Walker flopped onto his cot; his ears perked back as he heard Seal sit lightly on his. Three days had passed, and Walker had successfully kept to three parts of the list. Every morning, midday, and evening, he and Seal would walk to the mess tent. Everyone knew to keep well clear, and they encountered no more soldiers, as well as no more spitting. They would then sit at a prearranged table, where Richardson and Phillips were waiting. Most meals they ate in silence, but sometimes the three would chatter, talking about camp life and other equally worthless information. Any time Walker tried to get information about the war outside the camp, Seal shut it down, stating that if Walker wanted to be involved, he had to complete the entire list. Walker eventually learned to eat in silence, never voicing his opinion on anything. He resented the pity he saw in Richardson’s eyes.

After the morning meal would come a morning jog. It wasn’t anything strenuous like a PT run, but it did warm Walker up slightly as they ran around the camp. It also had the added effect of getting him used to moving on four legs rather than two. He still wasn’t adept at getting himself up when he fell, but his new motor functions were slowly improving. The past few days had seen a thick wall of clouds roll overhead, covering the sun and bringing a sharp nip to the night air. Most nights found Walker shivering in his cot, unable to sleep due to a combination of his thoughts and the cold. He was too stubborn to ask for something to wear, so Walker got used to feeling cold and naked. At least his bait and tackle didn’t just dangle around where everyone could see.

By the afternoon, Walker felt drained, but Seal would drag him to medical tent so that Phillips could ask the same dozen questions each day. As he did so, he would take a blood sample, a skin (or was it chitin?) sample, and then a hair sample. When Walker asked about why he still had hair, the medic had no response. It was abnormality according to the information provided by the Equestrians, and it left Phillips scratching his head, especially since it was only a slightly different color from Walker’s human hair.

Once the medical exam was done, and the final meal of the day was over, Walker dragged his feet back to his tent, falling limply onto his cot. Seal always walked beside him, silent. He didn’t even speak when they would pass the tent where Celestia slept; no words of encouragement to fill out the list in its entirety, just a quiet promise to remain at Walker’s side until he did it of his own volition. This silent, watchful presence had two effects on Walker. The first was irritation bordering on rage. If Walker tried to deviate at all from the unofficial schedule, he was met by Seal steering him back on track, blocking him with the line that if he wanted to do something, he had to complete the list. The second effect was gratitude. Despite his best efforts to remain miserable, he was glad to move about, even if it was limited. Seal’s constant presence acted as a guard rail for Walker, a person to lean on when he needed to. Coupled with the routine meals with Richardson and Phillips, Walker felt a semblance of norm return to his life.

It left Walker feeling guilty as he realized why they were doing it, and why he was such an ass for treating them as he did. He just couldn’t quite suppress his anger, nor his sense of loss. He desperately wanted to apologize, but any time he attempted to do so his anger would flare up over something insignificant, or he would spiral into depression, laying on his side, unmoving, for hours. The only silver lining was the Seal didn’t say anything when Walker flew off the handle. He simply took the verbal abuse silently before either pushing Walker forward in an activity, or letting him calm down in bed.

After one such incident late at night, Walker flopped limply into bed, shivering as he felt tears stream down his cheeks once more. Seal sighed deeply, draping Walker’s blanket over him before settling on his own cot. That brought Walker to now, as he listened to Seal’s breathing, waiting for the man to go to sleep. Once it was deep enough, Walker slipped from beneath his blanket, rubbing at his face to wipe away the tears. He shivered as the cold touched his body, it had only gotten progressively colder over the last few days. Despite only being October, the weathermen were already calling for snow. An overall positive as it seemed that changelings couldn’t survive in colder climates, giving fresh opportunities for offensives against the bugs as they retreated south. Walker just wished he knew what the push would be; he hated being left in the dark.

There was only one solution to that, as Seal had made abundantly clear. Walker needed peace before he could act, however. He didn’t need support on the mission he had to embark on. It was one he had to succeed or fail at alone. He crept from the tent silently, doing his best to avoid getting near Seal as the man slept. Despite the dark, Walker could see just fine, something he had his loathsome new body to thank for. Despite their outward appearance, his eyes were much more adept at seeing in low-light than his human eyes had been, and despite himself, Walker was glad for the change. It made things easier, especially now.

He slipped out of the tent flap, his ears pinning themselves to the side of his head as the outside chill hit him in the face. The grey clouds above seemed still, and the camp felt virtually silent, an abnormality for an operational military camp. Walker trotted toward Celestia’s tent as quick as he could without looking odd. He still got glares, and Walker felt exposed without his normal escort. He received no harassment as he went though, so each step made him slightly more confident.

