The King of Starbucks

Memories, they are precious things. Without them, we can't remind ourselves of the good times we've shared with those we hold close to our hearts. Without them, we forget who we are, where we come from, and where we are going. Memories, however, are easily corruptible. They fade with time. They warp from misinformation during recollection. And they cloud our judgment when we need them most.

When one looks back on their life, reminiscing about the past to enjoy the happy moments, they tend to overlook the parts that made them who they are; the pain, the torment, the suffering, and all the other negative things that happened throughout their life. Those moments, as much as we loathe to admit, are what truly make us who we are. One does not become stronger by partying or laughing, nor do they gain a thicker skin by being shielded against what they don't like. To grow as an individual, you cannot run when danger chases you down. You cannot hide when something you fear stares you down. Pain must be familiar to your body, mind, and soul. WIthout that intimate familiarity. When faced with adversity, everything will appear impossible to overcome. Everything will try to bring you down if you try to stand up. And most importantly: Victory will be nothing more than a hopeless dream.

That's all I am now... just a memory. I was nothing more than a small, insignificant thing that couldn't influence the world in any way, shape, or form. Truthfully, when I died, I thought "that's it, this is all I am; a nobody with no skills or notable talent of any kind, dying in a ditch after being robbed for what little I owned. Should've given that homeless man at the park my lunch. He looked like he needed it more."

I wasn't a religious person either, but I did hope that when someone dies. Their souls would find either heaven or hell waiting for them. I think most people, even the non-believers, hope the afterlife would be something than an infinite void of absolute nothingness. It's a comforting wish, but would a deity, god, or otherwise, give such an insignificant speck of life something grand for achieving nothing in his or her life? Probably not. Only those with the will, the drive to be more than themselves would become an angel, reincarnate as a hero, or something else just as grand to continue their mission of generous self-sacrifice. Me? A nobody that treated school as a joke, that prefers to play games rather than work or do something meaningful, and didn't plan for the future? Being reborn as a slug would probably be the best I could get.

It's sad really, having my final thoughts engulfed by a legacy I wouldn't leave behind. Then again, I didn't have much else to think of at the time. I didn't have a family, no friends, relatives, or anyone for that matter. My only notable accomplishments involved reaching the highest tier in ranked multiplayer in a bunch of different games, which doesn't mean all that much, to be honest. Though, I did value what knowledge I willingly chose to study. Understanding military strategy and philosophy helped with all the RTS games I liked to play, like Starcraft and Civilization, but not by much.

Huh, it's funny thinking about my life. The amount of procrastination I've done must have driven my teachers insane. Even as I stared at the white light that usually came with dying, my laziness came to the forefront of my mind. I put off everything until the last minute before rushing to finish my work within hours of my deadline. That always led to mediocre final products of my half-assed effort. If there was one thing I would change in my life, it would have to be my laziness. Though, if there is a heaven or if I reincarnated, I'll try to change that aspect of my life as much as possible. It will be difficult, mostly because old habits tend to die hard. But I have the feeling it will be worth it in the end.

"My, my, my... how melodramatic. And here I thought the God of Angst, Melancholy, couldn't get any more boring!" spoke John de Lancie in my head.

"Great, my last conscious thought alive is Q from Star Trek. I think the blood loss is starting to get to my head," I chuckled weakly. "Though, could be worse. I could have got Castro...or Hitler. Angelina Jolie would have been nice, but beggars can't be choosers."

"Sadly, I'm not too fond of Dictators. They tend to make things too bloody for my tastes. As for Tigress from Kung Fu Panda? HA! In your dreams my little almost dead human," Q said mockingly.

"Almost dead? Damn, how long does it take to die of blood loss? Also, did I at least make it to my car?" I wondered out loud.

"Well, considering your mugger missed all your major organs and arteries, you got lucky in that regard. As for your second question? You did, but you collapsed right next to it with the keys stuck in the hole, which is a shame. You had so much potential, but then you had to get stabbed in the middle of a dark parking lot by a poor sap who didn't have the common courtesy to leave a thank you letter! Cleary the thugs of this world have no class."

