Snickers: On the Road

Snickers led his herd back into the Keep as guards dispersed and flew their own ways around the structure and out of sight. “Welcome back, your highness,” a mare said with a bow in greeting as he passed her, while Silver Spoon adjusted the bag containing their adornments on her back as they went.

Another mare bowed her head as he passed and his fillies moved beside him, giving stern disapproving looks to the mares that bowed and certainly looked him over. “How did they know you’re royalty?” Silver Spoon asked in a loud urgent whisper.

Diamond rolled her eyes. “Obviously somepony in the dining hall spilled the oats on this one. All we can do is roll with it, right, stud?”

Snickers smirked, remembering the past three hours of fun they’d had, followed by a nap and very thorough shower. “Yeah, whatever you say, alpha mare,” he said with a nuzzle to the pink filly. He inhaled her scent and remembered washing her with berry shampoo in the shower they’d shared.

Diamond tittered and kissed the top of his head. “You’re such a dork.” She moved forward some to stand beside him while Silver Spoon held back a little to his other side. They happily made their way up the ramp and into the Keep itself. Abruptly, a stallion announced their arrival loudly enough to be heard through most of the building.

“Now arriving, Prince Snickers and Ladies Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon to see our most honored Lord Lorde!” The foals’ ears pressed to their heads as they were announced and they glared at the stallion, who shrugged. “I apologize, your majesty, it’s my primary job.”

“Like, whatever! Can you not scream everytime we enter the building, or are you going to be a total… ugh!” Silver Spoon nickered in frustration at the stallion.

“Let’s just go to our friends and let them know the room isn’t big enough for all of us,” Snickers said.

The fillies giggled. “That’s not all that was too big for us,” Diamond said with a grin.

Snickers rolled his eyes. “I said not big enough, not so big it wouldn’t all fit in you.”

Diamond blushed brightly and looked at the stallion in the room, who held back his laugh poorly with a snort. “That’s too much information!”

“You didn’t seem to mind joking about it a few seconds ago.” Snickers replied, walking past her to the stairs.

“Hey, I… you… just… get over here!” Diamond stated and followed him, stopping him before the first step. She turned his head to face hers and she pressed her lips to his. “Stop being so… you!”

“Would you love me if I was anypony else?”

Diamond shook her head quickly. “That’s… not what I meant. I just mean… like…”

Silver Spoon hurried to catch up and walked past them, starting up the stairs. “You two kiss and talk, I wanna tell Cress all about what we did in front of everypony.” The other two gasped and started chasing the laughing gray filly, all knowing it wouldn’t be shared publicly.

Arriving at the door to the guest rooms Snickers knocked on the large door twice and waited almost a full minute before the latch clacked and the door swung open to show a very tired bat pony. “Oh, you’re back. I took a nap waiting for you… I’m glad the guards did their job and kept you safe. How was your,” she looked between the trio and noticed their matted fur and manes in need of care, “time alone?”

Diamond nodded. “Fine, we just spent some time shopping, that’s why we’re a little later than planned.”

Silver looked at Diamond. “Did we have a planned time to be back?”

Snickers moved to walk into the room and Cress stepped aside. “So, did we miss anything while we were out?”

“No. Gil’s being a jerk and made a little nest out of a bunch of extra blankets and cushions, Trixie’s planning some show to put on, Kiwe went to the basement to meet with some cooks to learn something new, and I’ve been resting from boredom.” She exclaimed as the fillies entered the room. Watching Silver slip past her with a bag of spoils from the shopping trip Diamond eluded to made Cress perk up as she said; “Cool, let me see what you bought!”

Before Silver could stop her, Cress had grabbed the bag in her teeth and only meant to pull it. Instead the gray filly jerked away sending the bags contents tumbling onto the floor. Cress let the bag fall and looked at the veils and obvious accessories before she snerked and looked into Silver’s trembling eyes. “It’s cool, I won’t tell what everypony already knows.”

