I'm Sorry, Monochromatic, This Honestly Turned Out a Lot Worse Than I Thought It Would
Arlight, listen up fuckfaces! Today is the day! The day you get a RariTwi story from yours truly, Super Trampoline! So then, without further ado, here is a shitfic!
One day, Rarity was bored. Which is pretty rare. You might even say it’s a rarity! HAHAHAhaha good God what am I doing with my life?!
She had just delivered her latest batch of dresses to the Manehattan Fashion Gala, whatever the fuck that is, probably something to do with fashion and overpriced dresses. She had a few hours to kill. Look at her, so successful! Good for her. She should be proud! Unlike me. What have I accomplished? I mean, I guess I’ve gotten some homeless friends off the street. I should feel good about that. But I’m 27, probably roughly her age in the show now, and I’ve not really done much with my life. And everyday I feel like shit for that. But enough about me. This is about Rarity and Twilight Sparkle being lovey dovey and shit. This is a “no negative vibes” zone! Vibe check! Oh, you better believe Rarity has lots of vibes. She is a lady who knows what she wants when it comes to pleasure.
Anyway, Rarity was kicking it in her hotel room at the Manehattan Luxury uh… shitty horse pun for a hotel name, when suddenly her room phone rang.
Now, you may be saying to yourself, “self, what the fuck, ponies don’t have phones. This is inaccurate. REEEEEEEE!!!” But you are wrong, I think. Lemme check Derpibooru.
Okay, Derpibooru is no help. But let us pretend for this story at least that Rarity has a phone in her room. And it rings. Oops, now I’m in present tense. Let’s fix that.
Rarity’s phone in her manehattan hotel suite rang. She picked it up. “Y’ellow?” All white people by law are required to answer the phone by saying “Yellow?”, and I don’t see why white ponies would be any different, even sophisticated ones like Rarity. Anyway, she answered, and Twilight Sparkle, in her huskiest, most seductive voice, said “Rarity, you sexy hawt thang, I wanna frick with you.”
Now Rarity, everypony knew she loved a good shagging by a good stallion. Unfortunately, good stallions are hard to come by. But Rarity also had a thing for hawt mares, and Twilight Sparkle certainly qualified. Not only was she fairly in shape on account of having a crazy high alicorn metabolism despite a diet of mostly caffeine and hay burgers and generally too much carbs and fat, and not only was she pretty physically striking, of course being an alicorn in the prime of her not-quite-youth-anymore, she also had her shit together, at least on the surface. Rarity, being her good friend, of course knew that Twilight had a fuck-ton of responsibility riding on her shoulders and also equal fuck-ton amounts of anxiety. But she somehow kept going and got massive amounts of shit done. Now That was hot in Rarity’s eyes. So while she was more or less heteroflexible, she certainly did not turn down good mare-on-mare action. So she responded “Twilight Sparkle, you delightfully deliciously delectiful divine deitific devil, you, I want you to come up to my penthouse suite right now and eat me out for the next ninety minutes, you beautiful bastard, you!”
Twilight Sparkle had a bad habit of popping far more ADHD pills than she should have, which make you horny (I, the author, know this painfully well from past experience). Now Twilight Sparkle was already horny, on account of being an alicorn. HAHAHA that joke has NEVER been made before! Lol yes it has who am I kidding. But anyway, Twilight Sparkle was really raring to go, or Raritying to go, as it were. So she hung up the lobby phone where you could call individual rooms, because technology in Equestria was such that they had only developed short wired communication as far as voices went, so the phone only worked within that hotel. But Sweetie Belle would soon revolutionize Equestrian telecommunications, but that’s another story for another day. So anyway, Twilight Sparkle took the elevator up to Rarity’s room, which was room 576. The number 576 is special to me because it appears in a future story of mine which sadely I’m probably never going to finish because I suck at finishing things. But anyway, Twilight Sparkle, hopped up on some drug adjacent to aderall and eager to eat Rarity’s fish taco, enthusiastically knocked on Rarity’s hotel room door.
*Knock Knock Knock!*
“Who iiiiissss it, darling?” Rarity playfully singsonged.
“Oh, you know who,” replied Twilight huskily, already wet and very eager to get down to getting down.
“Mmmm, I do indeed,” replied rarity, wearing an off-white bathrobe that somehow managed to look elegant on her, because that was Rarity’s secret, she was always elegant. “Please, come in, darling,” she said, and you could taste the anticipation in the way she twisted the word darling. It was pretty hot, I’m not going to lie.
Anyway, so Twilight Sparkle trotted into Rarity’s room, and you could taste the passion rolling off of each other. The dressmaker on the top of her game at the top of her empire, and the alicorn soon to be in charge of literally all of Equestria, both fairly in shape and sexy by miniature technicolor horse standards. Twilight nibbled Rarity’s neck, and Rarity shivered with anticipation. “Please, Twilight, fuck me on these sweet satin sheets. I want to make love to you, my dearest friend and soon-to-be paramore. Fuck me, Twilight, Fuck me.” And the way she said it, well, imagine one of the hottest and most successful mares in Equestria asking you to fuck her! I’m sure if you had even the smallest of attraction to mares, you would eagerly do her bidding.
And Twilight Sparkle certainly liked mares. So she carefully used her magic to remove her regalia, while Rarity sexily slipped from her bathrobe, and Twilight pushed her down onto the soft bed sheet fabric. “Oh, Rarity, you are such a dirty girl, my little pony.” Rarity pretty much melted at this.
And then Twilight Sparkle ate her out for the next ninety minutes. Rarity came thirteen times. She walked a bit bow-legged at the fashion gala that evening. Definitely worth it though.
I, uh, don’t have any clever way to end this story. I was trying to work in something about “cumming straight from the horse’s mouth”, but it just wasn’t happening. So, uh, I guess have a nice day? Try to be generous like Rarity and also make sure that you’re offering head to your partners if they enjoy it. Toodles!
