The Princess's Title

Goose Chase

When I was a young colt, I decided that I wanted to serve under the princess as one of her protectors. Guardians of the world, those who guarded the princess that ruled it. Or, at least that’s what my friends and I thought at the time. We played games, we had fillies be stand-ins for her, some of us even growing to love each other. There were enough colts and fillies for everypony to match together in that little group, but I was never interested in any of them. One day, she would be my princess. And on that day, there would be nopony else. Just her.

Shortly after going into elementary, fate saw it fit to throw a wrench in my plans. Destiny depicted itself on my flanks in the form of a silver tongue. What else could I, the self-proclaimed hero of justice and protector of the princess, be, other than a fantastic liar? Tell anypony anything, and they’ll believe it. Not because what I say is believable, or what I tell them is true, simply because I was the one that said it.

Imagine my shock my sheer disbelief when I learned that the princess I so desperately wished to serve, was once the Element of Honesty. Somepony like me was unfit. There should’ve been no hope, no recourse. What little six years of life I had by then was all but meaningless now. But then, my parents surprised me one day. What I thought was just a simple trip to the market in our little corner of the big city that was Canterlot, turned out to be a life changing moment.

For what present could be greater than letting the colt that wanted nothing more than to be by her side, to meet the subject of his desires?

When I first laid eyes on her, I knew she was more than I’d ever dreamed. Princess Applejack, The Major Diarch of the Equestrian Empire. Her golden mane was almost like sunlight drifting in the wind, her coat a glistening vermillion that sparkled as she moved, her eyes like bright emeralds atop a crown. Truly, she was a work of art.

Even as a child, I understood that she was something special. But more than that, there was a quality to her that, all these years later, I still can’t quite place. Her every action seemed to bring balance. It was almost as if… she were virtue itself.

When it was finally my turn to greet her after we waited for hours in that line, I was almost too nervous to approach. What if she knows? What if she finds out? I can’t let her see my cutiemark, I can’t. In the end, it wasn’t me or my parents that coaxed me onwards, but her. That gentle smile, those warm eyes. Even now, the memory of that day is as clear and crystalline as it was then.

‘Come, my little pony. Ya came all this way ta see me after all. Ah want ta meet ya. What’s yer name, son?’

Tail tucked between my legs, just shy of shaking in fear, slowly, I managed my approach. ‘I-I’m Goose Chase, Princess.’ Even as afraid as I was, I never forgot the royal guard’s salute I’d practiced with my friends so many times, and performed it as best I could.

She made such a warm, bubbly sound. Laughter that could make a pony feel like they’re floating. ‘A little knight, are ya?’ Maybe she could see through me, maybe she’d taken a liking to me, but against everything that the signs and the event coordinators had said, she broke the rules and used her magic to set me in her lap. I was touching her. She brought me up. My young mind was pushed so far into overdrive that I nearly fainted from the idea that my idol was interested in me. Such a lovely scent, the fragrance of apples.

‘My dearest little pony, why do ya want ta be my knight?’

Why indeed. What was it that drove me to my current position? Was it that moment? Or was it even before? Did my cutiemark lead me to her, or did she find me because of my cutiemark? Regardless of how I ended up here, I believe it was what I said next that set me on this course.

‘Because I love you.’

The crowd laughed. My parents laughed. The event staff laughed, even the Minor Diarch, who was sitting right next to her laughed. Why were they laughing? Was something I said funny? That little colt didn’t understand it. The centuries old Princess, however, did. What happened next, I’m still not sure I understand. In a flash of green, the world froze around me. There was no laughter, no wind, no sound. She and I were alone.

‘Little Goose, do ya know what it means, ta love somepony? Especially, somepony like me?’ she asked.

The young mind didn’t understand. But because of that lack of understanding, there was a purity in it. An untainted innocence that spoke something true. ‘Why would loving you be different than anypony else?’

The princess laughed. She laughed so hard that it brought tears to her eyes. In a move I wouldn’t understand until many years later, she wrapped me in her forelegs and kissed my head. ‘Now that is an answer. If the day comes when you’re older, after you’ve grown and had the chance ta see what life is like, and ya still feel this way, then apply fer the royal guard.

‘If ya work hard, and ya pass the exam, then ya can be my knight. This world is harder and colder than ya know. Even here in Equestria, things are the best they could be fer a little pony like yerself, and they will never be perfect. Ta be my knight, you’ll have ta become somepony that can live in that cruel world beyond this place. Last time… Ah lost ya, and Ah couldn’t…’ I couldn’t fathom why, but the princess had started to cry. She looked at me with some… strange familiarity that I couldn’t place. I didn’t know what I did, but I was raised a good colt.