"T-That sucks," I chuckled weakly, blood dripping down my chin. The taste of iron was a little unpleasant, but so is cold syrup. I idly wondered if Q was going to offer me a deal in exchange for my soul. Seriously though, I know I should have died by now. So what's taking it so long? The stab wound hurts you know!

"Oh don't be such a baby," Q said with a light pat on my head. "At least you didn't get trapped in stone for over a millennium. Not being able to scratch an itch for over a thousand years is absolute torture!" He paused for a moment. I'm not sure why, Q wasn't known for going silent for no reason whatsoever, but when he did. The entire world went quiet. When he spoke again, his voice lost all its cheer and gained an ominous tone. If I could spare the energy to shudder, I probably would have.

"As much as I wish to joke around and generally be a public nuisance. I do have a reason to be here, and I have very little time to do so. Now, before I get into the nitty-gritty details, I must ask you three questions to determine whether or not to save you."

"And that would be?" I wondered out loud.

"First: What's the difference between Fire and Water?"

Figuring this was some elaborate test to get into heaven, I gave him an honest answer. "Scientifically, Water is the liquid state of matter while Fire is just a chemical reaction. On a philosophical level, Water is the state of serenity and fluidity. Because water has no form, it is considered a near-perfect representation of adaptive change. As for Fire? Fire is both life and death. It's a primordial force of nature capable of great good or destructive evil. Fire can purify food and water, cauterize wounds, and keeps us warm when it is cold. Fire can also turn everything into ash. From trees of grand forests to the very core of the planet. Fire is the blood of all life and creation."

"Second: What is Humanity's greatest flaw?"

"Our will," I replied instantly. "There is something about it that drives us to become something more than what we are. With it, we have achieved feats most thought impossible. With it, we also caused destruction so absolute, life as we know it, can be erased with just a press of a button."

"Interesting," Q hummed thoughtfully. "Now, for your final question: If you were given a choice to sacrifice yourself for the following individuals; who would you choose? The Child? The Mother? The Father? Or...Yourself?"

That's a trick question if I've ever heard one. If you sacrifice yourself for the child, you could either traumatize him or her and cause a long chain of events that will usually lead to revenge and the inevitable death of the child. The Mother will become a widow and forsake her love. Not to mention the potential of her killing herself just to be with you would make the sacrifice pointless. The Father, on the other hand, will do everything in his power to prevent another sacrifice from happening, even to the point of becoming a martyr himself. As for the last one? Suicide is the cowards way out. Period. Anyone who kills themselves to prevent any form of suffering is simply selfish. With all that in mind, I gave him my answer.

"None of the above. They all die in the end anyway. It's better to preserve your own life for as long as possible. That way, you can keep everyone you care about alive a lot longer than by sacrificing yourself. Blood follows blood, and killing yourself will only create a river."

"So did I pass? Cause I really want to die now. The ethereal white light is kinda burning my eyes at this point, and I don't want to wake up in the next life as a blind man."

"Haha."

What?

"Haha. haha."

Oh, God. Please tell me he isn't going to laugh. I've had enough insanity in this life already.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Welp, I'm going to hell. Hopefully, the demons will be a little gentle. A broken Q is a scary Q. And his laugh is insanely terrifying.

"Oh, marvelous! Simply marvelous!" Q chuckled with a clap of his non-existent hands. "I knew one of the most boring individuals I've met would be absolutely interesting! And he deserves a prize!"

"Wait, what? No! No prizes! Just let me die in peace already!"

"And guess what this lucky contestant out of one hundred and eight get?"

"Please, God. I've been a good guy. Sure I procrastinated like hell, did a little crime, I paid my taxes, I recycled and was a decent citizen. Don't let the Devil take my soul. I'll be happy as a slug! Please, don't let Q take me away!"

"A PONY!" Q cheered demonically with happy-go-lucky music playing in the background. "Bon voyage my little human, and enjoy your new life! Don't disappoint!" And with a snap of his fingers, the white light of death came rushing towards me. I screamed a manly scream before I knew no more.