Until he was actually standing in front of the tent that was. Walker gulped nervously as he raised a hoof to knock on the piece of plywood that acted as a way to “knock” on the tent’s entrance. Now that he was standing here, the task seemed impossibly daunting. He had driven her away intentionally, had never taken up her offer to talk, and then had attempted an assisted suicide which she had only barely stopped. That look of anger… Would she even want to talk to him? Would she want to hear an apology, or had he destroyed whatever friendship they had irreparably?

Walker took a deep breath and knocked on the plank, waiting in the cold as he heard somebody stir in the tent. He was surprised when Princess Luna stuck her head out of the tent flap rather than Celestia. She glared at him with cold green eyes.

“What do you want changeling?”

Walker flinched at that. He couldn’t back down though, he had a job to do, even if it hurt.

“I-I was hoping to speak to Celestia,” he stammered fearfully. Luna was staring at him in a way that made him… nervous. Or was it a result of the cold? Walker didn’t know and he shrugged off the extraneous question. Princess Luna’s frown deepened.

“And what makes you think that she would interrupt her busy schedule to talk to the likes of you?” Luna said.

Walker flinched again, cringing under that withering, hateful glare.

“I-… I just thought I should come apologize. I k-know I’ve said some things, b-but I thought sh-she would like to h-hear an apology at least.”

The cold was getting deeper into his body now. Walker couldn’t stop his teeth from chattering, couldn’t keep the stutter from his voice. Luna smirked, then stepped out into the cold, unflinching as she towered to her full height.

“You have nothing to say to my sister changeling. Be gone from this place,” she said firmly.

Walker shivered; but he held his ground.

“S-she said to-to come talk with her,” Walker chattered. “A-and I-… I won’t leave until I’ve said I’m sorry.”

Princess Luna flared her wings out, and Walker couldn’t help but drop down a little, making the pony seem much more intimidating. She bared her teeth as she growled at him, her voice low as she spoke.

“Listen well bug, I care not for your apologies, and neither does Celestia. You have brought strife and disharmony to the lives of everyone here, and you have driven her to new lows I thought she could not reach. Your words mean nothing; not to me, not to Celestia, and not to anyone. You have no friends, you have no family, and you have no value. Whatever falsehoods your former subordinates have made you believe are just that, false. They do not care for you. They will never care for you.”

Walker flinched back, retreating a few steps. Princess Luna followed, stepping carefully as tears began to flow down his cheeks. Walker shook his head and tried to close his ears as she continued.

“You are a worthless, spineless, ugly, hated bug. You will never find happiness in your life, and you will find no solace here. In time, all will see you properly, as the disgusting creature you are. You are a wretch changeling. If you believe you can corrupt my sister, then you are sorely mistaken.”

She rose to her full height, her wings fully spread as she finished.

“Now begone from this place, do not return, or I will personally make you suffer for the rest of your valueless life.”

Walker whimpered softly, before turning on his heels and running away from the blue princess. He ran not toward the safety tent, but toward the latrines, where he knew there was a hole in the fence. An escape. It remained unobserved, and it was the only place Walker knew to run.

He ignored the sensation of pain as the fence scraped his back as he scrambled under the metal chain links and out into the dark trees. As he ran, snow began to fall.

*****

“Who was it Luna?” Celestia asked as her sister came back into their shared tent.

Celestia was laying on her stomach, her eyes gazing deadly at the paperwork before her. She was saddened that Cornelius had not yet decided to pay her a visit, but she knew that he would, given more time. He was proud as a human, and that pride, along with all of his accomplishments, were ripped away when he became something he had fought so hard against. To see a friend brought so low was painful to bear, but Celestia knew that in time, she could get Cornelius back on his feet, get him back to the brave soldier she had known for far too short a time.

Luna laid down gracefully onto her pillow bed.

“Twas nothing sister, merely a guard delivering a report from the gate. A minor disturbance, nothing more.”

“Was anyone hurt?” Celestia asked, concern rising in her voice.

Luna smiled and shook her head.

“Nay ‘Tia, just a simple wrong that needed righting. Nothing to worry about.”

Celestia frowned at the ambiguous language, but she shrugged it off. She trusted her sister completely, even if they sometimes differed in opinion. Celestia didn’t understand her sister’s profound hatred for Cornelius, but she knew that, that too, would fade in time. Luna smiled at her and shifted closer so that they were pressed together, sharing the warmth of each other’s company. Luna rested her head on Celestia’s back.

“Sleep now sister, all will still be well in the morning. There is nothing more to do this night.”

Celestia sighed, resting her chin against the pillows below her.

“Of course, Luna, I just worry is all.”

She felt Luna smile.

“Save the worrying for the ‘morrow sister. Even you need rest.”

