Dangly Bits

The next day, Spike stood in front of Carousel Boutique, breathed in and out, and then went through the front doors. A chime rang and Rarity came out of the back room.

“Welcome to Carouse—oh! Spike! It’s so good to see you? How are you doing?”

“Hello Rarity,” Spike said, with far more confidence than he imagined he would. Perhaps this wouldn’t turn out so bad after all.

“I wasn’t expecting you, but would you like to help out with some things that I’m working on?”

“I would,” said Spike. “But that’s not the reason I came in.”

“Oh?”

Spike gulped, “I think I may be a potential client for your umm… other business. I got your card from a mare in Canterlot named Elegance, and you are highly recommended.” Spike pulled out the card and showed it to her.

Her eyes widened momentarily before going back to Spike. “Well this is quite a surprise. How long have you been looking to transition?”

Spike shrugged, “Quite a while, err… well… I’m not sure I’d call it transition. I’ve felt very off for quite a while but only recently thought I could do something about it.”

“Well, come along then, let’s discuss this over some tea. You sit on that sofa over there. And I’ll be along shortly.”

Three minutes later Spike was sitting on the same absurdly comfortable couch that Rarity kept at the side of the store, sipping on some very well spiced tea.

“I have other clients that may come and interrupt us. If somepony enters the shop, I’ll stop the conversation immediately. I would like to be as discrete as possible for you, since we’re speaking about such sensitive matters. And Spike?”

Spike blinked.

“There’s no need to be embarrassed about anything. I’ve helped dozens of stallions to get the look they want, or enhance the look that they have. Every creature should have the right to feel completely comfortable about themselves in every way. And I’m grateful that I can help you as you become more comfortable with yourself.”

Spike nodded.

“Alright then, with that preamble out of the way, can you tell me a little history about what you’re looking for and why, and how I may be of assistance?”

Spike breathed in and out. “Well, I guess the short answer is that I umm… would like to be more masculine.”

Rarity nodded.

“And… well… I found out that dragons don’t actually reach sexual maturity for a century or so after their hatching.”

“A century!?” asked Rarity, her teacup had wobbled in her magic.

“Yeah,” sighed Spike. “And it’s nearly impossible to know what sex I’ll actually become. But I really, really, want to be male, even though I won’t know if I’m actually male or not for quite some time.

“There’s very few creatures alive right now I’ll ever… well… I’ll ever…” Spike’s eyes watered and he shook his head trying to shake that feeling away. “I won’t be having a family anytime soon, that’s all. I have a long life in front of me, it just won’t be with any creature I know personally right now.

Why was he bringing this up!? What was wrong with him? Rarity had set down her tea.

“And well…” Spike continued. “I think that’s why I’m looking into something that makes me more male. There’s a lot of things I can’t control. But I can at least fit in a lot more with the guys, even though there’s so much different about me.”

Spike felt himself plucked off the couch in Rarity’s magic as she embraced him completely. She felt so warm and kind and he was right to have a crush on her for so long.

“I’m glad you came in, Spike. I’m so sorry that you’re going through so much right now, that sounds like awful news.”

“It… it is,” Spike spoke softly, fortunately the brief moment his eyes had watered was gone.

“I think I can help with one of your problems though! Are you ready to dive in?”

Spike nodded.

“Alright darling, I am going to make you fabulous!” said Rarity, pulling out a magazine-like booklet and a notepad.

“Not too fabulous,” said Spike, thinking of the hot pink set he had tried on in Canterlot. “I’d like it to look natural.”

“Yes, nothing too flashy, I take it? What kind of set do you think is natural for a dragon to have?”

“Male dragons don’t have penises, or testicles. Well they do,” Spike quickly added. “But it’s all internal, even as adults. So… it’s not really something that exists at all.”

“Natural, but mythical,” said Rarity, putting a hoof to her muzzle.

“Yeah, if male dragons did have external genitals—if I had a set, I’d like it to look like that.”

“Hmm… this is an interesting design challenge then. I’ll tell you what Spike, let me get some measurements, some photos, and then we’ll ideate together this time tomorrow, does that sound okay?”

Spike sat back, “Photos?”

“Yes, I’m going to need good photos in order to compare and design this just right. And don’t worry, I have my own private photo lab that will handle all this with discretion.”

Spike nodded. “Oh! I almost forgot, Elegance in Canterlot gave me some measurements,”

Spike grabbed that paper out of his bag and handed it to Rarity.

“This will be very good to know. Though I’ll take some more measurements just to double check. Now, follow me.”

