Lost Soul

I’m quite lucky I’m a light sleeper that tends to wake up early. Or, I guess more accurately, that I don’t sleep well at night and tend to get up earlier than most simply because I don’t want to go back to sleep, but I digress. I could hear Twilight was shuffling around quite a bit up there once morning came. I didn’t know what she was doing, nor was I sure I wanted to know depending on the scenario. I figured I would just pick up a book to read and wait for her to come down if it was important enough. I wasn’t about to risk a trip up the stairs again after the horrible experience I had with it last time.

Once I heard the rustling upstairs stop, I saw Twilight struggling to come down with overfilled saddlebags strapped on her sides, spilling their contents on the stairs with every step she took. There were so many scrolls, parchment and quills that I couldn’t even begin to count them all. It seemed like she was about to collapse due to their weight at any minute. With considerable effort, she finally made it down and just melted onto the ground floor, panting a bit as she tried to catch her breath, I walked over to her, my curiosity at her antics now piqued.

I looked down at her.

“Oh… good… you’re… up…” Twilight managed to wheeze out, her face slamming back down on the ground.

“What’s with the packing?”

“Princess… Canterlot… Gotta come…” She was struggling to get the words out to even try and form a cohesive sentence. It wasn’t working.

“Breathe.”

She took a solid minute to catch her breath, not even bothering to try and pick herself back up off the floor. “The Princess wants to meet with you. You gotta come with me to Canterlot.”

I was wondering when this was going to happen. “Very well.” I took this opportunity to unfasten her saddlebag, pick it up, and sling it over my shoulder. It clearly had some books in there, but it wasn’t that heavy. I guess the old stereotypes about mages always being physically weaker than warriors held true even here. Well, that or I was double her size and could thus carry far more weight than her. Considering ponies are only like 3’ tall max, it was probably the latter.

She gave me a grin and picked herself up now that the weight was lifted from her back. “Thanks.”

I nodded my response as the two of us made it down to the train station to depart. I had asked about the dragon coming along with us, but Twilight sighed as she mentioned something about a note being left for him since she couldn’t get him up. Considering they sleep in the same room and with all the noise she was making upstairs earlier, I was legitimately surprised she managed to not wake up the whole neighborhood, let alone her little brother. Either way, apparently whenever the Princess calls her to do something, she drops everything and goes running to her. With her actions the previous night, I suppose that should have been a level of dedication I would have expected out of Twilight Sparkle, but the act surprised me at the time.

Something I noticed that was quite bizarre about their society is that while I may have gotten stares, no one really seemed to care that a giant who’s double their size is using their public transportation system. I guess that was the advantage of being on a planet with a number of other sapient species other than their own? I asked Twilight about it and she said that the other ponies must just think I’m some variation of minotaur. The fact that minotaurs not only exist here but are also sapient somewhat bothered me. Most of the stories I’d heard about them back home are that they were a cross between a human and a bull, so how did they come about here if there aren’t any humans? Clearly they evolved a different way, but would they still be ape descendants? How many are there? Do they, too, have their own structure of government? These are the sorts of questions I would chase answers for at the library if I still had access to one. Seeing as I was currently on a train, that was, unfortunately, not possible.

The ride up took a little over an hour, I think, and my arrival upon Canterlot- their capital city- was met with a far more hostile response than the one I received from Ponyville. Where before I had just gotten some stares and ponies moved on, the ponies in this town were apparently far more high-strung and willing to sling insults at whatever tickles their fancy. Many of them would openly huff, crane their heads all the way up- ironic, since I think it had the opposite effect from what they intended- and tried to turn away from me. Some would see me, stop, do a double-take, and then immediately bolt in the opposite direction; an action I found to be quite humorous. I even got one to faint right in the middle of the road. My crowning achievement in this town thus far.

It’s unfortunate that my presence here was met with, shall I say... less than optimal results, as I found the city itself to be quite interesting. It was built on an encove near the top of a mountain with some of it being placed almost precariously upon the side, surely a modern marvel of their current engineering standard, with far taller buildings than the ones I saw at Ponyville. It was properly organized, with buildings and establishments being segregated into their appropriate districts. The Royal Palace, even from the outside, seemed to be quite extravagant as well. Honestly, the only thing I really saw that was missing was maps placed at the start and end of every district as landmarks to help allow non-residents find their way around town. It was a place I’d actually like to explore around, had it not been for these snooty reprobates displaying a level of xenophobia I’d expect from some of the worst out of my race. Finding that here over Ponyville was unexpected, as it’d probably be the other way around back home had one of them been in my situation. Bizarre indeed.

