Roomies

Intricate Weave sighed as he walked up to the door of his apartment. Well...that date was a bust. And he just knew his roommates were going to make it worse. Well, one of them was, anyways. The other was well behaved and actually a moderating agent. Surprisingly enough.

The stallion was a unicorn pony, with the standard spiraling horn on his forehead. His coat was a light blue, while his mane and tail were dark green with a streak of yellow running through them. His mark was that of a standard spell matrix, but the runes seemed to shift when they weren’t watched. To signify his talent at coming up with new spell ideas. Not that he could cast them all or that they were all good ideas. But every so often he had a good one, submitted it to the researchers up in Canterlot, and got a cut of the money they made off it. His royalties off the spells he’d helped make weren’t anything to scoff at.

Still, he didn’t like fame or attention, so he lived a nice, quiet life in Ponyville. Well...as quiet as one could get. He was still an upstanding citizen and mostly helped to evacuate the townsfolk when something major was happening (once a week, like clockwork). So it really shouldn’t have been that much of a surprise when he was asked if he would house two parolees while they served their sentence.

In the end he’d capitulated, because nopony else would be capable of coming up with a spell on the fly if something went wrong. Still, he made them pay rent. Not because he needed it, he didn’t. He just wanted them to contribute and have a productive job.

The stallion pushed the door open and sighed. “I’m home,” he announced to the house at large, closing the door behind him as he trotted inside. His saddlebags were put to the side as he wandered into the living room.

The room almost seemed split in two. The left half of the couch, and coffee table in front of it, was immaculately clean. As was a black Lay-Z-Colt. A black chitined mare with a lacy green mane, and blue-green eyes, quietly sat on the couch. In her hooves was a novel, “A Better You” by Mindscape. The right half of the room was a mess. Candy wrappers, cans, tissues, various magazines were on the floor, the right half of the coffee table, and all over the other half of the couch. A pink mare with a purple mane, and a cutie mark of some kind of teal glimmer, was laying upside down on the couch. She was chewing on something and staring at the TV as her lit horn levitated a Gamestation controller. A can levitated up from the floor and was poured into the mares open mouth. Gunfire erupted from the TV, occasionally making the insectoid mare wince.

The chitinous mare smiled as Weave entered. “You’re back! How did it go?”

“He’s not bringing her home and he’s obviously here, so he probably bombed.” The pink mare said bluntly, not looking away from the TV.

The chitinous mare frowned at the pink mare. Her horn lit green as, simultaneously, the game paused, the controller was set on the coffee table, and the TV shut off.

“Hey!” The pink mare whined.

“You could at least greet Weave.” A chitinous hoof, covered in holes, gestured at the stallion. “I’m sorry, I tried to keep it clean, I really did. The rest of the apartment is good, I also tidied up your room on the chance that you’d be bringing company over.”

“Thank you Chrys,” the stallion smiled at her. “And yeah...things didn’t turn out well. I mean, I showed up on time, I was nice, I complimented her...it was going great. We ordered lunch, it was delivered, and then suddenly,” he slammed one forehoof into the other. “She sees something over my shoulder, shouts ‘Dash!’ and takes off. Leaving me with two half-eaten lunches and a bill.”

“Sucks to be you.” The pink mare snorted, rolling over and shaking her head violently as she moved into a sitting position, accompanied by the sound of crinkling bags.

“You’re welcome.” ‘Chrys’ gasped. “Oh! I have great news! I had my final meeting with Twilight, my last meeting with Misty, and I paid off my court costs! By next week, I will be off parole!” She gave a happy, yet sharp-toothed grin. “Though, I still have to check in with Twilight every year on my birthday.” She immediately wilted. “A-also, I was encouraged to find a partner so I don’t have any relapses. Sooo I’ll probably be joining the dating game too.” She gave a weak smile. “What a way to ring in the new year huh?

“You can be whoever you want, it won’t be that hard.” The pink mare rolled her eyes.

“No shapeshifting. That’s what Twilight said. I have to get used to being me.” Chrys nodded. “I won’t let you get to me Starlight.”

“Mm.” Weave grunted as he sat in his armchair, which was thankfully on the cleaner side of the room. “Good advice all around,” he eventually commented. “I’m glad to see you taking this so seriously.”

“It took me long enough.” Chrys nodded with a wince. “I still feel bad about the few times I didn’t clean up after I… hmmph.” She coughed into her hoof with a bright green blush on her cheeks.

“Still kinda gross that you cum eggs.” Starlight deadpanned, magically tugging a bag out from behind her back and tossing it on the floor.

“Star, behave,” Weave chided her from the chair. “Otherwise I’ll stick a level-seven magi-lock on your horn. Again.”

“Fine. Fine.” Star rolled her eyes.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I got so excited, I kinda took over the conversation.” Chrys gasped suddenly. “So! You’re date! Or, lack.. Thereof… Ummm… Anything I can do to help, a hug, cuddles, bath, BJ?”

Weave eyed the bugmare warily. “What was that last one?” he asked.

