Chapters The Robbery of the Canterlot Mint
It was a beautiful day in Ponyville. Twilight, Spike, and their friends had decided to take full advantage of this and hold a picnic. The food, which would have been rather blasé inside, was made three times as delectable in the fresh air. After they had stuffed themselves, they each decided to rest on the trees that surrounded the area. Rainbow, Fluttershy, and Twilight each took refuge on a branch, while those who couldn’t fly resided against the trunks. Applejack chewed on a stalk of wheat, as she was so often prone to do during these types of things.
“This is the life, ain’t it?” She asked, “no cares, no worries, just a group of good friends eatin’ a great meal and then beddin’ down under the azure sky.”
“Applejack,” Twilight said, “I never took you for being poetic.”
“Poetic?” Applejack asked, “nah, hon, I’m just observin’ my surroundings. I ain’t never bothered much with that there poetry writin’.”
Twilight chuckled and then fell asleep. The warm sun inflamed her fur, and it felt wonderful to forget all about her impending ascension to the Equestrian throne. Even though her coronation was still two moons away, she found that she spent many a restless night wandering the dark corridors of her castle. Being The Princess of Friendship was one thing, but taking over for Celestia, who had ruled for over a thousand years and was beloved of everypony, was a completely different prospect.
A few hours passed, and the group snoozed in contentment. Then, when the chilly air of eventide began to press through their manes, they awoke and realized how late it had gotten. Thankfully, it was Sunday, and all of their various occupations were slow that day. Rarity had closed her boutique for the day, and Pinkie had been let off from Sugarcube Corner. Rainbow Dash’s weather pattern had been set hours beforehand, and Applejack knew her farm was in good hooves between Big Mac and Apple Bloom. Fluttershy had proclaimed an “Animal Health Day” at her sanctuary, and all day long Dr. Fauna had been giving checkups to her beloved pets.
“Whew, doggy,” AJ said when they had packed up their things and were heading back to town, “I needed this more’n I realized.”
Twilight smiled as she walked at the head of the group. “You know, I don’t know what I’d do without you girls. It’s gonna be…difficult to move to Canterlot in two moons.”
“Darling, you aren’t kidding!” Rarity said, “I’ve been trying my hardest not to think about what’s going to happen after that.”
“Yeah, me too,” Dash said, “I mean, you’ve lived here for years, Twilight. We’ve gone on countless adventures together, and we’ve battled so many villains. I just can’t believe it’s all gonna end soon.”
“Aw, now, why’d y’all have to go on like that?” AJ asked, “I mean, we were havin’ such a nice time, and now you had to go gallivantin’ through the fields of sentiment!”
“I thought you liked sentiment, Applejack,” Dash said snidely.
“I do, but only at appropriate times. I mean, can’t we save all the weepin’ and howlin’ and such fer when Twilight actually MOVES to Canterlot? Don’t do no good to cry right now, does it?”
The ponies all nodded and voiced their agreement. They realized that they still had two wonderful moons left with their beloved friend, and they needed to make the most of them. Twilight’s spirit felt warm and soothed as they arrived back at her castle, because her friends had ensured that they would always be together. She knew their friendships were rock solid, and nothing in the world could ever break them.
The next morning, Twilight awoke and went to the kitchen for her traditional mug of tea. It helped relax and ready her for the day ahead. She shook out her mane a little bit and magically picked up the cup. Her sips were small and rather polite, even though nopony else was there. You have to practice royal etiquette every chance you get, she told herself, repeating the mantra Celestia and Luna had said.
“PAPER!” Came Spike’s sudden shout. It startled Twilight so much that she spilled hot tea all over her chest. She raced to the sink and ran cool water on it, reveling in the feeling of relief that it brought. That dragon, she thought as her mind turned to her assistant, I’m gonna have a talk with him about shouting in the castle so much.
Spike suddenly appeared in Twilight’s doorway with a shocked look on his face. Twilight turned to meet him. “Spike, listen. You know I love you like a brother, but you can’t yell all over the grounds like that! I spilled tea on my chest, and now it’s probably burned!”
She got no response from the dragon.
“Hey! Are you listening to me?!”
“Twilight…” he said, “…this is much bigger than spilled tea.”
These cryptic words peaked the inquisitive princess’s curiosity and she trotted over to where Spike held the latest issue of the Ponyville Gazette. She scooted herself next to him and read the headline. Her mouth also fell open as the capitalized title assaulted her eyes. “CANTERLOT MINT ROBBED! 500 MILLION BITS STOLEN!”
“WHAT?!” She screamed into Spike’s ear.
He rubbed his head a bit and gave her a look. “What was that you were saying about yelling over the grounds?”
“Forget it, Spike! This is huge! This is bigger than anything! I mean, the Canterlot Mint is the biggest bank in Equestria! Everypony in Canterlot, and everypony in the surrounding towns keeps their money there! If it was robbed, then that means…the very economic and social foundations of our nation are crumbling! Soon, there could be all manner of things! Anarchy, mobs, fires, murders! HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP!”
“Twilight, snap out of it!” Spike said as he grabbed onto his frightened friend, “I thought you said you were gonna cut down on the freak outs!”
“But this is so close to my coronation! I mean, what the hell would I do if I were to be crowned as ruler and then immediately have to deal with this?! I’ll lose it! I’LL LOSE IT!”
“Sh…” Spike said calmly as he pulled her into a hug, “it’s okay. We’ll get through this, but only if we do it together.”
Twilight realized that he was right and she snapped back into sanity. She remembered everything she had learned about friendship in all the years she had lived in Ponyville, and she found comfort in the memories. She felt that, with her friends at her side, she could face anything, even something as horrible as the complete destruction of what essentially amounted to the Equestrian stock market.
“Okay, Spike,” she said, “what does the article say?”
“Hm…let me see. It says, duh-duh-duh-duh, oh, police say that at 1:00 yesterday morning, a security guard caught the shadow of somepony lurking in the bank vault, duh-duh-duh-duh, the guard says that the shadow was tall and lanky and…uh-huh…”
“And what?! And what?!”
“…and it seemed to move in a graceful fashion. By the time he went in to investigate, the shadow had moved away…and all the money had gone with it. It also says that the prime suspect in the case is……Princess Celestia!”
The Robbery of the Canterlot Mint
Twilight and her friends ran into the castle in Canterlot. After they had all read the article in the paper, they decided to go and show their support for Celestia. Tears threatened to blind the young princess, but she fought them off. She had to remain strong for her mentor and closest confidante. She and Celestia held such a close relationship, that tabloid newspapers in Canterlot and the surrounding towns often referred to them as being romantically involved. They had repeatedly denied these allegations, but the rumors persisted.
Now, that close bond was being put into severe jeopardy. The strains of crime had battered the foundations of the core of Equestria, and Twilight knew that it was up to her and her friends to try and save it. They ran into the throne room, trying desperately to get through the large crowd of press ponies who had jammed inside. They were all taking pictures of what was going on at the front of the room, but no questions were being shouted. They were all in shock at what was going on. Princess Celestia was being formally arrested for the crime.
When Twilight and her friends finally arrived at the front of the crowd, they found it difficult to look at the sight. Celestia had been stripped of her royal emblems and diadem and was being paraded out of the room in chains. Her wings had been locked in special holders, and a magic shield had been placed over her horn. Her hooves were cuffed, and she had a very sad look on her face. Twilight saw the liquid dribbling out of the disgraced ruler’s eyes, and she knew that her mentor felt as if all Equestria had betrayed her.
Twilight also noticed Dragnet Decoder, the chief of the Canterlot police force, standing by. He was attempting to look tough and hardened against the mob of photographers, but she could tell that he was holding back a torrent of emotions. It was well known that he and Celestia were very good friends, and his heart was torn in twain. But he had to make the arrest, because his duty to the ponies of Equestria demanded him to do so.
