A real human bean
And a real asshole
Load Full StoryHistory can be split up into two specific eras.
Before full brain virtual reality, and after full brain virtual reality. Looking back I can't quite figure out why I didn't see it coming. There were numerous discussions about it by leading companies and well known figures on mainstream sites. They spoke of how close the technology was to being commercially available for years, how it would change everything.
One day it was either a tool to help people with neurological disorders or a stupid gimmick to make people see fuzzy objects floating around while feeling vague emotions. The next day it was everything and everyone. It had parallels to the internet, it began with very little attention paid to it, then one day it had became the norm for people to spend a good portion of their lives online.
So with the internet was with the brain sims. Most people would spend as much time as possible laying in their bed with a helmet of wires plugged into their pc. From the outside they looked to be sleeping, but they could be anywhere they wanted, feeling anything, being anything, doing anything, provided someone had laid out all the code at least. You didn't even need an expensive pc, that old laptop you used at work to type into word documents has more than enough processing power.
You'd think it'd be demanding on a computer to simulate an entire world perfectly, but in reality they were merely used to load up and store the sims. The brain was what actually did all the heavy lifting, it just received instructions on what to lift and how to lift it.
All of this naturally became a very big problem. Why live in the real world when you can be in an accurate facsimile of literal heaven 24/7 experiencing more happiness then all humans combined with an entirely convincing partner who loved you more than anything else in the world? Why do drugs when you can just simulate something an infinite times more potent then meth by just downloading a sketchy file and lying back in bed?
Thankfully I avoided all that shit and stuck to online military sims, fencing, racing, general guy stuff. When I got a little lonely I did dabble in the isekai type sims which allowed you to simply tick a box and any character you wanted would fall in love with you at first sight. Those nerd communities churned out an outrageous amount of high quality stuff in record times, fucking your fictional waifu was a pretty good motivator for work it turned out.
I used to be a part of said communities, even trying my hand at making an AI waifu myself once. But slowly I saw what was happening to my country, to the world and especially to the people I knew. They didn't live in reality anymore because they hated it, they didn't care about it anymore.
It was a vicious cycle, the more people stopped caring about the real world, the worse of a job people would do at maintaining its beauty, which in turn forced even more to sims. Every time I went outside I'd see less people and more trash. The cafe I used to work out went out of business since taste buds can be entirely simulated, why bother with boring old real food.
Enough was enough. Everyone needed to understand these worlds weren't real. I have to get them back into reality. I need to get my job back, I want to see kids playing in the park. Your waifu isn't real! I want my friends and family to talk to me, I want my town to be beautiful again. I want the world to just go back to the way it was.
So that's how I found myself downloading the latest update to a simulation of my little pony with a malicious grin on my face. All these nerds work put into making the most adorable, intelligent, lore-friendly ponies was going to bite them in the ass once I spammed their forums with mind captures of me absolutely destroying them.
But it wouldn't hurt to have a little fun on the way, would it? Going in with the power of god himself would get boring very quickly, as I had learnt from other sims. I needed to be immersed in a challenge while simultaneously completing what I set out to do.
How could a normal man go about killing magical ponies who could teleport, fly, cast an immeasurable number of spells and speak to each other, without cheating? Upon loading up the sim all you started with was whatever you set as a universal default for clothing, what else could you possibly need in a friendly simulation of Equestria after all...
I clicked around the folder containing all my sims and copy pasted some data from a shooting range simulator I enjoyed and slapped it onto the lines of code dedicated to what the player would bring with him into Equestria.
I take a moment to stare at the list of equipment showing mass and volume for everything. I click a weight value and go to hit delete before stopping myself. No, I'm going to rub it in those brony's faces, I'm doing it all with every setting realistic and they'll know I did so when they experience the mind capture.
Fourty kilos, wow. I might end up shedding weight on my trek into ponyville, since the player starts near fluttershy's house in the ever free forest. I wasn't sure why so many MLP sims had this as a starting location, I probably wasn't familiar enough with the fandom to know anyway.
I lean back in my neglected racing chair I used to play normal video games on before the world went to shit. Looking over the sim's official map of Equestria I considered how I'd go about this. I'd spent some time in the sim myself a month or so ago, mostly just trying to escape into a happier world like everyone else.
I know the walk from the forest to Fluttershy was about five minutes, it was pretty obvious where to go with a trail leading you there. From the cabin Ponyville was close by. I never actually took the time to travel to Canterlot but apparently every important location was pre-rendered, which I'm sure took a lot of effort to accomplish. The project was ongoing but a lot of the space in between was vaguely generated based on where in the world you were.
Every MLP sim disagreed with each other on many things, especially on the distances between locations. Thankfully for me the most popular sim had a shorter distance to Canterlot of twenty two kilometers. With about three liters of water I knew I could hike that in an afternoon.
My legs would hurt and my shoulders would complain, but I would get there. The question was would I be able to push through Ponyville without being seriously wounded and then continue to travel up to Canterlot on foot without being molested by either supernatural wildlife or Pony guards? Seems like a stretch to me.
Maybe once I'm done with Ponyville I should go south west and follow the train line toward Appleloosa. That'd be four or five days trekking meaning I'd need to bring some food to keep up my energy. I could theoretically ambush trains as I move my way down, shutting down the entire south's main transportation north.
But once again I'm dealing with an enemy who has access to magic and flight, how quickly would I be tracked down? I don't want to walk for days only to be stunned, thrown into the dungeons and forced to exit the sim with about an hour of my real time wasted.
Oh well, the answer to all these questions lay on the nightstand next to my bed, may as well just go ahead and try it. Moving onto a different tab I start the mind capture software, once I come out of the sim a file would be made that others could activate like a sim and experience everything I did through my body.
I take a deep breath and flop down into bed, picking up the helmet and hovering it just over my head.
"Alright Aiden, let's show these morons their isekai world isn't real"
I'm lying down on grass, above me a blue sky spattered with rolling clouds and a soft sun shine down onto the Ever Free forest around me. It's a tranquil field of bird songs and rustling leaves in the wind. Instead of the grass being damp, scratchy or itchy it feels dissimilar to a cottony field of pillows. I gaze upon the strange clouds that looked like they were performing a dance for all to enjoy and the sun wasn't hurting my eyes like it did in the real world.
A content smile creeps up my face involuntarily, those nerds did a good job, I have to admit. I take a breath and push myself up to sit cross legged. I look down to see if my memory serves me correct on what I'm working with.
Multicam Crye clothes camouflaged my arms and legs. A tan and green spray painted AR was slung over a plate carrier adorned with three magazine pouches at the bottom, each with two pmags each. Another two mags were attached to either side of the plate in front of my armpits.
I knew from memory that the plates were ceramic and rated to stop five armor penetrating 7.62x54r rounds. I furrow my eyebrows at that, I wonder if ballistic armor will do anything to stop magic? Depends entirely on how strong it is in this sim specifically I suppose.
This ballistic helmet-headset combo is going to make my neck hurt and my head sweaty, I can already tell. I can't take off the helmet without getting rid of my hearing protection though.
On the right side of my belt a berretta m9a3 with a rmr sight was ready to be drawn if I had a catastrophic failure with my primary or if I was forced into grappling. Well, seeing as I'm fighting opponents who don't have hands I don't think we'll be getting into a grapple. A small knife on the left side of my belt would aid me if that happened... somehow.
I pull a decently sized pack off my back and onto the grass in front of me. It held two thousand rounds of m855a1 rounds in their packaging along with 90 rounds of subsonic in a side pocket. Against my back lie a three liter hydration bladder, the tube allows me to drink without taking off my pack and grabbing a bottle. I frown at my packs insufficient contents.
"Ah this range kit doesn't have food or enough water, looks like I'm not going south west this time" I mumble into the warm air while staring through the ground between my crossed legs. My vision refocuses on the AR in front of me. It's barrel is 12.5 inches with a surefire RC2 suppressor, EOtech optic with a 3x magnifier and a 60 round magpul drum.
I'm going to have a lot of overheating issues very quickly with a barrel this short and thin. I'm locked into one of two strategies: Fire slowly from around three hundred meters away or hit and run. But this isn't the real world and I'm here for reactions, so we're just going in there.
With that revelation I stand up on my boots, sweeping my head left and right showed the clearing was smaller then I remembered it being. Instead of a field it was more like a place where six or so trees didn't grow letting light through the canopy.
A trickle of anxiety filtered through me as I considered what else the update changed in the few months since I'd been here. Shaking my head to flick away those pointless feelings I train my eyes on an obvious dirt trail and set off toward what I hope is Fluttershy's cabin.
Upon exiting the clearing the forest became a little louder as the sound didn't escape out into the sky as easily. Within the slightly alien cacophony of animal calls I could make out possible threats. A distant roar of a manticore to my right, a howl of a timber wolf to my left and something making an odd crashing, skittering sound as it travelled over the canopy where I couldn't see it. That was worrying.
I swear the forest wasn't this sketchy last time. As I trudge along the trail I pull back the charging handle on my AR enough to see it's loaded. Slapping the forward assist made sure it entered battery properly before I flicked the dust cover closed. Keeping up my checks I let the AR hang across my chest before pulling out my sidearm and peeking into the chamber, confirming it's loaded and the hammer in double action.
I move my thumb onto the safety of the AR so if some crazy monster jumps out of a bush to eat me I can quickly use the 45 throw safety to flick to full auto. That wouldn't happen in a brony isekai sim though, right? At least I don't think it would, this whole update threw me through a loop and I'm not entirely sure what the hell I'm doing.
After a few minutes of slowly turning around in circles while walking to keep an eye on my surroundings I spot something bright red through some leaves. This has to be it. I quicken my pace and crouch down just a little bit in trepidation, shouldering my rifle at low ready. As I get past the tree blocking my view of the red thing, I see it's the top of a small birdhouse attached to a tree branch with a few other brightly colored houses like it in varying sizes.
I move up to the next tree across the trail from the birdhouses and peak around the bend in the path. There's a tree partially blocking my view but a few dozen meters away stands a strange looking cabin with leaves making up a dome roof with a few glassless windows poking out. This is Fluttershy's cabin, but it was definitely changed from my last visit, yet more fuel upon the flame of anxiety.
It looked to still be two floors tall, I hope they've made the roof higher lest I have to bend over once inside again. On and around the cabin stand another few dozen birdhouses, each with colorful roofs. Inside most are nest material and colorful birds sticking their heads out into the day, chirping away fervently. The creepy ambience of the forest was gone, replaced with a melodic song of hundreds of birds in harmony.
Birds in the real world couldn't sound that beautiful, the realization steals my awe and reminds me why I'm here. How do I approach this? Is she even in there? Surely she is, this is a simulation, why would the developers not want the player to find ponies asap? Wasting rounds isn't an issue but alerting Ponyville to my presence this early will make things more difficult.
Although I have subsonic rounds, will they be able to penetrate the wooden walls with enough power left to incapacitate? If it doesn't then she'll have the time to flee out the back and fly off to warn others. For the mind capture it'd be better if I went in anyway.
With my mind made up I tried my best to emerge around the bend and casually stroll up to the little bridge that went over a creek. I'd never done something like this before, I mean sure I've shot thousands of people in sims, but they were either hostile AI or other players who were playing against me. To shoot a friendly AI, even one I had confided in during a dark moment of loneliness not all that-
Knock knock knock
My eyes go wide with shock as I focus back in on reality. I hadn't realized I'd already walked up to the door and alerted my presence. I quickly move my right foot back, shouldering my rifle and looking through the reticle at the door. My hands are shaking a bit but it wouldn't matter at this distance.
A high pitched voice came through the door. "I'm coming!" Holy shit am I doing this? I'm not sure anymore, I don't want to become a sociopath. But she's not real it's just my computer CPU spinning up code and letting it run its course. My moral deliberation was cut short by the door swinging inward to reveal Fluttershy.
I watched her expression through my optic, first it was happy, then it flashed between curious and nervous. Her voice was wavering as it cut through the silence. "C-can I help you?" My right finger contracted onto the trigger, I braced for a round of m855a1 to go through her head. Nothing happened. I pulled again and realized the safety was on. I'm a fucking moron, a stupid fucking idiot. I'll be editing this out of the capture afterward.
My expression must've soured because the pony reacted. "I'm sorry, I-I'll go now..." She sounded dejected as she turned to close the door. I shot my head back and pulled the rifle down to my torso with a confused expression on my face. She's sorry about what?
My voice came out croaky at first but sounded normal after clearing my throat. "What're you sorry for? You didn't do anything wrong" Her ears were drooping as she scuffed the floor with her hoof, apparently preferring not to maintain eye contact as she replied.
"Oh, I th-thought I did something... wrong. I'm sorry" Her downtrodden tone made my heart hurt a little. I take my right hand of the rifle and step forward. "No really Fluttershy it's fine, you shouldn't feel bad. I was just angry at myself for being an idiot" At first I wanted to reassure the pony, but then I realized I had accidentally used her name without any explanation as to how I knew it.
Apparently Fluttershy didn't realize my error. She looked back up at me, her cute voice surprisingly steadfast. "You're not an idiot, why would you call yourself that? Come inside, you can have a hot drink" Without another word she turns around and trots into the cabin, leaving me to consider what just happened.
I came here to shoot her, but I know her. I've been here once before and Fluttershy... she really helped me. I don't want to see her lifeless corpse clatter to the floor as her pets cry out against me. That's just... an image I don't want to think about. I don't think I care if she's not real, it feels so real in the moment.
I step forward through the doorway and look around her cabin. It's mostly how I remember it, although it seems like some furniture has been shuffled around after the update. Just a quaint room with a fireplace, a few chairs and the occasional fluffy animal lying on pillows.
"Do you want some tea?" Fluttershy stands by the fireplace, ready to boil some water in one of the few pots strewn about. Okay.
