Shining Armor is a Goddamn Moron
A stroll in the park
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(133 votes - 53%) Let’s take Flurry to Central Park to watch the volleyball tournament!
“I was thinking that we could go to the park. It’s such a lovely day out, and it would be so nice to get away from the boiling sun… it really seems like it bounces off of everything.”
“Seriously… you and mom must spend, like, millions of bits on skin cancer treatment for the Empire.”
Shining chuckled. “Actually, it’s not so bad, Crystal ponies actually seem to let most of the radiation pass through them… and we’re pretty insistent on tourists making sure they were plenty of protection.”
“Wearing protection is important.” Flurry agreed, before smacking a hoof against her face. “Bleh, there’s just no way for me to avoid remembering what happened, is there?”
“I still don’t know what the big deal is, Flurry.” Shining sighed. It certainly was strange, but it wasn’t anypony’s fault. “If anything, we should be able to laugh it off.”
“Dad… I... “ Flurry groaned, hanging her head as they trotted along toward the park. “I was basically asking you to… mount me. I can’t just laugh that off.”
“Let’s make a deal then - if you can’t laugh it off, let’s pull it off.”
“What!?” Flurry’s head snapped to him, a blush forming on her face.
“Pull it off like a band-aid.”
“Oh thank Celestia.” Flurry let out a breath she’d been holding.
“It’s always way worse to anticipate these sorts of things.” Shining smiled. “It’s way better to just get it over with.”
Flurry sighed, shuffling her wings with a groan. “Do we have to?”
“Yep, So tell me the most embarrassing thing that’s bothering you right now… then I’ll tell you the most embarrassing thing bothering me. Deal?”
Flurry stiffened again. Shining could see her big blue eyes racing back and forth in thought. “...h-how about the most embarrassing thing from that whole sex-ed class debacle? I don’t know if I can share the most most embarrassing thing bugging me.”
“OK, sure.” Shining shrugged.
Flurry sighed again. “Actually… that isn’t much better either.”
“C’mon, just spill. You’ll feel better after you do.” Shining prodded, cloyingly.
“Fine!” Flurry grunted, then turned her head away from Shining and mumbled something under her breath.
“What did you say, Flurry? It won’t work if I can’t understand you.” Shining craned in closer, directing one of his ears at his daughter.
“I said: it’s really embarrassing that I thought my dad… you… had a really… big…” Flurry stared at the ground again and mumbled the last word.
“Huh?”
“I thought you had a hot stallionhood, OK!?” Flurry covered her boiling face with a wing. “Celestia please strike me dead with a lightning bolt. I can’t believe I just said that. I can’t believe I think my dad’s dick is attractive.” She threw up a hoof in frustration. “I shouldn’t even know what my dad’s dick looks like!”
“Actually, about that…” Shining cocked his head, as he remembered some of the events of the incident a few days ago. “It actually did seem kind of like you recognized me when you saw my… uh… junk.”
Flurry’s hackles raised slightly and she straightened her back, stiffening with anxiety. “O-oh?”
“Am I just crazy or did you somehow recognize my… uh… me?”
“There’s actually a perfectly reasonable explanation.” Flurry seemed to be sweating nervously. “S-see, remember when you gave mom that clone-a-willy kit a few Heathswarmings ago?”
“Yeah. Hey, how did you know about that?” Shining asked.
“Well… mom told me about it after she caught me borrowing… uh… it… from her tiara drawer.” Flurry blushed and shook her head, as though trying to clear it from her head. “So it kind of… popped out, when I saw it.”
“Ah…” Shining grunted. The cogs in his head were turning slowly. “But why did you need to borrow tha-”
“SO!” Flurry coughed, cutting him off. “I told you about my most embarrassing moment. Now you’ve gotta tell me yours.”
Shining put a hoof up to his chin and thought for a long minute. “I think I farted when I passed that poindexter at the start of the lecture… and I’m pretty sure she noticed.”
“DAD!” Flurry stomped a hoof, nearly making her trip and fall head over hooves. “First off, gross. Second: that was the most embarrassing thing from the whole afternoon?”
“I guess… yeah...”
“Dad! I… squirted on your face.” Flurry held out a feather for each event, as she listed off one by one the things that had occurred. “You came all over your daughter… your daughter actually grabbed you…” Flurry looked more stunned then upset. “Dad… I winked at you - and not with an eye.”
Shining shrugged with a chuckle. “It’s not anything I hadn’t seen before, Flurry.” He laughed aloud. “I changed your diapers for years you know.”
“This isn’t like that! Not at ALL!” Flurry groaned. “I’m not some cute little baby foal anymore!”
“Don’t worry Flurry, you still have a very nice tush.” Shining grinned.
Flurry was blushing now. “Y-you mean that? Did you think I had a nice... butt?”
