The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 2 - Complexs of Disharmony

I was finishing with a capital repairing with all the Zap Apple processing system at Sweet Apple Acres. When I did, I jumped down from the container, and gave it two knocks. "That's it. Everything is fixed now. I don't know how it could be still working this long, with that huge stuck in the pipes. Now it should work at least three times faster."

Applejack looked at me with astonishment: "Three times?! What in tarnation?! Tha means three times the profits! Thank ya, sugarcube, thank ya!" Then, she sadly lowered he head and the ears: "Ah can't believe how much we've lost all this years. If only Ah had figured it out earlier. Now Ah'm honestly thinkin' that Twilight was right callin' me stupid." She scolded herself.

I chuckled: "No shit, AJ. Listen, girl, you shouldn't lash yourself just because you didn't get all the picture about a particular event. That happens more often that you could imagine. However, if that makes you to feel better, I can give you some hints to help you to detect flaws on any matter of your interest."

"And do ya think tha Ah can learn? Ah don't know much else than just buckin' apple trees, doin' lasso catches and basic maths." She doubted.

"And that's your first mistake. Never think that you can't learn more. That'll only block your actual ability to do so. And the only way that you can learn, is accepting that you'll need several attempts to solve a determined problem, and not giving up if you can't at the first time."

Applejack listened to me with her muzzle opened: "Ah didn't think tha ya were so wise. Honestly, Ah tought tha ya only knew to fight and doin' stupid things, like yar Rarity's weekly chases. Why do ya do tha, by the way?"

I raised the head and looked up: "Honestly? I have no idea."

We both laughed.

"Alright, sugarcube. Ah think ya deserve some payment for yar work." Assured Applejack.

I waved my arm with a disdainful gesture: "No need to, AJ. I didn't do this for the money."

"Hey, but it's not money! It's a Zap Apple pie, from the first batch of this season! Don't ya dare to reject it, or Granny Smith will get mad with ya!" Said Applejack, giving me the pie.

"Thank you, AJ."

"Yar welcome, homie! And Ah have to tell ya, Ah am really eager to receive all tha wisdom ya have!" She joyfully winked to me, blushing a bit. Suddenly, a strong trotting noise was heard. Applejack turned her head, then turned it back to me and told me: "Well, sorry hun, but it looks there's another stampede. See ya later, sugarcube!" And she turned around and galloped away, swinging a rope: "Yeeehay!"

I stood there, dumbfounded about if she was telling me something between lines. I looked to her, then to the pie, then to her again, then to the pie, then to... she already was nowhere to be seen.

So, I turned around and walked away, mindlessly chewing the zap apple pie. Which was delicious, by the way...

Rarity was making a fine-draw motif, with a very delicate material: "Steady, darling, steady. This material of haute couture is very expensive and hard to find. So I have only one shot..." She said to herself.

At that very moment, Spike slammed the door, startling her and making her to ruin the motif:

"Spike! For the mane of...!" Rarity inhaled like she's going to yell, and then she said with soothing voice: "What's happening, darling?"

"Rarity, Rarity! Where's Twilight, where's Twilight?! I have to deliver this message to her! It's urgent!" He ran to her with desperation.

Rarity froze in place and shivered, because this scene looked frightfully familiar to her, like a Deja Vu.

"Let me see..." She said, scared, grabbing the scroll with her magic, and starting to read: Oh no, a message from Celestia. What could have done that little bookworm now...? Wait. Luna has escaped?! And Celestia is making a search'n capture team?!! And Gus is going?!!!

The scroll slowly fell to the floor, while Rarity, trembling of fear, was imagining the worst of scenarios: "Oh no. They have to fight that fearsome evildoer again! And the poor monkey has been so down lately, with his break up with Twilight! What about if that affects his combat skills?! What about if he doesn't make it, because he thinks that nopony loves him?!!" Then, she put a hoof in her forehead and exclaimed, concerned: "NO!. Of all the worst things that could happen... this is... the... worst... possible... THING!" Then, she galloped out her Carousel Boutique, looking for her beloved chaser. "I have to tell him that I love him! That'll cheer him up, and it'll surely give him strenghts in the battle! I don't care anymore if Twilight thinks later that I'm a coltfriend stealer! I have to tell him what I feel for him!"