Celestia felt a slight smile touch her lips as she nodded silently in agreement, gently pulling her sister closer. Even with the enchantments to their tent, the chill air still touched everything. It would certainly be a cold night.

*****

Seal woke with a start, the dream he had been having shattered as a chill ran up his spine. The man sat up, rubbing his arms fiercely as he tried to ward of the cold of the air. He had gone to sleep warm, with nothing covering his body, but now he definitely needed a blanket. And if he needed something…

Seal looked over to the cot next to him, and was surprised to find it empty. Seal rolled out of his cot and placed a hand on the empty space, finding it very cold, like it had been unoccupied for some time. Seal got to his feet, habitually grabbing his rifle as walked out the tent. His breath came out in a fog as he looked into the night air, colored only with the bright lamps of the camp that made the snow fall dance in the dark.

Seal checked the ground for check for tracks, but found none leading from the tent, meaning Walker had left before it began snowing. Seal checked his watch; 10:30. Dipping back into the tent briefly, Seal came out in a thick jacket. It was only going to get colder, and if Walker was out in it… Seal didn’t think about that, instead focusing his mind to piece together where the man turned changeling went.

Seal started by finding Phillips and Richardson, rousing them from their rest as he threw their tent flaps open widely, letting the vaguely warm air slip out.

“Have either of you seen Walker?” he asked as they sat up, rubbing at their bleary eyes. Phillips was the first to respond.

“Not since dinner. Why? Wasn’t he with you?”

Seal grimaced.

“He was, but he left the tent while I was sleeping. Hasn’t been there in some time.”

Richardson didn’t say anything as he began slipping his boots on. Seal looked at the man in confusion.

“What are you doing Private?”

The man’s eyes glistened in the light as they stared at Seal.

“The Colonel’s missing Captain, you think I’m going to sit around and wait until he’s found? No, all this shit we’ve been doing the last couple days is as real for me as it is for you. He’s been hurting real bad, and I’m thinking he ran off because he tried to finish that list you’ve been pushing at him and something went wrong. You saw those looks he’s been having. He wants to work, and you’ve been locking that down behind one thing.”

Seal nodded. That made a lot of sense. It explained why Walker snuck out, as well as why he hadn’t come back. If he believed that he would be rejected… Phillips followed Richardson’s lead and flipped his leg out, tugging on a pair of pants, followed by his boots and jacket. Seal looked back to Richardson, who was already pulling on his jacket.

“Private, Sergeant, gather as many men as you can that are willing and friendly to Colonel Walker as possible. Hopefully Private Richardson is wrong, but I have a nasty feeling he isn’t. We’ll need a search party, but I only want friendly faces who won’t try to shoot the colonel on sight.”

Richardson nodded as he grabbed his rifle and helmet.

“Where do you want to meet up with us?” he asked.

“By Walker’s tent, we’ll start from there if my lead doesn’t pan out.”

Richardson nodded, and Seal quickly strode from the tent, his pace breaking into a jog as he made his way toward Princess Celestia’s tent. Seal slammed his fist into the tent “knocker” and then barged his way in, not waiting for a response. Princess Celestia and Princess Luna both raised their heads as he entered, their expressions drowsy, yet attentive.

“Mhm, what is it Captain?” Princess Luna asked. “Is there an attack?”

Seal shook his head.

“No, I’m looking for Colonel Walker. He hasn’t been in the tent for some time and nobody has seen him. I thought I would check here before sending out a search party.”

Celestia quickly untangled herself from her sister as she got to her feet.

“No, we have only had a guard visit, but Luna took care of it. Do you have any idea why he would run away? I thought he was beginning to show positive signs of recovery.”

Seal nodded as he ran his tongue over his teeth. His eyes were on the blue princess, who was working hard to look nonchalant while also avoiding his eyes.

“He was Princess, in fact, I would even say he had made it to a point where he would come to talk to you. Unless of course, somebody barred his path.”

Princess Celestia followed his eyes to her sister.

“Luna? Did you see Cornelius?”

Princess Luna sniffed and looked toward her sister; her chin high.

“I have not sister. As I said, it twas only a guard reporting a minor disturbance at the front gate.”

Seal smelled BS.

“A disturbance huh? Why don’t you give me the guard’s name Princess? I can check to see if this disturbance is truly minor.”

She looked at him in panic.

“I-I don’t think that’s necessary Captain. You have a search to conduct after all.”

Princess Celestia was now staring at her sister in shock, while Seal was pointedly glaring at the blue pony.

“Luna, what did you do?”

Princess Luna looked at her sister.

“Please Tia, it was for your own good!” she said, her tone desperate. “I merely said what we all believed, and my effort was successful, the waiting danger in our camp is no longer!”