I wiped her tears away and said, ‘Please don’t cry princess. It’ll be okay.’

Of course, that didn’t do anything but make her cry harder, and I was still very confused. She held me close and stroked my mane and said, ‘Things will be different this time. Ah have real power now. Never again will Ah let anypony take my family away. Not now, not ever.’ She released me and took a deep breath. ‘Lamni… no, Goose… In just a second here, everythin’ is gonna go back ta normal. And when it does, Ah want ya ta pretend that none of this ever happened. Ah know ya hate yer talent, but do ya think ya could use it fer me and play along?’

She’d already known what I was. Who I was. My personality down to the very core. She knew me better than I did. But, she was my princess. What was happening then, that very meeting, was very special for both of us. Without hesitation, I agreed.

‘Good. Now then… Ah’m gonna tell ya one last secret. Once upon a time, Ah was the Element of Honesty. But now, Ah’m the Princess of-”

“Goose? Wake up.”

Damn. Right before the end too. What did she say? That’s the only thing I can never remember. Dazed, I sat up from bed and had to take account of a few things. First, I had to remember my age. Not five, but twenty-six. Second, my position. Not an elementary student, but the Major Diarch’s Consort. Third, the itinerary for today. Malus and Princess Flurry should be here at noon to discuss the attack. I have to meet with Aroma at fourteen hundred, I need to have the soldiers in prepped for ship out by eighteen hundred, and she wanted me to… she wanted me to…

“Goose.” I turned my head toward the source of the voice, and before I knew it, I was caught in a kiss. Other matters were dropped. All thought processes stopped. It was just like the green world in the dream, or memory, I suppose. Frozen in time, just holding still with her. “Good mornin’, Sugarcube.”

She pulled away, and I was left falling back to bed trying to catch my breath. I’ve always been very perceptive, usually aware of my surroundings thanks to all my training over the years, but no matter what I do, she finds a way to get the jump on me. It’s a little irritating, but I suppose I can’t complain.

“Morning,” I said after finding room to breathe. I looked around until I found the big touch display on the wall. Seven hundred? The sun isn’t even up yet. “Any reason you’re up so early, Princess?”

“Maybe. Maybe not. Some days, Ah wonder if there was ever any reason fer any of this, and some days Ah wonder why there is reason fer anythin’ and everythin’. Ah made pancakes.” Bags under her eyes, wet mane just shy of trailing on the floor, bathrobe, bloodshot eyes.

“No sleep?” I asked making my way to the table in our chambers. The smell in my dream may not have actually been part of the memory because it was still in the air once I finally took notice of it. Apples and cinnamon, something sugary sweet. When I finally sat down, she met me with a large plate of a big stack covered in syrup, whipped cream, and powdered sugar.

“Well. Not really. Fer a number of reasons, my emotions are runnin’ wild and cookin’ seems ta be the only thing that helps me settle down. With all the ones in the freezer Ah started on before midnight, there’s probably enough of these ta feed the castle.” She brought me a cup of hot coffee, and now that I could see her little workstation, her green aura was still working the stove and the counter to produce more of her Apple Family pancakes. It’s not unusual to find her cooking for somepony, but it is unusual for her to do so in such volume. Whatever is on her mind, it’s more than just the attack.

“Thanks,” I offered while taking a sip.

She kissed my head and gave me a quick hug. “Course, Sugarcube.” She went back to the little apartment kitchen in the royal bedroom to continue whatever this pancake craze was, and I took the time to study her. I can’t always do it, but usually, I can read a pony. The little ticks in their movements, the little shakes and stalls in their voice. She’s… unnerved about something. One would naturally assume the attack on Celestia’s Island yesterday would be it, but this is… more than that. Emotions running wild? There was a tension in her movements. A stiffness. Usually when she cooks, she’s relaxed and loose. She moves with little care to her efficiency, in tune with how she feels. There’s often a bounce in her step. This however seems almost… angry?

“Still thinking about the attack?” I asked.

Her ear twitched, she spared me a quick glance, then returned to her work. “Yes and no. Ah’m thinkin’ about a lot right now, really. There’s been recent… revelations, Ah suppose. Feelin’ some things Ah never thought Ah’d feel again. Things that, quite frankly, Ah’m far too old ta be feelin’.”

