Episode 18: Dr. Whooves on the Daily Show

Even though it was a small restaurant with only three employees, the Corner Street Eatery did very well financially and had a diverse customer base. It would be quite some time before it became a franchise and branched out to other towns in Equestria, but for the time being they were well known in Ponyville with a steady flow customers coming in and out both old and new.

But even with their moderate popularity Choatcheck never in his time had to break up a fight or get himself physically involved with one of his patrons. He liked to believe it was because his food and restaurant atmosphere only attracted the most well rounded and respectful of ponies.

The back and forth between Jon and Whooves marked the first time Coatcheck had to step in to defuse a possibly volatile situation; not just for maintaining the status quo of his business but more to assist his two friends. Fortunately, by the time he left the kitchen and was back into the outdoor patio that was his front yard, both parties had already sat back down and were in the middle of lengthy discussion with Jon quietly explaining himself.

Nevertheless, Coatcheck felt it necessary to ask if everything was alright. And although he knew something was wrong, since he had never seen Whooves acting so terrified, he was assured by both patrons that his involvement wasn’t needed though duly appreciated. Whooves begged his old friend to leave them be and go about his business and he in turn relayed that same message to the other guests who by now were ignoring their meals in favor of trying to overhear what the human was whispering to the doctor.

After some time had past things returned to normal, or at least as normal as they could get following such an explosion of conflicting emotions, with Jon now trying his best to make sense of it all. Some guests were already done eating but chose to stay anyway, their imaginations ran wild with speculations as to what Jon had said to make Whooves want to run away and indeed what he was currently saying to make him sit still, wide eyed, and listening intently, as if Jon was reading the numbers of the winning lottery ticket.

Even if everyone could hear what he was saying they wouldn't have been able to understand any of it, such was the case with Whooves himself. He sat there with a mind as open as his mouth as Jon threw foreign words around like: BBC, Tardis, Dalek, and other terminologies that made very little sense to him but as a whole brought him to a startling revelation.

“A television show?” Dr. Whooves concluded. “There’s a television show about me?”

At first he didn’t believe it but when he considered all the sense it made he couldn't escape it and was forced to concede. It was the only explanation as to how Jon could possibly know so much about him for only having just met him. Plus as nonsensical as it sounded he himself was a time traveler which was only slightly less believable.

“That’s right. I didn’t put two and two together till just now, but yes, back in my world there’s this really old TV show about a time traveling doctor,” Jon added. “That’s how I suspected you had a time machine... aside from the fact that you’re a pony you could pass for the character by your similar aspects.”

Usually this would be the part where Whooves took another sip of his tea, which by now was cold since he had been too busy listening to Jon explain how his life was a reflection of something else in another world. Everything about him, everything that made him unique and his own being already existed in an alternate reality. The mere fact that it happened to be a television show was just the cherry on top of his having to evaluate his own multiplied reality.

Jon was all too understanding about the situation and remained quiet to allow Whooves the silence necessary to analyze all that had been said. It was a lot to take in let alone understand and one could only fathom what confusing thoughts traversed Whooves’ mind as he dealt with the existentialism that his presence and essence was not solely linked to Equestria, but also in the world of humans.

Some ponies who were present in the restaurant (either because they were still eating or they were waiting to see what would happen next) watched as Jon patiently waited while Whooves had his nose pointed skywards in deep thought with his eyes closed, almost as if he was praying. Eventually there was movement once again in the almost lifeless body of the doctor when he lowered his head to finally address Jon by asking but one single thing.

After all that he had learned one could only imagine the infinite amount of questions that could be asked after learning what he had learned. Jon was already braced to try his best and answer inquiries Whooves had ranging inquiries from his own existence to the notion that his physiognomy existed in a parallel world. But what he asked was something that not even Jon could answer.

“Is it any good?” Whooves asked.

“E-excuse me?” Jon asked in return.

“The show, Dr. Who... is it any good?” he elaborated, much to Jon’s surprise.

“O-oh, um... well I don’t really know,” Jon answered cautiously like he was on a gameshow. “I uh... I don’t actually watch the show I just know of it. Not really my thing.”

“Ah, I see,” Whooves commented while lifting his cup of tea to his face. “What a shame.”

By tilting his cup at different angles he began to examine his beverage, which hadn’t been attended too much lately. During this inspection Jon assumed he would have more questions to ask of him but he never did. From there the only thing that happened was Whooves motioning for Coatcheck to bring him a new cup of tea, leaving Jon to start inquiring.

“W-wait... is... is that it?” Jon asked, perplexed. “Is that all you want to ask of me?”

“Hm? Oh, yes that is all,” Whooves answered peaking over to his side at the entrance to the main house. “Now, where is Coatcheck with my drink?”