“Bath- Oh… Sorry! Sorry! It slipped out!” Chrys’s blush grew. “F-forget that last one!”

“I mean, he didn’t score so you choking on his dick is probably the only thing he’ll get tonight.” Star snorted a lewd smirk at the two.

Chrys tried to make her rather large form shrink further into the couch.

“Star, one more word out of you and I’ll bump it up to level eight,” the stallion threatened.

“Ugh… fine.” Star rolled off the couch and stomped off down the hallway until she ducked to the left and slammed her door. Chrys jumped at the slam.

“Sorry…” Chrys said quietly.

“Not your fault,” the stallion quipped. “Honestly, I could do with some cuddling to make me forget about how the date didn’t go. What’s on?”

Chrys patted the couch seat next to her with a hoof as her green aura poked the TV remote. “It’s been mainly New Year’s prep and the occasional action movie, depending on the channel. Which is why Star switched to playing Resistance. Kinda felt like a passive aggressive dig, because the enemies are Changelings, but, I just tried to get lost in my book.”

“Weak,” the stallion commented. “Oh. Idea. Where were we in Minecraft? I was being the miner, you were building a base for me to drop stuff off in, we were having fun. I remember we were doing something big…”

“You had found a big run of Diamonds and I’d just completed the library for enchanting. Oh, I also made progress on fishing, found you a few Mending books while turning Minecraft into a clicker game.” The bugmare giggled.

“Sweet,” the stallion got up and trotted over to the couch, sitting next to the bugmare. “We need…” he counted on a hoof. “Five at least. Three to make a diamond pickaxe, which we’ll use to mine up four obsidian, and the other two and a spare book to make the table itself. The rest of the diamonds we leave until we get fortune 3 on a pick. Then we get all the gear.”

“Yay planning.” Chrys quietly cheered. “Sooo… Planning on seeing the mare again? You know, if she shows up to explain why she took off?”

“I mean, she was cute, but that was also because I think she just became a mare,” the stallion pointed out. “It felt like she was trying too hard to date the first stallion she thought was ‘cool enough’ for her. Like I had to try to impress her. Anytime I tried to share what I do for work with her, she was all ‘uh huh’ and whispered something under her breath.” Weave booted up the game and passed the second controller over to Chrysalis. “Okay, so...hmm. How many levels have you managed to get while fishing?”

“Ugh… that… Ugh, that makes me uncomfortable just hearing that. You’ll find a nice mare who’s interested in your work.” Chrys smiled. “And ummm…” Her wings popped up as she blushed. “I’m… level… fifty?” She grinned awkwardly at him. “Sorry.”

“Hey, it’s fine,” the stallion grinned. “Okay, so, I’ll make the pick. You need to put some books and lapis in a nice big chest in the library’s antechamber or wherever, somewhere where they won’t interfere with the table working. It’ll be your job to fish around in the table until it gives you two fortune 2 books. We’ll combine them in an anvil, get fortune 3, and stick that and the mending book on the diamond pick. Then we can get an undying pickaxe that gets us all the goodies.”

“Oooo! Got it! Imma go gets me a chest and the stuffs for the chest~” Chrys sang. “Yay… Say, sorry to harp on the dating topic, but, do you think I could find a mare, you know, if I’m actually me?”

“I’m sure there will be somepony out there for you,” the stallion commented. “Somepony who will look at your shapechanging as a wonderful trick for the bedroom, and not as a ‘oh my Celestia you fooled me into dating you’ trick. I mean, I’m pretty sure there’s somepony out there who’ll love you for you and only occasionally ask you to turn into, I dunno, Twilight or something.” There was a dinging noise. “Obsidian gathered. Time to make the table! Coming out of the mine and- wow, you decorated.”

“Yeah! You like it? I kinda stayed up to make it all pretty.” Chrys grinned then blushed again. She coughed. “And Ummm and my… ovipositor issue? I’m sorry! I’ll drop it!”

“You might need a few mares,” the stallion commented. “One to date, and one to get stuffed. Oh wow, thanks, I would have gotten lost without the signage. Okay! Library, oh, you thought ahead. Crafting benches in every room?”

“Why wouldn’t I separate out the crafting areas? Oh! Look down the mountain! I made a thing. Well… I made a village. A… big… village.” Chrys maintained her blush. “I may have spent a couple… few hours on it…” Chrys hummed. “And thanks for the multiple mares idea- Oooo I wonder if Lyra and Bon Bon would be interested. That would be a bit of an awkward conversation… Hey, so I was wondering if you two would like an awkward third wheel? Oh and how does one of you feel about getting thirty eggs pumped into you in five seconds?”

“Probably start them off with a date at the local coffee house first,” the stallion commented. “Enchanting table, smack in the middle of the library. Now you get to fish around in the table until you find enough Fortune books to make a fortune 3 book. Meanwhile...I have some more obsidian and a plan.”

“True.” Chrys nodded. “So, what are you making? Oh, and want anything to drink? I got a few kinds of bubbly earlier today.”