Shining paused, thinking back to the vision of Flurry’s tight, teen-filly ass in his face, her plot winking and drooling with juices. He swallowed anxiously. She really had been a hot, fuckable mare… at that moment.
“Hey!” Flurry grunted, poking him. “I told you the truth about your… y’know. You have to tell me the truth too!”
“Y-yes… there was definitely a moment there… where you looked… very sexy.”
“A moment?”
“Well, maybe more than a moment. But yes… if you weren’t my daughter… *ahem*” Shining cleared his throat with a cough, then looked off to one side. There was just no way he could complete that thought.
Flurry blushed, looking the other direction. “Th-thanks… y-you too… I can… uh… see what mom saw in you.”
Shining laughed. “Y’know that she didn’t see me naked until after we were engaged, right? Believe it or not I actually won her over without the use of my incredible equipment.” Shining joked, sending a wink back at Flurry.
“Pfft, easy there dad. No mare likes a stallion who is always boasting about his junk. Even if it is worth boasting about.” She rolled her eyes.
“Do you know how I met your mother, actually?” Shining asked with a grin.
“Yes.” Flurry groaned. “She’s told me, like, a hundred times about how you came up with a goofy float for the homecoming parade, then you sang her an awful love-song on it with your gang of Ogres and Oubliettes nerd friends in front of the whole school.”
“Hey! She always tells it to make me look like a gigantic dork - I’ll have you know that’s not how it went down!” Shining protested, tapping a hoof against his chest. “I was a pretty cool cat.”
“Uh-huh.” Flurry deadpanned. “So how did it go down then?”
“Well… I… uh…” Shining tried to think up a cool story - preferably one that involved sharks, laser beams, and rockets.
“You… were a gigantic dork…?” Flurry offered, seeing that her father was struggling to come up with an alternate history.
Shining sighed, slumping slightly. “I mean… yeah… I guess.”
Flurry giggled, covering her muzzle. “That’s cool though, dad. I like dorks.”
“Oh hey, here’s the tournament I was hoping we could watch!” Shining pointed over at the sports field area of the park.
They’d made their way through much of the park as they’d chatted, eventually reaching the heart of the gorgeous green gardens. With the amount of foliage and the sprawling, myriad dirt pathways, it was easy to enjoy the beautiful trot without having run into even a single other pony.
The sports-area was different though. A single large pond marked the exact centre of the large park, which would often itself be used for Crystal sporting competitions… like swimming, sailing or rowing races. Today, however, it sat empty… populated only by a few noisy waterfowl. Instead, a large group of ponies had gathered to watch the beach volleyball competition.
The sport had rapidly been gaining in popularity since its breakout in the west coast cities of Las Pegasus and Vanhoofer. The fun of being able to dive into soft sand to prevent a ball from being grounded and the two versus two format made it much easier for amateurs to get into the sport.
It also helped that the professionals tended to be very attractive mares, who wore skimpy bikinis that somehow made them more attractive than if they had been wearing nothing at all.
Some enterprising ponies had managed to import a couple of cartloads of sand to the Empire, enough to set up two courts, and today was an exhibition of some of Equestria’s top talent. On the Eastern court was the Appleloosan Dustdevils (a pair of cute earth-mares who wore cowboy hats in addition to their bikinis) versus the Baltimare Sentinels (twin unicorn sisters who seemed to amply fill their bikinis).
On the Western court was the Las Pegasus Cloud-clobberers… which included the former star Wonderbolt, Cloudkicker. The silvery-haired superstar had retired from the Wonderbolts the previous year and had been doing a whirlwind tour of various sports and races… most of which she was easily dominating in. She had a celebrity status second to none - with most of the tabloids speculating wildly on whether she would settle down in a herd soon… or even snag a superstar stallion husband of her own! She was playing with a lithe, little yellow pegasus, she looked like a rookie compared to the more experienced athlete… but the fire in her eyes showed that she was more than willing to keep up with her partner.
They were playing against two crystal ponies, a filly and colt unicorn, both of whom were clearly outmatched. It quickly became apparent from the spectacle that part of the competition included the opportunity for locals to try their skills against the best in the country… with predictable results. Even worse, these two seemed to be a younger pair - closer in age to Flurry Heart. The pegasi were playing to the crowd, toying with their opponent in a good-natured way and making them dive out into the sand over and over. From the growling between the two after each lost rally, it seemed like they were brother and sister… and neither seemed happy with their sibling’s performance in front of such a big crowd.
Shining turned back from the fields with a dopey grin on his face. But what he saw wiped that smile instantly: Flurry did not look happy.
“This was your idea?” Flurry asked with skepticism. Looking at the raucous crowds, her eyes lingered over the assortment of males, colts and stallions alike, who all seemed very excited every time one of the cute fillies or mares made a stretch or dive that would end with their string-bikinied plots sticking up in the air. “Dad… half of the colts there are sporting half-chubs… er… I mean… are over-excited… do you remember what my power lets me sense?”
