The Time I was Reincarnated as a Dragon

(Johann POV)

I could feel a bright and gentle warmth on my face stirring me from my nap. I stretched my paws out in front of me and stretched my limbs while curling my back up. I let out a low yawn before smacking my lips and opening my eyes. The sun was still out, and when I turned to the clock to see the time, I could see that only four hours had gone by, making it roughly one o’clock. I was about to get started on the evening chores when I noticed something odd. I turned to look back to the clock on top of the fireplace, which looked higher up than usual. That wasn’t the only thing that was off. For some reason, everything in the cottage looked bigger: the birdhouse that hung from the ceiling, the couch I was laying on. I hopped off the couch to look around and noticed that something was off with me. I couldn’t feel my wings and tail felt lighter for some reason. I looked back to see if something was wrong, and boy was there something wrong. “My wings are gone!!” And they were gone, but that wasn’t the only thing that was different. Instead of having smooth black scales, I had short black fur, and my tail was thinner and fluffy. I looked down at my paws and saw that, instead of them being dragon paws, they were cat paws. “I’m a fucking cat!?”

My mind was racing for an answer on how this could have happened. I remember before I fell asleep that I was a dragon, that much I was positive on. So the only question now was how the heck did this happen, and is there a way to undo it?

While I was having my mini panic attack, I felt a tapping on my shoulder and turned to look to whoever it could have been. Much to my surprise, it was a familiar face, however this face was now on nearly the same scale as myself; it was Angel Bunny. “Oi, look buddy, some of us are trying to get some sleep around here, so do you think you can keep it down?”

I had so many questions running through my head before I tried to snap myself back to reality. “Angel, is that really you?” I asked in disbelief.

He cocked his head to the side, looking rather perplexed. “That’s my name, but how did you know? I don’t recognize you.” He started to hop around me as he took in my form.

“It's me, Johann, the dragon. You know, the one that has been living with Fluttershy for the last couple of weeks?”

It took him a moment before his eyes widened in surprise. “Holy cow! Johann? Is that really you?” He asked in surprise. I nodded my head, happy that he knew who I was. “What in the world happened to you?! Weren’t you a dragon earlier?”

I nodded and sighed as I looked at my new cat paws. “I was, but the next thing I know, I wake up, and suddenly I’m a freaking cat!” I sat on my haunches, taking in my form and tried my best not to panic. “I sure hope I didn’t die again and got reincarnated as a cat.” I looked to Angel, who had a look of confusion on his face before I waved my paw. “Long story.”

He shrugged his shoulders before thumping his foot on the ground while crossing his arms over his chest to think. “Hmm. Okay, tell me what you did before you went to sleep earlier today.” I thought back to the events that had transpired before I took my nap and told him everything I did, which wasn’t much as all I did was pick up Apple Bloom, drop her off at Zecora’s, and then came back here to finish the morning chores before going to sleep. Once I had finished my rundown of my day, Angel paced around the room before his ears perked up. “Wait, did you say you went to Zecora’s?” I nodded my head. “Okay, quick question. On the way there or back, did you happen to touch a blue flower?”

I do remember running into such flowers on the way back. “Yeah, actually. I found a whole bed of blue flowers. They seemed pretty. Why do you ask?”

“Did you touch any of them?” he asked, sounding a bit worried, and when I nodded my head, he facepalmed and groaned. “Those were Poison Joke flowers!”

My eyes widened and I was starting to freak out when he said the word “poison”. “P-Poison?! Are you saying I’m gonna die…again?!” I could feel my heart starting to race as the idea of dying a second time was starting to settle into my mind.

However, before I could go into a full-blown panic attack, Angel slapped me across the face with his paw. It didn’t hurt, but it did get me to stop freaking out. “Get ahold of yourself. You’re not gonna die. Despite the word ‘poison’ being in the name, it’s not lethal. That’s where the whole joke part comes in. All it does is pull pranks on you. Usually it changes something about you, and in this case, it turns you from a dragon into a cat.” This definitely eased my worries; I had just gotten used to having a dragon body now. “There is a cure, but I don’t know what it is. Fluttershy would know since something like this happened to her and her friends.”

This was something new. I don’t recall Fluttershy telling me about this. “She has? You mean the same thing happened to her?” Now that I was thinking about it, I tried to imagine Fluttershy as a little cat. I couldn’t help but smile as I can imagine her as a cute little kitten with yellow fur and pink paws. She would look so cute.

