23. Pinkie Pie*

Back in Canterlot, Anon fell through the mirror portal onto the stone floor, catching himself with his hands that had, only a moment ago, been hooves. He stood upright with the shopping bag straps still in his teeth. He looked at his hands and articulated his fingers as though seeing them again for the first time, much like when he woke up from his dreamt lifetime as a pony with Luna. That memory did not improve his mood.

He grabbed the bag handles from his mouth and looked at his reflection in the mirror. He felt the weight of the stallion dildo in his bag and looked at the relatively modest tent in his pants. The sheer heft of his horse cock swinging under him was still quite a vivid memory. As was the tightness of Sunset Shimmer's human form around it. There had been some days where he had been so exhausted from work that he had a hard time walking home. He wondered how she was able to walk at all after that.

"Whatever." Anon walked out of the storage room and navigated the halls of Princess Twilight Sparkle's castle. The light shining through the stained glass windows told him that at least the sun was still up. "Well, that's a plus." His mental map of the castle was dubious at best. The hallways all looked very similar as he bumbled his way more or less in a southern direction, if the afternoon sun was to be believed. Trying to find his way out, he walked past a familiar gryphon.

"This place is a labyrinth," Anon said.

"Yeah, well, it's kinda meant to be that way," Gallus said. "As a security measure."

Anon rubbed the back of his neck. "I guess that makes sense. So how do I..?"

Gallus pointed at the opposite hallway and started to explain the route out when the massive door behind him opened.

"Gallus, let me know when that book I ordered- oh, Anon! Back so soon?" Princess Twilight Sparkle asked.

"Am I?" he asked. "It's hard to tell." Twilight gave him a concerned look. "Actually, do you think you could call me a chariot to get back to Ponyville? The train probably wouldn't get there until after dark."

"Oh, I can get you there!" Twilight said. "Just make sure you hold your breath."

"Why? Are you going to-?" Anon vanished in a flash and reappeared outside of the Ponyville spa. "Uugh!" Anon wheezed as he felt his stomach do a flip. "I will never get used to that shit!"

The front door of the spa flew open and Lotus nearly crashed into Anon as she ran out. "Anon! What are you doing back? I thought you had taken the rest of the day off."

"Is it still today?" Anon asked. Lotus looked at him strangely. He had only managed to further confuse her. "Sorry. It's been a long day."

"You said you needed to go tool shopping. Were you successful?" Lotus asked.

"More or less," he answered. "Since I'm here..." He held out the bag from The Crop. Lotus glanced inside the bag at the deluxe edition Big Red with the realistic texture.

"Simply luxurious! Aloe and I were looking for this last night!" Lotus said, before blushing. "While doing inventory! I was just doing inventory."

"It's okay, Lotus. I believe you," Anon lied. He turned to leave.

"Anon, while you're here-" she added.

"Oh, this should be good..."

"I was just on my way to get some more stones for the hot stone massage," Lotus said.

"I don't care how hot they look, I'm not massaging them," Anon said.

Lotus looked flustered. "No, Anon. The stones are for-"

Anon waved his hand. "I know what they're for. I was making a joke."

"Oh. Ha ha. I get jokes," Lotus said awkwardly.

"Uh huh."

"But since we are covering your shift this afternoon, do you think you could pick some up?"

"And there it is."

"Please?"

"Lotus,"

"Pretty please?"

"Lotus,"

"I'll give your penis a special mouth massage!"

"..."

"..."

"God damn, that's cute."

"Is that a yes?"

"What happened to the ones we already had!?" he asked.

"They have gone missing. Considering the time of year, I can only speculate-"

"Right. They're probably up somepony's twat."

Lotus slugged him in the thigh with her hoof. "Language, Anon!"

"Sorry. Okay, fine, where am I going for these?"

"A rock farm."

"..."

"..."

"Is that a real thing?"

"Yes."

Lotus gave him the directions.

"... Well, that's going to be a hike."

