Dropping In 2

Section Two

RUN and the return of Call of Duty

"So where did we go this time?" Scootaloo asked, looking up at Cole and seeing him rooted in place, his eyes wide open and mumbling to himself.

"Uhhh, are you OK?" Scootaloo said, looking around the area and seeing that they were in space on a bunch of red platforms interspersed by lots of holes and open spaces.

"Run..." Cole whispered, earning a curious gaze from the Pegasus filly.

"What?" she inquired, greatly confused.

"Run" the human exclaimed once again as he slowly looked down at Scoots.

Suddenly bitching techno music began to play and a gray alien that was shaped like a testicle with arms and legs and antennae ran by, jumping from platform to platform for seemingly no reason.

"This...is Run, the WORST fucking game ever made, a fact I stated many a time in my Let's Play of the game which can be viewed on my Youtube channel here" Cole said, pointing at something behind him that didn't exist.

"What do you do in it?" the Pegasus filly inquired.

"You attempt to run down a tunnel to the exit, and fail, and you attempt to jump across gaps...and fail because you fall through the motherfucking platform because the designer of this game was a goddamned retard."

"You probably couldn't do a better job" Scoots replied.

"That's right, I couldn't, but that doesn't mean I'm not allowed to criticize. And if anyone says different they will be blocked and have insulting messages about their mothers sent to them" the human said.

"What?"

"Also there's a sequel to this game, which doesn't suck as much but it's still a piece of shit and should not have been made" Cole told her.

"So is there anything we need to do here or..." Scootaloo trailed off, looking up at the ub3r-l33t MLG fucking boss who was so fucking good at video games and deserves to be famous on Youtube unlike all those other fucking n00bs that can barely fucking play a game yet they get over a million views per video and rake in all the cash from that shit.

Fucking assholes.

"No, there's nothing we need to do here, except this" Cole declared, kicking the testicle alien off into space as he ran by and yelling "YOUR GAME'S A PIECE OF SHIT, YOU LITTLE FUCK!"

The testicle alien then careened into a star and fucking died a horrible death because that's what he deserved for falling through solid platforms all those times.

"Let's fucking go" the man exclaimed.

8========D

Immediately upon entering the next universe the two came under intense gunfire from unknown shooters; thousands of bullets sprayed around them with each and every one missing accompanied by a clatter Cole knew all too well.

"ZOMG I r sooooo gud at dis gaem!" some annoying 8-year-old squeaker yelled, reloading his akimbo FMG9s as he ran around the map Overwatch, part of Collection 1 DLC for Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3.

"Well at least it isn't CoD 75: Modernly Black Operations of Welfare in Warfare*" Cole said, having seen the atrocity that would be the future of the Call of Duty franchise.

Well, to be fair, it was a little better than CoD 74: Copy and Paste Ops II.

Cole and Scootaloo stood up as a bunch of teenage dudes yelled at the squeaker who was raping them all with his FMG9s. Quickscopes, Type 95's, and even PP90's couldn't stop this kid and his FMG9s.

"What the heck is this?" Scootaloo inquired, completely at a loss as to what was going on.

"This...is MW3, otherwise known as SHIT. This is definitely the worst of the recent Call of Duty games, though Black Cocks II is shaping up to be pretty shitty. Especially when you got rumors abound saying primary weapons in multiplayer will be able to have three attachments** and players will have six(yes, FUCKING SIX) perk slots available, meaning they'll be able to run six perks all at the same time. Also included in the game is a free wall-hack optic for all guns; just get like 20 kills with a fucking red dot sight or some shit like that and you get the wall-hack optic" Cole answered.

"Soooo...what?" Scoots asked, confused as to what all that meant. She had only been in four universes and was already feeling like she wanted to go home; these places were full of weirdos.

"Well for what ever reason we can't move onto the next universe just yet so let's just fuck about here for a little while. Maybe we need to defeat this FMG9 bitch or screw about in the campaign. As long as we don't have to go into Spec Ops we'll be OK because Spec Ops is fucking stupid and nobody plays it so I don't know why Infinity Ward kept it in this game instead of taking it out to make room for gun DLC and other shit like that" the ub3r-l33t b0ss Cole answered.

Standing up Cole found he had a UMP45 and an RPG-7 as his weapons, which were both usually his go to weapons because the UMP was a fucking boss and he had a soft spot for the RPG. Trying to pull back on the UMP's charging handle the b0$$ found himself unable to do so, realizing that players in CoD don't cock their weapons unless they pick them up off the ground.

Throwing the smg on the floor and picking it up Cole was able to rack the charging handle and was about to move out when the akimbo-FMG9 kid jumped out a window, doing a 1080 spin and spraying bullets everywhere with his FMG9s, wrecking Cole's shit and punting Scootaloo off the map where she died and respawned next to Cole.

"What the heck was that?!" Scoots asked, referring to the FMG9s/punting/dying in midair and respawning.

"I'll explain it all later; right now we gotta kill this FMG9 kid" the human replied, running forward

Sprinting down the glass hallway in the middle of the map Cole met the FMG9 kid, opening fire on him with his UMP and failing because the UMP was firing 3 rounds per minute because some dumbass didn't put Rapid Fire on it.

"FUCK!"

Respawning Cole whipped the UMP off the map and it came back around like a boomerang and hit him in the face, knocking him on his back where the FMG9 kid came down and owned his shit before teabagging him.

