Starlight could not believe she was here again. Caught in the tiny space between fight and flight.

Smoke was in her throat, and a ragged piece of concrete trembled in her hand.

Her opponent was covered in knotted muscles, and a layer of splintered wooden armor on his limbs. He wore a flannel shirt and a stetson hat, and despite the holes that Starlight had punched in his body, he seemed nowhere close to going down.

She was facing down against another powerful foe, but she was well and truly alone this time. If she couldn’t turn the tables, she would be knocked out and dragged away to who knows where for who knows what purpose.

Nothing about her role had ever been easy, the last few months had been nothing but setback after setback, muddled plans, rising threats, and it all started because a man with a strange amount of magical power couldn’t stop himself from sticking his dick in an invader from another world.

Sometimes she returned to that first night when Buck and Adagio stood outside Sunburst’s door, dripping wet and trying to act nonchalant. She understood immediately what was going on, but she had no power to change it. She could have tried to capture Adagio, but chasing that witch without proper preparation was suicidal. She could have appealed to Buck and told him all the reasons why he should stay away.

If she had her hands on a piece of quartz in that instant, she could have bubbled Adagio in a forcefield.
But to what end? She was brimming with power, then. Power she had to have taken from Buck. Adagio could have boiled the blood in Starlight’s veins with a snap of her finger.

Even if Starlight could survive a real fight with Adagio, what would she do if she captured her? What if her sisters came looking? What plan could possibly justify the risk?

Adagio had everyone fooled, save for Starlight and Sunburst. The social monster had snaked her way back into the group’s good graces, but Starlight knew that she was up to something.

She was always up to something. Right?

Everything Adagio had done so far, it all had to boil down to her ambition. Buck had a target on his back, and Adagio was protecting her interest. She could not be trusted under any circumstances.

So why was it that Starlight breathed a sigh of relief as she heard a pair of feet touch down on the creaking floorboards behind her?

Finally, someone of a respectable competency to fight beside. That was the thought.

Sunburst was wonderful and he did his best, but he was too timid and too inept at complex magic. Scootaloo was fresh and very keen on stabbing things, but she was preoccupied. Adagio could finish this fight instantly.

And so, even as Starlight heard the portal fizzle out, she was filled with hope. With Adagio here, the fight was over. And that feeling of relief made Starlight’s skin crawl.

And then Buck spoke, and fresh anxiety blasted through Starlight’s brain. In her heart of hearts, Starlight had hoped for the witch.

“Are you fightin’ a demon cowboy in here?” Buck said.

She had gotten the jester.

Buck squinted through the burning apartment, waving at the smoke in front of his face.

The man in the stetson hat smiled, and his arms ignited like logs in the fireplace.

“Well, lookie here. It's a package deal!" The man laughed and charged forward, scattering Starlight and Buck in different directions.

"Yow! This guy's all lit up! What the hell is going on in here?"

"What are you doing here!?"

"Whaddya mean what am I doin’? Me and Adagio were comin’ in to help you!" Buck shouted as he ran from a flaming fist.

A bolt of mana slapped into the man's shoulder, but it barely made him stumble as he turned his attention back to Starlight.

“Well, where is she!?” A window shattered as Starlight barely dodged a blow.

“I dunno! I guess she didn’t make it through!”

"Fine, fine, I won't complain!" Starlight said.

“Okay, okay, okay! Whaddya need?” Buck said.

“Mana transference! You’ve been practicing, right? Give me a top off before he gets back up!”

"Okay, uh, I wish you'd get some power, I wish you'd get some power…HAH!" Buck said, before slapping Starlight on the back.

Nothing happened.

"Okay, I'm complaining. What the hell was that!?" Starlight said.

"RAAH!" The burning man came at them again, and Buck only escaped a caved-in head because Starlight pushed him aside.

"Well, shit. I guess 'dagio was right!" Buck said, squinting at the man. "Hey, don't I know you from somewhere?"

"What are you talking about!? Do something! Use your crazy pink mana to burn him up!"

“I’d like to see that!” The man said.

Starlight fired off another volley of arcane bolts, and the man covered his face, chunks of wood falling from his arms as the shots landed. Another quartz crystal disintegrated.

"I think he's plenty burnt already, Glimglam! I don't think my magic works unless 'dagio's around!"

Buck extended a hand nervously. He tried to get something going, but nothing came out.

"Fine, if you can’t do magic, can you at least help me fight him?" Starlight shouted.

The man slowly stepped forward through the barrage of projectiles. The floor creaked and cracked beneath each smoldering step, sending chunks of wood up his legs and back to layer over his arms.

“I, uh, what’re we dealing with?”

“Earth pony! He’s very strong and he’s shrugging off hits just like the last cloak we fought!”

Buck and Starlight separated once again as a blazing roundhouse kick swung at Buck’s ankles.

“And the quadrant!?

“Order/Telluric! He’s using the wood in this building to armor up, and a fire he lit to make things worse!”

“Wait, if he’s using the house as a weapon, doesn’t that mean there’s less-OH SHIT!”

Buck shrieked away just as a burning wooden gauntlet roared past his head like a rogue cannon ball. It crashed through a window and was not seen again.

“I get the feelin’ you kids ain’t takin’ this test all that serious-like. Maybe I oughta turn up the heat.” The man scowled.

Suddenly, the sounds of screams came from somewhere else in the building.

"I thought this building was supposed to be abandoned!" Starlight shouted. The man stopped, suddenly looking bewildered.

"It is!"

"Did you dumb motherfuckers light a building on fire without checking for squatters!?" Buck coughed.

"I'm going to go save those people! Hold him off until I get back!" Starlight said.

"Wait, what!?"

"Sunburst told me you got into street fights back in college! You'll be fine!" Starlight said, running down the hall.

Buck moved to block the door that Starlight had run through, but the man didn't move to chase her.

"Aren't you gonna try and get through me?" Buck said with a grimace. He started to move carefully, but the man stood still as a statue.

"Nah. It's better I let her get those folks clear.”

"Wait, you care about that?"

“This here fight’s between us; ain’t nobody needs to get kilt for no reason.”

“That’s…that’s pretty reasonable actually.”

“Besides, I can catch that Starlight no problem once I’ve got you.”

“You know our names? Wait, shit, no, I’m not about to let you catch me!”

"I weren't askin' permission; Purple Prose." The man charged with a wild swing. Buck took it straight on the chin and stumbled to the floor.

“Fuck! Ow!” Buck said, rolling away, clutching his face.

“Gonna have to knock you out if you don’t stop movin’!” The man shouted with a floorboard-crunching stomp.

"Okay, cool, okay, cool, okay what’re we doin’?!" Buck mumbled, scrambling through the trash. He turned and tried to make something come out of his hand and took a shot to the gut, then the face for his trouble.

“Fuck! Hold up, hold up, can we talk about this!?” Buck scrambled, trying to dip and dodge around the burning blows. His hand sparked with light for just a moment, but nothing came out.

“What was all that about street fightin’? Didn’t yer daddy ever teach you to throw a punch?"

“I never said I won those fights!” Buck shouted, throwing a glass bottle as he ran for the door.

He was yanked backward by the back of his tank top and thrown to the floor.

“Is this really the kid that everyone’s all worked up about?” The man growled, smashing his fist into the wood as Buck rolled away. “All that magic, all that potential, and all you can do is run?”

“Seems to be workin’ so far!” Buck said, tossing a handful of cigarette butts and paper trash, which quickly burned to cinders as the man slapped them away.

“Come on, son! Where’s your conviction? You know what? Maybe I will go downstairs and get that girl, instead.”

“What!?”

“Maybe I’m gonna go and kill whoever’s been livin’ in this dump while I’m at it.” The man said, his eyes suddenly glowing like pale orange embers.

“Oh, fuck off!” Buck said, but the man pivoted suddenly and smacked him to the floor with a backhand. Buck rolled and patted at the flames which bloomed on his shirt while the man turned to leave.

“You ain't worth my time.”

“Shazam!” Buck shouted, and a bright spark lit the room. The face of Buck’s blazing assailant was surrounded by odd, buzzing phantasms. Some of them seemed to be gibbering faces, some of them were ghosts, or shaking asses or frolicking animals, but all of them were cartoonish and glowing a crimson red.

“What the hell is this?” The man said, swatting at the fancies floating around his head.

“I did it. I did it! Wait, it’s red. Why is it red?” Buck said.

“You call this an attack!?”

"Shit, I dunno, is it working?” Buck said, legging it for the hallway.

The man crashed through a wall, chasing Buck even as the little illusions turned into flying middle fingers, then stars.

Adagio strolled briskly across the CCU parking lot. For some reason beyond her comprehension, a trio of rats skittered near her feet, stared up at her, then disappeared under a nearby car.

Adagio was disheveled and thoroughly nettled, but she slid back into her calculating countenance once she spied Ditzy Doo stomping toward her, teeth gritted.

“What did you do with Buck? Where is he!?” Ditzy demanded.

“I have to assume he’s involved with that.” Adagio pointed. An ugly black smokestack rose over the skyline from the eastern direction of the slums.

“What do you mean he’s involved!?”

“Not to worry. I’m going to go get him. You can sit here and look pretty until I bring him back. That was your plan for the day, right?”

“What!?” Ditzy looked to the plume of smoke, then to Adagio who shut the door of her sports car.

“No need to thank me,” Adagio said, before zooming off with a squeal of tires.

“HeyAdagiowaitIwannagetshotgunaaaAAAAWWW MAN!” Scootaloo whined, hopping forward on one leg.

Ditzy looked grimly at the smoke rising in the distance. Without a word or even a look at Scootaloo, she got into her own beaten-up sedan and turned over the engine.

“Ditzy? You okay?” Scoots said.

“I’m going after him!”

“What?”

“You want to be there too, right? Just in case you can help?”

“Well, yeah, even if it’s just to blow some air around, I might come in handy!”

“Then let’s go.”

“Are you sure about this?”

“He shouldn’t even…we shouldn’t have come out today. He said there might be trouble but we came out anyway, but now…now I just want to get Buck and bring him home. This isn’t for him. He’s not…this kind of thing just isn’t for him. He’s sensitive. You know?”

“Uh…sure! Let’s get going!”

“Right.”

Buck could feel the flames following as he dashed down the hallway. Another wall crashed open, and the mocking gruff of the burning man called through it. Despite the imminent peril, Buck’s brain was working methodically. Calmly.

He just had to keep living and breathing, and he'd eventually get to go home with Ditzy and laugh this whole thing off.

“Where’re ya goin’ boy!? Didn’t you wanna talk!?” The man shouted.

“Nope nope nope!” Buck said.

Buck’s chest was burning, but his legs were strong. As long as he kept breathing, he wouldn’t die, but how long could he keep scrambling around before this whole place fell down?

It didn’t matter. He didn’t matter, really. There were people in here, and as long as he kept buying time, Starlight could use that time to save them. The walls were thin enough that Buck could hear Starlight shouting somewhere in the blaze.

Buck pulled his phone, dialing on the run. Maybe he could call Sunburst! Sunburst would know what to do!

Buck turned a corner and saw the hazy outline of a staircase just up ahead. If he got low, he’d have a better chance of surviving the fire. That was a thing, right? Rising heat, rising smoke?

Buck heard crashing behind him.

"Come on, Sunburst, come on, pick up!"

"Buck? Is that you? What's going on!?"

"Holy shit, Sunburst, okay, okay, I'm gettin' chased by a dude that's literally on fire, tryin' not to get cooked! How do you deal with someone in the Order/Telluric quadrant!?"

"Uh, usually that quadrant uses very little mana, but they depend on materials in their environment! So, if you want to beat them, you have to remove them from that element!"

"But the whole-ass building is on fire!"

"You have to get out of there!"

Before he could jump the banister, it crumbled under another propelled wooden fist, leaving Buck to skid to a stop or else risk getting impaled on the jagged wood that had been an escape.

“Did you have any kinda plan besides runnin’ like a girl?” The burning cowboy growled, taking a menacing step forward. He was tensed, a bit crouched, ready to pounce.

“Uh, well, uh, lemme think about it, oh, here’s a fun one! Do you know what barf tastes like?”

“What?”

“I do!” Buck laughed, wiggling his fingers.

The man suddenly bent over, retching as his mouth sparked pink. The fancies that were annoying him evaporated. The man clapped his hands over his mouth, trying to hold back the surge of sheer acidic disgust coming up his throat.

There was a sharp crack as a chunk of former banister came down on the man’s head, dropping him to the floor.

“Hah! Gotcha!” Buck said, dropping the plank of wood. He turned to run, but an armored fist clutched his ankle.

“Ah shit, he’s got me.”

The breath burst out of Buck’s mouth as a nearby threshold became acquainted with his lower spine. He kicked his legs, trying to wriggle away even as he groaned and grabbed at his back. He saw his phone clatter from his pocket and onto the floor.

“Kid, just give it up. I’d prefer it if I could getchu outta here without breakin’ yer back.” The man spat. His smile had turned to a grimace.

“Fucking hell, what’re you made of that you can just no-sell gettin’ beaned in the head?”

“How ‘bout I tell you if you agree to come quietly?”

Buck tried to snatch his phone up, but the man stomped it into smithereens.

"Godamnit, how many phones am I gonna go through messing with you dickheads!?"

"Aww...what a shame, what a shame!"

Buck snapped his fingers.

The stetson turned pink.

“You’ve done it now, boy.”

Buck barely managed to roll away as the man’s heel came for his head.

“Whassa matter Pops, can’t take a joke!?” Buck was on his feet, huffing for breath, smiling despite his bloody nose.

“I’m disappointed.”

“‘Scuse me?”

“Are these cheap parlor tricks all you can do? That mess at the fair must’a been a fluke. You ain’t much of a wild card at all. You ain’t much’a nuthin’.”

“Uh…does that mean you’re gonna let me go?”

“Naw, son. It just means I won’t waste my time. You might be more useful to us dead than alive.”

“What?”

“I still gotta get that there Starlight girl, so I’ll make this quick.”

“What!?”

The man’s armored limbs bristled with splinters as layers of wood crawled up from the floor, which was looking older and more weathered with each passing second. The flames grew brighter and hotter, stinging Buck’s eyes, and before he could say anything, The man rocketed across the room, wreathed in fire.

A sleek purple sports car parked very illegally in the fire lane. She took care not to park beneath the line of spectating pigeons that were perched on the telephone wires just adjacent to the street corner.

First Adagio smelled the smoke, then she saw the flames coming out of two ratty apartment buildings, and she tasted Buck's bewildered desperation. No time for subtlety.

“Buuuck! Are you up there?” Adagio called.

There was a loud crash. About half of Buck's barrel-shaped torso poked out of a very destroyed window, caught in a large, wooden gauntlet. He had a dazed look on his face.

“Ughh...Will you chill the fuck out!?” Buck shouted. There was a loud thump as Buck was dragged back into the smoke.

“Buck!?”

Adagio saw a flash of reddish light and suddenly Buck was at the window again, coughing.

“Adagio!? Issat you down there!?”

“I’m here, Buck! Let me help you!”

“Yeah, sure, sure, uh, look, this guy is really-GAHH!” A wooden fist smashed through the wall near Buck, who screamed girlishly before appearing at another window. “-this guy’s kinda on my bumper! Can you do somethin’ about the fire?” Buck said, before getting pulled back in.

Adagio noticed that his words were punctuated by a glowing red exclamation point floating near his head.

“Are you sure? I could just come up there!” Adagio called.

“I got this!” Buck shouted from the smoke. There was a crash.

“I can taste when you’re lying, Buck!”