Twilight couldn’t help but apologize profusely as she bore witness to the backlash that my coming here caused. I tried to explain to her that I didn’t really care, and- very explicitly- to not apologize on behalf of those that didn’t share her viewpoint. After all, if they don’t represent you as a person- or pony, in this case- then why apologize on their behalf? It was a waste of her time and mine. Also hearing her apologize once every 15 seconds or so was really grating.

Excessive apologizing aside, we finally made it to the entrance of the Royal Palace, a fairly easy feat with all the ponies moving out of our way in disgust. Apparently xenophobia has at least some positive usage. I was thoroughly looked over by the guards standing at the entrance, and once they noticed Twilight next to me, they nodded and allowed us passage. Following her lead, Twilight led me down a series of corridors that not even I could memorize all of at the time. The sheer size and scope of this palace was massive, and the fact that Twilight knew exactly where to head and what corner to turn really showcased just how often she was here. She’s either very close to her mentor, or she’s been here long enough to memorize the place. Maybe both.

Our walking ceased once we made it to these- what I assume to be- extravagant, gold-trimmed doors. The guards didn’t even acknowledge us; they simply opened the door, and once we were inside, immediately closed it again. What I had walked into was a throne room, adorned with a number of stained glass windows depicting what I assume were important events in their nation’s history. Twilight and her friends had two of them. She was apparently far more important than she was letting on.

At the end of the room sat two thrones, one decorated with a sun and the other with a moon. A pony sat at each one, but to my surprise, they were significantly larger than any other I had come across thus far. The one sitting at the sun chair was almost a pure white color with a horn and wings. Her mane was this swirling of soft, tinted greens, blues, and pinks that seemed to sparkle and shimmer when the sun glazed over them just right. The other also had a horn and wings, and was a dark shade of midnight blue, with a portion of her rear end fading into pure black. Her mane was also a pure black splotched with little specks of light that felt like you were gazing into the night sky if you stared at it long enough. Clearly these two were vastly different from all those I had met prior to this.

Twilight had prostrated herself- I think?- on the ground, presumably as some sort of bow or curtsy to the two of them. I simply stood there, Twilight’s bags in one of my hands still slung over my shoulder and the other hand in my hoodie’s pocket. Call us Americans stubborn all you like, but I bow to no leader that I don’t respect, and at this point I had close to no idea what this ruler was like. To say that I was on edge at this meeting would be fitting.

The white one rose from her seat, flaring her wings out as she walked closer to us. She stood about as tall as me, with her horn reaching a couple inches over my head. She stared, silently, as her eyes hovered over me up and down. Eventually she finally settled on my face and spoke for the first time.

“You are Franco Herman, correct?” It wasn’t a question. Her voice was almost monotone, as if she was forcing herself to speak that way. It was a manner of speaking I’d expect from a Princess. Forcibly refined. Commanding. Well spoken. She at least had the demeanor of a leader.

How nerve-wracking. “Correct.” I affirmed, my eyes unwavering off her.

“My student has spoken much about you, yet we still know so little. I’m sure you won’t mind if I ask you some questions?” Once again, not a question.

“I would not have come here of my own accord had I not been expecting some. Go ahead.” I didn’t believe that my affirmation was necessary, considering the tone of her voice, but she waited for it anyway.

She narrowed her eyes at me. “How many wars has your species had?”

Oh. I get the feeling this is going to get ugly. “...Timeframe?”

I could tell she wasn’t happy about the request for clarification, because she let out a worried, “The last hundred years?”

“Of the ones my country fought in?” I tried to do a quick mental note of the recent wars we’ve had. It had been relatively quiet after the last war ended a few years ago, but there was no way I’d have known about all of the ones outside of what my country was a part of. Not like I really needed to, anyway. America’s compulsive need to maintain its status as a dominant superpower led us to waging far more wars than most other countries on the planet. “...I wanna say 10.”

I noticed both Twilight and the dark blue one gave me shocked glances. The white one, too, seemed very unnerved by the revelation I gave them. “...And of the rest of your kind?”