“Nah, Poison Joke has its own unique effect on everypony. For example, when it got to Fluttershy, her voice got so deep, she sounded like a stallion.” It took all my willpower to not burst into laughter. Now I had an idea why Fluttershy kept this a secret. I’d be lying if I said I wouldn’t feel the same way if I sounded like a girl.

“So, are you sure you don’t know the cure? Maybe there is somepony I could go talk to who may know.” Before he could answer, the door to the cottage suddenly slammed open. This caused me and Angel to jolt up as we turned to see who it was that just barged in.

“Hey, sis!!” Standing in the doorway was a pegasus stallion with a light puke green coat and blonde mane tied up in a messy bun. “Yo sis, where you at?” the stallion called out as he entered the house while carrying in what looked to be luggage.

“Two questions. One: did that guy call Fluttershy ‘sis’? And two: why do I have the growing urge to strangle him?” I wasn’t joking either when I asked Angel Bunny. Something about this guy made both my skin crawl and my blood boil all in the span of thirty seconds.

Letting out a disappointed sigh while dragging his paw down his face, Angel glared at the stallion. “That’s because he’s Fluttershy’s brother, Zephyr Breeze. And trust me when I say you’re not the only one who gets like that when first meeting this guy.” Both me and Angel jumped out of the way when the guy passed through us and dropped his stuff on the floor. “He’s a total loser who acts like he can do whatever he likes. Goes to college to work on manes or some shit, I don’t know.”

“Well, if his own mane is to go by anything, I’d say he is most definitely failing.” I couldn’t help but glare at this guy, and I don’t usually hate someone for no reason. But this guy just screams “I’m a douche” the moment he walked in through the door. “So why is he here, then? Is he on break or something?”

Angel could only shrug. “Don’t know, and I don’t care. Listen, he’s gonna be nothing but trouble if we don’t get him out of here ASAP.” Angel pretended like he was rolling up some imaginary sleeves as he started to march toward Zephyr.

“Whoa, hang on.” I pulled the little rabbit back by his tail before he did something he was gonna regret. “I’m not sure how bad this guy is, but he’s still Fluttershy’s brother. We can’t just go attacking him for no good reason.” I let go of his tail and tried to calm him down. “Look, why don’t I go try and talk to him and see why he’s here? I’m sure it’s for a good reason.”

“Psh, I’d love to see you try. I’m gonna go make some popcorn while I watch this trainwreck.” Angel hopped away, leaving me to deal with Fluttershy’s brother myself.

I followed Zephyr as he made his way to the kitchen. He walked over to the fridge and started rummaging through it. When I reached the kitchen table, I hopped onto the top and cleared my throat. “Pardon me. Sorry, but could you explain to me why you are here?” Zephyr raised his head and looked over to me. “Now, I don’t mean to sound rude, but Fluttershy didn’t mention you coming over, and while I’m not in my usual dragon form, I’m still in charge of watching over this house.”

“Daw, who’s a pretty kitty?” He cooed as he got closer.

“Excuse you?” I asked while cocking my head back. “Look, buddy, I’m not sure why you’re here, but let’s get something straight here. Fluttershy left me in charge of her house. Meaning you have to listen to me and-“

“Who’s a cute, fuzzy-wuzzy hairball?” I got cut off as he started to rub my head harder than I would have liked. Actually, I would have preferred he didn’t touch me in general. It was now that I realized that he couldn’t understand me, which meant my day just got a whole lot more complicated. “Why don’t you be a good little hairball and go catch a mouse or somethin’?” Without warning, I was pushed off the table and fell to the ground, landing on my face. “Huh, weird. I thought cats always land on their feet.”

Picking myself off the ground, I rubbed my now sore nose with my paw. “Oh yeah, you sure showed him who the boss around here is.” I turned my head to see Angel munching away on a bowl of popcorn.

“This is only a minor setback,” I groaned as I continued to rub my sore nose. “It looks like we are stuck with him for the time being.” I sighed before picking myself off the ground and dusting myself off. “We’ll just have to ignore him till either he leaves or till Fluttershy gets back. Until then, I still have to do the chores that Fluttershy entrusted to me while she’s away.”

