SCP #2666

Be Anon on a normal day in tiny horse land. The 'day' starts when you awaken and extricate yourself from the cuddle puddle tm. You sidestep the Rubik's cube that Purple Hoers cunningly set on the dining table and go get breakfast. It's just buttered toast but the cuddle puddle will awaken to its smell not matter how exhausted they are after the pre-sleepy-time fuck-fest that occurs in your room every night except on Mondays because FUCK Mondays.

Little fucking orange cat motherfucker had the right of it. Not that your 'job' was all that difficult, just mess around with ponies all day. Today you think you're going to see how these little marshmallow horses react to the lords prayer. Your mama tried her best to indoctrinate you into her cult of flaming bush worshipping hippies but you were so far above that shit that you'd actually met the sun god of tiny horses.

Also you might be a sex demon, and that's rad.

Nito's not up yet, - like usual - the lazy bastard, so it's up to you to brave the 'front door'. You use the term door loosely, since it's more like a giant metal hatch that hisses like a fucking sci-fi movie when it opens. They know you're up of course, what with the fact that one wall of each room is clear glass that looks out into the even bigger metal box that the metal box that is your apartment is inside of.

SparkleBottomJeans is there - as usual - along with Blue Fast and The Great and Terrible Loudmouth. You couldn't understand what they were saying but you were pretty good at reading horse faces at this point. Purp was excited, Blue was bored, and darker blue was wearing a fucking wizard hat was smug. You knew their names, but their names were stupid so you gave them better ones.

You assert dominance by ruffling their hair... manes, whatever. Blue tries to suck your dick since you didn't bother putting clothes on but she's on company time so Purple slaps her upside the head with a wing.

With a series of pictograms Sparklebutt indicates she wants you and Smug to do a couple magic tricks, kinda like a contest. Sure, why not.

Haughty pants (who doesn't wear pants) starts things off with a little light show. No reaction from the crowd (of two).

You do the trick where it looks like you're pulling off the tip of your thumb. The crowd goes wild. Smug's not so smug now, looks kinda pissed actually. She apparently pulls out the big guns by cutting Blue in half. Pretty cool actually, Blue's legs still wiggled and everything. You clap politely and Smug takes a bow.

Pulling a dime from your pocket (for some reason there's always 87 cents in your 'pocket' regardless of the fact that you're naked right now) and show it to the three of them. Putting your hands behind your back you slip it between two of your fingers.

Showing them your 'empty' hands you then reach behind Smug's ear a 'pull' the dime out. Checkmate. Uproarious applause. Smug is looking sad but Blue is laughing and Purple is scribbling furiously.

Smug's been a good sport so you smack her in the face with your flaccid dick. Her pupils dilate, her mouth hangs open, already dripping drool, and a quiet splash is heard from behind her. "Good girl, now you go have some fun." You say, ruffling her hair again before turning back to the apartment. You could go for a glass of milk right about now.

Trixie stumbled out of the chamber on shaking hooves, her eyes darting around for the nearest dick with legs. There weren't any, since stallions weren't allowed within one hundred paces of this chamber.

"Ugh, did he have to do that? Now we've gotta keep her for observation before we can wipe her and send her back to Starlight." Dash whined.

Twilight giggled giddily, "You know how Dash Two is, always so generous with his... gifts."

"Ugh, hate that name, just call him Nonners like Pinkie does, Twilight."

"That is not his designation. We must remain aloof from the subjects of our study lest our personal feelings get in the way of research."

"Uh-huh, you're so~ aloof whenever Cogs decides to give you a tummy rub."

"Th-That's off the clock!" Twilight kindly opens the door to the conjugal room for Trixie and the smell of sweaty stallions lures the lust drunk mare into the chamber of delights.

"Oh, so you being eyes deep in his ass every chance you get doesn't count?"

"For science! For Science!"

"Sure, sure, I bet there are pages and pages about what you find in there. Sonnets even."

"How the heck do you even know what a sonnet is?"

"Daring Do and The Amazonian Stallions."

"......... Which part did you like best?"

"Hooves down it was when Thick Spear destroyed Daring Do's butthole. Why, what was your favorite part?"

".......... The dinner scene......."

Rainbow Dash shivered, "L-lewd."

"I know, right‽" Twilight wiped her mouth, "It was just, like, bang, right there in your face and I was like, 'oh, hello new scene what do you have for - oh holy BUCK.'"

"Darn, Twilight, I dunno if you're kinky or a patrician."

"I'll have you know that I'm a gentlemare of the highest quality."

"Uh-huh, you were studying the blade while I was having sex?"

"Lick my clit, Dash, I know you the kinds of stallions you get with."

"Flock off the end of my dock, Sparkle, it's totally fine if a stallion has a little experience before marriage nowadays."

"A little? I'm surprised Thunderlane's dick isn't a prune since it's constantly swimming in mares."

Rainbow Dash just snorted and walked off. And during her slow (for Dash) walk out of the facility she was... evaluating some of her life choices. Namely the ones that revolved around colts and how she may or may not have been sleeping with sloots and ONLY sloots...

But she shouldn't think about that. She was the awesomest pegasus in Ponyville, no, in the whole freaking WORLD! All she needed to do was flap her wings and show the colts the tuft and she'd be up to her neck in dick faster than anyone could BLINK!

So what if the last couple colts that she had tagged and shagged weren't the some of the most... wholesome of specimens. She could get anypony in this town if she wanted!

Heck, she was so dang awesome that she could even get these freaky sex gods if she wanted! Yeah! Nonners plowed mares by the dozen, but Rainbow Danger Dash was gonna take him solo! Then everypony in SCP would know who the big tuffed badflank mare was!

But how to get him alone...