“Don’t know. Never kept track.” This was a partial lie. I knew it was somewhere over 10,000 collectively, but merely speculating it was somewhere that high, and potentially even higher, wouldn’t look good for me no matter how it was spun.

She stepped back a bit as she asked the next question. “And what of the total number your country has participated in?”

She’s really harping on this. I had to give the question more thought than I would’ve liked. “Don’t remember the exact number off the top of my head. Close to 30 sounds about right.”

“How old is your country?”

At least that one is easy. Maybe I can get a question in to clarify something, although I might not like the answer. “276 years. What of your country? How many wars has your kind had?”

I think she was about to ask another question, but stopped for a moment and plastered a neutral expression on her face. “None in the last 400 years.”

Oh. I was wondering why I couldn’t find any records of their recent warfare. They don’t have any. “...I see.” I didn’t know what else to say. In comparison to theirs, my species must’ve seemed like pure savages. I guess that’s actually not an unfair statement to make, all things considered. I was becoming increasingly worried after she said that. My species is far more violent than theirs, and I basically just threatened them with how much more experience we have with warfare by comparison. To say that I accidentally put myself into an unfavorable position would be an extreme understatement.

“How many of these numerous wars have you participated in?”

I was almost afraid to answer truthfully. “One.”

She got really quiet for a minute. Eventually she settled on her next question. Well, I say question, but... “...Give me one good reason I should allow you to stay here.”

I had to force myself to stop panicking internally. I had no idea whether other countries would be as willing to take me into their society as this one was, but at this point all I felt I could do at the time was simply resign myself to this inevitable fate. “...I suppose after a revelation like that, there wouldn’t be one. Deport me, if you must.”

She retracted her wings and turned around to walk back over to her throne. Once she sat down, she spoke once more. “I most certainly do not approve of your species’ obsession with violence, but clearly it seems it can be put to good use if handled correctly.”

How strange. I was certain she would have had me exiled.

“With help from my student, you managed to quell a small population of one of the more dangerous threats to this nation’s small towns, without anypony getting hurt in the process, no less. You have shown adherence to the laws of this land, and even assisted with the translation of a language many of us believed to be dead. I see no reason why you should not be allowed to stay.”

...What? It almost sounds like she-

“In other words,” she concluded, “I believe you are selling yourself short.” She gave a soft smile, the first expression I saw from her that wasn’t forced in some way. “Proper introductions are in order. I am Princess Celestia of Equestria. The one sitting next to me is my sister, Princess Luna.”

“Charmed,” Luna finally spoke up, nodding in my direction.

“I asked my student to bring you here today to confirm a few things about you, our previous conversation being one of them.”

“...And the others?” I finally asked. I wasn’t sure if that was the start of the conversation or not. She really threw me off my game.

“Some safety precautions as well as Equestrian formalities. I am not sure how much of our nation you were able to learn about prior to this, but we would like to administer a G.I. test to you, as well as some medical examinations.”

The medical examinations make sense, but… “‘G.I. test?’”

“‘General Intelligence.’ We feel it helps lost ponies find their purpose if they have their intellectual standards measured and compared to the types of jobs that are around their level. Does your nation do something similar?”

“We have similar tests, but they aren’t used in the same way.”

Celestia nodded in understanding. “We would like to go through the medical examinations first, so please walk with us to the Royal Bastion Hospital. There is an appointment for you already scheduled.”

...So they had no intention of deporting me? Then why did she…?

“You’re coming with us, Princess?” Twilight finally spoke up. I guess she must have been as nervous as I was throughout that bombshell of a first conversation I had with Celestia.

“Of course,” She smiled at her. “I would like to see the results of both the examination and the G.I. test firsthoof, so I shall be joining you. Come, Twilight. We will wait for them outside.”

I’m sure I must have given the same quizzical stare as Twilight as she was ushered out of the room by one of the Princesses. That left only this Luna and I remaining in the large, empty room. She got off her throne and came up to me, much closer than Celestia did.

“We wished to have a word with thee in private, Franco Herman.” The first words Luna spoke to me had the speech pattern I’d expect from an old Shakespearean novel. Even used the royal “we” and everything.

“Very well.”

