The Badlie Writne and Speld Adenturs of Deepy Hewvsby FallingTeapotsChaptersChapter Wun - Da manoovering mofinChapter Two - Twilight's InterruptionChapter Tree - Da epik mofin chaisChapter Four - Rainbow's Words (of Awesomeness)Chapter Faiv - Da mofin of nomminessChapter Six - Fluttershy's PraiseChapter Shevn - Da mofinChapter Eight - Rarity's ConfusionChapter Nien - Da final mofin [TRAGEDY]Chapter Wun - Da manoovering mofinHello, before you start reading, read THIS.The spelling is my attempt at, well, spelling like Derpy Hooves. You know she's a derp, so of COURSE she's going to spell godawful. What I'm trying to do here is think of daily situations for the Derpster and recreate them into words, and continue on to make it incredibly bland. The tragedy tag is there for a reason, but nothing happens to our little Derp. I promise. You'll see if you continue reading this terrible story! If you get headaches easily, I suggest you don't read. It gave me a bit of one after reading it, my spelling was SO bad! Keep in mind that this is my try at making a trollfic. I hope you like it. im sittin on da couc watchin televiosn wen i get an ideea. i wanna mofin i thik. i get up an wak to da refridgerdator an ders da mofin. i trie getign it but it slideds awy frm mah hewv an went in da freeza. i opend da freeza an i trie getign it agen. but it flewe out da freza an on tawp o da televiosne an turnd purpal. i finaly gaave up nad went to slep. MUFFIN Chapter Two - Twilight's InterruptionHello. It's me, Twilight Sparkle, student of Princess Celestia. It has come to my attention that Derpy has started writing a story, calling it "The Badlie Writne and Speld Adenturs of Deepy Hewvs". I think it is fucking ridiculous and needs to stop immediately a good chance for her to use her imagination and write. Unfortunately, she is a pretty awful speller and writer. I'm not going to get her to stop, but I suggest you quit reading. I have read over her tale and it is pretty.. what's the word.. retarded. Uh oh, here comes Derpy. I'll talk to you later! Chapter Tree - Da epik mofin chaisLEGEND Purple - Derpy Pink - Muffin -- when i wake up i se da mofin on teh flor. i galop aftr it an it keeps movin. i go out da dor and kep chaisin it. it strts flyin an i liek start flyin to. an den were at the sugr cube curner an da mofin tals to me. it sayz: deepy hewvs ur so dum omg liek y ar ur cutie mrk like a bunc of dum bubblz. i meen dats so dum. u r rly dum. y r u so dum depy hewvs i meen liek u dont evn brake da foorth wal liek i do. com and chais after me u bitch idiot. an dan i say y r u so meen cuz im a sexy mofin but y r u a sexy mofin!1!!!!!one!!!11!!!!!1 cuz i am y r umad???????!!1 cuz ur a sexy mofin an im not a sexy mofin i wana be a sexy mofin to!!!!eleven!!1!1!!11!1!!onehundredandeleven!!11 no and he flyin awai an im liek o no u dont u dum sexy mofin and den i flie aftr him an ya. de end 4 now stay tund for da nxt chaptr. Chapter Four - Rainbow's Words (of Awesomeness)Okay, Derpy is cool and all but her story SUCKS LIKE SHIT. Even Scootaloo can write something. SCOOTALOO. IS. A. BETTER. FUCKING. WRITER. THAN. A. FULL. GROWN. MARE.. Dude, that's sad. That's really sad. I mean, I know I'm the best at everything, but dude, a filly, better than a mare, at writing. I mean I know nopony's good at everything but.. ... RAENBO DASH WAT R U DOIN!! Oh, not again.. Sorry, that's Derp calling me. Better go, and don't tell anyone what I just said, alright?? Chapter Faiv - Da mofin of nomminessLEGEND Purple - Derpy Cyan - Zecora Pink - Muffin -- so da mofin had gotn two da evafre forst. i chaiesd it an managd to go met zecoa. she sed dat i shuld eat it wit peneut butr aftr i get it. an i said ok. but before i leave zeoca says wait take dis jaar o peenut butr an eat it in dis fursest an i say ok zeoca but is it god wit jely to? no only penut butr r u sur ya now go an get dat mofin an maik sur to com back an gimme sum to plz. i wil giv u a mofin to. ok bi bi i c da mofin at a tree an da tre loks skary. i laff at it liek ponkie pi todl me. an da tree smild at me an explodd. ok an da mofin talkd to me an it said omg lev me alon u stupid hors an i sed omg no ur a sexzy mofin so no i wanna eat u catch u an brin u bak to da refrigerderator so u will be saif an den i can hangge out wit u an we cn be frends u no cuz frendshtip is magik ok omg ok fin ill come wit u but u hav to kis me firshrst ok an den i ckissd him on da mofin lipsp. an den he sed ok lets go i prmomsi ill com ok lets go plz lik cuz now omg im a sexy mofin k plz an den i sed ok Chapter Six - Fluttershy's PraiseUm.. Hello.. I'm Fluttershy.. I just read Derpy's story here. I really like it.. Nobody seems to believe me though.. Really, I promise, I love