“Don’t worry about me! There’s people trapped in the building next door! Just put out the damn fire!” Buck passed by the window repeatedly, running from a man with flaming wooden arms.

“I’m going to need a bit of mana! Can you reach out the window, please?” Adagio called.

“Okay, random bullshit go!” Buck turned sharply and a stream of animated doodles erupted from his hands. The burning man reacted as if he’d been hit by a burst of confetti, trying to wave the irritating illusions away.

Buck dove for the window, stretching out as far as he could.

“Here!” Buck shouted Adagio held out her arms as if to embrace Buck, and a thin stream of pink flame passed between them.

Adagio suppressed the urge to moan as she drank in Buck’s affection. It was like rich hot chocolate, even in this frantic circumstance.

“Make it rain, babe!”

“Gladly.” Adagio hummed a quick staccato tune, twirling a finger. The hydrant shook for a moment, then the cap blasted off in front of a violent torrent, which lashed upward like a serpent to spray the burning buildings with a long hiss.

“Come here! Come here! Why don’t you just stand still!? You gotta be the most annoyin’ candidate I’ve ever had to rustle up!” The man said.

“Ah well, I’m sure you can tell me all about it once we cool you off!” Buck’s laughter was cut off by a vice-like grip around his neck. His feet left the ground as he patted frantically at the smoldering gauntlet.

“Yeah? And how’re you gonna do that?” The man growled, raising a fist that Buck was sure would knock him out.

“Like this.” Buck gasped in a breath. The two were blasted off their feet by a powerful jet of water. The room flooded quickly, and while Buck splashed and rolled, he heard a creaking sound that was quickly growing familiar.

Buck sat up, coughing.

The floor creaked louder.

He put his hands out, trying not to shift his weight. He looked around and saw that the floor was pockmarked with holes and gashes from all the wood that had come up.

"Okay...step light...let's just take our time," Buck muttered.

The gruff man spluttered out a mouthful of water. He looked over and glared at Buck.

"Hey man, I know what you're thinkin', but be cool!"

The man sneered and rolled over, but before he could charge again, the floor groaned in agony, buckled inward, then finally collapsed in a cacophonous crash.

Back at ground level, Adagio dragged the torrent across every bloom of flame she could see.

Despite the earthshaking racket that came from the building next door, Adagio tried to keep her focus on the remaining blaze.

He wouldn’t die in there. She had already saved him. He’d be fine as long as he didn’t get captured, and even if he did, she would simply take him back. He was fine. It was fine. Adagio had everything under control. Buck was right. The fire had to be dealt with first. Soon she would deal with this mild annoyance and go to his side, and he would finally understand that he needed her.

He just had to take a little beating first.

A door slammed open, and Starlight Glimmer stepped out onto the sidewalk, surrounded by a shimmering shield of cyan force. Her clothes were slightly singed, and she was being followed closely by a small group of people in dirty, tattered clothes.

“Finished holding hands with the rabble?” Adagio said.

“Shouldn’t you be up there protecting your interest?” Starlight said, rolling her eyes.

“My “interest” asked me very nicely to spray this building to prevent anything or anyone else from catching flame. A fire that I have to assume you started?”

“You wish.” Starlight said. The shield of force surrounding her shimmered, then blinked out of existence. “Oh brilliant.” Starlight groaned.

Screams could be heard coming from the building she had just exited. Screams for help.

“Adagio?”

“Yeeees~?”

“I’m out of components for this situation. Could you….”

“Go ooooon~”

“Could you please use your water powers to help me get in there and save lives!? There’s no time to argue!”

“Well, since you asked so nicely.”

Adagio hummed a gentle tune, and the roaring water wrapped around her and Starlight, forming a protective bubble. The flames hissed as the pair stepped into the threshold, but Adagio lingered for just a moment.

A screech of tires signaled the approach of her rival, who looked about frantically as she pulled up in her ratty old car. Ditzy Doo caught Adagio with an off-center glare.

“Better hurry,” Adagio smirked and nodded toward the adjacent building.

“Okay…ribs? Ribs’re good…legs? Not broken, cool, cool…arms? Shoulder? Good…not busted, just bruised…” Buck mumbled, trembling as he rose from the pile of flinders that used to be a floor.

“Hurts like fuck, but nothin’ itching…must’ve missed the insulation. Hey, Grizzly Adams, you alive in here!?”

Silence was the only answer.

“Shit. Shit, shit, shit, did we just kill a guy? Did I just kill a guy!?”

Buck nearly fell over as he walked to a nearby door. His leg was caught under the rubble.

“Okay, just need to get outta here, figure it out later. Don’t panic…don’t panic…” Buck mumbled frantically, pushing away the debris encasing his leg. He was stuck on something splintered, so he grabbed a loose pipe and tried to pry it free.

Suddenly, the rubble shifted.

Buck tried to run, but his leg was held fast in a wooden gauntlet. Emerging from the dusty pile was the man he’d been fighting, but he was missing his hat, and about half his face, revealing a bloody skeleton’s grin.

“You didn’t think I’d just let you go, didja!?”

“AAAAAGGHHH!” Buck screamed, whacking the man over and over again with the pipe until he finally scrambled free.

“Well hey now, why’re you so scared all of a sudden? Didn’t ya wanna talk it out a minute ago?” The man said, his back snap-cracking loudly as he sluggishly stood upright. In the place of one of his arms hung ragged ribbons of flesh. He was pierced all over by chunks of wood and rebar.

“You’ve got a fucking arm off!” Buck shouted.

“Ah, well, that ain’t no worry. Let me just…” The man groaned and the pieces of wood perforating him swam along his form, replacing his arm with a bulky, jagged one. Steam rose off his form, but it seemed ignition was out of his reach.

“What the fuck are you?” Buck said. He extended a hand and tried to fire off another stream of nonsense, but all he got was sparks.

“I’m just an old-fashioned family man, doin’ what he’s gotta. And you? You’re just a boy that went and got in over his head. I’m gonna give you one more chance to give it up, or I’m gonna have to-”

Buck had already started running.

“...do this the hard way.”

The man charged.

"A long tunnel of churning water snaked through the burning building. Starlight kicked doors and ordered people out while Adagio made sure that the flames couldn't reach them.

"Does all of this seem a bit too coordinated to you?" Starlight said.

"Yes. They triggered an awakening, then tried to divide the heaviest hitters in the ensuing chaos. Two rage-bolstered changelings for me, and a single assailant for you. It seems we've effectively nettled our mutual foe."

"I guess that means they're taking us seriously now."

"That must be a new experience for you."

Starlight scowled around to see Adagio staring at the wall, lightly conducting her spell with a wagging finger.

"...Are you worried?"

"Not in the slightest. Buck is far more capable than any of you give him credit for."

"You just have this look on your face like your pet cat ran away."

"Do you have a point?"

"...Okay, look. We're already outnumbered, and outgunned. We need him if we're going to win this. You know that, and I know that."

"Yes. So what?"

"So, Sunburst tells me that Buck is an overthinker. He needs to be told things directly to be sure about them. He's pretty dumb that way."

"And?"

"If you ask him earnestly to join our team, he might seriously consider it."

"Oh, I see. You want me to coerce him into this little crusade because you don't have the diction to do it yourself. Is this your version of cooperation?"

"I'll do whatever I have to in order to protect innocent people from these monsters. Even if it means working with a monster myself."

"For now?"

"For now."

Another group of people shuffled past Starlight and Adagio. A few of them were small children, looking in awe at the tunnel of surging water.

"I can offer a strategy or two, but what you need to understand is the biggest thing holding Buck back is that woman he's with. As long as he needs her permission, he'll never join in this fight willingly."

"You can't honestly expect me to try and break them up!"

"I don't expect much of anything from you." Adagio grinned, taking in Starlight's indignant fury like a decadent treat. "She's holding him back, in more ways than one, and you know it. We won't get anywhere with Buck until little miss Ditzy Doo loosens his collar. She is keeping him weak."

"She's just trying to protect him. You know better than anyone that Ditzy Doo is fierce when she has the right motivation."

"So when you pitch the idea of Buck fighting on our side, do you expect that she'll try to 'protect him' from you?"

To that, Starlight had no answer.

Ditzy grimaced as she stepped out of her car. The whole sidewalk was frosted in fossilized bird shit. Ditzy opened her trunk and sifted through the odds and ends.

“What’re you doing?” Scootaloo said from the backseat.

“Whatever I can!” Ditzy Doo said.

She had a jack, old toys that Dinky had forgotten about, even an emergency kit and foldable crutches in case she happened to fall badly.

Underneath it all was Ditzy’s destroyed shield and her hammer; Marriane.

“You probably shouldn’t get on that ankle, but here. I’m going to go on ahead.” Ditzy passed Scootaloo a crutch, and without another word, she ran up to the building that Adagio indicated.

“Buck, are you in there!?”

The door and windows were boarded up, but Ditzy could hear the sounds of activity inside. Things were breaking and Buck was screaming.

Ditzy felt herself slipping back to a horrible memory. She couldn’t freeze up now. She needed to fight. Just like before.

Ditzy raised Marriane, and just as she started to swing at the door, she heard a crash coming from the alley nearby.

And there he was, beneath a fire escape that was ironically unused.

Buck was covered in glass, on the ground, and groaning. A window on the wall next to him was shattered open.

“Come on man…you know this…jumpin’ through windows instead of breakin’ them first is some double dumbass shit…” Buck groaned.

“Buck!” Ditzy’s heart soared. He was okay! He was beaten up and his shirt was all torn again, but he was okay!

“Muffin!? What’re you…wait, no, wait, Ditzy, don’t come!”

The wall smashed open as if a wrecking ball had hit it.

Ditzy saw a demon step out into the alley, steaming with heat and fury, battered and torn all over and smiling through a destroyed face.

The memory returned. Fire, terror, and a monster. But this time would be different.

This time, Ditzy could fight back.

“C’mere, boy!” The monster lunged at Buck.

“DON’T YOU TOUCH HIM!”

And in a burst of white wind, Ditzy was there. In the space of a scream, Marriane came down and crunched into the monster’s back, taking him down to a knee.

“Holy shit, you actually hurt him!”

“Buck, get behind me!” Ditzy said. She didn't seem to notice as a pair of equine ears flickered on her head, or the pair of feathery wings on her back, which were more air and light than physical.

Buck was struck still by how beautiful she looked.

“Ain’t got time for this! Come here!” The man swiped sluggishly at Buck as he squeezed by.

“I think he’s slowin’ down! Hey, does this guy look familiar to you?” Buck said, trying to focus up. A fireburst kicked the zombie toward them.

“I said get behind me! That thing is dangerous!” Ditzy moved to intercept a strike with Marianne. The smoldering wooden fist thudded into the hammer. Buck could swear he saw Ditzy smirk.

“You better believe it, girly!” Roared the man. Each punch he threw was propelled forward by a blast of flame at his elbow, his whole body rocketing forward in a wild swing.

“What does it want!?” Ditzy said, desperately blocking and dodging.

“He’s tryin’ to catch Starlight!”

“That doesn't make any sense!”

"No, I mean Starlight Glimmer!"

"Okay!"

Clang, clang, clang! Ditzy's hammer swung defensively, parrying the zombie's desperate blows.

“And I’m pretty sure he’s tryna kill me!” Buck said, holding a hand out, gathering flickers of red aura in his palm.

“What!? What'd you do? Why's his hat pink?

The man swayed unsteadily between swings, squinting with his remaining good eye, searching for an opening.
The man feinted another blow, but this time he stopped the punch short and held up an open palm covered in a grey aura. Ditzy braced herself.

“Gotchu now!” The man laughed, grabbing Ditzy by the shoulder, but his grin faded as the aura petered out.

“Ka-pow!” Buck fired off another stream of red fancies, which swarmed the man in a maddening cloud of little flapping birds, dancing forms, and pink sparkles. Ditzy took that opening to deliver another vicious blow with Marriane.
The man stumbled back, bumping against the walls of the alley as he flailed.

“I know that one! That’s a drain magic spell! It’s the same thing Adagio does by touch, and like, through her mouth? It’s complicated.”

“So he’s a leech like her?”

“No! Yes? Maybe! Look, that spell didn’t work on you! Did you bring my necklace?”

“Yeah, it’s here!” Ditzy said, pulling the dark green stone from her skirt.

“You put pockets in there!? God, Ditzy, you’re amazing!”

“Oh, well, hah, that’s really sweet of you to say, I mean-”

“GAAAH!” The man roared. Ditzy and Buck ducked as a trashcan lid came flying at their heads.

“Okay, no time, no time! My magic’s been acting strange this whole fight, so I gotta get creative!” Buck quickly wrapped the cord around the face of the hammer.

“What’re you doing?”

“I think this’ll work!”

“You think what’ll work!?”

The monster man came again, charging even as flames gathered at his elbow, ready to deliver a haymaker like a cannon blast.

“Just hit him!”

Ditzy brought Marianne around.

There was a vicious crunch, like an axe biting into a tree, and then the wooden arm fell to pieces.

The man’s fury and confidence folded in an instant.

“Huh,” Buck said.

“Time to go.” The man said. Flames exploded from beneath his feet, propelling him into the air over Buck and Ditzy’s heads in a great leap.

“Sorry to cut’n run, kids, but you’re more trouble than you’re worth!”

The man landed behind Buck and Ditzy and immediately ran for the mouth of the alleyway, just as Scootaloo hobbled around the corner.

“Hey Ditzy, I know it's not the safest, but I wanted to see if I could AHH!” Scootaloo screamed, and a blast of air panicked out of her hand.

It knocked Scootaloo on her ass and sent the revenant flying in the opposite direction, where he smacked his head on the fire escape, then thudded to the ground, motionless.

Buck and Ditzy looked at Scootaloo, who was no less bewildered.

“Uh…sneak attack?”

“...heh. hahahAHAHAHAH!” A hysterical laugh exploded out of Buck’s mouth. Ditzy looked at him, shaking with nerves, but Buck’s smile caught on her face, and soon she was giggling with him.

“Ditzy, you were amazing in there!”

“Huh?”

“You were on some Xena shit with that hammer! How did you know I was over here!? God damn, the way you swing that thing...” Buck said. He held Ditzy by the shoulders, rambling and laughing. “Hey, hey, Ditzy? Can I kiss you?”

“What? Now?”

“Well, yeah! You’re really damn hot right now, and we just survived, whatever the hell that was, and-”

Ditzy closed the distance and met Buck’s lips with hers. It was nothing like any of the times they’d kissed before. It was assertive and thirsty. It was a lot like the way Adagio always kissed Buck, but Ditzy touched his cheeks gently and pressed her breasts against his chest. When she pulled away, she looked just as shocked as Buck.

“That, uh…where’d that come from?” Buck said, then he whined as Ditzy smacked his shoulder. “Ow! Why!?”

“Do you have any idea how worried you made me!?” Ditzy huffed, putting her hands on her hips.

“I’m sorry, Muffin, but Starlight was in trouble!”

“So why didn’t you just send Adagio in!? Isn’t she supposed to be on your side right now, or something?”

“Well, we ran at the portal at the same time and-holy shit, what would’ve happened if that closed on me? Holy shit.”

“Oh gosh, your face! That guy really did a number on you…” Ditzy pulled a handkerchief from her pocket and started gently cleaning Buck up.

“Uh, guys…?” Scootaloo said, getting to her feet. Buck and Ditzy seemed to be in their own little world. She couldn’t help but notice that Ditzy was smiling as she tried to wipe the ash off Buck’s face.

“There you are!”

Adagio ran around the corner, nearly knocking Scootaloo to the ground all over again. An orb of water was floating just above her hand, ready to lash out, but it splashed to the floor as Adagio saw Ditzy doting on Buck. Adagio’s concern hardened into a business-like ambivalence, like flipping a switch.

