Ch.1

“Oh~, what did I drink last night?” I groaned as I got up, feeling like I had the worst hangover ever. My head was spinning, my eyes hurt from the light, and my ears were ringing. As I stood up on uneasy legs I felt my stomach lurch, trying to force out whatever I consumed from the night before, but I swallowed it back down. I barely noticed lights with wings floating about me in curiosity before they sped off in all directions or blinked out of existence entirely.

They looked like fairies, from The Legend of Zelda. Holy shit. Whatever I drank was really strong stuff if I’m hallucinating during the hangover. Is that possible? Eugh~ my head~...

“What did I do the last...three nights?” I asked myself, only getting glimpses, but not much more as I stumbled and fell on my face. Groaning, I looked to see a rock as the obvious culprit. I then blinked in confusion as I saw brown leather boots that looked to belong to the 13th century. “What the bleeding hell?” I tried to wiggle my toes, but they felt awkward, and the boots seemed oddly shaped inside. I took the boot off to see my caucasian plantigrade feet were replaced by red-orange digitigrade canine paws. “What the fuck?!” I crawled over to a convenient puddle of water to look at myself.

Looking at myself, I found the head of a fox with red fur on an otherwise lithe humanoid body with white going down my front starting at my muzzle, I even had tiny claws tipping my fingers. This, paired with my fluffy tail, confirmed I was now an anthro fox. As for my clothes, I had the attire of Disney’s Robin Hood on. Hat, tunic and all, but I also had trousers on thank goodness. I had a traditional double-edged shortsword on my belt, but no bow or quiver of arrows, but at least I had a weapon.

“What did I drink last night?” I asked, feeling myself under the trousers, at least finding I still had everything a guy should have, besides the added animal parts. “Thank god for small miracles.” I sighed before getting up and looking around. I was in a forest, the trees looked strange though, not like any species I had ever laid eyes on. Was I in another country? Wherever I was at the top of a cliff.

Looking to the sky, the distance looked to be full of smog, barely breathable. Well, the sky right above me was the clearest blue I’ve ever seen in my life, but beyond that, it looked like Los Angeles beyond that oddly distinct difference in air quality. I could also see what looked like blimps and primitive planes flying around just beyond the clear sky, avoiding it like there was a barrier.

“Where am I?” I questioned as I looked down at the forest from my perch, seeing a few mountains, some more cliffs and a set of ruined towers. “That might be a good place to start.”

Starting what felt like the humble beginning to some fantasy adventure, I walked through the forest and down the small mountain I was on, hand on the hilt of my sword. I really hope I could use this thing because it was the only weapon I had in case of a wild animal attack. I was tempted to draw the sword but it would only waste my stamina carrying it drawn, but I barely knew what type of sword I had other than it was hefty despite its relatively short length.

Getting through the forest to the ruins was a bit of a hassle. The trees, vines, and underbrush were hard to navigate with now closely packed it was. I almost tripped over roots but always found my balance, weirdly enough. I was clumsy, so having this much control was weird. Must be a fox trait.

Just before the ruins, I stumbled upon what looked like a wreck of some air balloon. This confused me as I noticed the armored plates and weapons scattered about, along with a few bodies. I couldn’t tell how long they had been here, at least a few decades if the skeletons and vines all over the place had anything to say, but I’m no forensic scientist or analyst.

Approaching it, I spotted some weapons, mostly WW1 or older, and picked up a rifle. I didn’t have to guess the model of the rifle I picked up because I sparsely used it hunting, it was even in good enough condition to hunt. It was a Springfield M1903, the U.S’s standard issue rifle for WWI and nearly all of WWII. I had some interest in it for a while until I got out of high school, and as an impressionable little shit back then I was briefly interested in my nation’s military. Wait, now that I thought about it, my accent was now sorta British considering how I cursed when I woke up.

Sighing, I looked over the dead a bit more, noting how they looked like anthropomorphic horses wearing armor and had weird appendages on their bodies. Most had what looked like wings while others had what looked like horns on their skulls. They were nothing but bones with a lot of the bits missing due to predators and scavengers, but enough to tell what was what.

I started checking what remained of their pockets, feeling kinda sick about this, but if the rifle was my only ranged weapon it was best to get what ammo they had. I also snagged some of their packs to carry the ammo and the rifle, the weight feeling oddly familiar for some reason and the clinking of coins as I looted them oddly excited me as I pocketed the tarnished coinage.

