Author's Note

Just doing so general cleaning up, getting ride of some [/hr]s and such. Decided to color Celestia and Luna's words in Orange (not Applejack Orange though) and Blue (Not Rainbow Dash Blue) for the sisters.

5: Aftermath

<<>>

From everything Twilight had gathered about Steel everypony seemed to think he’s a perfectly friendly if frustrated eccentric. Though when Steel whispered to her that he’d distract Nightmare Moon she was expecting anything… but that.

Eccentric? The stallion is bloody insane!! And she’s pretty sure even the crassest of mares all liquored up would never be that hideously bold and shameless!

He bucking COCKSLAPPED Nightmare Bucking Moon for Celestia’s sake!!

“STEEL!” Regardless of his very questionable mental health he still risked his life to buy them time.

That snapped the others out of their dumbfounded daze and they all galloped to the downed giant. He was laying spread eagle and everything was in plain view. Fluttershy gasped, Rarity made an appreciative hum, and Applejack just looked dumbfounded.

“Holy horseapples…” Dash cursed, “That’s not a dick… that’s a damn battering ram…”

Twilight… really didn’t want to know what Pinkie was thinking. Instead she focused on Steel, his eyes were open but blinking out of sync and looked dazed. And amazingly enough his jaw looked like it had healed as well, possibly due to the overflowing harmonic energies?

It was a common enough phenomena, but she had never heard of it happening so quickly or smoothly.

“Steel? Can you hear me?” Twilight asked as she stabilized his head.

He blinked owlishly before he… tried to look at Twilight. His eyes focusing two inches above her head to the right by three inches.

“I HAVE TASTED THE RAINBOW AND IT TASTED LIKE BRAZZLEBERRY!”

“Oh! I’ve had those! I still like snozberries better though.” Pinkie replied.

"Oh my.” Twilight snapped up and looked to see Princess Celestia with a alicorn filly sort of hiding behind her

“Princess Celestia!?” There was a quick rush to bow from all the mares to the Solar Monarch, bar a still dazed Steel.

Though honestly Twilight personally doubted he’d bow even if he could, he struck her as the “buck tradition” sort of stallion. Honestly she felt sorry for any mare (or stallion if he swung that way) that herded with him.

“Please Twilight don’t bow.” Celestia said with a motherly smile though she kept an eye on the still prone Steel, “You and your friends have done me a service and reunited me with my sister. If anything I should be bowing to you for what you and your friends did.”

Before Twilight could start protesting there was a moan and Steel rolled over.

“Fuck me running… why did I think holding Moonie for a Rainbow Laser facial was a good idea?” Twilight looked like she was ready to either strangle the stallion or faint, “And why does everything taste like brazzleberries? The fuck are brazzleberries anyway??”

“They’re fruits native to the Dreamlands and are exotic treats.” A filly-sized Luna answered, “Don’t Dreamwalkers still import exotic foods Tia?”

“No, after your,,,” Tia just looked pained before continuing, “The Dreamlands became too dangerous for Dreamwalkers. And over the centuries the teaching eventually was forgotten. There hasn’t been a Dreamwalker for three hundred years now.”

Luna looked horrified for some reason but Twilight figured she’d be upset if she were in her place. To know your domain has become so dangerous would upset anypony.

Steel just grunted again before he managed to push himself up stretching, which filled the air with various bones popping like a firecracker. He twisted his neck side-to-side getting another loud crack followed by a relieved sigh.

“So… sup Sunbutt?” Steel drawled.

Twilight’s eye twitched and her ears started flicking erratically while her new friends slowly backed away.

<<>>

[FrIeNdShIp!]

“That… isn’t good I think…”

“Sunbutt?” Celestia snorted, “Haven’t heard that one since my sister and I were foals.”