“Ah. So you managed to take down the cloak, then?”

“Scoots did! It was hilarious! But not before Ditzy fought that dude, and I, I think I figured some shit out. Whatever this guy is, he doesn’t give a shit about tanking hits, but he’s runnin’ on mana.

“As in his body?”

“Yeah! Like you, ‘dagio.”

“I’ll thank you not to compare me to this rabble, Buck. Starlight?”
Starlight ran around the corner.

“Weeee should go. The fire department will be here any minute, and I don’t want to have to pay bail if we all get arrested for arson.”

“How is that even an option for you? Nevermind. What’re we gonna do with gruesome over here?” Buck said.

“We’re gonna to let the pros handle this and go home. Come on, Buck.” Ditzy said, taking Buck’s hand.

“Hold up, Muffin. This could be important!” Buck said.

An evil grin curled on Adagio’s face as Ditzy frowned.

“Well, I-woah! What did you do to him!?” Starlight said.

“Oh dear. Buck, I thought you might be semi-capable in this situation, but I didn’t think you’d mangle your assailant, you beast!” Adagio said with a fresh smile.

“Hol’ up, now, I didn’t do any of that! Okay, I hit him with, like a pipe, but I didn’t take his damn arm off! That was an accident!”

“I see you took my ‘melt people’s faces off’ suggestion seriously. Yeesh.” Starlight said.

“That wasn’t me!”

“Well, how did this happen, then?”

“He fell! We both fell when the floor gave out, but he took the worst of it!”

“We need to get you to a doctor, Buck. You might be hurt and just not know it!” Ditzy said.

“In this economy? Can’t you just cast a heal on me like last time?” Buck said, looking at Starlight.

“We don’t have time to argue! Buck and Ditzy, can you please drag this…thing to one of the cars so we can get out of here?” Starlight said. Ditzy glared at her for a second, then sighed.

“Fine.” Ditzy said, and with that, she and Buck hauled the old ghoul away from the scene.

As they piled into Ditzy’s car, the poor folks that had just lost their home looked on in shock.

“Hey, you guys, I’m really sorry about this place. I know what it’s like to lose a home, and-”

“Buck, come on, we have to go!” Starlight said.

“And I know there’s this homeless shelter up on third avenue that’ll put you up for a little while. Ask for Thorax, and tell him that Buck sent you and you’ll be alright.”

Sirens were approaching from a distance.

“Buck!” Starlight shouted.

“And uh, y’all didn’t see nothin’, right?”

“We won’t tell nobody!” Said a little girl, who’s far more emaciated mother took protectively by the wrist.

“Alright. Y’all take care of yourselves.”

It was twenty minutes earlier, and in a little store on the west side of Canterlot, everything was quiet. The shop was closed on Saturday, so its owner took her time dusting shelves, adjusting displays, and rearranging products.

Business, as always, had been spectacular, due in no small part to reliable customers and useful connections, but one had to wonder how long it would last.

There just wasn’t any challenge in the game anymore. That darling sweetheart upstairs seemed to have found a bit of a calling, and it made the wizened shopkeep yearn for younger, more adventurous days.

She was proud, truly, and very glad of the soundproofing that had been applied to her tenant’s bedroom, but it left her feeling that maybe she was in need of a change of pace.

She needed to do something about this numb feeling where her passion used to be, otherwise, she might as well just curl up and die.

She had just finished sweeping up when she heard a frantic knocking at the back door.

“We’re closed at the moment, dear! Come back tomorrow between ten and six!”
The knocking grew louder and more frantic, blows from more than just two fists echoing through the store before ceasing all at once.

“Damn kids.”

The window shattered, and the scream to come was lost among the buzzing of wings and the hissing of toothy maws.

“Yes it’s on twentieth and still slightly on fire. No one saw us, except the people we saved. Will they talk? I doubt it, but I also doubt that anyone would believe them if they did. Squatters, yes. Might want to send someone around in case there were any witnesses. Right. Where? Understood.” Starlight said into her phone.

The quiet in Ditzy’s car was beyond awkward. Buck and Scootaloo sat on either side of what looked like a lightly napping corpse. It would take a while for the smell of smoke to wash out of Ditzy’s seats.

Buck had many questions as usual, but they were deafened by the most important one in his head; “Is Ditzy mad at me?” the answer was almost definitely yes, but she was numbly steering the car according to Starlight’s directions. He didn’t want to broach the subject; silence was always better than an argument, so he sat, staring out the window, trying to process everything that had happened.

After an agonizing stretch of quiet city roads, the gang pulled up on a discreet warehouse space near the eastern docks.

“Y’all realize that we look exactly like mobsters hauling a dead body?” Buck grumbled as he, Ditzy, and Starlight dragged the man through an unlocked door on the side of the warehouse.

“Don’t worry. This place is under constant surveillance, and no one is around to see us do this.” Starlight said. She procured some zip ties from a nearby crate and proceeded to tie the man’s remaining wrist to a pipe and his ankles together. “There. Now he won’t get away.”

“See, now, when you say shit like that is exactly when I start worrying. It makes me think of questions like; ‘What the fuck kind of influence does this organization have that they can have a casual crime warehouse on the east side?’ and ‘How many times has GlimGlam dragged a motherfucker into this warehouse in pieces because of magic?’” Buck said.

“You’re the one that broke him into pieces!” Starlight said,

“That wasn’t me!” Buck said.

“I thought you fought monsters? Like animals?” Ditzy said.

“We do! But just recently, the monsters have been people. This is also pretty new to me.”

“Is it?” Ditzy mumbled.

“What are you gonna do to this poor guy?” Buck said.

“Poor guy? He beat you bloody and tried to capture both of us!”

“That’s a point, but he doesn’t really seem like, uh, like villainous? It’s hard to explain.” Buck said.

“I’m going to ask him some questions.”

“Is anyone gonna fix my ankle?” Scootaloo said.

“Soon, Scootaloo. Before we get started, let’s go over what we know. This man is in the Order/Telluric quadrant. Earth pony. He wanted to capture me-”

“And me, I think, until he saw that my powers were kind of bunk,” Buck said.

“Bunk? What do you mean?”

“My aura was red instead of pink, for one.”

“In the absence of our connection, your aura turned red?” Adagio said, quickly scribbling in a notepad.

“Yeah, and it just sort of petered off after a bit, instead of exploding like usual!”

“Oh, well that makes perfect sense,” Adagio said.

“It does?” Ditzy said.

“Of course it does. Buck, I’ve been teaching you magic for weeks, and in that time I’ve watched you grow increasingly exhausted. You’re deprived, and emotionally drained. It only makes sense that your power would fizzle.”

“What are--wait, you knew that and you still let him fight alone!?” Starlight said.

“It was an accident, at first. I was confident that Buck would survive, due to his crafty nature. I also assumed that you would be there should he fail, and, accounting for your incompetence, I believed that Ditzy Doo would come to his defense should worse come to worst.”

“Hey! What about me?” Scoots huffed.

Adagio stroked Scootaloo's cheek and then her hair.

“I thought you would be preoccupied with your own mission, and yet you managed to position yourself just right to land the decisive blow of the conflict. You’ve impressed me, Little Birdie.”

“Oh geez, uh….hah…it was nothing?”

“What do you mean Buck is deprived?” Starlight said.

“I think you should ask his girlfriend about that.”

“Don’t start, Adagio.” Buck growled.

“Buck has been repressing himself for Ditzy Doo’s sake, all to maintain the illusion of a functional human pairing. Which means it’s only a matter of time before his magic flounders entirely.”

“Shut up,” Buck growled, but Adagio strolled up to him and poked at his chest to punctuate her words.

“You. Have. Physical. Needs. If you don’t maintain a sound heart and a sound mind, you’ll never gain control over your powers, and that is the truth. You can deny it, you can run away from it, but that is reality.”

“I said stop it! I don’t want to have this conversation right now!” Buck said. From the corner of his eye, he saw Ditzy looking absolutely mortified.

“And when will you be ready, Buck!?” Adagio exploded.

“Enough! You can bicker later! Adagio, can you wake him up?” Starlight said.

“If I must.” Adagio waved a hand, and the water bottle she was holding erupted in a seltzer stream that brought the maimed cowboy sputtering to consciousness.

“What in tarnation!? Uh, oh. Oh damn. I see. Y’all got me dead to rights.” Despite his mangled state, the man was oddly calm.

“I’m going to make this as simple as possible. I’m going to ask you questions, and you’re going to answer them.” Starlight said.

“Or what?” The man grinned.

“Jesus, I can’t look at his face when he talks,” Buck said, covering his mouth.

“Well that ain’t a problem, since I’m not tellin’ you nothin’ and I won’t be hangin’ around.” The man said.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Starlight said.

“It means, it won’t be long before I get loose. Whether I want to or not.”

“If we’re on a crunch for time, that’s all the more reason not to waste it.” Starlight pulled a small leather sack from her pocket, pouring some odd green dust into her palm.

“Woah, Woah, what the hell are you about to do!?” Buck said.

“It’s a minor mind control spell.”

“Mind control!?”

“It’s a modified motor mouth spell that will force him to tell the truth. This will get him to talk, so we can figure out our next move!”

“Wait, aren’t you supposed to be one of the good guys? You can’t just go fucking around with a man’s head! That’s a huge invasion of privacy! That’s gotta be against like, the magical geneva conventions, or whatever!”

Ditzy’s embarrassment blinkered into sheer panic for a moment.

“There’s no time for this! It won’t hurt him, and it's just for a little bit! He’s barely even human; look at him!” Starlight said.

“What the fuck? I know he’s all messed up, but he’s definitely a person under all that, right!?”

“I’m a human, yeah, I’ll tell you that.” The man said.

“You see!?”

“Don’t listen to him! Trust me, this is for the greater good. The sooner it's done, the sooner we can plan our next move, but he’s got critical information that we need, and I’m not going to waste this opportunity just because it makes you uncomfortable.”

Starlight raised her hand to her lips. The powder glowed with her cyan aura, and then she blew it at the captive cloak.

“NO!” Buck dove to stop the spell, but it was too late. He took the powder full in the face. He doubled over with a coughing fit, Ditzy running to pat his back.

“Why did you do that!? That was my only component for the spell!” Starlight said.

Buck looked up at Starlight, furious for a moment. Then his lips started moving and his words came out fast and filterless.

“I’m sorry Starlight, but when I was in school there was this girl who fucked with people’s memories, real sweetheart, can’t remember her name, but it was a real bad scene and when it got fixed it caused this blowback where everyone who got their memories altered had this feedback that actually put people down for a while. Like a bunch of us fell into comas, including me, and it was fucked up, and anyway, you can’t just dick around with people’s heads! That’s like textbook villainy, just ask Adagio!”

“Oh, yes, very villainous. You should be ashamed, Starlight!” Adagio laughed.

“And hey look, I know this guy came after us, but he let you run off to help save those folks, like, I don’t think he’s bad, I think he’s just doing what he’s got to do!”

“That’s about it, yep.” The man said.

“And I swear I know this guy from somewhere, right, like I’ve definitely seen him around town before, I just can’t-wait, why can’t I stop talking? Oh shit, oh shit, shit shit shit!”

“Buck, calm down. You may want to get something to gag yourself with while the spell wears off, otherwise you might-”

“I don’t keep porn on my laptop, it has its own solid-state drive I got as a birthday present a while ago, and even though its a terabyte, its already halfway full!”

“What?” Ditzy said.

“Ohhhh my~!” Adagio said.

“I lost my virginity at Camp Everfree while all that magic shit was going down!” Buck said.

The living corpses’ eyebrows flew up.

“What the hay?”

“Come on, Buck, let’s get you home, okay?” Ditzy said, taking Buck’s hand.

“I…I think Mrs. Cake is kind of hot! Even though she’s like really judgemental, I kinda wanna slap that ass around!”

“She’s old enough to be your mother!” Ditzy balked.

“Most of my clients have been older women! Before you, I couldn’t remember the last time a girl my age hit on me! It’s always gay guys and cougars, with no in-between!” Buck complained.

“Clients?” Adagio whispered.

“Wait, what about Adagio?” Scoots said.

“She’s like cougar-zilla! She’s like every cougar stereotype in one! She’s also got a little mole right next to her asshole, and I think it’s really cute.”

Adagio turned red all the way up to her ears.

Their captive started laughing.

“Get him out of here!” Starlight said.

“The first time me and Berry Punch went at it, she totally barfed all over my face while she was riding me, and that’s not even the grossest thing that’s happened to me during sex!”

“The first time!? Why would you go back for seconds?” Adagio said.

“Okay, okay, come on, Buck!” Ditzy said, pulling Buck by the arm.

“Ooh, ooh, me next! Uh…um, I’m actually from Australia!” Scootaloo said.

“I've been using Sunbursts' Netflix account for six years!” Buck slapped a hand over his mouth, but his diatribe exploded out from behind it. “I still haven’t finished Snow Crash! Shit. Shit, shit, shit. I think Demon Slayer is kind of middling, actually, but the anime really elevates it! I think that Ogres and Oubliettes is a little overrated, and I wish people would stop acting like it’s the only roleplaying game that exists!”

“Uh…I had a nasty threesome with Buck and Adagio, and I’m kinda having an existential crisis about it!” Scoots chimed in.

“WHAT!?” Ditzy shrieked.

“God damn it Scoots!” Buck said.

“When!?” Ditzy said, grabbing Buck’s collar.

“Not recently, not recently! Before we started dating, I swear! It was kind of a spur of the moment thing It was Adagio’s idea, but I got really into it after a bit!” Buck said, defensively.

“It was a wonderful night.” Adagio smirked.

“I dated one of the Rainbooms!” Buck said.

“You did not!?” Adagio balked.

“Anything else you feel like confessing?” Ditzy sighed, hands on her hips.

“How about that I love you? I haven’t told you that today.” Buck said. Adagio rankled.

“Buck…that’s really sweet, but I think-”

“How about how I think you’re beautiful, and even more so when you fight? How about how when you and Adagio fought, it gave me a thrill, even though I knew it was wrong, but I’ve never had anyone that was willing to fight over me and it was so strange, you were so hot out there, and I just didn’t want to say it because I know you hate all of this magic stuff, but it’s weird, it’s not what I thought it was, I mean magic has screwed my life up multiple times, but when I look at it as a craft, it’s, I dunno, it’s like any other art form, and I wish I could show you how beautiful it can be!”

“Wait, wait, what are you talking about?”

“Ditzy I love you. I love you so much, and that’s the truth! I want to see you happy, and I want to watch Dinky grow up and I want to be there for the both of you, because when we’re together, it feels like the whole world is on hold because all I want to do is hold your hand and talk about nothing. And…”

“Buck, please, you don’t have to-”

“And you make me so damn happy, it kills me how selfish I feel when I want something more, but I do! I want to be that guy that you need and give you the love you deserve but I’m not gettin’ what I need, and it’s not your fault, Ditzy, it’s not your fault! I’m horny! I’m way hornier than you think I am, all the time! When I come on to you, I never want to push, because you’re trying your best but you’ve got this trauma, and I know what that’s like, Muffin, I do, and it’s not fair, but I feel so guilty when we get intimate, but not as guilty as I feel about the fact that I almost kissed Adagio earlier this week!”

For a moment, no one said anything. Buck looked like he’d just dropped a priceless jewel into a swamp, stammering, covering his mouth, trying to stop the words from coming. Ditzy stood, fists clenched, staring at the ground.

“I’m going home.”