Along with the coins I also looted several five-round clips of the 30-06 cartridges the rifle used, the huge bullets only looking slightly marked by water tarnish. Now that I consider it, this loot is in pretty good condition considering it’s been sitting around for possibly dozens of years.

“This is one hell of a Trip.” I sighed, hoping I didn’t look insane and wasn’t robbing a museum. Then again this all seemed too real and honestly, my mind was never this vivid on a drug trip. Especially not on one that causes a hangover, ow, head still aches.

Blinking those thoughts away, I finished looting ammo and stored it in the durable if dirty canvas belt pack, which neatly fit on the belt I woke up wearing and started walking to the ruins again. The path after the zeppelin was much less dense in foliage, showing the path it had crashed. The gouge in the earth didn’t run the whole way to the ruins, but it almost made it there.

“War or accident?” I wondered aloud as I walked through the wreckage. The bullet pockmarks on the stone leaned more towards this crash being from some war more than anything. “Hopefully it’s long over already, considering the bones.”

Hearing the snapping of a branch, I felt my body move on its own, grabbing the hilt of my sword with one swift movement. Quietly I looked around, keeping an eye on the forest as my ears darted back and forth, my sense of hearing focusing in on sources of noise. I didn’t question the strange sensation as I kept my pace to the ruins, hoping an animal was not stalking me.

Hearing many things, but not anything that felt like a predator, I relaxed. This forest was strange, it only looked vaguely like the forest I knew. Though I have to admit, there were some forests on earth that might look stranger, the world being large and having many beautiful and strange things, which meant the only thing that ruled this out on being earth was the armored zeppelin. And maybe the smog, wasn’t this bad unless you were in a huge city and the air wasn’t moving.

“Where the hell am I?” I asked myself again as I walked towards the ruins. Even if it ended up not being the safest place, it was a shelter. In the wild, shelter, food, and water are big concerns, not that I would know much, but I do know a safe, warm place to sleep is the thing to start with. I could last a few days without food and water before they became a real need. “Is some advanced weather tech being used? Some experiments with Global Warming?”

Walking another few miles I got to a simple suspension bridge that was barely holding together. I whined in fear as I carefully transversed the bridge, getting to the other side of the canyon to the plateau. There was a river below, helping show what made the thin if deep canyon. The bridge held as I made it to the other side, promptly jogging away from the creaking, swaying thing. After taking a breath of relief I moved to the main gates of the ruins, of course along with the battle-scarred stone, the gate itself was on the ground.

However, I was given pause at recognizing the heraldry on the gate. A triangle composed of three smaller triangles, wings cradling it and seeming to be carrying it. Fairies. The Triforce. Oh shit. Um, I’d better be careful. If this isn’t just some extra-vivid trip, I might be in serious danger. Bracing myself, I resolved to enter the ruins. I’m not going to get anywhere standing outside like a coward.

---]===>

“*ACHOO!*” I sniffled as my sinuses violently ejected the offending dust I’d kicked up just by walking through the destroyed foyer. It was a damn mess in here. Almost looked like the stone had been melted or even beaten into the dust, like what made me discover how hard my new foxy nose could sneeze.

Anyway, I could see sword and hammer marks, claws, and I think hoof prints all over the place. Also, more skeletons, though these guys had more archaic gear like bows and swords, all broken, burnt, and unusable in some from. Even their armor was useless. I’m no smith, carpenter or armorer. If I was this would be a goldmine, but otherwise, it’s junk. The triforce heraldry on their pauldrons helped drive home the creeping feeling that I’ve been R.O.B’d. I’ve read enough fanfics to know what’s going on here!

Breathe. In. Out. Whew. Chill John. Don’t panic. You’re just shoved into the body of Robin Hood, tossed through time and space, and-oh gawd I’m gonna die~!

…

Okay, panic attack out of the way. Ew, I’m covered in dust from rolling on the floor in the fetal position. Maybe if I investigate more it’ll help calm my nerves. Get it together John, you’re not making progress feeling sorry for yourself, like usual. Damn if I couldn’t go for some weed right now though to help calm me down.

“Okay, so. What in the hell happened here?” I whispered to myself in wonder as I navigated this massacre. I could see two different uniforms on these guys, one gold and one purple, so it was two separate groups of these weird pony anthros judging by their skulls and hooved legs. Couldn’t tell much of what they look like from just bone though. Whatever, not why I’m here. I need to find a room that is relatively clean and otherwise potentially comfortable.

