Obsessed and sociopath

"You are cursed!" shouted bum at Randal. He turned to him and said:

"Easy, easy. I didn't forget about you, bastard. Just let me choose what I will do: kick in you in the balls or just throw something into you."

"What's up boy? Missed you too."

"I don't." Randal approached the group and said:

"As I noticed, you found new victims for your yells."

"Which yells?" asked Pinkie.

"Well, once upon, he was whispering to me that I was cursed the whole night."

"Oh, did you hear about earplugs?"

"Nah, I didn't have them and I wasn't thinking clearly because I was drunk."

"Alright, now can I ask you? Who are you?" asked Twilight.

"Randal. The person who will beat one bum's face." Twilight turned to bum and asked:

"How did you send him in Equestria?"

"Well, I have enough power to open the portal. I was hoping he will be eaten by wolves."

"Sorry for disappointing you. BTW, what day is it today?" asked Randal. Pinkie looked at her watches and said:

"Monday. 14 p.m."

"Thanks, Pinkie." Everyone looked at him with a questionable look and he asked:

"What?"

"How do you know my name?"

"I read it in Twilight's diary."

"Wait, you stole other me's diary?"

"Nope. Just took some photos, but I think it could be useful." Randal noticed that Fluttershy was blushing and looking at something. Randal turned around and saw that Lyra was touching her breast. Randal was dumbfounded and he said:

"Um, Lyra. I don't mind the free striptease, but can you not do that? At least on the public?" Lyra looked at him and said:

"Okay, but I don't understand what are these things for?"

"I would explain to you this with pleasure, but I had a '3' mark on human anatomy."

"No worries, I will explain it to you." With those words, both girls stepped aside and Pinkie began telling her about woman chest, while Randal turned to bum and asked:

"BTW, how did you get in here?"

"So many questions and so many answers? Some of them can disappoint you, while others can make you happy."

"Ugh. Again your second-hand philosophy."

"I created it by myself and I am just trying to be smart."

"Well, mission failed, pal. But you didn't answer my question."

"The distance from here to your house is about 6 km. One and a half hours of walking."

"Great. No need for taking a taxi. Oh, and also.." Randal approached bum and punched him into his stupid face. The old man fell to the ground and began rubbing a sore spot, while Randal said:

"I always wanted to do that. Okay, goodbye. Hope to not see you again."

"We will meet again."

"Can't wait." With those words, Randal began walking away, but suddenly he was stopped by someone's arm. He turned around and saw Lyra.

"Wait, you will just live me there?"

"Yup. All I want is to get to my bed and sleep for 1000 hours."

"Can I go with you, please?" Randal looked at Lyra with raised eyebrow.

"What? No."

"Please."

"No."

"Please." Lyra made puppy eyes and Randal moaned in defeat.

"Okay, okay. You can go with me."

"Yay!" With those words, Lyra hugged Randal, so his face was on her breast. Girls, who were watching them, slightly blushed. Lyra released Randal and he said:

"Wow, if I will die, I will prefer this way."

"What?"

"Nah, I am not to you. I am to those guys from the 4th wall."

"From what wall?"

"Nevermind, just let's go already." With those words, both headed to Randal's apartment leaving Main 7.

"Um, should we worry about it?" asked Rarity pointing to the pair.

"Nah, no need to worry. They will be fine," said bum getting up on his legs. Meanwhile, Randal and Lyra were walking in the streets and suddenly Randal asked:

"So, did Pinkie explain to you for what are boobs for?" Lyra blushed and said:

"Umm, I don't want to talk about it. Okay?"

"Okay." Soon both were in Randal's town. Lyra began looking around and saw that building was gray and dim, while people were looking indifferent and apathetic.

"Do people there are looking like this?" asked Lyra pointing to citizens.

"Yup, typical town. And here we are." Lyra turned her head and saw Randal's apartment. It was no different from other buildings. Gray walls, dirty windows, a stinky alley with garbage. Both entered the building and went up to the second floor. Randal pulled out keys and opened the door. When Lyra entered the flat, she was met by the terrible smell of something rotten. Soon she found the source of the smell. It was boxes of pizza with rotten pepperoni.

"Oh, sweet Celestia! What the hell is that?" asked Lyra pointing to boxes. Randal looked at them and said:

"Oh, it's just rotten pizzas. They are here for like 1 year."

"Ugh! I don't want to live in the dump." With those words, Lyra opened the window and threw all boxes outside. When she turned around, she heard the sounds of a traffic accident. Randal peeked out from the window and saw many cars that bumped into each other.

"Wow, hadn't seen such destruction caused by simple pizza before." Randal closed the window and wanted to go to his room, but he suddenly realized something.

"Wait, what? Are you gonna stay here!?" shouted Randal at Lyra. She rubbed her ears and answered:

"Um, yeah. I just want to know about the human world more. When I was a filly, I was always bullied by believing in humans. I hope you don't mind." Randal wanted to say something, but looked at Lyra's body and sighed:

"You're lucky that you have a sexy body." Lyra yelped in enjoyment and hugged Randal again.

"Thank you!" Randal tried to say something, but Lyra heard only mumble.

"Oops, sorry." She released Randal, who began breathing heavily.

"Okay, but we need some rules and the first rule - no hugs. Understand?" Lyra nodded and headed to Randal's room, while he sat on the couch and began thinking about his situation:

'Ugh, now I need to live with a girl from a different dimension and who has a hot body. Something is strange by the way. I always was enjoying the company with sexy girls, but why the hell am I feeling uncomfortable near her? Maybe, I just know her true form or-" His thought was cut off because of Lyra's words:

"What's inside?" Randal turned around and saw that Lyra was in front of...Mortimer's room. His eyes widened and he got up from the couch and said:

"Wait! Don't open the door!"