“And how do you plan to do that now that you are a quarter of the size you used to be?”

I shrugged and gave his question some thought. I hadn’t accounted for my changing size and species today, and there was a long list of things I had to take care of today and future days till Fluttershy returns home. “I’m not sure, but I’ll have to make it work either way. How hard could it be?”

It was very fucking hard, apparently. For the last two hours, I’ve been working nonstop trying to get all these damn chores done, only to have Zephyr go around and messing everything up!

First, I tried to put food in the bird feeders, only the bag that had said food was five times my actual size. I had to find a cup with a handle to grip with my mouth to get a cup of bird food, and then climb to pour it into the feeder. However, Zephyr knocked off the bird feeders that hung from the sealing as he danced around while blasting some music.

Then there was me having to help clean out the litter box for the ferrets, which stank to high heaven! I had to grip the pooper scooper in my mouth and try to dig and pour the contents into a plastic bag I had set next to the box. You can probably guess where I’m going with this. Just as I was almost done with the task, my body is bumped into the very bag filled with shit thanks to fucking Zephyr as he started to arrange the furniture for no damn reason. I never smelled so bad in my life before, and it didn’t help that through all this, Angel Bunny was watching and laughing at my expense.

I barely managed to get all the chores for the day done before climbing onto the sofa to get some sleep. The next day wasn’t any better as I tried to do all the chores of a full day, and Zephyr didn’t make it any easier. I was starting to get what Angel was talking about.

I was now just relaxing on the kitchen counter, trying to catch my breath after feeding all the animals their breakfast. “Dear lord,” I gasped as I lay on my back. “Please, Fluttershy, hurry home. Your brother is gonna make me go insane.” If it wasn’t for the fact that he was Fluttershy’s brother, I would have seriously hurt this dumb ass. He’s currently upstairs taking a shower, which is giving me some much-needed time away from him.

As I lay on my back trying to enjoy my break, there came a knock on the back door. The door was in the kitchen, which was technically two doors in a way. The door was made to open two ways, either the top or bottom, which I’m guessing is so Fluttershy could open the bottom part to let some of the smaller animals out. I hopped onto the counter closest to the door and used my paw to open the upper half of the door. When the door opened, I was greeted by a familiar face. “Uh, hello there.” It was Applejack. She had a few patches of her fur covered in some kind of white powder. “Howdy, little fella. Is Fluttershy home?” Seeing as I couldn’t really talk, something I never thought I’d go through again, I just shook my head. “Well, that’s odd.” She probably didn’t get the memo about Fluttershy leaving to go watch the Breezies since she was away. “Then what about Johann? Ya know, her dragon friend?”

‘Oh believe me, he’s around.’ I shook my head since there was no way to tell her it was actually me.

“Well, that’s a shame.” She opened the rest of the door and let herself in, which I didn’t mind, seeing as it is Applejack. But as she walked inside, I noticed that she had something on her back. It was a pie on top of an oven mitt with the top covered in aluminum foil. The scent of freshly baked apples filled my nostrils, causing me to smile ear to ear and even purr. And then it hit me: that is the pie she was gonna give me for taking Apple Bloom to Zecora’s. She moved over to the table and slid the pie off her back onto the table perfectly. “I’ll just leave this here until he gets back. I would try to find him myself, but I got a letter from my cousin askin’ me and my kin to go over for his and his new marefriend, Little Strongheart’s, three year anniversary.” I gave a meow, since that’s pretty much all I can do at this point. Just before Applejack could close the door, she peeked her head in. “Now don’t you or your little critters go eating that pie. It’s my way of saying thanks to Johann.” She winked and left, shutting the door behind her.

The smell of the pie filled the room, and I jumped from the counter over to the table in a single jump. “Oh, sweet mama.” I could feel my mouth start to water as I stared at the pie. The last day and a half have been a pain, but it’s all worth it now. And I was actually starting to thank that flower for turning me into a cat, because now, with my smaller size, this pie is almost as big as my whole body. And it was all for me. I intend to leave some for Fluttershy, but right now, nothing was going to ruin this moment for me.