“Ditzy, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-” Buck was cut off by a gentle finger to his lips.

“Don’t. Get yourself fixed up, and we can talk about this later. But right now, I’m going home.” Ditzy said, tears welling up in her eyes. She turned to glare at Adagio, then Starlight, before walking briskly out of the warehouse. Her engine turned over, and then she was gone.

“Can someone give me something to gag myself with? Before I tell my life story?” Buck said, even as he tried to cover his mouth.

Starlight awkwardly produced a bit of rope from an open crate. Even as he complained about how shitty the day went, Buck pulled one of his socks off, stuffed it in his mouth, and then proceeded to tie the rope around his head. His words were muffled enough to be unintelligible, and so satisfied, he sat down on a box and put his head in his hands.

Scootaloo sat next to him and patted his back.

Starlight and Adagio looked at each other for a moment, then turned in unison to their captive enemy.

“You are terrible at keeping your team together,” Adagio muttered.

“This is just as much your fault as mine! Now, do you have any charm spells?” Starlight whispered.

“I can use enchantment spells, but I’m nowhere near as skilled as my little sister, and I personally find them distasteful.”

“You hypnotized a whole school!”

“Those were desperate times.”

“I know for a fact that you were smiling the entire time!”

“Those were also fun times.”

“Well, can you please have a little “fun” and enchant this man!?”

“No need.” The man said. His expression was solemn.

“What?” Starlight said.

“The boy put his neck on the line to help you, and then he did the same thing for me, takin’ that spell. That there was some genuine kindness, and that tells me that y’all ain’t all as bad as I’ve been told.”

“We are not the bad guys! You; you’re with the bad guys!” Starlight said.

“I beg to differ, but there ain’t no time. I’ll tell you what I can.”

“Who are you?” Starlight said.

“My name’s Burnt Oak. I used to sell Everfree firewood down on 7th street.”

Buck mumbled something to the effect of ‘I knew it!” against his gag.

“I meant what’s the name of your organization?”

“I can’t say.”

“Can’t, or won’t?” Adagio asked.

“Can’t.”

“So he’s enchanted.” Starlight said.

“Oh, what tipped you off?” Adagio said.

“Shut up. How are you alive?” Starlight asked.

“I’m not. I was dead until a coupl’a months ago.”

“How are you alive now?”

“I can’t say.”

“He’s being sustained by magic. Not unlike myself, but it’s flavor is absolutely revolting.”

“Is that what you meant when you said there’s not much time? Are you using up the last of the magic in your body?” Starlight said.

“That’s right. I’m on borrowed time.”

“Who are your allies?” Starlight said.

“I can’t say.”

“How many of you are there?” Adagio said.

“‘Bout a few.”

“Why are you targeting Canterlot?” Starlight said.

“For the mission. Canterlot’s filled with hopeless people with jacked-up feelings. A perfect place to look for candidates.”

“What is the mission?”

“To change the world through magic.”

“What does that mean?”

“I can’t say.”

“Where is your base?” Adagio asked.

“We’re kept in the dark about that. We just get told where to go, and we are teleported there and back.”

“You don’t teleport yourself?”

“No.”

“How does the person teleporting you know where and when to open portals?”

“He just knows. He knows what each of us’re doing.”

The man’s jaw seemed to slack, and his eyes grew droopy. The darkness of his skin grew sallow and pale.

“How?”

“Can’t say.”

“Who is he?”

“Our leader. He’s a real man of ideals. Gonna shake things up. I don’t know what he looks like.”

“...do you know what his aura looks like?” Starlight said.

“Orange. Waxy, kinda. Gives me the willies.” The man said. Adagio immediately wrote that down in her notebook.
The man seemed to age a few decades as they spoke. Hair was beginning to fall from his head, and his eyes glowed like dull orange embers.

“Why are you working for this man?” Adagio said.

“I got two lil’ sprouts. A daughter and a son. They need their daddy right now, but I can’t be around. What I can do is help them. See, we’ve had this little parcel of land nearby. Been in our family for generations, and now it’s at risk of bein’ bought out from under us, and not for the first damn time. Our leader promised me that the land would be protected. To get square, I told him about what’s waiting there, and he decided to bring me back to help with the plan.”

“You have to know that whatever your group is going to use that land for, it can’t be anything good!” Starlight said.

“Maybe. I can’t say.”

“So then why help?”

“As long as me and mine are alright, that’s good enough fer me. Somethin’ rough is comin’ fer this city, let me tell you, but if all you folks’re as good as that one over there, maybe y’all can shut it down, and my kids can keep their land besides.”
By now, Burnt Oak was little more than a mummified husk. He glowed with a haunting orange light and began to shake.

“He’s fading!” Starlight said.

“What’s waiting on that land!?” Adagio said.

“I c-can’t! Power! Power is waiting on the land! Heaps of power!”

“What are your children’s names!? Where is the land?” Starlight shouted.

“Get back, you idiot!” Adagio said, pulling Starlight away.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry for what I done! Forgive me master!” Burnt Oak howled as the embers in his eyes exploded into a column of horrid orange mana which disintegrated the man where he sat.

The pillar of mana screamed like a chorus of damned souls, and then, finally, there was silence.

Ditzy was so tired. She was tired of worrying about Buck, she was tired of working so hard at, well, work, and she still had to figure out what to do with Dinky once summer vacation rolled around.

She needed a bath and a massage and a good cuddle, but more than anything, she needed to get a grip.
Ditzy stood in front of her bathroom mirror, face streaked with tears, and tried to center herself.

“You’re losing your man, Ditzy! He loves you, he was under a truth spell, and he said it, so it’s true, right? So why is he…Adagio is nasty. Buck likes aggressive girls like that, and she must be messing with him when they have their gross little study dates. She’s getting her hooks in him again. You can’t let this happen. Your man is getting lost in a world that you know he doesn’t want to be a part of. You have to get him back!”

She was still reeling from what she had seen and done. She had fought a monster and won. She had flown to Buck’s side, and he was happy; excited even! He was excited to see her fight. He liked her being fierce.

He didn’t want to say it, but part of him liked everything going on.

She had to get him back before it was too late.

“Enough is enough, Buck. Are you in or out? I can’t have you messing with my plans and making me waste spells.” Starlight sneered. A few scant minutes had passed, and the spell loosening Buck’s lips had finally worn off. Adagio had spent the time quietly writing in her little pocket notebook with an intense look on her face, while Scootaloo had simply elevated her leg on a box.

“Are you seriously askin’ me this right now? After I got my ass kicked on your behalf and you made me blow a fuckin’ hole in my relationship with Ditzy?”

“Oh noooo, how terrible.” Adagio sighed.

“Shut up, Adagio!” Buck snarled. Adagio blew him a kiss, then continued writing.

“You’re the one that ‘almost kissed’ Adagio! I thought you were the loyal type!”

“He is. Trust me.” Adagio said, rolling her eyes.

“Shut up, Adagio!” Buck and Starlight said in unison.

“You need to stay away from her. I know it’s not ideal, but I could teach you instead!”

“Oh please, you have no idea how to teach this man. Your rote memorization will have him bored or furious by the end of a single session!”

“Starlight, I’m not a soldier. For fuck’s sake, my magic barely even worked in there! I could’ve been killed!”

“But you weren’t, because even though you don’t want to admit it, you have a knack for this. We saved lives today because you kept that cloak busy. You found a way to neutralize his powers, and you didn’t let yourself get kidnapped. Just think, Buck! Whatever these people have planned, it’s probably going to put the whole city in danger, and you can help us stop it! Don’t you want to make a difference for once instead of slinging baked goods and living on tips?”

“Well, when you say it like that…”

“Yes?”

“When you say it like that, you sound like a total asshole. You want me to risk my life, even knowing that Ditzy will do nothin’ but worry herself to death about it? Knowing that my powers are unstable? Why are you so damn desperate to get me out in the field!?”

Starlight Glimmer glanced at Adagio, who caught her with the corner of her eye as she took notes.

“Because you’re a powerhouse in the making!” Starlight said. “You may be unstable, and it may be dangerous, but at least I know I can trust you! At least, I thought I could.”

“Oh, fuck off! If this shit is so damn dire, why don’t you just get the Rainbooms to fix it!?”

Adagio looked up from her notebook. Starlight looked like she was caught in a bear trap, trying to decide if it was worth chewing off her leg to get away.

Suddenly, there was a ringing from Starlight's pocket. It was a little jingle version of the Harry Potter theme, cutting right through the tension in the warehouse.

“Bon Bon? Yes. We got some answers, but not nearly enough. The cloak is dead. No, not us. He died on his own. The body is gone. What? What do you mean? How is that even-okay, what happened? Are you serious? Okay, I’m on the way.” Starlight said, hanging up.

“What is it now?” Buck groaned.

“Our supplier was robbed while we were fighting. Bon Bon thinks what we went through today might have been a distraction.”

Starlight started heading for the door, but Buck followed along.

“Your supplier? Damn, I didn’t know you were cool like that. You smoke?”

“Our component supplier. Somatic components.”

“Where do you get those?”

“It’s a little shop on the west side. Cauldron Bubbles’ Sanctum of Sorcery.”

“Wait, for real? That’s Moon Dancer’s place! Hold up.” Buck reached for his phone, then frowned. Without needing to be asked, Adagio passed her phone to Buck. “Moonie? Hey, I know it’s been a lil’ while. Are you okay? Yeah, I heard. Yeah…the library? Sure. I’ll see you soon.”

“Who was that?” Starlight said.

“I know the tenant that lives above that shop. She’s gonna meet me at the library.” Buck said.

“Look at you, taking initiative.” Starlight said.

“This isn’t for you; this is for her.”

“If she knows anything useful, can you at least share it with me?” Starlight said.

“Fine. I guess you’re going to the crime scene?”

“No, the Pillars are on that. I’m taking Scootaloo back to Sunbursts’ suite to get healed. You can meet us there.”
Starlight didn’t wait for Scootaloo to catch up. She glanced at Buck and Adagio nervously before hobbling out of the warehouse.

“Adagio?” Buck sighed.

“Yes, Buck?”

“Let’s go. The library ain’t too far from here. “

“If you’re angry at me, you should just say it.” They were crossing the threshold of the Dusty Pages Memorial Library; a red brick building that Adagio was certain predated most of Canterlot. Buck had been brooding out of Adagio’s passenger side window while little red sparks fizzled around his head, and now he was visibly trying to relax.

“I’m angry at myself.” Buck said.

“Still blaming yourself for every little thing, Buck? What’s next, are you going to blame yourself for whatever happened to your friend’s shop?” Adagio said.

The library was extra quiet this late on a week day. Little more than teens studying for finals and the usual suspects milling about the shelves. This place always put Buck at ease, but the circumstances made it feel odd and almost alien.

“She’s not my friend. Not really…we’re on good terms, but it’s hard to explain.” Buck said.

“You can just call her a one-night stand. I won’t judge...very loudly." Adagio said.

"Hello, Buck. You look terrible."

Adagio shuddered as a cream-colored woman with unkempt red and purple hair came up behind her. She had a chubby, curvaceous form, thick eyebrows, and even thicker glasses.

"Good to see you, Moon Dancer. You've gained weight." Buck said.

Adagio looked shocked at Buck, but saw that this Moon Dancer had a small smile on her face.

"And?" Moon Dancer said.

"And you're wearing it extremely well." Buck said.

"Thank you for noticing. Is this the Adagio I've heard about?"

"This is she."

"Adagio Dazzle. An absolute pleasure." Adagio said, with a bit of a flourish.

"So I’ve heard. Are you two still an item?"

"No." Buck said. Again, Adagio rankled.

"And what are you to him? Another suitor?" Adagio said.

For a moment, Adagio thought that a bit of Buck's horniness had flared up, but an extremely similar emotion was radiating off this woman in gentle waves. If Buck’s passion was like a spicy-sweet inferno, this Moon Dancer’s was like a flowing river of red wine. To say she felt threatened was an understatement, and yet, she tasted no ill will.

"Woah, uh, well, it's uh…" Buck started.

"I'm his apprentice, actually. It's not complicated." Moon Dancer said.

“Well, I wouldn’t go sayin’ it like that,” Buck said.

“I’ve studied under you, and you’ve been quietly supporting me since then, even if that support is often just gentle advice and encouragement. Your guidance lead me to a craft and lifestyle that's become a passion. I’ve even studied your work to try and figure out your techniques. I’m your apprentice.”

“I don’t really think that-”

“Don’t think what? That your lessons had an impact on me? I know my Lord is bashful, but you don’t have to downplay your role in my success.”

“And what lessons were those, Buck?” Adagio said, with the ringing tone of a sharpened axe.

“Haha, we’re gettin’ off track! Do you wanna talk out here, or in a booth where we can have some privacy?” Buck said.

“A booth, definitely.” Moon Dancer said.

“I’ll go to the front desk and reserve our usual, then.” Buck said. He stepped away briskly, leaving Adagio and Moon Dancer to stand around awkwardly.

“He's covered in bruises. Did you do that?" Moon Dancer said, finally.

Despite her placid expression, Adagio felt an air of coiled menace radiate off her.

"No, he did that to himself. He got in a fight." Adagio said.

"Was it for someone else?"

"Of course. Why are you smiling?"

"He’s always seemed the type."

“Indeed.” Adagio said.

“Hm.” Moon Dancer said.

"So."

"Hm?"

“‘My Lord?’ Does he make you call him that?”

“No, no, I do that on my own. But he loves it.”

“Does he, now?”

“He absolutely does. You should call him that all the time.” The smug grin that Adagio saw seemed almost alien on the chubby, slightly disheveled face.

“Oh, you are just a treat.” Adagio smirked.

Buck looked back and quirked his head. The trio squeezed into the little study room, which had never seemed cramped before today.

"Alright, what happened?" Buck said.

"I came home to find the front window shattered and a whole shipment of quartz missing." Moon Dancer said.

"What about Cauldron Bubbles?"

"Also missing. This is the strangest thing that’s happened to me this year, so I assumed you might be involved."

“Not by choice, Moonie.”

"Was there any green slime on the premises?" Adagio asked.

"...actually yes. I definitely saw some sort of snot on the ground."

"Changelings. Your manager has been taken by changelings." Adagio said. "Finally, some good news."

"The hell are you talkin’ about?" Buck said.

"If it's changelings, I can track them. I've gotten used to their horrible taste and scent. I have reason to believe this isn't our cloaked friends, but an act of desperation by the queen."

"What makes you say that?"

"Context clues, mostly. You said that your crystals were stolen, yes?"

"Yes."

"Wonderful. That's all we need to know." Adagio said, rising to her feet.

"And? Are you going to return my landlady?"

"I'll make sure that's a priority going forward."

"That sounds suspiciously like you don't care. Buck?"

"Yeah, Moonie?"

"It looks like you're all wrapped up in this business. Can I trust you to save Cauldron Bubbles?"

"I'm not really…I'm not, like a part of the team or anything, I'm just sort of adjacent to the whole thing."

"I understand. Then I'll just have to rely on this one. Please do everything you can." Moon Dancer said, looking at Adagio.

"If you’re under the impression that I’m some fairytale hero, you’re mistaken. I do, however, happen to know a few people who would very much like to fit that bill, and I will relay your request to them.”

“Is that a yes?” Moon Dancer said.

“That’s a ‘I’ll pass it on’, I think.” Buck said.

“Yes,” Adagio said, opening her phone.

“Adagio does this thing where if you ask her to be nice or do a good thing, she starts acting like an ancient fey tryin’ to cut you a raw deal." Buck said. “Ah yes, my dear, I’ll venmo you ten bucks, but in exchange, I’ll take three of your toes!”