Seal felt the temperature in the tent rise dramatically. Waves of heat seemed to radiate off of Princess Celestia as her fury grew. Seal stepped in before the pony exploded in rage. When he put his hand on her shoulder, she glared at him, but Seal remained firm.

“Princess, we don’t have time for anger. It’s snowing out there, and I went through that packet page by page. If Walker is out there, he could be dead within an hour, and I don’t know how long he’s been gone.”

The anger faded in her eyes, moving from an inferno to a simmer. Seal continued.

“We are working against the clock, and the longer we wait, the farther he gets and the less chance we have of bringing him back alive. I need you to focus on that, and let anger come later.”

Princess Celestia nodded, and Seal took a step back as she began putting on her armor. Seal then turned back to Princess Luna, his anger returning in full force. She flinched under the heat of his glare.

“I-I can make this right!” she said. “Let me help with the search, I can-..”

Seal cut her off with a raised hand.

“The only way you can make this right, is by telling me which way he ran, and then staying out of the way. The search party will consist only of those who still see the man, not the bug, and you have more than proven that you do not.”

Princess Luna’s eyes fell, and Seal could see a tear drop. Princess Celestia crouched near her sister, her armor already on fully.

“Luna, this is a nearly unforgivable act, but one that I will forgive you for if you simply help us save him. Please.”

Princess Luna looked up at her older sister, her eyes tearful. She wrapped her sister in a tight hug, sobbing as she pointed out the tent.

“He ran toward the latrines! I did not seem him leave. Please sister, I am sorry! I did not seek to hurt you, I only sought to keep you safe!”

Princess Celestia sighed, returning the hug as she comforted the sobbing pony. She looked to Seal, and he nodded, departing the tent as he marked where he would go first.

With a whistle, Seal waved over the dozen or so men waiting outside of his tent. They ran over, and fell in line with Seal as he walked quickly toward the latrines. He was surprised to see one face among the group; he hadn’t seen the man in days. Still, he didn’t have time for idle chatter, they had a job to do. Seal turned around, walking backwards as he addressed the men.

“Alright, here’s the situation. Colonel Walker has been driven out by a hostile party. Considering the swiftness of his departure, I would assume he has been emotionally cracked, if not broken entirely. He may not be looking for help, making our job harder. You will have to be looking hard to find him, and as it stands, this may already be a retrieval op. He’s been dangerously exposed to the cold, and there is no telling how far he’s gotten.”

Seal paused, noting the grim expressions facing him.

“That won’t stop us from trying. Should you find him, getting him warm is the number one priority. He’s a bit smaller, so putting him in your jacket should do the trick. Be cautious approaching him, as he may resist help, but be forceful enough and he’ll get over it.”

Seal glanced over his shoulder, saw the latrines fast approaching. He turned back to the men.

“He was last seen running in this direction. One man will remain behind to check each latrine, and then remain here in case Walker comes back. Cook, that’s on you.”

Princess Celestia sprinted into the rear of the group, falling in as Seal continued without a hitch.

“Everyone else will be hopping the fence with me to search outside. Though he hasn’t demonstrated a willingness to do so, he has wings and has the potential to fly. Hoping a fence would be a breeze, and all likelihood, that’s what he did. We’ll conduct a short search in here and then go outside, keeping at the edges of radio range to get a wide pattern. Clear?”

Everyone nodded. Seal spun back around so that he was walking straight again.

“Then let’s get to work.”

*****

Walker shivered violently as he plodded forward, his eyes facing the ground. He had no idea where he was walking to, and he didn’t much care. Luna’s words had cut to his core, confirming every dark thought that he had been slowly pushing at for days. The wind was at a howl now, and snow was plastered to his wings and his hair. Even his tears had begun freezing on his face. Walker pressed on however; he knew he had no place behind him.

Walker stumbled into a clearing, a creek splitting it down the middle. Before he could even approach the flowing water, he fell limply into an already formed snowbank, the cold finally claiming his legs as they became too cold to move. The snow burned against his face, but Walker didn’t care as he curled into a ball, trying his best to stay warm. As he rubbed at his legs, Walker heard someone cackle, the voice piercing through the wind. He weakly lifted his head to see a tall changeling standing there, her green eyes shining in the darkness. Her teeth widened as she noticed Walker staring at her.

“What did I tell you drone? Did I not say you would die, suffering and alone? No friends to speak of? This was the fate I promised you, was it not?” she cackled madly, walking forward until she was pressed against his side.

Walker felt no heat radiate from her body, if anything, he felt colder. Walker pressed deeper into the snow, trying to escape the feeling of her chitinous body pressing against his. She smiled down at him.