They made their way upstairs, the normal place that Rarity worked on dresses was the first door on the left. To Spike’s surprise she took him to a room on the right he had always assumed was some kind of supply closet. It was not.

“It’s not as big as the dress room, I’m afraid,” said Rarity as they entered her other workshop.

The wall was floor to ceiling full of little drawers of all kinds with labels on them like silicone, resin, filament, dyes of many colors, and more. A surprisingly accurate stallion and mare ponnequin was on one side of the room. As well as a large full scale mirror. And a bulletin board with many different pictures of pony genitals of all kinds thumbtacked onto it.

“Wow, Rarity,” said Spike. “I had no idea this was even here. Why do you keep this all a secret?”

“Oh! It’s not a secret, Spike. It’s just a secret to you… and most ponies. I try to be discreet about how I advertise my services as my clients prefer prudence as well. And the market for dresses is quite a lot more than custom sets. Now stand still and tall.”

She pointed a rather large camera at him, taking pictures from the front, and the side.

“Now, I’m going to be taking pictures where your genitals will most likely be, is that alright with you?”

“That’s fine,” said Spike, smiling. This was actually happening!

She took quite a few pictures with his legs open in various positions. When she was done she brought out a measuring tape and began measuring and writing down dozens of numbers. He was grateful he had cleaned thoroughly down there before coming over.

“What got you into making penises for ponies anyway?”

“I had had a client come in asking for a custom suit, and before his transition he was quite uncomfortable with all the clothing I had him try on. After a lot of questioning why, the root problem turned out to be that he didn’t feel like himself. So I looked into what I could and made him a custom set of stallion genitals, to wear at first.

“My work is a close approximation of what the ponies in question want. And after some time wearing them and confirming their new lifestyle, they may go on to get surgery to make things more official. Or they may wear my designs around the rest of their lives. Or just for special occasions. I’ve had clients of all kinds. I suspect that you’ll be the kind of client that will just want to wear this all the time?”

Spike thought about it, “yeah, surgery doesn’t sound the best for me. Especially since doctors in Equestria know nothing about dragon biology. And I still think the safest spot for my real organs is inside my body.”

“Really, you still would prefer internal, then why do you want these external ones so badly.”

“It sounds strange… but I want both. Mammalian testicles always look like such a target the way they dangle around, so I can see why dragons keep it all internal. But… when it’s internal there’s no way to signal to every creature else that I am male. And it’s just one more thing that makes me different.”

“I see,” said Rarity, who was rolling up the measuring tape as Spike back down. “You’ll certainly fit in with most Equestrians as mammals tend to dominate here. But will you have some explaining to do if you visit the dragon lands?”

“Couldn’t I just take it off beforehand when I go over there? Part of the reason I want this is so I can fit in. I’d like to be able to fit in with dragons too.”

“You need to be able to take it on and off at will, is that what I’m hearing?” asked Rarity, who was already scribbling that info down on her notepad.

“Ideally, yeah. I’m sure I’d wear it most of the time though.”

“Hmm… my adhesion spells and materials don’t work the best when you take it off and on all the time. What would you say to visiting me every time you need to visit the dragon lands or any other occasion you need to avoid wearing it?”

Spike rubbed his chin. “That should be doable.”

What was he thinking, he was going to wear it everywhere? Shopping? Canterlot? The castle? The school!? He shook his head. Tartarus yes everywhere!

“Excellent darling! Now, I have some homework for you to do before we meet tomorrow. I want you to thumb through this catalog and pick out any penises, sheaths, and scrotums that you think might be good fits for you. Most are very equine, but it might give you an idea of what you want.”

Spike stared at the magazine, “Are you sure this is what you want me to look through? A gardening magazine?”

“Open it up, darling.”

“Oh,” said Spike his eyes widening at the catalogue hidden inside.

“There’s also paper as well. I know you aren’t much of an artist, but if you feel inspired to try sketching some ideas based on your favorites, that may help.”

Spike blushed, imagining drawing dozens of penises on paper. “I don’t suppose you have something a little more fireproof? I don’t want to accidentally sneeze and send all this to Celestia.”

Rarity nodded, enveloping the magazine and papers in an azure glow. “You’re lucky I know this fire-proofing spell. I’ve been casting it on my dresses for only a few months now.”

“You enchant your dresses?”

“Well of course, I have quite the set of spells I run every dress through. I can’t prevent stains from forming, but I can at least offer some protection for a few days after purchase.”

“Wow Rarity, that’s amazing!” Spike knew Twilight and Starlight were good at magic, but had no idea that Rarity knew more than just levitation.