Another few hours and I found a few buildings still standing in this castle’s town. The fact that it was so large that it seemed to function as a city meant whoever had owned it had a lot of damn power. But now they’re gone and I’m living on the second floor of what seemed to have been a bakery from the built-in stone brick oven. Heh, makes you feel small in the scope of history knowing nothing but ruins may be all that is left of you one day.

---]===>

Cracking my back I got up from my rough night’s sleep. I don’t even remember laying down, all that hiking in the forest with little food wore me out. Yawning, I grabbed the rifle and walked back out of my formerly-a-bakery home. I quickly noticed tracks from deer running through the dirt road, even seeing a doe running off. So there was a food source in these ruins, maybe even a way for them to leave if they’re not using the bridge. Then again this plateau was huge.

I walked around this small section of town inside the castle walls. It was about sixteen buildings, most barely a two-story. They functioned as both shop and home for those who lived and worked here. Grunting from popping my back, I turned a corner and spotted a well. “Please, be safe to drink,” I whispered as I started pulling the rope, hoping the bucket was still connected.

I sighed in relief at finding an actual bucket full of water, the rope and bucket looking rather waterlogged and even rotted a bit from being wet for so long. I’d have to scrounge around for another rope and bucket when this eventually fails. “So the well still has water and the bucket still holds water, if unsanitary. Just need to boil the water then.” I hummed, thinking of how I’m going to need to find a pot or kettle. Thinking back to the keep of the castle, none of the bodies had armor or helmets intact enough to use I think.

Setting the bucket on the lip of the well where it was supposed to go, I cracked my neck and looked around a bit more. I soon found a wild garden full of a variety of hardy vegetables like carrots, beets, and other salad veggies. There was even an apple tree, a large and old apple tree with huge bright red apples that had grown into the house it was behind, branches ruining the second floor and roots cracking its foundation. That's fruits and vegetables, I got a decent food source. I needed to check for other dangers and hopefully find a pot. A nice place to get firewood would work too didn’t want to take from the tree that would be giving me food.

“Okay, things are looking up for me.” I preened, hands-on my narrow hips. “If looking up is living in ruins and being in someplace I don’t understand.” Don’t panic. Stop thinking about it. Don’t think-oh gawd why~!

I shook my head to help get over my momentary existential crisis before I walked around for a few more hours. I found a few slightly dented chest plates of armor that I could use as pans, as well as a bucket helmet with the visor rusted shut I could maybe use as a pot. Not exactly great, but it would help in a pinch like now. My body was currently begging for food, so I returned to the Bakery and got some apples on the way. After enjoying the incredibly sweet and delicious red apples the size of my fists I relaxed for a bit.

It was midday when I got up again and this time for firewood. I needed to boil any parasites from the well water before I drank any of it. Not exactly a need yet with those apples giving my body some needed hydration, but the heat from the fire for the coming night and boiling water to hopefully store and drink was a need before it got too dark.

Other than finding some dry bits from the ruins of buildings where the second floor had collapsed, I had some difficulty finding dry wood since most were wet from what had to be a recent rain. I didn’t have much of a choice so I broke off some of the wood from the houses and lugged them back to the bakery, getting to work on a fire and mostly spending an hour trying to figure out how. I didn’t exactly have a flint on me, thankfully I remembered that fire sticks weren’t just a trope used in cartoons.

Another hour and I had the water in the bucket helmet over the fire, balanced between bricks straddling the little cooking fire I’d made as I sat in an old and somehow intact wooden chair. “How did I end up in this situation? What did I do to forget three days...alcohol is definitely part of it, there was also...I think some meth.” I groaned. “How many days was I awake?”

I sighed and stared at the fire, waiting for the water to boil. I removed the improvised pot with some old cotton rags and place it on the counter in the center to cool. I used another chest plate and a cloth to keep the dust and dirty air out. Wait, these chest plates are a little round, did the people here do the whole Roman physique armor thing? Or…I held it to my chest, and felt a little warm at imagining how big the girl this armor had to have belonged to was.

“At least something is going my way at least.” I sighed, putting the perverted thoughts out of my head as I put the ‘breast’ plate back over the former helmet. Hm, wait, wasn’t there something about running the boiled water through a charcoal filter? How do I get charcoal?

I shivered from the cold wind rushing in through the broken door before going out into the ruins again, this time to look for something to keep me warmer in this weather. It looked like spring, but rain and other hazards would not be that great for my health if I couldn’t keep myself warm while I slept. The fire was going to help for sure, but something heavy would work wonders.