Spike just stood there, dumbfounded. Then, he picked up the scroll again and ran after her, exclaiming: "Rarity! You forgot thiiiis! Raaaaaarityyyyyy!!"

Fluttershy was looking herself in the quiet waters of the small brook in front of her house: This was the day. She had been preparing herself for the past three months, just for this moment. Like her advicer told her, she inspired and exhaled two or three times, filling herself with courage to do what she wished to do, with all the strenghts of her heart.

Then, she walked, alone for the very first time in the last six months, in direction to an open field she knew. There, she saw him: Her Teddy Bear. He was sitting in a rock, looking mindlessly somewhere, not even noticing her. A shiver passed all through her body, from hooves to head, her heart beat frantically, the desire of running away was almost unbearable... But she stood there, and she gave a step, then another, then another one. Her Teddy Bear was closer everytime. She closed her eyes, put her mind blank, inspired and exhaled, and just walked, without thinking on anything at all. Suddenly, she heard a noise, and she opened her eyes: Her Teddy Bear had stood up, and he was shooking the dust from his raincoat.

She wanted to turn around and run far, far away, but, after a titanical willpower effort, she managed to constrain that primal instinct, then, she inspired and exhaled again, and, like she has practiced several times in the brook, she spoke: "You know, Teddy Bear? That raincoat doesn't scare me anymore..."

I turned to her, surprised: "Whoa, Flutters! You surprised me, I didn't felt you coming. That sneaking practice are paying off, girl!" I smiled, scratching the back of my head and giving her a thumb up with the other hand.

"Really? I... I'm that good?" She smiled too, closing her eyes and swinging her tail, satisfied.

"Yeah! And, you're not scared of my clothes anymore! That's all an achievement, I can tell you!"

She blushed and laughed with that lovely and feminine way she does, and turned her head, covering her face with her mane: "Don't keep saying that, or I'm going to believe it."

"But it's the truth! Even if it doesn't looks like the big deal, it is!"

She looked at me perplexed: "But how...? How that can be so important? It's just a silliness, like everything I do..."

I looked at her, smiling, and put a open hand in my chest: "Because you're very important to me."

She facehoofeed, half opening her muzzle, her eyes quivered, and tears of happiness slid from them. Then, she smiled too, and with sobbing voice, she told me:

"Teddy Bear... there is something... that I... I want to tell you..."

"Yes, cutie?"

She shivered and gulped: "I... I... want to ask you... if... if... you want to be... my... my..."

In that very moment, Rainbow Dash appeared from nowhere in the sky: "Master! Master! I've just received an emergency call from Canterlot! Luna has escaped! Celestia has summonned an urgent meeting!"

"What?!" I scowled and put my fists in my waist. "I knew it! I told Celestia that bitch can't be trusted!"

Fluttershy blushed and lowered head and ears when she heard that strong word.

"Oh, sorry, Flutters. It's that damned mare that put me on the nerves." I quickly apologized to her. "We'll continue our conversation later. Can you get back home from here, cutie?"

She nodded, relieving me. Then, I cast my flying cloud and flown to Rainbow Dash: "Lead the way!"

Fluttershy just stood there, looking at me while I was dissapearing in the distance: "... coltfriend?" She concluded.

During the flight, Rainbow Dash, after briefing me about the mission, commented to me: "OHMYGOSHOHMYGOSHOHMYGOSH! I'm so excited! This is our first real mission together, master! We should celebrate it after we get the job done!"

I chuckled. "We haven't finished the mission, and you're thinking in celebrating already?"