“Ah, poor stupid drone. Worthless to any and all. At least at my side you could have been something, but now? Look at you. Cold and alone. Pathetic.”

Walker placed a hoof over his ears as he closed his eyes.

“Go away,” he whimpered. “You’re not real.”

That made her laugh harder.

“Of course I’m not real you simpering idiot! I am merely in your head and that’s what makes this all the worse, doesn’t it?”

She leaned close. Walker could almost feel her sharp teeth on his neck, or was that the biting cold of the snow?

“Despite what anyone tries to make you think, I will always be waiting, always making sure that nobody cares for you. And in truth, my job is already finished, because nobody does. I just wanted your last moments to be suffering.”

Walker whimpered, curling as tightly as he could as she began cackling again. Through his eyelids, Walker thought he saw a flash of light. The changeling’s laughing ceased as Walker cracked open his eyes, searching out the light, a flicker of hope in his chest. The changeling glared down at him.

“Nobody is coming for you Walker. Nobody values you enough.”

Walker shivered as he tried to push himself up, but his numb hooves slipped on the slick ground and he fell on his side into the snowdrift once more. He saw a beam of light cut through the trees, and he weakly tried to raise a forehoof, his voice catching in his throat as the cold seemed to seep deeper. The changeling pressed on his chest, making his heart beat slower.

“Die Walker, do the world a favor and die,” the bug growled. “It is what you want, it is what everyone wants. Just sink back into the snow, and die.”

Walker felt his eyes droop. He couldn’t fight the changeling, she was too strong, and he was so cold. The light moved closer now, and Walker felt it briefly brush over his body. He tried to call out, only managing a squeak as his chest tightened. The changeling on top of him growled, pressing down harder. Walker couldn’t find his breath, could feel a warm sensation creeping up his legs.

“Die damn you! You are an unloved freak!” the changeling shrieked in his ears. “Die!”

The light came back as Walker shifted again, and the changeling disappeared. Walker faintly heard footsteps crunching in the snow as the man approached. He was rolled forcefully out of the snow as his rescuer scooped him up. Walker put up no fight. He couldn’t even feel his legs, or much of his torso.

Suddenly, Walker found himself feeling very warm, the cold disappearing as he was pressed tightly into somebody’s body, their jacket zipping closed behind him. Walker couldn’t work up the effort to be embarrassed, just snuggled closer to the warmth as he smiled happily, his pony-bug instincts taking over while his mind struggled to recover. His ear’s flicked as he heard the man say;

“I’ve got him Captain. Let’s head home.”

Walker cracked open his eyes as he looked at the man that was carrying him like a lost puppy. He was mildly surprised to see that it was Sergeant White, a man that had made a point of avoiding him. White looked down, saw the changeling staring back and put on a fake smile.

“Don’t worry Colonel, we’re going to make sure you’re alright.”

Walker blinked before sinking back against the man’s chest, sighing softly. Despite the fact that he very much shouldn’t be so comfortable being so physically close with one of his soldiers, Walker couldn’t find it within himself to care. Instead, he simply sat, relishing in the heat pouring off the man’s body as he walked briskly, one hand under Walker, keeping him within the jacket.

As his limbs began to warm, Walker shifted slightly, moving to a more comfortable position. When he had been shoved into the jacket, all four of his legs had been pinned against White’s chest, but now, as feeling came back, Walker began to feel slightly cramped. Additionally, the sharp ends of his hooves would occasionally stab into White’s side, making the man grunt. So, to fix both of their discomforts, Walker shifted so that one of his forelegs was free, while the other three wrapped around White’s body loosely, acting as a method by which Walker could hold on. As he adjusted, Walker noticed something missing on White’s jacket sleeve.

Drowsily he asked;

“Sergeant, where is your ring?”

The man seemed startled by the question, and he shifted his shoulder, a sign to Walker that he knew exactly what Walker was talking about.

“What ring sir? I’m not married,” White responded, trying his best not to look down at the changeling sticking out his jacket.

Walker ran his tongue across his teeth, trying not to wince when he almost stabbed it on a fang.

“Sergeant do not play dumb with me. Where is your ring?” He sniffed, sneezing softly.

Walker growled at his pony-like cuteness. He was a soldier damnit, not a puppy.

The man shifted his weight, but remained silent, staring straight ahead as he walked. Walker huffed, thinking how he could pry an answer from the man. He had observed the ponies doing something that seemed effective, and hell, his eyes were still normal, it might be an effective tool if he was going to be stuck looking like a pony-bug.

Walker shifted his head so that it was directly below White’s chin.

“Sergeant look at me,” he said forcefully.

White looked down, and Walker did his best impression of pony-puppy dog eyes, widening them as he produced some tears. On top of that, he stuck out his bottom lip and whimpered softly. White sighed and looked up.

