Shadows of the Night

While Caligo had been on the mend, leaving me to my own thoughts, Somnium had remained silently vigilant over her other half. I’d thought I was fine. It was just like old times before my mind had been occupied by another consciousness, granted it turned to be a symbiotic relationship, but regardless I’d concluded that I was just fine without voices not of my own, in my head. With Caligo’s reawakening, this notion was only solidified with the first words echoing in my skull. The notion was then quickly smashed in with a sledgehammer and swept out the holes in the side of my head. I was overjoyed to have him back and even more so when Somnium started to speak. It should have felt crowded, but it felt more… cozy, like a sort of mental hug. They were technically made to act as a mental support.

‘… Rumor?’ It seemed sort of weird, I wasn’t sure if it was really a good weird or a bad weird. ‘.. Rumor.’ I don’t think it really matters, quite frankly I rather liked it, and that was really all I nee… ‘Master!’

“Huh, what?” I said, out loud, shaken out of my internal monologue.

‘From the information provided from both you and Somnium, it is clear to me you are being used. My suggestion would be to punish them, but, I would not presume to dictate what punishment you may see fit.’

“Whu-what? Punished? Used? That’s ridiculous, they just lost track of me is all, and besides I was able to take care of myself.” At this the bartender was starting to give me some sideways glances at my apparently one sided conversation and began to slowly edge away from the probably crazy biped.

‘By all accounts you were told that you would be given training, such things as tracking and the like, but were instead put at the forefront of a hunt and left to go forward as though a simple attack dog and then left to your own devices despite having clearly explained your own novice skills in such areas. Tell me, did they even critique the fact that you left them on a group hunt over a monster that they believed to be of sufficient danger?’

“Well, no.” I didn’t like the way this conversation was starting to turn.

‘My only intention is ever to give you counsel Rumor. If you doubt my words then I would suggest reconnaissance be done upon the creatures Crash and Burn.’

‘And while we’re out we can get some food for Spinel!’

‘Gyah’, that was a surprising injection. I still wasn’t quite used to a third voice, but despite the random explosion of emotion that was Somnium, she had a point. I couldn’t let my new pet go hungry.

Waving for the bartender’s attention, I ordered some seed cake. Birds eat seeds, and seed cake should have seeds in it, right? Well, it did, and taking a chunk out of the cake I put a small piece in the pocket that held Spinel. She gave a muffled cheep and began to munch away on her supper hungrily.

While the infant cockatrice was busy I turned my attention to Somnium. Now that she was awake, I could finally talk with her again and get some answers out of her.

‘So why exactly wasn’t I able to crush that mountain lion last night? I thought I could harden shadows at will now?’

‘Well duh, it’s not like you’re controlling earth or something,’ was the snarky reply I got from Somnium.

‘What?’

‘Allow me to clarify Rumor,’ Caligo intoned. ‘You see, darkness magic is a type of magic which allows the user to manipulate and control the intangible dark. It has no natural physical form, this is not to say it is powerless on its own, as it is most commonly used for things like silencing and overcoming light, although sunlight itself tends to be unyielding in most instances, and it is particularly easy to shape and hide things with. However, with the advent of both Somnium and I, you can now easily utilize fully realized physical constructs of true darkness within a certain field of use, and without amplification that field is about twenty feet away from you. They can be used to destroy objects, block enemy attacks, and even pick up objects. Something you have some experience with cockatrice I recall. You are also afforded travel over great distances using a network of shadows that span the world.’

Recalling back to before I’d landed in Equestria, some books I had read on the Forgotten Realms series called it the “shadow weave”. It was rather amazing that something like that had a hold here in a land where the norm is literally rainbows and sunshine. I knew Selûne’s sister had something to do with it, but for the life of me I couldn’t remember her name, I swear I wanted to call her Shere, but I just knew that wasn’t quite right. Realizations aside, it seemed that Caligo had gone into something of a lecture mode.

‘and as you know, from previous usage, both the use of the shadow stride and dark travel can only be initiated and ended within dark shadows themselves. The previous of which may only be used for single transportation.’