Looking for another few hours in the ruins, I noticed a few different species of dead folks in other places, huddled in corners, hiding from the fighting most likely. A few looked like dogs, some birds, another group looked like lizards. Each wore tatters of what was once clothes, all looking similar to things found in the 13th century, and I could tell they mostly died from the rubble and not a soldier if the rocks in the piles and broken bones were any indicator.

“What exactly happened here?” I questioned again as I walked from building to building, barely giving thought to how it looked like all the damage happened from the air. I mean, I’m no expert, and I’ve always been drunk, or high on meth or other hallucinogenic stuff, but I do watch a lot of crime shows, mostly ones that were accurate and not puffed-up dramas. “Must have been some sort of siege, but I don’t see any huge boulders from a trebuchet.”

I turned into a storage room for what looked like a large restaurant maybe a 15-minute walk from the bakery. Looking around it was mostly intact, unlike most of this place which had caved in rooftops. Snorting at the musty smells in here, I walked around opening rotten crates hoping to find something useful, mostly finding rotten food, some charcoal, and I think some wooden statue in a large crate. Whatever, or whoever it was modeled after, they had a really muscular abdomen, but whatever, it might burn good since it wasn’t sealed with lacquer.

I cracked open about a dozen of these primitive crates and barrels, happy to find leather, good condition leather. Smiling, I checked it further and found this leather had most likely been used to handle hot metal being moved from the cooking area to the dining hall. Not too good for me since I already had cloth rags for that and seeing as I needed blankets. The bad news was most of this leather was in small bundles and would need to be sewn into a proper blanket.

I took as much leather as I could plus some charcoal and headed back to the bakery ready for sleep again with my body aching from all the exercise. I remember now why I hunted so rarely and why I never went camping.

---]===>

I woke to the sound of birds as I shrugged off the layers of leather presently covering me on the deflated and frankly gross pile of dirty rags in a wood box that I loosely considered a bed. I definitely need to sew the leather together somehow, but I doubt I’ll find any leathercraft tools that haven’t rusted beyond use here. I may have to try crafting my own, even though I know fuck-all about metalworking. That and I need to wash these rags, find more to actually get a decently padded surface that won’t break my spine.

Shaking myself awake in the cold morning air, I walked to my woodpile and shoved more scraps onto the dark coals. Stoking it a bit, I sighed as heat filled the room, giving me much needed warmth in this cold morning. Not that my fur was not doing a good job though. I’ll need to see about putting up some sort of door to keep the wind from blowing in so much.

I looked around the stone and wood bakery a bit more closely and noted several depictions of two winged and horned horses, raising the sun and moon in the moulding and framing the Triforce. Okay, that’s different. Is this not Hyrule then? Well, the anthro horse skeletons and me being Robin Hood means humans and whatnot might not even exist here, but still, another difference to make note of.

Let’s hope this new world isn’t flat, because I think my brain would fry faster than if I did a double dose of cocaine and chased it with vodka. I could actually go for a rum-n-coke or a vodcola right now. Damn it. Why didn’t I ever learn the recipe for cola?!

“Oh well, time to look for more supplies.” I groaned, getting up and going around the ruins again. I grabbed some apples and drank some of the boiled water just before leaving. I unslung the rifle from my back and decided to take a shot at hunting. “A bow or crossbow would be better, but the ones I saw were ruined beyond repair,” I muttered sullenly, oddly displeased at the fact I didn’t have a bow. Even a shortbow would’ve been enough.

Walking towards the main keep since I’d seen some deer prancing in the overgrown courtyard the other day, I took note that most of the damage got worse in this direction. Weirdly, some of the broken stones were floating in the air, which smelled of ozone. I cursed, the air also flickered with some rainbow light that came and went in waves, heat and raging pulses of what looked like rainbow lightning arched about. Why are the deer not unnerved by this place?

Shivering from a sense of wrongness, I was tempted to go back, but then I saw a doe just ahead lightly grazing. It rushed away just as I tried taking aim and I gave chase. I kept my pace slow, watching the walls and floor, noting how the doe disturbed the rubble and foliage that had overtaken the keep.

I also took note of soldiers, laying where they had died. Bodies burnt and broken, some even looked cooked in their armor, clutching their weapons in agony. I paused at one that seemed to have been praying, for what or who I didn’t know. His armor had those horses on it too, the white one was perched atop the Triforce above where his horn protruded through the helmet.

