hooves and shoock off the glass shards from her fur. She spun round and glared at Disorder. “You’re lucky I have a shell!”

“Yes! Luck! A good thing you have! Something I don’t really need at this particular moment! I need your help fixing a window!”

Autumn Blaze’s left eyebrow sank. “You don’t say.”

“Your Pinkie Pieish attitude won’t fix stained glass, my little Qurin!” declared Disorder. “I need help reparing a…” Discord peared downward towards the next paragraph, “…fresca!”

Autumn Blaze sighed as she once again dramatically spun to notice a fresca of mostly white, and canary yellow pieces scattered across the polished ivory floor. “Oooooh, good. Do you need me to get mad enough to slag it into a red-hot ball of glass so we can reshape it in Equestria’s maybe reigning Monarch?!” she posed.

“No!” Disorder replied curtly. “I could have done that! Well…” he tilted his head. “Not the part were we romantically reshape the molten glass, a la some ghosty movie from a planet you’ve probably never herd of.”
Autumn Blaze sighed. “The movie is literially named Ghost. We watched last week.”

“…Shit!” And then Disorder was a Ghost.

“See, this is why I needed your help!”
“I’m sorry! I’m so sorry!”
“It’s fine! It’s not like you killed me. I’m just now ethereal and translucent! Like a Scoo…Wait, that dog might have stopped exist-” Disorder intentionally ceased talking as his features became distinctly canine.
“Well, how do I make you not a ghost?!” Exclaimed Autumn Blaze. “DAMNIT! Not again!”
Disorder had ceased being ethereal and translucent. He now was quite stone like, very visible and stuck, mid-pawing at the air. “Hurray! I have been Fu Dogged once more!”
Autumn Blaze grit her teeth. “I don’t know if can handle birthing another brood of Qurins and Stone Balls!”
“It’s fine!” Proclaimed Disorder. “Finding one of the already birthed children, or another delightful child that wishes to be underpaw and guarding entry-ways will suffice.”
“Ooooooooh, good!” Snarled Autumn Blaze. “I’ll go get my kidnapping net!” she declared making a production of turning around and throwing herself through an unbroken plate glass window.
Disorder gasped. “She did it again! Wait!” he cried, quite unable to move, save his mouth.

“What was wrong with it?”
“Did you like it? I loathed it.
The pony frowned.
Another tike shook his head. “IT was pretty gauche.”
“I liked it!” replied Pony 1.
“It was also massively haunted.” Disorder said as hundreds of tiny ghosts emerged from his flaming mane and evaporated into the air.

Order “I spent all century ignoring that!” he quipped about the broken window. “’Tia’s little, ‘And I’m everyone’s friend, Jesus!’ piece she had commissioned and installed at the cost of a Death Star II’s worth of independent contractors.

“Oh, good. A Valley under a too bright heaven!” He glowered upwards at the sun. “I bark at thee, [adverb] sky orb! I bark at thee.”

“Staaaarlight, you where right…” Crooned a, clearly, up until recently crying Sunburst. “Face when properly cooked is the best!”
“…” Starlight simply stared at Sunburst in disbelief.
“HEY!” shouted Twilight. “Stop getting bits of face on my throne!”
“Why don’t you come up here and make me, Twilight!”
“AHEM!” Starlight said.
“Staaaaarlight! You don’t literially say ‘ahem’ you—”
“SHUT THE BUCK UP, Sunburst!” cried Starlight. “Twilight, I need the room.”
“But it’s my throne!”
“Now, Twilight!” Starlight insisted as she picked up Twilight in a deep sky-blue aura and threw her out the double doors. Slamming them behind Twilight.
Twilight looked perplexed for a moment then intoned outload. “Wait… do I even need a throne.”