SCP #2666

While walking in the woods one day, Anon and Incognito saw something strange: a little bouncing pony who liked to laugh and play. They followed their new prancing friend, not knowing where this adventure might end. Her pink bubbly butt disappeared just around the bend.

"Where are we going?" Anon asked.

"I dunno." Replied Incognito.

"Then how are we gonna get there?"

Incognito laughs, "Just follow the ho!"

And that's how they ended up in tiny horse land surrounded by black suited ponies. "This is fucking stupid," Anon grouses, "We just got fucking Isekai'd into some kind of after school special about doing horse drugs."

"You mean ketamine?"

Anon giggled, "Nah, like fuckin' Flintstones vitamins or some shit, look at this." Anon picks up a nearby dog-pony-thing. It was about the size of a St. Bernard. It was vaguely horse shaped, though the faces were wrong and they could move in weird ways that animals shouldn't be able to. The dog-pony-thing, or DPT curled up in Anon's arms much like a docile dog or cat.

Anon absently petted the DPT as the other DPTs around them went nuts, running around and talking to each other in something that sounded almost like a human language but with more whinnying, snorting, and other horsy noises added in.

Eventually a couple of the DPTs brought out spears and threatened Anon who gently put the DPT in his arms on the ground. Then he booped one of the threatening DPTs on the nose, making its face scrunch up and having it back away. "You're such a dick, Anon." Incognito said as the pair started booping every DPT they could.

Chaos ensued as the two humans went on a booping spree that would go down in the S.M.I.L.E. books as one of the worst disasters of all time: Classification: Ouchy Boo Boo.

Pretend for a second that you're Agents Sweetie Drops and Heartstrings. The pair of you had been called down to the middle of Whitetail Woods by the agency to deal with "a pair of huge, dangerous anomalous entities." Now the two of you watch as most of the present field agents fertilize their collective fields as one of the anomalies - the green one - picks up the senior agent in charge and cradles him to its chest. You can stop pretending now.

"It got Alpha Hoof! We're all gonna die!"

"Tell my mares I love them!"

"The horror, the horror!"

Lyra remarks to Bon Bon, "I didn't know Sigma was related to the Flower sisters."

Bon Bon facefrogs, "I don't think she is. Hey! Grab some prodders and poke it until it puts Alpha down you nincompoops!"

Minutes later Alpha Hoof is resting with an applejuice box in his hoof, looking like he'd just woken up from the best sleep in his life. "I... I don't know what happened..."

After a moment the poor, sweet stallion continued, "Have you ever been in Princess Celestia's presence?" Some agents nodded while others shook their heads, "It's... warm. You feel like you're back in your foalhood home with the whole herd around you. Like nothing can hurt you, nothing can go wrong. but it's more than that."

Alpha blushed, "Having those big, strong arms around me, being held against that burly chest... I mean, I'm no more gay than the next stallion but if I hadn't been so relaxed I would have popped out of me sheath faster than you can say 'Princess Cadence's tight juicy ass.'"

"What should we do, sir?"

"This is to big for us, call in Containment."

Be Incognito Aggot, older brother to one Anonymous F. Aggot. Be stuck in tiny weird horse land after following the hot-pink-ass-that-should-not-be-on-a-horse-thing. Now you and your younger brother are being herded (heh) into a pitch black train in the middle of the night. You hoped that these weren't Nazi horses, that would suck.

It had taken a couple hours but you were pretty sure that you had established some basic communication. They understood nodding and shaking your head, and in this way you had gotten some food (a couple apples) and water (really good shit, better than bottled even).

They had tried to separate you and Anon at first but you were having none of that shit and after a thorough scolding they hadn't tried again. Heck, you were both given your own personal cuddle buddy after that. Looking down at the... mare? In your arms puts a smile on your face. She's so soft and cuddly and after a little kicking and fussing to get into a good position the settled down for pets.

She was talking in weird horse language to her green friend that Anon was petting (colour coordination for the win!).

"Uhh, bro? I think this one might be in heat or something?"

You raised an eyebrow at him.

"She's kinda humping my arm, dude."

The two of you look at each other for a minute. "Dude, wanna fuck a dog pony?"

"You sick fuck, I'm in."

You think for a moment, "But they're pretty smart... Is this rape?"

Anon shrugs, "I dunno, you're the cryptozoologist."

"Well, when in doubt, whip it out."

Lyra was relaxed, calm, hot, bothered, and her nose was full of musk as this fucking STALLION unleashes his thick cock into the air. She knows what she has to do. She must slob on that knob until a glob fills her throat. It's the only logical next step.

"Lyra," Bon Bon tries to sound admonishing even as she tries to stop her eyes from rolling back into her head, "D-don't fuck the anomaly. Th-that's... That's... Oh fuck please Celestia fuck me you goddamn incubus!"

And so they did.

"Fuck, this ho is tight, dude."

"Tell me about it brother, I think this bitch started cumming the second I got my whole dick in. Fuck."