"Uh, yeah I'll have some tea, sure" I move across the room slightly bent over from the low roof, making my way toward a wooden chair with green cushioning. Running along parts of the walls are little stairs with holes leading out through the walls so some kind of small animal could move around. Wouldn't that be an issue in bad storms or winter? Never mind, magic.
I turn around and plant myself in the very low down chair, it creaks and groans a little from my weight but it doesn't threaten to break. Looking back over to the fireplace I can see steam emerging from a pot hanging in the fireplace from a wire. Hold on, there's no fire. How is it boiling? Oh right, magic. Not sure why it needs to be over a fire in that case. Aesthetics?
Fluttershy slowly walks over to me with a cup of tea balanced on a hoof. She smiles as she hands it to me. "Here you go"
"Thanks" Should I say more than that? She makes her way to the couch to my right, lying down on it with her legs tucked up beneath her body like a cat. I take a sip of the hot liquid, it tastes okay but what little experience I actually have with tea casts doubt on that opinion.
Fluttershy clears her throat to speak. "So what's your name? O-Oh I'm Fluttershy by the way" She managed to blush through her fur after stuttering out her name, really lives up to the name doesn't she.
"Aiden, nice to meet you Fluttershy. I was just ah, passing through on my way to Ponyville" I winced a little at that last part. I came here for a reason, but I could just skip over Fluttershy right? Just this one time? It's a trial run.
She seemed to perk up at the mention of the small town. "Oh, Ponyville's a nice town. If you have the time you should speak to Twilight, I think she would be happy to see you since you're uh, quite, um, interesting..." Her chipper tone waivered toward the end as her eyes took in everything I wore. I wonder what she thinks it is, military, cultural, religious even?
Twilight would be pretty interested in me and my equipment, funny to think how she'd react. The mania in which people portray Twilight's first interaction with a Human varies wildly from interest to near breakdown. Seeing as this sim is the top one though, it would make sense for her to be more on the tame side.
I took another sip of the hot, leafy tasting tea before cupping it back in my hands. "I'm the first of my kind here, if you weren't aware. I'll go talk to her first thing. I didn't exactly have anything specific planned anyway" I had something very specific planned.
Fluttershy's nervous examination of my apparel transformed into a beam of adorable energy, amplifying the guilty of what I almost did to her. "Yay! I'll come with you too, I haven't seen Twilight in a while and I'm sure she'll want to talk to interview me too" She finished her sentence with a warm giggle.
Oh shit. "Uhhhhhhhhh. Could you um, not come with me? Sorry but I'm not good with uh..." What the fuck do I say. What the fuck do I say. Her happy expression became crestfallen as she went back into her staring at the ground and poking at it with a hoof mode. I'm sorry Fluttershy but you can't see what I'll do. Well you can because you won't remember it when I reset the sim but... god damn it.
Opting to get it over and done with to avoid these painful emotions I stand up suddenly, hitting my head against the roof with a dull thud. My neck hurt a little but the helmet took most of the force, little awkward though. I realized I hadn't finished the tea in my hands, I gulped it down all at once burning my throat eliciting strange eyebrow undulations of pain. With that I placed the cup a little too roughly on the table between us, causing Fluttershy to wince from the noise.
"Thank you for the tea and your hospitality Fluttershy, I really do appreciate it. Goodbye" My words were a little too rushed and with a curt wave I did my best to leave the cabin without looking back. I opened the door, stepped out, closed the door without looking and took multiple gaping breaths. I must have been holding my breath at the end there without realizing.
I looked at the ground and shook my head in dismay. "This wasn't fun like I thought it would be" This mind capture would no doubt be deleted. With a sigh I put my hand back on the grip of my rifle and continued ever onward. "We can still get some practice in against Ponyville, turn this into a fucking fine art" I whispered to my boots as they moved over the little bridge.
The birds, despite my emotional maelstrom kept singing their pretty song, but it didn't cheer me up. It just reminded me of the fact I was lying on my bed with a stupid looking helmet on my head as the world was left to rot, all in favor of places like these and AI like her.
I was long out of the forest by now, only normal animal sounds could be heard instead of whatever semi-lovecraftian monster might be lurking under some unturned rock. As I spun around to look ahead again I spotted a grey pony with an orange mane walking down the path toward me. It was still a decent ways off but I could still tell it was a unicorn looking down at its front hooves as it walked.
Unicorn means magic, magic means a massive threat. It could be capable of anything, killing me instantly wouldn't be difficult when you can summon fireballs or telefrag. Would this be my first kill? Would it even matter if ponies heard the shots? They don't know what gunshots are, they'd just think it's someone using magic or some monster in the distance snapping trees or something.
It was still a ways off so I quickly took off my pack, pulled back the charging handle to clear out the supersonic round before sliding in a single subsonic one. I pocketed the spare round before slinging my pack back on. By the time I was done the lone unicorn was only a dozen meters away, but it had stopped and was now staring at me with an intense look of apprehension.
It was a cute little guy, at least I think it's a guy? I'm not all that good at telling the sex of ponies believe it or not. These ponies were clearly designed to look as cute as possible with their small frames and cartoony faces, alas this makes their horns no less dangerous.
I put on a fake smile and try to sound friendly even with the moderate distance between us. "Why hello there pony, Is this the way to Ponyv-" As I spoke I casually raised my rifle as if it were an everyday occurrence and a part of my sentence, looked down the optic, landed the reticle on the top of the ponies anxious face, remembered to turn off the safety and squeezed the trigger back.
Tshk. Thud.
My left eyebrow raised. "Huh" Turns out unicorns can't use magic to stop your bullets if they didn't know you were going to shoot bullets. Neat. Since the round had such little power it didn't peel his head like a crushed watermelon, instead just creating a 5.56 millimeter entry wound and a much bigger exit wound.
I curiously watched the blood pool up and out of the back of the unicorns head where he fell face first into the ground, legs half underneath his barrel and half splayed across the path. Subsonic rounds didn't have the pressure required to cycle the action of the AR, therefore I had to manually pull the charging handle back, pull the loose round from my pocket and drop that in the chamber before releasing the charging handle, sending the round flying forward into battery.
A very stereotypical pool of red was now expanding from the unicorn, you'd really be surprised how much blood is inside you. I wonder what that unicorn's name was or if it had kids or something. Whatever it's just an AI. Even after telling myself this I felt a horrible void in my torso, a numbness spreading throughout my body.
Whistling a happy tune to fill the emptiness, I purposefully step into the pool of blood that now covered the entire path. It'd be really badass if I left bloody footprints behind me, that shits cool. I laughed, interrupting the tune and thinking about myself as a pony axe murderer with over the top thriller music, a young mare running away from me screaming.
I stopped doing circles to look for threats since you know, I am the threat. Man I should really bring frag grenades or claymores or a mortar or something next time. Something that explodes really. My eyes fell upon a clearing of the rapidly thinning forest as the dirt path turned to a stone road.
The mostly even surface was a welcome change, so too was the yellow colored roofs of the homes coming up before me. I see some colorful ponies milling about, talking in circles or walking toward what I assume is the city center? I dunno I never watched the show. It took the form of a circular building with multiple floors and balconies supported by many thin pillars. Reminds me of a carousel, looks like shit if I'm gonna be perfectly honest.
I'd been here once before but looking around I'm not sure if I could make out anything meaningfully different, although I was still a hundred meters away from actually entering the town really. I decided some close range recon wouldn't hurt so lied down on the road, using the mag as a bipod as I flipped over the magnifier.
I got a good view down the road, it wasn't overly busy as I could only count maybe fifteen ponies or so. Coming his direction from a bridge going over a river were three foals, they were so adorable I just want to adopt one and pet it. I'm not sure if they're chasing each other or just hurrying to get somewhere though.
They were going surprisingly fast, whipping past a pair of adults who voiced their annoyance at having three foals run between their legs. I laughed at that, but stopped as I saw them run past all the homes, heading toward me. Did they see me? No they'd be more hesitant with a weird creature. Although I am lying down so wasn't nearly as threatening.
The orange and pink one with wings who was leading the pack finally caught sight of the weird green, brown, tan and white thing lying in the middle of the road as it had abruptly slid on its hooves to a stop. This in turn caused the yellow and red earthie along with the white and purple unicorn to bowl over each other in a pile of fluff and laughter.
I pulled up from my cheekweld and leaned back a little to swing away the magnifier since they were so close. I paused for a moment considering just shooting them now, but I may as well entertain their curiosity first. They had sorted themselves out and were standing in a line staring at me like the grey unicorn did, although not with apprehension but with curiosity. As is youth.
I took my left hand off the handguard and waved it in a friendly gesture. This was apparently all they needed to validate them running up to me with babbling questions, talking over each other as they looked me over. I didn't like being surrounded is for sure.
With this I stood up, which elicited a response I could finally understand. "Yer' a big fella' aincha?" The funny southern accent came from the earth filly who look amazed at my height. Can't blame her, they barely came up to my knees.
"Did you come from the Everfree? Are you an evil monster? Can we slay you and get our monster slaying cutie marks!? PWEASEEE!" I shook my head in confusion at the assault of questions throw at me by the Pegasus. Apparently what she said they all agreed on as they sat on their haunches with large teary eyes, attempting to guilt me into, well... letting them slay me?
I put my left hand up to scratch my chin in exaggerated deep thought. "I am an evil monster from the Everfree, but I'm not sure if I want to be slain right now. But you can always get your I survived getting shot with sixty two grains moving at two thousand nine hundred feet per second cutie marks instead!" With this I crouched down and spread my arms out, looking between the fillies with a wide smile as if my offer was some fantastic deal.
The fillies sat in confused silence before the Pegasus, seemingly unfazed began clapping with her hooves while making an excited high pitched noise and gyrating side to side as if this were the most exciting thing she'd ever done.
Well, it would at the bare minimum be the last exciting thing she'd ever do. With that I shrug. "Ok then" I move my right foot back from the still celebrating Pegasus, shouldered the AR and didn't even aim since she was less than twenty centimeters away from the muzzle. The sound of hooves clopping together and meaningless baby babble was cut out by a-
TFFF.
Unlike the subsonic round, the supersonic round painted a good portion of the road red with stringy bits of... intestine? Lungs? It's abstract art don't complain. The other two fillies shrieked so loud I felt my headset lowering the volume of it, thank god for ear pro.
They both ran as fast as their stumpy little legs could take them back to the town where the other ponies were all looking their way, wearing what I could guess were yet more shocked faces. I took a knee and looked down the optic as I knew these shots were going to get really difficult really quickly.
I'd kicked the goddamn hornets nest and it was only a matter of time until an icicle went through my face. I wasn't looking forward to experiencing that with the pain limiters turned off, although with how numb I felt right now maybe it wouldn't be an issue.
My right elbow was resting on my right knee in a stable position I'd become accustomed to in my time camping corners in the more competitive shooter sims out there. I held my breath and tracked the filly with the southern accent as it sounded like an air raid siren screaming on four legs. A slow squeeze back, I took up the slop of the trigger, finding the crisp wall, made sure my optic was on center and pulled.
TFFF. Red mist, the distant screams grow louder.
Find new target in optic, center on target, reset trigger, take up the slop, find the wall, check target, pull.
TFFF. The round threw up some pebbles and dust as it skidded across the road, the round hit low. The final filly still went down, but it wasn't incapacitated. I think it's time we closed the distance. I stand up keeping the rifle shouldered, I opted to put more shots down range without worrying as much about accuracy.
I slowly walk toward the scattering groups of vibrantly colored ponies that skittered toward their homes and across the bridge. If they're going to the city center, there's probably guard over there. That's fine, I just need to keep an eye out for aggressive unicorns. I laid my optic on a purple Pegasus who was picking up the injured foal and flapping it's wings to take off. TFFF, TFFF, TFFF, TFFF, TFFF.
The pony rose a dozen meters before the rounds that hit took their affect and sent it back down to earth with a dull thud, the foal bouncing a few times as it cried out in distress. I swiveled my attention to the bridge but I was too late. I saw the final black butt of a pony raise over the construct and into the heart of Ponyville. I exhaled in annoyance.
"That's fine we got plenty more targets" I moved the rifle toward the home coming up on my left, I saw two ponies run in there as fast as they could, leaving behind the foals mind you. A wooden home with a stone foundation. Yeah nah, you're not stopping a single light armor penetrator buddy.
I flicked the rifle to automatic and dumped thirty odd rounds into the construct in broad strokes closer to the ground where they'd be lying down in cover, splinters of wood flying out in all directions. TFTFTFTFFTTFTFTFTTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTTFTFTFTFTTFFTFTF. After the sound of the chattering blasts died down my ear pro stopped dampening the audio and I could hear the remnants of a scream coming from the home.
They were in there alright. I unlatched the mag and peaked inside, still a solid twentyish rounds in there. With a click I pushed it back in as I walked over the sobbing form of the Unicorn foal, it painfully tries to look at my face but can only lift her head to see my legs. I hear her mumble out a pointless plea through her pain. "Celestia... please" I let gravity do most of the work for me, the boot landing with as much force as I could muster on the filly's head with a crunch.
Oh wow that's a lot of blood, wow. Maybe too much force honestly. Three cutie mark crusaders down, that'll piss some people off surely. I moved to the wooden door of the home and tested the doorknob. My brows furrowed as it actually turned, does this place not have locks or was this a trap?
I snickered at the idea of two terrified quadrupeds having the foresight to lure me into a scenario where they actually had the advantage. I kick the door in after having opened it a little, just felt way cooler that way, like a swat operator. A muffled yelp rang out from above me as it was suddenly cut off. I smile and call out for them as I quicken my pace up the stairs, my rifle at the ready. "Ponies, this is the guard! Are you okay!?" I hear another yelp but this time it transformed into words.