“Sir, I don’t think that’s appropriate.”

His voice was unconvincing. His eyes would flick down every few seconds. Walker knew he had him, he just needed to try harder. Imitating a cat, Walker lightly kneaded the man’s chest as he let out a louder whimper, spreading his eyes as wide as possible to sucker the man in.

Walker felt a bit happier when it worked. His tail wagged slightly, as White sighed, looking down at him.

“It’s gone Colonel.” White said, his voice tinged with sadness. “I gave it back to Captain Armor after what happened at Overlord.”

Walker stewed in silence for a moment, his mind still extremely fuzzy. Thinking was a chore right now, but he was sure he could press through, find the issue, and solve it. He looked up at White, then an idea popped into his head.

“Tell me what happened at Overlord Sergeant, when you found me. I don’t remember much.”

White sighed.

“Well, your transmissions had been coming through to us the whole time,” he started. “We tracked your progress, Princess Celestia tracked your conversion. She kept… talking to herself, listing the symptoms over and over as she planned to save you. From the beginning Colonel, she was getting ready to make sure you made it out.”

White sighed again.

“I wish I had her loyalty.”

Walker snorted, leaning into the man’s chest, listening to his heart thud away.

“Sergeant, I have no doubt in my mind that you do. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t be carrying me right now. Continue.”

White didn’t look down as he spoke, and Walker knew that he was avoiding looking at Walker. In truth, Walker could relate to that. He still hadn’t looked at himself fully, hadn’t read the packet of symptoms to expect. If he expected to do anything of substance again, he would need to be fully briefed on everything and anything changeling. Perhaps even visit other partial converts to see how they coped. Walker frowned as he thought, listening to White at the same time.

“When you began to sound disorientated, like the changelings were getting to you, I began to prepare for…” White fell silent, and Walker looked up to see tears falling.

Walker cocked his head as he watched the tears stream down White’s face. His mind briefly whispered that the man was crying for a reason. It took his cold addled brain a second to figure out why. When it did, everything clicked, and Walker felt a brief moment of mental clarity.

“You feel guilty for trying to kill me before I turned. That’s why you gave the ring back,” Walker said simply, looking up to White.

The man stopped walking, and Walker felt the man’s chest heave under his hooves. Tears poured down now as a sob escaped White.

“Sir, I gave the ring back because I don’t deserve it. I tried to kill you Colonel, I tried to shoot you when Princess Celestia and Shining Armor said they had a solution, and I was so stupid and couldn’t get it through my head that they might have been right. I was apparently the only one who had an answer, and that answer was to kill you.”

Walker felt a flicker of irritation cut through the haze in his head.

“Sergeant, you had no way of knowing what would happen, and regardless, you didn’t pull the trigger. You are punishing yourself for an action you didn’t commit.”

“Sir, you don’t get it. Shining Armor wouldn’t even look at me. Nobody would. Why should they? I tried to kill you when everyone else said you would be fine.” White shook his head and began walking again. “I’m valueless Colonel. I’m just some idiot who can’t tell who his friends are. That makes me a liability.”

Walker sighed as the words White said drifted through his head, sounding awfully similar to what Walker had said to Celestia. Walker flattened his ears as he heard himself repeat a line she had said to him before he drove her away.

“No Sergeant, you’re merely human. You made a mistake. You shouldn’t let one moment ruin your life.”

White sniffed, wiping away his tears.

“It doesn’t matter sir. What’s done is done. There’s no going back.”

Walker frowned.

“Sergeant, while true, that doesn’t mean there is no going forward. You need to go talk to Shining Armor, and you need to get that ring back.”

White sighed and shook his head, pressing forward.

“No sir. It’s done. I can’t make him happy any more than I could be a good soldier for you. I’ve failed both of you, and nobody wants a failure.”

Walker’s frown deepened as anger began rising to the front of his mind, the fog parting momentarily as the anger built.

“Sergeant, you have failed nobody.”

White snorted.

“Respectfully sir, you’re wrong. I failed you as a Sergeant by failing to follow your orders and by failing to trust your judgement. I failed you and everyone else as a friend by failing to trust anyone. I didn’t listen and it very nearly got you killed. If Captain Walker wasn’t there… you may well have been.”

Walker cocked his head, his ears flopping with the motion.

“Did I die Sergeant?”

White sighed.

“Sir, that’s not the point.”

“Except that it is Sergeant. I already said this, but you are punishing yourself for an action you didn’t commit. If anything was worth punishing, would somebody else not have already begun punishing you?” Walker asked.

“Sir, just because nobody punished me, doesn’t mean I’m free of guilt. I failed and that’s that,” White said firmly, his face setting into a hard grimace as he refused to look down at Walker.