“Right,” I said, falling back into speaking out loud, giving me another odd look from the barkeep. “But backing up some, what do you mean by true darkness, and why exactly wasn’t I able to squish that mountain lion before it tried to freakin’ eat me?”

‘Ah yes, the lion incident. As I said before darkness is not truly meant to be a physical force, and thus when it is channeled into a physical state, it comes at a cost, more so than the other elements, as even light has an easier time of it by shifting into a primarily particle state. You may have been able to crush the mountain lion, but your mobility would have been put into question.’

“Umm, what?” was my insightful reply.

‘Simply put, Rumor, the more real you make something, purely from darkness, the less you are able to move.’ I swear I could hear a hint of condescension in his deep, echoing, voice. ‘According to Somnium, you had already begun to run, already succumbing to angst. Your own novice skill combined with your increasing fear meant that you only ever impeded your own intentions long before your magical limitations could kick in.’

This was... odd, cause it sort of sounded like the rules for using a guardian type ӒRM, but I suppose that meant I had some sort of grasp on what Caligo was talking about, and it also explained why it had felt so strange to make a full shadow pony back at the castle rather than an empty hard shell. So in a sense it was best for me to make small things anyway, as big things would make it easier for others to get around it to a standing target, like a mountain lion trying to gut me. That brief thought alone made me shiver. But something was still bothering me.

“So could I can make big thing weighty, but what about small weighty things?”

‘Technically, yes, but by then you would be heavily rooted in place, and of course it would also begin to contend with other laws of physics.’

“Whoa, physics? Look I know they have a tenuous grasp in a world where about a third of the population can levitate things with their mind, something that in all reality should require ungodly amount of energy, and your telling me I have limits?”

‘Oh, so you can lift a mountain?’

“Well, can’t I, with this stuff?”

‘I concede that such feat may be possible in the future, but you would require a base of operations and a magical amplifier. Of which then you would have such power, but only within a localized field, but you would still have to deal with the lack of motion that pure physical darkness would entail upon your body. You would then have to contend against darkness resisting such a dramatic change to its nature, rendering any construct made highly unstable, and thus requires years of training.

In all honesty Mast-Rumor, if you find a need to make a weighty object you should infuse something darkness. It has proven best to align with creatures connected to the earth. Combining their own power with ours leads to many wonderful outcomes, like gravity wells for us, and us being able to silence the movements of giant rock or crystal constructs they tend to favor. You are, however, able to make things that are small and durable, like shields edged weaponry and the like without much impairment of speed, though the initial actualization does take away some movement. But once it is made it is made you are able to move more freely.’

Okay, I would definitely need to let that sit for a while. Teaming up with other element wielders, if I ever found one that is, and the things that could entail was starting to sound incredibly fantasy RPGish to me. It wasn’t that it wasn’t cool mind you, it was, but the fact that such a small person like me could generate such titanic powers without the use of things like missiles and giant machines. I was quite glad, all of a sudden, that I was sitting down as my brain began to swim about. But it did nag at me that he hadn’t mentioned the easier way first, though I suppose that it might be a touch harder to find someone who can manipulate earth or any other element may be difficult.

“Just stop me if I got this wrong, but… I can manipulate darkness with ease, and no direct penalty to myself, that is, until I start to harden it into existence, and the weightier they are, the less I can move, yeah?”

‘That is correct. Also, it may be added that you may use either shadows around you, or the more pure material that you leak from your pores.’

Okay, good to know, but my head was still a bit giddy, mostly with the beginnings of all sorts of nerdy ideas, but it began to clear when the raucous laughter of Crash and Burn filtered in through the open door. That’s right, this was my chance. Now I could show Caligo and Somnium just how wrong they were about these guys. Benighting my presence, I silently slid out of my seat, and took a few steps back from the table.

As they walked in I noticed a sizeable bag of money being carried in Crash’s mouth, it’s almost complete lack of clinking a testament to how full it was. They gave look to the place I’d been sitting in when they’d left, and seeing nothing there they made way to the barkeep. They paid for the rooms we’d used the last couple of days, which lay on the second floor, then ordered themselves some drinks.