“Ooh, pie.” I looked up and could see Zephyr walking in with a towel on his head. He was moving closer to the table and reached out his hoof. “Don’t mind if I do.” That was the last straw. I hissed at him and swiped his hoof away with my paw. “Ouch!” I moved myself in front of my pie and continued to hiss at him, raising my back up and glaring at him. “Hey, what’s the deal, cat?” He tried to push me away, but I swatted his hoof. “Oh, you wanna be like that? Fine, two can play at that game.”

He left the room, and before I knew it, he came back with a cat carrier and set it on the table. I had little time to react as he quickly picked me up, shoved me in the carrier, and shut the door behind me. “Heh! Brain the size of a marble.” The carrier was too small for me to turn my body, meaning I was stuck facing the inside wall. “I’ll be taking this pie now. Mmm, apple.” I could hear the sound of his hoofsteps leaving the room.

It was in that moment that all the anger, frustration, and hate that I had accommodated for the past year began to boil over, making me see red. I gasped in as much air as possible. “THIS…..MEANS…..WAR!!!” My caged rattled as I screamed at the top of my cat lungs.

(1 hour later 3rd pov)

“Mmm mmm that pie sure was delicious.” Zephyr gloated as he trotted into the kitchen with the empty pie tin in his wing. “Hey cat how about I let you lick off the crumbs to show there isn’t any hard feelings?” The pegasus stallion gloated as he dropped the pan in front of the carrier, however he didn’t receive any response from the black feline. “Aww what’s the matter, still “feeline” bad for me taking your pie?” He continued to gloat but again not a sound came. “Cat?” He turned to the carrier and could see that the cat’s tail was sticking out and that the feline was laying on its back unmoving. “Oh Celestia. Nonono!” Quickly removing opening the cage door Zephyr pulled the cat out laying him on the table. Much to his horror when he saw that the cat’s paws were stiff as board. “Kitty kitty?” He gently rocked the cat but got no reaction as the body remained rigid. “Oh Fluttershy is gonna kill me.” It dawned on him that he had just killed one of Fluttershy’s animals, and a cold chill ran down his spine. “Okay what do I do, what do I do?!” Unbeknownst to panicking stallion one of the cat’s eyes peeked open and tried his best to suppress his grin. “Uh bury it.” As he turned to look for something to help hide his dirty deed Johann quickly got up, jumped of the table and ran into the other room. “Garbage bags, freezer. What the?” When Zephyr finally turned around, he saw that the “dead” cat was nowhere to be seen. “Oh I’m so gonna kill that cat!”

He quickly ran into the living room where he could see some of the other animals roaming about. “Alright you little furball where are you?” He crouched down low trying to see if the cat had hid under any of the furniture. Meanwhile up in the bedroom both Johann and Angel were preparing to set their plan in motion.

(30 minutes back Johann Pov)

“Damn fucking cage!” I grunted as I tried to use my back paws to kick the door open. If it wasn’t for my unbridled rage I would have given up thirty minutes ago. My growing need for revenge was the only thing that was keeping me from accepting defeat. “When I get out of here I’m gonna bring that idiot down a peg!!”

“Is that so?” a familiar voice asked and from one of the holes in the side of the carrier I could see Angel Bunny. “Tell you what pal, I’d be willing to help get you out of there and get your revenge.”

I knew this bunny too well to know he isn’t the sweet and friendly bunny he pretends to be. “What do you want Angel?”

I could see him smirking as he leaned against the cage. “Just a mountain of carrots when you finally turn back to normal.”

I was honestly expecting something far worse than that, but that made this deal all the easier for me. “Angle if you help get me out and humiliate that mother fucker, I’ll give you two mountains of carrots.”

“Deal!” He poked his paw into the cage and motioned for me to move my head closer. “Okay here’s the plan, first you're gonna play dead till he comes and pulls you out, and then we will…” He whispered the rest of the plan to me, and I could feel my lips curl into an evil grin that stretched from ear to ear. Oh yeah things are coming together.

(Present time 3rd pov)

“Where are you cat?” Zephyr called out as he returned to the kitchen trying to find the feline so he may put him back in the carrier. After no luck he moved back to the living room where he had left his bathrobe after his shower. Then in the corner of his eye he saw something, a black tail peeking just from behind a set of curtains. “There you are, you mangy fur ball.” He whispered as he got down low and began to stalk his way towards the exposed tail.