Hmm. She doesn’t want to look at me and talk about it at the same time. Too old? Nothing about my bruised hips suggests she’s ‘old’ in any normal sense. If anything, she’s likely more fit than most of our top soldiers, including me. It couldn’t be about her body, so that leaves her mind. I can’t say anypony but one of the old princesses would know what a three hundred ninety year old mare feels like, but for one of them, that would be a magnitude of ages to remember back to. Too old to feel… maybe something infantile?

“Apprehensive about something?”

She sighed and stopped the production line. “Without a doubt, Goose, without a doubt.” She turned all the equipment off, wrapped her leftover batter in plastic and stored that in the fridge, then joined me at the table with a large stack of her own pancakes. Though, her stack beat mine by at least a few hands. That’s a lot of food, even for her.

“Well, why is that?”

She looked me over. This time, more intently. She found my eyes and held me in a stare for so long that I almost thought I’d done something wrong. But, just before I could say anything else, she broke away and shook her head. “Ah’ll tell ya later. Ah’m not ready ta discuss that just yet. Why don’t we play a little game instead?”

I swallowed the last half of my first cake and brought a hoof to my chin. “A game? You haven’t played a game with me since I was a child.”

She frowned after scarfing down good third of her stack. Abnormally hungry today I see. “Really? How long ago was that?”

“Maybe… eight, ten years? When you met me after you found out I joined the junior enlistment program. Back in high school if I remember correctly.”

She clicked her tongue and rolled her eyes. “Tch, ten years. That’s nothin’. That’s uh… when Ah taught ya how ta play chess, wasn’t it?”

I nodded. “It was. You beat me so badly that I devoted the next year to learning the game just so I could play you again. Imagine my shock when the Major Princess not only came to see me personally, but just to play a game with me that I’d never even heard of.”

She chuckled. “Y’all will never be as shocked about anythin’ as Ah was when Ah first met you. This is a different kinda game. One you’re good at.”

I raised a brow. “One I am good at? Don’t tell me you’ve suddenly taken an interest in video games.”

She shook her head. “No, no, nothin’ like that. Ah did try it out not too long ago, but Ah nearly broke a wall because the headset couldn’t numb my nerves. Very pretty, but there are physical limitations Ah have that other ponies don’t. No, what Ah want ta play is a bit of a word game.”

She wants to play a game she hates? “You? A word game?”

She waved a hoof at me and inhaled another couple pancakes. “Ah know how it sounds, but humor me here. It’s… a little like a test. Fer y’all and fer me.”

I crossed my hind legs and forelegs. “Well, at first you had my attention, but now you have my interest. What are the rules?”

A sly smile crept up her lips. “Eager and willin’ ta please, just like always, aren’t ya?”

I gave a slight bow. “But of course, my princess. Your any desire is my command.”

“Big mouth ya got there. Let’s see if ya can put yer money there too. The game is simple. We take turns askin’ and answerin’ questions. Yer goal is ta get me ta admit somethin’ without askin’ me directly about a subject, only usin’ yer words. The game is won once somepony says somethin’ they weren’t supposed ta. However, ya also have ta know when somethin’ was said that wasn’t supposed ta be. Sound doable?”

I frowned. “This… doesn’t seem like an all too innocent game. Or an easy one. How does a common pony such as myself manage to get the poker face princess to say something she doesn’t want me to know?”

“It ain’t, but the real-world applications of it are important. In this particular kind of game, y’all have an edge on everypony anyways, mister silver tongue. The princess might just so happen ta like ya a bit more than anypony else, so she might say things ta y’all that she wouldn’t say ta anypony else.”

“Hmm… Well, in that case, what kind of national dark secret should I try to pry from you? What happened to Princess Cadance and Twilight maybe?”

She flinched “Ugh. Flurry or Malus would probably tell ya if ya asked them in bad or good mood respectively. You’re part of the family, so ya have clearance ta know if ya really wanted ta.”

“Oh, clearly that’s out of the running then. That’d be easy to get if all it takes is asking Princess Flurry in a bad mood. Let’s see… how about the badlands conflict of 2093?”

She rolled her eyes. “You’ve worked fer me long enough ta have an idea of what Ah did back then.”

I shrugged. “Oh, I don’t know Princess, you weren’t an alicorn before then and well up in your years. Records say you became an alicorn the following week, but there were odd circumstances about it. The other elements of harmony from the chaotic era had been long dead by then, and even the lord of chaos himself left the world and his children behind. Why you and not one of them, too?