“Sugar soda, made with real sugar,” the stallion commented. “Do you have a room that you can easily secure and is large enough for a new structure to be added to it?”

“Absolutely, top floor has a blocked off doorway to the right of the stairs.” Chrys commented as her horn glowed. A soda can, a bottle of apple bubbly, and a glass levitated out of the kitchenette and onto the coffee table.

“Cheers,” Weave popped the can and levitated it up close to his muzzle. “Okay, I don’t need fourteen, but I like having the corner pieces. All of them placed...flint and steel, and-”

“Beware the pigpones!” Chrys gasped.

“Eh, just don’t smack them and you’re fine,” the stallion chuckled. “Besides, I’m only going in for quartz and to map the place a little bit. Also to secure the other side with a nice box and an iron door.”

“Still, be careful.” Chrys warned, pouring herself some bubbly. “Lemme know if you need help. I’ve gotten pretty good with a bow.”

“Let’s just see what’s on the other side,” the stallion hummed. “Okay...pretty clear around the portal and- no. No way. That’s a fortress! Just over that massive lake of lava, but I can see it over there!”

“Gimme a minute and I’ll build you a bridge.” Chrys replied. “Want me to snipe Blazes for you?”

“Nah, I need to look up how to make a Blaze Box anyways, but that’s a worry off my shoulders. Infinite source of rods. That’s one more step! I just came for the- there’s some quartz. Now I can upgrade our smeltery to be actually smart!” The stallion took an iron pick and mined out a whole vein of quartz for use in his plan.

“Got stone blocks for days, bridge is under construction, three layers deep just in case, and I’ll start boxing it in. I’ll torch it at first until I get something better to light it with.” Chrys hummed while taking a drink of her bubbly.

“Well if you’ve got a nice fortune book, I can get you some glowstone lamps to use in your decoration now,” the stallion commented. “Fortune basically means I can mine a whole block of glow without losing any. Wrap it in redstone and you get a lamp.”

“Oooooo! Glowstone...” Chrys cooed. “Oh, and wanna do anything special for New Years later?”

“Eh, my fam typically celebrates the first day rather than the last,” the stallion replied easily. “Gonna work on the smeltery now, and- oooh, that looks nice. You made ramps up to the input chests. But yeah, we typically have like, little trays of sweet gherkins and black olives, sandwiches and all sorts of snacks throughout the day rather than any big dinner. Saves us having to cook. Plus we watch the flower floats, the Rose Bowl parade. Not so much the buckball game afterwards.”

“Well wanna do something like that tomorrow?” Chrys asked. “I mean, I don’t have plans.”

Weave blinked. “I mean, I’d have to find a place that still has sandwich trays and the like. They’re mostly sold out for the parties that are happening tonight. Also...done. Now the super smelter should input items into all the smelteries at the same rate. Things to be smelted and the fuel alike.”

“Yay. What’s next on the plan?” The bugmare asked.

“Got that book?” the stallion asked, sipping his soda.

“Yep I do!” Chyrs grinned.

“Cool cool,” the stallion said. “Bring it and the mending book to the anvil, and I’ll slap them on this diamond pick. Then we just need...unbreaking 3 and efficiency 5, but those can be later. Fortune/Mending is undying as is, if you mine the right things.”

“And…. here are things.” The bugmare said, chugging the rest of her bubbly.

“Perfect! Behold the ultimate pick with which to mine diamonds!” the stallion chuckled madly. “And now, I’ma go find all those diamonds I left behind and get us all the gear we could ever need.”

“You do that, I’m going to fortify that bridge.” Chrys said, sticking her tongue out.

“Mhm. Diamond armor for everyone. Fortune 3 basically means ‘always getting 2, sometimes getting 3 diamonds from one ore.” The stallion hummed a little song as he went down into the mines.

“You are a pone and you’re diggin a hole, diggy diggy hole~” Chrys started to sing.

“Heh, sometimes I regret teaching you that song,” the stallion chuckled. “Okay, vein one. Vein...two. Three, four, five…”

Chrys’s voice shifted as her fire briefly rolled over her neck. “Ye hornhead, ye don’t got enough drink te make a proper diggin pone.”

“True, but I don’t tend to drink anyways,” the stallion pointed out. “I stock it for Star, but eh. I can take it or leave it. And that’s the last diamond vein.” The stallion whistled happily as he came back up to the smeltery room. “Go on, why don’t you guess how many blocks of pure diamond I’ll be able to make.”

“Ehhhmmmm…” Her voice returned to normal. “Five?”

“Try half a stack,” the stallion replied cheekily. “I found a lot of diamond and just left it alone, ya know.”

“Shit, really?” Chrys blinked, pouring herself more bubbly.

“Armor for everyone!” the stallion cheered. “Oh, but uh, hmm. We’re going to want protection 4, unbreaking 3, and mending on everything. And feather fall on the boots.” He shrugged at Chrys’ incredulous expression. “Hey, do you want to replace all our gear when it breaks? Mending means it heals off of gained XP, and that means you put it on and go to the mob grinders to fix things.”