Twilight trotted up to him. “Dragnet?”
He turned to her, eyes watering behind the thick shades that hid them. “Hey, there, kid,” he said, using his special nickname for Twilight. He had known her since she was a filly and he was a colt. He and Shining Armor had been her only friends in the world and she had continued their relationship even after he graduated from the Police Pony Academy and she was sent off to Ponyville. Their letters were frequent, but never went beyond friendship.
“You had to…didn’t you?” She asked, referring to the arrest.
“Yes,” he said in a shaky voice. “Twilight…I never dreamed this day would come. Not even in my worst nightmares did I think that I’d be forced to arrest my beloved princess. I had to watch them put her gentle wings in those terrible holders, and the same hooves that weaved friends together were put in bondage. This is the darkest day in Equestrian history, kid, and I don’t know if we’ll recover.”
“I believe we will,” a new voice said.
The two ponies turned to see Princesses Luna and Cadance standing there. It was Luna who had made the declaration, and both ponies were smiling. Twilight found it peculiar that they both showed such happy expressions as their leader was being hauled to prison. But she shook off the feeling and offered the customary bow between princesses. When they bowed back, she trotted over and hugged Cadance tightly. For a moment, she could be a filly again and revel in the feeling of Cadance’s tender love and motherliness.
“Oh, come on, Twilight,” Cadance said, “cheer up. Equestria will grow stronger than it ever has been. I know that Celestia’s arrest and crime has been a shock to the nation, but I promise that we will become stronger.”
“Not without her, we won’t,” Twilight said sadly, “she was the rock that stabilized everypony else. She was the one who carried Equestria through its roughest thousand years. She was the one who taught me everything I know about magic and a lot about friendship! She was everything to me and to Equestria, and now she’s gone!”
“Twilight,” Luna said, “my dear sister had her flaws. We all do. It’s just unfortunate that she chose to display said flaws by robbing the largest bank in Equestria.”
Twilight just couldn’t believe the nonchalance her two friends were expressing. After all, one of their closest and dearest companions had just been arrested for a horrible crime. She had been accused of forcibly embezzling nearly every pony in Canterlot and its suburbs, and all they could sit there and do was smile and chat like nothing had happened! She became angry with them and turned to face her friends.
“Listen, everypony! Princess Celestia could not have done this terrible deed.”
“I’m with ya on that, sugar cube,” Applejack drawled, “but how the hell are we gonna clear her name? I mean, we’re just simple ponies from Ponyville!”
“Yeah, AJ’s right,” Rainbow Dash said, “I mean, there are ponies who go to school for years to learn how to be detectives.”
“Oh, darling, there’s nothing to being a detective,” Rarity quipped, “all you have to do is-“
“Wear the right outfit?”
“Oh, ha-ha, you’re so droll,” Rarity said sarcastically.
“Listen, everypony,” Twilight said, “this is no time to be snarky with each other, and it’s also no time to question things. Our friendship has seen us through very difficult times in the past, and this is no different. In fact, this may be the most difficult thing we’ve ever faced. If we don’t clear Celestia’s name, then Equestria won’t be as strong as it once was. We’re open to attack by any number of villains right now. As soon as they hear that Celestia’s been incarcerated, they’ll be on top of us! We cannot let that happen. Equestria needs all of its leaders, especially her. We need to keep morale up while we conduct our own investigation. Come on, everypony! Let’s go clear Celestia’s name!”
The Robbery of the Canterlot Mint
Inside The Canterlot Mint
Twilight and her friends trotted up to where the police had roped off the crime scene. It appeared as if somepony had smashed in the back window to the bank and then forced the vault open. The officers and detectives scurried about the room, trying desperately to find anything that might help lead them to the culprit. So Twilight trotted up to one of them and, when they saw just who it was, they let the group through. The princess and her friends saw the shocked looks on the faces of the investigators, and she trotted up to the pony in charge. It was an old friend of hers, who had recently joined the force: Moon Dancer.
“Hello, my old friend,” Twilight said.
“Twilight!” Moon said as she embraced her, “er…I mean…Your Majesty.”
“Oh, come now, Moon. You know you can call me by my first name.”
Moon smiled sheepishly. “I know I can in private, but it’s against department regulations to refer to our superiors as anything other than their title in public. So, just roll with me on this, okay?”
Twilight rolled her eyes, but nodded in agreement. “Fine. Now, then, we’re here to help clear Celestia’s name. She couldn’t have done this.”
“I wish I could be as biased as you are, Your Majesty,” Moon responded sadly, “but I am sworn to uphold the law, and if all the clues here point to Princess Celestia, then I am bound by that oath to throw the book at her.”
Twilight’s face fell a bit, but she quickly straightened it. She understood the solemn duty that Moon Dancer had to perform as a member of the police department, and she was thankful to have such a fair and honest pony on the force. She knew Canterlot was in good hooves as long as ponies like Moon Dancer were employed as officers. “So, what do you have so far?” She asked.
“Come on,” Moon said as she led Twilight and her friends over to a small table. There were a few clues sitting there, and she’d been studying them exorbitantly over the past couple of hours. Clue A was a small tuft of fur, which appeared to be white. “As you know, Princess Celestia’s coat is white,” Moon explained.
“Yeah, but there are other white ponies out there,” Applejack pointed out, “I mean, look at Rarity. She’s whiter than a snowstorm!”
“Oh, hardy-har-har,” Rarity said sarcastically, “you and Rainbow are just SCREAMS today, aren’t you?”
“Will the three of you be quiet and listen?” Twilight asked, before turning to Moon Dancer. “I must admit that my farming friend makes a good point. How can you be sure it was Celestia based solely on this tuft of fur?”
Moon Dancer shook her head and pointed to Clue B: a small strand of hair that appeared to be both pink and green at the same time. “There’s only one pony I know that has hair that can be multiple colors at the same time. Not even Princesses Luna and Cadance can claim that. No, this strand had to have come from Princess Celestia’s mane.”
“Oh, fiddlesticks!” Applejack said, “couldn’t somepony have simply dyed green into a pink mane or vice versa in order to get that there effect?”
“I suppose,” Moon Dancer said, “but we have to go with what we know when we make an arrest, and this strand pointed to Princess Celestia. But the biggest clue of all…is Clue C.”
She pointed to Clue C, which was a piece of fine gold with the royal crest emblazoned on it. Twilight would know that symbol anywhere. It was a raging sun and a peaceful pony, which represented the link that Celestia held between righteous fury and beautiful love. It was so mysterious and awe inspiring that many books had been written on this crest alone. Nopony knew where it came from, and Celestia had kept it a carefully guarded secret.
“Celestia’s…crest!” Twilight choked out.
“It sure looks like it,” Moon said sadly, and then put a hoof on Twilight. “Look, Twilight, as the lead detective of the Canterlot Police Department, it’s my job to catch the bad ponies and lock them in jail. But if I may speak as your friend for a moment…I just don’t buy this. I can’t see Celestia, the gentle and kind ruler of all Equestria, robbing ponies of the bits that they worked so hard to obtain. You know she’s always lenient with taxes.”
“Moon’s right,” Dash said, “I mean, she’s always doing what’s best for everypony. Why the hell would she do something like this?”
Twilight didn’t have an answer, even though she wished with all her heart that she did. As she sat there among the few remaining bits in the vault, she felt a new and very sinister feeling creep over her psyche. What if she did do this? She asked herself, I mean, I don’t want to believe that, and I’m NOT gonna believe it, but…what if it’s true? What if all of our morale and encouragement to each other in these last few hours has been for naught? What if…?
“Twilight,” a soft voice interrupted her thoughts, “what do we do now?”