“S-seriously!?” Jon exclaimed. “That’s seriously all you want to know about all this? What happened to all of that stuff back there about ‘how did you find me’ or ‘who sent you’ and whatever!?”

“Well, you already explained that to me didn’t ya?” Whooves shot back, still looking over for his drink. “Back in your world there’s a television program involving a doctor, a doctor who... heh heh ‘doctor who’... anyway, a doctor who time travels by way of a blue tardis. You managed to reveal my identity by drawing parallels between myself and the character who looks, sounds, and has the same properties as I do.”

“And that seriously doesn’t make you want to know more about what’s going on here!?” Jon urged just as Coatcheck came by with a piping hot new cup of tea for his Earthpony friend.

“What’s there to know?” Whooves asked, making sure Coatcheck had left before continuing. “Trust me, in my line of work this is all very typical. Granted you spooked me a bit and I must admit the fact alone that my existence continues elsewhere as a form of entertainment is a bit... let’s say unexpected... but the fact of the matter is alternate universes, dimensions and conjoining realities are very much a real thing. And I believe no pony knows more about that than you and me... correct me if I’m wrong but haven’t you experienced this first hand as well?”

He had a point. While Whooves had the benefit of the doubt since he was a time traveler, Jon had been coming and going between his world and Equestria several times now and the more he did the more he realized how both could be looked at as alternate realities of each other. The biggest example on a more personal level would be his living in New York’s Manhattan while in Equestria there was a city he’d never visited by the name of Manehatten.

Did that place have a pony version of Jon and his family? He had no way of knowing but if there was he would definitely not be as blasé about it as his time traveling friend here.

“Well... be that as it may you’re taking this news remarkably well,” Jon complemented while rubbing the back of his head. “Gosh I remember when I started talking with some of the ponies here in Equestria... so many of them were amazed to find out that I was real and that the ‘Daily Show’ wasn’t just something someone had made up.”

The cup of tea that Whooves was all too eager to drink was inches away from his lips when something Jon had said caused him to momentarily stop in his tracks. Adjusting his vision he looked over at Jon with confused eyes while at the same time trying his hardest to hide a smile from appearing on his face.

“I’m sorry but... what?” Whooves asked.

“Did... did I say something odd?” Jon asked back.

“You said ponies here were shocked to discover something called ‘The Daily Show’ was real?” he explained, leaving Jon further confused.

“Yes... the ‘Daily Show.’ You know... my show... the show I host,” Jon repeated himself which only made Whooves look more confused. “You’ve... you’ve seriously never heard of my show? Oh c'mon it’s huge here and your wife watches it all the time!”

Once Jon made the connection between his program and Whooves’ beloved Derpy a look of realization swept over his face, causing him to finally take a sip of tea as if it was a reward.

“Oh of course! The ‘Daily Show’!” he exclaimed. “Quite right, quite right, now I recall.”

“I’m a... I’m honestly surprised you didn’t know about it,” Jon commented.

“Terribly sorry about that,” Whooves assured him as he allowed his toothy grin to finally break free. “‘I don’t actually watch the show I just know of it. Not really my thing.’”

As a comedian who both trained and was himself trained in the art of making other people look stupid, Jon was mentally kicking himself for having walked in head first like that. Maybe it was due to his still being buzzed, but for now Jon understood where Whooves stood on the issue.

“Okay, okay, you don’t have any questions for me; I get it,” Jon addressed with his hands outward defensively. “But I, on the other hand... have a whole lotta things I want to ask you.”

There was an unspoken though mutual understanding between the two regarding Dr. Whooves identity and what it meant that someone like Jon knew about it. Rather than just outright asking whatever he wanted, Jon decided to give him another fair warning lest they repeat the violent outburst on behalf of Whooves (an incident he was already making plans to have never existed).

“I see... well if you start asking about my name again I'm leaving. Ha! I jest, I jest... but, I’m sure you can appreciate that I won’t be able to answer all of your inquiries,” Whooves explained, putting his tea down to mark how serious he was now. “As a timetraveler there is a strict code of ethics that I must adhere too, as I’m sure you can understand.”

“I... I am aware of this,” Jon said. “Also, I guess you just answered my first question?’

“Is that so?” Whooves rebutted. “And what would that be?”

With more questions than Jon could ever remember having for a single pony he still found himself going back to the same one over and over again. It wasn’t by any means an intrusive one or one meant to suggest that he didn’t believe him, but rather Jon just trying to further grasp the situation.