Noting this, I turned and found the doe grazing a few rooms away. The walls were crumbling between us, dust rising in the air, the dust sparkling with a light rainbow in the beams of sunlight, and there was a statue made of gray stone with five arms, sat in the room between us, which looked weird with the floating spheres and rainbow beams launching into the sky. I ignored it as I took aim, targeting the deer’s torso, aiming towards the heart.

“Get off me you creten!” I heard from a haughty female in the ruins, the scream spooking my target and the rest of the nearby herd that was with it. They ran off to god knows whereas I turned around, worried for whoever that was.

“Great, just what I need.” I huffed, barely realizing I started crouching and sticking to the shadows. This seemed like I was used to it, which is weird as I’ve never tried sneaking before. At least not like this. Keeping to the shadows was easy in these ruins with all the vegetation growing here. I also started using the trees as I got closer to the screaming girl, hearing others laughing.

I climbed over the top of a building to see a black anthro mare in blue-silver armor. She had a huge bust with a boob window in her chest plate for her cleavage and incredibly dense chainmail covering the sides of those chest-melons. Her thigh armor was damaged and showing off her thick muscular thighs when she kicked at her assailant as I noticed her horn and wings. She was just like the depiction in the bakery and on that praying guy’s armor.

“What did you do to me?! To my magic?!” The mare screamed out, hugging her chest plate to her head-sized breasts as it hung loosely from damaged chainmail.

Her assailant, a busty reindeer looming over the mare as she and the other reindeer in her group chuckled. The leader started undoing their belt for their trousers. They wore what looked like the grey WWII uniforms the Nazi Waffen SS had with the weapons to match.

“Oh, just something R&D made for magic users back when we conquered this land. Good thing we found you during this patrol, I was getting needy.” The doe chuckled as she dropped her pants, showing off a large veiny male member easily the size of a large Braadworst and a heavy set of apple-sized balls. The others took out their dicks with their flies and started stroking themselves.

“What?!” The mare shrieked in shock as I blinked in disbelief from what I was witnessing. The reindeer chuckled as she walked out of her pants and kicked the mare with her heavy jackboots, knocking her over. The black mare groaned as the Reindeer licked her/his lips and grabbed her victim’s chest plate, ripping it off. Her/his men got closer, only one really keeping guard as they prepared to take the mare.

“Oh hell no.” I quietly snarled. I may have been a drug-addicted wastrel before I got shoved into this furry fetishist body, but damn it, rape is not cool! I then froze. They didn't know I was here. I had a clear line of sight for shooting. I could easily save that mare from being raped, possibly to death considering those reindeer assholes look like Nazis. But then I’d have to kill them.

“Unhand me you-augh!” The mare was interrupted by the doe/buck punching her in the jaw as he/she/they/IT sawed that massive schlong between the mare’s head-sized tits. One of its cohorts started cutting at the mare’s armored leggings with a knife as the leader stroked itself with the mare’s tits.

“Slaves don’t speak unless ordered to! Learn quickly!” It punched her again, the mare’s face quickly swelling as she leered hatefully at her assailant, even still trying to push It off of her, but then it took out a Luger pistol and shot her in the left shoulder.

“AAAAA~!” The mare screeched bloody murder, all attempts to stop her attacker turned towards cradling her wound, the arm attached to that shoulder gone limp aside from agonized spasms. What sickened me, even more, was the fact this monster seemed to be getting off from what it did to her.

“If you don’t want that to be your head, shut up and suck it!” The doe demanded, pressing through the mare’s boobs and pressing it’s flared glans to the mare’s cringing mouth, the mare not crying, but still clearly either on the verge of sobbing or trying to bite the doe’s dick.

“Fuck this.” I hissed, raising the rifle, lined up the iron sights, remembering air conditions as a factor. Thankfully this old rifle actually had good sights. I aimed for the leader’s head just as she shoved her dick into the mare’s mouth, moaning as the mare cried. I breathed in then out, steadied my hands. The others at mare’s legs just got her armor ripped open to reveal her pussy.

“Fuck! Who’d thought I’d get a chance to have an al-.” I fired. The round slammed into its head, blood, brain, skull bits, and an antler spraying as the bullet practically ripped her dome off, sending her limp onto the mare. The soldiers went from masturbating to diving for cover as they started looking in the direction I had fired from. I was already on the move through to another angle as the soldiers took cover, the mare spitting out the dead doe’s dick and weakly began wriggling out from under the dead weight of the would-be rapist.