“Why thank you, Spike. Now, go on home and look though the catalog and I’ll see you in the morning.”

Spike spent most of his evening in his room with the catalog open, staring at penises and sheaths and scrotums of all kinds, and absolutely none of them felt quite like they belonged on his body.

Probably because he skewed a bit younger? No, he was twenty-two. He was a baby dragon but the age of an adult stallion who could already have responsibly fathered a foal or two.

The worries mostly came down to what size would lead to the least amount of reactions.

The more he thought about it, the more this whole thing would have to be gradual. He couldn't just walk outside with nothing down there one day and the next day completely out there. Could he?

Maybe the strategy to take would be to make a small set at first and work his way up to a bigger size. So... have about four sets of these? Maybe?

That seemed overly taxing on Rarity's time. How much would she charge this for him anyway?

Knowing Rarity, she'd probably be super generous and do it for free. But he couldn't take advantage of her generosity to the point of asking for four different packers to be exchanged every month or so, could he?

He did like the idea of the gradual transition. He could make it look like another part of dragon puberty.

Then again, his wings had magically formed within minutes—a quite bizarre turn of events all things considered. If dragons could grow wings in less than a few minutes, would anypony even bat an eye if he walked outside sporting a full set?

Ponies had mentioned the wings and congratulated him on them. There wasn't much to really congratulate on, it was just a natural biological process. Twilight had earned her wings, Spike just grew them because that's what dragons go through.

Spike gave a gentle flap of his wings. Did he really deserve them? Or any of his other limbs? How about being alive at all? Spike shook his head. He tried to avoid thinking that deep. Life wasn't about “deserving” anything. No creature deserved anything. But he was going to live life in a way that made him happy. And that was okay!

It was okay to be himself.

And it was okay to be male.

Spike flipped through a few more pages and wrote down a few page numbers of a few sheaths and scrotums that might be worth exploring.

Rarity ended up being too busy the next day to meet with Spike. A rather large order had come in that needed to be completed as soon as possible. So the soonest they could meet was two days from then. That worked out fine as Twilight had several errands for him to run anyway.

Before leaving, he searched through his things. He didn't have much in the way of clothing as like every creature in Ponyville he was nude most of the time. But he did have a pair of shorts he could wear.

It was a bit odd, wanting to wear clothes. But it may be a good alibi to use in the future. Why was Spike wearing shorts for two weeks? Afterwards he could say he was going through puberty.

Could he really say that!?

Okay, he had to keep his story straight. If anypony asked him about the shorts, while he was wearing the shorts, he could just say he liked them and wanted to wear them.

Ponyville was more “clothing-optional" than “clothing forbidden” after all. And Spike was sure some ponies wore clothes when they were dealing with any kind of problem down there.

So that would be the plan for today. And perhaps a few weeks from now when he was sporting a full set of masculinity, ponies might just think that Spike was growing a pair surreptitiously while his body adjusted.

That had to be a good route to take.

The next day as Spike showed Rarity a few pictures that may be worth exploring, he also mentioned various strategies for how to transition.

“Darling, you are thinking way too much about this. Yes, ponies pay attention, but most ponies are far, far more likely to be wrapped up in their own world to pay attention to your balls.”

Spike had brought up a few of his anxieties and plans up with Rarity when they met the next day. “I'm overthinking this?” said Spike, unusually wearing shorts as he had for the past day.

“Naturally, I'll pay the most attention to every little detail, of course. But for most ponies, design is mostly invisible. It's why this is such an intriguing challenge for me. Most of my work is about showing off all my fabric flourishes. But genitals themselves are relatively invisible all things considered. Just another part of the body like legs or wings.”

Spike frowned. Do ponies really not pay that much attention? Now that Spike thought about it, he was much lower in height than a lot of ponies so he saw way more underneath than a pony might.

“Don't give me that look, I know your masculinity is quite important to you, but if I do my job right most everypony else won't notice it. Things really will be okay.”

“But so many things could go wrong? How can it be okay?”

Rarity kept scribbling with marker on a sheet of plastic. “Okay Spike, list five things that could go wrong.”

“A random pony asks me why I have balls suddenly,” Spike began.

“Just say: ‘It's a dragon puberty thing.’ Or: ‘sorry, that's kind of personal and I'd rather not discuss it.’ You're under no obligation to answer questions like that.”

“I can just... not answer questions?”

“Of course darling, politicians do it all the time. And if I'm asked something embarrassing like my age, it's not like I'm going to answer the question. I can make up some sarcastic reply instead.”

