The Last Hearts and Hooves Day

Hearts and Hooves Day has arrived and ponies across all of Equestria are celebrating the day of love. While some ponies aren't in a relationship, they still see it as a chance to show their family and friends that they care about them. There is one pony whoever, that utterly despises the holiday and all that it stands for. That pony is Dr. M. Colgate, the local dentist down in Ponyville. To her it is a holiday that does nothing but encourage ponies to eat food that is bad for their teeth and to brainwash ponies into believing love is real. To her love was nothing more than a sham where ponies took advantage of one another.

It was early on Heart's and Hooves Day and the sun woke up Colgate. She stretched out and groaned in frustration as she knew what day it was. She knew that it was the day that ponies would be going out to fancy dinners, giving gifts of candy and doing nothing but showing public displays of affection that should never be done out in public. The more Colgate thought about this, the more pissed off she became. By the time she got downstairs to fix herself some breakfast, her blood was already boiling.

Colgate's younger sister Lyra Heartstrings lived with her. Lyra, unlike her sister, had a special somepony and absolutely loved the holiday. There was one thing that did unnerve her though, her elder sister's opinion of the holiday and her hatred of her marefriend, Bon Bon. When Colgate finally arrived in the kitchen Lyra asked, "So sis, what's for breakfast this morning?"

Colgate snapped, "We're having eggs, bacon, toast and cider just like always! I don't know why the hell you have to ask." Colgate then put on some music and turned the volume up high, high enough that it could likely be heard outside. Once the music began to play she let out a less stressed sigh, "Nothing like some Iron Mareden to start out the day with, right sis?"

Lyra wasn't exactly the biggest fan of the music that her sister listened to and sighed as frustration as Colgate began to caterwaul in an attempt to sing the lyrics. This is one thing that truly irritated Lyra as she always started the day out with metal music but whenever Hearts and Hooves Day came around, she always turned the volume up a lot higher and despite having absolutely no talent, she would attempt to sing to the lyrics.

She sighed, "If you say so. I'd rather we listen to something romantic but I know how much you hate that kind of stuff."

Colgate snapped, "Damn straight I hate that shit." She raised her voice and added, "If I were dictator of this country I'd ban all this sappy romantic shit."

Lyra sighed, "Good thing you're not the princess then."

Colgate blew off the comment and got to fixing their breakfast. While she was cooking, Colgate began to mumble, "Ugh, I hope Lyra doesn't get all sappy over this shitty holiday and she better not bring that bitch marefriend of hers over. I fucking hate her, I absolutely fucking hate her." Her anger then caused her to think out loud, "Ugh, if only there was a way to kill this stupid holiday."

Lyra heard her somewhat and asked, "What, you want to kill Bon Bon?"

Colgate snapped, "If I could get away with it I'd do it. You know I don't approve of that relationship you have with her. I don't know why the hell you couldn't have hooked up with somepony nice like one of the florists." She then gagged a bit, "Hell, even that diva Rarity would have been far better than her. At least she isn't a grade A bitch all the time."

Lyra was less than thrilled, "Look, Bon Bon is good to me and we seem to click. I know I could never click with a drama queen like Rarity."

Colgate grunted, "Whatever but do know this, I will NEVER approve of Bon Bon, her frowns and her cavity causing crap, ever."

Lyra decided it would be best to remain quiet and just let Colgate enjoy her metal as she cooked. One thing that she was happy about though was that it was Saturday which meant that she didn't have to be in the office all day putting up with her sister's mood swings. Rather than putting up with that, she could instead go and spend time with her marefriend and with it being Hearts and Hooves Day, she knew that Bon Bon would likely have something special planned for them.

After she finished her breakfast and saw that Colgate was in the kitchen getting seconds, she decided it would be best if she left before Colgate could question her over her plans for the day. Once she got out of the house she sighed in relief, "Thank goodness. It is so nice to get away from her even if it is just for a few hours!"

When Colgate noticed she was gone, she knew where she had gone and was not one bit happy about it. She stuck her head out the door and saw Lyra headed in the direction of Bon Bon's house. She was infuriated when she saw this and hoped to get her sister's attention before it was too late, "Lyra Heartstrings, you get your flank back here! It is your turn to do the dishes!"

It would do no good though as Lyra was already well out of ear shot. Colgate grunted in frustration as she headed back in the house to finish her meal. Once inside, she turned the volume all the way up on her music and began to think about the whole situation. Her thoughts would then turn back to the holiday she hated so much. She quickly began to wonder if there wasn't some sort of way to rid the world of the holiday.

She did learn some about the holiday in her school and remembered how it came about as a result of an earth pony prince serving an Alicorn princess some sort of love poison that pretty much incapacitated the two of them. She then remembered how that resulted in a dragon attacking, the citizens killing the prince and princess and then everything going straight to hell. She got a smile on her face and said to herself, "What would have happened had the situation with the love poison never happened? What if they had been killed prior to that happening?"

Colgate then realized that she would have to travel through time yet she had no idea on how to do it. She then thought that perhaps she could enlist the one pony in town who knew how to to aid her, Starlight Glimmer. She knew that getting her to help her would be tough, especially given her past and the fact that she is pretty much joined at the hip with Twilight. She sighed, "Well maybe Twilight will leave town and Starlight will stay behind. That way, I could get her to help me out with this. In the end, Twilight would never know she helped me at all.