“Sounds like a delight.” Moon Dancer said.

“Excuse me?” Adagio said over her shoulder.

“Nothing is ever easy with her. Not even once.”

“Sounds familiar. No wonder you two are such birds of a feather.”

“Or maybe I just attract strange women.” Buck laughed.

“I’m right here. Why are you gossiping as if I left the room?”

“Oh, damn, sorry. My brain starts gettin’ all “Austen Sassy” when I hang out with Moonie.”

“Honestly, between her and Scootaloo, you keep the strangest concubines, Buck.” Adagio said.

“Who?” Moon Dancer said.

“Oh, you’d love her. She makes the most precious noises when you-”

“Okay, we’re leaving! I need to get some ice on my face. Moon Dancer, I really would like to come by and gossip some more once all this crazy shit blows over.” Buck said.

“So much for a quiet life, Buck.” Moon Dancer said.

“Yeah. I’ll tell you about it later.”

“You know where to find me, My Lord.”

“You don’t have to keep callin’ me that.”

“I’ll stop once you stop blushing, My Lord.”

Buck and Adagio made their way toward the exit. Adagio was beginning to look self-satisfied in a way that left Buck uneasy.

“What’s that smile about?” Buck said.

“Oh, nothing. Just connecting some dots.”

“You want to share with the rest of the class?”

“Haven’t we established that you don’t want to take part in this endeavor?” Adagio said, nose in the air as the two descended some stairs.

“Yeah. Today was an accident.”

“Then we don’t need to discuss it.”

“But we do need to talk.”

“Yes, but later. Now, come along. I’m tired of looking at you when you’re so battered.”

“Aw! Were you worried about me while I was fighting that zombie?” Buck said, circling ahead of Adagio, trying to catch her eye.

“I was totally confident that you would take care of it!” Adagio looked away, smiling.

“So you weren’t worried that I would get super murdered in there? Not even a lil’ bit?”

“No. I simply trusted you to handle the situation, even without me. And what do you know?”

“Don’t you start. I’ve heard enough of this from Glimglam.”

“I’m simply giving you credit. Isn’t that what you want?”

“I want you to stop trying to pull on my strings-” Buck began.

“Buck?” Whispered a raspy voice.

Adagio and Buck looked over to see Smolder at a wide, angled table. On it was a map that looked old and worn, but only by a few decades.

“Smolder? What’re you doin’ here?”

“Shh!” It was Moon Dancer, who was already pushing a book cart away.

“Sorry. What are you doing here? I thought you’d be back in the Bay by now?” Buck said in a hushed tone.

“I’m doing my job! What are you doing here with the witch of the well?” Smolder said.

“Rude.” Buck said.

“Not the worst I’ve heard," Adagio said. "What is this map you have?”

“None of your business,” Smolder said.

“It doesn’t matter. We were just leaving.” Adagio said, tapping her phone. “Buck, Sunburst says he’s got healing crystals, an ice pack, and a juice box waiting for you at his suite.”

“Tell him I love him and that he’s an absolute legend.” Buck said.

“She’s in with Sunburst?” Smolder said.

“She’s with the good guys. For now. I guess.” Buck said.

“Well, if Sunburst vouches for you, I guess we’re on the same team,” Smolder said, looking around conspiratorily.

“Okay, lean in close,” Smolder said.

Buck and Adagio huddled with Smolder as she indicated the map.

“The Pillars helped me deal with the dragon situation, and they're paying me to help with their investigation,” Smolder said.

“Oh good, another brute, as if Starlight wasn’t enough. Let me guess; they plan to unleash you as a dragon against our shared enemy.” Adagio said.

“I’m a cartographer, you stuck-up bitch. I can't control myself when I go all scaly, so they asked me to research the caves in the Everfree Mountain Range not far from town.

“What for?” Buck said.

“Changelings. Whatever surveillance the Pillars have in this region, the changelings must be moving through the forest without their knowing. That must be how they keep infiltrating the city. The only way they could do that is if they were using tunnels of some sort.” Adagio said.

“I thought these guys could teleport?”

“Creating portals is mana intensive. They can’t afford to just send grunts into the city willy-nilly with magic. Simple guerilla tactics are far more cost-effective.” Adagio said.

“Right. There’s a large cave system in the region that’s off-limits to the public. The Pillars think that the changelings are using them to get close enough to town that they can sneak in. But, these tunnels are super maze-like, and there aren’t a lot of official maps of them.”

Adagio’s eyes followed Smolder's finger as she gestured over the map. The caves on display snaked in a dizzying amount of directions. On the edges of the map were illustrated signposts indicating nearby landmarks. To the south was Canterlot City, to the west was someplace called the Snowdrop Inn, and to the north was Camp Everfree. Adagio didn’t recognize those last two.

“Yeesh. What a mess.” Buck said.

“Exactly. So I’m here collecting data so that when the Pillars send their people in, they won’t get lost.”

“In theory,” Adagio said.

“Yeah. I was just about to pack up, honestly. I think these caves go way farther into the range than the maps say, and I’ve about run the well dry in this place.” Smolder said.

“Interesting.” Adagio took a quick snapshot with her phone.

“Hey! These maps are old! You can’t just-”

“That will be all, thank you. You’ve been a marvelous help.” Adagio said. “Shall we, Buck?”

“Buck, why are you still wrapped up with this one? And why do you look like crap?”

“Magic, Smolder. It’s always fuckin’ magic. Once a little bit of magic enters the picture, everything just starts snowballing.”

“Well, I’d say take care of yourself, but I know you better than that.”

“Heh.”

“How about you do your best, and I’ll do mine?”

“Same as it ever was.” Adagio saw a bitter smile mirrored between the two. Whatever history they shared, she reasoned it was more than a bit morose, but intimate. She turned her envious eyes away and headed for the door.

Sunburst was working carefully, his hands glowing a soft yellow as they straightened Scootaloo’s leg.

“I just don’t get it,” Scootaloo said. She was staring at the ceiling.

“What don’t you get?”

“Buck and Adagio, and Ditzy. Buck and Ditzy are like super cute together. They look, I dunno...old. Like they’ve been together for a million years. But Buck and Adagio always look like they’re on their honeymoon and having a fight about dinner.”

“Hah, that’s a good way to put it!” Sunburst said. “I thought you’d be more upset about your leg. Weren’t you going for regionals?”

“Who cares? Who cares about regionals?”

“Don’t you?” Starlight said, looking up from her notes.

“I blew my chance at regionals by chasing Wind Sprint…”

“I’m sorry, Scoots,” Sunburst said.

“No, no, it’s okay. I’ve been thinking about it, and maybe it was a good thing. I wasn’t really sprinting because I wanted to, and if I’m being honest, I was getting pretty depressed.”

“Do you want to talk about it? It's okay to talk about your feelings, Scoots.”

“Don't get all sappy! I want to help you guys with this fight. That’s what I want to do. If these freaks are gonna mess with innocent people like Wind Sprint, I wanna go mess with them! Mess up their faces! Yeah!”

“Sorry Scoots, but the only thing messed up right now is your ankle.” Sunburst said.

“Huh?

“It’s a sprain; a minor tear of the ligament, but even after healing, it’ll take some time before you can get moving again. I’d give it a week or two, maybe.”

“But, but, what am I supposed to do if I can’t run around!? How am I going to help?”

“You can help by resting and getting well. You did good today, Scootaloo. Better than anyone could have expected.” Starlight said.

“Uh, thanks…?” Scoots said. Sunburst frowned.

“I mean, uh, you really showed some initiative saving that girl, and you handled things before anyone got really hurt. You may be new to this, but you’re a natural.” Starlight said.

“Oh, well, I never would’ve gotten up there if it wasn’t for Buck and Adagio…”

“Right. What exactly did Buck do? It was mana transference, definitely, but what did he say to you?”

“He just gave me a sorta pep talk! He said I could do it, basically and he said my butt is cute and then I was off, like whoosh!”

“Buck delivered a speech, and then you got a windfall of mana,” Starlight said.

“Pretty much.”

“Sunburst? Any thoughts?”

“Plenty. Normally mana transference is simple; It’s just a small boost of mana. But what Scootaloo described was different. She underwent an awakening. A person speaks passionately about something they have an emotional attachment to, followed by a big surge of magic in an individual they’re close with. Now, this could be a byproduct of Buck’s large pool of mana, but doesn’t that sequence of events sound familiar?”

“It sounds like Twilight Sparkle. And Sunset Shimmer.” Starlight said.

“And Adagio was the one that prompted him. Do you remember how she drew on our magic in the changeling nest? When we jumped out the window?”

“Yeah!” Scoots said.

“That was the Power of Friendship. She was able to pull on it, just for a second.”

“That’s impossible. Adagio Dazzle doesn’t understand ‘friendship’.” Starlight said.

“Hey, come on, that’s not true! Adagio was our friend for a buncha weeks! We got drunk and watched cartoons and stuff!”

“She was just pretending to get close to you so she could worm her way back into Buck’s good graces. Just like she’s trying to do now.” Starlight said.

“Well, my point is, if Adagio was able to use the power of friendship, even second-hand, due to her mana-draining abilities, and Buck is able to induce awakening like the Princess of Friendship, we might be sitting on our ace in the hole.”

“...you might be right, Sunburst. I hate it, but you might be right!”

“Wait, what’s bad about that?” Scootaloo said.

“We’re fighting against opponents that can come back from the dead. We don’t know where they’re based, we’re outnumbered, and they’re in league with the queen of the changelings. Buck could be what turns the tide in our favor…but he doesn’t want to be a part of this fight, and I don’t blame him.” Sunburst said.

“That, and if Adagio is acting as a catalyst for this power, it means we have to keep both her and Buck close,” Starlight said. “That witch must have been planning this from the start. The moment she realized there was a looming threat, she had an in.”

“Oh…that’s bad,” Scootaloo said. “Ditzy’s not gonna like that one bit.”

“If we’re going to have any chance at saving Canterlot for whatever these creeps have planned, we need to keep Buck and Adagio together. I don’t like it at all, but its better than letting Adagio run loose on her own.” Starlight said.

“But what about Ditzy!? She hates this stuff!” Scootaloo said.

Sunburst was about to interject, but Starlight cut him off with a sigh.

“I’ll talk to her. In the meantime, we can’t let Buck and Adagio get too close…but we can’t let them stay apart, either.”

“What’s the matter, now?” Adagio said.

They had been driving for a few minutes. The north side’s skyscrapers were rising into view, flashing the burning glare of the setting sun into Buck’s eyes.

“What?” Buck said.

“You’re pouting. I can taste you pouting.”

“I’m obviously having a shitty day, Adagio. I almost got myself killed, Ditzy is pissed at me, and you…!”

“What about me?”

“You’re pissed at me too, aren’t you?”

“No, I’m frustrated.”

“Well, that makes two of us. But you don’t really care what I think, do you?”

“Of course I care, Buck.”

“Why did you have to blow my ass out like that? Why are you trying to fuck with me and Ditzy? I thought you respected what we have.”

“I never said that, Buck. I said I would give you some much-needed space, and I’ve kept that promise!”

“You call what happened on Tuesday keeping your promise?”

“I was setting boundaries.”

“You were breaking my boundaries.”

“I was trying to hammer into your head that you need to be emotionally honest to master your magic. The conversation happened to wander, as our little talks tend to. You’re the one that embraced me.”

"Well, I feel pretty shitty about that, too. I’m a grown-ass adult in a committed relationship, and I shouldn’t allow things to escalate like that."

“So it’s shame, then. She has you believing that it's shameful to embrace your feelings, even if those feelings go against the grain.”

“Just because I’m a horny idiot, that doesn’t mean I have to act like one. I have an honest, normal relationship with someone, for once, and I don’t need you to come in and try to yank me away from it.”

"It's not my fault that things aren't working out with your painfully vanilla housewife and her ugly child." Adagio hissed.

"Don’t insult them! You can talk shit about me all you want, but you don’t get to make fun of them!” Buck barked.

Adagio glanced at him, a bit shocked, and saw that he was serious.

“Sorry. I wasn’t trying to get heated.” Buck said.

“And that’s the problem, Buck! If your mana is powered by passion, you can’t keep running away from your feelings. Especially not your feelings for me.”

“Oh, my god. This was such a trap. You’re teaching me to cast with this emotion so you can groom me.”

“I am teaching you to cast with passion, because passion is your strongest emotion.”

“And it’s just a coincidence that you’ve put me in a space where I have to feel ‘passion’ in a room with you, alone, every single week, while I’m in a relationship with another woman.”

“Well, when you say it like that, it makes me sound like a duplicitous, opportunistic monster,” Adagio smirked.

“I was gonna say that’s a really convoluted way to make me hold your hand.”

“Oh, fuck you, Buck.”

“Like, holy shit, do you ever do anything normal, Adagio? Can we not keep doing this thing where you have to turn everything into a game of 3D chess?”

“I am as I am, Buck.”

“So if I hang around you, are you going to just keep screwing with me and Ditzy?”

“Is that what you think I’m doing? You think I'm involved with you just to spite your little affair?”

“Don’t gaslight me, Adagio.”

“I said what I said because I care about your well-being. It's of no concern to me who you choose to lay with. You should be honored; caring for humans is an act of will for me.”

“You only care about me because I keep you fed.” For a moment, Buck tasted like bitter bile. Accusations bubbled up in his throat, but he choked them down.

“You know that’s not true.”

“So what are you after? Who’s side are you on?”

“I’m on my side, but I need you, and you need me. Everything I’ve done since you decided to start talking to me again, I’ve done with the secondary goal of helping you.”

“Secondary to what?”

“Secondary to my own ambitions.”

“Which you aren’t going to tell me.”

“No. Frankly, I don’t think you actually care about that. You want to know what I want from you.”

“You’re being surprisingly upfront. It’s not like you.”

“When I said to treat me as a colleague, I meant it.”

“So I can trust you to tell it to me straight?”

“That’s right.”

Adagio’s fancy sports car snapped up a little parking spot on the side of the road.

“Okay, Adagio. Say your piece.”

“Buck, you are the most frustrating person I've ever tried to court."

"Well, the feeling's mutual."

“All I’m trying to do is give you a space where you are free to explore the person you are, whoever that person is. I’ve taken a liking to you, and I’m curious to see your potential unleashed.”

“Okay, so I am just a project to you.”

“No, I respect you too much for that. If you don’t want to develop your magic any further, you are well within your rights to do so. If that’s how you feel, we can stop our study sessions. However, I still enjoy spending time with you, even if that time is unproductive.”

“Well, if you promise not to screw with me and Ditzy’s relationship, then we can hang.”

Anxious silence flooded into the space between the two.

“...I don’t think she’s right for you. And before you start screaming at me about loyalty and monogamy; I’m not trying to poison your relationship. But I also refuse to watch you suffer and starve yourself.“

“I don’t know what you mean by that.”

“Oh, yes you do. You’re very well acquainted with starvation, aren’t you Buck?”

“Well, yeah. I’m poor.”

“I don’t mean physically. I mean, you are starved for validation. You want to be cared for so acutely, but you despise yourself for it. And you are filled with shame. Why is that, Buck?”

“No, I’m not filled with fucking shame, Adagio.”

“Oh, yes you are. You are ashamed when I buy something for you. You are ashamed when you step into a kitchen. You are ashamed when you babble about your interests. You are especially ashamed of how well you pampered me in the bedroom.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Haven’t we been over this? I can taste your emotions, and I’ve had months to sample and get accustomed to your flavors. So when I say how you feel, know that it is the truth. I don’t flatter you and I don’t embellish you. You’re too important for that.”