Following Lotus's directions, Anon walked up the dirt road to the Ponyville rock farm. "Ponyville adjacent at best," he grumbled. His mind wandered to thoughts of his home, and Chryssi making him one of her famous green omelets as he shuffled his way though a carpet of deciduous leaves on the ground, leftover from the previous autumn. A grin spread across his face, thinking about that special thing she did for him with the hole in her leg as he-

The ground fell out from under him as he tumbled though the leaf litter into a deep pit.

~

"The fuck!?" Anon blinked though the raised dust and spotted a rope hanging down. He grabbed it to try to climb out. The rope snapped in his hands, releasing the counterweight for a mechanism that started ringing a bell.

A short while later he could hear hoof-steps approaching.

"It better be a stallion this time," he heard a gruff mare's voice say.

"Unless he flew away," another deadpanned. "Or teleported."

"Pegasi and unicorns don't bother with the rope!" the first one said. A dark-grey mare with a light-grey mane appeared above the pit. "Oh. It's just another animal."

"Oh, you have no idea," Anon said.

"Oh, shit! It can talk!"

A medium-grey pony with lavender bangs appeared, wearing a frock. "It can speak. But does it have a soul?"

A light-grey pony with a dark-grey mane stood next to them, saying nothing.

"It rubs the lotion on it's skin!" a pink pony said as she pronked up alongside the others. "Oh wait Maud, I know this animal! Hi Anon!"

"Hello Pinkie."

"So is this a catch and release?" Maud deadpanned.

"It's not a stallion," the gruff one said. "It can't give us what we need."

"Don't worry, Limestone, he has something even better!" Pinkie Pie said with glee as she hopped in place. "Aren't you excited Marble?"

"Mhmm," Marble nodded.

"I actually came for rocks," Anon said.

"Well, that's one thing we have in common," Maud said flatly.

Pinkie Pie fell over laughing. "Oh, Maud! You are just the funniest!"

"Would you please let me out of here?" Anon asked. "If I die in a hole I lose a bet." Limestone tossed a rope over a heavy tree limb and lowered one end down to him while the rest of them pulled the other end to lift him out. Once Anon was back at ground level, he dusted himself off. "Now if I could just get some-"

Limestone twirled the rope on the air and snagged him in a lasso before wrapping several more coiled around him. "Well, Marble, it's not the male you wanted, but..." Limestone said as she started to pull Anon along up the hill towards the farm house.

"Um, excuse you!" Anon said, struggling against his bindings. "First of all, no! Second of all, I'm off the clock!"

Pinkie Pie took the rope away from Limestone. "Girls, can we have just a moment?" Limestone snorted at her but just the same, walked away to the farmhouse with the other two. Pinkie turned around to face him. "Anon, can you do me a flavor?"

"A wha-? No! Pinkie, I just came here to get some massage stones for Lotus."

"So I have something that you want, to make a deal. So there must be something that you have, that I want, to make a deal."

"Yeah. Currency. Now untie me!"

"I will. Swearsies," she said. "But you know, it is that time of year..."

"I'm fucking well aware. But don't you already have a stallion?"

"I do," she said. "But we all grew up on a farm together out in the middle of nowhere. I mean, I left when I was a filly and traveled all over but they stayed, you know? Just three strong, young farm fillies blossoming into nubile maturity without a single colt for miles around, suffocating in their collective hormonal, lonesome desires. Marble... she's never had a stallion. So you need to de-virginize her!"

"I don't need to do anything!" Anon said. "Untie me!"

Pinkie smirked and tugged his rope closer. "You are in a position unsuitable to make demands. I could just give you back to Lime and let her have her way with you."

"Are we really doing good cop bad cop right now?"

Pinkie Pie's playful expression faded away. "Please?" Anon remained unmoved. "If not for me, for her? We were trying to save up for Big Mac before he got married and retired. But he wasn't cheap. And working a rock farm doesn't exactly make you rich."

"If you couldn't afford Mac, then you couldn't afford me."