Once seated in the now empty table I’d previously been in, they began to quickly drain their first drinks, both quaffing two mugs in about four minutes, though Crash was able to take a third. They were obviously in quite good moods. I know I’d be if I had just been paid a handsome sum of money. Indeed nothing out of the ordinary, or to say that either of them had any malicious tendencies towards me. I was even about to tell Caligo off as the brothers called in for another round of drinks for themselves. But I humored him as I cocked an ear to be better listen as Burn turned to Crash and said, “My, quite the fortunate turn of events, ay Brother of mine?”

“Indeed it is dear brother.” Came the foam lipped reply as Crash finished taking a swig. “I still cannot believe we roped in a monster of our own.”

That stopped me cold, but before Caligo could even think anything resembling ‘I told you so’ and even before I could defend a slightly inebriated looking Crash’s rather poor word choice, Burn stepped back in.

“I just can’t believe such a naive sap exist in this world, and yet has all that power. Just a few kind words and we have him wrapped around our hooves dear brother. And after taking him on a few more jobs he’ll be ours completely, and then we can use him against that furry monstrosity that not only threw our cousins in jail, but worse, made fools of us both!”

Burn finished with what was obviously intended to be some sort of intimidating slam of his hoof on the table. And it might have been too, the dark lighting of the room gave him a shadowed, almost haunted look, but, again, my shadow piercing eyes coupled with his already adorable body type meant that ship had long since sailed.

“Indeed brother, I still can’t understand how that little punk rusted my claymore to nothing, and now I have to stick with this dinky little thing.” Crash said as he ran a hoof down the three foot long sword, but he gave a quick chuckle, “but at this rate we’ll be able to send our little cannon on more jobs like this and I’ll be able to get a properly enchanted claymore in two or three more gigs. Heh, and won’t it be something after we sick him on the armor-armed cheat?”

“Even better still, we’ll bring him to Stalliongrad, and let the locals have some fun at him. The little pussy willow will just break under all those stares and jeers,” taking on a high pitch voice, “Oh what a monster!” Then lowering his voice, “Get out of here freak!” Apparently Burn’s “impersonations” were spot on as Crash snorted some foam out of his nose.

They just continued on with their talk, everything that escaped from their lips seeming to be the truth, as far as they were concerned. I just stood there, trying to process it all, my mind churning as darkness began to pour out of me, darkening the local area some, granting a few stares from the scant few patrons who thought they noticed something at our end of the room. They just continued on about just how close the good life was going to be, what sort of story they should make so that I would properly maul this Celt creature, who by even their own twisted account was obviously the innocent, at least in comparison to them, from the encounter, and on just how ugly I really was. In the back of my mind, I couldn’t help but wonder just how the guys back at the castle might have reacted the same way had I not remained hidden the whole time.

That’s when it happened, amidst all of my confusion at how someone could take my help and twist it into such a perverted purpose, how something this deviant could have sprung up in Equestria under the gaze of the kind Celestia, and my own personal vortex of self-loathing battling against all that would still try to treat these particular ponies with even a modicum of decency, a lone thought, not of my own, broke through.

‘I did tell you, Master.’

That was right, master, I was the one who inherited the white mask. I was to be the dark sovereign, and I who was now, for once in my life, the one with the power.

The room began to turn pitch as my hold on my emotions grew more tenuous.

Flashes of thought and emotion arced through my mind. It would be so simple to squeeze the life from them. String the two betrayers out on darkened chains and let them feel the world crushing in around them. Their eyes bulge at their realization of failure and internal fracturing. Their howls of pain, music, until lungs collapsed.

I was too wrapped up in myself to notice the scant two other patrons and barkeep, let alone the two pegasi brothers in front of me look about in confusion. The growing call to follow herd instinct, to run from the dark, began to call at them stronger as the light from the small lamps began to be smothered in dark preventing their glow from reaching any eye, and the sunlight coming in from the small swinging doors began to slowly dim away from the increasing layers of darkness in front of it.