Spawning once again the uB3r-l33T b0$$ switched to the RPG and soon found the FMG9 kid, firing both RPG rockets at him and watching as they flew straight and true right before they hit him where they then veered off course and exploded in mid-air.

At first Col3 was going to call hax but then he remembered that the RPG-7 sucked fucking shit and barely hit anything except floors and walls, and even then you were still lucky if the rockets hit even those.

Ducking down before the storm of bullets from the FMG9s could kill him C0le pulled out the UMP and fired at the kid, who was sprinting to the left to flank him and in doing so dodged all his bullets because, once again, the UMP's rate of fire sucked dicks without Rapid Fire.

The FMG9 kid neared him and Cole was about shoot him with the UMP, knowing he could not miss at such a close range, when the kid lunged 9000 feet and knifed him in the foot, killing him instantly.

"FUCK YOU ROBERT BOWLING!" C0l3 screamed when he respawned, cursing MW3's lead designer for taking out the Commando perk but leaving in its abilities like 9000 feet knife lunges. Might as well have left the fucking perk in the game.

Pulling up the pause menu Cole looked over the other Custom Classes available to him:

Firepower: UMP45 and RPG-7, which is the one he is currently using, much to his dismay.

Ultimate shit: M16A4 with no Rapid Fire and FMG9 with holographic sight.

Cock blow: FAD and MP5, both with Hybrid Sight(no, not the HAMR scope, standard hybrid.)

Kill nothing: AA12 silenced and no secondary(somehow.)

You suck: MG36 with ACOG and a SPAS-12 silenced(Overkill Pro for the win.)

Orville Redenbacher(lolwut): frag grenades only.

U suk(again): Riot shield.

"Well, I'm fucked" C0i3 lamented, selecting Ultimate Shit knowing that he could do well with the M16. Upon selecting the class and he saw that the FMG9 kid had killed him a bunch of times and called in a MOAB, dropping that shit on the map and killing him again. Now he was EMP'ed and would be forced to play in the red haze.

Oh, joy.

Sprinting forward Cole saw the FMG9 kid teabagging his dead body and sighted in, struggling to find his target through the clusterfuck that was the iron sights. Finally aiming on the FMG9 kid c0l3 pulled the trigger and was forced to wait three days before pulling it again, failing to kill the kid because his FMG9s ate the bullets and shit them out.

The FMG9 kid then raped him again.

"FUCK!1one! I just can not kill this cocksucker!" the Boss declared, respawning the cluttered fuckzone that was the side of the map that had the crane and other construction shit on it.

Suddenly an eerie light filled the map and the ghostly form of Captain Price came down, handing Cole a silenced MP5 with Kick and a SMAW, confusing the boss MW3 player.

"What? You tried to kill me! Why are you helping me? Why are you here? Why am I bringing you back? Oh yeah, I'm a bad writer who had to put himself into one of his own stories in an attempt to make it interesting" Cole declared.

"There are plans that have been put in motion that are bigger than this game, bigger than the FMG9 kid who's secretly gay but will deny it to the end, and bigger than me or you. And the universe will need you to stop these plans. Remember what I said in MW2: history is written by the victor" Price explained, floating back up into the air. As he slowly ascended Cole watched thousands of bullets flying through him, being fired by the FMG9 kid.

"Who the heck was that?" Scootaloo asked, Cole having forgotten she was even with him. The little Pegasus filly was hiding in a trashcan next to the spawn.

"Captain Price, Call of Duty legend, and totally better than Victor Reznov. Suck on that one, Kirlia and Blackburn" Cole explained, looking the MP5 over. "And apparently he believes I need to kill this FMG9 bozo with this MP5 because the universe needs me for some horseshit."

Running out of the spawn Cole met the FMG9 in the middle of the map, sighting in and firing on him with the MP5. Time slowed down like in Mass Effect's Adrenaline Rush or Grand Theft Auto III's weird pill thing that I can't remember the name of. As the first few bullets left the barrel of the MP5 Cole took a hit from the FMG9s, flinching upward and throwing his aim off, forcing him to drag the MP5 down to get back on target. Time slowed down even more and bullets slowly soared through the air, both shooters spraying bullets everywhere.

Deciding his FMG9s wouldn't work the kid lunged forward with his knife, looking to stab Cole to end this stupid engagement. As he soared across the walkway Cole continued to pump bullets at him, his ammo counter slowly emptying as poorly rendered shell casings scattered across the floor.

Suddenly, as the last bullet left the gun, the FMG9 kid flopped over, his FMG9s clattering to the floor as his corpse fell off the edge of the map. The kid screaming "ZOMG u fuking gay hacker i hope u get raped and ur family dies and u hav to sell ur xbox 2 pay da billz u queer" on his way down.

Cole had killed a player that was in the middle of Commando lunging him.

Dropping the MP5 to the floor the b0ss slowly looked around as Scootaloo came up to him, asking if he had won. Cole nodded and said "I think it's time we got out of here, Scoots."

The two warped back to The Hub and took a break, Cole thinking about what Captain Price had said and wondering if it meant anything.

*-*-*

*This is a reference to my beta-reader's story, Call of Duty: Moderately Predictable Warfare.

**According to my sources this is actually true... God fucking help us all...

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I think you like this story. So leave a review, maybe?(fucking hate that song, by the way.)

Oh my God, I remember just how much I fucking hate this part: Scootaloo and all related characters belong to Hasbro. Cole belongs to me(obviously). Captain Price and related characters belong to Infinity Ward and Activision.