“Yes please on everything.” Chrys nodded happily.

“Question,” Weave interjected. “That town. Did you fill it with villagers?”

Chrys slowly looked down at him. “Obviously. Each villager has a job and I’ve already leveled quite a few of them, and yes, there are golems about.”

“Okay, while I could steal a few to make an iron golem farm-” Weave said, holding up a hoof to stop her outburst. “Could! Not going to! But. Librarians. If they get leveled up enough, they can sell Mending books.”

“Oh right, I saw one or two.” Chrys nodded with a hum. “You can go check, or I could go check.”

“There’s a loop you can do though,” the stallion smirked. “You can buy bookcases, break them, sell the books back to them, they’ll eventually lower their prices...and you start making emeralds. Cheap, easy, fast way to level up a librarian.”

“Ooooo!” Chrys cooed. “Nice!”

Out of the blue, there came a knocking at the door.

“Oop! Door!” Chrys paused the game.

“Here, I’ll just drop out, you can work on your building,” the stallion offered, letting Chrysalis continue to play while he got up and went to the door. His horn glowed as his magic turned the doorknob.

“Kay!” The bugmare called out.

Weave looked out the door. Paused. And went to close it again.

“Who is it?” Chyrs called.

“Somepony who better start talking, fast,” the stallion growled.

“Kay?” The bugmare called.

“I’m sorry!” Came from the other side of the door.

“That’s all you have to say?” Weave narrowed his eyes.

“No- Just- Sorry for bailing like that. My sister flew by and she’s never home, so I went to catch up for a moment, but the moment I said that I was on a date she yelled at me, then I went back and you were gone, and I found out you paid the bill, so I felt bad, and I found out you lived here, so I came by to say sorry, and- here.” There was a jingle of bits. “I got your bits back and paid for the meals. And I wanted to say that I’d like to try again. If… you want to. And I’m sorry if I seemed uninterested! I just- It was flying over my head and I was trying to figure out what you were saying. And- Yeah. It was a mess and It’s my fault and I’d like to try again, maybe coffee, or something.”

“There’s bubbly inside and the rude roommate is sulking.” Chrys called out. “It’s New Years, come hang out and chill with us.”

“Yeah, we’ve got Minecraft, and we just hit a few tipping points,” the stallion commented. “She’s an amazing builder, I’m a decent miner and technical stallion, it works out.”

“It’s on the Gamestation!” Chrys called out.

“Need a good warrior? I’ve kinda had some practice thanks to Sweetie and Button getting me into it.” The voice said with a clear chuckle of embarrassment.

“Hey, no reason to worry. In fact…” the stallion opened the door further to let the mare on the other side in. “Hey Chrys, you got a Looting sword up and running yet? Slap some sharpness and sweeping edge on it as well as mending and unbreaking, and we can send the newb out to hunt some Enderpones for the next major phase.”

“Gotcha.” Chrys called out, magically dragging more drinks, glasses, and food out onto coffee table while also sweeping the trash off of it. “Sorry for the mess. The roomie is a bit of a hog.”

“It’s fine-” The mare that stepped in was a pegasi or burnt orange coat, purple mane, and violet eyes. As well as a pair of slightly smaller wings than normal. “You’re- You’re-”

“Yes, Queen Chrysalis, Changeling Queen and recovering villain.” Chrys sighed. “Welcome to the apartment.”

“Thanks… Ummm where do I sit?” The mare asked. “O-Oh and I’m Scootaloo.”

“Pleasure.” Chrys nodded and smiled. “Sit wherever.” she shrugged.

“Oh, hang on a moment,” the stallion said, before charging his horn and firing at the couch. The small charge activated a prepared array, and the couch jumped a little before it grew into a three-pony couch. “Ta-da, expandable couch,” Weave said with a smile, sitting next to Chrys. “Came up with it a month ago.”

Scootaloo trotted around and sat on the other side of Weave. Chrys levitated a controller over to the mare and she took it in her hooves. “Want me to sign in as Guest?”

“If you’re willing to try with our resident spell nerd, then go ahead and make yourself a log-in.” Chyrs chuckled and winked at Weave.

“Yeah, go on, just don’t take too long,” the stallion pointed out. “Miss builder probably is getting antsy about not being able to finish off some things.”

“So sue me if I like the feeling of building again. Reminds me of building a Hive.” Chrys bristled, her wings buzzing.

“Hey, it’s fine,” the stallion chuckled. “I like the challenge of beating the game, you like building the base up, there’s no wrong way to play. I would build, but I’m pretty sure I’m a terrible judge of what is and isn’t good looking. But at least I never get lost underground.”

“Oh, you’d think I’d have a memory for tunnels, but no I can’t find my way anywhere down there.” Chrys rolled her eyes.

Scootaloo snorted.

“Okay, so let’s hop back in,” Weave hummed. “Right. You’re going to want to head to the north and a bit east, we set up base around a mountain.”

“Gotcha.” Scootaloo. “You guys got a cartography table?”