"Yes up here! I need help it's my brother he-" I locked eyes with the pony as I stomped up the steps. Oh yes. I'm not the guard. I'm not sure what was going through the mares head, but it seemed like she'd accepted her fate, simply lying under the bed with a dull look on her face. I'm happy to oblige and cut her digital suffering short, such a good guy I am. TFF. And control for the incapacitated stallion. TFF. Nice.
I ran back down the stairs and emerged back into the street. The sounds of screaming could still be heard but it was scattered and distant now. Ahh, I'm sure I'll be seeing guard once I cross that bridge. Or should I clear the homes around here first? Being in a pony's home would play to the strengths of my now heating CQB rifle. It would also guarantee the wizard ponies wouldn't blow up the house since I could just say I had hostages.
But of course that'd be a harsh scenario to escape, I'd be trapped. I weighed up my options but found myself jogging to the bridge subconsciously. My eyes flicked between the homes to my left and right but couldn't see any techno colored ponies staring out at me from windows, almost a relief to know they weren't quite that stupid.
I'd worked up a decent sweat now, most of it probably coming from the adrenaline. I haven't felt this engrossed in a scenario since I first started playing shooter sims, I've gotta do this more often!
I rapidly ascended the stone bridge and upon its apex found exactly what I expected to. It wasn't fully formed yet, not even close. But none the less a line of poorly armored guards holding spears in their mouths were forming up to protect the main part of Ponyville. I ducked down so only my eyes were exposed, quickly searching for a horn, none.
Well this would be easy. I stood up, the guards were about twenty five meters away, no way they'd reach me in time. Still on automatic, I shot a three round burst into the left most pony who quickly slumped into the stone floor. The rest reacted rapidly to my loud appearance as they charged toward me.
In response I held down the trigger and swept their line. Their armor did nothing to stop my rounds since you know, only ballistically rated steel can stop bullets, not normal blade stopping steel. There were about eight guards when I started shooting, when I ran through my eighteen rounds three still remained and they were coming in hot.
"Oh fuck!" I let the rifle swing down to my torso and pull out the Berretta, only having enough time to take a few steps back while incapacitating a single guard with five hasty shots before one collided with my plate, spear first. We both went to the ground in the one event I mocked ever occurring, a grapple with a goddamn pony.
The guard immediately reared up his left hoof to slam down on my face, I responded to this by vaguely shooting at his form with the sidearm close to the ground at my side while reaching for my knife with my left hand. I turned to look to the side so the brunt of the force would either hit the headset or my helmet. Apparently some of the rounds from my sidearm hit because the guard made a surprisingly deep, painful grunting noise as he hoof punched my helmet.
I felt my vision swim and my ears ring from the impact, but I wasn't unconscious. With my knife out I began stabbing the guards unarmored side as rapidly as I could, after half a dozen pokes I felt something enter the right side of my stomach. I looked down to see a spear handle jutting out of my stomach, seems I forgot about the other guy. Shit.
I went to get up but had to push the now incapacitated guard off of me in doing so. While attempting this the other guard kicked me in the back a few times, it shook my vision and clattered my teeth but the ceramic plate spread out the force evenly. I felt a faint buzz in my stomach where I knew blood would be gushing out of the spear wound, but the surprisingly intense amount of adrenaline in my system nullified the pain.
I whipped around on my knees and magdumped the final guard who could do little more than continue to kick me, which wasn't very effective compared to a gun. He stumbled a few steps back and forth apparently still looking to fight before it suddenly went limp and fell to the pavement with a now familiar thud.
I can't seem to control my beaten lungs and my head is foggy. I remember I need to reload my primary, I drop the knife and handgun, pulling out a thirty round pmag and slapping it into the magwell with a click, followed by another click as I depressed the bolt release with my thumb. I know from experience I'm going to drop dead within a few minutes. I turn back to the bridge expecting more guards, but none were charging me.
Instead motion in the sky caught my attention, I could see Pegasi far off in the sky circling above, some seemed to be getting bigger every second. I shouldered my rifle and began to do my job as an anti air turret. I focused on the ones that were seemingly charging me at that very second. I had no way of knowing if I was actually hitting my shots since even if they died they'd still be on a trajectory in my direction.
After spraying several shots into the four Pegasi coming down, I released the pmag then sloppily missed the magwell a few times before putting in a new one, keeping my eyes on the swarm above me all the while. Slowly I felt energy leaving me as the spear sticking out of my stomach pushed its way to the forefront of my mind. I have no time for it. I shouldered my rifle again aiming at the ones who were circling.
I open my eyes to see my pale yellow roof, the setting sun shining in through a dirty window. Unlike Equestria this sun stings my eyes as I squint and pull up my right arm to shield myself from it.
The exhale of disappointment came out in the form of a long expletive. "Fuuuuuuuck..." Well, that's what I should have expected. In real life and in sims alike, you're not going to feel it when someone shoots you in the brain, you're just alive one moment and dead the next.
I wonder how it happened though... Most likely a unicorn came over the bridge while I was distracted by the Pegasi, said unicorn would easily have the time to conjure up some arcane equivalent of a twelve gauge slug and send it right through my headset, probably.
But man that was... Fresh memories of what I had done flashed through my mind rapidly. I pulled the helmet off my head, moved onto my side and curled up into a ball. I don't like what I did, I shouldn't have done it. I feel numb, I feel like a monster. I killed those foals and those guards and the grey unicorn and the siblings under the bed.
But It's for a good reason! I didn't just do it because I enjoyed it... right?
I lay there like that for a while, going over everything I did in my head. The void inside me slowly fading into a heavy despair. I'm just one man, what can I do to change the world? I automatically squeeze my eyes as tightly shut as I possibly can to block out that thought. But it's true. There was some saying I'm forgetting... He who attempts to save everything, saves nothing.
Then what am I even living for? A yellow Pegasus, afraid but still welcoming fills my vision for an instant. I open my eyes, stinging a bit having slightly adapted to the darkness they were just in. I want to escape this world, go back into Equestria. But I'm cut in half. I'm meant to be fighting the abandonment of reality, yet I want to do so myself. Either way... I'm going back in.
With my motivation somewhat recaptured I swing my legs off the mattress and stumble over to the chair. Yep, just gonna delete that mind capture. I don't want to feel that way again.
"Ahhh... let's just think over what we learnt there. What did we do wrong?" My eyes trace lines around the fan lazily swinging above my head. My rifle was insufficient, but I was also overconfident. If I brought in an m249 with a belt linked into a backpack there's a good chance I wouldn't actually finish the belt before dying. I could also pump up the barrel mass and length to twenty eight inches so it takes a lot longer to overheat.
Suppressor would actually be mostly pointless seeing as we're getting really close up, not to mention it'd melt after I got about five hundred rounds into the eight hundred round belt.
I'm definitely not as familiar with belt fed's as I am mag fed's though. I'm sure it'll be fine. Oh and I wanted to bring frags and claymores, may as well put that shit all over my plate carrier.
Another big issue would be the Pegasi hitting me from above, what's the solution to small air targets? Birdshot. There's such a thing called an XRAIL which can extend a Mossberg 930's shell capacity to twenty three. That should do well on a sling.
With some typing of key terms and some clicking within a few drop down menus everything looked in order. I'll do much better this time. My cursor hovers over the reset sim button. If I wanted to, I could see what my actions did to Ponyville. I could find out how they would react to so many innocents dead. I feel that familiar lack of life creeping in.
I'm just one big contradiction and I'll always be one. A frustrated man who feels bad for his own fictional victims he wants to hurt. I let out a hissing sigh through clenched teeth and click reset, erasing that entire world permanently. Like it never happened.
A pause followed by a steadfast whisper. "Let's go"
Blue sky, beautiful clouds, warm sun. I know the drill already, getting up onto my feet. Instead of mags on my vest there's three M67 frag grenades and three claymores with a detonator that acted as a radio control switch for all three of them.
The machine gun resting against my torso is already cutting into my neck with it's sling a little with how heavy it is. I place my hands beneath it and heave it in front of my face before letting out a whistle. "You're a big fella' aincha?" I feel multiple emotions from what memory that sentence brings forth.
The gun is big though, a barrel that looks like it should be firing 7.62nato instead of 5.56nato towers out of the handguard for twenty eight inches, very front heavy. The large belt snakes its way out of the left side of the gun as it runs under my armpit and behind me into a backpack. On my right shoulder I feel the weight of the shotgun loaded with birdshot.
"Here we go again" I groan, looking up the dirt path leading out of the forest before me. My vision wavers however, when I see a surprisingly large pony standing at the edge of the little clearing I stood in. My eyes go wide at the sight of Celestia looking at me with an expression I can't read.
I freeze up, fear spreading out from my heart. This is wrong. This shouldn't be happening. I keep my eyes locked on her as she begins to walk toward me at a steady pace. NOPE.
I see a pale yellow roof above me as my bed feels far more comfortable than it ever has before. What the hell was that? Did those brony assholes make the sim randomly generate a new world every time it's reset? That has to be it, random introductions to Equestria.
One reset later and I'm transported to the clearing looking up to see the blue sky is gone. My heart skips a beat. White fur, gold crown. Blue, purple, teal and pink hair block out everything in my vision besides the two magenta eyes far too close to mine.
A pale yellow roof greets me once again. Back so soon, I can imagine it laughing at my cowardice from exiting the sim out of fear twice. Scared by a wall of code piloted by my own brain, I'm a goddamn moron... but.
I know this isn't right. I can feel it, like you're seeing something you weren't supposed too. I feel paralyzed in disbelief, digging my hands into the sides of my mattress. Does she know what I did? Is she just going to cast some torture spell on me as soon as I go back in? No, I'm going back in there as an immortal god who cannot feel pain, then she'll know how pathetic and meaningless her fictional existence really is to me.
I inject the information into the modded Equestria sim folder that does just that before resetting once again and going back in with a scowl adorning my face.
Pain, stabbing and searing my right leg. Instead of a blue sky I see blurry, blood stained stone pushed up against my face. How am I feeling pain? This isn't possible. I attempt to fly away with the powers I should now have in this sim, but all I can do is flail my limbs around and continue to shriek. I feel furry arms wrap around my body as a lurch brings me up into the air, my vision is too blurred by the unbearable pain from my leg to see what it is.
A scream fades in and out as I ascend. Loud popping sounds break through the ringing in my ears and I feel myself get dropped by whoever was carrying me. As I fall through the air I see blue then brown over and over as I spin rapidly back to earth. The screaming still hasn't ended and I can't exit the sim, it won't let me exit the fucking sim!
I call out for Celestia to stop, but I can't hear my words against the gale breaking up my body with wind. Suddenly I stop falling, I feel my right arm flare up with yet more horrid pain as it cracks under the force of the impact. I bounce a few times and land on my face looking at the blurry road again, my screaming dying down into pained whimpers. I know what's going on.
I hear the long drone of the rifle as it sends splinters of wood flying past me. My ears hurt almost as much as my broken limbs as the supersonic cracks pound my brain. Once the shooting stops I hear a scream from the home two ponies are hiding in. That'd be the stallion being hit, which means...
I move my neck as much as I can to face down the road. He's walking toward me with indifference written upon his face as he finishes checking his magazine. I can't exit the sim. I try to yell in defiance but all I manage is a pitiful plea. "Celestia... please" He's so tall, I don't have the control to look up at his expression anymore. He doesn't miss a stride as I watch my own blood red boot crash down toward my face.
I wake up hyperventilating and rolling out of bed. For the second time I fall to earth, my arms quickly investigating my limbs to make sure I'm unharmed. Tears roll down my face as I shake with adrenaline, my heart tearing, ripping and burning. I wipe the snot cascading down my face on my shirt as I shakily make my way to a bottle that contains all I need to forgot that hell.
Everything is so much quieter nowadays, even if it's night now, I can barely hear any engines moving down the highway. After computers and the internet, the streets of suburbia thinned out, but with the advent of sims they practically became barren. As I walk I'm forced to stay close to the road since most of the sidewalk is stacked up with uncollected litter and waste. It all just looks so grey, even the patchy weeds breaking through the concrete know the world is dying. I was the one meant to save it. I failed.
The bottle of liquor is taking it's sweet damn time to take effect, I need to keep moving and quickly forget what happened back there. I'm heading to a spot I go to every few days just before sunrise, it makes me feel less like a walking ghost. It's a bench setup on the edge of a steep hill overlooking the town, it always gave the perfect view of the sun as it showered the concrete jungle in orange light.
I'd always be happy to greet the same joggers and dog walkers here and there that came out just before the sun rose. I didn't know their names, but they fit into a routine and it was comforting to know the world went on without me. But as I turn the final corner, the rocky steps going up the hill don't show a sweaty woman in her mid 40's. She was supposed to be there with ear buds and bright orange shoes running down the stairs at a dangerous pace. She was stolen from her place on those stairs by some stupid fantasy world.
I'd never see her again. Why get all sweaty, tired and hot when you can do the same thing in a sim with no downsides? It would raise the runner's high to whole new levels as you sprint with endless energy across a beautiful beach, you'd never get a stitch and your feet would never get sore. The sun would never finish rising, spilling out pinks and reds over you with the feeling everything would be alright.
I chuckle at the thought of free happy emotions. Me drinking alcohol in the real world was so pointless now. Alcohol rapidly became a thing of the past, just as all drugs did. If I wanted to get drunk I'd just click a few buttons, put on the helmet plugged into my computer and I'd be drunk instantly. Shame you can't play with death and purposefully drink too much inside a sim, hoping against hope you'd pass out and never wake up.
How do we know our dreams are not the real world, and our supposedly waking lives aren't the dreams? That's a stupid question, of course dreams aren't the real world. I won't lie to myself and say the real world is better though, because it simply isn't. I'm a fucking hypocrite with my hatred of others for opting for fantasy over reality. I'm weak, I can't handle it.