"Of course, master. If there's something I've learned during our time hanging up around, is that there is nothing you can't do. I mean that you're like... a super cool mean dude, who's not mean enough to be cool and cool enough to not to be so mean... I mean... You know what I mean, don't you?"

I was a bit confused with the meaning of so many 'means', but I nodded anyway.

"And I want you to know, that if we end up in my house in the night, we can do... something else besides watching the stars..." She blushed and smiled.

"Really?" I chuckled again. "No ear ripping this time?"

"Nope. No ear ripping. But it may include piercing. Disarming and exhausting piercings, like your dispel sword does, if you know what I mean." She assured, smiling and lewdly closing her eyes.

I smiled and winked. "Yep. This time I DO KNOW what you mean."

After the flight, we arrived where Celestia was expecting us, among some ponies more: Shining Armor, that so-called Storm Chaser the pegasi and... Twilight.

As soon as we saw each other, at the same time, we exclaimed and raised arm and foreleg, respectively: "Please don't...!!" Then, with a lower tone, we concluded: "... leave." at the same time too. We just stared to each other, like two fools. For me, everything seemed to dissapear but her. For her, everything seemed to dissapear but me...

"Hey, you two! We haven't time for that right now! Now pay attention to me, at once!" Celestia snapped us out from our daydream. "This is the state of things: My scouts have spotted Luna in the mountains at north, near our frontier with the Gryphoon Empire. I don't know if she'll try to contact them for help, so you'll need to be very careful and stand on your guard. Under no circumstance, and I repeat, under no circumstance, you may engage combat with any gryphoon party in the area. Understood?"

We nodded in approval.

"Also..." Celestia continued. "I want you to bring back my sister unharmed!"

"What?!" I protested. "Are you kidding, Cellie? That damned sister of yours is gonna fight back with teeth and nails, and she doesn't even have nails!"

Celestia angrily looked to me and walked some steps closer to me: "Listen to me, rascal. Now I'm not talking to you as your friend, but as your liege: You. Will. Not. Hurt her! Understood?!"

I sighed, put a fist in my chest and respectfully bent: "Yes, your Highness. Understood."

"Well, team. Bring my sister safe and sound back home. Carry on!" Ordered Celestia.

"At once, Your Highness!"

I cast my flying cloud again, and invited Twilight to mount up, but she refused, and mounted a balloon with Shining Armor. Rainbow Dash and Storm Chaser tied themselves to the balloon to propel it, so I was on my own. No complaints, I guess?

Actually... yes. I had a complaint. And I'll feel very bad in disobeying Celestia's order. Not because I could be fearing any punishment, but because I truly respected her. So, I sighed and turned to her: "Listen Cellie, truly, I'll try to obey that order, but if she ends up hurting or killing any of my friends, I..."

Celestia looked at me with a blank expression: "Rascal, then I think that it'll be better to you to not going in this mission."

"Cellie, what are you talking about?! Then you'll be sending all this ponies to a certain death!" I protested, pointing to them with my open hand.

All the present ponies gasped and facehoofed, looking to her, perplexed.

"That's not going to happen, because I'm going too." Replied Celestia.

"WHAT?!" Everypony and me shouted at the same time.

Twilight jumped down from the balloon's basket: "No, Your Highness, you can't risk yourself like this! Not again!" She shouted, concerned.

"Don't worry, my faithful student. I'm starting to get used to this." Replied Celestia.

I put my fists on my waist and angrily agreed: "Cellie, Twilight is right. What your sister wants is TO KILL YOU!" I pointed her with a finger. "So, the worst thing that you can do is to put yourself at her reach!"

"You leave me no with other choice, rascal!" She angrily replied to me. "What kind of ruler would I be, if I come to allow the murdering of my own sister?!"

"A ruler that thinks on her subjects and accepts that her sister is a bloody murder who deserves death!" I angrily replied to her, defiantly opening my hands.

Celestia wide opened her muzzle, and then, angrily shooking her head, walked to me: "Listen to me, rascal, I'm going to take my sister back, and you'll have to kill me to impede me to!" She scowled and clenched her teeth.