"But that's why you'd give me friend's rates. For your best friend, Pinkie Pie?" She blinked rapidly at him.

"What are you doing?"

"...Being sexy?"

"Well, it looks like you're having a seizure."

"Pretty please? Get her rocks off and then you can have yours."

"I'm worth more than some rocks." Pinkie Pie's hair drooped and she looked like she was about to cry. "Oh, for fuck's sake, stop! That's blackmail! Fine! I'll do it! But you owe me something special!"

Her hair sprang back pinker than ever. "Yippie!" She bounded along, pulling Anon with her.

* Pinkie Pie & Co.

"Hey, you said you'd untie me!"

Pinkie smirked. "I will..." As they got closer to the farmhouse, Maud and Limestone opened the bulkhead leading down to the cellar.

Anon tried to pull away. "What? No! This is how horror movies start!"

"It'll be ~fine~," Pinkie sang as she pulled him along downstairs. The basement foundation walls were simple field stone, because of course they were. There was storage for some yard tools and barrels a various sundries. In the center of the room was a simple cot with a hay-stuffed mattress. Next to the bed was the statue of clearly a stallion, and it was strapped to washing machine.

"The hell is that?" Anon asked.

"Oh, that's just Maud's husband, Mudbriar," Pinkie explained. "He looked into the eyes of a cockatrice and got turned into a hunk of rock."

"You've got the hunk part right," Maud said, stroking the statue's permanent erection. "He's finally hard enough to satisfy me."

"Oh god, this is how I die..."

"Don't be so dramatic, Anon!" Pinkie said, pushing him onto the bed. She turned around and looked at Marble walking downstairs. "See? He's harmless!" Limestone walked down after her and closed the bulkhead door.

"I've heard about you," Limestone said, nipping at his pants to yank them off. She looked at his flaccid penis. "I'm not impressed."

"Well shucks, it's a mystery why you're single," Anon sassed. Limestone's nostrils flared.

"It's a neat trick," Pinkie said. "Watch! He just needs mouth hugs!" In a flash she dove into Anon's lap and sucked his dick like it was her only source of oxygen.

"F-fuck!" Anon squirmed in reflex but was unable to move away from the mare that seemed like she was trying to suck out his soul. "Pinkie, I thought you were married!"

"Look who you're talking to," Limestone said. "Do you really think any one stallion would be enough for her? Shit, I bet Cheese is grateful to get a break today."

Pinkie Pie's giggle was muffled with Anon's dick in her mouth. She didn't need long before she slowly lifted her face up off his shaft, glistening wet and now fully erect, practically tripling its dimensions in both length and girth.

"See Marble? The perfect practice peener! Not as big and scary as a stallion's," Pinkie said.

"Mhmm," Marble agreed.

"Hop on!" Pinkie invited. Marble nervously climbed up onto the cot and squatted slightly, hovering above Anon's dick. Pinkie reached underneath her and held his dick to help aim it. "It's already nice and wet for you." Anon wasn't sure who she was saying that too. Both would have been true. Marble's needy marehood looked plenty damp as well by the time they made contact. Pinkie rubbed his dick back and forth along Marble marehood before lining it up to guide it inside as she sat down. "There you go! Just slide it all the way in!" Pinkie watched the rest of Anon's dick vanish inside of her little sister until her hips met his. "Yay! You're no longer a virgin!"

"Truly a joyous occasion," Maud said.

"About damn time!" Limestone groused.

"Feels good, huh?" Pinkie asked.

Marble nodded. "Mhmm."

"Go on then!" Pinkie coached.

Marble steadied her balance and slowly lifted her hips again to start fucking him. Nervously at first. As she became more comfortable and accustomed to the new sensation the nervousness turned into awkwardness. Anon looked up at her and she looked down at him through her bangs. She didn't look disappointed so much as bored.

"You okay?" Anon asked.

"Mhmm."

Limestone huffed. "Fine, I'll say it. Fucking boring!"