Twilight turned and saw Fluttershy standing there with a worried face. Her timid friend’s wings were outspread, and she looked as if she had been mulling over the same questions Twilight had. “I don’t know, Fluttershy,” the princess sighed, “if we’re wrong, and I hope and pray that we’re not wrong, then I may be forced to take Equestria’s throne sooner than scheduled. But I’m not concerned about that. It’s the fact that this crime comes with a life sentence for anypony involved. If Celestia is forced into prison until she dies, it will crush everypony. They believe in her, and I’m nervous that the position of princess will be tarnished forever.”
“Hey, everypony!” Rainbow Dash said, “look!”
Twilight turned to where Dash was pointing her hoof at the white tuft of fur. A small part of it seemed to be discolored, almost as if it were forged. It looked slightly darker than the rest of it, and almost seemed to take on a light pink hue. “Um…is anypony else seeing what I’m seeing?” Rarity asked.
“It looks like a fake!” Rainbow said, “Ha! This proves Celestia didn’t do it!”
“No, it doesn’t, Rainbow Dash,” Twilight said, “this only proves that we have a discolored piece of fur on our hooves. Even Celestia’s fur can have impurities and imperfections. But it is a start. We just have to keep building on this foundation until we have enough evidence to defend Celestia in court. Come on, everyone!”
With that, everypony began searching through the vault for more clues. They were determined to clear their beloved friend’s name, and set things right in Equestria once again. After all, they had faced odds that were much more insurmountable than these and come out on top. All they needed was a repeat performance.
The Robbery of the Canterlot Mint
Author's Note
Hey, everyone! I hope you've enjoyed the story so far! Now it's time to meet the dastardly figures behind the Canterlot bank robbery. Of course, I'm not identifying who they are just yet, but hopefully this will give you a peek into their personalities and motivations. As always, happy reading!
The Villainous Mares
“Damn it! Damn it all to Celestia spewing Tartarus,” a voice said in the darkness. It carried a rough edge to it, and it sounded fairly feminine. It also sounded extremely authoritative, but also carried a light gentleness that could be used to devastating effect. “You and your fucking fur!” The evil voice cursed, “you just had to go in there without ensuring that the spell was foolproof! You just had to! Now, we’re up a creek with no paddles, because you didn’t double check the incognito incantation! You fool!”
“Will you calm down?!” A second feminine voice asked, “I got the job done, didn’t I? Five hundred million bits…all ours!”
“Yes, you got the job done, but you might have done us in at the same time! I mean, really, leaving poofy tufts of fur and tiny strands of your mane everywhere! Did you learn nothing from our private criminal classes?!”
The second pony shook out her mane a bit and gave her companion a look. Even though it was dark in their secret hideout, she could tell that her fellow criminal was not exactly pleased with her performance. The sharp glare that emanated from the shadows on the other side of the room spoke of the despisal that came from there.
“Oh, come on,” the second pony said, “why don’t you stop glaring at me?”
“Because you weren’t supposed to leave any evidence behind! You said you could get ‘in and out, like a shadow.’ But now look at us! Just look!”
The pony turned and looked around a bit, but saw nothing except the sarcastically prancing figure of her companion. “Oh, we can do this!” The first pony said with biting fakery as she darted about the room, “we can be the most wonderful and amazing criminal duo in Equestria. Then everypony will HAVE to take us seriously! We can get revenge on Celestia and Twilight in one fell swoop, by making them look like fools!” She stopped and scoffed in the second pony’s direction. “You do realize that we still have to rob the First Ponyville Bank and blame it on Twilight, right? I’m not sure you can do it!”
“Oh, I can do it. I’ll be as quiet as a mouse, and I promise I won’t let you down.”
“I’m not the only one you’re letting down!” The first pony said angrily, “you’re letting yourself down because you’ve forgotten our motivation.”
Now it was the second mare’s turn to be upset. She and her friend had pulled numerous small jobs around Equestria, blaming them on high level ponies and leaving behind evidence that would support their story. When they came forward, nopony questioned them. Nopony would ever think that they were the true masterminds of this devious plot. Their endgame was just around the corner, and she knew that it was everything she had ever wanted. She wanted to rule Equestria alongside her friend. This plot would get rid of everypony in their way, and as the jails filled with innocent “guilty” parties, they’d simply waltz into the throne room and take over Canterlot.
“I have NOT forgotten our motivation!” She huffed, “I know that we’re in this for money, power, and glory. But most of all, I know that we’re in this for revenge. You have your reasons, and I have mine. The common denominator here is our spitting hatred for Celestia and Twilight. Ugh! I should have killed that purple Alicorn when I had the chance!”
The first pony smiled evilly and put a hoof on the second mare’s shoulder. “Patience, my dear, patience. You’ll get your chance to kill her, I promise. I, for one, cannot wait for the day when Twilight and Celestia are BOTH behind bars and we’ll have full access to them. Once there…”
She broke into a fit of evil laughter and was quickly joined by her companion. Their shrieks echoed throughout the chamber. It was almost haunting, as if the ghosts of thousands of dead ponies had risen through the rafters of the basement below them and added their voices to the raucous merriment. The two ponies were possessed with an idea of revenge and power, and they were willing to go to any length to get it.
The first pony felt as if she had been personally wronged by Celestia. She always thought she was a good pony, but when she asked for a better life, Celestia punished her. She found the ruling unjust and unfair, and now her plans for revenge were finalized. All I wanted was something more than the horrid cards I’d been dealt by life. Always being overlooked by everypony, and always being ignored. Meanwhile, other ponies kissed asses, and Celestia was the biggest ass kisser of all! I’m gonna show everypony what a truly strong mare is, and nopony will stop me!
The second pony was enraged at Twilight, the gentle Alicorn who represented friendship throughout the land. She thought that Twilight’s princess title and her rhetoric were shallow and ill conceived. But even more than that, she found that Twilight’s friendliness was helping everypony else, which she hated. She hated everypony, even though she tried really hard to put on a face of beauty and kindness. I can’t wait to be able to come out of the shell and show everypony who I truly am! They’ll quickly forget about Celestia and Twilight and bow to us! I shall rule Equestria with an iron hoof, and nopony will be able to escape me! I shall cast spells that will benefit my own beauty at the expense of every mare! No mare shall be able to say that she is more beautiful than me! Even more than that, all the stallions in Equestria will come to me to satisfy their love and lust! I shall be drowning in them!
“Hey!” The first mare said, cutting into the second one’s thoughts, “are you thinking what I’m thinking?”
“Oh, you wanna have some fun,” the second one said suggestively. Not only were they criminals and best friends, but they were also lustful bed mates. They didn’t consider themselves lovers, but their shared goal of conquest and totalitarianism caused their bodies to shake. They wanted each other, and they wanted Equestria, and they were more than happy to be physical in another sickening shared celebration.
The Robbery of the Canterlot Mint
Twilight sat on a dais along with Princesses Luna and Cadance. To the left side of the courtroom sat the prosecuting team, headed up by the very best attorney in Canterlot, Common Law. He wasn’t known to lose cases very often, and they said he had a way of swaying juries. Thankfully, since this was a royal offense, Equestrian law demanded that the offending princess be tried by her fellow princesses. So there was no jury, and Twilight demanded complete fairness of herself. The only issue here was that the defendant was none other than her close friend and beloved mentor, Princess Celestia.
The purple pony felt sick when she looked to the right side of the courtroom and saw Celestia decked out in prison regalia. She looked so utterly defeated and tired. She bore scars from where her fellow inmates had beaten her, and her kind eyes betrayed the pain in her soul. Twilight could feel the disgraced and disowned ruler’s heart crying out for justice and mercy, and she swore to herself that she was going to do everything in her power to ensure that both were done. She wanted to be fair, but the thought of hearing the gavel bang down on a guilty verdict tore her spirit in twain.