Luna was just giggling, though despite her amusement I could clearly see she was looking at me with interest that wasn’t connected to what I called Celestia. Glancing over I saw Rarity (the minx) looking amused, Rainbow (the damn cocktease) laughing, and Applejack (cowpony pinup mare) was covering her face with her hat, and Fluttershy (smole adorable potential sexkitten) just looked… like she honestly didn’t know what to do.

“Well they are very eyecatching and if anypony says you need to loose weight they’re either gay or dead.” I said with a cheeky grin, “I certainly wouldn’t mind motorboating dem cheeks!~” Oh that got a blush!

Ha!

And that made Fluttershy faint and Rarity roll her eyes.

“Steel darling, please restrain your crudeness. For Fluttershy if nopony else.” She said with a quirked brow.

“Only because you make clothes that make me look sexy.” Steel retorted with a cheeky grin.

“As interesting as this is perhaps we should go somewhere else to talk?” Celestia suggested raising a brow in amusement, “And if you restrain your crass behavior Mr. Steel I just might allow you to kiss my flank.” She added with a smirk.

Twilight looked like she was about to have a stroke at Celestia's words while Luna just rolled her eyes. The others looked shocked as well. I, however, must’ve looked very interested in her offer. Seriously if she got me to bust a nut in a way that doesn’t involve a tail, magic, hoof, wing, or oral I’ll eat her goddamn ass out!

My balls throbbing angrily at the tease and it was only bullheaded stubbornness that stopped my boner from returning from the dead!

“So, how are we getting out of here?” I asked, “I really don’t want to go through the forest again. And if that Steve hits on me again I might get a little violent.”

Celestia just rolled her eyes before there was a bright flash.

I shook my head and looked around, “Library huh? Fair enough. Wonder if Pinkie has any more punch left. I’m thirsty as hell.”

“You’re not the only one.../You’re not the only one…” I’m pretty sure Celestia and Luna muttered that as they watched me.

“Here you go Steely!~” You know, I’m not even going to question it.

Taking the glass I gave her a quick nuzzle before I slugged it down like it was a shot of liquor.

“You know partner that’ve been more impressive if that was some of Berry’s Brew.” Applejack said dryly.

“I know. Don’t care. Spent thirty minutes fighting a hyper-aggressive virgin.” Oh that got a snort from Celestia and a cackle from Luna.

The others either sputtered (Twilight and Rarity) or guffaws (Rainbow, Pinkie, and Applejack). Fluttershy was still out cold and laying on the couch. I looked over and Luna was laughing so hard tears were in her eyes! Was it really that funny?

“Sister. You know technically that makes you a virgin as well.” Celestia said dryly.

“I know.” Luna wiped her eyes, “But by no fault of my own. You just kept grabbing the ones I was interested in. However living vicariously through Wet dreams kept me satisfied and stopped me from hating my insatiable sister.”

“I wasn’t that bad.” Celestia said with a huff, “You’re problem is that everypony you were interested thought you were too out of their league.”

“Like you were any better!?” Luna retorted hotly.

“Well, I am more approachable.” Celestia replied tilting her head, “After all you are “The Night” not to mention a Warrior Goddess in your own right.”

“... Sunny Harlot!”

“Petite Shortstack!”

“Glutton!”

“Voyeur!”

“Molestia!”

“That was only one time! You swore you would never bring that up again!?” A flustered Celestia exclaimed, “You, Eternal Virgin!!”

I… just took a seat beside the girls and watched this fascinating back and forth between sisters. I could clearly see no matter how deeply their remarks cut they still loved each other deeply, though that Molestia comment made me curious about how deeply their love was.

“Peanut Butter bits?” Pinkie offered.

“Sure.” I said taking a hoofful of what clearly were Reese Pieces and popping them in my mouth.

“So… how’s that Welcome party coming, Pinks?” I asked curiously.

“You’re a pain in the flank.” She replied bluntly, “Nopony has ever given me such a hard time. But you’re alright for an extra-dimensional alien.”

I just looked at her before shaking it off.