Twilight quickly stepped between us, standing on her hinder legs and putting a foreleg in front of each one, very nervous: "Please, don't start with this again. I know you love each other. Lovers doesn't kill each other. Please, reconsider..." She pleaded, quickly looking to one and another.

I looked to Twilight, perplexed: "What? 'Lovers'? Twilight, what are you talking about?"

Twilight looked to me, shocked: "Wait. But... you're not lovers?" Then, she looked to Celestia. "Your Highness, what's happening here?"

I put my fists on my waist again, suspecting that Celestia had something to do with my break up with Twilight: "Yes, Cellie. What's happening here?"

At that very moment, as if the tension weren't bad enough, Pinkie Pie appeared, galloping to us: "Shinny, my love! I made it on time! You filthy pug, you were leaving without letting me know! I've brought your cupcakes for the trip!"

From the other side, as if they were set some kind of agreement, Rarity and Fluttershy appeared too: "Yay!" They said at the same time: "We made it on time! I have something very important to tell..." They both stopped speaking and looked to each other, perplexed.

"Flutters, are you some kind of mind reader, dear?" Asked Rarity, shrugging an eye.

"I... I was about to ask you the same question, Rares." Replied Fluttershy, surprised too.

I decided to ignore all that turmoil, and looked back to Celestia: "Well, Cellie. I'm waiting."

"What?" She asked, as if stunned.

"Yes, because I wanna hear it too!" Added Twilight, scowling.

Celestia's heart looked like it was gonna pump out from her chest: "I... I don't know of what you're talking about..."

"You don't..." I chuckled, looking for a side, then turning my sight back to her. "You forced Twilight to buck me out, didn't you?"

"What?!" Celestia backed off, scared. "No! I..."

"Cellie!" I forwarded my head, shrugging an eye.

"No! I didn't! Twilight did it by her free will!"

I looked to Twilight with my mouth opened.

"I did it because she told me she was into you!" Twilight explained with tearful eyes, pointing Celestia with a foreleg.

Everypony gasped of surprise.

I looked to Celestia: "What?! Then why did you bucked me out?!"

"Because you were flirting with Cadance!"

"What?!" Shinning Armor angrily jumped off. "You were WHAT?!! You shameless freeloader, Cadance is mine!" He pointed himself with a foreleg.

"What?!" Pinkie angrily jumped as well. "Cadance is not yours! I AM YOURS! Were you cheating on me, you filthy pug?!"

"No! He's the only cheater here!" Replied Shinning Armor, pointing at me with a foreleg. "Send him to the hospital again! It's an order!"

"What?!! Shinny! How could you ask me such thing?!" Angrily replied Pinkie.

"Don't you dare! Now I can predict your moves! I won't let you to hurt my beloved one!" Rainbow Dash appeared between Pinkie and me.

"He's not your beloved one! It's MY beloved one!" Rarity interrupted her, scowling and pointing herself with a foreleg.

"No, he's MY beloved one!" Blurted Fluttershy, scowling too.

Rarity angrily looked to the yellow pegasi: "I called it first!"

"But he moved with me first!" Replied Fluttershy.

"And I gave him a job first!" Rarity replied back.

Storm Chaser angrily stepped to Rainbow Dash: "Then, this was why you let me hanging out on our date?! You were using me as a BAIT?!"

"And so what if I did?!" Angrily replied Dashie to the pegasi stallion.

"Cellie, why you didn't told me anything?!" I required her.

"I told you I wanted you to surprise me!"

"That's not an excuse!!"

Twilight looked to the center: The human and ponies arguing among them, she looked right: More ponies arguing among them, then to the left: Even more ponies arguing among them. Soon, the mixing of the voices of all the ponies -and human- speaking at the same time, had become some sort of unintelligible 'Blah blah blah blah blah' to her.