“Yep.” Chrys nodded. “Oh want anything, we got Hanover pretzel pieces, cheetos, chips…”

“What kinda pretzel pieces.” Scootaloo asked.

“Eh, we got buffalo and honey mustard.” Chrys commented, levitating the bags up.

“Oooh, those both sound good,” the stallion noted out loud. “Hmm. Well you should be able to see our base when you get close thanks to somebug building the great wall around the village.”

“I like my defenses like I like my mares. Impregnable.” She blinked. “Wait…”

“Shit-” Scootaloo coughed as she tried not to inhale soda.

“Chrys, are you trying to choke our guest?” Weave deadpanned, his magic thumping Scoots on the back.

“I’m sorry, that slipped out.” Chrys once again sank into the couch.

“I hope that’s the only thing that slips out.” Scoots chuckled, as she got her breath back.

“Well if you’re brave, you could look between her legs and find a nice big throbbing-” Weave started to tease.

“A nice big throbbing what?” Scoots smirked and looked over at the bugmare.

“Nothing…” Chrys grumbled, blushing bright green.

Weave smirked. “Okay, so...I need to work on getting the materials together for a blaze box. Glass, stone, jack o lanterns, trapdoors, a sticky piston, some redstone...I’ll need a brewing stand, to make it somewhat easier too.”

“And I’m just going to murder anything I can find.” Scoots chuckled, returning to the TV.

“What do you need me to do again?” Chrys sighed.

“Hmm,” Weave hummed to himself. “Well if you have that bridge, then...Let’s think. Oh. Books, right. We need all the cool books to make sure our gear never dies, and you need to buy Mending off the villagers.”

“So I go and commit treeicide.” Chrys chuckled, relaxing.

“Could do,” the stallion admitted. “Okay, let’s work-”

“Fuck’s goin’ on out there? Can’t a mare jill in peace?” Star called out from her room.

“Dammit Star, that’s an hour with the mark seven lock!” Weave snapped.

“Ugh, what it’s not like- Oh... so that’s her.” There was a grumble. “Sorry, I suppose.”

“...Is that the first time she’s apologized for her antics?” Weave asked Chrysalis.

“Eh… I think so.” Chrys blinked.

“Congrats on growing as a pony, Star,” Weave called to the mare hiding elsewhere in the apartment.

“Whatever, I’m putting my headphones on and hoofing my bean till I pass out.” There was another slam.

“She seems… difficult.” Scoots blinked, shrugged and went back to the game.

“She is,” Weave sighed. “She does the bare minimum and thinks it’s good enough.”

“Oh. One of those ones. How is she worse than a reformed villain?” Scoots asked, then blinked at Chrys. “No offense.”

“None taken.” Chrys shrugged.

“Don’t ask me,” the stallion rolled his eyes. “I think she takes some perverse joy in breaking out of the magi-locks I put on her for her misbehavior. Speaking of,” the stallion’s horn lit up as a bolt of green light snaked through the apartment.

“Motherfucker!” Came from the room further in.

“And, just cause I’m curious, how perverse?” Scoots asked.

“Well they get harder to crack the more challenging they are, and I’m starting to integrate self-improving spellwork into the matrix,” the stallion mused. “So I think she’ll have about thirty minutes of straight challenging, fighting back spellwork to break through.”

“Thirty minutes of peace…” Chrys sighed.

“And I don’t know what that means but, yay?” Scoots blinked.

“It’d be like if you had to wrestle with a rope around your wings for thirty minutes before you could fly again,” Weave explained. “One that kept retying itself and acted more like a snake.”

“Gross.” Scoots made a disgusted face.

“I haven’t had to wear one in… How long?” Chrys hummed and looked at Weave.

“Six months?” the stallion mused. “Sounds right. You only got up to the mark three.”

“See, I’m doing better.” Chrys grinned toothily.

“Got a nice couple of fangs there.” Scoots pointed out.

“Thanks, they’re mostly for show. Mostly.” Chrys giggled.

“Whereas Star seems to try to beat her best time every time I slap her with a lock,” Weave pointed out.

“She really does get a weird kind of enjoyment out of it.” Chrys rolled her eyes.

“At least it buys us time where she’s busy focusing on the lock rather than making sex jokes,” the stallion grumbled.

“I mean, I don’t mind sex jokes. When in the right company.” Scoots shrugged.

“Weave is the most prudish one here. I’ve just calmed down a considerable amount.” Chrys snorted and nudged the stallion.

“Mostly because somepony has to keep the two of you in check,” the stallion grumbled. “Honestly, it’s like the pair of you want me at times.”

“Don’t want to make things awkward…” Chrys coughed and looked away. “More awkward. Can’t say the same for Stary. Plus, I don’t think you’d even be interested in a mare like me.”

“Hey, I’ve heard of weirder relationships.” Scoots patted the stallion’s leg.

Weave turned to Scootaloo and slowly raised an eyebrow in incredulity.

“What? Some couples are open.” Scootaloo pointed out. “And don’t even get my started on that royal, Princess Ember, King Thorax, and Spike threeway herd thing.”