“So what are you trying to say, then? So I want validation; so does everybody!”

“You want for it like a starving man wants for a meal, and at the same time, you’re terrified of taking space in other people’s lives. You suffer alone, because you don’t want to be a bother. Who did this to you? Who deprived you of the attention you need? Was it your parents? A previous partner? Your friends?”

“You’re fishing.”

“And now you’ve found someone damaged. Someone pitiable who you can sacrifice yourself for. So you’re going to hollow yourself out and remove all of your sharp edges in order to be a cuddly, inoffensive plush doll.”

"You’re over the line, Adagio.”

“I understand what you need. Better than anyone, and still you choose to attach yourself to a little girl who will stuff you in a toybox the moment she realizes that you can’t be tamed. But I want to see you evolve, Buck. I want to see the person you are when you aren’t being constrained by petty things like money and shame!”

“You’re just trying to seduce me, again, and I’m not letting you manipulate me.”

“I’ve already seduced you, Buck. Why would I manipulate you? We’re just having a conversation.”

“Because, and don’t take this the wrong way, I think you have a hard time turning it off. You approach everything in this mean-spirited, machiavellian way, and it’s fucking exhausting. Even now, you’re trying to talk me into a corner. Even though that’s not who you are. Not really.”

“And what would your little human brain know about the machinations of an immortal beast?”

“I know that the real reason you’re helping me is not because I’m part of your master plan. I think it’s a lot simpler than that.”

“Excuse me?”

“I think you’re just coming up with excuses to keep me around.”

Buck watched Adagio strangle a look of shock before it could spread across her face.

“I’m not stupid. Why do you and Starlight think I’m fucking stupid? Do you really think I would get close to you again, after you admitted you were using me, without at least thinking about it? Come the fuck on, Adagio.”

“What’s your point, Buck?”

“My point is, I’m not going to let you dress me down without giving some back. Since lying to me didn’t work, and invading my date didn’t work, you jumped at the first chance you had to get back in my orbit; teaching me magic. That way you could conveniently leech off my mana with my consent, and by teaching me to defend myself, you would make it harder for any rivals to get at me.”

“And?”

“And that was real dastardly and all, but it wasn’t enough to ‘win me over'. Because what me and Ditzy have is different, and even though you’ve fit me all snuggly into your plans, you can’t keep me. All Ditzy ever did was love me, and that was enough. And I know that pisses you off, but since you’re Adagio-fucking-Dazzle, you can’t just admit it.”

“You’re projecting. You’re the one that’s always holding back.”

“You say that you don’t know who I am, but you’ve always known how I felt. Always.”

“So you’re going to settle for a human because she makes it easy for you.” Adagio’s tone had grown frigid.

“I'm a human too, Adagio.”

“So you keep reminding me.”

“So maybe I’m not getting what I want right now. Ditzy is trying her best to fit me into her life and make us both happy. I could never get that kind of care from you.”

Buck saw Adagio cringe violently in her seat like she was struggling against the urge to strangle him.

“I dove into your hobbies. I ingratiated myself with your friends. I fought to protect you and yours! How is that not ‘care’ to you!?” Adagio snarled.

“Are you tellin’ me that your love language is evil scheming?”

“Don’t change the subject! I have moved mountains for you! I let you stick your dick in me whenever you wanted; an offer which you were too scared to fully exploit!”

“I didn’t want our whole relationship to be about sex!”

“Well, maybe it should have been!” Adagio screamed.

Buck paused, mouth wide, caught mid-diatribe.

“Uh…what?”

Adagio sat back in her driver’s seat, staring up at the ceiling.

“Why are you so timid about sex, Buck? You’re incredible at it! Why are you ashamed of that!?”

“If you knew about what I’ve done, you’d be ashamed to be with me!”

“Oh, please, I’ve seen you on video! You should get paid for that!”

“I do!”

“...come again?”

“I have been paid for it, Adagio! I’m a fucking gigolo! I didn’t want to tell you because you'd start looking down on me! They always fucking do!”

“You’re…you’ve been a courtesan?”

“A tramp! Sometimes…sometimes this world just isn’t fair, and sometimes you have to do shit that you’re not proud of, and then it follows you wherever you go! I’m sure you can fucking relate!”

Silence sat heavy in the car while a lightning storm raged over the sea of Adagio’s mind.

It made sense.

The way he cleaned up for a date, his focus on pleasuring his partner, his endurance, his ability to swing between moods like masks, and his fear of being discarded after sex. His hang-ups about ‘Her’, whoever that was.

Did she reject him due to sex? Punish him for it?

Clients. He said his ‘clients’ were usually older women.

Chrysalis must have approached him as Harshwhinny to be a ‘client’. She hadn't charmed him; he had been paid. It was a performance. Adagio had been sleeping with a professional whore.

“I didn’t know, Buck. How could I have known?”

Buck looked over to see genuine sadness on Adagio's face.

“Don’t. Don’t you start pitying me.”

“Is that why you’re so afraid of being used? Is that why you keep letting yourself be used, regardless?”

Adagio’s mind slowed as her hand reached out to touch Buck’s cheek. She had shifted from pouty to angry to aroused and then to sorrowful in one argument, and she couldn’t tell if it was Buck’s aura affecting her or if she was simply in too deep to tell the difference between her emotions and his.

All she knew was that she tasted an unfolding tragedy in Buck, and in that precious moment, in spite of her plans, her prejudice, and conventional wisdom, all she wanted to do was save him from it.

“You’ve been serving people for so long, Buck. You’ve been shamed and scarred for it, haven’t you?”

“Don’t you look down on me, Adagio.” Buck stared back at Adagio, defiance in his eyes.

“And you’re scared of devoting yourself to someone because you’re afraid they’ll spit you onto the ground like cheap gum. Used up.”

“If I didn’t have my magic, that’s exactly what you’d do.”

“If you didn’t have your magic, you would still have a place in my bed. In what way is it fair to repress such a marvelous skill? I would never dream of shaming you for it. Not like her."

Adagio's eyes flashed pink for just a moment. Her hands were gentle as they traced Buck's stubble. She saw his eyes shimmer with tears.

“She’s doing her best.”

“Doing her best to ignore one of your finest features. But I would never ask you to hide, Buck. I want to see that thirsty little fiend that you keep locked up.”

“You don’t mean that. You're just trying to get one over on Ditzy.” He was fighting a smile.

“I bet you spoil her, like you always spoiled me. How long has it been since someone spoiled you, Buck?” His name was ambrosia on her tongue.

"You're just saying what I want to hear."

“Can you trust me enough to let me finish? Haven’t I earned the right to be heard out?”

“...fine. But you need to know that this is the last time I’m even going to entertain this.” Buck brushed Adagio’s hands away from his face, sitting back in his seat, crossing his arms.

“Do you remember our first night? You were such a gentleman...at first.”

“I remember.”

“I was trying to swallow you whole, Buck. But you were such a mouthful, it was overwhelming. You fit me just right, and I came harder than I had in generations spent in this miserable world. And then you decided that wasn’t enough.”

“Adagio, please.”

“So you flipped me over and you took me, Buck. You fucked me like you were trying to get me pregnant. I couldn’t be bothered to count how many times I climaxed just from your relentless, vicious pounding. And then you came, and it put the fear of all the gods in me. Because I knew I had found a feast that wouldn’t just satisfy me, but overflow me. It was simple, and shallow, but it was a bliss that I won’t ever forget, and I know you won’t either. Don’t you wish you could just toss away all the pretense, all the trauma, all of the pointless, wasteful shame and just do as you please?”

Buck turned away, but Adagio purred in his ear.

“Don’t you miss being with someone that wants you as much as you want them?”

The door clicked. Buck was on his feet, halfway out of the car. Adagio held his hand.

“That’s enough.”

Buck yanked his hand away. His shame had won.

He turned to walk away from Adagio. He wouldn’t even look at her, now. A part of her was glad for that, even as she rose from her seat to call for him, following his steps until she was just behind him.

“Are you just going to keep running away from me!?”

“It’s called being faithful!”

“To whom? Certainly not to yourself!”

“Stop playing games, Adagio!”

“I will, once you stop hiding from this!”

“From what!?”

“The person I know you want to be!”

“Do you know what I really want, Adagio?”

“Name it.”

And then Buck turned. Pink flames were flickering at the edges of his form. Adagio felt the urge to swim away and hide under a rock, but Buck’s terrible golden eyes had caught her again.

“Do you remember the aquarium?” Buck said.

“How could I forget? The way you listened to me, the way you spoke to me, the way you fucked me, it was-”

“No.” The pink flames were in his eyes. A furnace igniting. A dragon roaring. It shook Adagio with its fury.

Buck stepped forward, and suddenly Adagio had run out of room. He was looming over her, a sun setting over the sea, and her back was against the wall. She wanted to give him the world. She wanted to take the world, with him. She wanted to run away with him.

“Not the boardwalk; the aquarium. Do you remember what I said to you before the fight?”

She’d never forget the blue glow of the water dancing across his face. The fullness of his lips. The heat of his breath against hers.

It was a simple message, one he had spent all day trying to deliver. In some ways, he had been trying to say it since they sat on that bench together across from his work. Adagio had denied it, over and over again, but he had said it to her in every tender embrace, every sweet nothing spoken in her ear, and every tiny gesture.

He had been so patient with her.

Now Adagio’s eyes tried to slip away.

“What did I say to you, Adagio?”

“Stop it...”

She knew what he wanted. She had braved a burning building today, but this heat was more than she could take.

“What did I say?”

“Let me love you.” Adagio muttered.

“She loves me, Adagio. Despite everything, Ditzy Doo loves me. Can you say the same?”

“You’re not playing fair, Buck.”

“This isn’t a game! I can’t sense your feelings, but you’ve known mine the whole time. Better than me, even. Did you ever feel the same? Even once?”

“I…well, our romance was, it was very whirlwind and chaotic, and I don’t think you can simplify it in such a-” Adagio mumbled.

“There’s no one here to judge us. It’s just you and me. You want me to stop pretending? You go first.”

He cupped her chin in that incredibly gentle way he always did. Adagio’s schemes dried up on her tongue.

“I don’t…I…well, humans are, uhm…”

“You said that you’ve never lied to me. I want to believe you. Say it to me. Just this once.”

The honest, chain-bound voice in Adagio’s heart screamed in its distant dungeon. Adagio could barely hear it over her own frantic heartbeat.

Buck waited. He was so close to kissing her, begging her to give up the charade, to let her own mask fall, to be honest, finally.

Adagio’s eyes sank down to the ground with the setting sun.

The heat of Buck’s forge died as he stepped away.

“Buck?”

“Goodnight, Adagio.”

By the time Buck made it home, the adrenaline had worn off. He was back to hurting everywhere. He got cleaned up, then stood in the shower, staring at the drain until the water got cold. After that, he sat on the couch for twenty minutes or maybe a year, trying to prepare himself for a second shouting match.

He checked his mirror to make sure he didn’t have any fancies flying around his head. He regretted that decision as he saw the shiner that Burnt Oak had left on him. Wouldn’t be able to explain that at work. He’d have to call Sunburst to patch him up in the morning. He didn’t dare try to go over there with Adagio possibly waiting for him.

Once he unclenched his jaw and his fists, he headed next door.

It was quiet.

Not even the TV was on; all Buck heard was the sound of crickets coming from the copse of trees behind the apartments and Dinky chattering softly from the bedroom.

Buck shut the door, and Ditzy poked her head out of the bedroom.

“Oh! Welcome home, Buck.”

Despite everything, Ditzy managed to meet his eyes with one of hers.

“Hey, Muffin,” Buck said, bracing himself.

“Buck, I know today was…a lot, but would you mind doing Dinky’s hair for me? You’re better at it.”

“Huh? Yeah, of course.”

“Great! I’ll go ahead and heat something up for you. I bet you’re starving right now!”
Buck felt pretty hollow in his stomach and his chest. It hadn’t occurred to him that he hadn’t eaten since this morning.

“Uh, yeah!”

“And I’ll get some ice for your face, ‘kay? Your necklace is on the coffee table.”
Buck nodded and headed into the bedroom. Dinky was sitting on a stool in front of the bathroom mirror, a brush stuck in her wavy mop of hair.

“Hiya, Buck!”

“Hey, Dink. You ready for bed?”

“Not yet! My hair’s being dumb!”

“Lemme see here…you’ve got knots, that’s all. Your hair is naturally wavy, so it kinks up more easily than your Mom’s. Pass me that comb?”

“Uh-huh!”

“You see what I’m doin’ here? You wanna comb downwards, like this. You don’t wanna hit your kinda texture with a brush, because it’ll make it tangle.”

“Okay, Buck!”

Dinky chatted with Buck as he automatically went through the process of tidying up her hair. It was about the only time in the day when she could sit still.

“Buck?”

“Dink?”

“How come you look all beat up?”

“Ah, I got into a game of tag that got a little too rough. Did you have fun at Uncle Sunbursts’ place?”

“Yeah! We read stories and did some drawings and had juice!”

“Good stuff, good stuff! Did you learn anything?”

“Hmm…wizards are funny, but Diamond Dogs are funnier, and they like to sing!”

“Oh yeah? Has Uncle Sunburst been reading you Tolkien again?”

“Yuh-huh! Hey, how come Tom Bombadil has horns and stuff?”

“He’s a draconequus, Dink.”

“What’s a drakwon…dark…con…?”

“Draconequus. It’s like a…like a magical thingy made of a bunch of animal parts. They make chaos, and they’re funny, and sometimes they’re dangerous. Sometimes they have the power to solve all the problems in a story, but then they just don’t. Magical thingies are like that, sometimes.”

Buck was now carrying Dinky to bed in her pj's. It was the same Skeletor shirt she wore to bed every night, which always managed to get a little chuckle out of Buck.

“Buck?”

“Yeah, Dink.”

“Are you a papa?”

“Hah, no. I don’t have any kids.”

“But don’t old people have kids?”

“Hey now, I’m not that old!”

“You’re like a buh-million years old!”

“I’m 28, Dink. Do you know how old that is?”

“It’s closer to buh-million than 7!”

Buck heard Ditzy laugh in the living room. He shook his head and tucked Dinky in, a smile stuck on his face with glue.

“You know what? That’s fair.”

“I think you would be a good papa, Buck! You laugh a bunch, and you give good hugs, and you like to sit down, like the papas on TV!”

“That’s a really sweet thing to say, Dink. Are you good?”

Dinky nodded and yawned.

“Okay. Goodnight, Dinky Doo.” Buck turned away but stopped short.

“Buck, I love you!” Dinky said it like she was reminding him to grab his keys.

“Love ya, Dink.” Buck leaned down to hug the little girl, who squeezed him like she thought he would float away. “I’ll see you in the morning.” When Buck pulled away, Dinky was already out.

Buck returned to the living room and sat heavily on the couch. He heard Ditzy humming softly as she stirred a little pot on the stove.

“Did you hear that?” Buck tried.

“Mhm. You really are good with her, Buck. She doesn’t have a lot of guy figures in her life, so I’m glad she’s so attached to you.”

“Really? I know her Dad’s not around, but what about family?”

“You and me…we’re pretty much the only family she’s got. I’m kind of a black sheep.”

“Oh. You know, you don’t have to cook. I don’t think I have much of an appetite after today.”

“No you don’t, mister man. I’m not going to let you go to bed hungry. Besides, it’s no trouble; it’s just some ravioli I made for dinner.”

Ditzy placed a colorful little bowl filled with red sauce and pasta on the coffee table. It was definitely one of Dinky’s, but dinnerware was expensive, so it paid to reuse it.