“Just… don’t question it.”

[Agreement]

“Oh! You’re back! Feeling okay there?”

[Affirmative]
[Curious]
[Query]

“Well we got hit and possibly fried by a Rainbow Laser of Friendship. Pure Harmonic energy.”

[Contemplation]

“Well you have fun bud. Just tell me if I’m about to start shitting out rainbows or something.”

[Snort]
[Amusement]

Eventually everypony left to make arrangements for some transportation back to Canterlot (Celestia), their respective homes (Rainbow, Pinkie, Applejack, and Fluttershy) though not before Rainbow told me how “Metal” I was for getting into a hooffight with Nightmare Moon, and a Inn (Twilight and Spike) leaving me and a very smole Luna alone.

“I want to thank you Steel.” Luna said with a faint smile, “I’m not sure if the Elements would’ve worked without you distracting my Nightmare.”

“No problem. And err… sorry for the whole cockslapping thing. To be honest it seemed like a good idea.” She must never know about the bucket list, “And what do you mean by “My Nightmare” exactly?”

Luna just snorted in amusement.

“Steel, in the past I’ve been called a Dream goddess. And I pretty much admitted to living vicariously through sex dreams. Trust me a cockslap is positively tame in comparison to some of the dreams I’ve experienced.” She said wiggling her brows, “And well… maybe I’ll tell you some day. Perhaps over a drink.”

“Are you asking me out Princess?” I said with mock-awe, “I’ll have you know if you plan on getting me drunk before you take advantage of me you really don’t have to work that hard. I’m pretty easy honestly.”

“O-Oh?” Luna asked, flustered by my words.

“Yeah. You have no idea how bucking frustrating it is to be surrounded by mares and none are willing to bang!” I growled in frustration, “Seriously. Six months. The most I get are either hoofjobs, blowjobs, magicjobs, wingjobs, and there was that one time a mare hoofed my prostate. But everypony sees my hardon, they nope the buck out of the thought of me sticking it in!”

“Ooohhh that does sound unpleasant.” Luna said, “And I do understand to a degree.” She added with a thoughtful look on her face.

I just smiled at finally having somepony that actually understood my frustration.

And from their conversation just flowed from topic to topic, mostly me updating her on modern-day Equestraia. Needless to say, some topics left her very irritated and upset.

“On one hoof Nightmare Night mocks my Nightmare savagely, but on the other… it sounds fun.” Luna said, “I find myself at a loss at how to feel.”

“I think you should just accept it.” I answered, “Nightmare night’s been a thing for centuries. Trying to change it would be an exercise in futility. Besides who says you can’t have fun with it? I myself already have a costume designed! Rares has been helping me with it.”

“Oh? Actually how do you know Generosity?” Luna asked curiously.

“Can you at least use their names?” I asked, “But she’s asked me to model for her as she’s never worked on anypony my size before. And I indulge her when she feels like playing dress up. She also pointed me to Sweet Apple Acres when I first came to town. We’re pretty good friends, and I’m lucky to have such a generous not to mention an attractive friend.”

“Oh? So is she in a herd with you? Proves she’s not as foolish as everypony else in this town at least.” Luna said dryly.

“No, we just hang out. I think it’s the emotional connection she craves more than physical intimacy. Personally though I think she’s testing me. She’s sort of picky.” I answered, “And I should hope not. Granted I haven’t told her about my unique magic but I’d hope she would dismiss it instantly.”

“Unique magic?” Luna asked with some interest.

“Yeah. But… a stallion needs to keep a few secrets.” I said with a smirk, “Though given how cute you are I imagine you’re breathtaking when you’re back to normal. So you can wait until then to pry my secrets out of me.” I added giving her a nuzzle.

Luna’s coat turned red and I was amused. So experienced yet not, god I’m going to enjoy making her blush as much as I can!

“Y-You!!” Luna just punched me in the shoulder making me laugh.