I swear, she said to Celestia silently, I will uphold the law. I will perform my duty as an honest and just princess. If the evidence we’ve found is all we have to go on, you will be guilty. Oh, but I don’t want you to be! I love you as I do my own mother, Celestia! You’re my best friend!
She sent out a silent plea to her friends, who were still working hard gathering evidence at the bank, to find something that might acquit their beloved leader. She knew that if no further clues were uncovered that might point the hoof of misdeed at somepony else, then she and her fellow leaders would have no choice but to find their own guilty. It would permanently scar the relationship between the ponies and their princesses. Twilight’s stomach churned as she thought of every lesson learned about friendship being tossed aside by everypony in favor of tearing them down.
“Order! Order!” Luna called as she banged the gavel, “order in this courtroom! Now, then. This is case number 45689-B, Canterlot Mint vs. Princess Celestia, whom will be referred to forthwith as simply, Celestia. Counselor Common Law, please present your opening statement.”
Common Law approached the bench with a smug smile on his face. It was well known among the attorneys of Canterlot that he was only in this for the bits. He was considered an extremely greedy, miserly pony, and he would often stoop to low methods of attack in order to win a case. After all, he only got paid if he won. The Equestrian Bar Rules stated so, and he was not about to violate them. Sure, some of his tactics were harsh, but they were all legal.
“Your Majesties, great ones of Equestria, I thank you for hearing this case today,” he began, “for it is a case, not just of great importance to my client, The Canterlot Mint, but also to the very office of princess itself…”
As Common Law continued his opening statement, Twilight’s friends darted around the vault, trying desperately to find anything that might help Celestia out of her predicament. Twilight’s final words to them had been something of a command. “Find anything that could turn things around for her,” she had said firmly.
“Here!” Pinkie Pie said, “I found something!”
“What did you find, darling?” Rarity asked as she trotted over to her.
“I found a bit!”
The others groaned. As much as they loved Pinkie, she could be a little distracting when it came to serious affairs. “Come on, Pinkie! Quit horsin’ around,” Applejack said.
“AJ’s right,” Dash affirmed, “we don’t have a lot of time! The trial’s probably already started, and we don’t have a single damn clue! We just need one clue!”
Meanwhile, Moon Dancer was turning the discolored tuft of fur over in her hooves. She knew she had seen this particular shade of pink on somepony recently, but she couldn’t figure out who it was. It’s an incognito spell, the knowledgeable unicorn thought, I’d bet my life and my detective license on it. But whomever put it on themselves didn’t do a very good job. I mean, really. Even the most basic level unicorn can do a simple disguise. All it takes is a little concentration to keep up the illusion.
She was befuddled as to the source of the fur. On the one hoof, it looked as if it were somepony with a very small mental capacity. A good incognito incantation lasted for a day, and this fur had discolored within hours of the robbery. So, it would appear that they were dealing with somepony very inexperienced when it came to magic. But on the other hoof, the entire plan of breaking into the most secure vault in Equestria was extremely elaborate. Only two ponies had access to the vault: Princess Celestia and the bank manager, and he had been cleared hours before.
“UGH! I just don’t get it!” Moon finally yelled, causing everypony to stop and trot over to her, “I keep going over scenario after scenario in my head, and I can’t find one that makes any kind of sense!”
“What do you mean?” Dash asked.
“Look at this fur. It’s all discolored, and the incognito spell that was placed upon it is dissolving quickly. It looks like it’s half-pink and half-white. We could try and rule out Celestia based solely on this, but we also have to consider the strands of mane and gold necklaces we’ve found. They all bear her marks. The issue here is that the pony who performed this magic spell should be very inexperienced when it comes to such things, but they would also have to be smart enough to get in here. I just can’t figure it out!”
“I found something!” A shrill voice suddenly sang out.
The ponies all turned to where Pinkie had moved away from the group and was digging through a pile of the remaining bits. They all groaned again as they thought she was joking. “Pinkie, we don’t have time for this!” Rarity said, “I swear to Celestia, if you found another bit-“
Rarity was quick to shut her mouth when she saw what Pinkie had found. It was no bit. It was a very important clue. She yelled for Moon Dancer and the others to trot over and see it. When they did, their mouths fell open. “Why…this…is…” Moon began
“…I know,” Rarity said as they picked the object up, “this could blow the entire case wide open.”
The Robbery of the Canterlot Mint
“It’s a wedding ring!” Pinkie announced.
The others took a look and groaned as, once again, their pink friend had stated the completely obvious. She had a rather peculiar knack for doing so, but they also knew that she had a similar ability to predict the future. None of them said it, but they all secretly felt that she could be the most valuable pony on the investigative force. If she could tell them what was going to happen next, they wouldn’t need to second guess on anything. So, they all silently agreed to put up with her quirkiness for the good of their friendship and their investigation.
“The only question is…who does it belong to?” Dash asked.
“I don’t know,” Moon Dancer said, “but I do know this. When it’s presented in court, the case against Celestia will be squashed. She’s not married! Rarity, you and Rainbow take this and get yourselves to the courtroom as fast as your hooves can carry you. This can help set the Princess free!”
Rarity and Rainbow both grinned widely and the fashionista magically took the band. They dashed out of the Mint and towards the castle and its courtroom. Their hooves pounded the cobblestones without mercy as they galloped their hearts out. They knew that they held the key to Celestia’s freedom in their grasp, and they were not about to let their friend down. She had done so much for them and given of herself so many times. She had been benevolent and kind. She had shown them mercy and compassion when they did not deserve it. Now, it was their turn to save her.
“Come on, Dash! We’ve just got to get there before Luna, Cadance, and Twilight pass judgment! We’re running out of time!”
“I’m on it!” Dash said as she grabbed the ring in her mouth.
“Hey, just what do you think you’re doing?!”
“Saving time!” Dash said as she took off into the skies above…
…Meanwhile, in the courtroom, Celestia had taken the stand in her own defense. She had heard the testimonies of the security guards who bore witness to the robbery, and it had created a level of sadness and despair within her heart that nearly broke her. Tears rolled down her face before she began to speak. She looked around the courtroom and saw so many familiar and bitterly disappointed faces. Even the plaintiff, Banker Bit, looked like he was about to weep. What nopony knew was that she and the bank manager were secret lovers.
Oh, my dear, darling Banker Bit. If only we could elude the pursuit of injustice that has so easily beset our loving relationship. But my love for you remains as strong as it ever has been. I do not blame you for this, for I see the pain that is engulfing you as well. You know I did not do this, yet you sit there and go along with it because the evidence all points to me. You have no choice here. This bludgeoning by supposed facts is killing our gentle peace, and I do not know how to save it. I hope to the sun above that Twilight’s friends find something to acquit me. Perhaps then, you and I may come forward with our romance and be properly married.
“My fellow Equestrians,” she began in a shaky voice, “I do not know how things have come to pass this way. We have all heard of the evidence found in the bank vault, but I must say that I find a lot of it to be shoddy and ill constructed. A white tuft of fur could belong to anypony, yet I am accused. A small strand of mane hair that was green and pink? Well, that could have been planted there or it could have been magically tampered with. Yet, I am accused. The only piece of evidence I cannot fight against…is the recovery of some of my golden necklace. There, I am at a loss. It has my emblem on it, and the Great Seal of Equestria. It is a mark of my authority, but I also like to think of it as a mark of love.