“You rarely sleep here, and even when you do, it is not for very long. You are plagued by creatures of the night, no?”

How in the hell...? Don’t tell me mind reading is actually possible here. “...What makes you say that?” I figured there was no way she’d be able to physically tell if I was tired, considering the only frame of reference she had to my species was me. I also figured if she could actually read my mind, she’d only be able to tell by delving into it in front of me.

“We hold dominion over the dream realm. It is our duty to watch over the dreams of all who reside in our kingdom. We are more than familiar when somepony is consumed with so much darkness that they cannot sleep. What ails thee, Franco? Why do you refuse to rest?”

So she can’t read my mind, or I guess she can only do so if I’m asleep? Let’s test it. “I don’t. I get all the sleep I need.”

Luna frowned at me. “You must have nerves constructed of the strongest steel if you intend to lie to one of Equestria’s reigning rulers. We know that is not the case, and we shall not drop this matter. It is of grave importance that these nightmares of yours be ripped out at the root.”

What? There shouldn’t be any way for her to know that the amount of sleep I get isnt enough without reading my mind now, right? Her horn didn’t do that glowing thing that Twilight’s does when she uses magic, so I can probably rule that out. I think I need another test. I am curious, though... “Why?”

“We are not sure how it works on your world, but if allowed to fester here, nightmares can prove to be quite dangerous. They attain power by feeding upon the leyline systems of ponies. If left unchecked, they can consume the host’s mind and control their bodies. Should they become strong enough, some can even break out of the dream realm into our reality and wreak serious havoc upon all those that come into contact with it.”

I didn’t even believe what I was hearing. All that damage can be done just by a nightmare? I guess I also had the wrong impression of what her powers do. Maybe she can see what I’m dreaming and when it’s happening? It’s the only explanation I can think of, assuming she isn’t able to tell that I’m lying.

Looking back, I suppose it makes sense that nightmares are dangerous if magic is just an expression of willpower upon reality. Operating under the assumption that this dream realm is an extension of this reality, then it stands to reason that if you subconsciously release enough mana while dreaming, you could perform a spell without meaning to that can now go rampant since you no longer have control over it. Kinda like Silver Chariot Requiem, only potentially way more dangerous.

“...So you’re saying I’m a ticking time bomb?”

“We are not sure what that expression means, but it needs not come to disaster if you allow us to help.”

Great. So my options are let someone I barely know, let alone trust, into the deepest parts of my head, or kill myself. I believe I need to reassess how I feel about this place. “...Perhaps it would have been better had your sister simply exiled me.”

She shook her head. “That would have made things more difficult. Simply leaving the nation does not ensure that your nightmares will not consume you. The further away from us you are, the less our power would be able to help you.”

I guess that explains why they seemingly had no intention of deporting me.

“Why are you so defiant about this issue? Most ponies would beg to have their nightmares taken away to sleep soundly during the night, yet you seem intent on keeping them.”

Because I deserve them. “...I have my reasons.”

She gave me a concerned stare. “...We shall give you some time to cooperate with us upon this issue, but hope that you are willing to share these reasons soon. Nightmares of this intensity and frequency can only stand to damage your psyche in the best case scenario.”

You are far too late for that.

Luna sighed. “We simply ask that you be more open, at least with us. Know that you can trust us. It may be our job, but we do care for your well-being. If not for yourself, at least consider those around you, as they would no doubt be affected by this nightmare you insist upon latching on to.”

It was now slowly starting to click why ponies were so nice with each other. Or, most of them anyway. If having nightmares can result in this outcome, then it makes sense to band together to fight them in a healthy, constructive manner. Fighting them that way would help prevent the problem from ever coming back, for the most part. Getting a thick skin simply wouldn’t cut it, and in some cases would be an active detriment depending on how said thick skin is obtained in the first place. No matter how hard you try, you can’t run from nightmares, so metaphorically standing your ground to fight them is the only option left at that point, right? This is, of course, operating under the assumption that you care enough to not want them to consume you. It’s no wonder they haven’t seen warfare in four centuries.

“I will… make an effort. That’s all I can promise,” I was practically forced to relent.

Luna simply nodded at me. “Come, then. Let us resume with the day’s activities.”

She walked right past me on the way out of the room with me following suit behind her. With this grave news looming over my head, I had no idea what I was going to do going forward.