“What do you mean they already know?” Diamond asked as Silver moved as quickly as she could to repack the aromatic cloth and veils.

“Trixie and Gil could tell from gallops away and Cress saw you flirting before you chose to leave in such a rush,” Trixie announced from a room further into their suite.

“And I could smell you fillies getting aroused from another room,” Gil added. “Grossed me out.”

Snickers sighed and shook his head as he walked deeper into the suite and found the largest room designated as theirs by their saddlebags being tossed onto the bed in a pile. “Great, no secrets among friends, huh?”

Cress pulled Diamond aside before she could follow Snickers and Silver into their room. “Come here, I have to tell you something.” Diamond followed the other filly to the main room and they huddled close. “I’m sharing a room with Gil!” Cress said with a quiet squeal. Diamond grinned and clopped her hooves on the floor.

“Does that mean he’s letting you in finally?”

Cress hesitated. “Well, no. He just offered it to me because he trusts me to watch the egg while he’s out doing stuff… but it’s a step closer, right?”

Diamond nodded. “Yeah, maybe he’s just testing you, seeing how well you can be around Kiwe’s egg before you have your own.” She giggled.

Cress’s ears drooped a little. “Well… I don’t know about that, but maybe we could have a little fun, like you did today.”

“Oh,” Diamond elbowed the black filly in the chest, “you just want him for sex?”

“Sp… uh… n-no! I want more than that… but, well, I can’t say it wouldn’t be a bad thing, would it?”

Diamond shrugged. “I dunno. I heard from a good source that the griffin race have tiny penises compared to ponies, but they go at it a dozen times a day when they get going. Can you keep up with that kind of activity?”

Cress blushed and nodded. “For him, I think I could manage a little soreness to be with him as a special somepony. But, you have to tell me… how’s Snickers?”

The fillies giggled and shared glances at the rooms while they gossipped.

…

Snickers took a moment to separate his bags from the others, then laid them on the floor and opened one of the pouches. He began pulling everything from it and marveled at how much crap he’d gathered. “Why was I collecting sticks again?”

“You thought they looked like swords, or something coltish.” Silver replied as she lay on the bed, getting used to it.

Snickers pulled out some snacks he set aside, a couple books, then noticed the enchanted book he’d been gifted to communicate with Rarity. His heart ached for a moment, then he set it aside a little more carefully with the others. If I can’t use it to talk to mom, then maybe I should get rid of it. He thought.

He reached in and didn’t feel anything, so he tipped the pouch over and only crumbs came out. He moved the bag around and opened the other pouch to do the same and found more food bars, snacks wrapped tightly in closed bags, and the last thing he expected. He cocked his head at the little robotic toy he’d made with Twilight.

“I forgot all about you,” Snickers said and set it on the floor standing up. He patted its head but it didn’t turn on. “Must need new batteries, I’ll look for some later.” He set it aside and reached in again to find his nearly empty bag of Equestrian bits. “Huh, I’m still saving these for a rainy day. Hm,” he said and looked outside at the sky through the window. “Silver, do you think it’ll rain soon?”

“I dunno,” she replied, looking out the window, “it only rained once when we were traveling between Seldem and here.”

“Yeah, and your enchanted necklace kept you dry through most of it,” Snickers groused as he pulled out a green bag with dozens of local coins in it. “Lordecoin, I can’t believe he named a currency after himself; so arrogant and selfish.”

“If you could name a coin after yourself, what would it be called?” Silver asked.

“Not Snickers-coin, that’s for sure.”

Silver giggled. “Yeah. Hey, what’s that?” She asked, pointing to the toy pony.

“A toy Twilight and I came up with. When it’s powered up it’s practically alive, but we need new batteries, or a unicorn that can charge it up.”

“We have Trixie,” Silver suggested.

Snickers shrugged. “If you wanna ask her, go for it. I’m kinda over her ‘great and powerful’ routine, though.”