I love everypony as if they were my own relatives. In a way…that’s exactly what all of you are. You’re like family to me, and it hurts my heart to be accused of something so heinous and unforgivable by my own brothers and sisters. I’ve always attempted to do what was best for everypony, and I do not get angry or upset very often. But to have hooves pointed at me based on a few pieces of dodgy ‘evidence’ is heartbreaking. I do not wish to sit up here and call anypony a traitor, but truly, there are those within our citizenry who have mocked the office that my sister and I have worked so hard to dignify. They are the ones who committed this terrible crime, and if I could, I would catch them and punish them myself. But as it is, I have been stripped of my princess title…and now it is up to others to see that I am justified. Thank you.”
She turned and looked at Luna, and it was all that the Princess of the Moon could do to fight back her tears. The sisters shared a brief moment of warm, silent love. The respect and care that they had with each other was almost too much for the room to bear. Some of the ponies began silently weeping and cursing themselves for doubting Celestia. They all remembered their love for her, and suddenly, everypony was on her side. They all desperately wanted some new piece of evidence to be found that would acquit her.
“YOUR MAJESTY!” Somepony suddenly shouted.
Gasps and small conversations erupted in the gallery as the huge double doors burst open and Rainbow Dash flew into the room, followed closely by Rarity. Twilight broke into a smile as her friends approached the bench and set something down on the table between them. Could that be something new? She asked in her head, oh, please, oh, please, be something new!
“Forgive our interruption, Your Highnesses,” Rarity said, “but we have a new piece of evidence that shall acquit Princess Celestia!”
“Objection!” Common Law suddenly yelled.
“Objection sustained,” Luna said, “what is it, Common Law?”
“I move to have this introduced evidence dismissed from the proceedings. All evidence needed to be found and properly filed before the trial began. Since it has been many hours since said trial started, I believe this to be an unfair advantage for the defendant.”
Luna’s heart sank. Just as much as anypony, she wanted her sister to be free once again. But she also saw Common Law’s point about being fair and unbiased, and she rose the gavel to order the motion. But then Twilight suddenly snatched the gavel from her magical grasp. “Princess Twilight!” Luna thundered, “I am the head of this legal body!”
“Yes, Princess Luna,” Twilight responded, “but I know Equestrian law like the back of my hoof, and Equestrian law clearly states that ALL evidence is demanded in a royal court case. If this were being held in civic court or in a town’s court, then Common Law would have a point. But since this is royal court, and the defendant’s charges are so serious, royal protocol and Equestrian statute 1456-B, Subsection 2, Paragraph 3, demand that we see every shred of evidence! Therefore, I move to table Common Law’s motion.”
“I second the motion!” Cadance quickly exclaimed.
Luna nodded, a little embarrassed at having forgotten the law, but thankful to have a friend like Twilight to remind her. “The motion to table is carried, and passed. Rarity, you and Rainbow Dash may present your new evidence.”
Rarity and Rainbow Dash proceeded to tell about the wedding ring and argued that Celestia could not possibly have committed the crime, considering her unmarried status. They also spoke of how the tuft of fur they found had discolored, leading them to believe that somepony very inexperienced with magic had attempted to disguise themselves as Celestia and walk in and rob the Mint.
“It turned a light shade of pink,” Rarity finished, “and therefore, we believe that, in light of these new findings, Princess Celestia should be exonerated of all her charges.”
Luna, Cadance, and Twilight quickly turned and whispered among themselves for a moment. Then they turned back to the expectant gallery. Everypony scooted forward on their seat, waiting for Luna’s next few words. They didn’t know if she was going to extend the trial or hand down a verdict right there. Every heart beat faster and every pair of ears was standing even straighter than usual.
Luna looked and smiled at her sister. “Fillies and gentle colts,” she said, “I am very pleased to announce that we, the Princesses of Equestria, after deliberating and considering all the evidence presented to us, do hereby find Celestia…not guilty of robbery as outlined in the Equestrian penal code.”
Celestia’s mouth fell open with joy, as she was quickly tackled by Rarity and Rainbow Dash. They hugged her until she had to ask them politely to remove themselves. “Oh, Princess Celestia!” Rarity said happily, “it’s so wonderful to have you back!”
“Yeah, it is, but…I do have one question,” Dash said, “what about your gold necklace?”
“I don’t know, Rainbow Dash,” Celestia said, “all I know is that justice was won here this day, and I never have to return to that awful pony penitentiary again. I can resume my time on the throne and continue preparing Twilight for her ascension.”
But as the happy parties celebrated, one pony looked on with anger and hatred. When the verdict was announced, Common Law’s mouth fell open in shock. He was sure that Celestia would be found guilty. All of the evidence pointed at her…all, that is…except for one small piece of gold. How? How could this all go so wrong? He asked himself, this was my case to win! HMPH! Well, if they think they’ve seen the last of old Common Law, they’ve been hoodwinked! I believe there are a couple of ponies I need to speak with…
The Robbery of the Canterlot Mint
Twilight, Moon Dancer, and an entourage of ponies all ran into a certain section of Canterlot. This was known as “The Teal Quarter,” because every roof on every home was coated in a certain pristine turquoise paint. It had been an architectural choice by the first designer that ever built there, and the next builders were so impressed by it that they all decided to make every home just like that. If you moved there or built there, you had to sign an agreement stating that you would never try to paint over your house’s roof or make it a different color. Some ponies had complained to Twilight about it, and she said she would hear them out in court, but she had been incredibly busy. Seeing the blue roofs made her blush in embarrassment, and she made a mental note to help the complainers as soon as possible.
But for now, the group had more important things to worry about. “Alright, everypony, listen up!” Twilight said, “we’re looking for Fuchsia Gallop, and we believe her to be accompanied by an accomplice. These ponies are considered magically armed and dangerous. Even though they are inexperienced when it comes to incognito spells and the like, they could still be lethal if they shoot you in the right manner. Remember, safety is our number one priority! Now, then, you’ve all been split up into teams. Teams One, Two, and Three will search the east side of the quarter, and Four, Five, and Six will search the west. Let’s move, ponies!”
The six teams quickly divided and went to search their assigned area. Team One consisted of Applejack and Rarity, Team Two was Pinkie and Fluttershy, and Team Three had Rainbow Dash and Starlight Glimmer. These six ponies made their way from home to home, knocking on doors and asking about Fuchsia. Their search seemed deader than the driest of bones until they pounded on the next to last door. “Open in the name of Her Royal Highness, Princess Celestia!” Starlight shouted authoritatively.
Suddenly, the door swung open and there stood a middle aged mare. Her coat was a rather dull shade of blue and her mane was bright orange. The contrast between the two stunned and confused everypony. She seemed to take notice, for her tired red eyes suddenly darted back and forth between them. She yawned a bit. “So sorry I took so long to get here,” she said kindly, “but I mistook your first knocks for the trees hitting my home. Anyway, what can I do for you?”
“Ma’am,” Applejack said, “we’re here representin’ the princesses and the very law itself. Have y’all ever heard of somepony named Fuchsia Gallop?”
“Fuchsia?!” The pony replied, “you mean the kind and sweet pony that lives here? Of course I’ve heard of her! She brought me cookies the other day after learning that I broke my hoof.”
She pointed downward and everypony saw the cast on her right hind leg. They immediately felt sorry for rushing the injured pony, and silently agreed to be gentler about their interrogation. “I’m so sorry to see that you’re hurt,” Starlight said compassionately, “my name’s Starlight Glimmer, and I’m a personal friend of Her Majesty, Princess Twilight. If there’s anything I or the princess can do to help, you just name it.”
“Why thank you kindly, Ms. Glimmer,” the pony replied as she smiled, “but I’m doing alright. It was a simple misstep on the stairs that led to this predicament. But the doc says I’m healing just as well as can be expected. I don’t think I’ll need any other help. But, thanks just the same…”
…Meanwhile, in another home in The Teal Quarter, a fight was raging. Three ponies were screaming so loud that the glass in every window in the home was close to shattering. Their voices overlapped as they cursed and insulted each other. Their small plan for revenge on Celestia and Twilight had been foiled by one of their own, and now their alliance was imploding from within.