“Any sight of the sniper?!” Shouted one of the Nazis as I climbed a tree to the next floor, hiding in the canopy.

“No!” One yelled as they looked around.

“Someone grab the slave!” Another barked out.

I carefully pulled back on the bolt and ejected the spent casing into my hand so it wouldn’t fall and alert them. Once I stuffed the brass into my pocket, I chambered the next round before taking aim at the soldier running for the mare who was still just getting out from under the corpse. Breathe. In. Out.

I didn’t bother aiming for the head this time. Seeing the round literally blow the first bitch’s head off told me these bullets were more than enough to be lethal at center-of-mass. She didn’t even make it halfway to the mare before my next round went through her chest, and I jumped over to another tree as I unloaded the brass.

“Shit!” The Soldiers called out.

“Over there! Throw a paralyze!” The Other yelled pointing to my tree. The first threw some can at my tree as I started rushing away, gas leaking from it. I covered my mouth with my tunic as I moved into the building to avoid the gas. “They’re in the building, move!”

I grunted as I reloaded my rifle and moved upstairs to aim down the stairway. The first one held a mirror around the corner, and I cursed before jumping down, my surprise spoiled, but the way the mirror flicked back around told me I didn’t have long before the last two nazis were ready. I rounded the corner, staying low, a pistol bullet flying high since I was hunched nearly half over. I charged and jammed the barrel into the nearest one’s gut, pulling the trigger, and then I jumped as I dropped the rifle, vaulting over her as I drew my arming sword, stabbing the last one in the chest as I dragged them both to the cold stone.

“Fucking bitch.” The one with my sword in its gut gasped before its eyes went cold. I laid there between the two dead nazis, panting, the adrenaline dying quickly as I processed I’d just killed four people.

“Crap,” I whined looking at the blood on my hands. “How? How did I do that so easily?” I shivered, my hands shaking more than the rest of me.

“That was quite, unf, impressive.” Came the haughty voice of the black mare, causing me to look over at her. Her good arm was crossed over her breasts, conveniently hiding her nipples as she held her injured arm to keep it still. But that did nothing for her exposed nethers, leaving her a rather arousing sight, even if she wasn’t human.

“I just killed four people,” I whined.

“And? You did your duty, protecting your rightful Princess! Be proud!” The mare haughtily declared with a vicious smile, her teeth unusually sharp at the canines. Now that I got a better look at her, she even had slit eyes. Those are not normal for horses I think.

“Princess?” I asked getting up. This can’t be Princess Zelda! If this is Hyrule, there’s only one rightful princess, and it’s her!

“Yes. I know, I’ve been gone a long time.” She looked around the ruins, looking sad for a moment. “Far too long. What has become of the kingdom?”

“I...have no idea. I woke up in the forest a day ago. I have no clue what happened here or how long ago it was. Just that this place is in ruins. I’ve been scavenging to survive.” I informed the busty mare, who seemed to not care at all that she was flashing me her groin. It was getting harder not to let my eyes trail below her neckline.

“Truly?” She asked me, looking me over. “You have the appearance of a skilled hunter and woodsman, so perhaps even if you weren’t of similar circumstance to me, you’d be rather clueless of the affairs of the nation at large.”

“Hey, don’t take the whole tunic, boots, and feathered hat to mean I’m a real hunter. I woke up with these clothes. Speaking of which...how about we get you covered up, huh?” I nervously asked, and the mare seemed to gain a devilish grin.

“Oh? Well now, it seems that perhaps I am too beautiful for your eyes?” She removed her arm, giving a slight pose and thrusting her chest out, making those delicious breasts jiggle, and my eyes were immediately glued to them. “Good to see I haven’t gotten rusty in 1000 years.”

“Ah, yeah, so may we, uh, get you clothed? Aren’t you cold?” We asked while moving around her back towards the bakery.

“The surface of the moon is infinitely colder and hotter than the planet we’re standing on, and I’ve had to suffer it for literally a thousand years. A little draft won’t-.” She perked up as a cold breeze came through, her nipples standing erect as she shivered. “Or, perhaps I have spoken too soon. Damned banishment magic.” She then eyed my tunic. “You will give me your tunic immediately! Your Princess demands it!”

Just what have I gotten myself into…

Author's Note

First chapter of this story.