‘Perhaps more energy than even they deserve for you to expend on them, even as a punishment, but, fitting, Rumor.’

My first instinct was to reach for glee. Someone was finally agreeing to my thoughts on punishing wretched scum. Black and fluid emotions began coursing out the well where I kept such petty things like emotions.

No sorrow or self loathing this time to douse my growing discontent, no thoughts to meter my judgment with such petty things as introspection or foresight. Only the anger of a child made fun of for not throwing a punch back at a bully in middle school, aware of how he'd be seen in the same light as the organic waste attacking him for the simple act of defending himself.

All the bullies and jerks in the world no longer able to propagate. No longer be able to pollute my world with their filthy existence. It was so amazingly simple, and it would all start with the two, filthy, hideous, creatures before me.

A thin smile began to crack against the strained muscles in my face. Somewhere in the background screams of some sort were beginning to sprout up, but none of those mattered, only the screams of my two little buddies in front of me mattered now as two dark chains winded around their limbs. Lifting them up, the chains wrapping around a ceiling support beam, it encircled their midsections preventing them from flying away.

Pushing thought into reality I gave way and gave silent command for the chains to move. I felt myself beginning to root to the spot, as more strength was poured into the chains, making them heavier, and thicker. It was so close now, I could see them shivering. It was delicious. Their fear seemed almost a palpable thing twisting in the air above them.

Playing along to no one, but myself, no creature besides myself would being able to see through the midnight darkness that now wholly filled the small floor, I shot out a pale shadow from my mouth, slowly licking at the air in mock attempt at tasting their fear.

It was so simple, efface these fools, put them out of their misery, and make the world a better place all in one go.

I again gave call to the dark and the chains tightened again, stifling the two pegasis’ screams as another tug now made a small crackling sound across the tops of their backs. They continued to squirm so their spines were still in working condition, though the rushing blood in my ears made it hard to judge just how loud the cracks may have been.

Invisible to all, the darkness in the tavern room began to swirl, I could feel the air get colder as the darkness engulfed the last sliver of light. Finally, yes, finally all of the pathetic fools who would rather waste their energy to corrupt the intent of all those who would only ever do good would finally pay. No longer would it be the meek will inherit the world. No eventualities! It would be theirs NOW, and it would all begin with these two cretins.

My once smile became a hard pressed, razor thin, line. The rest of my face was bunched into a throbbing mass of hate and a dark fury at a life of bottled emotions finally being let out. It honestly felt like a cracking dam. My own ribs began to buckle and a salty taste began to annoyingly bubble up into my mouth.

A small giggle escaped from my mouth. I couldn’t help it. It was just so wonderful. Just a few more beautiful inches, their pathetic attempts to scream falling upon deaf ears at the gale of laughter that now came gushing out of me. I began to feel the blood rush to my head from the adrenaline. Their pain would be exquisite.

‘Stop…’ I ignored the voice that tried to get at me. Somepony was obviously trying to beg for these two fools’ lives, I resisted and re focused my anger on my prey. Just a few. More. Inches.

‘Please stop.’

“Gaaah!” I yell turning around, searching for the voice who had to protest to their well deserved fate. “Where are you?!” I stopped the shadow chains in mid squeeze.

'Why must you kill them?'

Again I swept the room, growing more infuriated that my own eyes couldn’t spot where the voice’s owner was, but I gave a reply, “You want to know why? FINE! It’s because they, hurt…me.” That brought me short. It sounded so… petulant, so childlike, when I said it out loud like that. I mean, surely it was the right thing to do… to…

I looked at the malingering, twisted, links of faux shadow metal that rustled silently upon one another. I looked at the two pegasi brothers who, for all intents and purposes, had really only been rude to me. Here I was, some ridiculous… idiot of a nerd, given super powers, and the first people to merely slight me were met with such an obscene force. Through the dark their faces were masks of abject terror and pain. Their fear was so real and yet even in the darkness both Crash and Burn were still almost looking directly at each other, guided by some sort of invisible bond.