“S-so, should we get back to the game, o-or would you two prefer to talk?” Chrys spoke up. “Or, I could just go to my room a bit…”

“It’s fine, we can talk while we play,” the stallion commented. “Okay, so the blaze box works like...I think this. Put down the light sources to stop them from spawning-”

“I’ve got some jack o lanterns.” Chrys spoke up, fidgeting out of the hole she made herself in the couch.

“So, if we’re being brutally honest. Weave, am I attractive?” Scoots asked, glancing at the stallion.

“You’re cute, but that’s the problem, I get the feeling that you’re young, fresh on the dating scene, and wanted to snag somepony as fast as possible,” the stallion commented. “Don’t get me wrong, I would still totally date you if you hadn’t made such a mess of the first date.”

“Actually, I’d just gotten out of a bad relationship with Rumble.” Scoots winced as her gaze returned to the game. “Like, really bad. Break up was a mess. You were the first guy I actually got the nerve to say yes to. Aaaand I went and fucked it up.”

“How could you be mad at that. Look at the face.” Chrys waved a hoof at the mare.

“Well, give me a mo-” the stallion put the last light source down and turned to Scoots. He winced at the expression on her face. “Eesh. Okay, fair. Sorry for the critique. I didn’t know you well enough to say any of that. So...what do you want out of a relationship with a nerd like me?”

“You’re cute, and while I don’t get any magic stuff, I like that you’re passionate about it. So, I like that you like talking about it. Who knows, you might be able to educate a stunted featherhead like me.” She shrugged.

“Already coming up with a spell for that, by the way,” the stallion pointed out. “I’m gonna have to go over it in my workbook of ideas, but I might be able to cobble together a custom spell for you. Okay, boundaries for the box made, let’s get to placing-”

“Whoa, wait a sec Weave. I just get a little winded after flying and can’t fly for as long as other pegasi. It’s not that big a deal. Definitely not something to worry your cute horn over.” She poked his horn with a hoof.

“Nope, gonna give you a spell now that you’re not acting like you were,” the stallion commented. “Might only take me a few more hours to figure it out. Okay, stone, check. Glass...This is the annoying part, because you can’t pick it back up if you put it in the wrong place.”

“I can help.” The mares said in unison.

“I need a glass casing to finish off the box, including the roof,” the stallion commented. “Also a piece of carpet, all the trapdoors, a hopper, some chests, and a slab. I have the redstone bits on me.”

“Uuuuhhh… I’ll get the stuff for that.” Scoots blinked. “Hey, counter question, What did you see in a stunted pegasus like me?”

“Well, you’re cute,” the stallion commented. “And you’re also eager about the things you understand. You seem to be the act-first type, which is a balance to everything else around here.” He shrugged. “Honestly, I don’t know enough about you yet to say what I like best about you.”

“Well, Since this is kinda a re-first date, plus bugmare-”

“Sorry for being awkward.”

“It’s good. I’m actually a bit of a mechanic-slash-inventor. And while your spell is nice, I have been working on a little something to help me fly. Though I might’ve been reading too many comics before I started the blueprints.” Scoots chuckled. “When I’m not doing personal projects, I fix things for other ponies. I got my cutie mark by ramshackling my old scooter back together for Pinkie’s kid.” She tapped her flank showing an image of a screw, a nut, and a bolt.

“Huh. We could probably make something awesome together,” the stallion mused. “Okay, the bits for the box are in place...Now for the dangerous part. Taking out the light source. Good thing I made a fire resistance potion first.”

“You do that. I’m gonna go hunt me some enderpones.” Scoots shrugged, before a smirk crossed her lips. “What kind of awesome things do you want to make together?”

“Don’t say anything, don’t say anything, don’t say anything.” Chrys mumbled, blushing.

“I dunno, you could do the technical side, I could do the magical side,” the stallion hummed. “Okay, blazes in the chamber. Pushing the button, and...yes! Haha! Infinite blaze rods!”

“Yay!” Chrys cheered.

“So you’re saying you want to pump your hot magic into my cold metal hole?” Scoots commented, glancing at the stallion.

“Crude metaphor, but it works,” the stallion commented. “Okay. Blazes are on lockdown, now we need to pretty up the place a bit so it’s a mite bit safer to be here.”

“Did…” Scoots blinked and looked at Chrys. “Did he not get the joke or is he so used to them at this point that they don’t do anything for him?”

“Eh.” Chrys shrugged. “The way to the fortress is clear by the way and… well bend me over and spank me cause I’m a bad girl, portal. End Portal. That’s not supposed to be here. Is this from an update or something? Or is it a trap?”

“Wait, what?” the stallion blinked. “End Portal already? That has to be a trap. We haven’t yet managed to make any eyes of ender.”

“I mean it’s not filled.” Chrys mentioned.

“Like me… yet.” Scoots snorted.

“So… eh?” The bugmare shrugged.

“Well, mark it and we’ll get to it,” the stallion shrugged. “Infinite blazes, how many eyes do we need to fill it?”