That's why I'm out here now. Feels like a goodbye to the world I grew up in. Maybe it's just the alcohol, but I swear everything used to look so much more colorful. The grass beneath me is overgrown and dull from lack of maintenance. The so called flowerbeds have been invaded successfully by weeds and are now a testament to what has become of us all.
My feet stop moving as I realize I'd reached the bench. I look up and to my right, before me stretches yellow and white lights. They float and bob as if they sit upon a sea. In the distance red orbs of cell towers or industrial zones contrast the dull grey sky. No stars, I've never been far enough away from civilization for that. I've only ever seen the true night sky in sims.
So this was it then? I collapsed into the bench, sliding down onto my side. My life ends like everyone else's, nothing special, nothing that will change history, nothing that will be remembered. I'll just go home, vomit into the toilet and spend a few blissful months in other heavenly realities as my real body wastes away in my messy room, my family only meters away probably doing the same thing.
The sea of lights morph and quiver as tears distort the light coming into my eyes. Funny how the more distorted my vision becomes, the prettier the world is. It's all just one big metaphor isn't it? My lips part into a drawn out laugh at how it all comes full circle. And here I am, doing the same thing I'd done a hundred times, telling myself that this time I'd really do it. This time I was actually going to trap myself in there and be done with reality for good.
Despite the cloudy winter night my body feels pleasantly warm and tingly. I move to sit up but end up rolling onto the dead grass beneath the bench. I push myself up but put too much force into it and stumble back, falling down the hill and rolling at impossible speeds before colliding with someone's back fence. I get back up feeling no pain, everything's moving really quickly and time skips forward constantly.
I look up and I'm at the street corner, I take a step forward and I'm on the ground at the front door, I get back up and I'm slouched over my monitor trying to click something. All I can hear is a constant, ear-splitting drone of tinnitus. I blink and I'm laying on my side in bed, vomit sinking into the sheets and covering my face. I roll over and-A blue sky, inviting sun and dancing clouds.
My mind feels foggy, like everything is made of static electricity. It's nice not to have stomach acid stinging your throat, though. My eyes widen and I bolt up. "No, no, no, no, no. This isn't happening" I look around the clearing but Celestia isn't here. My clothing is nothing but a red t-shirt and khaki cargo pants, where's my stuff? I can't exit the sim, it's not working.
"I didn't actually do it, why would I want to be here again? I wouldn't have done it without making sure I was going in with full control though, surely" I try to think back on what I had been clicking on, but all my memories are blurry snippets and incomprehensible ideas, just a drug induced haze of despair and broken inhibitions.
I realize I'm hyperventilating, my hands quake as I shakily stand, feverishly looking around and around praying the sim teaches me another lesson, shows me this is just some sick joke. Anything to prove this isn't happening. I didn't get myself stuck here, I'm just in an alcohol induced fever dream. I'm not doomed, that didn't happen. I buckle over with my hands on my knees, retching from anxiety over and over with nothing coming out of my empty stomach.
I need to move, to leave. My legs are laid down in lead, I barely have the strength to move them forward. Every step is uncontrolled and floppy as I make my way down the dirt path. I hear things, but I can't process whatever it is as I'm too busy fighting the dread burning me alive with inane muttering.
"No it's just a joke virus in the latest update it's just they know I'm doing it and it triggered the response this is just..." I need to get to her, she'll know what to do. Celestia can fix it all, that's always how it works in these things. I'm not stuck in the sim forever, I'll get out. I didn't finally do it, not now.
My body feels strange, wrong. I don't know if it's because my real body is intoxicated or if It's just me freaking the fuck out. I stop, close my eyes and take the deepest breath I possibly can, hold it for five seconds, then slowly release it. The cacophony dies down little by little as I focus myself on just breathing.
I open my eyes, the world before me is not a source anxiety, nor dread, nor trepidation, nor adventure. I'm going to get out of here. I don't understand how they did it, but an AI within this sim can control my ability to leave as I experienced when I was turned into a foal. Said AI can trap me here, dooming my brain to rot away in the real world. But at the same time it must be able to get me back out.
"A quick shot to Canterlot and I swear to god I'm going to destroy that stupid helmet once I'm out of here, I'm never going into a sim again" With my mind set on this singular goal, I set forth with controlled steps and wary eyes. From memory it was around twenty five kilometers to Canterlot, I've rucked way further in sims. I absentmindedly pat down the pockets adorning my pants to find the expected amount of nothing.
With a glance down, it's a comfort to see I've been gifted with some hiking boots instead of something more urban oriented, that'll make future treks smoother. It's odd, but I can't remember ever setting these pieces of apparel as my default. Immediately upon discovering I could set items to go into any single player sim with, I opted to be equipped with the best infantry equipment available. Yet here I am with nothing but casual summer clothing as if the sim itself decided what I would bring in for me. Maybe I clicked something while drunk?
The strange sounds of the forest slowly fade out as the now familiar birds around Fluttershy's home sing just loud enough to be heard over the swaying branches and my own footfalls. If I somehow fuck this up and I get imprisoned, I can't just exit the sim. I could be sitting in a cell for months on end before my real body dies. My eyebrows shoot up as I follow this train of thought, ending up at the conclusion I must have been avoiding all along.
I am at the complete mercy of these ponies. I have no magic, I have no firearms nor even a simple blade. I stop walking just as I come to the bend in the path that would show the Pegasus ponie's home. Do I even want to do this? I'm jumping into the belly of the beast so to speak. Somehow my eyes open even wider and begin to water from the lack of blinking.
My voice comes out more rattled then I thought it would. "Does she remember?" The memories play through my mind, Celestia standing in front of me with a strange emotion on her face. Purple eyes mere centimeters from mine, gazing into my very soul. I blink a few times, my eyes screaming at me for depriving them of moisture.
I exhale, leaning against a tree to support the thoughts racing in my head. If Celestia remembers, she would have been on top of me the instant I was back here. No, she wouldn't risk 'my little ponies' just to fuck with me. But how do I know she doesn't have some kind of partial knowledge that's set off via my presence? My fingers rake lines into my scalp as my eyes trace ravines into the swaying grass beneath me.
Why would she let me go back home if I could return a risk to her ponies? But clearly it's the developers of the sim who are doing this, not an AI. But what other option do I have, who else could get me out of here? My left hand comes down to rub at the prickly stubble adorning my chin. Could I give her an incentive to let me out, maybe knowledge from Earth or a few hostages? I feel a little guilt build inside my chest, but I quickly squash it down with an annoyed grunt.
"No that wouldn't be morally wrong, these aren't even real people! They're literally not people to begin with, they're ponies. I can do whatever I want to them and it's just electrons running around four CPU cores" My reasoning makes sense to my brain, but my heart isn't entirely convinced. My eyes flit over to a birdhouse, the first one I saw last time with the red roof.
I chew on the inside of my mouth, eyes narrowing. A rainbow colored bird sticks its little head out of the front of the birdhouse, tweeting and chirping as it fills its role in the music coming from around the bend. I smile. I know exactly how we're going to get out of here.
I push off of the tree, carrying my momentum around the bend and toward Flutter's home. Just one question for you and I'm on my way. As I cross the little bridge I watch the birds, somewhat paranoid they'll detect evil in their presence, sounding out a warning resulting in a unicorn telefragging me. Thankfully that doesn't happen as three sharp cracks echo over the tweeting.
I step back, waiting for a very soft voice to respond. Furrowing my brows, I wait a little longer. I spin on my heels and move over to a window around the right side of the house, peering in I see everything looks normal on the inside. No Pegasus though. My confusion is audible in the form of a groaning sigh.
I shake my head vigorously and whisper an answer for the discrepancy. "Of course it's different, I reset the sim and things are randomly generated... wait, did I reset the sim?" Once again my heart betrays my satisfied brain as it trickles adrenaline throughout my bloodstream, anxiety creeping in with the plan already going off track.
With a little bit more vigor I go to cross the bridge, but standing on the other side of it is a very familiar looking grey unicorn. I forgot about this guy. I clear my throat, "How's it going? Seems like uh, Fluttershy isn't here right now" I try my best at a casual smile, but I don't think it turned out well.
The grey unicorn tilts his head, looks past me at Fluttershy's house, then back at my face. Does this guy think I did something bad? I take a few steps forward to close the awkwardly long distance between us, but the Unicorn opts to turn and run back into town as fast as he possibly could, making strangled sounds of horror all the way. A cartoonish dust clouds kicks up and follows his quadruped sprint down the path leading into Ponyville.
I grimace as I consider chasing after him to prevent a panic. That'll just look worse. With a huff I set off after the shrinking grey idiot, a grey idiot who I've killed before. The birds seemingly didn't care about the drama that unfolded before them as they continued with their merry choir. The tune danced across the air and faded back into the ambient sound of rustling leaves as the sight of buildings and stone roads became apparent further down the trail.
I force myself to keep a steady walking pace as my hands begin to shake a little. I scan the colorful blobs in the distance but I can't see anything that looks like a guard line yet. My head moves up to look into the sky, a half dozen Pegasi can be seen flying about, but none of them are circling in to attack like last time.
My jaw clenches, my knuckles go white, my knees tense up and fight against my advance. Just act natural. I feel like a robot as my boots strike stone, I refuse to notice the three shapes coming toward me. I don't see them, they're not there. The three colorful entities sit down ahead of me making noises I don't understand. I look down at my shoes and ignore the whining that starts up as I pass them.
My heart is punishing me with yet more adrenaline and anxiety. Every time the shrill voices hit my ears it feels as though my chest is about to explode. The orange thing enters my field of view as it trots backward in front of me, attempting to start a conversation. I close my eyes. I don't want them to think I'm a threat though, I have no choice but to speak to the colorful creatures.
I stop my march and I feel something crash into the back of my shins. I turn around to see Apple Bloom rubbing her nose with a pained expression.
"Coulda' given a warning you were gonna stop" I inhale, trying to maintain eye contact. My words come out jumbled and varied in tone and pitch.
"He-hello there I am looking for a-ah a an adult. Do you know where that place might be?" Sweetie Bell comes to sit next to her Earth pony friend with a confused expression on her face. I hear a squeal of laughter from beneath me. I look down to see Scootaloo rolling around my feet, apparently finding my failure at communication hilarious.
You enjoyed it when you killed them didn't you? I wince and look away from the laughing filly. Apple Bloom apparently picks up on my turmoil.
"What's wrong? You ain't lookin too good" Control yourself you fucking child. You have a mission, get yourself together and keep going. I snap my eyes back open, looking down at the cutie mark crusaders. Their expressions are mixed. Scootaloo is still smiling at my stupid question, Apple Bloom is wearing a mask of concern and Sweetie Bell is looking at me with wide eyes, body shivering. That's worrying, best I move on before she pops.
I lean down so I'm not towering over the foals and manage to keep my voice steady. "I'm just moving through Ponyville, do you know if there's somewhere I can get fireworks around here? I'm-uh, looking to go to a... party in Canterlot" Scootaloo jumps up as if she's trying to climb onto my back.
"Oh a party!? You should ask Pinkie Pie for party supplies she has everything you'll ever need!" As if a demonic summoning had been completed, air rushed past my face and a pink mass materialized in front of me. I leap back, making a very undignified sound of alarm and land on my ass. How can she do that if she's not a unicorn!?
"Did someone say Party? I can start a party right now! We can have a sunny weather party or a friendship party or a-" The pink menace's tirade is cut off by an exaggerated gasp. Just as I recover from my fall and look up at her, she disappears with a gust of wind as if she was never there to begin with. Okay then.
With a raised eyebrow and a murmur of ascent I get back on my feet and start heading into town. I hear a few huffs of exertion and the light clip clop of the three fillies catching up to my long strides. Pinkies gonna be hosting a party for me, this isn't bad. I can get in, get what I need then get out. With her weird powers maybe she can get me the next six ingredients as well.
My thoughts are interrupted by another girly tirade coming from one of the fillies. "Where are we going? Are we going to the party? Can we come to th-" I look behind me at the assaulting foal, the orange one.
"Stop talking! I'm just going to talk to Pinkie about something then head to the train station, that's it, okay?" I raise the pitch and stretch out the last part of the sentence in a fit of sarcastic contempt. Before they can reply I turn back to the town and pick up the pace to a fast walk. Being near these three isn't good for me.
Where the hell is the party going to be anyway? Wait, where's the train station? I turn my head left and right as I near the bridge leading to the heart of the town. The ponies around me look apprehensive at my entrance, but seeing me talk to the foals and Pinkie Pie has made them less horrified then the grey unicorn was, that's for sure.
I crest the stone bridge and I'm greeted by a line of guards forming to stop my advance, screams erupt as I raise my rifle and squeeze off three rounds into the left most pony. He falls limp against the stone floor, blood seeping away from his lifeless form. The other guards charge my position with spears held fo-"Hey new pony Let's go to the party I got everypony there well at least as many ponies as I could anyway but it's so good to meet you! What are you by the way I don't think I've seen somepony like you before but you're so cool!"
Pinkie bounces on the spot in front of me, trying to get her face as close to mine as possible without tackling me. I lean back as far as possible to get away from the deranged cocaine addict, the attempt is in vain however as she grabs onto my left arm and I immediately find myself in someone's home.
My eyes go wide as I spin around in circles trying to figure out how the fuck I got here. Was I just teleported? The room is dark but among the shapes of furniture I can clearly see the outlines of a few dozen ponies waiting to 'surprise' me. I scoff and amble to what seems like the center of the room, upon doing so the lights are switched on and my ears are assaulted.
"SURPRISE!!!!!" The horrific volume makes me wince, but there's nowhere to flee the ambush as I'm surrounded on all sides by cheering, giggling, smiling literal party animals. I feel like I've been dragged into a side quest against my will, like some kind of sick unskippable cut scene is playing out with no control allowed from myself. That thought does not help calm my nerves.