“And besides our usual method, there’s still the question of what happened to the ponies of Ironside, the focal point of that conflict. They disappeared around the same time, but not immediately after the badlands conflict was resolved. We could go back about eighty years from then and ask what happened to the ponies in Hollow Shades too.”

A vein bubbled to the surface of her forehead. “Pushin’ the wrong buttons, Goose.”

I couldn’t help but smile. “Alright, alright. A secret, but not a particularly dark one like the vanishing towns.” I tapped my chin until the memory of the dream returned to me. The princess of… the princess of what? Something the public doesn’t know and even closely guarded by the internal family…

She raised her snout. “Figure somethin’ out?”

“Guilty as charged. I’m ready to start the game then.”

She smiled. “Good. Ah’ll go first; Goose, when ya dream, what do ya usually dream about?”

“I suppose if this morning is any example, the past would be it.”

She nodded. “That past, huh? Alright, that’s one from me. Go ahead.”

“Princess Applejack, there is a sense I get from you when I see you move. Something about it, something about you makes me feel… well, let’s call it, ‘inspired.’ Why is that?”

She frowned, looked down, then looked up. “Well, Sugarcube, when colts reach a certain age, they start seein’ mares in a new light.”

I sighed. “I can’t believe you said that with a straight face.”

She shrugged and smirked. “Ah can’t believe y’all of all ponies asked that without thinkin’ about it. Ya know, if it lasts more than four hours-”

“Right. Let me rephrase that. This inspiration isn’t something so simple as physical attraction. Not even infatuation. Something more, something regal. Looking at you, aside from all the things that does to a stallion, makes me think there’s something more to you than just being a pony. Looking at you makes me think of virtue, but I don’t get that sense when Celestia and Luna visit, nor around Flurry. Why is it just you?”

She lazily held a hoof out. “Let’s be honest here, ya know Flurry personally, it’d be kinda hard ta think of anythin’ pure around that girl.”

“So many ways for that to be put into context.”

“And Ah mean all of ‘em, and ya know it. Virtue huh? Knowin’ what we do, Ah’m surprised ya think that way.”

I shrugged. “Dirty as the work may be, somepony has to do it. That said, this has been going on since the very first day I met you in person. I haven’t seen many pictures of you as a young mare, but I don’t get the same feeling when I look at element of harmony Applejack as compared to Princess Applejack. Any idea why that is?”

She leaned back in her chair and stared me down. A brow raised, she asked, “Lookin’ at pictures of me from the long dead past, are ya?”

“What can I say? You’re a particularly interesting figure. After being passed the throne by the Princess of Friendship, even as farcical as her title may have been, there is an… oddity about why that happened. Or really, there’s little information as to why. There’s no logical reason for the Princess of Friendship to retire after a mere seventy years of rule. All I can ever find is that she just… stepped down. And once you took over, Equestria took a much more militaristic approach to foreign relations. Some ponies were calling you a visionary, others were calling you a war monger.

“Yet, even though there were many battles fought over your first few decades in power, Equestria has retained peaceful relationships from then on. Well, save yesterday. Princess Celestia once told me something about keeping information not meant to be seen hidden away until it fades to black over time. If nopony remembers, then it’s almost like it never happened.”

She pursed her lips and tapped them with a hoof for a moment. “Twilight and Ah had… some differences of opinion, is all. Ah just happened ta prove her wrong. She wasn’t willin’ ta become what she needed ta be ta lead, so she decided against keepin’ on. Responsibility was never her forte anyways. But… you forgot somethin’, didn’t ya?”

Damn, she’s catching on. “Well, that’s possible. I’ve probably forgotten a lot of things in my life.”

She laughed. “What a non-answer. Ah’ll leave it be fer the moment then. Goose, when ya think about the future, what do ya see fer yourself? Ta be more specific, what do ya think life looks like fer ya goin’ forward? A little more, were it not me, and a normal mare ya were with, what would life look like fer ya, right now?”

Were it not her? I had to think on that. Two issues present itself right now: one, I don’t know what she’s trying to get me to admit to. Or, at least what she wants to know. Two, what… would life look like without her? What will life look like in a few years? She’s been what feels like my raison d’etre for all my life. Could I imagine a world without her? … Well, there was Aurora.

Had I never met her… I suppose I’d be with Aurora right now, wouldn’t I? Maybe a job as a speaker, or a career politician. A foal or two. Aurora always wanted to be a mother. I… wonder if she ever got her wish? Could there be any drastic changes in my life in a few years? I’d still be here, with her, protecting the world from itself like I have been for the past six years. Did I… ever have any other goals, than being here, with her?