Silver giggled. “Thanks again for earlier, you’re the only great and powerful I need in my life.”

Snickers smiled up at her and took the pony toy in his mouth and got up to place it on the bed near Silver. “You bet. I think we’re both feeling better after that.”

“Both you and me, or you and Aquelis?”

“All the above. He likes mares because of you, now.”

Silver snorted. “He likes my butthole, not mares… but it wasn’t bad. I get what my moms had to say about it, but it’s hard to explain.”

Snickers cringed a little. “Don’t explain it to me, not yet. I’m a giver, not a taker.”

“Don’t be such a prude, sweetie,” Silver said, “it’s not that bad and when you try it, you’ll surely like it more than I do.”

“Can we just talk about the toy?”

Silver giggled into a forehoof. “Am I embarrassing you? Awe, you’re cute when you’re flustered. Okay, I’ll look at the toy, you go back to digging through your bags.”

Snickers returned to his previous position and began rooting through his bags finding them nearly empty now while Silver played with the toy, making it hop around her other leg as she started a little adventure for it to go on.

…

“...” Diamond opened her mouth several times, unsure of what to say as her mind tried to start thinking after what she’d accidentally been told by Cress. “So…”

“Yeah, don’t say it out loud,” Cress pleaded. “Forget I said anything.”

“B-but… you’re-”

“Shh! I can’t let anypony know, it’s part of my cover… and partly why I’m so attracted to Gil, maybe.”

“But everything-”

“I know! It’s part of what the spell hides. Look, can we just pretend I didn’t let slip one of my secrets?”

Diamond narrowed her eyes. “What else are you hiding?”

“Nothing as big as what I just told you. By order of Princess Luna, I hest thee to not speaketh of this again.” Cress said, sitting taller. “And to not bring it up again, ever.”

“What about Snickers? He should be able to see through your illusion.”

“This isn’t a spell, it’s an enchantment, her highness wasn’t happy to learn about that power. And you were just ordered to do something.”

“Can I see the real you?” Diamond asked, hopefully.

“N-no! This is the real me… as a filly.”

“But-” Diamond started furrowing her brow.

“I won’t talk about it anymore, ever. So, should we go back to your herd and see how they’re settling in?” Cress asked, a slight blush fading from her cheeks.

Diamond wasn’t ready to let the topic go, but she knew she wasn’t dealing with just a stubborn filly anymore. She stood up and turned around to face the hallway before she quietly took the lead of the two to meet her lovers. Once in the room she saw Silver playing with a metallic looking toy on the bed while Snickers was organizing into piles the contents of his saddlebags.

“So, what’re my loves up to?”

Silver placed the toy between her forelegs. “I’m playing and Snickers is organizing.”

“Cool, are there any more toys?” Diamond asked, a little hopefully.

“There’s gotta be some somewhere, I mean, this is a suite, not a business office, right?” Snickers offered. “I’ll go look while you two chat, okay?”

“Oh, no you don’t,” Diamond said as Snickers got up. “We’re not leaving you alone so you can freak out again. Besides, we haven’t been apart in almost a month, are you saying you wanna start now?”

Snickers rolled his eyes. “I think I’ll be okay going to the next room, and I didn’t freak out when I went to the bathroom in the hotel room, did I?”

“Well, no; but if you feel like you’re gonna panic, just call for me or Silver, okay?”

Silver picked up the toy in her lips and started having it bounce over her forelegs while Snickers waved off Diamond’s concerns. “I’ll be fine, just wait here and I’ll see what we have for toys in this place.”

Snickers left the room and went to the first open door where Gil was laying on a pile of cushions reading a small book. “Hey, are there any toys in here?”

Gil looked up from the book before shaking his head. “Nah, nothing in here but us.” He patted the egg gently and pointed to the wall. “Check with the filly in the next room, she might have some hidden away somewhere.”