Shining chewed his lip and cocked his head. “But… Cadence said that you’d have better control over your power ever since the classroom incident.”
Flurry sighed and pawed the ground. “I mean… yes… I feel better about it since then… but I still feel it… the uh… lust… all around me.”
“So? What’s the big deal then?” Shining shrugged, genuinely curious.
“What’s the big deal!?” Flurry crossed her arms. “It’s… lust! Like… y’know… lewd stuff, it’s bad!”
Shining clicked his tongue and shushed his daughter. “Hey now… I might be an idiot - but a wise mare once told me that there’s no such thing as bad love. And lust is just passionate love.” Shining looked right into Flurry’s eyes. He didn’t do it often, but he liked to think that he could pull off a sincere stare when he needed to. “Y’know Flurry, the hippogriffs have a bunch of different words for love… and one of them - eros, is the term for sexual love. It’s not bad just because we ponies have gotten a bit stodgy over the last few hundred years.”
Flurry cocked an eyebrow at him. “Wow, so mom has given you that little speech too, huh?
“Like a million times.” Shining rolled his eyes, muttering. “Usually before she tries to convince me to put something in my butt.”
“What?”
“Nothing!” Shining shook his head and snapped his mouth shut, quickly changing the subject. “I was just thinking, about this tournament. One of the things your mom and I used to do when we first started dating was to go around and use her love power to stop ponies from fighting, or to bring two lovers closer together, or to get a shy pony to finally confess his love to his crush.” Shining smiled as he remembered all the good times he’d had with his wife. “I remember her saying that it helped her to see the positive side of her power… how it made her realize how much good she could do.”
Flurry seemed suspicious, doubtful. But she as listening, drawing a circle in the turf with a hoof as she considered. “I… I guess…”
“I thought it might be fun if we tried it out!” Shining laughed. “You never know, we could be helping two passionately in love ponies finally get over their fears - you coming to the volleyball tournament might be the best day of their lives!”
Does Shining’s suggestion of watching volleyball with Flurry go over well (25% chance of failure)? Shining rolls… success! Flurry likes the idea!
Flurry grinned slightly. “I mean… it might be fun to do with you… you said you and mom used to do it together all the time, right?”
Shining nodded happily. “Sure! And the worst thing that could happen is we get to watch some awesome beach volleyball players… I used to be pretty good myself, you know?”
Flurry arched an eyebrow at that. “Oh really? You probably don’t know, but you’re in the presence of Crystal High’s top blocker.”
“Heh, maybe instead of watching we should go line up for a shot against those two pegasi hot-shots?” Shining joked. “Stormageddon and Skyla, the dynamic duo!”
The FLURRY HEART METER goes up by half a point!
Currently the meter is at 8.5 / 10!
1) Unknown/Unknown: Let’s go line up for a chance to face off against the pegasi. We can take them! Talk about father-daughter bonding: what could be better than taking home the challenger’s championship cup. (??? chance of failure - ??? reward)
2) Unknown/Unknown: Let’s go watch the two superstars from Las Pegasus! One’s a freaking celebrity! How cool would it be for Flurry to perhaps glean some insight as to who Cloudkicker was really into? Surely that would make her love her newfound abilities! (??? chance of failure - ??? reward)
3) Unknown/Unknown: Let’s go watch the siblings from the Crystal Empire. Sure they’re arguing with one another… but maybe there’s something Flurry could do to help them? Who knows what feelings they might have for each other? (??? chance of failure - ??? reward)
4) Unknown/Unknown: Let’s go watch those two cowgirls from Appaloosa! They say that girls from the south really know how to get worked up, especially once they get a good sweat going! And those hats are pretty darn tootin’ cute!(??? chance of failure - ??? reward)
Unknown/Unknown: What could be sexier than an athletic unicorn-mare who has bountiful, bouncing, big… prospects of winning? How about an identical twin sister!(??? chance of failure - ??? reward)
Author's Note
STRAW POLL HERE
Vote for your choice! Once we hit 250 total votes I'll write the next chapter!
Guys, you are AMAZINGLY AWESOME! I appreciate all of you who hit the thumbs up - it has really helped to get more people involved in this fun little experiment - thank you for being such a great bunch of active readers!
I'm travelling a bit for the remainder of the month, so you'll have to forgive me if my updates are a bit tighter and/or delayed. Work travel - nothing I could do about it!
That said, I will absolutely get this thing over the finish line (if you guys don't blow it with the choices!)
So you guys chose the park and the volleyball tournament... not a bad choice at all! But now you gotta choose who you wanna turn that powerful lust power on - or whether you should turn it onto anypony at all!
Are you going to make the right choice? Think hard - it may not be obvious!
As always, commented suggestions are also welcome and can end up becoming a new choice/outcome if good enough!
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