A few furry things jab into my body from different angles as ponies talk over each other in their introductions and questions of what I am exactly. Thankfully I'm taller then everyone so It's a short process to pick out Pinkie, she's busy laying out very unhealthy food upon a few tables. The unwashed horde of happy demons apparently don't care about the weird newcomer as much as the free cupcakes, I'm given some breathing room as they descend like raptors upon the sweet confections.
I wave my arms, trying to get Pinkie's attention as she spins a yarn and animatedly mimics something walking along on two legs to those stuffing their faces. I dodge a green Pegasus who seems a little too excited to meet me as I consciously stop myself from running out the front door.
Pushing through the hairy rainbow sea I lean down and get the attention of the first checkpoint in my mission to not die. "Hey Pinkie Pie, this an awesome welcoming party, thanks so much! But I need to get to Canterlot for a private party of my own and I was wondering if you uh, if I could get some fireworks for it?" Without a second thought the pink mare reached into her mane and pulled out half a dozen colorful firework rockets bound by string. Well that was easy.
Instead of a shitty fake smile, I can use a genuine one as I've got my first ingredient. I reach down and lift the bundle under my left arm. May as well push this all the way and see how far we can go with it. "Thanks so much Pinkie! Do you think I could ge-" I'm interrupted by a panting, purple mare sprinting into my leg. I look down, not bothering to hide the look of malice adorning my face. The purple mare turns out to be the venerable Twilight Sparkle herself, here to squeeze out any tiny morsel of information about me she can for hours on end.
I try to shoot her down before she can ask the question, but she talks over me. "W-wow! It's true you're a totally new species! C-can I ask some quick questions about you and your culture!?" A quill and notepad appear from her saddlebags as she studies my body, already writing things.
I roll my eyes, my body deflating. Just give me a single minute to myself. I finish my aggravated antics and lean down nice and close to her sweaty face, her cheeks somehow blushing through her fur. My lips brush up against her ear, breathing in I prepare my scientifically relevant information of which she will be blessed to document in her shitty notes.
"No" I lean back up, watching as her face transformed from shocked to depressed. Her floating quill and notepad slowly move their way back into her bags as she stares at the floor. I sigh, "Unless..." She perks up, looking up at my eyes with hope bringing her back to life.
"Yes!?" She's standing on the edge of her hooves, trying her best to get closer to me. This might be our literal ticket out of here, this pony has the connections I need to get to Celestia.
"In my culture there's some uh, gifts that need to be given before such questions can be answered. I need a lighter, some string, some flammable liquid and six metal pipes with threaded caps that have a small hole going through the middle of them. Oh and a saddlebag" As I list out my requirements for scientific study her quill sounds as though it's writing more words then I'm actually saying, Twilight's face is a picture of focus, her eyes darting left to right.
I look over to Pinkie while Twilight figures out my request, but in her place is a chubby Unicorn floating what looks like an entire apple pie into her mouth. I'm actually impressed. She notices me staring and blushes before scampering off into the crowd, still chewing on the mouthful.
Twilight apparently finished documenting my every affect on reality as she decided she'd better respond. "Are those things normal to be gifted for information in your culture then?... Oh I didn't get your name, I'm Twilight Sparkle!" She looked at me expectantly as I considered what my name should be. Aiden isn't a very intimidating name. I let out a toothy grin as I considered the most appropriate historical figures to steal a name off. Ah.
"Nice to meet you Twilight, my name is Robert Oppenheimer and yes those items are pretty average for a uh, gift" My grin only grew wider as my new name was spoken aloud. Twilight's quill continued to write a thousand words a minute, her eyes seeming to study my teeth. Is she sketching the inside of my mouth? My lips seal and the purple menace whines, the noise joining the neverending cacophony of feminine conversation surrounding us on all sides.
"I was still studying your jaw, it looks like you have canines at the front, does that mean you um, do you e-eat m-m-m-" I cut off her stuttering. "Yes, I eat meat, I'm an omnivore. No I won't eat anything sentient" She lets out a reassured sigh at the epiphany that I apparently won't eat her. Although I wonder what magical, sentient pony tastes like?
Following me admitting I eat meat, I hear a few muffled gasps and the ponies who were clearly eavesdropping on our conversation shuffled away from us. I don't want to do this in such a populated environment, these ponies are going to get bad words about me into Canterlot before I even arrive there.
I stop glaring at the nervous faces of the ponies who were listening in on our conversation and turn back to Twilight. "We should do this at your place, it's too busy here" Without waiting for a reply I turn and weave my way through a few circles of ponies, a few of which with smears of chocolate or clusters of crumbs around their mouths. Is partying just an excuse to eat sweet food for these ponies?
"Wait are you leaving already!? You haven't even had a cupcake or played any party games yet!" The now familiar frantic tone of the pink pony cuts through the ambience of the room, causing conversations to die down as all the attention lands on me. That's not good.
I grimace and look down to see Pinkie sitting on her haunches, her hooves holding me in place and her eyes as large as she can possibly make them. Her bottom lip is quivering and she looks like she's about to cry. I face palm as I let out a sigh.
"Pinkie, I really appreciate the party, but I still need to get to Canterlot and before that Twilight needs to talk to me at her place. If you want I guess you can give me a cupcake for the road?" I return her pleading look with one of my own, alas she sheds a single tear at the prospect of my departure. She steps back, nodding at the floor.
"O-okay" Her response is interrupted partway by a hiccup. God all of these ponies are bipolar or something. Pinkie slowly reaches up into her mane and pulls out a rainbow frosted cupcake with a crude smiley face on it. My lips pull back a little in disgust at the prospect of a horse hair covered muffin, but as she holds it out for me it's amazingly pristine.
I glance around the room at the audience we've acquired in this little drama. The faces looking at me are varied in their emotions, but none of them are happy. Murmurs can be heard washing through the crowd, probably something like 'This horrible monster made the element of laughter cry!' Twilight is sitting and simply watching, her quill still scribbling away page after page of notes.Let's hope this doesn't bring up issues later on. I bring the cupcake up to my face, it smells of a whole bunch of stuff, vanilla, chocolate, apple, some kind of... spice?
Am I going to be forced to eat this in front of everyone, really? Looking back down at Pinkie, she's still staring at the floor, her mane somehow less puffy then it was prior. Looks like I have no choice, I somehow doubt this is poisoned anyway. I place the fireworks on the ground and use the now free hand to peel away the wrapping. Pinkie perks up, watching me as if I were a prophet recounting the word of God.
I bring the tan and rainbow confection up to my mouth and take a big bite, engulfing almost all of the downsized cupcake at once. As I chew, a lot of varied flavors make themselves apparent. It's like a battle for dominance in my mouth. You'd think such a wild mixture would taste like shit, but probably with the help of magic it turned out pretty damn good. A burning sensation creeps up from the bottom of my tongue, slowly tingling and spreading throughout my mouth.
A spicy cupcake, what an incredible prank, I'm in awe. Pinkie see's my changing expression and begins giggling maniacally like some super villain as they monologue their evil plans. My face begins to heat up, it's definitely pretty spicy, but unless it's still building up this isn't bad at all.
In fact, I'd go as far as to say I actually like this. I don't know why I would ever like a spicy, sweet cupcake, but this is a great combination of flavors and sensations. Pinkie is now doing a good imitation of Scootaloo, rolling around on the floor, kicking her legs around is if she was being electrocuted. I interrupt her with a contented hum of approval.
"Thanks for that Pinkie, this is a really good cupcake" I smile, rainbow frosting still hanging around my lips. This cuts the wannabe evil genius short as she stops spinning around and simply looks at me with a confused expression. With her plot foiled I pop the rest of the cake into my mouth, pocket the wrapper, put the fireworks back under my left arm and walk right out the door with a wave over my shoulder.
As soon as I step outside I hear conversations start back up with renewed energy at my apparent immunity to Pinkie's shenanigans. I look around me to find I have in fact traveled across the town, at least I think I did. Scratching my head I try and find the tree library, but it doesn't catch my eye.
Grumbling something about friendship fuckery I take a few steps out into the lightly populated street. The clip clop of hooves and the scraping of quill on parchment alerts me to the second checkpoint of my mission to not die. Her voice is distant as she walks ahead.
"Alright, the library is this way Robert" I stop myself from chuckling at the name as I fall into step beside her. As much of a terrifying situation I'm in, I've managed to stave off a mental breakdown for now. I don't feel like my entire body is tensed up and ready to run away from an angry unicorn anymore. A smug smile forms as I imagine Celestia's reaction to what I have planned.
Compared to the hellhole that is modern suburbia, this place is amazingly clean. I suppose you can thank magical cleaning spells for that, along with the lack of full brain virtual reality. I wonder if I can pull an inception and magically enter another world within the sim, then do it over and over until time slows to a crawl in the true world? What a clusterfuck of an idea.
As we move done the street, Twilight glances at me from the corner of her eye every so often before going back to scribbling. I'm surprised she's still going, how does she even have that much content to write about? I take the breathing room I've been given and lazily study the ponies around us.
Most ponies are looking at me, the adults are cautious but the young foals look ready to tackle me with a barrage of questions as they pester their parents to come up to me. Thankfully they remain firmly on their parents backs. That's weird now that I think about it, why would a pony put their child on their back? Aren't ponies able to walk immediately after they're born? It's probably just done because it looks cute, logic be damned.
There's no real residential and commercial divide, shops and stalls are littered down the street selling anything from magic tomes to apples. Quite a few apples for sale actually, I wonder if Applejack is the major exporter of apples for the rest of Equestria. My eyes linger on what looks like a blacksmith to our left. Inside I can see all manner of swords, spears, chainmail and what looks like crystal laden plate armor. Are the crystals enchanted with some defensive spell?
That sounds entirely invaluable, if I could be immune to a unicorn just picking me up and throwing me into the air I'd be infinitely safer. Of course, I have no money. I'm not sure if I should be sticking around to get some too, for all I know Celestia has magically sensed my presence and elite guard are on their way to capture me this very second.
Upon thinking of this scenario, four town guards trotted around a corner up ahead and are now coming straight for me. Their spears aren't held forward, but the right side of my stomach begins to tingle as the image of a blood soaked blade flashes in front of me. Twilight walks up ahead for a second before turning back to me with an inquisitive look. I didn't realize I stopped walking, but my legs don't want to go toward the armored quartet.
I've been in a thousand scarier scenarios before, but this isn't just a game anymore. If I die, I'm pretty sure I'm just going to go unconscious until my real body fades away. Twilight looks at the nearing guards then back to me, realization crossing her face as she figures out the situation.
"They aren't going to hurt you. I'll tell the guard ponies you're with me, okay?" Her voice is dissimilar to a tone you'd use to calm a child frightened of the monster under their bed. As if my fear of authority is completely ridiculous. I have absolutely nothing to defend myself with besides the words of this nerdy Alicorn.
The four grey guards come to a stop in front of us, three of them keeping a close eye on me as the fourth, probably the leader, looks to Twilight. His voice is surprisingly gruff for a pony.
"Princess Sparkle, has this creature been trouble for you? We received a report of a tall monster from the Everfree by Mr. Sleetstone and this thing fits the description" Mr. Sleetstone, that little grey unicorn bastard, that has to be him. The guard glares at me, studying me up and down as if looking for my weak points.
Twilight huffs and sounds more than a little pissed off. "This is not a monster from the Everfree, his name is Robert Oppenheimer and he is an undocumented intelligent species. I'm going to be having a diplomatic meeting with him and I'd prefer if you didn't possibly cause the first war in a millennia by detaining him!" My eyebrows are about as high up as they can go, same can be said for the guards as well. Didn't think Twilight could stand up for herself so well, what a relief.
The guards shuffle back and forth on their hooves, seemingly unsure of how to proceed after the scolding they received from a princess. The leader looks me over one last time, blinks, then bids his farewell. As they trudge past they give me the stink eye, which I reply to with a toothy smile, shutting them down immediately upon seeing my comparatively sharp teeth. Works every time.
Catching back up to Twilight, she looks at me a little nervously.
"You came from the Everfree forest? What were you doing in there?" I spare a glance down at her, consider my reply then wave her off.
"Let's wait until we're somewhere private, the information is a little sensitive" She seems to wilt a little at being forced to wait, but goes right back to scribbling on the floating notepad in front of her never the less.
That's a good question though. What am I gonna tell her and how long am I going to speak to her overall? I'm definitely not being held down for hours as she fills out a novel worth of text. Should I get the stuff I need and just book it to the train station? Maybe I shouldn't even take a train, if Celestia's guards are on the hunt for me they're going to be watching the train stations.
Maybe I'll have to get my hostage sooner than I thought. Will that allow me to just waltz into the castle though? What if they don't even understand my threat in the first place? Maybe I'm better off without a hostage. Hell, maybe I should just hand myself over and hope they show some forgiveness...
A girls voice inside my right ear pierces the clouds of my thoughts.
"Hello? We're here" I flinch back and put my right arm protectively out in front of me, only to find Twilight standing inside the doorway to the library with an expectant look.
"Oh" She laughs at my antics and walks off around a corner. Swallowing the adrenaline dying down after that surprise, I duck through the doorway and go to where I suppose Twilight must be. Moving through the main library I don't see any sign of the neon colored dragon. I wonder how many of those books make complete sense? Sure you can get an AI to generate literature pretty accurately, but it's not exactly perfect all the time.
Pushing open a slightly ajar door I see stone stairs plunging down into a basement, inside I can hear the echoes of murmuring, clinking and shuffling. As soon as I begin descending into the depths the air drops in temperature, not enough to make me shiver but enough to be uncomfortable. See this is why you always bring winter clothes into sims with you. Thanks for nothing but a brightly colored t-shirt Celestia, you bitch.