“Well, honestly, princess, It’s hard for me to think I could ever be anywhere else but with you. However… if I’d never met you, all the way back in the beginning, I suppose I might be some kind of career politician. I’d imagine I might’ve married an old friend of mine from school and maybe had a child or two by this point. As for the future though… There was a quote I once heard.

“It goes, ‘Moving to the future is a lot like sailing a rowboat. We’re seated backwards trying to go forwards, so we can see the past clearly as we pass it, but we can only hope to reach the future we’ve set course for.’ I don’t know what lies ahead, but my hope is that I’m still here with you when I can look back.”

Again she laughed, but this time, it was almost like that memory from twenty years ago was playing itself out again. She took me in her hooves after grabbing me with her magic and held me close. “And that is the right answer, my dear Goose. Unfortunately fer ya, you’ve lost the game.”

I clicked my tongue. “What? Oh, come on, I haven’t even gotten my last turn yet!”

She shrugged. “Ah got what Ah wanted outta ya. By the rules ya agreed ta earlier, that wins me the game.”

“Now hold on. I thought you wanted an admission of something. What did you want me to say?”

A dark smile on her face, she pressed her forehead to mine and stared past my eyes and even deeper inside. In the strangest way, I felt even more naked than usual, almost like somepony had shaved my coat off. “Now, if Ah told ya what Ah wanted, that would defeat the purpose of winnin’ the game, wouldn’t it? It’s scarier fer yer opponent ta know that ya know what ya wanted ta, but not tell them about it.

“They spin their wheels tryin’ ta figure out what it was ya found out and end up sayin’ even more little pieces of information that ya weren’t supposed ta know. Ya said it yerself, Sugarcube. This little game we played ain’t so innocent. It does, however, have the power ta get the truth. So even if we have ta trudge through the mud ta see it, the truth is ultimately what we want ta know.” She kissed me, then set me off to the side to finish her breakfast.

Again, she’s eating much more and faster than I remember her ever doing, but I couldn’t figure out why. Or, even what I’d said that she wanted to know. I couldn’t decide if it was more frustrating because I effectively serve as an intelligence officer for my princess, or the fact that I was completely clueless. But, then again, I suppose that’s how she’s supposed to win the game. With me, or whoever her opponent is, in the dark. Wouldn’t surprise me if she practices this sort of thing every time we leave the country. Goddess knows she probably learned it from the Sun Princess. Princess Celestia spent a lot of time around her before and after she took the throne, after all…

“Well, that’s all well and good, I suppose, but can I just ask you what I wanted anyways?”

She took a napkin in her magic and wiped her mouth while sizing me up again. “Ah don’t see why not. But Ah won’t promise ya an answer, provided It’s what Ah think it is.”

“Alright then… For context, I was dreaming about our first meeting all those years ago. It happens fairly often, but I can never remember the last thing you said to me. We’ve had the Princess of the Sun, the Princess of the Moon, the Princess of Love, the Princess of Friendship, but… yours, and by extension, Princess Flurry’s titles are kept from the general public. You told me yours once, but I’ve since forgotten. What are your titles?”

She raised a brow and frowned. “Mmhmm. That’s what Ah thought. Ah’ll tell ya after we go deal with that jackass that attacked my Island. Ah’ll tell him too, fer that matter.”

I frowned. “You’re going to take care of him personally?”

She looked down at her hoof and flexed her foreleg. “Goose, Ah don’t like ta do what needs ta be done. Nopony does. But what Garma has done is an atrocity against even his own kind. For that, he needs ta be rewarded with what he deserves. Ta live up ta my title, ta keep Equestria safe, ta send a message ta all the other thugs out there with the power ta send armies after my little ponies, Ah will do what must be done.

“Fer three hundred years Ah’ve followed my ideals ta where Ah am, and Ah don’t think Ah’ll be stoppin’ anytime soon. So long as Ah remain in power, Ah will continue down this path, knowin’ that one day, Ah too, will be judged fer my sins. Anyways, finish yer breakfast. We have work ta do before the big day Friday.” Her horn lit itself with a green blaze, and then a holo watch floated to her. “Besides, it’s already almost eight thirty. Ah’m sure Aroma’s got her panties in a wad waitin’ on me. Ah’m surprised she hasn’t-”

Ring, ring, ring. In coming call from: Apple, Aroma.

My Princess laughed. “Speak of the devil and she shall appear.”