Slowly bit by bit he got closer to his target until his hoof was right above the tail. “Gotcha!!” He slammed his hoof down and yanked on the tail. However instead of pulling out a cat, all that came out was a fake tail with a string tied to the end of it. “What the?” He saw the string and tugged on it. Then suddenly he felt a warm liquid splash onto his flank and yelped, jumping back. “What the!?” He quickly looked up and saw a large bucket above his head and an odd pale yellow liquid dripping from the suspended container. A single drop landed on his forearm and his eyes went wide in shock as his fur started to fall off. “What the hey is going on!?”

As if the universe wanted to answer his question a light orange bottle rolled from under the curtain. On the label it read. “Veterinary approved fur remover” The moment he read the label Zephyr Breeze face went pale and he suddenly felt a cool breeze against his lower half. “Oh sweet Celestia no.” He slowly began to turn his head back fearing what he believed the liquid that was poured on him from the bucket. The moment his eyes met his flank he let out a girlish scream. His rear backside was completely exposed, and I mean EVERYTHING was exposed.

In an attempt to save his pride, he quickly ran to the coach and grabbed the bathrobe and tried to hide his shame in the hopes that nopony would enter and see his exposed bottom. He heard a creaking sound and snapped his attention to the source where he saw the door had opened. “Oh no.” He realized that the cat could have wandered outside and could get lost, if such a thing were to happen he would never hear the end from his sister. He quickly ran out the door to try and spot the dervish feline, only for the moment he stepped outdoor it shut on him and he heard a *Click* sound. He tried to turn the handle only to find it was locked. “Oh no….well I’ll just go around back.” Little did he know that the end of his bathrobe was caught in the door, and just as Zephyr took a step away from the door.

*Riiiippp!!!*

“Oh No.” Just as he realized what had happened a group of pegasus mares were flying by and let out a collected scream. Seeing the situation, he was in Zephyr trying to play it off and act cool. “Hey ladies like what you see?”

“Somepony call the cops!! There is a pervert streaking in front of Fluttershy’s house!!!” One mare called out as Zephyr took this as his queue to get out of there.

Opening the mail slot in the door Johann could be seen with a smirk on his face. “It’s a little earlier for a full moon Nyahahhahahh!!” He closed the mail slot and returned to his time of peace.

(3 days later Johann Pov.)

When Fluttershy finale returned home from her trip she was shocked to see me in my cat form. But that quickly changed to her squealing with joy as she picked me up and cradled me in her arms, saying how cute and adorable I was. And I would be a lair if I said I didn’t enjoy the compliments, and the head pats, or the scratches behind the ears, or the bellyru-OK!! Getting off topic here. After she got over my new form she flew over to Ponyville Spa to pick up the antidote for the Poison Joke. Apparently after the last time it happened the spa kept the Antidote in stock just in case of an emergency.

One bath later and I was finally back to normal. “Thanks again Flutters. If I had to go one more day as a cat, I was gonna lose it.”

She smiled and took a seat on the couch patting the empty space next to her. “It was no trouble Noir.” I couldn’t help but smile as she used the nickname she chose to use for me. “I’m so sorry I never warned you about that stuff before.” She apologized softly. “I can’t imagine not being able to do or talk much while trapped in another body.”

I hopped onto the couch in my pony size form and yawned. “Trust me, I don’t recommend it. But enough about me. How was your trip?”

I spent the next hour listening to Fluttershy as she gushed about the cute creatures she got to see. But then there came a knock at the door cutting her off. “Now who could that be this late?” Fluttershy wondered as she got off the coach and walked over to the door and opened it. When she did I could see a familiar grey fur mare with blonde mane and eyes, she was wearing a mailmare suit. “Derpy? What brings you here?”

Said mare ducked her head into her mailbag until she came up with an orange letter in her mouth. “Fwo ouh.” She said with the letter still in her mouth. Fluttershy took the letter in her wing and Derpy took off, only a minute later we could hear a crashing sound. “Whoops my bad.”

After closing the door Fluttershy opened the letter and began to read it, her eyes scanned the page before I saw the widen in surprise. “Something wrong Flutters?” I asked now curious to see if everything was okay.

“I just got a letter from the Ponyville Police Station. They have my brother Zephyr Breeze there for….” She took another glance at the letter before cocking her head back in surprise. “Streaking in public?”

I smiled as I leaned back into my seat and got comfortable before uttering six words. “Brain the size of a marble.”