Silently, I let the darkness fall away as the dim light flooded back into the room, blinding from the midnight pitch that had occupied it not seconds before. Crash and Burn fell down with a small thump, too surprised to catch themselves with their wings, but more likely having a few of their more delicate bones in their wings broken.

I started to back away, a creeping sense of awe and disgust began to permeate through me at the realizing of the abominable act I’d almost committed.

I had to say, something.

But, nothing came out. My strained voice wasn’t helping matters, but I just couldn’t, wouldn't, say sorry. I could feel the stares starting to build from behind me as my soothing shadows wrapped around me, removing me from the room.

It dawned on me that it had been Somnium, previously the evil entity Nightmare Moon, who had been my conscience during that, disgusting fiasco. But they still betrayed me.

This is what I get when I let myself think others would really want to be around me. Worse, even after all the times, ALL more microscopically minor than what had just happened, I still had a disgusting lump of belief that people were really good deep down despite what all the logic of the world always seemed to dictate otherwise.

Before I could continue that train of thought, and before either Caligo or Somnium could begin to say anything themselves through the torrent of thought and emotions that blazed in my head, the shadows receded and I found myself in the empty chamber, with a lone pedestal in the center, that I’d found Caligo, or more pointedly, the mask he resides in.

I was at a loss, a small thought at why I’d even come here tried to bubble up past my still increasing torrent of emotions, that had only been momentarily held back from just utter shame at what I’d almost done, even if they had possibly deserved it, but my growing frustration was weakening any thoughts I tried to grab hold of. Just “chin up and man up” what else could I do?

I threw off my hood, I just couldn’t stand having to hide myself in privacy, allowing my feet to lead me, I stalked out of the room, back hunched like a vulture. Gliding my way up the, nearby, stairway I just couldn’t get it out of my head how freaking pathetic I was. My face was flushed, my nose had begun to run, and despite myself the frustrations of my day made me give into what I’d knew  was one of the most selfish things to do for myself, I cried. I tried to stop, but once it had started it just couldn’t stop.

Why was I so pathetic?

Why was I always, always, always so fucking pathetic?!!!?

I crested the stairway and was greeted with the site of a, slightly, web encrusted hallway. Even though much of the ancient castle was in a state of disrepair, much of the lower structures remained untouched, their beauty unmarred by time. What particularly caught my eye were the ponies carved into the surrounding walls. Not that it mattered what species they were, what mattered was their eyes. Always the eyes! Always judging! So many goddamned stares!

I. Hated. It.

Eyes that would be hidden, masked by sycophantic smiles and false words, but they were there, subtly staring into my very existence, always casting out the freak to fend for themselves.

The emotions that threatened to end my balance of my mind took note of the nearest ornate carving. It was a whirlwind of ponies smiling and cavorting about in a spiral, probably an updraft of some kind, carved into an ornate column, flaunting their happiness in front of me. A thin shadow burst from the swarm that burned around me, cutting a thin, perfect line down the center of it, marring nearly half of all their disgustingly happy faces.

I paused, looking at the unintentional wrecking, as small sliver of dark began to take shape and anchor itself upon my right index finger. And then another one began to form on my middle finger, then my ring finger, and my pinkie finger, and was then mirrored on my left hand. Each one grew to a length of about one foot, a thin and wicked edge running along the bottom of each, and ending in an even more wicked point.

I began to walk, my arms felt a bit leaden but a call to the dark helped push them along to the first stone picture as I was propelled into a sprint by the third step. As I spread my arms to my side I slashed them across the stone leaving eight gashes that obscured the carvings entirely. I jumped the scant few feet to the next section, and the next one, and the next one. One single thought continuously repeating through my, once again, churning mind, ‘Quit mocking me!’

My chest burned, but all that mattered was stopping all the eyes from looking at me in my moment of emotional weakness. I hated myself for being so petty, so stupid, but I hated their happiness more. Dust began to fill the air, revealing a few more invisible spider threads that were soon equally demolished.