“YOU PIECE OF HORSE SHIT!” The first pony, a mare named Pearl Hoof, cried out, “HOW COULD YOU?! YOU WENT IN WITH YOUR WEDDING RING ON?! YOU BITCH!”
“I DIDN’T MEAN FOR IT TO FALL OFF,” the second pony, Fuchsia Gallop, defended herself, “BUT YOU! LEAVING MAGIC RESIDUE FOR ALL THE WORLD TO FIND! I DON’T THINK I’M THE ONLY DUMBASS IN THIS GROUP!”
“WILL THE TWO OF YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP?!” The third pony, a stallion and the leader of the ruffians, screamed, “I need this time to think of a backup plan! We have all the money we need, but what we don’t have is a chained Celestia! We can’t absolve the royal government and rule Equestria with iron hooves without a chained Celestia! UGH! Fuchsia, how could you have left your wedding ring there?!”
Fuchsia, a very pretty pony with blue eyes and a dark purple coat, snorted at him. “Oh, shut up, you pathetic waste of space. I did what I had to, and that was disguise myself as Celestia and help break into the vault. I accomplished my mission! Did you…....Common Law?!”
“Of course I did! I blasted that moronic ruler in court!” The crooked attorney said, “she should’ve been on her way to The Pony Penitentiary to live out the rest of her days, or worse! UGH! But that piece of garbage, Twilight, just had to admit your wedding ring, Fuchsia Gallop!”
Fuchsia gritted her teeth as she prepared to get physical. She bunched her muscles together and gave Common Law a horrific look. She screamed and charged…
…Twilight and her team sat with very bored looks on their faces. They had run into Magnifying Glass, a pony obsessed with mysteries and everything to do with them. He was generally a kind, friendly soul, but he was in the middle of talking their ears off about his latest novel. He was telling them the tale of “Grass Roots and the Movement of Madness,” and his descriptions were very…er…descriptive.
“Look, Magnifying Glass,” Twilight said, “I hate to interrupt, but we need to ask you something.”
“Of course, my dear Princess!” The writer/private investigator said, “anything you want to know, I’m willing to give.”
“Do you know a Fuchsia Gallop?”
Suddenly, Magnifying’s face turned pale. His voice dropped from its high pitched excitement and became low with nervousness and fright. His eyes shrank to the size of the average gnat, and his teeth chattered. His knees knocked and his mane seemed to stand on end. “F…f…f…Fuchsia…Gallop?”
“Yes, sir,” Twilight said politely, but with concern.
He suddenly rose from his chair and trotted to the window. He seemed to stare at a certain house just a few streets over. “Yes, I know her. I also know what she does when nopony else is looking.”
“And…what’s that?”
“She’s a thief and a hoarder, Princess Twilight,” Magnifying said, “I once saw her steal the last blanket off of a shivering pony. I’ve also seen her steal cookies from foals and food from older ponies. She’s also something of a con artist, Your Majesty. She’s run an illegitimate business here in the quarter for many years and taken advantage of many a pony. She’s a greedy, awful pony who uses her smile and pretty looks to bind ponies in the aesthetic without knowing what the substance truly is.”
“Why haven’t you reported these things?” Moon Dancer asked from her spot next to Twilight.
“I was going to, but then word got around to her that I was and she threatened to kill me. I just…I was scared for my life!”
He bent down and began weeping. Twilight got up and placed a compassionate hoof on his shoulder, assuring him that he was going to be alright. She needed him to keep a straight face and a straight mind if they were ever going to find Fuchsia and her accomplice. “Listen,” she said, “you never need to be afraid to tell somepony if something’s wrong. But tell me, were you looking at her home?”
He nodded, and Twilight smiled at him. “Thank you,” she said, “you just cracked this case for us. All of Equestria shall honor you for your honesty and integrity.” She hugged him and turned to the rest of the princesses and police ponies who were with her. “Alright, everypony! Let’s go lock up the bad ponies!”
The Robbery of the Canterlot Mint
Twilight, Moon Dancer, and a bevy of armed officers and soldiers descended upon the house that Magnifying Glass had shown them. They had managed to contact the other teams and everypony rendezvoused at the target location. The officers, stallion and mare alike, wore heavy battle armor and carried long swords. The unicorns in the battalion had been fitted with a special type of magic that would kill a pony with one strike. They were under strict orders only to use it if absolutely necessary. Other than that, everypony was the same.
Everypony, that is, except for Twilight and her friends. They wore no protective gear and strode into the eye of the storm with brave faces and strong words. Their weapon was their friendship, and they knew it. If they could connect on a different level from everypony else, then the culprits wouldn’t stand a chance. Twilight had ordered her group to remain calm and stay together, in order to ensure that their various Elements of Harmony matched up. They knew that they carried the essence of every element inside them, even though the actual implements had been destroyed by King Sombra a few months before.
“Alright, everypony!” Twilight addressed the crowd, “this is it! Remember, we need them alive! Do not use lethal force unless authorized to do so by either myself, Moon Dancer, or one of our captains.” With that, she turned and knocked. “Open up in the names of Their Royal Majesties, Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, Princess Cadance, and myself, Princess Twilight! Open up in the name of the law, or else we’re breaking down the door! We have warrants for all of you!”
For a moment, everything was still. A pin could have sounded as loud as a bomb had it dropped to the cobblestones below. Everypony stood their ground, waiting for something to happen. Then, suddenly, the door broke open and three ponies rushed the princess and Moon Dancer. They held them down as they fired lethal magic blasts into the crowd. Some of the officers didn’t have the chance to defend themselves, and they fell in the line of duty. Twilight flipped her captor around and attacked with her hooves. The two ponies scrambled around on the porch until the princess felt a strong magic grab her and toss her through a window. Moon Dancer was given the same treatment, and the door slammed shut once again.
“FOR CELESTIA’S SAKE, GET SOMETHING TO BREAK IT DOWN!” Decoder Dragnet, who had been part of Twilight’s team, screamed. He had a soft spot for the young princess, and considered her a close friend. Knowing she was trapped in there caused his heart to sink rapidly, and he began shouting orders in a frantic state.
Inside, Twilight and Moon Dancer were tied to chairs as the three criminals gloated over their capture. Like descending buzzards, they encircled the disabled mares. All that Twilight and Moon could do was growl and put up an antagonistic front. They couldn’t show weakness. If they did, then they would be killed for sure. They had to ensure that they kept up their character and tenacity in the face of this evil.
“Well, well, well,” Common Law said as he paced in front of the now shocked mares. They had no idea that Common was behind all this. “The royal book horse, and her little playmate, too! How quaint…”
“How dare you attempt to call yourself a defender of justice and an upholder of the law!” Twilight shouted, “you crooked crackpot!”
“Oh…such hurtful words, Your Majesty,” Common said sarcastically, “and here I thought you were the Princess of Friendship.”
“I am,” Twilight said, “but I’m also a leader of Equestria, and I will defend my home until my very last breath! I will see to it that justice and decency are carried out in all aspects of life, even when I ascend to take Celestia’s throne!”
Common Law chuckled as he wound himself around the captives. He knew them both quite well. Princess Twilight had been a thorn in his side for quite some time. He found her ideals of friendship and love weak, and he found the idea that strength can only be found in blind numbers to be quite the attractive one. He stepped forward and dared to put his hoof on her face. “I consider myself quite the just and caring pony,” he said, “more caring than even you, Princess. But there are some ponies out there who are…let’s say…annoyances, and those ponies must be dealt with accordingly. You four royal pains are at the top of that list!”