After travelling down a few dozen steps I emerge into a square room with no decorations and a surprisingly high roof. Against the walls lie wooden workbenches with all manner of gizmos and contraptions whirring, beeping and doing generally ridiculous things. In the furthest most corner Twilight is bent over a metal chest floating bits and pieces around her head, still muttering to herself.
"Flammable liquid, It should be easy to enchant water in a vial to combust when flame is applied to-" I tune her out, instead trying my best to sneak up on her on the hard ground. I can hear my footfalls clear as day but apparently the mare is too preoccupied to notice.
Standing behind Twilight I take a moment to lean over her mane, trying to decipher what she's doing exactly. My left eyebrow rises as I watch Twilight pick up ingots of metal in her magic before heating them up and molding them into hollow cylinders. It's a little terrifying that she can do that with nothing but her magic.
It's mesmerizing to watch her work though, the grooves of the threading simply appear out of nowhere as if an invisible lathe is working around the red hot steel. I look over to her right to see most of what I need is sitting on an empty bench. Is Twilight taking lessons on being a blacksmith or something, if she can do this without education I don't see how you could make a profession out of armor making. Maybe blacksmiths focus on enchantments in this world?
A steel ingot is brought in line with her eyes in a purple haze, heating up it splits into four pieces that begin to be molded like clay. They're pushed in and flattened out a little, slowly taking the form of what I assume are some end caps. If she can do all of this with steel, she could totally make me some basic firearm like a STEN gun.
Is that really a good idea though? I feel like I'm already pushing my luck big time with asking her for this. You know seeing as she's the science girl I thought I might have to bullshit my way out of her suspicions that I am in fact making a bomb.
Of course I have absolutely no idea what the word bomb means, my only knowledge of 'explosives' are from fireworks which have only ever been used for happy, peaceful purposes. I am simply making a benign, special firework from my culture. No, I cannot demonstrate it to you because it's strictly for private affairs only.
Doesn't Pinkie have a cannon though? You'd think they'd know what black powder can do. Maybe it's not powered by black powder and instead uses her cocaine magic, that's a fitting explanation. Something pushes into my legs, I look down to see a purple furry butt attached to a heavily blushing Alicorn. Upon making eye contact with me she makes a loud sound of distress and stumbles back into a table.
I step back as my face scrunches up in disgust. Is she seriously blushing? Why would she be thinking of sexual connotations to an accident with a species she only just met!? Oh. I forgot I'm in an isekai sim intended for lonely bronies.
I hear a Fluttershy level of quiet, "S-sorry, I uh, I didn't know y-you were be-behind me" She winces and crouches down a little before me. I roll my eyes as this supposedly incredibly powerful entity shakes at the thought of offending me with a little bump.
"It's fine Twilight, don't worry about it. I see you've got most of what I need ready anyway" Without waiting for her to recover I walk over to the bench in question. It has the saddlebag, a coil of string behind it. A glass jar of what I can only assume is the flammable water I heard her muttering about sits to the right of the bag. A small, pointed, red ruby lies in front of it, I have no clue what that is.
The pipes look fine, maybe a little big but that's fine, the end caps all have holes in them though, I only want six of the twelve caps to have holes. I turn back to the Alicorn who's face is still red.
"This is really cool, but I only want half of the caps to have holes and uh, where's the lighter?" Twilight stands back up to her full height as her eyes look up into the corner of her vision.
"I can fix the caps for you, but there's already a lighter there" I open my mouth to sarcastically ask if the lighter is invisible when I remember the ruby.
"How is the ruby lighter activated? The ones I'm used to aren't like um... they aren't like that" My eyes travel back to the ruby, does Twilight think I can use magic to activate it? Do I want her to think I have magic?
"Oh, it can be used without magic so all you need to do is squeeze it" Cool. Twilight walks back up to the metal chest, looking behind herself to make sure she's not going to bump into me again. All she has to do is levitate the caps, meld the hole back together and wallah. Man, it sucks I don't have magic, that'd make life so much easier.
Once she's done she levitates everything into the two pouches on the brown cloth saddlebag. It's a bit of a squeeze for the pipes but they fit. I pick up the bag and strap it over my left shoulder and under my right armpit, it works surprisingly well for something designed for a pony.
Checkpoint two down. I smile at Twilight, instead of returning it she continues to stare at where the bag used to be. I tilt my head in confusion, then my stomach drops. Is she finally questioning what the fuck she just gave me? I silently turn around to creep up the stairs, fireworks in the crook of my left arm and everything else I need on my back.
"I don't wish to intrude, but how could you be going to a party in Canterlot when no one's ever heard of your species before?" I want to teleport out of here with magic, but all I can do is freeze on the first step and slowly turn my head back to Twilight, who looks more introspective then worried.
My eyes bounce around the room, looking anywhere but into her eyes.
"Well I, you know there's more than just me. I'm a rare species in these parts of Equus but I'm meeting up with family who are, uh, on vacation in Canterlot" I'm not sure if she entirely buys it, but she looks a little less worried after my hasty bullshit.
"And what are you going to do at the party with everything I just gave you? Are you making your own fireworks?" I nod my head vigorously to answer her question. I go to talk but find my throat blocked, I cough a few times and the bullshit meter goes to maximum.
"Well yes it's a special kind of private firework from my culture. I couldn't tell you how it works because each clan has its own unique spin on it so it's secretive, sorry" I put the cherry on top in the form of an apologetic smile and a shrug.
Twilight stares into my eyes, unblinking and unmoving. She is going over each chapter of my very soul, a mind reading spell working it's magic as my sins are laid bare. She turns darker and she grows to take up more of both my mind and the basement. Her horn glows as she prepares a stunning spell that will make sure I never wake up again.
Then she laughs, covering her mouth with a wing.
"Of course, I'm sorry. I forgot you're from a completely different culture then me, naturally some of your practices will confuse me a little. But that's why you're here, so we can talk to each other and mutually learn more!" With the horror averted she happily trots past me and up the stairs into the library.
I swallow back the vomit rising in my throat, but the vibrating hands and pumping adrenaline remain. Letting out a shaky breath, I trudge up the stairs in her wake. Was that all in my head or does she know? She could have already written a warning to Celestia and used Spike to have it instantly appear before her. She might know I'm up to something, I did a terrible job at lying before.
As if confirming my paranoid musing, I emerge from the cold staircase to see Spike lying back on a beanbag in the library. He sees me and jumps up far too energetically, walking toward me with his clawed feet. I back away, head jerking around trying to see which exit I can reach first.
"Hi Robert, my name's Spike! You're super tall!" I look down at the pink and green dragon, his face a picture of awe. Has Twilight told him yet? Is he going to breath green fire on me and send me to Celestia? A gunshot comes from my right, I move to pull the M9A3 out of its holster but I find it's not there.
"Alright, Robert! A-Oh are you okay?" I'm on something lumpy and soft, I push myself off my right side and onto my back. This is a good position from where I can see almost every entrance. Where the hell is the gunman? I didn't know Equestria had guns! Spike's voice is exacerbated as he looks up to Twilight.
"What did you do to him, Twilight? He's all jumpy! I told you, you can't just cast spells on anypony to see how they react!" Twilight blushes and scoffs, her voice wavering and stuttering.
"I-I didn't cast any spells on him! I haven't done that to s-somepony in uh, a few days! I've been good, okay!?" How the fuck did these two not hear the literal gunshot that just went off! I sink down further into what I now recognize is a beanbag, waving my arms at the two to get their attention.
"Did you not just hear that loud fucking crack! Why do you not care about that!?" I look between the two with jazz hands on maximum overdrive. I'm trying and failing to find an explanation in their eyes.
"I teleported?..." Twilight's looking at me as if I'm an alien. As if teleporting is just this common knowledge thing that results in gunshot sounds wherever you end up and everyone is fine with it! My heart that was trying to beat out of my chest just a second ago skips a beat in sheer confusion at what it's meant to be doing.
My confusion must have been present on my face as Twilight stops scribbling into her notes and hastily apologizes.
"I'm so sorry! I didn't know you've never experienced somepony teleporting before! It scares young foals too, I-I should have known..." Somehow she manages to look even more defeated then she did when I initially rejected her request at the party. Spike waddles over and begins hugging Twilight's leg and mumbling reassurances to her.
But why did she teleport here if she never even had time to leave the building? Where the fuck did she go? My eyes narrow and I study her face, tears now staining her muzzle and slowly dripping onto the wooden floor. She sobs to Spike about how she screwed up the first ever meeting with a new species in hundreds of years, at least that's the jist of the mumbling I'm over hearing.
This girl is incredibly invested in this meeting going perfectly isn't she? Is that just an act intended to stall me with guilt though? She teleported somewhere, she could have talked to absolutely anyone in that time. Even if she didn't act against me I don't see how she wouldn't realize I'd feel uncomfortable with her just teleporting off somewhere. I guess ponies are pretty laid back compared to you know, real living things.
I can't really get up and run away because she could just stun me using some spell. But I could totally use her despair to my advantage, she's emotionally vulnerable and completely distracted. I can feign her mistake being a much bigger issue then it actually is and get the fuck out of here.
I slowly stand up and creep closer to the colorful duo. I take a deep breath and put on what I hope comes across as an angry face.
"I didn't expect this from a so called princess of Equestria, all I wished to do was move through this humble town and I'm pulled into a party against my will, harassed by guards who called me a creature, questioned if I have criminal intentions for requesting a customary gift and then to top it all off my ears are almost blown out by the apparent resident scientist of the kingdom without warning!"
As the words leave my mouth my fake angry expression morphs into a real face of frustration. Everything I just said was true, I've only been here for a few dozen minutes at most and I've been treated like some strange, criminal animal who doesn't have free will. I realize I didn't breathe back in and take a few gaping breaths as I look over to the princess to see her reaction.
She's slowly nodding, Spike doesn't exactly look angry but he's looking at me with an expression I'm sure I'd run away from if only he wasn't so tiny. I'm impressed at my ability to be an asshole to fictional beings, maybe it's my special talent and I'll get an ass tattoo for it.
The silence drags on as the tension in the room grows, the only sounds are the occasional hitches or sobs from Twilight. Time to leave. I clear my throat to gain their attention.
"I need some bits and directions for a ticket to Canterlot, I'd consider it a good enough apology for what I've been put through" I feel slimy just saying that stuff, but I'm the only one here with my life on the line! Spike opens his mouth to presumably chew me out for being a cunt to his surrogate mother but she beats him to the punch.
"Right... of course. When you leave the library take the first right and follow the road" She reaches into the right side of her saddlebag with a purple aura and pulls out a small bag bound with knotted thread and places it into my own saddlebag. My eyes flick from left to right as my body tries to unfreeze itself.
Second checkpoint complete...? I shuffle a little toward the door, make eye contact with Spike who now looks genuinely pissed off before spinning and marching out of the building.
The fresh air hitting my face is one of the most relieving things I think I've ever felt, I feel like I've just finished defusing a bomb. I begin hiking down the cobblestone road, paying no attention to the curious looks I'm receiving in doing so.
I totally understand those guys competing in the questionably legal sim tournaments now. Those dudes were competing to not be sent to a psychopaths vision of hell and I'm competing to get back to the real world, failure resulting in death.
These feelings are a hundred times stronger than anything I've felt when getting shot at, hunted by a monster or engaging in a sword fight. With something genuinely horrible threatening me against failure, everything I do feels incredibly important. Every waking second I feel like I'm truly in control of my own destiny. Everything before this was just play acting with no real stakes besides pain and the at first horrifying feeling of dying. Took a while to get used to that, but I got there and then it was meaningless.
Maybe I was on the same track as everyone else all along, chasing those ever increasing highs forever. No, none of that matters anymore. I promised myself I would never use a sim ever again. Fuck it, I'll straight up destroy my PC when I get back. I can't let myself go further down the rabbit hole then I already have. I'm going to escape and I'm going to rip the rest of my family out of their sims too. I'm not losing myself.
But you already did. I let out a sharp snarl and scrunch up my face at the intrusive thought. But I can't deny it, I literally committed suicide to escape my responsibilities and here I am trying to take it back. God I'm so fucking useless, I can't save the world if I can't even bother living.
My eyes refocus on the world around me. I've gotten out of the populated center of the town and I'm now only seeing a home here or there with more trees and bushes popping up along the dirt path. I kick a rock into a tree with a satisfying, hollow THUNK. I keep walking, but something hard impacts the back of my head. I whip around with my free hand up to punch someone in the face. No one's there.
I look down to see what hit me. Is that a fucking acorn? With my guard down another acorn strikes me on the top of the head. I let out a hiss of pain and look toward the tree I kicked the rock into originally. There's a little brown squirrel chattering away rather angrily with yet another acorn in their tiny hands. I see it coming and bat it aside, my knuckles complaining about the blow.
I don't care how impossibly strong this squirrel is, it's time on Equus is over. I lay the fireworks down, catch an incoming acorn and proceed to overhand throw it as hard as I possibly can at the fluffy menace. It looks like it's going to hit, but it ducks down and swings below the branch it was sitting on, dodging the possibly fatal blow in time.
"What's your problem you little shit! You trying to give me a concussion!?" I roar and beeline at it but of course it just scrambles at the speed of light all the way up into the canopy. I come to a stop, kicking up dirt and panting heavily.
"I'm chasing a goddamn squirrel around" My shoulders slump and I run a hand down my face. I'm so skilled at assholery even the animals hate me. Further grumbling to myself I turn back down the path to see several squirrels dragging my fireworks into a bush. That's it.
I take a few steps and leap. As I soar down toward them all they all scatter off except one. As I land on top of it I hear a high pitched squeal, followed by a crunch. The scattered bird songs go quiet, the squirrels cease squeaking and even the wind seems to stop. The hairs on the back of my neck stand up, I feel like I'm being watched. Nope.