Spike nodded. ”I guess that could be okay.”

“Yes indeed. Now come on over here, and let me hear your opinions.”

Rarity had gotten three of the pictures she had taken of him the other day and set them on a table. One was a straight on shot, then a three quarters view, and then a profile photo.

Then Rarity set down a transparent thin sheet of plastic on top, and started drawing on the three quarters view a few different sheaths and scrotum styles.

“Alright Spike, I’ve got a few ideas, but let me know what you think. I was thinking about not having a penis per se, but just the sheath. You are a young dragon after all and probably wouldn't have an erection all the time anyway. So how about just having a sheath?”

She overlaid a few different sheath ideas onto the photo of himself. And after a few minutes of back and forth, he had selected a nice attached sheath style that would stay firmly secured underneath his belly.

“Now how big do you want your testicles to be, darling?”

Spike watched as Rarity overlaid quite a few different sized scrotums.

“Probably smaller than the smallest option you have right now?”

Rarity drew out a very small set and looked at it. “Are you sure?”

“Yes?”

“Hmm… you’re not wanting these too small just because you don’t want ponies to notice, are you?”

Spike blushed, and after some hemming and hawing he eventually picked the medium sized set. Not too small to be unnoticeable, but large enough that their weight should be more comfortable than not.

“Now, onto texture, I'm thinking there's two possible routes to take: Scales or Smooth.”

“How could it be anything besides scales?” If he was going to have something down there attached to his scales then the set should blend in.

“Well, take a look at your wings, Spike.”

Spike unfurled a wing and Rarity examined them. “See this membrane your wings are made of? Yes there's some scales, but it is mostly smooth. You could have your scrotum mimic this wing membrane texture.”

“But, wouldn't that look kind of odd on my scales down there?”

“Not necessarily. Stallions have a thin coat of fur all over their body, except for their genitals.

There the skin is quite smooth and a little different than the rest of their body. If you're interested in a similar effect, I could have your genitals behave similarly and follow how your wing membrane looks.”

Spike hesitated. ”That actually makes a lot of sense.”

“It just depends on what you would be most comfortable with.”

Spike reached over to his wing and felt the stretchy, slightly fuzzy texture of the inside of his wing. Then he reached down, feeling the texture of his scales. Either could work, really.

“Can you draw out what a smooth versus scaly version might look like?”

Rarity nodded, quickly sketching the textures much faster than he expected. In a few minutes, he was swapping the two versions back and forth.

“Hmm… either could work, really,” Spike frowned.

“You don’t think you can decide?” asked Rarity.

Spike shrugged, “What do you think would work best?”

“Smooth, most definitely,” said Rarity.

“Why do you think that?”

“It’s the most natural. Most creatures have a different texture for their genitals than the rest of their body. So if it did match perfectly it would reversely draw more attention to it. So if your aim is for a natural look, the membrane texture of your wing is going to look the nicest.”

Spike didn’t quite know how to argue back against that, and Rarity did know design—he decided to just trust her on this one.

“Alright then darling, a few last questions so I’m completely ready for what you have in mind. I hope you don’t mind if I continue to be frank about all this. Would you like to be able to urinate out of your penis?”

“Naw, I got a cloaca that does all that. I don’t need my penis to do that.”

“Fair enough, and how sexually active do you plan on being with it?”

Spike had expected a question like this to come eventually. “Not at all, really. I won’t even have those feelings for several decades.”

“No urine connection, or sexual spells, that does simplify things by quite a lot,” muttered Rarity. “You’re not trying to give me less work because I’m doing this for free, right?”

Spike had meant to bring this up far sooner in the conversation. “No—no—no, I—uhh… actually how much does it cost?”

“Spike, you are a fantastic friend so there’s no way I could ever charge you for this. Though I do appreciate being asked,” she winked. “Are you absolutely sure you don’t want this to be more sexually functional?”

“Absolutely sure,” Spike said. He didn’t want to have to think about sex right now, or anytime in the next thirty years. Maybe sixty years? It all depended on whatever happened in the far future but it didn’t need to happen now.

Rarity narrowed her eyes at him. “If you say so, Spike. I’ll have to make a new set next time when you do want that.”

“That’s fine.”

“And with that out of the way… let me take some closer looks at your wings and then you can head out.”

She spent another 15 minutes looking over his wings inside and out, measuring, photographing, touching and gently stretching it with her magic. And after Rarity went over all the sketches one more time to be absolutely sure, Spike left out the front door of Carousel Boutique.