“Let’s see.. Three. Six. Nine. Twelve!” Chrys grinned.

“Oh, twelve enough for you Chrys?” Scoots gave the mare a lewd smirk.

“Pfffft, twelve’s an off day.” Chrys waved a hoof. “Gimme a good hole to let off my steam and I can take thirty in a day, easy.”

“I get the feeling you both are talking about something incredibly lewd,” Weave deadpanned.

“Dicks.” Scoots deadpanned.

“She’s low key calling me a slut.” Chrys chuckled.

“Uhuh,” the stallion rolled his eyes. “How’s that ender hunting going, Scoots?”

“Fuckin’ Enderpones aren’t dropping eyes.” Scoots snorted.

“You did get the looting sword, right?” Weave raised an eyebrow. “Also, they should be dropping pearls, we make them into eyes.”

Scoots blinked. “Right… Huh. Turns out I have thirty pearls. Shows how much I’m paying attention.”

“Okay then, six blaze rods, to you,” the stallion commented. “Break them down and make the eyes, stick them in the portal, but for the love of the goddess, do not go in yet. We don’t have cool armor or bows.”

“Teamwork. Yay.” Chrys commented.

“Hmm,” the stallion hummed. “We have almost everything we’d need. Armor, check. Weapons, check. We should each get some slow falling potions before we go in.”

There was the sound of a door opening and a sound of hooves. A silver ring covered in cracks dropped into Weave’s lap. “Nice one.” Star commented. “Here for drinks. Then I’ll leave you to your eventual threesome.”

“And a happy new fucking year to you Star,” the stallion commented. “Did you time yourself?”

“Came in three minutes.” Star commented, taking a drink out of an apple bubbly bottle. “Oh, you meant the lock. Eh, twenty-five minutes. I’m getting faster.” She smirked as she propped herself up on the couch to rest her forelegs about Weave’s head.

“So you are, might be time to upgrade you to the mark eight,” the stallion mused.

“Mark Eight, what are you, a techpriest?” Star snorted.

“I don’t know what she references half the time.” Chrys mentioned to the pegasi.

“I got it.” Scoots nodded with a chuckle.

“Just an inventor of spellwork who can’t stop tinkering,” the stallion commented. “Oh, you’ll like this feature. Mark eight locks have a bit of artificial intelligence in the spellwork. Meaning they learn how you beat them and act against that ever working again.”

“Keep talking like that and I may have to come over more often.” Scoots giggled. “Talk nerdy to me.”

“Oh great… Another one.” Star rolled her eyes.

“I think it’s cute.” Chrys snorted and glared at the mare still drinking from the bottle.

“Okay, so…” The stallion hummed. “Trading abuse time,” he eventually decided. “I’ll do the loop with the villagers for mending and whatever other books I think are worthwhile. Meanwhile, you two can enchant some books to be useful for our gear.”

“Anything specific?” Chrys asked.

“More mending wouldn’t be too bad.” Scoots hummed.

“Huh. This actually looks halfways decent.” Star deadpanned. “Even though it’s spending time with you two… three… She’s okay.” She pointed a hoof at Scoots.

“Should I be worried that she might actually like me?” Scoots asked.

“It is a first and that’s kinda concerning.” Chrys glanced between the two.

“I’m just waiting for the other horseshoe to dro-” Weave spoke up.

“And I’m bored. Don’t barge in unless you wanna see a mare being debauched.” Star trotted off, bottle still held in her magic.

“Whelp, that’s still politer than she has been,” the stallion commented.

“Is she growing as a pony?” Chrys blinked.

“I mean, she can’t always be a flankhole right?” Scoots shrugged. “Ooooo glowstone, gonna make use of that.”

“Yup yup, lamps are fun,” the stallion nodded. “And eh, I wouldn’t say she’s growing. More like being nudged in the right direction via very large sticks.”

“Just be careful where you put the sticks.” Scoots snorted.

“I can cut the sexual tension with a knife.” Chrys said dryly.

“I’ve grown numb to it,” the stallion rolled his eyes.

“Awww… Can’t I fix that?” Scoots asked.

“I mean, you could try. I think Star and I broke him within the first couple of months.” Chrys sighed.

“I think it was somewhere around the third time you shoved your ovipositor in her ass and had her cumming eggs out her mouth,” the stallion nodded.

“Ex-fucking-scuse you?” Scoots blinked.

“I haven’t done that in over a year!” Chrys squeaked out. “I actually haven’t done anything in… about the same amount of time.”

“Damn. And Star just let it happen?” Scoots raised a brow.

“No. She kinda… jumped me… in the living room… then Weave trotted in.” Chrys wilted.

“Before that it was the kitchen,” the stallion commented. “Before that it was my room. Tartarus, I still found Star in there sometimes. It’s why I put up an anti-Starlight shield on my room. Phasic, so she can’t teleport past it.”

“Star’s not abusive per say… just… She was pushy for awhile.” Chrys wasn’t looking at either of them.

“Well were you behaved?” Scoots asked, tilting her head to the side.

