Murder Time, Fun Time

It wasn’t long before the Saints were back together, except Pierce. Shaundi had not yet gotten over her emotional high as a result of her concerns about Johnny’s potential death so she continued yelling at Johnny in his face. Johnny knew she didn’t mean anything bad about it so he let her vent.

Meanwhile, Pinkamena approached Playa and asked why he was in a bad mood.

“Someone hacked into our bank account and stole our money,” Playa growled.

“Looks like we’re starting from scratch then. Fine by me. We can show the Syndicate how we defeated the Samedi, Ronin and Brotherhood this way.”

“Well, if we’re goin’ against the Syndicate, we better make sure we have enough weapons and ammo.” Playa pulled out his phone and used the GPS to locate the nearest Friendly Fire. He then looked down the road that was next to a large number of strip joints to find a lone car near the intersection.

Playa, Pinkamena, Johnny and Shaundi entered the vehicle and Playa drove them to the Friendly Fire.

On the way, Pinkamena pulled out her phone to call Zach and Bobby to let them know they were in Steelport. The announcers let her know that for her participation in the Genki franchise, they were giving her a promotional knife that she could collect from any Friendly Fire in Steelport. Pinkamena’s knife had seen a lot of use over the years and just like her first knife from when she started killing gangs, it was getting rusty.

After a few collisions, the group arrived at the nearest Friendly Fire.

Unlike in Stilwater, the gun shops in Steelport offered weapon upgrades in addition to ammunition. Playa decided to improve his pistol while filling up his ammo reserves which had become finite again at some point.

After the shopkeeper was finished doing business with Playa, he turned his attention to Pinkamena. “You here to buy guns?” he asked.

“I was told you have a promotional item for me.”

“You’re Professor Pinkamena?”

Pinkamena tilted her head in confusion. “Professor? That’s a new one. But my name is Pinkamena.”

“You didn’t know? The producers of the Professor Genki franchise have been publicly promoting you as the Professor’s colleague, Professor Pinkamena. They say someone could build a whole mountain of the corpses you made in Stilwater and Steelport.”

Pinkamena was taken aback and was slow to regain her composure, “Wow, that actually sounds a bit flattering. I don’t know about ‘mountain’ though since I never bothered to count my kills; never saw the point in doing that.” Once her composure was fully regained, she turned the conversation back to the main topic, “So about my promotional item?”

The shopkeeper went into the back of the store and brought back an interesting-looking knife. The blade and handle were intricately designed with what appeared to be vines engraved throughout the weapon.

“Here you are, one accurately crafted Vorpal Blade.”

“Vorpal Blade?” she said as she took the knife. “What is this, ‘American McGee’s Alice’?” She studied the blade further. “Make that ‘Madness Returns’.”

“The Professor said that the knife was made of a material that would never rust. He also said that it would fit your psychotic image.”

Pinkamena rolled her eyes. “Fine, I’ll take it. But if I suddenly start running around in a blue and white dress with symbols on it, don’t come crying to me if Electronic Arts starts throwing a fit over this.”

Pinkamena decided to buy up the available upgrades to her weapons since unlike Playa, Pinkamena kept her personal funds separate from the Saints’ accounts. Her upgrades to her Vorpal Blade had given the blade an ebony color and the handle was scarlet.

Outside the store, Playa was discussing with Shaundi and Johnny about what to do next. “Shaundi, did you get in contact with Pierce?” Playa asked.

“I texted him a few minutes ago, he’s bringing the crew.”

“Looks like we’re gonna need more guns for the crew, any suggestions.”

“Maybe we can raid the guard armory,” Shaundi suggested sarcastically as a joke.

“Good idea.”

“What!?”

“Hey yeah, I like that plan,” Johnny added.

“Are you guys fucking serious?” Shaundi asked.

“Shaundi, you’ve been with us long enough to know that paramilitary organizations don’t scare us. An armory shouldn’t be a problem,” Pinkamena said.

“I could really go for some Dust right now.”

The group immediately ran for cover the moment the vehicle stopped in the military base. Playa was impressed with the improved effectiveness of his pistol while Shaundi focused on staying alive and Johnny worked on his kill count.

A wicked smile formed on Pinkamena’s face as her Vorpal Blade cut cleanly through the soldiers’ armor and the soldier. Gilda, who had been following the Saints from the air, unleashed death from above as her SMGs tore through the dwindling number of soldiers in the base.

Shaundi got impatient with Pierce so she called him to demand where he was at.

Pierce arrived in dramatic fashion with a fleet of helicopters carrying Saints, including Treehugger, who finished off the few remaining soldiers in the base.

Playa spotted a large bomb in the base and decided to take that with them in addition to the weapons that were lying around. As military reinforcements moved in, Playa decided to play around with advanced military hardware called Reaper Drones and unleashed destruction upon the tanks that were moving in.

Once the bomb was loaded up to be airlifted, the Saints boarded a helicopter and flew away from the base with a number of military choppers in pursuit. Gilda tore through the pursuers with rockets or cut their tails off with her nanite claws.

Once the pursuit was eliminated, the Saints set the bomb down on the roof of the apartment building that was occupied by one of Shaundi’s ex-boyfriends.

Now that they had some time to breathe, the Saints gathered together to discuss their next move. Playa believed that the first order of business was to find a place to call a headquarters because the apartment was too small to consider as a base of operations for the long term.

Playa drove around the city with Pierce while Pinkamena filled Treehugger in on the situation. She then took the two to the nearby Friendly Fire and had them pick up some updated and upgraded weapons. Gilda received a new pair of SMGs and a better RPG launcher. Treehugger had her flamethrower improved upon while Pinkamena gave her a grenade launcher so she would be able to deal with enemy vehicles.