Somehow, Ditzy was able to make canned ravioli taste like a legit gourmet meal.

“Can you take your shirt off?” Ditzy said.

“What?” Buck said.

“So I can take care of all your knicks and bangs. You got seriously knocked around today.” Ditzy said, setting down a little first aid kit she kept in the cabinet.

“Uh, sure, yeah.”

There was a shuffling of cloth and a little gasp from Ditzy.

“Jeez, Buck. Maybe you should call in sick on Monday.”

“I’m fine.”

“No, you’re all beat up! You’re covered in bruises, and-and scrapes!”

“Well damn, Ditzy. Who’s gonna cover me if I just disappear on Monday? Can’t be Scoots, with that leg, and you’re already workin’.”

“The Cakes could figure something out…there’s gotta be temps, or somethin’. You need to rest, anyway.”

“I can rest when I’m dead.”

“Well, I don’t want that to be this week, so you better start now,” Ditzy said, passing Buck a cloth full of ice. “Here. For your eye.”

Buck sat facing Ditzy, watching as she meticulously treated his scrapes and cleaned off his bruises.

“You look like you did when you first came here.”

“Huh?”

“When you moved in. You were all messed up then, too.”

“Oh, yeah. It took me a long time to get back to myself.”

“I know the feeling,” Ditzy said.

“I’m just glad my big sis was here to catch my dumbass when I fell. Man…if she knew I was getting in fights, she’d throw me out the window.”

“Huh-what? Sissy wouldn’t do that! She’s like the sweetest woman in the whole world!”

“Wasn’t always. Took a long road to get to “Saint Sissy.” She was a fun-sized mcfuckin’ nightmare when we were kids. Y'ever wonder why I get so quiet? It’s 'cause she did enough yellin’ for the both of us.”

“Really? She always seems so reserved, uh, you know, when she’s not arguing or anything.”

“Uh-huh. Temper comes from my Mom’s side, I think.”

“Come on, Buck. You’re not an angry guy.”

“Nah, I am. I just don’t get angry at other people.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothin’.”

“Have you called her lately?”

“Sis? Nah. I don’t like to call unless I’ve got good news.”

“...You think she’d freak out if she found out about us?”

“Little bit, definitely. Okay, maybe a lotta bit, but in a good way! She’d wanna throw a whole damn potluck.”

“Oh yeah, I can see it now. She’d invite everyone in the apartment, and somehow they’d all come.”

“Probably thinkin’ it’s an engagement party, cause o’ the way she told it.”

“And then somehow it would all end in a dance, and everyone would go home with baked goods!”

“That’s my sis. Go big or go home.”

“She made me promise I’d look out for you, you know?”

“She did?”

“It was…I dunno. You showed up at the end of summer, and I was sorta..scared of you.”

“Yeah, that’s fair.”

“I mean, you showed up with bruises, and she said you’d gotten in trouble, and you seemed so out of it, and so intense, you know? And then one day, I had just gotten Dinky to sleep, and I heard you screaming, and I thought you snapped or something!”

“Oh, I know this one.”

“I ran over to make sure Sissy was safe, and she was holding you, and you were crying, and she was crying with you. What was she saying to you?”

“She was comforting me. She was saying; "It’s just a scar, but it’s going to hurt, and you never know when.”

“What does that mean?”

“She was talkin’ about trauma. Sometimes you get buried under all the shit that’s happened, and you forget how to feel. Then it just hits you. It was then, that day, when it all hit me at once.”

"Well, once you calmed down, she came over and said; "If anything happens to me, can you check in with him sometimes? She said you'd been through a lot."

"Sounds like her."

“What happened to you over in the Bay Area, Buck? Is it the reason you…you know?”

“I made a lot of mistakes, and one of them was working a bachelorette party when I really shouldn’t have.”

“She called me last week.”

“Yeah? Did you tell her any of…any of this?”

“No. That’s the thing about magic. You don’t wanna tell anyone what’s going on, because they’ll get involved, and then it just gets messier and messier.”

Buck didn’t have an answer for that. That was true in high school, and it was still true now. Magic meant secrets and trouble and hospital bills.

“She asked about you. She always does, you know?”

“What’d you say?”

“That you’re doing your best.” Ditzy’s forehead touched Buck’s.

The conversation they needed to have hung like an elephant-sized sword over Buck’s head, but Ditzy’s gentle hands and gentler scolding settled him into a comfortable quiet that he’d been looking for all day.

He didn’t want to interrupt it, but if he didn’t say anything, the tension would just sit and fester until it stank up the room.

“...I think I’m going to get Sunburst to teach me magic from now on.” Buck managed.

“That’s good. What does Adagio think about that?”

“Doesn’t matter. I don’t think we’re gonna get any farther in my magic lessons. We’re not…I don’t wanna talk to her.”

“That’s good, too.”

“Ditzy, I know you’re mad at me. You don’t have to pretend like everything is fine. Please, just talk to me.”

"Okay, okay...I'm mad because you knew she would mess with you, but you went to her anyway. She's bad news, Buck. You know that!"

"She's also the whole reason I have even a little control over my magic. She did actually help me, you know? I guess there's no point in analyzing it."

"She was right about one thing. We need to talk about your needs. Silver Spoon said basically the same thing."

"Okay?"

"I know I'm not exactly what gets you going…"

"Not true. Not true at all, very definitely the opposite."

"Well, I know I'm not sexy like Adagio."

"You don't have to be!"

"Will you let me talk, Purple Prose!?"

"Sorry."

"Okay. I get that you're not getting what you want, and it's good that you're not hanging out with Adagio, but I figured you could…I dunno, maybe coach me a little? Just, like, tell me what you want me to do?"

"You want me to take charge and direct you?"

"No, no, okay, maybe a little, sometimes, but, like…I've been busting my brain trying to figure out what you like, and how I'm supposed to get you off when you're way, WAY more experienced than me. I feel like I'm out of my league. I mean, you made me go crazy the first time, and it took me like forty minutes to get you there with my girls."

"Muffin, you're the one that's outta my league."

"There's gotta be something I can do that will work on you! I just…I'm struggling, because I've never really taken the initiative on this kind of thing. I don’t have a lot of experience.”

“We can try some stuff and see how it goes. I didn’t think you’d want to get all that adventurous because of your trauma. I don’t want you to think you have to cater to me in the bedroom. It’s really not that important.”

“Yes, it is! If you’re not getting what you need from me, then…then we need to figure out how to do that! You know?”

“Okay, if you’re sure.”

“I am.” Ditzy hugged Buck, tightly, her face against his neck. It hurt a bit with Buck’s bruises, but he didn’t want to complain. She really was trying her hardest. The last of the tension finally left Buck’s body, and he slumped down, laying back on the couch with Ditzy in tow.

“Ow,” Buck said.

“You okay?”

“I hurt. But I’m relieved! I really thought you were gonna yell at me.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Yes I did. I almost did, I mean. That’s basically the same thing.”

“No it’s not! I know that Adagio is…well, you know, she’s a bunch of stuff, and I know you still like her, okay? And you know how I feel about that, but it’s not your fault that you’re in this situation. Anybody would be tempted…but you chose not to do anything bad, so that has to count for something. It…I was mad at first, but thinking about it, I think you’ve come a long way.”

“From when you kissed me for the first time?”

“Y…yeah.”

“That was naughty, Muffin.”

“It, well, that was, I was jealous, and you were just, really warm and sweet, and she’s so mean and I didn’t think about it, and it just sort of happened, okay?”

“I know, I know. I was there. You’re a good kisser. You reminded me of that, today.”

Buck was stroking her hair now. Ditzy sighed under Buck’s gentle fingers trailing against her scalp. She wondered if he practiced this and if he’d be mad if she asked.

“So…?”

“What?”

“Are you going to tell me?”

“About?”

“About s…sex…stuff. What do you want me to do?”

“Right now?”

“Do you have, uhm…do you have fetishes?”

“Mother of mercy, you’re adorable. Yeah, I’ve got fetishes, Muffin. Too many to count on one hand.”

“Ohh…okay, is there anything I can do to get you going?”

“You get me goin’ just by being nearby.”

“Come on, Buck! Tell me what to do! What do you want in the bedroom?”

“I guess I’ve never really thought about what I’d want.”

“Really?”

“Well, that’s not true. I guess what I mean is, I didn’t think any girl would care enough to ask.”

“Wow, seriously?”

“Wanna know a secret?”

“...okay.”

“A lot of the straight girls I’ve been with have been pretty inexperienced, too. They get socialized to just let the guy do what they want, so a lot of 'em just, like…lay there if you don’t direct them, and that’s pretty boring.”

Ditzy turned her body to look at Buck, blushing furiously.

“So…I’m pretty normal then?”

“Yeah, totally.”

“That’s a relief. Is there something I can do to excite you?”

“You could tell me I’m handsome.”

“Huh?”

“...Do you think I’m handsome?”

“Of course!”

“Okay, see, I didn’t know that.”

“How could you not know that?”

“You didn’t tell me! I thought you liked me because of my personality since I’m not the best looking.”

“You’re very handsome, though! Just look in the mirror! I mean, not right now, but you know what I mean!”

“No, it’s like…you know how it’s really annoying when dudes try to flatter you, and call you the hottest thing in the world?”

“Yep.”

“For guys, it’s the opposite. Nobody ever says straight guys look good. Ever. So those of us with low self-esteem, we just don’t know if we’re attractive or not, because nobody ever tells us.”

“Okay…so, you want me to say you’re attractive. I can do that.”

“Can you?”

“It's...words, you know? But I’ll try my best.”

“Okay.”

Buck sat up, waiting expectantly. After a second, Ditzy blinked and sucked in her lips, trying to focus.

“...I don’t know what to say.”

Buck laid back, looking at the ceiling.

“I guess that makes sense. I sure as hell don’t look pretty tonight.”

“That’s not true! Even sorta roughed up, you’re still you!”

“So what?”

“So…so…I think…you’re…pretty hunky!”

“Hunky?” Buck chuckled.

“Your muscles are sorta impressive! When you flex, they look really big! And…sometimes, when you’re getting ready for bed and you’re in your boxers, I look at your calves and like…wow.”

“Wow, huh?”

“And you’re hairy!”

“Okay?”

“It’s kinda manly, I dunno…” Ditzy tried to disappear against Buck’s neck, but he sat up, smiling.

“Is it?”

“You’re like the most…man sorta guy that I know! You’re really strong, and when you squeeze me, it gets me kinda… tingly.”

“Like when we hug? Or like right now?”

Ditzy’s eyes darted around, her expression distressed.

“Okay. That’s interesting. Here’s another one; I like that you touch me gently. I think you touch everyone gently, but you kind of pet me like a dog sometimes, and I like that, a lot.” Buck said.

“Yeah?” Ditzy said.

“I’m kind of starved for physical affection. That’s another guy thing, but also it’s a me thing. I’m not used to getting cuddles. Adagio isn’t the cuddly type, really, and I really like that you put your hands on me.”

“I knew it! So it’s not annoying when I touch you a bunch?”

“Not at all. I like it a lot. Especially that thing where I’m sitting down, and you just put your tits on me, from behind. That’s the best thing ever.”

“Okay, I’ll touch you with my boobies a bunch more! And…you could touch them more, too…okay?”

“Those’re really sensitive. You sure?”

“Yes!” Ditzy practically shouted it, then immediately covered her mouth. “I mean…I don’t like being surprised. You know that, so don’t…don’t do it out of nowhere. But when you’re hugging me? When we’re cuddling? If you want to maybe…touch them sometimes? Maybe, maybe get your hands under my shirt and play around? If I don’t want that, I’ll say no, but don’t be scared to touch them. I want you to.”

“You want me to stick my hands in your shirt?”

Ditzy nodded.

“Yes. Absolutely.”

“Now you do one!” Ditzy said.

“You know how you kissed me, today? You were pretty aggressive.”

“Yeah?”

“I want more of that.”

“You know I’m not really nasty like that…”

“It’s not nasty. It makes me feel wanted. I really need that.”

“I think I know what you mean…”

“Ditzy?”

“Yeah, Buck?”

“Do you wanna try it? Before we go to bed?”

"Okay!" Ditzy sat up, bouncing just a bit with excitement, smiling.

Buck leaned forward suddenly, and Ditzy closed her eyes. She giggled like a teenager, and her enthusiasm splashed onto Buck's face. He took Ditzy by the hand and watched the blush spread as he got closer.

"Hey…Ditzy?"

"Hm?"

"I love you, Ditzy Doo."

"I love you, too."

Buck kissed the corner of her mouth. Ditzy made a soft whine, almost disappointed, but Buck planted tender little pecks on her cheek, drifting away until she squeezed his hand and came for his lips.

Ditzy's kisses were giddy, filled with the sort of excitement that comes with stealing from a cookie jar. Like she was doing something sort of bad but was beyond caring. Her man was here, and she wanted him to know how she felt; that was all that mattered.

When Buck came up for air, Ditzy's hands were on his wrists, encouraging him to touch her chest.

For once, Buck didn't have to think about it. Before he could begin to worry, Ditzy was kissing him again, laying back on the couch, whispering softly against his lips that he could be a little rougher.

“No bra…?” Buck said, hands wandering under Ditzy’s shirt. His fingers sunk into the plush heaven hiding just behind the thin cloth, feeling Ditzy’s pulse quicken with each little squeeze.

“I was going to go to bed!” Ditzy blurted. Buck brushed her nipples with his fingertips, drawing out a precious squeak.

“You sure about that?” Buck growled, nipping at Ditzy’s neck.

“Maybe I wanted you to notice…”

“Hard not to notice these stickin’ out.”

It had been a little while. Buck tried to remember what he learned before. Instead of pinching, Buck rolled Ditzy’s nipples between his thumbs and forefingers, then pressed down on them tenderly.

“Eeeeek!” Ditzy shivered and moaned against Buck’s ear.

“Is that good, Muffin?” Buck said. Ditzy’s back arched, pushing her breasts against Buck’s hands. She nodded frantically as Buck teased her. “I’m sorry? Can you say it a little louder?”

“It’s good! It’s good! Please don’t stop!” Ditzy moaned.

“You want me to squeeze ‘em some more?”

“Yes!”

Buck squished Ditzy’s breasts together and slid his hands all over them. Every time his fingers brushed her nipples, she shook and squeaked. Her thin lips came forward and kissed him again in an attempt to muffle the rising moans, but Buck could see Ditzy hanging on to the edge of the couch, shifting her thighs, trying to keep it together.

She tasted so sweet, Buck wondered if she’d taken a treat from work home. Buck hoped that this treat he was giving her would make her happy. She deserved a nice night after the day they’d both had.

Buck spun his thumbs around Ditzy’s nipples, seeing how soft and fast he could go before she got to the edge. The little sounds she made against his lips, her frantic kisses, and the whisper of Buck’s name in his ear was everything in the world to him. This strong, soft woman who wanted so badly to take care of him, this family he had found in spite of everything wrong with him.

Ditzy's gentle moans got louder as Buck prodded, squeezed, and caressed. It felt so good to be needed.

“Buck…wait. Stop.” Ditzy said.

Buck flinched away immediately. His hands came out from Ditzy’s nightshirt and rose in defense. Apologies gathered at his lips before he could even ask what was wrong.

“Sorry. I’m sorry!”

“Huh? No, no! That was really good!” Ditzy said, taking Buck’s hands. “I just…I don’t want to be the only one feeling good, you know?”

“Ah.”

“Can I ask you for one more thing?”

“Anything. Name it.”

“Is there something you want to do?”

“Me?”

“Yeah! I mean, you know what’s off-limits, but, is there anything you want to do to me?” Ditzy started the sentence confident, but she slowed and trailed off as she reached the end of it, blushing bright red and smiling nervously.