Twilight scowled and clenched the teeth, and started to tremble, until she couldn't take no more.

"EVERYPONY SHADDDAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!!!" She raised the head and screamed so loud and with so much passion, that everypony, and even me, stopped speaking and looked to her, perplexed.

Twilight panted a bit, to recover from the effort: "Do you realize how stupid is this?! You look like a bunch of foals and fillies, fighting for a toy! Shame on you!" She angrily scolded us.

Everypony, even Celestia and me, lowered the head, embarrassed.

Then, Twilight turned to Celestia: "Your Highness, how could you do this to me?! Why didn't you told me that you weren't lovers?! You drove me into six months of a Tartarus of suffering, for no reason! HOW COULD YOU?!!" She angrily and quickly hit the ground several times with her forelegs, with tearful eyes.

Celestia sadly looked to Twilight: "My faithful student, I'm sorry. I know I should have told you." Se put a hoof in her chest. "I just couldn't find the word..."

She couldn't finish the word 'words', because Twilight tossed a book right in her face, so violently, that made her to turn around with a short pained gasp, trembling from pain and with closed eyes, and pressing with a hoof her sore and bleeding right nostril.

"Your Highness!!" The two Royal Guard captains and the pegasi pulling Celestia's royal chariot galloped to her: "Are you alright?! You're hurt!"

Then Shinning Armor angrily looked to his sister: "Little sister! How could you attack Celestia?! Now I have to forget that you're my sister and arrest you!"

"No, no, no." Celestia raised the other foreleg. "It's alright, it's alright. I deserved this."

"Your Highness! Are you sure?!"

"Yes, yes. I am." She nodded.

Then, Twilight looked to me: "My loooooove..." She cried, shedding plenty of tears, and galloped to me.

I bent a bit and happily opened my arms, and Twilight jumped to me with such speed, that I hit the floor with my buttocks, but I couldn't care less, as I was with my beloved marefriend again, kissing, hugging and cuddling like mad.

"My love." She told me between kisses and cuddles. "How I missed you. How I needed you. I thought I was gonna die..."

Rainbow Dash looked to a side, and then she turned to Storm Chaser: "Hey, Stormy... I... I think we might have started with the left hoof..." She drew a big smile in her face.

"That's Captain Storm Chaser for you, young pegasi, and don't you dare to flirt with me anymore! Understood?!" Angrily replied the stallion, shrugging his eyes. The smile slowly dissapeared from Rainbow Dash's face.

Pinkie looked to a side as well, and she looked to Shinning Armor: "So... filthy pug... How this leave us, then?"

"Filthy pug?" Asked the white unicorn.

"Yeah, humm. Dashie just called her coltfriend 'Stormy', and they broke up, see?..."

Shining Armor chuckled: "Bucking horns. You're funny even when you don't meant to."

Pinkie smiled, hopeful: "Then, that means that we were ok? Are we still getting married next Heart and Hooves Day?"

"I don't know, miss Pie. I still have feelings for Cadance. We had a three-year engagement. You know?"

"Yeah. I bet it's hard to let it go... so... maybe it will be the best... that I... just..." Sadly suggested Pinkie, and, looking to the floor with deflated mane and tail, turned around to leave.

"Wait, miss Pie." Said Shining Armor, making her to look back. "I haven't decided yet. You know?"

Pinkie just gave him a sad smile, and looking to her front again, silently walked back to Sugarcube Corner.

Rarity looked up: 'Wait! They had a three-year engagement?! A pleb and a Princess?! Then, why can't I have an engagement with Prince Blueblood?! Ow! How silly of me!' She tought, and, after saying all the goodbyes, turned around and left with a hopeful smile.

Finally, Celestia just got tired of seeing Twilight and me cuddling and interrupted us: "Hem-hem! Rascal, Twilight. You still have a mission to fulfill."

Twilight and me broke the hug, and I stood up: "Alright, Cellie..." Then, I noticed her bleeding nostril: "Let me heal that..."