"Well, I usually take a more active roll, but..." Anon wiggled a bit in his rope.

"It's up to you, Marble."

Marble blushed for a moment, but tugged at the rope's knot to untie it. Anon shimmied out of the bindings and freed his arms. He gently placed his palm against Marble's chest. "Here, lean back a bit," he coached. She reared up a little and balanced herself to sit more upright, but found that it was hard for her to keep going and still keep her balance. Anon held her hooves and placed them on his chest for balance. "Just hold still and let me." The suggestion seemed to please her.

His his hands free, he was able to hold her flanks and help support her weight, giving his hips room to thrust up into her. Just like trying to tickle one's self, the sensation changed once she was no longer in control. Her entire demeanor changed from bored to a mixture of scared and excited. And her sitting upright gave Anon the perfect angle to thrust inside her and hit her g-spot.

Her hooves went weak and she wanted to collapse forward on top of him. But Anon slid his hands up along her body to steady her midsection for balance without relenting with his hips. Her muscles trembled so slightly it was barely a shiver. Anon had experienced such a wide variety of mare climaxes, some being literally earth-shaking.

But the small squeeze her pussy gave his dick almost escaped his notice, were it not punctuated by the little squeaking noises she made. She didn't gush or squirt dramatically. She just got a bit more juicy, making their hip smack together with wet slaps. The room smelled of estrus the moment he walked in, but now they were practically swimming in a miasma of it.

Limestone leaned against the basement doorway, wearing an indignant expression on her face as she tried to pretend like she wasn't watching while she shifted her thighs together. Pinkie Pie lacked any such subtlety, sitting crouched at the end of the cot and staring intently at where Anon's glistening dick was sliding in and out of Marble's pussy.

"You did it Marble!" Pinkie cheered.

"Mhmm!"

"Congratulations," Maud said.

"Great. Now wrap it up so I can have my turn with him!" Limestone barked.

"Oh, he's just getting started!" Pinkie said. "Isn't that right?"

"Can't she get her own stallion?" Anon asked.

"I don't know," Pinkie Pie teased as she looked at Limestone. "Can you?"

"I can get any stallion I want. I just don't because stallions are useless. I've never had one able to get me off."

Anon relaxed his hands on Marble's sides and finally left her flop on top of him while he continued to gently fuck her. She practically purred as she nuzzled her cheek against his. He normally made a point of keeping his vocation professional. He was unaccustomed to such sudden intimacy. He reached up to shift her shoulders away but she melted into what she took to be a hug. He couldn't imagine a sister of Pinkie Pie being touch-starved. But having experienced Pinkie's "hugs" himself, he could understand the mixture of dread associated with them. He held her and moved his hands up along her back to run his fingers through her mane. She whimpered and her entire body shuddered even harder. Fresh warmth from her dribbled down his balls as she came again.

"That's it!" Limestone shouted as she finished adjusting her straps. "I'm done being patient!" She stormed over and practically body-checked Marble off of Anon.

"Hey!" Anon shouted.

"It's my turn!" Limestone growled, brandishing her strap-on.

Anon got to his feet immediately. "Marble, are you okay?"

"Mhmm."

He turned and faced Limestone. The low ceiling of the basement was just barely high enough to keep from from hitting his head. He towered over her.

"Do you always bully your sister this much!?" he asked.

"Only when she's awake," Maud said, getting a giggle from Pinkie.

"Apologize to her!" Anon demanded.

"I'm not apologizing for shit!" Limestone barked. "This is my farm. I've been running it for years. I make the rules. So you can go fuck yourself. Or even better, I can do it! Now bend over!"

Anon was never one to get into a physical altercation with a lady. But Limestone no longer qualified for the title. In a flash he grabbed a fist full of her mane. She yelped out a high pitch noise, which he expected, but it was most definitely a moan.

"APOLOGIZE TO HER!" Anon's commanding voice boomed in the small room. One could have mistaken Anon for using unicorn magic to pull Limestone's tail up for how fast and how high she flagged it.