Walker frowned, staring at White’s shoulder as he tried to push his mind to find a solution. The conversation had become cyclical, and therefore, pointless. He needed a solution. As he combed through a well of half-baked ideas, a thought hit him. Why was he talking about this? Everyone still called him Colonel, so that had to mean he had some authority, right? Walker grinned smugly before rotating himself to face outward.

“Sergeant, stop walking forward,” he ordered.

He could feel a confused glance from White, but the man ignored the order.

“Sir, we’re still pretty far from camp, now really isn’t the time.”

Walker raised an eyebrow, glancing over his shoulder at the man.

“I don’t believe I asked Sergeant. Cease your movement and prepare for further orders. If you refuse, I will find a punishment suitable to your crime.”

White slowed to a stop, and Walker could practically feel the confusion emanating from him.

“Sir, my crime?”

Walker raised his nose snootily in the air.

“Insubordination Sergeant, now release me so that I can dress you down properly.”

“Sir, I really don’t think now is th-..” White protested, but Walker cut in, his voice at a shout.

“Now Sergeant! Do not force me to repeat myself!”

White unzipped his jacket in one motion, and Walker was woefully unprepared to catch himself as he fell face first into the snow. He snorted out the wet dust as he immediately regretted his decision to leave the warm comfort of White’s jacket, but he couldn’t show weakness now. He needed to be an officer first, then he could act like a bug-pony. If he didn’t nip this in the bud now, White may well break under the guilt, and that was something Walker wouldn’t allow; bug or not. Walker got to his feet shakily, his legs slightly numb from their compression, but he did his best. He straightened to his full height; a good foot or two shorter than Sergeant White. The man looked down at him in obvious confusion and concern. Walker ran his tongue across his teeth.

“I don’t believe I need to tell you what attention looks like Sergeant,” Walker set firmly, trying to hide his shiver as the cold crept back in.

White snapped to, his arms flat against his body while his eyes stayed forward. Walker pretended to not notice the occasional glance down. He began pacing back and forth, his mind conjuring phantom images of his hands behind his back.

“Sergeant, listen carefully, because I will only give these orders once. You will follow them to the letter. Any less, and I promise you, whatever guilt you may feel now will be immeasurable to the guilt you feel when I dive headfirst into a frozen creek because of your disobedience. A man concerned with self-punishment and guilt is of no use to me, and I will no longer tolerate your shabby performance.”

White looked down at Walker like he was insane. His mouth began to open to speak, but Walker cut that off instantly.

“Remain at attention Sergeant!” Walker shouted.

White stiffened, his eyes remaining forward this time. Walker exhaled deeply, his mind coming online as he laid out his “orders” for White.

“Your first order Sergeant, is to stop feeling guilty.”

The man looked like he wanted to protest, but he wisely didn’t as Walker fixed him with a glare. When the man continued remaining still and silent, Walker grinned lightly and continued.

“This will be the final time I say this; you have nothing to be guilty for. It was the bugs and the bugs alone that did this to me. I don’t blame you, I don’t blame Seal, and I don’t blame Celestia.”

‘Though I have made an ass of myself coming to that conclusion,’ Walker thought.

Continuing, Walker said;

“If there is anyone here to blame Sergeant, it would be me for being so blindly stupid. I fell into every trap placed before me, and for that arrogance, I got my just dessert.”

White’s eyes flickered down.

“Sir I-“

Walker cut him off, hopping into the air to catch the man’s eyes.

“You’ll follow that order Sergeant; because despite what you think, you haven’t failed, neither as a Sergeant nor as a friend. I did not give an express order to shoot me should this,” he said gesturing at his body, “come to pass. I said, “I wished”, and that’s not an order. Second, you didn’t fail as a friend because it turns out that a certain tall white pony might be smart enough to tell when I make a poor decision. A monumental task since I’m never wrong, but she managed to figure it out.”

That brought a small smile to White’s face. Walker felt his heart lift slightly. He knew he was starting to get through, but now he to push hard to ensure it all stuck. Walker paused momentarily as he caught his breath. Being exposed in the cold was having an effect again, and his stupid changeling lungs weren’t helping. Walker lamented the loss of his human lungs, which could talk for hours uninterrupted. He sighed internally, making a note to work on his oratory skills. Back to the task at hand, however.

Walker made sure he caught White’s eyes firmly before he began again. This next part was important, and he needed to convey the power behind the order, even if he likely had no such power. White waited expectantly, and Walker saw a bit of nervousness there as well, likely a result of Walker’s tendency to snap back and forth between emotions. It wasn’t his fault his mind was getting fuzzy again.