“Butt stuff.” Buck said.

“Wha-no! I don’t wanna, well, maybe if we…no!” Ditzy stammered.

“Okay, don’t worry about it.” Buck chuckled, scratching his head.

“Anything else?”

“...well there is another thing, and it’ll still involve lube. Lemmie go grab some.” Buck got up, and when he returned, he had a clear-colored bottle in his hand.

“Why do you have that?” Ditzy said, bewildered.

Buck just raised an eyebrow at her.

“Okay, dumb question, sorry.”

“Hey, hey, that’s alright. I’m not mad.” Buck said, kissing Ditzy on the forehead.

“So, what did you want to do?”

“Can you lay back for me?”

“Like this?”

Buck smiled as Ditzy shuffled down, her head resting on the arm of the couch.

“Remember what you did last time? I wanna take charge, this time.”

“Do you want me to…?”

“No, no, you’re good, let me just….”

Ditzy fidgeted as Buck unbuttoned her nightshirt. Somehow, even though this was the third time, Ditzy’s round, beautiful breasts caught Buck off guard. For a moment, he got lost in fondling them all over again, smirking as Ditzy squirmed.

“Buck…please…!”

“Right, right! This might be a little cold, okay?”

Ditzy flinched as Buck squirted a slippery, coconut-smelling liquid between her breasts. Buck put one foot on the ground and straddled Ditzy, lightly slapping his cock against her breasts.

“Now, can you squish’em together?” Buck said.

Ditzy tried to press her breasts together, but they kept slipping out of her grasp. She put her hands together at the bottom of her neck and squeezed her breasts with her arms.

“Is this okay?”

“That’s perfect…I’m gonna start moving, alright?”

“Mhm…gosh, you’re hard.”

“Issat a surprise, when my girlfriend is so damn hot?”

Ditzy smiled and turned her head away, shutting her eyes while Buck rolled his hips slowly.

Buck was still sore, but the feeling of his cock rubbing between Ditzy's breasts overrode the pain. Every slip of Buck’s dick in Ditzy's incredibly soft, pillowy clutch brought out a little hum, but that wasn’t enough for Buck. He needed her to feel it, too.

Ditzy covered her mouth. Buck had picked up the pace, and now his cock was making a squelching noise. He was rubbing Ditzy’s nipples in circles. Right on time with his pace. Ditzy moaned into her hand as he gave her the slightest pinch.

“Hey…mmm…fuck…hey, hey, Muffin? Why do you always look away when we do this stuff? Am I makin’ you nervous?” Buck said.

“No…no, it’s my eyes. I don’t want you to go soft just because my eyes are all donked up.”

“Ditzy, look at me.” Buck said, slowing down.

Ditzy shook her head.

“It’s not a big deal.”

“C’mere.” Buck took Ditzy by the chin and made her face him. One of her eyes darted down and saw Buck’s purple cock head poking out between her cleavage, gently touching her joined fingers, and she nearly turned away again, but Buck stroked her cheek and smiled down at her.

“I know this’s a weird time to say it, but you’re beautiful, Ditzy. Your eyes are beautiful. I want you to look at me, okay? I want you to be here with me, in this moment.”

Before tonight, Buck could’ve sworn Ditzy couldn’t blush any deeper than she already had. Now it looked like steam would start piping from her ears at any second.

Ditzy gave a small nod, her words failing her.

“I’m gonna go a little faster, alright?”

“Mhm!”

Buck humped Ditzy’s breasts harder and faster, watching Ditzy bite her lip. He savored every tiny reaction as he tugged on her nipples. Despite all of his training, he could feel himself edging up to an explosive finish.

“Buck? Does it feel good?”

“You feel….you feel ffffucking amazing, Muffin.”

“...you can go faster. You can do whatever you want, okay?”

Buck groaned and went even harder at it, watching Ditzy’s breasts jiggle with each heavy thrust. He steadied himself with a hand on the couch’s back, and let his hips take over.

He never wanted to stop. He wanted to do this before bed and when he woke up in the morning. He wanted to bury himself inside Ditzy Doo. He wanted to pull on her hair and slap her ass. He wanted to take Adagio by the fucking ankles and pound her so fucking hard-

Buck blinked.

He was right there. Right on the edge, his strokes slowing down, trying to savor the slippery pillows that were crushing his cock. He had almost made another mistake. He focused on Ditzy’s pale yellow eyes, the parting of her lips, her gentle moans.

Here was everything he needed, right beneath him, and he had the audacity to think of…

“Buck? Are you close?”

“Fuck…yeah, Muffin, I’m real close!”

“C-can, can I ask you for one more thing?”

“Now!? Y-yeah! Of course! God damn….god you feel so fucking good!”

“You always…you’re always trying to take care of me here, and…just once, just this once, can you look at me the way you look at Adagio?”

Buck came to a dead stop.

“Huh!?”

“You always look so thirsty with her. When you were together, you always looked like at any moment you would, you know…pounce? Can you get like that for me? Please?”

Buck wanted to argue, and reassure her. He wanted to remind her that she was beautiful and unique, and she didn’t need to measure up to anybody.

But that’s what was going on in the head on his shoulders. Another head, currently being sandwiched between two slices of heaven, had other plans.

“Move your hands down and squeeze harder.” Buck said. Ditzy immediately obeyed, pressing down on the sides of her breasts with her knuckles.

Buck let out a hissing breath and rammed his hips forward. Ditzy gasped as he pinched her nipple.

From Ditzy’s perspective, it was like a switch had flipped in Buck’s head. His eyes turned sharp and thirsty, and his tender concern slid into a grin that made her burn up between her legs. Ditzy could swear she saw a flash of red, but her eyes darted down and she saw the changeling stone necklace dangling from Buck’s neck. She was safe.

Before long, Ditzy was moaning right along with him as he rocked her whole body with each thrust.

“You’re too….fucking…cute!” Buck growled. “You tryna make me cum right now? Want me to cum all over that pretty face?”

It was like the first time he ever jerked off. It was like his first proper night with Her. It was like his first night with Adagio. Blood was rushing into his brain, banishing any sense and filling his head with fuck.

“I…I want you to cum, Buck!”

“FfffUCK!”

It was over in an instant. Buck had a hand on Ditzy’s head, howling as he unloaded a fat wad of cum all over her face and neck. Buck’s cock bounced free of Ditzy’s cleavage, and he pumped it frantically, squirting out his whole damn soul on Ditzy.

When Buck finally caught his breath and rubbed the orgasmic haze out of his eyes, he saw Ditzy laying beneath him, one eye peaking out from the spunk that was painting her.

“Geez…you really made a mess of me.” Ditzy said.

“Didn’t think I had it in me, huh?” Buck chuckled.

“Didn’t think there would be so much!” Ditzy laughed.

“Phew, yeah…feel like I can fit into a new pair of boxers, now!”

“...Buck?”

“Yeah, Muffin?”

“Can you get off me? I need to wipe this gunk off my face.”

“Oh, yeah, right! Sure thing.”

Buck dismounted and offered Ditzy a hand up. Even with jizz dribbling down her chin, Ditzy managed to seem dainty and adorable as she went to the kitchen.

Buck couldn’t help but watch her as she moved. The subtle bounce of her unbound breasts, the slope of her violin hips, the sudden rigidness that came over her as she almost stumbled, it all came together to form a charm he knew he’d never find again in a million years.

Ditzy looked back from the sink with a clean face and a goofy smile. She still seemed a little uncertain about the night, or maybe something else was on her mind.

There was still just one thing on Buck’s mind, however, and he rose to make it known.

“Hey, Ditzy?”

“Yeah, Buck?”

“Is that what turns you on? When I get greedy?”

“I! I dunno, I guess I never thought about it that much…it’s just nice to, uh…to just let you have control! It’s pretty hot…you know?”

“You are such a sub.” Buck smiled, shaking his head. He was around the couch now.

“It was just a little experiment! Don’t make fun!” Ditzy huffed.

“Oh yeah? So the experiment’s over?” Buck said, taking a step closer as Ditzy dried her face.

“I mean, you came, so uh…”

“But you didn’t. So we’re not done.” Buck said. His hands touched Ditzy’s hips. Strong and firm, but gentle.

“Hm?” Ditzy felt a hard heat against her butt, then a breath against her ear. She froze up as Buck’s fingers slid around to her stomach.

“Lemmie make a lil’ bit more fun, Muffin.”

Those big purple hands moved down and gave Ditzy a shiver.

“What’re you gonna do, Buck?”

“I wanna eat my Muffin. I wanna make her scream.”

“Okay, Buck…”

“Turn around. Look at me.”

Ditzy obeyed with hesitation. Buck saw her knees turning in as his hand covered hers on the countertop.

“Do you want this?”

“...yes!” Ditzy squeaked.

And then her arms were around Buck’s neck, while Buck’s hands groped her ass. Her kisses were desperate and needy, and before long, Ditzy found herself with her back against the refrigerator while Buck dropped to his knees, yanking her pyjama bottoms down.

Ditzy moaned and giggled as Buck’s tongue trailed up her inner thigh. He slung her leg over his shoulder and got to work without a moment’s hesitation, lapping at her clitoris with total abandon.

“Okay…okay…you’re…really going at it down there…!”

“Mmmhm!” Buck’s dug his tongue into Ditzy, swirling it, drinking her in without thought to technique or rhythm. Ditzy found herself lost, rambling as she watched Buck’s head bounce between her thighs, caught in his intense stare.

“Buck? What’re you, ooh!” Buck put Ditzy’s other leg over his shoulder, and suddenly she was up in the air, holding on to the edges of the fridge at her back as Buck lifted her on his shoulders. “Oh gosh! Oh…ohhhh gosh!”

Buck's licking only got faster and more intense. Ditzy was rising like she had the first time Buck got between her legs. Her brain fried in the heated space between excitement and arousal and joy, hanging on to the world for fear that she might fall into the sky.

Ditzy’s moans turned into high squeaks and then screams as she crashed headfirst into an intense orgasm.

Buck didn’t slow down for a second, his tongue twirling around Ditzy’s clitoris as she pulled at his hair, her thighs shaking as they squeezed his face, and she thought then that it was fine.

They were going to be fine, all they had to do was talk a little, and they could figure this out. He wanted her so badly! What had she even been worried about?

Ditzy was overflowing with love and joy, but then, between crashing waves of pleasure, she opened her eyes.

A strange, multicolored glow was in the room.

From the reflection of the TV, Ditzy could see a pair of fluffy wings had sprouted from her back. She squealed, trying to find words as Buck’s tongue dug deep inside her. It felt so impossibly good and so horribly wrong, but Ditzy was caught between chest-rattling gasps. Her heartbeat, already hammering, skipped a beat as she tried to come back to reality.

There was something hard and smooth between her fingers. Ditzy looked down.

It was purple, like Buck’s skin, and it was long, curved, and stubby at the end, protruding from his forehead like the handle on a ship’s wheel.

Ditzy saw a faint red glow coming from Buck’s eyes as his tongue continued its work, and as another orgasm shattered her senses, Ditzy began to panic.

“Wait…wait, Buck! Wait!”

And he stopped. Buck retracted his tongue, which seemed quite a bit longer than Ditzy remembered, and he looked up at her. His expression was a tender concern, but his eyes were furious red coals.

Ditzy screeched in terror, screaming for Buck to put her down, to let her go--to get away from her.

“No, no, no DON’T TOUCH ME!”

“Ditzy, what’s wrong? What did I do!?”

“What did you do!? Look at your face!” Ditzy shouted, pointing at the TV, and Buck’s heart sank as he turned to look.
A demon looked back.

“Wait, wait, that doesn’t make sense! I’m wearing the necklace! That’s not-”

“STAY AWAY!”

Ditzy’s bedroom door slammed in Buck’s face.

There was nothing to be said, and nothing to be done. Buck held a scream in his chest and turned to leave. He squeezed the stone hanging from his neck and felt a prick.

His hand came away bloody. What had been a nearly flawless marble had a deep fissure down its side.
Buck distantly thought it must have been the fight, it must have cracked between the hammer and the fist, but it didn’t matter.

He knew this was his fault.

Buck shuffled off to his apartment, searching for a sleep that simply would not come.

Across town, Starlight Glimmer laid back on the couch, flipping slowly through a leatherbound book with a swirling pattern of grey stars on the front.

“Sunburst, do you know anything about undead?”

“Not really, to be honest. Something as nasty as that is probably in the “forbidden” category of arcane academia. We would need to special order, if we can get any access at all.”

“Well, if we can’t get a grasp of what we’re up against and figure out their weakness, our uphill battle is just going to get steeper and steeper.”

“We can worry about that in the morning. We’ve got plenty of information to digest from the day’s events and I think we should use tomorrow to recover before we double down. Since Scootaloo is going to be out of commission for a week at the very least, we have to weigh our options and decide what the next step is.”

“I can’t believe I got benched after my first day as an intern!” Scootaloo said, crossing her arms.

“You did fantastic, Scoots. Considering how you performed out there, I’d be surprised if the Pillars don’t call you in the next day or so to sign you up properly.” Sunburst said.

“You mean it!?”

“He does. And so do I, though I have some critiques.” Starlight said.

“I’m sure Buck will have some valuable insights, since he and Ditzy were the ones to actually beat your assailant back. Whenever they get back, we can debrief, and that will be it for tonight.” Sunburst said.

There was a knock on the door.

“Speak of the devil…could you get that? I’m exhausted.” Starlight said, nodding at Sunburst, who was already on his feet.

“I was honestly getting worried! What took you so long?” Sunburst said, with a bright smile on his face as he opened the door.

That warm welcome died like a covered candle as Sunburst saw the look on Adagio’s face. Her eyes were red and puffy, and her raised chin and bitter frown told him more about her evening than Sunburst wanted to ask.

“...where’s Buck?”

“We’re not on speaking terms at the moment.” Adagio said and strolled right past Sunburst, taking a seat on the arm of the couch.

“What did you do to him?” Starlight growled.

“We had a little heart to heart, and neither of us liked where it went. He went home to be with his house spouse.” Adagio rolled her eyes, refusing to look at anything in particular. “That’s the bad news. The good news is that I’m quite certain I know what our mysterious friends are after. Before you bumble into a counter attack, I need some critical information. Tell me everything you know about Camp Everfree.”

Author's Note

Song Review: Among Freddie Mercury's hilariously large discography, Great Pretender has to be in my personal top ten. It's a rare cover of an older song, and despite the morose nature of the lyrics, Freddie Mercury pulls it off with his typical panache. This song is from his solo days.

If you look at the music videos in order, it becomes apparent that Freddie Mercury's chaotic queer energy only grew stronger and stronger as the years rolled on and the tours stacked up, with Great Pretender being a wonderful encapsulation and celebration of Mercury's strength as a solo act.
Here we see Freddie singing his heart out, bolstered by backing vocals performed by drag queens as he relives the recent glories of his career. Yet despite the sheer theatrical magnetism of the man, he chose to cover this song to spotlight his lonely side.

The lyrics speak of a man who has lost the love of his life. In the case of Freddie, it was Mary Austin, who left him when she found out he was bisexual. In truth, Freddie Mercury was a very private man who kept his woes and emotional turmoil away from his career and bandmates, suffering in silence. The Great Pretender doesn't romanticize this; it instead asserts that a man can dominate their field with a wink and a flourish and still be falling apart in private.

Such is the case for our three romantic leads, who each in their own way have wrapped themselves in a kind of denial over the goings-on, hoping that they can dance and sing their way through the chaos and still come out smiling on the other side.