“How can you say that?!” Moon Dancer asked thunderously, “Princess Celestia is the one who gave you your license to practice law! She administered the bar exam! You’re the one betraying her!”
Common smiled as he maneuvered over to Moon Dancer. He bent down and placed a poisonous, mocking kiss on her cheek and began gently pressing his hoof through her mane. “If you know what’s good for you, you’ll stop touching me,” she said with hatred in her voice.
“Oh, Moon Dancer…my pretty, sweet Moon Dancer. The prodigal wife has finally returned to me! You know, sweetheart, I knew you’d come crawling back to me one day. Why? Because you can’t live without me, and you know it!”
“Bite me, you pathetic excuse for a stallion!” Moon said in a rage.
Through this exchange, Twilight found herself becoming more and more confused. Moon Dancer and Common Law seemed to know each other on a very deep level. Common had referred to her as “the prodigal wife,” and this caused the gears in Twilight’s brain to begin turning. It didn’t take long for her to put two and two together and figure out that Common and Moon were ex-mates.
Common bent down and kissed his former bride again, only this one seemed to mock her even more. The spot where his lips left her cheek seemed to burn with a fire born of mutual hatred. It was very obvious that whatever love he once held for her was gone, and it had been replaced by a despisal that scared Twilight to death. She knew that Common could snap at any moment and begin leaving slashes instead of kisses.
“My dear, darling Moon Dancer,” he mocked, “you must think that I am a very stupid pony. I mean, really. For you to come crawling back on your hooves and knees like this, only to be foiled and tied to a chair? Ha! This reminds me of our wedding night…”
“For the record, I didn’t enjoy it,” she spat.
“Oh, I know you didn’t. I also know you faked a lot of things, and not just when it came to our physical relationship. You faked an entire romance! You faked your love for me, you liar!”
“I didn’t!” She defended herself, “I did love you, and some twisted part of me still does! Where’s the Common Law I knew? The Common Law who had such a passion for seeing justice and mercy carried out? The Common Law who would defend foals from bullies? The pony I met at the Police Academy all those years ago? Where is he?”
Common snickered. “He’s gone, Moon Dancer, and the new and improved version has taken his place. I swear, I will rule Equestria, and there’s nothing you or anypony can do about it! These two mares here have given me more than you ever did, Moon Dancer, and that’s a damn fact! Now, then…why don’t we dispense with the conversation and get to the killing?”
The Robbery of the Canterlot Mint
Author's Note
Hey, everyone! Sorry that this is a little late, but I hope you've enjoyed "Cult of Luna" in the meantime. Now, it's time to put this story to rest and move on to the next one. I'm thinking that Dash needs a story from me. I've never done one that focused on her, so be on the lookout for that!
As always, happy reading and thanks so much for your support!
The Showdown
The villains advanced on the hapless captives, who began grabbing at their bindings. Twilight and Moon Dancer were looking for any way possible to escape. The ascending ruler attempted to use her magic to break the bonds, but every time she did so, she found that her magic fizzled out uselessly. “What the hell?” She asked in bewilderment.
Common Law laughed. “It seems you’ve discovered my newest creation. Yes, not only am I a dashingly handsome and daring lawyer, but I’m also an inventor on the side. There are three metal elements that are locked to the bottom of your chairs. These prevent any magic from being used, for as we all know, magic…is for the WEAK!”
He turned and gave vicious looks to his associates, and it became abundantly clear that he did not like them, nor did he consider their magical abilities something to be impressed by. He considered himself an Earth Pony Fundamentalist, and he was not about to have magic skew any of his plans for Equestrian domination. “You see,” he went on, “magic is not something to be awed by or drool over. It is something that benefits only those who can use it.”
“Oh, really?” Twilight asked mockingly, “then how come you’ve been the beneficiary of everything these two mares have done? As far as I can tell, you haven’t lifted a solitary hoof to help them!”
“I didn’t need to!” Common roared, “I figured that I would just…take advantage of their abilities the same way I take advantage of each of my clients: by promising them complete and absolute rubbish in exchange for getting what I want.”
Twilight saw the hurt visibly enter the faces of the two mares. Fuchsia and Pearl looked as if their entire lives had collapsed. Common Law seemed to have left the unicorns in disarray, locked within prisons of his own making. “But…Common,” Fuchsia said, “you said we were all gonna rule Equestria as a team. You promised us that we’d be just as powerful as you would be!”
Common Law eyed them with hatred and malice. He made it clear that his lies were only meant to advance his own position within Equestria. He cared nothing for the ponies that were left in his destructive wake, and that unfortunate body now included both Fuchsia and Pearl. They were going to be taken to court, tried, and punished for a crime they had committed on behalf of somepony who lied to them. They had realized their mistakes, but it had been too late.
“Oh, Fuchsia!” Pearl cried, “I just can’t go to prison! I just can’t!”
“You should’ve thought of that before you robbed the Canterlot Mint!” Moon Dancer thundered, “look, I feel for the two of you at having been exploited by this absolute disgrace of a pony here. But at the same time, the two of you could have enjoyed peace and happiness if you’d only given yourselves to friendship and harmony instead of this reckless lifestyle.”
“Moon’s right,” Twilight said, “when we feast from the Tree and Elements of Harmony, then everypony is better off. But when we feast from the seeds of hatred and lawlessness, then everypony gets hurt. Look at yourselves, Fuchsia and Pearl. Just look at the damage you’ve done, not only to Canterlot, but to your own lives. I’m sorry, but you have nopony to blame except you.”
Fuchsia and Pearl looked at each other, and Twilight saw tears of regret and remorse form in their eyes. They recognized that their entire operation had been a complete and total sham, and that Common was the only pony who would benefit from its success. They realized that the only hope they had now was to let the princess and the detective loose from their bonds. Perhaps then, they will show us some kind of mercy, Fuchsia reasoned.
“Let them loose!” She commanded to Pearl, and the two quickly undid the bonds that held Twilight and Moon down.
“What the hell are you doing, you idiots?!” Common Law asked in a rage, “those are our prisoners, and you’re setting them free?! Do you not care about ruling Equestria anymore?!”
“Frankly, no, we don’t!” Fuchsia roared, “you can take advantage of other stallions and mares, but not us! You’ve been scheming and conniving ever since day one! The only difference is, we thought we were a part of the plan. But it turns out, we were nothing more than fodder for you to feed the Equestrian court system!”
Common Law growled at them, but Fuchsia continued, unfettered. “I know what your dumb little plan was! You were gonna take all the money and run off as Pearl and I took the fall for these crimes! Then, you were gonna use that money and prosecute as many innocent ponies as you could until you cheated your way onto the very throne of Equestria! You would have even torn down the very rulers of our nation, if it meant getting your way!
With all four princesses imprisoned, Equestria would have looked to anypony to lead it. You would have come forward with all your pomp, circumstance, and the fact that you would have locked up the four biggest alleged criminals in Equestrian history, and demanded that you be given the throne. Thank goodness they found my wedding ring and submitted it as evidence! You were gonna drive Equestria into the dirt!”
Common didn’t say anything, but screamed and hurled himself at Fuchsia. When Moon Dancer and Twilight saw that he was actively attempting to physically take advantage of her, they jumped on him. He bit and slashed at the two, drawing blood with every hit. Moon Dancer felt his teeth meet with her flank, and he suddenly got on top of her. “Mm…” he said, in a voice that was somewhere between complete sleaze and a snarl, “I’ll bet you haven’t changed since our wedding night…”
“TWILIGHT, HELP!” Moon screamed.