Snickers was about to ask where Cress could have hidden some toys, but ignored it and left the gryphon to read. He crossed the hall and knocked on the closed door. “Trixie, are there any toys in there we can play with?”

“Trixie is unpacking and has nothing foals should play with… gah!” There was a quiet boom and coughing, gray smoke rolled from under the door and Snickers ignored the mare after that.

Going into the main living area, Snickers saw Cress sitting on a cushion facing a blank wall. “Hey, what’s up? Everything okay?”

Cress shrugged. “You’re practically a stallion, what would it take for you to notice a mare?”

Snickers blinked at her, then cleared his throat. “Well, not that I’m not flattered, but I think two mares is enough for me right now. I mean, if you really want to join our herd-”

“I’m not talking about that!” Cress snapped. “I mean… oh, nevermind. What are you doing here; shouldn’t you be with your herd, planning settling down and having little babies to carry on your name?”

Snickers snorted. “You’re in a bad mood, I take it. I’ll leave you alone.”

“No, wait, sorry,” Cress said, turning to face him. “I haven’t had much luck in the romance department since before we left Canterlot and Equestria, so I’m just a bit pent up and frustrated, I guess. We can’t all have hotel rooms to release our problems out in, can we?”

“You know, it’s still ours for a couple days, on the bank’s dime. If you want to use it you can.”

Cress shook her head. “Nah, there’s a bathroom here I can use, if I really need to. Besides…”

“It’s about your crush on Gil, isn’t it?” Snickers asked.

Cress’s eyes widened, then she sighed. “Is it that obvious?”

“I could see it from the moon. Why don’t you just hit on him, or ask him outright? Gryphons like that kind of bluntness.”

“Because,” Cress practically whined, “he doesn’t like mares. He keeps telling me over and over, so I might as well beat my head against a brick wall at this point. Why do I have to like him?”

Snickers shrugged and walked beside her. “Maybe you’re just meant to be the first mare he likes. Maybe you’re the one meant to show him how great mares are compared to hens. I know I prefer mares now that I’ve gone native,” he smirked. “C’mon, you’re a thestral, you don’t give up without a fight, right?”

Cress smiled. “You’re the first pony to call me that in a long time.”

“Well, I read it in a book, but I heard bat pony is the proper term.”

“You’re kind of right, but we call each other thestrals since bat pony is kinda derogatory. You don’t hear pegasi being called bird ponies, do you?”

Snickers’s eyes widened slowly. “Wow, I never realized I was racist about that. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry, it’s just something that we accept. It’s easier to be accepted by ponies when you have pony in your tribe’s name than not.”

Snickers nodded. “The xenophobia is strong with ponies, so I’ve seen.”

“What’s that mean?” Cress asked.

“It means afraid of anything that isn’t your kind. It’s something humans don’t have to deal with back where I’m from very often; like meeting my first cow here was a shocker. I mean, I drink the milk of a creature that talks to me; it’s just weird.”

“You know a lot of ponies sell pony milk, too, right? Mostly to and for foals, like you.”

Snickers nearly gagged. “Yeah, right. Like m- Rarity would…” he went silent as he thought back to how much milk she’d been giving him and how he now couldn’t be sure. “Okay, ew. I’m a big colt, I don’t need pony milk!”

“That’s what a foal would say,” Cress giggled and shifted her wings. “Anyways, shouldn’t you see what your herd is up to?”

“Wait, where’s Kiwe, again?”

“In the kitchens, or something. Don’t worry about him, he knows how to handle himself.”

“Okay, if anything happens, let me know. I’m going to see my mares.” Snickers said. He gave Cress a smile and nod as he left her and went back to the farthest room, passing rooms as he went. “Hey, what’s going on?” He asked when he got back.

“Snickers, we need to talk about what happened after we were done.”

Snickers looked between the fillies and then frowned a little. “No, it’s not important, I told you that.”

Diamond and Silver shared a look and they both got off the bed to approach their stallion.