"Ooh! Nopony has ever scolded Limey like that since Dad died," Pinkie said.

A massive puzzle piece fell into place. He twisted his wrist to tighten his grip on her mane to pull her head back and whispered into her ear. "I know what you are, Lime. I've met enough girl-boss bullies just like you. You think you're so tough on the outside. You want to be that dominatrix that you pretend you are in your mind. But deep down you're still just a little daddy's-girl that craves discipline."

Anon's free hand unclasped the strap-on harness, letting it fall off her. He gave her tail a firm tug, making her knees practically buckle as her clitoris winked. He cupped her vulva with his hand, feeling how wet she had gotten. He slipped a couple fingers inside, wasting no time to hit her g-spot aggressively. He kept massaging her clit with his thumb, feeling her getting even wetter, but even with three fingers blasting her, she was stubbornly holding out.

His thumb joined the rest of his fingers as he worked his hand inside her stretched pussy and balling his hand into a fist. "Is that enough for you?" he asked.

"Shut up!" she tried to sound tough, but her tone fell hollow in a moan and he started fisting her. "You're just... some... stupid monkey!"

"I have a name. Say my name!" he said as he fisted her faster. "Say it!"

Limestone just growled in defiance.

"My name is Anon! And you, are a very. Naughty. FILLY!" He pulled his hand out of her pussy gave her flank a very hard, wet slap.

"~DADDY~!" Limestone cried out as she came hard. Her knees actually buckled as she squirted thick jets on the dirt floor, gushing enough to make a puddle marecum mud.

"I'm not going to read into that too much..." Anon practically had to carry Limestone, over to Marble. "Now apologize!"

"M'sorry Merble," Limestone slurred.

"Do you accept her apology?" Anon asked Marble.

"Mhmm."

Anon set Limestone down next to the cot and Pinkie Pie practically tackled him. "Me next! ME NEXT!" He landed on the hay mattress and she pounced into his lap like a giant, pink cat. "I am so bucking ready!"

"Okay, uh, so are you sure your husband would be okay with this?" Anon asked.

"Maud and Mud Briar are strictly monogamous. But I have a very high drive," Pinkie explained. "So Cheese and I have a kinda open thing. Limey's right. He appreciates a break every now and then."

"Okay then... so how do you want me to-" Anon was cut off by the noise of a loud crash. He looked behind them at Maud throwing a brick into the washing machine strapped to the stone stallion statue. She lifted the hem of her frock and backed herself up onto the course, cement shaft, getting the full length of it inside her pussy.

"Farm girls make do," Maud explained, before turning the machine on to spin-cycle.

"What the fuck!?" he recoiled in horror as the entire assemble shook so violently around, and inside her, that he was certain that he was going to have to take her to the hospital with a shattered pelvis. But she just rode it with about as much excitement as riding an escalator.

"That!" Pinkie said, pointing at Maud getting absolutely wrecked but the infernal contraption. "I want you to do that, Anon!" She wiggled her rump insistently.

"I can't do that!" he said.

"Can't? Or won't?" she asked.

"Either!? Both!?"

She squirmed in his lap in growing frustration. "Don't do that. Don't treat me like I'm made of glass! Cheese used to do it right, but ever since we had Lil Cheese he's too scared to be rough anymore, and it makes it hard for me to get off!"

Anon lifted her tail and ran his fingers along the middle of her puffy, pink pussy. He found that she was already plenty wet and he was able to easily get a few fingers started inside her. "Okay, I can be a little rough, but..." Anon looked at Maud riding a magnitude-9 earthquake behind them. "But not that."

She purred as he got four fingers in and played his thumb on her clitoris. "You're such a tease!" The muscles of her pussy flexed and squeezed around his fingers as he played with her some more. "You don't have to go slow. It's practically bubble yum by now." As strong as her vaginal muscles felt, she actually was quite stretchy, and he was able to add his thumb and get in up to his wrist with relative ease. "Don't keep me waiting!"