Twilight shot Common Law with a magic blast that stunned him, and he fell over onto his side. “We’ll have no raping in Equestria!” The ascending princess roared as her eyes glowed with majesty, “that I can assure you! You will be tried, and you WILL be condemned for your actions! As a Princess of Equestria, I formally charge you with the masterminding of the robbery of the Canterlot Mint! I also charge you with numerous crimes and violations against the Attorney Code of Equestria! Furthermore, I charge you with attempted sexual assault against three mares this day! I shall personally see to it that you are either sent to prison forever, or destroyed for these evil deeds!”
She turned from him and eyed the two accomplices. They seemed to shrink before her, and they dropped to their knees and begged for mercy. She smiled at them and helped them up. “Please,” she said, “there’s no need to beg. I believe you two have had a magnificent breakthrough today, and I know that The Pony Penitentiary has a wonderful program that encourages friendship and harmony. Perhaps, while the two of you do your time there, you might learn these things and emerge as better ponies. I’m sorry I have to arrest you now, but know that I believe in you.”
With that, Moon Dancer slapped hoof cuffs on all three of them and led them outside. The ponies gathered there cheered when they saw the princess and the police officer emerge with the captured criminals. “Give ‘em hell, Twilight!” Rainbow Dash yelled.
“Indeed, darling!” Rarity agreed, “though…I wouldn’t have put it quite so crassly.”
“Listen up, everypony!” Twilight said, “these three shall be duly tried and sentenced for the crimes they have committed. But let this serve as an example! This is what happens when we allow the spirits of disharmony to reign supreme in our lives. Let us always look to friendship to solve our problems.”
The crowd cheered again as Moon Dancer led the criminals to a waiting police cart. They were quickly transported away, as Twilight turned and met her friends. They noticed that one of her ears was bleeding and she was covered with various scratches and bruises. “Twilight…are you going to be alright?” Fluttershy asked.
“Yes, Fluttershy,” Twilight said, “I’m gonna be fine. There’s nothing that can break me, as long as I have you all by my side.”
The six friends met in a joyful group hug, as Twilight declared that The Case of The Canterlot Mint was officially closed. Then, they all went back to Ponyville, happy in the knowledge that their friendship was as tight as ever, and they wouldn’t have to concern themselves with this crime anymore.
The Robbery of the Canterlot Mint
Twilight and Moon Dancer's Breakthrough
After dismissing the court, the three princesses went their separate ways. Luna had to raise the moon and perform her nightly duties, Cadance had to catch The Crystal Express back to her home, and Twilight had a pony she needed to see. So she trotted back to the Mint and went directly into the vault, where she knew Moon Dancer would be. All of her regular friends had headed back to their palace rooms, but she wanted some one-on-one time with her detective friend. While she was overjoyed that Celestia had been acquitted and restored to her rightful place on the throne, she was also very nervous. The true perpetrator was still on the loose, and she had no idea how they were going to solve the crime.
“Hello, Moon Dancer,” she said as she walked up next to her friend, “how’s it going?”
Moon turned and gave Twilight a lost look. “I don’t know what the hell to do next,” she said bluntly, “I mean…now we’re right back to square one. As much as I enjoy exonerating the leader of Equestria, I also enjoy solving crimes and locking the bad ponies up. I don’t feel that I’m any closer to accomplishing that goal.”
Twilight could sympathize greatly. As one of the rulers of Equestria, she always loved it whenever justice was served and friendship and trust could be counted on once again. She knew that Equestria was not a perfect place, and making sure everypony was safe and happy was a top priority of hers. Ensuring that the guilty parties were put in their place and innocent ponies were set free was crucial to her role as a princess.
“Have you checked for anything else?” She asked.
“We’ve swept this entire vault, Twilight,” Moon said, “and found nothing except that wedding band. That helped get Celestia out of her predicament, but threw me into a whole new one. I just…don’t know…what to do next.”
Twilight didn’t respond, but began her own visual and magical search. She looked in every nook and cranny, every possible place that somepony might have left a clue behind, but she came up empty hooved. She even used her magic to levitate the remaining bits so Moon Dancer could search underneath them. But when Moon shook her head, Twilight realized the absolute futility of their situation. So she gently set the bits back down in the exact order they had been placed in.
“What do we do?” She asked simply.
“I don’t know,” Moon said, “but if you have any other ideas, I’m open to them.”
Twilight began pacing around the vault, trying desperately to think of something that would give them access to the villain’s mind. In order to solve this mystery, we must think like the culprit, she thought, and that won’t be easy. We know that the guilty party is somepony very inexperienced when it comes to magic, because of the lack of care put into the incognito spell. We also know that they disguised themselves as Celestia in order to gain access to the vault. But they couldn’t have just come out with a giant bag of money…
She suddenly gasped. “Moon Dancer!” She cried, “there’s more than one pony involved!”
Moon suddenly became very interested. “How do you figure?” She asked.
“Because whoever committed the crime had to play up the Celestia disguise, and Banker Bit wouldn’t have let Celestia trot out of here with 500 million bits! There had to have been somepony on the outside, working to funnel the money out of the vault.”
“But there aren’t any signs of a break in,” Moon pointed out.
“Yes,” Twilight said, “but we live in a magical world. If one has enough magical ability, then things can be floated in and out of place without so much as batting an eye.”
Moon rolled her eyes. “I’m a unicorn, Twilight. Of course I know that, and I looked and looked for something to tip me off to that, but I didn’t find anything.”
“Perhaps you didn’t look hard enough…”
Twilight trotted over to the stone walls of the vault and began to look for the slightest dishevelment. She even used one of her latest spells to look for magical residue left behind. She scanned through the rocks and every one of them looked clean. All, that is, except one. A very pink sparkle showed on the stone’s smooth surface, marking the place where magic had been used. “Moon Dancer!” She said, “come and see this!”
Moon trotted over and looked. She became intensely interested in the pink substance, and knew immediately that it was magic that only a unicorn could leave behind. Even though it was invisible to the naked eye, it existed in a world of its own and could only be unearthed via the right type of magic light. “Twilight, this is huge!” She said, “now we know that there was a break in here!”
“A partial break in, Moon,” Twilight said, “as I stated earlier, one perp posed as Celestia to gain access to the vault while another waited outside. At a certain signal or sign, the second culprit used their magic to move this stone so that all the money could be taken out without Banker Bit or any of the guards having a second thought about it. Unfortunately for our criminals, their inexperience with magic is what’s leading to their downfall. They couldn’t have known of the residue that a spell automatically leaves behind.”
“That’s a nice theory, Twilight,” Moon said, “but what are we gonna do? Search for every pink, married unicorn in Equestria and ask them about their experience levels with magic? No…there has to be something else! A hoof print or a smudge or…”
She suddenly stopped talking as she looked in the dust just ahead of her. It had been messed up four distinct times. Her mouth fell open as the hoof prints registered in her mind. She was immediately taken back to a horrific magic shootout she had partaken in only weeks prior. She had nearly been killed when a lethal blast struck her chest. Thankfully, they were able to transport her to a nearby hospital and she had escaped death’s teeth by an inch or so.
“Is something wrong, Moon?” Twilight asked, noticing the frightened look on her friend’s face.
“Yes, Twilight,” Moon said. “Do you see the hoof prints?”
She pointed and Twilight followed her foreleg. Her eyes bugged out when she saw them. “How did we miss these?” She asked. “They were right in front of us!”
“That’s not the point, Twilight. I’d know these prints anywhere. They belong to somepony who nearly killed me in another robbery attempt last month. I remember seeing them right before the shooting began.”
Twilight became excited. The prospect of finding and jailing the evildoers responsible for this mess set her heart aflame. “So…who was it?”
Moon sighed. “I believe she said her name was Fuchsia Gallop, and she swore eternal vengeance on me. I wounded her shoulder, but she still managed to get away. We’ve put up wanted posters around town, but nopony’s come forward with information. But this time, I think we’ve got her!”
