The Road to Healing

Chapter 2: First Steps

Data Log #3

For such an obviously corrupt world, it is remarkably difficult to acquire new ways to kill oneself. This is only made harder by the fact I have yet to find a drug that does more than mildly buzz my Alicorn physiology, even after taking doses that would be lethal to almost any other organic species.

What little I have been able to put together thus far paints an interesting, but horribly incomplete picture. Preliminary data suggests that time between death and revival is indeed impacted by the method of death. I was able to hang myself with a bed sheet and revived almost an hour later. When I overcharged a spell to the point where my head exploded in a fine mist of gore, I was dead for nearly three hours. I have yet to determine if repetition of the cause of death will lead to a decrease in time spent dead.

Speaking of killing myself, I really need to buy a camera so I can watch the process of my body being reconstructed. I’m sure it will be delightfully sexy.

The Journal of Duskfall Sparkle Year 1 Month 1 Day 10

I was doing some exploring of my new homeworld. With maps and some clever teleportation tricks, I’ve been slowly expanding the range of my teleportation. Ultimately, I hope to be able to teleport anywhere on the planet. That’s a thought for later.

I had been wandering about in a mountain range I had teleported to when a rockslide started. I was ecstatic, of course. I had blown off my head before, but having my whole body squished to paste by a boulder was something new and exciting. Even now the thought makes me extremely horny. Both fortunately and unfortunately, that is not what ended up happening.

Instead of my entire body being smashed, a particularly large boulder with sharp edges caught only my head and tore it clean off. At first I was disappointed and that disappointment expressed itself in my body language. I stamped a hoof in frustration. It was only after reviving that I realized what that meant.

Even with my head separated from my body, I could still move my body around until it died. This opens up some astonishing possibilities. Of course, there’s one thing I’m going to have to try before anything else.

When I get back to the shack I have claimed as my own, I’m going to find something long and sharp and decapitate myself cleanly. I can’t wait to see if my idea holds water~

End of Journal Entry

Duskfall appeared in a flash of magic. A quick visit to the nearby dump and she had discovered a piece of metal she had easily sharpened into a makeshift blade. Now it was time to test a hypothesis. Duskfall cast a number of blood coagulation spells on herself to give her the best possible chance of success. Deciding she might as well be lying down for this experiment, she placed herself on the mattress she had found and repaired. With one last excited smile, she chopped off her own head.

Time was of the essence. She willed her body to grab her severed head, which it did easily enough, and then lowered her head down to her marehood.

Even if it was her own scent of arousal, it was still a heady smell. One Duskfall wished she could appreciate more, but she was on a tight schedule as it was. Shoving her muzzle directly into her pussy, Duskfall licked.

The feeling was so strange. She had been eaten out exactly once during her stay thus far and it had been a wonderful experience. Now she was both giving and receiving and the sheer fetish fuel of the situation combined with the sexy sound of her own blood dripping from her severed neck caused her to orgasm almost immediately.

As her body died and her consciousness once more grew dark Duskfall couldn’t help but think she really needed to work on her hair trigger if she was going to use herself as practice for pleasing other females. She could also almost certainly increase the time her body survived.

The Journal of Duskfall Sparkle Year 1 Month 1 Day 12

I’ve slowly been refining both the spell to keep my body going after decapitation and my technique in orally pleasuring a mare or woman. I will admit to some embarrassment, as more than once I’ve dropped my head after orgasm and had to waste precious time coordinating my body retrieving my head. I really have to figure out how to cast magic while decapitated.

Of course, this is all well and good for my being a good sex toy for females, but I feel I’m doing a disservice to the males I could be helping. To that end, I’ve been visiting libraries and looking into transformation magic. Twilight knew some, but they came with limitations, such as needing a living subject to base the transformation on and being complete transformations. Fortunately I’ve been able to find several helpful books. I imagine in a couple of day’s time I’ll be able to grow a dick on myself and then I can start practicing blowjobs too!

Ideally I’ll be able to eventually transform myself at will. I am not so arrogant as to presume everyone will find a pony body attractive. If I can become even a close approximation of any species I want and any sex I choose, then I’m sure to be able to help lots more people! Even better, if I can transform myself into the image of someone my user hates, then I can offer relief by letting them kill me or hate fuck me! Wouldn’t that be wonderful?!

It’s all a matter of finding the right spells and practicing. Normally such magic isn’t practiced amongst ponies, both due to lack of power and because one wrong move can kill you. Fortunately, neither of those are a problem for me! I’m kinda looking forward to the first time one of my transformation spells goes catastrophically wrong.

Data Log #5

First attempt to give myself a penis semi successful. Cross-referencing Tom’s memories and what I have encountered since coming to Hell’s Armpit, I have created an average looking phallus. An average looking human phallus…with no scrotum. There is also the matter of how it feels. It does feel like it is attached to me, but beyond that I might as well be wearing a strap on for all the sensitivity it has. Getting an erection with it was difficult, but not impossible.

Review transformation matrix used. Maybe kidnap a male to attempt ‘copy and paste’ his penis onto my body? Maybe getting my magic familiar with a phallus will help fill in the missing pieces of this transformation spell? Erase memories of captured subject afterward, of course. Hopefully this will be a short term crutch. I’d rather not have to kidnap someone the first time I want to modify some part of my body every time I come up with a new idea. I could do it, of course, but it’d take time and effort I could be spending being killed or being used as a fuck toy.

Will hold off on kidnapping for two more days. If still not successful, then I will resort to drastic measures.

Author's Note

Duskfall Sparkle

Mental Corruption: 99.98%

Afflictions:
Addicted to sex
Addicted to dying

Perks:
Insanity [105%]
Darkness [24%]
Magic [108%]
Immortality

Out of sheer curiosity, I did a quick look into dullahan smut. Having a female dullahan eat herself out is astonishingly uncommon. You're welcome?