But Celestia stopped me with a foreleg: "No, rascal, no. Let it heal naturally. Sometimes I need to remember that I'm not invulnerable."

"And not errorproof, either." I scolded her, pointing her with a finger. "I'm not gonna forget what you made to pass through to Twilight and me. Now I'm starting to understand why you sister hates you so much."

Celestia lowered the head and closed the eyes, embarrassed.

Then, I added with a sarcastic tone: "Now, excuse me. I have to pick some stuff for your 'mission'." And I cast my flying cloud: "Coming, love?" I asked to my marefriend.

"Just a minute, love." She said, then, she looked to Celestia, and also told her with a sarcastic tone: "And, Your Highness, you should head back to Canterlot. There's no need to risk yourself for 'no reason'." And later she added, but with a scolding tone this time: "Besides, you playing that victim's role of yours won't help changing Luna's mind, anyway." Then, she happily turned to me: "Coming, love!" And hopped to my cloud, and we flown to Fluttershy's cottage, so I could pick my stuff, as I was returning to the oak library after all.

Celestia, on her side, hopped on her Royal chariot, and indicated the pegasi to take her back to Canterlot, which they did.

Then, everypony had setted things up.

Everypony, but Fluttershy.

She just stood there, trembling, unable to move, unable to think, unable to even breath. Her Teddy Bear! Twilight had stolen her Teddy Bear, the one that she had dreamed so many nights to be hers! She took him just before her snout and there was nothing, nothing, that she could do!

Finally, the imperious need to breath made her to come back to her senses, even against her will. She was wishing she could hold her breath up to death. Her world was crumbling. All her dreams and hopes had been crushed in a single sweep. Nothing made sense to her anymore. She could easily take a knife and pierce her heart with no second tought.

"Flutters. Are you alright?" Rainbow Dash asked her, concerned.

Fluttershy looked to Rainbow Dash, with quivering and tearful closed eyes: "I want to dieeeeee..." She sadly mumbled, sobbing with crying voice.

"No, no, no, no, no! Flutters, look at me, look at me!" Rainbow Dash held her from her shoulders, making her to half lidding the eyes and to look her right to her eyes. "You have to be strong! You have to be strong and pass through this!"

"I caaaaan't... (sobs) I'm so weak... so useless... (sobs) Nopony loves me... (sobs) Nopony needs meeeeee..." Fluttershy sobbed with meekly voice, twitching lips and closed tearful eyes again.

"That's not true! I... I need you!" Said Rainbow Dash, hugging her.

"Really?" Fluttershy asked, hopeful. "Then... that's why you kept (sniff) defending me all this time?"

"Yes, yes! Exactly!" Confirmed Rainbow Dash.

"Thank you, Dashie. Thank you. You're the best -and only- friend I truly have." Fluttershy hugged her as well.

"Don't worry, Flutters. I'll help you to find somepony to love you... as a couple, I mean." Rainbow Dash smiled.

Fluttershy gave her a sad smile, drying her tears: "Thank you, Dashie. That... (sniff) that'll be great... (sniff)"

Pinkie returned to Sugarcube corner, and, instead to get back to her workplace at the cake shop, she, with tearful eyes and a sad grimace, galloped upstairs until her room, and she threw herself on her bed to cry, sinking her head in the pillow:

"He's gonna leave meeeee... (sobs) He's gonna leave me, I know iiiiiit... (sobs) He's gonna leave me, and I'll have no other but to dieeeee..."

When Fluttershy finally got back her home, she get surprised from some strange noises coming from inside. Using her sneaking abilities, she silently and undetected half-opened the door, catching a glimpse of what was happening: The shirtless human and Twilight, tangled in a love-making madness. Fluttershy slowly and silently closed the door, and walked to the brook on her garden, grabbed Angel, who was nearby, eating some carrots, dropped to the grass, and sadly looked to her reflection in the clear waters.

"I'd like to be a tree..." She barely mumbled