I scoop up the fireworks and sprint down the path, each thud of my shoes sound like thunderous booms in the deafening silence I had just created. I forgot this place is fucking magical, of course the spirit of harmonious, homosexual animal harmony is going to hunt me down and spew molten rainbows into my soul.
My eyes dart back and forth between every bush, tree and boulder. I zip past a very confused pony and continued on until I saw a little shack in the distance with a unprotected train track in front of it. If the train doesn't get here soon I'm going to hear tip toe through the tulips slowly growing louder as the forest spirit comes to molest me.
Just as I reach the platform I remember the dead squirrel guts stuck to the bottom of my right shoe. I turn my foot up to see that the blood acted like glue and collected dirt from the trail. I wipe it off on the grass and look back the way I came. Hopefully no one finds the squirrel and freaks out like it's a murder case, surely only the thing that caused the creepy silence would care right? With a shrug, I pull myself up onto the train platform.
There's about a dozen ponies and they all look very surprised at me opting to skip the stairs. Still sucking in a few lungfuls of precious air, I hobble over to a desk manned by a green pony who manages to look entirely disinterested in me.
I put a finger up as a signal to wait and take a moment to collect myself. When my throats stops burning so much I reach into the bottom pocket of the saddlebag and fish out the little bag. I look up to try and see a board showing arrival and departure times but such a thing isn't present.
I look over the green pony who's busy staring off into space.
"When's the next train to Canterlot?" Following my question the ponies behind me start conversing once again in hushed whispers. The green pony slowly moves her head so that her eyes never actually stop looking in the same location, but none the less she manages to look at me.
I raise both my eyebrows and put my hands up to reiterate what I asked. She responds in monotone.
"Soon" Holy shit give me a break. I sigh and open up the bag.
"How much does a single ticket cost?" She blinks.
"Five bits" I scoop a handful of bits out of the bag and count out five into my hand. I hold my hand out in front of her to take them off me. She looks down at my hand then back up to me. Oh right she doesn't have hands. I opt to just put them on the table, which is apparently what I was meant to do as she reaches under the desk and pulls out a piece of paper.
I take it from in between her hoof and her... ankle? Curtly nodding I turn around and make my way over to a wooden bench. There's a space on the edge I can fit on, but apparently my entrance was so frightening the other two ponies on the bench decided it'd be better to let me have it all to myself.
With a shrug I decide I don't give a shit and plop down. It's definitely not tall enough as my knees are forced up too high to be comfortable, but the green bitch said the train would be soon so this'll have to do. Pulling the paper up to my face, it just says 'Ponyville to Canterlot 12:44pm' Did a printing machine make this? It doesn't look written.
I'm happy to know the time, sucks I wasn't given a watch.
Twilight's sitting in her basement, staring at the blank concrete wall. She mumbles to herself. "But why would he do that?" Her face scrunches up and her right foreleg taps her chin.
Still wearing the same focused face she moves over to the components chest and peers in. Her head moves around the contents, eyes scanning over the different materials she has available. Twilight exhales slowly and picks up a steel ingot in her magic before making a few pipes and end caps.
As she cools them off and places them onto a table a loud noise causes her to jump and spin to face the intruder. Pinkie pie hops like a rabbit toward Twilight and spins around with a wide grin, a box in her fore hooves.
Twilight lets out a sigh of relief and smiles seeing her friend Pinkie. "Oh, Pinkie you scared me!" Pinkie laughs and pushes the box into Twilight's chest.
"I got you the rainbow crackle boom, booms!" Twilight's smile immediately leaves her face as she picks up the box and begins pulling out rockets. Pinkie tilts her head to the side, her continuous bobbing and spinning ceasing. She opens her mouth a few times to try and ask what's wrong, but Twilight is busy doing science stuff.
Twilight finishes her work in little time and inspects the three full metal pipes, caps screwed on and string coming out of the top. Every moment looking at the pipes makes her face darken and her eyes widen.
"What's wrong twi? I'm sure your fireworks are gonna be awesome!" Pinkie's reinvigorated energy dies once again as Twilight picks up the three pipes along with a ruby and a jar of water, not taking the time to respond to Pinkie's statement. Twilight puts the components in a saddlebag and walks straight past Pinkie toward the exit.
Pinkie looks between Twilight and the three empty pipes with a slowly straightening mane as they climb the stairs and enter the Library. Upon seeing Twilight, Spike frowns and speaks in a soft tone.
"Ah, I'm sorry Twi-" Twilight interrupts Spike's apology with a firm, "No. I'm sorry for refusing to listen to you. I didn't want to believe Robert would do something like that, but..." Twilight studies the floor and moves toward the door.
She gives a sad smile to Pinkie and Spike in turn. "We'll find out, won't we?" Pinkie looks confused.
"We'll find out what Twilight? What's going on? Why did Spike try to apologize and why are you sad? Did Robert do something naughty?" Twilight pauses at the door and looks back at Pinkie.
"I don't know right now, Pinkie. I just don't know."
I wonder if I'd actually need to run off into the forest to avoid people seeing me make black powder pipe bombs? I mean if one of the most educated ponies didn't immediately recognize what I was doing then evidently these rural farmers wouldn't. No one at the party including Twilight thought it was weird to give a stranger explosives too.
Most of those around me are earth ponies and there are no unicorns, thank god for that. Unicorns just make me uncomfortable. No one likes having a loaded gun pointed at them, the thing is whenever a unicorn is even near me it's like the exact same thing. If they feel like popping my head under the pressure of a million atmospheres, they could just do it. I have no clue what they can actually do, that's the scary part.
With a shrug I get out the apparently flammable jar of water. After opening it up I sniff it, expecting it to smell like kerosene, but it's just water. Holy shit it must be so easy to poison people in this world, if everything wasn't written to be as innocent and friendly as possible this reality would be hell.
I bite off a length of string twice the length of the pipe and dip it into the water before laying half of it into the pipe. I look up to see if I'm attracting a crowd, three ponies in a circle to my right are sneaking glances my way but by all means they just look curious. The ridiculousness of making explosives in public view makes me giggle like an idiot.
Emboldened by the lack of alarm I pull a rocket out of the bundle on the seat to my left and look it over for a way to open it. I wish I had a knife but in the end I managed to pick away at the bottom until I tore it out and poured the powder down the pipe. It only filled it halfway up, six divided by two is three, therefore three pipes and six end caps are going to be temporarily useless. I guess an empty pipe could be used as a club, which gives me an option for non-explosive defense.
Once the pipe was full I threaded the string through the hole in the end cap and screwed it on. Wallah, a single black powder pipe bomb. I smiled at my newfound ability to actually defend myself, although there won't be all that much shrapnel thrown out. I need to find a way to surround it in nails, pebbles or some other loose material to make more projectiles.
Just as I dip the second string into the water I hear a dull rumble in my body. I strain my ears and hear what must be the train approaching from my left. Quickly packing up I drop the string in the pipe and close it up before dumping everything into the saddlebag and standing up.
My knees creak a little as I stretch and limber my legs before I'm stuck sitting down for a while. As I look around the number of ponies has only grown a little, I count fifteen in total. Unless this train is tiny or there's a lot of people coming from more southern towns this should be a pretty roomy ride.
I wish I had that map from this sims page, but from memory the distance from Ponyville to Canterlot is around twenty kilometers, if I'm moving via steam train that should be a pretty short ride. Maybe twenty minutes minimum? Let's say Twilight sent a message to the guard in Canterlot as soon as I left her home which was maybe twenty minutes ago.
That's fourty minutes total for the guard to collect themselves and set up a perimeter around the train station in Canterlot. Is that enough? Sure if they had radios and vehicles it'd be plenty of time, but they have neither. If they wanted a dozen guards they'd need to first find them, then they'd need to convey the message to them of what's happening and where they need to go, then they'd to move to the station.
Does that leave me with time to slip by? Wait no, if the guards already know I'm hostile I'm not going to be able to speak to Celestia until I'm stripped and thrown into a cell. How do I talk to her without having that happen?
A loud whistle hurts my ears a little as the train pulls up to the platform, the brakes slowing it down with a droning hiss. Holy shit, this is the most disgusting vehicle I have ever seen in my entire life, not to mention it looks too small in every way. There's a weird array of colors, a sort of theme for the carriages. The only colors are brown, a puke colored yellow, a light blue and a eye watering hot pink.
There's no real rhyme or reason to the colors, why they were chosen or why each part of the train was said color. Was it intended to look like a cake or something? Why? Hanging out of the front window is what I assume is the driver, a dull yellow stallion with a white and blue hat, a red bandanna around his neck. The room is so tiny he must have to sit on his haunches during the entire ride, do ponies find that comfortable?
I shake my head to stop picking apart this blatantly fictional cartoon world and show my ticket to the driver. He gives me a weird look but motions for me to get aboard. I hope there won't be random ticket checks like on real trains, I'm not sure how they'd handle me.
As I step inside I try to extend my legs but find out with a hollow thud that I'm forced to bend over a little as the roof is too low. Grumbling obscenities I rub my head and look over the absolutely tiny carriage. There's no seats, it's just red carpet and four blue tinted windows with frilly curtains around them. What the hell am I meant to sit on?
The four ponies that are in the carriage with me scoot to the opposite side and practically huddle each other for comfort. They're sitting on their butts with their hind legs splayed across the floor and their front legs keeping their torso up right. It's kind of weird to look at since their legs are shorter and stockier then real ponies.
In this moment I am eternally thankful that they have the courtesy to use their tails as a cover and block the sight of their privates. That's not a topic I should've let into my mind, oh now I can't stop thinking of magical pony vaginas god damn it. I rub my eyes and take the single stride required to make my way into the corner of the carriage. I turn around and plop my ass down on the ground with my legs crossed.
Twenty minutes. Twenty minutes for me to consider my next gravely important steps. What I come up with in these minutes is the literal difference between life and death, my family's life and death. I close my eyes and control my breathing.
First things first, I need to finish these two pipe bombs, should also keep the ruby in a pocket for quicker access. As I pull open a rocket and follow the procedure I went through last time I consider what the fuck is going to happen.
Even if there's no guards at the station, It'll take a few dozen minutes for me to walk to the castle, Canterlot is meant to be the biggest city in Equus. In that time, what do I do if guards attempt to take my saddlebag? Sure I can light up a pipe and throw it in their face before diving behind some solid cover, but that's a one way trip into the dungeons. I don't think I could escape the city, even if I could I still wouldn't be able to leave this damn sim.
Considering it's possible Celestia has no memory of the massacre I carried out previously, maybe it's best if I try explaining my situation to her and seeing if she can allow me to exit the sim without using threats. If she claims she doesn't know what I'm talking about or denies my request I could threaten to light off the bombs, potentially killing the guards who will surely be close by. She could call it a bluff, but I'm dead either way.
Could she stop the fuse or just make the bombs disappear? I grimace at the thought of all this work going down the drain. I just don't know what she'll fucking do.
Maybe I should just try and assassinate both Luna and Celestia at once? If they both die would their potential hold over me be lifted and my exit permitted? My nails cut my face as I clench up in stress.
How do I escape a sim I made inescapable? The only few times I've heard of people escaping this scenario involved a real person pulling them out and every time they just try and kill themselves again. This is a suicide method after all. No one's going to pull me out anyway, that's for sure.
But there has to be more going on here. I was given clothing I never set as default and was interrupted by Celestia after two resets. Not to fucking mention being turned into a foal I killed in a completely different reset. How is that even possible? Can developers even do that? I've never heard of anything like it. There must be something with Celestia, she has to have the solution, she has to be able to get me out.
But if she knows I killed her little ponies in a different reality, surely she knows this is a sim? Then she'd also know my death would result in her death. So she'd have no choice but to imprison me and keep me alive in the sim for as long as possible. I don't want to spend my last months of life in a damp, dark cell for the benefit of a computer. I'd rather blow myself up.
I pull the ruby out of my pocket and turn it over in my hands. I put it between my pointer and thumb and slowly squeeze it. Silently a small jet of flame comes to life on the pointed tip of the gem. I furrow my brows, considering how much life it has in it. One thing's for sure, I can't have Celestia take the ruby out of my hands, I'd be fucked.
I take three segments of string and try my best to tie the gem to the end of my left pointer finger. It's a bit of a pain since making it too tight just sets it off. After some finagling I manage to get it secure. One less possible weak point resolved. I tilt my head. If magic is my only concern, could I buy some kind of anti magic ward with the bits I have?
I reach into my saddlebag and pull out the bag from Twilight. I open it up and pour it out onto the soft floor. Counting them out, they come to a total of thirty seven. That doesn't sound like a lot, not considering a short train ride is five bits. Why do they have to be so big if they are worth so little? Just switch to paper currency like a modern civilization already.
I gather them back up into the bag, putting it into a zipper pocket on my thigh. I look up at the window across from me, the tops of trees are whizzing past at a decently fast pace, although a car on a highway would be quicker.
Being careful not to bump my head again I stand up and shuffle over to said window, the four ponies to my right ceasing their conversation before turning to spectate me. Outside the window a wide, grassy field extends on for a good while before being interrupted by a forest. I push my face up against the glass and try to peer as far ahead as I can. In the distance the form of mountains can be seen, which one Canterlot resides on I'm not sure.
"Uh..." A shy mare's voice can barely be heard over the rhythmic clinking of the train tracks below. I peel my face off the glass and spin around to see a pink furred, blue maned mare standing before me. I look over to the other three ponies, one of them pushes the shy girl closer to me with an amused expression.
After the push the mare finds confidence to speak again. "Wh-what are you?" What am I?
"I'm a chaos god here to destroy all of reality with nuclear destruction, my name is Robert Oppenheimer by the way, what's yours?" I stick out a hand in greeting, stifling a chuckle with a few coughs as the mare's pink eyes go wide at my apparent chaotic affairs. She begins to vibrate a little, the adrenaline in her body clearly yelling at her to flee, yet she's on a train and that isn't exactly possible.