Finishing the wall in front of me, I turned, and saw another wall of judging quadruped freaks. I began to start on the next half; my frenzied slashes grow more erratic, when I felt something scrape against my chest. ‘Dammit!’ I thought. I must have cut some of my cloak this time, but an actual show of unintended physical self injury only spurred me on to a greater speed to stop them all from looking at me.

I couldn’t stand it. They were all so ignorantly happy. Every one of those fucking, goddamn, four legged freaks. Flying, swooping, and lounging on clouds just to gawk at everyone below.

I could feel myself leaving. I couldn’t stem the tide from the well where I kept all my other emotions, all selfish, but my hold grew more tenuous. I didn’t care. My eyes stung from my tears, but the grotesque smile on my face belittled whatever the tears might mean. Again, a salty twang began growing in the back of my mouth, but I’d finally stopped all the stares. I was alone. But through the blood rushing through my ears a distorted sound made me turn. Halfway up the hall was some small, living, creature. My muddled thoughts again turned to rage that some sentient creature was now looking. Flashes of things like Angel Bunny and other small animals that had demonstrated thought, like so many birds at Canterlot, assaulted me.

My arms began to stiffen more as I focused my thoughts into growing the claws into proper shadow gauntlets, bigger, heavier. A thin feeling of nothingness began to travel down my spine, but it didn’t matter as my, now forced, calm gait belittled every single horrifying thought that crossed my mind. The thing just stood there, dust settling upon it, as A few shadow strides brought me directly behind it.

I raised my now two fully armored arms above my head, the gauntlets dissipating, as I clasped my hands together. Calling, more, at the shadows along the unlit, and now dust filled, hall, a small ball began to grow around them as small spikes began to stud the outside. My arms were now almost completely useless, and the strain to hold them up was now almost completely controlled by my shadow control, as I send the mass of shadows down with a swing, intending to send the thing flying off like a golf ball.

‘No!’

It hadn’t been enough to stop the blow, but it had been enough for me to jolt it out of the way some, if for nothing more than the surprise of again hearing Somnium. It was also enough for me to finally take note that the now quite damaged creature was a small cockatrice lying, crumpled, not a third of the distance I’d tried to send it down the hallway.

Worry began crawl up my chest like an itching swarm of ants, clutching around my heart, as I rushed over to her side.

“No no no no no” I whispered as I ran, forgetting to use the shadows, thus making the small trip extend even further into eternity.

I lifted my left hand to the pocket that was supposed to be holding Spinel, maybe this was another... small co... I didn’t finish the thought, I couldn’t, as my hand grasped on nothing. The pocket was empty. I checked my other pockets in a desperate attempt to hope against the dawning inevitable.

“no no no No NO!”

The thing below me, as I fell to my knees, was, now, unavoidably and truly Spinel gave a small cheep. I could see a few bits of blood began to trickle down a few of her scales where two of the points had connected fully. Her chest was still moving, and I knew that I had to get her help. I tried to slide my hands under her, but she only gave a piercing screech of pain. So I tried to call out to the dark and had it cup around her form, leaving her completely still.

“Shhh, it’s okay, I’m going to get you help.” I whispered, in what I’d hoped was a reassuring manner. Spinel simply cheeped weakly as I brought her in closer trying to, uselessly, absorb the pain by some half-thought of osmosis.

I didn’t know what to do, cradling her near my heart I cried softly as her pulse slowly grew slower and slower, looking over her small dying body, she nestled herself closer into my chest as if to forgive me for what I'd done to her in my vicious rage.

After what felt like an hour, the beats faded into almost nothing, fearing the inevitable I raised her closer to my ear as my tears started to fall faster than before. “I’m sorry.” I whispered as the only friend that had accepted me for who I was, left this world.

My chest began to heave, this time so forcefully that I almost believed that I could half hear it creaking; I pulled her body to closer to me. I stayed there, eyes closed. The gauged and marred stone work where faces had once been no longer mocking, but simply reminder that I was alone.

‘Why?!?’