"Oh Celestia how are they still going‽" Bon Bon screamed as her fourth orgasm wracked her body.

"I don't know but I don't think I can go back to pansy arsed stallions anymore, FUCK!" Lyra squirted like a geyser all over the green anomaly's crotch.

"He's getting bigger!" Lyra's eyes nearly popped out of her skull as she is suddenly filled with the warm, satisfying feeling of thick foal batter filling her Easy Bake OvenTM, the feeling pushing her so far over the edge she actually blacked out for a couple seconds.

When she came to Lyra was laying on the floor of the train car next to her best friend Bon Bon. "Thish ish tha besht ashignment evaaaaaaar!" Lyra slurred.

Blind Justice is a class C3 security officer in charge of the D-Mares in the intake ward. These were really the lowest of the low of the D-Mare population. Serial hug stealers. Royal cake eaters. Even the infamous Baltimare Bandit who had struck THREE whole stallions and REFUSED TO APPOLOGISE! Most of the D-Mares only lasted a few months before they needed to be Terminated (having their memory of working for Containment erased -except for the fear so that they'd remember hating being there- and being transferred to a proper rehabilitation clinic).

A shaking D-Mare opened the train's sliding door to reveal a scene of terror. A pair of alien stallions in the most lewd of clothes that covered nearly their entire body stood over a pair of mares that smelled like had been worked over by an entire herd of pleasure stallions.

The D-Mares start to panic but Justice know what to do. She keeps her voice strong and level in spite of the fear churning her guts. "Get all four of them into individual containment chambers! Move it you cunt lappers!"

"Yo, I think these bitches are trying to steal our new fleshlights!"

"Can't be having that."

"Boop the snoot?"

"Boop that fuckin' snoot brother."

"Containment breach! Containment breach! Anomalies designated twentysix sixtysix dash one and two are performing some sort of cognitohazardous ritual that's paralyzing my D-class! Be advised, the ritual is performed by viciously attacking a mare's snoot!"

"We read you Blind Justice, be advised, we're sending in Tactical Response Team Friendship, get yourself and as many of your D-Mares out of there as possible."

"Well, now they're running away."

"Yo, bro! They got beds in this trailer!"

"Sweet! I could use a nap after dumping my load. Wanna stick with the current set or do you wanna trade fleshlights?"

"Eww, you sick freak. I like the way you think, but I like candy ass, her noises are cuter."

"Pshaw, greenie here comes with a nifty little narwal horn, convenient for picking teeth and carving tallies into our prison cell."

"Eh, mine's thicc-er."

"Ugh, I heard the double C's."

"Damn right you did."

"Wait, gimme a second, I wanna do something." Anon picked up both of the Dog-Horse-Things and tossed them onto what was going to be Incognito's bed and then jumped onto his own with a *pomf.*

"What are we gonna do on the bed, Onii-chan?"

Incognito laughed at his brother's bullshit, "The same thing we do every night Anon-kun, try to take over horse world!"

The Mane Six walked in slow motion into the station, all of them wearing cool black body suits and sunglasses with ear pieces as a pair of doors slowly opened in front of them like that once scene in Monster's Inc. Their HUGE and sexy chest fluff hidden behind the metal, shield shaped chest pieces that clearly displayed the symbol of the organization, three arrows pointing inwards through a circle. Underneath are three simple words.

SECURE

CONTAIN

PONE

Their entrance was completely missed by the anomalies who appeared to be inside one of the larger transportation cells singing and doing a little dance.

"Darn." Twilight Sparkle says coolly, as befitting the main character. She takes off her sunglasses to reveal a smaller, cooler pair of sunglasses.

"I-I'm sure we'll be able to do the cool entrance next time Twilight." Fluttershy says shyly because that's her only character trait.

"It doesn't matter to me (it did), I'm sure we looked cool (she isn't sure at all)" Rainbow Dash said, also coolly, because she was too cool to think of a new way to say things after Twilight stole her thing of boing cool.

"These... What were they called? Anomalies? Well, they're very fashion forward and exceptionally lewd. Using bottom coverings to lewdly hide their genitals, and are those socks I see? No wonder these terrible creatures absolutely stuffed miss Heartstrings and agent Drops with their seed, they're clearly some sort of lust spirit!" Rarity expressed, because simply 'saying' things is so last season.

"And I'm Pinkie Pie!" Pinkie said randomly because that's her only character trai- wait I already did this joke... What if I just have Pinkie break the forth wall all the time? Overdone? Well... shit.

"If you're all done muggin' for the camera we actually have a job to do." Applejack, as the only mare with a brain in her skull, tried to get everypony back on track. It didn't work.

"Hey! That's Nonny and Coggy! They aren't dangerous, well, unless you're a sandwich!"

"Y'all know these two?"

"Nope!"

"Then I'ma ignore that."

"That's reasonable." Pinkie pronked up to the Transportation Containment Unit and pressed the button that dropped the clear plasteel cover, trapping the two anomalies and two mares inside.