As they left the store, the group was ambushed by a group of Syndicate troops who were quickly dispatched by Gilda and Treehugger.

The real opponent was an overgrown hulk of a human who wore clothes that looked like they barely fit him.

The Brute attacked the group using nothing but his brute strength to fight them. All three of them evaded his charge. The Brute turned around and charged at Gilda who was caught off guard by how quickly the Brute reacted.

Before he could reach his target, Pinkamena got between the two before she jumped upward and decapitated the Brute with one slash.from her Vorpal Blade.

Once the headless mountain of flesh collapsed on the street, Gilda breathed a sigh of relief. “Thanks for the save.”

“You’re welcome.” Pinkamena began examining the head of the Brute and found something oddly familiar about the person. After a few moments of thought, she realized that he looked just like the Brutes that were sent after her during her time participating in Genki’s game show. If the likeness really was exact, then the Brutes were somehow copies of someone. Either someone knew of a copy spell or she had discovered another aspect of human science.

Pinkamena tossed the Brute’s head away as she heard a vehicle approach and stopped near them. Playa and Pierce saw the trio and had them get in the car. Pinkamena and Treehugger complied while Gilda followed from the air.

“Something to note about Steelport,” Pierce began, “There ain’t no Forgive and Forgets around here, but the Syndicate and police won’t cross us on our own turf. Since that studio apartment is the only turf we have right now, it’s the only way to drop our notoriety.”

Playa drove straight for the crib and the group retreated into the building which made the Morningstar back off for the time being.

Feeling that they have had a productive evening in Steelport, the crew each found a place to get some sleep before they moved against the Syndicate again.

Much of the next day was spent getting the lay of the city. Johnny, Pierce and Shaundi were out collecting useful info about the city or Loren and the Syndicate.

It was evening by the time Playa decided to give Pierce a call to check on him. Pierce informed him about a penthouse owned by the Syndicate and of a party going on there. The lieutenant suggested crashing the party by parachuting onto the penthouse. The other Saints would be waiting for him to unlock the elevator from the bottom floor.

Playa decided to go with the idea and drove to the airport while at the same time questioning why he thought Pierce’s idea was a good one.

A helicopter hovered over the penthouse. Playa and Pinkamena were preparing to jump onto the building when Playa noticed that Pinkamena wasn’t wearing a parachute. “Why aren’t you wearing a parachute?” he asked. “You better not be thinking about using me as a cushion again because I’ve had enough of that.”

The madmare stared at Playa for a moment before looking at the penthouse. “Don’t worry about that, I have my own landing plan. You can go first.”

Playa shrugged and jumped off the helicopter and deployed his parachute but failed to take into account the wind above the penthouse and nearly fell off course to miss the building. After thanking his luck for not failing that base jump, he took off his parachute and headed to the Syndicate lieutenant hanging out by the pool.

Pinkamena overheard the conversation over the radio between Playa and the Morningstar lieutenant and heard that the elevator code was 3131.

“I’m getting a sense of deja vu.” Pinkamena thought.

“Oh, that’s because it was the same code that was used for the penthouse elevator back in Stilwater when the Vice Kings owned that building.” Pinkie commented.

Pinkamena mentally groaned, “Lazy Volition...”

After Playa chucked the lieutenant off the penthouse, Pinkamena jumped from the helicopter and pulled out a hobby horse from her mane. Her aim was right on target as she fell toward the pool. The madmare held the hobby horse above her head and motioned to slam the pool with the child’s toy.

The impact from Pinkamena’s attack created a large shockwave that caused all of the water in the pool to fly outward and splash everyone around the pool, including Playa. Many of the Syndicate were carried away in Pinkamena’s tsunami and off the building.

Playa managed to avoid the wave but couldn’t help but yell at the mare, “Dammit Pinkamena, warn me next time you do that. I almost had to use my spare parachute and wait with the others on the bottom floor.”

“Now what would be the fun in that?” Pinkamena quipped.

Playa’s phone rang. “Boss, the whole building just shook. What the hell happened?” Shaundi asked.

“Don’t worry about it, Pinkamena just got carried away. I’m actually surprised she didn’t smash her way to a lower floor.”

“How did she do that?”

“She’s Pinkamena, don’t question it. I stopped doing that a long time ago.”

Playa hung up and the duo engaged the Syndicate inside the penthouse. The Saints leader urged the madmare to keep the blood to a minimum because they were going to be living in the penthouse and a bloodied penthouse would be a hassle to clean up. Pinkamena complied and restricted herself to simple stabs and her guns that left little blood.

The duo fought to the elevator downstairs and entered the code, allowing the other Saints into the penthouse.

While the Saints were clearing out the place, Shaundi reported that more Morningstar were being dropped off by helicopter. Treehugger rushed to the helipad and hosed the new arrivals in fire.

Shaundi also reported a bomb that was set on a timer and they needed to disarm it fast. Playa noticed that one of the helicopters was fleeing the building, likely carrying the person who knew how to disarm the bomb. Playa also noticed that Pinkamena was missing. At the same time, he noticed that the fleeing helicopter was moving erratically before it started to move normally again. Playa pulled out his binocular and saw the pilot falling from the helicopter to the street below.

Playa’s phone rang again to find that Pinkamena was calling. “Red wire,” she said.

“Red wire, Shaundi,” Playa shouted to the lieutenant.

“Damn, I lost the bet.” Shaundi mumbled as she cut the red wire and disarmed the bomb.

The helicopter returned to the helipad and Pinkamena emerged from the cockpit.

“Alright, let’s get the crew in here and get this place cleaned up,” Playa ordered. “Let me know if we find anything useful in this place that we can use against the Syndicate.”

The rest of the evening was spent cleaning up after the party and checking out what the penthouse had to offer.