“I had a rough start, but I wanted to do better.” Chrys sighed. “Star was a terrible influence.”

“You speak in the past tense like she still isn’t terrible,” the stallion pointed out.

“Fine!” Chrys snapped. “Star is a terrible mare who treats us like shit, who regularly tries to make me relapse, and who is flat out aggressive to the both of us!” The bugmare snarled as her horn lit and her eyes glowed. She snorted heavy breaths.

“Thata girl,” the stallion chuckled. “I’m sure your therapist would be proud.”

Chrys deflated. “I… kinda became a bit of a doormat.”

“Well, you convinced me you’re not.” Scoots blinked, leaning against Weave.

“Mhm,” the stallion nodded. “And I think once you’re doing better, you know, get off parole and are allowed to do as you please, that’ll remove Star’s means of lashing out and a target she can hit on. She’ll be stuck being her awful self and seeing where that got her compared to you.”

“I just have a week. Just a week.” Chrys took a breath. “I can do it!”

“I know you can, you’ve gotten this far,” the stallion praised the bugmare.

Chrys grinned shyly.

“Oh no, she’s cute.” Scoots blinked.

“Yup, and more ponies should see her when she’s being cute,” the stallion commented. “By the way, spell’s done.”

“What?” Scoots blinked. “But… Minecraft, and talking…” She waved her hooves at the TV.

“Yeah, just, hold still,” the stallion said, his horn sparking green before a bolt lanced off and hit the pegasus. “Now you’re going to feel some growing pains, but it should-”

“Ugh….” Scoots shivered as her wings started to grow. “Haven’t felt this weird since college.”

“It’ll fix up your wings entirely,” the stallion promised. “You may want a drink to dull the pain.”

“Gimme something hard.” Scoots grunted.

Chrys levitated over a bottle filled with a deep amber liquid. “Well I’ve got a bourbon that I’ve been-”

Scoots snatched the bottle, popped the cork, and pounded a good half of it.

“-saving…” Chrys finished weakly.

“Oh, you’ve got great taste.” Scoots grunted shaking her head roughly. “Good burn.”

“It should stop in roughly a minute,” Weave commented. “After that, your wings should be fixed up to being the same as any other pegasi’s.”

Scoots relaxed with a sigh. “Oh… better…” She sighed, flopping into the stallion’s lap. “How can I thank you?”

“No thanks needed, it’s what I do,” the stallion quipped. “Invent new spells on the fly. Might send that one up to Canterlot Medical, see what they make of it.”

“Sure I can’t thank you in the bedroom?” Scoots smirked.

“Yes, Weave, that sounds like a great idea.” Chrys smiled with a nod.

“But I just got us the books we need for our gear,” the stallion whined.

“Weave, this is a game. We can pause.” Chrys rolled her eyes.

“And you’ve shown that you can multitask.” Scoots blinked her bedroom eyes at the stallion.

“I really don’t see the need for you to thank me for a simple spell in the bed-” Weave started to say.

Scoots nuzzled her face into his lap. “Are you sure?”

“I mean, I don’t know how you can see-” the stallion tried another tactic.

“I see something I like.” Scoots hummed.

“I don’t think she’s gonna be happy until she’s… occupied.” Chrys blushed. “I’ll just pause this and, you two can…. Have some alone time.”

“Seriously,” the stallion rolled his eyes. “Look, I just don’t-”

“Scoots. He’s pretty resistant.” Chrys commented.

“Can’t you hit him with something to, I don’t know, pep him up or something?” Scoots raised a brow.

Chrys looked unsure. Then she looked at Weave. “I mean… Do you want to actually enjoy what Scoots would do to you?”

“I may have become desensitized to sex thanks to you and Star...mostly Star,” the stallion admitted.

“Weave. I’m a changeling. I can fix that, if you want me to.” Chrys tapped him with a hoof.

“I’m just tipsy and horny, don’t take me as pressure.” Scoots rubbed at his thigh with a hoof.

“Mixed messages much?” the stallion snorted.

“Sorry.” She took her hoof away. “But if I’m being honest. I’d love to suck your dick.”

“Maybe not tonight, you did sort of do a few unprofessional things this afternoon,” the stallion commented. “It’d probably take Chrys blasting me before I got it up anyways, and-”

“Sorry.” Chrys’s horn lit up and a beam of green light struck the stallion. “This’ll just balance you out.”

Weave’s whole body shuddered as Scoots could suddenly see something emerging from his sheath.

“Bwah! Reaction was stronger than I thought!” Chrys gasped. “Weave you repress too much.”

“There it is.” Scoots cooed, then got up off of his lap and shifted to step to the floor. She started to trot away. “But if you want me to go-”

Weave’s controller hit the floor as he pounced the mare. A flash of green light later, and his door slammed closed behind the suddenly teleported pair, leaving Chrys alone with the game.

Chrys shuddered. “Just focus on the game, you don’t need it. You don’t need it.” She hunched over and stared at the TV. “Stupid sexy Weave… Happy fuckin’ New Years.”