it... Um.. So have you seen the new movie, Ma- Oh.. Um.. Sorry.. I forgot what we were talking about. I really like Derpy's story.. .... .... .... It's retarded. Yep! That's totally what I think! Yup! I love it so much, that it's.. uh.. Irresistible! Yeah! Uh, I have, to, uh, to, um, like, uh, feed.. uh.. my bunnies, so, uh, I'll.. uh, be going now.. See you later. Chapter Shevn - Da mofinLEGEND Purple - Derpy Pink - Muffin -- ok so i hav da mofin an i druggd it wit chorlorfurm. i throew it intoe mah refreigdergeratore and waitd for it to shtu up so i kuld eat it. den da mofin opaned da refrigeidergeradator. an he sed omg stop u noob i just wana liek fly aroun an kisss ppl on da lipsp. y dont u uderstan dat. cuz im a mofin wit sehxyness. i meen im rly shexy. i no i am but u r juts bein jellus. i meen srsly. y dont u leev me alon an i sed omg y r u so meen i just wana eat u omg dont eet mey sheyxy mofinness plz im to sexyh for u to jutss eaet me plz dont plz plz plz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111!!!!!!one!!!!!1!1!1 well ok calle me awsum den plz no u dum hors ok ill eet u den omg no plz calle me awesum den no ok ill et u now omg no ok fin da end fo now!!!!! Chapter Eight - Rarity's ConfusionHello dear. I'm Rarity, and I own the dress shop down the street. You wanted to ask me about Derpy's story? ....Derpy has a story? Oh dear. Let me read it. Rarity examines the story. ... Oh.. Oh my.. Just as I expected. Of all the possible things, this is.. THE! WORST! POSSIBLE! THING! ... ... ...I need to go. Chapter Nien - Da final mofin [TRAGEDY]LEGEND Purple - Derpy Pink - Muffin Yellow - Muffin Eater -- ok so i chaisd da mofin to da town squar. der was an evil pony lookin at da mofin like he wus gona eat it. da mofin went ovr to him. and da pony sed omg imma eat u know an da mofin sed omg plz no i promis ill be nice to u plz dont eet me plz!!!1 an i sed omg stawp hes mah mofin u dum hors no hes min somwun help plz an da pony ated da mofin an i sed NOOO!!!!!! Y!!!!! an da pony sed cuz i am evil hahaha r u mad??? omg.. he was.. the only mofin i evar lovd!!! haha noob an den he flew up into da skai. but i dont no howe cuz hes a erth poney. da end
Chapter Wun - Da manoovering mofinHello, before you start reading, read THIS.The spelling is my attempt at, well, spelling like Derpy Hooves. You know she's a derp, so of COURSE she's going to spell godawful. What I'm trying to do here is think of daily situations for the Derpster and recreate them into words, and continue on to make it incredibly bland. The tragedy tag is there for a reason, but nothing happens to our little Derp. I promise. You'll see if you continue reading this terrible story! If you get headaches easily, I suggest you don't read. It gave me a bit of one after reading it, my spelling was SO bad! Keep in mind that this is my try at making a trollfic. I hope you like it. im sittin on da couc watchin televiosn wen i get an ideea. i wanna mofin i thik. i get up an wak to da refridgerdator an ders da mofin. i trie getign it but it slideds awy frm mah hewv an went in da freeza. i opend da freeza an i trie getign it agen. but it flewe out da freza an on tawp o da televiosne an turnd purpal. i finaly gaave up nad went to slep. MUFFIN
Chapter Two - Twilight's InterruptionHello. It's me, Twilight Sparkle, student of Princess Celestia. It has come to my attention that Derpy has started writing a story, calling it "The Badlie Writne and Speld Adenturs of Deepy Hewvs". I think it is fucking ridiculous and needs to stop immediately a good chance for her to use her imagination and write. Unfortunately, she is a pretty awful speller and writer. I'm not going to get her to stop, but I suggest you quit reading. I have read over her tale and it is pretty.. what's the word.. retarded. Uh oh, here comes Derpy. I'll talk to you later!
Chapter Tree - Da epik mofin chaisLEGEND Purple - Derpy Pink - Muffin -- when i wake up i se da mofin on teh flor. i galop aftr it an it keeps movin. i go out da dor and kep chaisin it. it strts flyin an i liek start flyin to. an den were at the sugr cube curner an da mofin tals to me. it sayz: deepy hewvs ur so dum omg liek y ar ur cutie mrk like a bunc of dum bubblz. i meen dats so dum. u r rly dum. y r u so dum depy hewvs i meen liek u dont evn brake da foorth wal liek i do. com and chais after me u bitch idiot. an dan i say y r u so meen cuz im a sexy mofin but y r u a sexy mofin!1!!!!!one!!!11!!!!!1 cuz i am y r umad???????!!1 cuz ur a sexy mofin an im not a sexy mofin i wana be a sexy mofin to!!!!eleven!!1!1!!11!1!!onehundredandeleven!!11 no and he flyin awai an im liek o no u dont u dum sexy mofin and den i flie aftr him an ya. de end 4 now stay tund for da nxt chaptr.