Anon made short piston motions with his forearm, watching with morbid fascination just how fast her pussy seemed intent to swallow it until the knuckles of his fist bottomed out inside her. He got straight away to his task, working the length of his arm in and out of her.

"Faster!" she demanded, looking over at Maud. "Like that! HARDER!"

"P-Pinkie, are you sur-?"

"HARDER!!"

"OK..."

Anon pulled his arm out a bit further and shoved it back in harder each time. If this mare really wanted him to find her limit, he was going to show it to her. He had to hold her in place with his free hand to keep her from getting fisted right off his lap. He kept expecting her to suddenly yelp in pain and scream for him to stop, but it never came. In fact the harder he went, the more she seemed to be enjoying it. Her face was flushed and she was panting. He was almost punching her and her tongue just lolled out in a goofy grin.

He went just a bit too deep and hit her cervix. That would do it.

She yelped, but just moaned louder and pushed herself back harder against his fist, making him hit it more. "Yes! Yes! Yes!" She propped herself up. "Marble, look it, look it!" Pinkie Pie's prehensile tail wrapped around Anon's upper arm and pulled him inside even harder, making a bulge appear in her abdomen. Pinkie reached out to hug Limestone, and her tail pulled his arm in again, making her stomach punch Limestone's stomach. "He he!"

Anon was helpless to stop her from dragging him around, elbow-deep inside her. "What is wrong with you!?"

"A lot," Maud said with zero self-awareness.

"Ooh! OOH! It's gonna happen!" Pinkie squealed. "I can feel it coming, it's gonna happen! Flip me over!" Pinkie practically suplexed Anon, forcing him to flip over along with her as she flopped onto her back in the cot. Anon recovered as fast as he could, but not fast enough. "Don't pussy out now! GO GO GO!"

Anon was getting genuinely irritated with her. He adjusted his stance to really punch her. Really punch her. He was trying to win a title fight with her uterus and she was ~loving~ it! "Yes. Yes! YES! YES!" Her legs clamped together on him and then kicked apart with a single, powerful flex of her vaginal muscles that ejected his whole arm like a cannon ball, launching him across the small room, followed by a shower of confetti.

Anon slumped against the wall and panted. "Okay, yeah. I can see why Cheese would want a break from that."

"ARGH! It got in my mouth! PTFF!" Limestone spat out the bits of colorful paper.

After the ordeal with Pinkie Pie, Anon was able to finish what he started with Marble while Limestone waited patiently. He rubbed Marble's back while they had refreshingly gentle intercourse without feeling the need to rush. He took his time with her, letting her feel comfortable enough to cum again a couple more times. She just cooed and purred, enjoying his tender touch as he gave her ear scritches. But all good things must come to an end.

"Is my good filly ready for a nice little creampie?" he asked.

"Mhmm!"

Anon grabbed her hips and gave her a few last good thrusts before he came inside her as deep as he could. "And... there we go. Now doesn't that feel better?"

"Mhmm!"

Limestone cleared her throat.

"Okay. Remember what we talk about sharing?"

"Mhmm."

"Okay Lime, get up here," Anon directed. Limestone got on the cot and laid down. Marble climbed over her and squatted while Anon stretched open Limestone's pussy, letting part of Marble's creampie drip in, making sure she got a dose of male-jam to quell her heat as well. "Now what do we say?"

Limestone grumbled, but she could feel the ache of her heat melting away. "Thank you, Marble."

The pervasive noise in the room fell silent as the washing machine motor finally burned out.

"I have climaxed," Maud said, extricating herself from the statue's shaft. She walked over and took Anon's hands with her hooves before squatting over them. "Your massage stones are ready." With a small grunt, about a dozen freshly-polished rocks slid out of her rock-tumbler vagina into his waiting hands.

Anon looked at the stones. "Oh. So that's where those come from."

Author's Note

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