“Your second order,” Walker began, “is that you are going to go up to Captain Armor, you are going to tell him about our little discussion here,” Walker jabbed a hoof into White’s chest, “you’re going to tell him everything you told me, and then you’re going to apologize and ask for that ring back.”

White looked like he wanted to protest again, but Walker cut him off once more, waggling a hoof in front of his face.

“Don’t you dare try and wiggle out of this either Sergeant. I’ve watched you two work; you operate like a seagull’s asshole when it’s eaten laxatives. Smoothly.”

White bit his lip as he tried not to smile. Walker grinned.

“These are your orders Sergeant, now you’re going to tell me that you’re going to follow them.” Walker tilted his head to the side, looking out into the darkness. “Or, should you decide not to, I’ll make your guilt real and bolt. I can guarantee that I will be far enough from camp to freeze to death with ease. Then you will have a reason to feel bad.”

Walker spun back around, ignoring the numbness on his face and feet as he looked at White, a smug smile on his face.

“So, what’s it going to be Sergeant? Are we going back together? Or am I going for the coldest jog of the rest of my life?”

The man seemed to think for a second. Walker shivered as a particularly nasty gust of wind blew past, going straight through the holes in his legs. Walker was really beginning to regret coming out here, but he steeled his mind. He needed to persevere, for White’s sake. White looked down at Walker, who stared defiantly back. The man smiled, and Walker could tell the expression was genuine.

“Alright sir, I’ll carry out your orders.”

Walker hopped up and down in victory, a smile on his face. He felt ridiculous doing the motion, but a small part of his brain said that it was a natural happy reaction, so Walker didn’t stop until White held a finger in the air.

“On one condition Colonel.”

Walker froze as he hit the ground, tensed as his eyes narrowed at White. The man’s smile was still present, and Walker had a feeling what the man was going to say.

“Only for the sake of humoring you Sergeant, what is this condition?” Walker asked cautiously.

White spread his hands.

“Sorry sir, but if you’re going to issue orders like those, you’re going to need something similar in return. I know I haven’t been around, but I’ve heard enough. You need to get back up, get back to work. I’ll follow your orders only if I know more will soon follow. Only if you resume your position in its entirety.”

Walker sighed.

“Sergeant, I’m not sure that will be entirely possible. I haven’t made contact with command; I’ve alienated most of the troops… I’ve driven away my friends,” Walker said glumly, looking at the snow beneath his hooves. “Who’s going to want me back now? Nobody, that’s who.”

“Maybe, but how did you say it sir?” White said, gazing mockingly upward as if in deep thought. He snapped his fingers. “Ah yes, “that doesn’t mean there’s no going forward”. Your exact words, sir.”

Walker glared at the man. White shrugged.

“I don’t think I have to point out that I was part of a search party for you sir. That means somebody still cares, and honestly, that’s a good start point.”

The man grinned smugly.

“Besides, if you want to play the guilt trip game, I can take a nice seat against the tree over there. Maybe take off my jacket, let my feet breathe for a minute. It’s so interesting that a human can die from exposure just like a changeling, isn’t it sir?”

White was mocking him. Unfortunately, he was right, and if Walker refused, he would be refusing the same logic he used to bring White back. Walker huffed, throwing a hoof up in defeat.

“Fine!” he shouted into the wind. “I’ll try to get my job back! You win Sergeant! Happy?”

White smiled.

“That I am sir. It’s good to have you back. I think this was just the thing we both needed to get up again.”

Walker shivered violently.

“Let’s not make a habit of it,” He mumbled. His teeth began to chatter again, and now with the crisis past, his mind began to slip once more as the cold crept in from all sides. White said something that Walker didn’t hear. His eyes looked out into the dark, searching for nothing. He felt hypnotized by the snowfall, and he didn’t notice White approach until it was too late.

White grabbed him with both hands, though this time Walker had enough strength and focus to put up a mild fight as he tried to wiggle free.

“Put me down Sergeant! I can walk on my own.”

White stuffed him into his jacket once again, zipping it tightly closed.

“No sir. We’re still almost a mile from camp, and you’re already freezing again. I’m in command until we’re back where it’s warm.”

Walker opened his mouth to protest, but found whatever words he wanted to say consumed by a yawn. Without anything to focus on, the pony-bug instincts he had managed to repress returned in full force. Walker snuggled close to White’s chest as the man began to move again. It didn’t take long for Walker, his mind finally calm, and his body warm, to fall asleep.

Author's Note

Just a note, but I will be editing some of the previous chapters (because boy are they rough.) Nothing significant to the plot his changing, but a multitude of mistakes and style changes are being fixed, so if anyone wishes to read a better version (or point out more mistakes I missed) I welcome you to do so!