Chapter Four - Rainbow's Words (of Awesomeness)Okay, Derpy is cool and all but her story SUCKS LIKE SHIT. Even Scootaloo can write something. SCOOTALOO. IS. A. BETTER. FUCKING. WRITER. THAN. A. FULL. GROWN. MARE.. Dude, that's sad. That's really sad. I mean, I know I'm the best at everything, but dude, a filly, better than a mare, at writing. I mean I know nopony's good at everything but.. ... RAENBO DASH WAT R U DOIN!! Oh, not again.. Sorry, that's Derp calling me. Better go, and don't tell anyone what I just said, alright??
Chapter Faiv - Da mofin of nomminessLEGEND Purple - Derpy Cyan - Zecora Pink - Muffin -- so da mofin had gotn two da evafre forst. i chaiesd it an managd to go met zecoa. she sed dat i shuld eat it wit peneut butr aftr i get it. an i said ok. but before i leave zeoca says wait take dis jaar o peenut butr an eat it in dis fursest an i say ok zeoca but is it god wit jely to? no only penut butr r u sur ya now go an get dat mofin an maik sur to com back an gimme sum to plz. i wil giv u a mofin to. ok bi bi i c da mofin at a tree an da tre loks skary. i laff at it liek ponkie pi todl me. an da tree smild at me an explodd. ok an da mofin talkd to me an it said omg lev me alon u stupid hors an i sed omg no ur a sexzy mofin so no i wanna eat u catch u an brin u bak to da refrigerderator so u will be saif an den i can hangge out wit u an we cn be frends u no cuz frendshtip is magik ok omg ok fin ill come wit u but u hav to kis me firshrst ok an den i ckissd him on da mofin lipsp. an den he sed ok lets go i prmomsi ill com ok lets go plz lik cuz now omg im a sexy mofin k plz an den i sed ok
Chapter Six - Fluttershy's PraiseUm.. Hello.. I'm Fluttershy.. I just read Derpy's story here. I really like it.. Nobody seems to believe me though.. Really, I promise, I love it... Um.. So have you seen the new movie, Ma- Oh.. Um.. Sorry.. I forgot what we were talking about. I really like Derpy's story.. .... .... .... It's retarded. Yep! That's totally what I think! Yup! I love it so much, that it's.. uh.. Irresistible! Yeah! Uh, I have, to, uh, to, um, like, uh, feed.. uh.. my bunnies, so, uh, I'll.. uh, be going now.. See you later.
Chapter Shevn - Da mofinLEGEND Purple - Derpy Pink - Muffin -- ok so i hav da mofin an i druggd it wit chorlorfurm. i throew it intoe mah refreigdergeratore and waitd for it to shtu up so i kuld eat it. den da mofin opaned da refrigeidergeradator. an he sed omg stop u noob i just wana liek fly aroun an kisss ppl on da lipsp. y dont u uderstan dat. cuz im a mofin wit sehxyness. i meen im rly shexy. i no i am but u r juts bein jellus. i meen srsly. y dont u leev me alon an i sed omg y r u so meen i just wana eat u omg dont eet mey sheyxy mofinness plz im to sexyh for u to jutss eaet me plz dont plz plz plz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111!!!!!!one!!!!!1!1!1 well ok calle me awsum den plz no u dum hors ok ill eet u den omg no plz calle me awesum den no ok ill et u now omg no ok fin da end fo now!!!!!
Chapter Eight - Rarity's ConfusionHello dear. I'm Rarity, and I own the dress shop down the street. You wanted to ask me about Derpy's story? ....Derpy has a story? Oh dear. Let me read it. Rarity examines the story. ... Oh.. Oh my.. Just as I expected. Of all the possible things, this is.. THE! WORST! POSSIBLE! THING! ... ... ...I need to go.
Chapter Nien - Da final mofin [TRAGEDY]LEGEND Purple - Derpy Pink - Muffin Yellow - Muffin Eater -- ok so i chaisd da mofin to da town squar. der was an evil pony lookin at da mofin like he wus gona eat it. da mofin went ovr to him. and da pony sed omg imma eat u know an da mofin sed omg plz no i promis ill be nice to u plz dont eet me plz!!!1 an i sed omg stawp hes mah mofin u dum hors no hes min somwun help plz an da pony ated da mofin an i sed NOOO!!!!!! Y!!!!! an da pony sed cuz i am evil hahaha r u mad??? omg.. he was.. the only mofin i evar lovd!!! haha noob an den he flew up into da skai. but i dont no howe cuz hes a erth poney. da end