“So... you’re really a time traveller, aren’t you?” Jon asked, his face poised to adjust to any emotion that would be deemed necessary from any answer. Pausing for a moment, Whooves raised his cup of tea to his mouth, taking his time as he slowly drank from it like it was his first time doing so. With a quick sigh he placed his cup back down and gave Jon the answer he wanted to hear.

“Yes,” Whooves answered. “Yes, I am.”

A flood of new possibilities rushed through Jon’s mind. He didn’t have time to think of the moral or ethical parameters at play here, his only thought was how he could use this to his advantage. But as the old saying goes he forced himself to take a step back and take into consideration whether or not this was indeed all too good to be true.

“I... I see,” Jon gulped as he nervously began to shake his leg while drumming his fingers against the table’s surface like a child being given too much sugar. “Well that’s... that’s certainly a bold claim to make.”

“It sounds as if you don’t believe me all of a sudden,” Whooves commented with a lone suspiciously raised eyebrow.

“Well I mean... don’t get me wrong but anyone can just say they’re a time traveler,” Jon accused with the same level of caution one would use when poking a sleeping bear or hornet’s nest. “I mean... remember when I accused you of being a con-man?”

“I most certainly do,” Whooves answered with sharp eyes. “I hope you don’t still think that I--”

It took him a while but before he could finish his thought Whooves realized that in actuality Jon’s statement was but a clever ruse, the likes of which one might apply on a child to clean their room or eat their veggies.

“Aaaaaah I see now,” Whooves smiled. “You want proof, don’t you?”

“Look aaall I’m saying is I only have your word that you actually have a time machine,” Jon coaxed, trying his best not to rush things too hard. “For all I know you’re still trying to trick me and your little freak out back there was all just an act.”

Jon was certain his continued accusations would leave Whooves irate and uncomfortable. Both for continuing to imply he was lying and by reminding him of his little bout of paranoia powerful enough to make him run away in fear.

However his suspicions were found to be the exact opposite of what would occur, leaving Jon surprised more than anything else. With a quick thrust backwards like he was attempting to dodge a bullet, the brown coated Earthpony threw his head upwards and commenced to push all the air out of his lungs.

“Ahhhh ha ha, I must say you flatter me Mr. Stewart!” Whooves said after a lengthy bout of laughter. “To think that you’d believe me to be as good an actor as I assume my human counterpart to be.”

“Well, like I said I only have your word that you are who you say you are.” Jon shrugged, now making sure to tread more lightly. “So... so yes some proof would be nice; it’s the only thing that matters.”

Jon didn’t know which was more scary, the fact that this pony was who he said he was or the smile currently creeping on his face.

“You know what Mr. Stewart? I like you! I can see why my wife enjoys watching your program,” Whooves complimented as he reached down to fetch his leather satchel. “I’ll tell you what I’ll do... I’ll prove to you once and for all that I’m the real deal, so to speak, once and for all!”

“And how pray tell do you plan on doing that?” Jon asked, now on the edge of his seat.

“Simple! By showing you the wondrous device that I have in my possession,” he explained while undoing the strap and shoving his hoof within his leather pouch . “Just give me a moment.”

From there no other words were uttered with the only sound to be heard that of Whooves rummaging through his bag for the device he had proclaimed would convince Jon of his validity. Though even if he wanted to speak he found it impossible.

Jon couldn't even begin to speculate as to what Whooves could possibly possess to give him the proof he so badly wanted. For all he knew it could be some futuristic device that was thousands of years more advanced than anything thus invented or perhaps the skeleton of an ancient proto-pony from back in the stone age.

The thought also came to mind that, although he no longer believed it to be fact, if he was indeed a con artist whatever he would show him could just as well be a fake in an attempt to continue his charade. Surely whatever he produced would need to be of great weight and importance to convince Jon of something so ludicrous as the notion he was having lunch with a time traveling pony; and there was no way his time machine was compact enough to fit in his bag.

“Hmph. Unless he produces a ‘time traveler’s membership card’ I think I should remain a little bit skeptical,” Jon thought as he watched the bow-tie wearing pony continue searching through his belongings. “Why doesn’t he just show me his time machine? I mean sure it’s probably back home but what could he possibly have that--”

Just then Jon was reminded back when Whooves almost ran out on him when he first inquired about his time machine. Aside from it being a major break from his character there was one thing he remembered clearly, and that was how he made an attempt to retrieve his bag before departing, as if it contained something he couldn't leave behind.

That wasn’t the only thing that crossed Jon’s mind. He also recalled something about the Doctor from the television show back home. Even though he never much watched the program himself he did know that there was a certain item that every doctor always had, a small mechanism that was as much a signature device to the Doctor as the Tardis itself.

“Could it be?” Jon thought with increased anticipation. “Is it possible that this Dr. Who also has... that?”