I roll my eyes at yet another display of pony autism. "Jesus I was just joking. You really think a 'chaotic god' would just casually say something like that? Well actually no Discord might, I'm not dis..." My words trail off as I consider what I just said.
Discord. How did I not consider Discord in all of this? What if that guy can get me out of here? My eyes grow wider still as my arm remains extended, the request for a handshake never being recuperated. All the AI's powers are obviously only real in this world, if a unicorn read my mind they'd only be able to see what I've experienced during my time in their world. Easy way to prove this is a sim, mind you.
Discord is powerful, but would his power be able to boot me back into the real world? Even if he could, would he want to? Letting me out would allow me to wipe the sim and kill everything. I blink, my eyes berating me for the second time to stop forgetting about them while in deep thought.
The pink mare had since been joined by her three friends in front of me, all of them equally ridiculous colors. You know their colors are a good argument they never existed before their technology, why would anything non-poisonous evolve to be so easily seen? Maybe like colorful birds picking out the prettiest to mate with? That would only work for Pegasi.
"If you're not a chaotic god, what are you exactly? You kinda look like a minotaur but you're not so angry or hairy" The yellow pony takes a moment to look over my body. "Your clothes mean you're probably some rich pony living in Canterlot though" Two of her friends nod their head in agreement with that statement. "Say, why do you have a ruby lighter tied to a finger?"
My back begins to ache a little at my awkward bent position. Rubbing at it with my left hand I move back to the corner I was in without replying. Sitting back down I close my eyes and lean my head against the slightly vibrating carriage wall. The sound of the clinking tracks and chugging engine reverberates through my skull as if it were underwater.
"Hey, I asked you a question. Are you really gonna ignore some friendly pony?" I breathe in and out. These guys went from nervous to assertive quickly. This is a waste of important time.
"Yes I am going to ignore you, I have some very important matters to attend to on my own. I would prefer if you'd leave me alone like before" I hear a huff of annoyance but my eyes remain closed.
I don't know where Canterlot station is in comparison to Canterlot itself. Is it in the center or on the edge? If I arrive to see guards waiting for me, do I surrender? If they don't take me to Celestia I'll probably never get to see her, why would she bother to visit a weird species of criminal. Well no, I'm not a criminal yet. I've broken no laws so far.
Do I just ask them to take me to Celestia as soon as possible? Discord's statue is there too right? Or was he unfrozen by the time MLP ended? This is why you don't trap yourself in a fictional world you don't even know much about ladies and gentleman. What the fuck am I going to do? My face scrunches up and I feel the tightness in my chest intensify as I feel ready to cry.
I bring my legs up against the saddlebag covering my torso and bury my face in my pants, doing my best to hug myself and not cry like a baby. I've been riding a rollercoaster of emotions not just during my time trapped here, but for the past few years of my life. Ever since escaping reality was commercially available everything's been turned upside down and lit on fire.
Why did I think my family would want to be saved from their crippling addictions? No one wants that, I'd be seen as a threat to their new way of life. I take a sharp breath and let the emotions come out through my tears. No point pretending to be strong when I've already proven to everyone that I'm not. Why am I even bothering to try and return, there's nothing there for me. No one who cares anymore.
I press myself into the corner of the carriage further, I wish I could just phase into the wall and never come out. I wouldn't even be returning to my home, the place I live doesn't feel like home anymore. It's a silent reminder of how good my life used to be. Everything has memories attached of the good times I had, good times that will never return.
Something furry wraps itself around me, warm breath cascades down the back of my neck as someone's head brushes my hair around. I stop crying and freeze up, memories of my original meeting with Fluttershy months ago plays through my mind. This happened exactly the same way as before and it feels just as amazing. I know it's not real, but just the feeling of a hug is so powerful after I hadn't gotten any support from the real world in so, so long.
I open my eyes to look between the gap in my now tear stained pants, the ponie's legs are pink so it must be the first of the four I encountered in this carriage. The sound of her breathing above me mixes with the chugging of the train to slowly calm my thoughts and warm my heart. My eyes are still forcing out a few sporadic tears but my stress is mostly under control for now.
"Thanks" My voice comes out more monotone then I intended, but crying out your emotions takes a lot of energy. The mare slowly inhales, apparently readying for a grand speech.
She pulls her head off mine to speak. "Why were you crying?" Her soft voice has a lot more volume when it's coming from right next to my left ear. That's a good question, but how would it work to answer it truthfully? I kind of danced around the truth when I explained my troubles to Fluttershy and that worked out.
"I just um, I have a lot on my mind. A lot's going to happen when I arrive at Canterlot and I don't know..." I let out a sigh. "I don't know if I'll be able to handle what I hear" The mare slowly steps away from me, much to my disappointment. I uncurl my stiff body and look up to see her friends sitting around me with varying expressions.
The red one breaks the silent staring contest with a mournful look. "I know what you mean Rob, I wanted to play the cello for the Galloping Gala last year but they said I w-wasn't good enough" She rubs her front hooves together and looks over her friends.
"I didn't think I'd ever be a good musician but I... I had my friends and my family. Ponies to remind me I'm not just important for work with my cutie mark, but for who I am as a pony" She lets out a hopeful smile. I appreciate the intimate life experience she just shared with a complete stranger, but it doesn't apply to me. No one cares, no one knows.
"I don't have any family or friends" A few gasps, they're all shocked to a comical degree. God this really is a cartoon world where hardly anything tragic ever happens. The pink one pity hugs me and the orange one waves her front hooves in the air trying to form her thoughts into words.
"We'll be your friends! Right ponies?" She looks between her friends, all of which reply with yeah or sure besides the yellow one who I blew off before. She just nods slowly with a stiff body.
I shake my head and regrettably push the pink mare off of me.
"Look I'm sorry but with what's going to happen I'm not going to be able to be your friend. I appreciate the gesture but... sorry" I stand up and turn around to look out the window behind me. The trees and fields have since turned into rocky cliffs and mountains. Looks like we're almost there, seems I wasted most of the time given to me by letting my emotions get the better of me. I hear an expression of awe behind me.
The mares are probably looking down off the mountain we're on through the windows behind me, but I don't want to look at them again. Just avoid what causes you pain and you'll slowly drown in your filth... We pass by a waterfall and the first buildings come into view. The main colors of everything are white, gold and purple. Some of the ponies are wearing odd clothing, I mean it's odd enough for a pony to wear clothes in the first place really.
I'm not sure if we're going right through the city or if we're going around it, maybe we're skirting the outside on the edge of the mountain? Not the most comforting thought but hey magic am I right? The train lets out a few blasts of its horn and many ponies stop to either wave or just watch the train.
I'm not sure how visible I am, but I only see a few ponies who seemingly notice the weird alien face peeking out at them. Just like Ponyville the stores are built next to homes, except now everything is at least two stories tall. Not all that impressive compared to a real city, but real cities are a grey, dirty mess of homeless people and jay walking. This is much better.
I was hoping the station would be a decent distance from the thick of it for an easy option of escape, but now it looks like I'm going to be right next to the goddamn castle. I sigh, now resigned to my fate. Three pipe bombs won't save me from Celestia, let alone Discord. I'm still not sure what I'm going to do if I can't get out though, I don't want to think about it.
In the corner of my eyes I see the pink mare sitting down next to me, apparently not looking out of the other window on this side of the carriage. I opt to ignore her, why bother getting emotionally attached to something that won't exist within the next half an hour?
"Do you think I could join you in um, whatever it is your going to do?" I turn my head to the mare who I still don't know the name of, probably something like racing heart or some shit since her cutie mark is in fact a bunch of red hearts. What is she even good at then? Oh I need to answer a question.
I speak in a deadpan tone. "Well you feel like being arrested and escorted to Celestia? Cause I'm thinking that's what's gonna happen" I watch as her face goes from steadfast to unsure. She looks to the floor with a look of concentration. Is she actually considering this? The train shudders and the hissing of the brakes stabs my heart with dread.
I look back up to the window but I don't see the station, must be to our left. I quickly turn around and trudge up behind the orange mare who was partially blocking the window she was looking through. Moving my head around hers I get a good view of the station and my heart rate doubles instantly.
Fuck loads of guards, I mean like three dozen out of the shitty line of sight I have around this giant orange mass of fur in my way. The mares in my carriage gasp at the sight and begin nervously talking amongst themselves, wondering what's caused so many identical spear wielding horses to watch the train arrive.
I feel someone tap my back a few times and I wheel around with my hands at the zippers of my saddlebag. The pink mare looks just as stressed out as I probably do, her eyes darting between her friends, the guards and me.
"Why are you being arrested?" I shake my head a little too hard and give myself a headache.
"Shut the fuck up!" She shrinks back and tears well up in her eyes. I turn back to the window that's now free seeing as the orange mare is now comforting her friend. I crouch down trying to only expose my eyes and creep forward for a better view.
Did they bring the entire royal guard or something? They're morons! They know I have explosives on me yet they bring as many ponies as possible and put them all together as tightly as they can! I shake my head and draw a gasping breath, I'm breathing as fast as I can but I constantly feel like I'm running out of oxygen.
A guard yells and points at the window I'm looking through with a spear, the rest of them immediately lock eyes with me. I wheel around and grab the first pony I see, the pink one. She screams loud enough to make my ears ring. I move her around so her legs are facing outward as I lift her up with my left arm underneath her front legs.
"Let me go! Please I don't want to do this please!" She's kicking at everything she can as she squirms in my arm, but she's not as strong or as scared as I am. I pull out a pipe from the saddlebag with my right hand and hold the fuse in my shaking left hand.
"You see this!? If I light it we all die! Stop struggling!" Sharp pain radiates from my right knee, I grunt and look down to see the yellow mare with her ass toward me and a ferocious look on her face.
"Let go of Betty you monster!" I step back to avoid the next buck, the pink mare apparently called 'betty' stops struggling as much after my words. There's entrances to the carriage behind me and in front of me, the windows are too small to jump out of with both me and Betty. My only leverage is the hostage and my bombs.
I take a few more limping steps back until I see the open door leading to the station, a surprised guard half way through stepping into the carriage freezes up. We lock eyes and I momentarily forget what I'm doing. The guard is whacked on the flank by the guy behind him and he leaps inside.
"Don't come any closer! You know what I'm holding! If you touch me I'm going to kill this pony!" My throat burns as I push the words out at the greatest volume and ferocity I can muster. Betty cries out and flails her head around, probably not fun to have someone scream into your ear about how you're going to be blown up.
The guard in front of me levels his spear but isn't quite sure if he's meant to stab me in my exposed legs or not. The yellow mare to my right is crying and banging her hooves into the carpet, frustrated she wants to help her friend but finds herself incapable of doing so.
I glance behind me and see another door, an escape. I transition the pipe to my left hand and reach behind me for the door handle with my right. The butt of the guard's spear makes contact with the pipe and it's forced out of my sweaty hand, clattering to the floor. The door opens and I leap backward without looking, reaching into the saddlebag for a replacement pipe bomb.
I land on hard stone, the air is forced from my lungs and the world spins, the yelling and screaming fades out a little as I dig around before feeling a conical piece of metal in my hand. I push myself back onto my feet before immediately being pushed back down again with a tackle.
Betty cries out in pain from the impact, the grey face of a guard looms over me as he tries to simultaneously pry the bomb and Betty away from me. I knee him in the stomach which causes him to wince, taking advantage of his pain I jab him in the chin with the top of the pipe and move to stand up.
The guard falls off of me with a dazed expression, Betty keeps screaming something over and over but my brain isn't taking the time to decipher it over everything else that's happening. I feel pressure against my right bicep and watch a guard from the doorway above me stab my arm with his spear.
I stumble back and pick a random direction before sprinting away. Mid stride I feel myself float off of the ground as a blue aura surrounds me. I'm fucked, the unicorn has me. My legs kick out for the floor but I can't reach it. Below me guards run to surround me from all direction, spears pointed up and yelling commands.
Betty triples her efforts to escape as she kicks into the air and jostles my body around with the force. I feel her being pulled downward but I keep my grip, Betty's screaming turns into one long shriek as she's stretched out from two different directions. My quivering left hand fishes for the string and pushes it up in front of the ruby still tied to my finger.
For a single moment the world pauses as I wonder if I really am going to die, if my entire two decades living has truly come to an end right here. The moment ends as I squeeze the ruby and the string lights up, the fire rapidly racing toward the end cap. The guards voices all overlap one another as they cry out.
I bring the pipe up to my face and close my eyes. Every sensation feels unreal. I feel like I'm dreaming and in just a second I'm going to wake up. The feeling of the metal in my hands disappears and a dull boom cuts over the chaotic soundscape around me.
I open my eyes to see the pipe bomb is in fact gone, so is Betty. I'm floating a few meters in the air encircled by what feels like a hundred spear wielding horses. I'm not going to prison. I pull out another pipe bomb but before I can grab the fuse in my left hand it disappears in a green flash.
My eyes go wide as reality hits me like a ton of bricks. I failed. I'm going to prison for the next few months and then I'm going to die anyway.
I fill my lungs and let out all my emotions, "FUUUUUCK!" The world starts to melt together and collapse around me. My body goes fuzzy and all the noise starts being overtaken by the droning hiss of tinnitus. I close my eyes and sleep.
Author's Note
Thanks for reading. I'm not sure whether the story will continue from here, if it doesn't then know I originally intended for Aiden to die here.
Criticism would be greatly appreciated, if there's something I wrote that you think is shit or stupid let me know and if I agree I'll edit it. I wouldn't mind some ideas for how to proceed from here too, although I've got a general idea of what that'll be. Rest assured this won't end up being one of those 300K word HiE sims you've seen around. I know what I'll be doing and it will be much more focused.
