My Little Pony Tales: Rule 63 Edition

The SUV stopped outside Babar's house. "Okay, Babar, I believe this is your stop," Heartling's father said. "Got any plans for the day?"

"Yep! Dad's taking me to the theater. Thanks for the camping trip," Babar said. "And sorry about what Rhapsody and Patch did, Heartling…"

"That's fine… I think I'll just have a camping trip in the backyard next time."

Babar got out and approached the front door to his home as the SUV left.

He jumped in shock when the windows to the house suddenly shattered in unison, causing shards of broken glass to scatter onto the floor. Babar ran away from them.

He opened his eyes, then cautiously approached the house again. He opened the door. "Mom? Dad?" He looked around to see broken glass on the floor beneath framed photos that now lacked their glass covering. Something very odd was going on… treading carefully, he went upstairs.

From his baby sister's room at the end of the corridor, he could hear her breathing. Curious, he headed in that direction.

"Ah... CHOO!"

The force of the explosive sneeze sent Babar flying backward through the corridor until he hit a wall. He fell down onto the ground, after which plaster from the wall crumbled away, leaving a pony-shaped gap.

Before he could gather his bearings, his younger brother also went flying into the wall before landing on Babar.

"Oof!" Babar exclaimed. "Andy? What's—"

He was interrupted when their younger sister hit the stripped wall before falling onto Andy, causing Babar even more physical stress. "Ow."

The three siblings picked themselves up. "Babar! You're home!" the young girl exclaimed, happy to see her older brother.

"Nice to see you too, Star." Babar gave the younger two a hug. "But what on earth is going on?"

Hesitant, he decided to go back in the direction of Maple's bedroom, preparing to dart into one of the rooms in the corridor if he heard her begin to sneeze again. Sneezes were rarely as powerful as that first one had been, but his back still hurt.

He nervously entered the bedroom, taking note of the upturned furniture and the feathers scattered around. It seemed the explosive sneeze had destroyed a pillow or two. "Hello? Anybody?"

His parents turned out to be inside the closet. They slowly opened the door, then stepped out. "Oh, hello, Babar," his mother said. "Did you enjoy your camping trip?"

"Kind of… but what's going on?"

"Why's she 'sploding?" Andy asked, appearing in the room alongside Star.

"She's not exploding, Andy, she's sneezing," their father explained. "Poor Maple's sick."

"Is she gonna be okay?" Babar asked.

"She'll be fine, it's just a bad cold. But I'm not so sure about her room," their father chuckled.

"Good!" Babar said. "Then we can still go to the theater?"

"I'm afraid not," his father replied. "I have to get Maple some medicine."

"But… but you promised!" Babar protested.

"Babar, I have to make sure she gets well."

"Indeed," his mother affirmed, nodding as she cradled Maple. "We're going to need all hooves on deck."

Babar groaned as he entered the kitchen. His plans to watch a movie were shot, and on top of that, he'd have to spend the day working, all because they'd heard his sister start to cough and sneeze. His older brother was already inside, measuring out formula and medicine for their baby sister. "Miles?"

Miles looked down. "Hey, squirt," he said. "How was the camping trip?"

"Long story…" Babar said. "But Mom asked me to give you a hand with the medicine."

"I think I got it under control," Miles replied, continuing to pour. "Besides, I have to concentrate. Why don't you go see if Ruby needs help?"

"Okay… have you seen her?"

"Over here," their other sister called from behind.

Babar turned around, but only saw a large pile of laundry. "Ruby?" He approached the pile before Ruby poked her freckled face out, at which Babar jumped in surprise, not having expected her to be inside. True to her name, she usually had a large red bow on her head, but it seemed she'd decided to shake things up today by wearing a blue one instead.

"Heh, didn't mean to scare ya," his younger sister greeted.

Babar chuckled and got down before he leapt off the ground and bombed into the pile.

Ruby's demeanor quickly turned sour. "This isn't a game, Babar!" she snapped. "I'm trying to help Mom with the laundry! Maple is sick, you know! Now give me a helping hoof!"

Babar sighed. "I know, I know… how does one sick baby pony get this much attention? I'm so sick of Maple being sick!"

After he and Ruby had painstakingly dealt with the laundry, Babar sat in his room, contemplating. He didn't have long to do it, because soon enough, he would inevitably be called upon to perform some other chore. He didn't even have free reign of the kitchen to do any baking. If only he could be pampered like Maple instead of having to run here and there… he'd fall down dizzy if it went on much longer.

'Fall down dizzy… that's it!' The solution became apparent. If he pretended to be sick, then he would be able to sit back and relax and not have to do any chores! He went downstairs, preparing to put his plan into motion.

He entered the kitchen. Perfect. There was a fairly large audience. He coughed several times, then looked around to gauge everyone's reactions.

"Did someone just cough?" his mother asked, looking away from the stove and at everyone else.

"I heard it too," his father said.

"It wasn't me," Miles denied.

"Me neither!" Ruby called.

"I think it was me…" Babar said wearily, holding a hoof to his head. He groaned some more, then coughed several more times. "Ohh… yes, it was definitely me…"

"Hey, Babar, what's going on?" Ruby asked, approaching him.

"Gee, are you okay?" Miles asked.

"Yeah…" Babar coughed once, causing Ruby to step back a bit. "I mean no… I don't think I feel very good…" Now for the grand finale. He fell over backward, doing his best not to hit his head on the hard floor of the kitchen.

The others all looked over him in worry. "He looks very pale…" his father noted.

His mother felt his forehead with her hoof. "And he feels warm…"

"Oh no… he's sick too," Miles realized. "He must've caught it from Maple."

'Jackpot!' "Ohh… yeah… that's it… I'm sick too…" Babar parroted. "Someone's gonna need to carry me…"

His dad and brother looked at each other, nodded, then each picked up one half of Babar, grunting and groaning as they carried him into the living room. Transporting a pony with as big an appetite as Babar was no easy task. "Geez… for a little brother, you sure weigh a lot. You need to lay off the sweets," Miles told him.

They finally placed him onto the couch, and his mother placed a blanket over him.

"Looks like I need to make a special trip to the store for some medicine especially for Babar," his father said, while Miles turned the TV on for Babar.

"Where does it hurt, Babar?" his mother asked.

Babar verbally fumbled around, trying to figure out the best answer. "Um… ah… ooh…"

"Oh, poor Babar, you hurt everywhere?"

"Uh-huh…"

Just then, Babar heard a familiar jingle outside. This could only mean one thing… the ice cream truck was passing through! He leapt off the couch and made a beeline for the door… then screeched to a halt when he realized his mistake. He coughed a few more times and went back to the couch. "Oh… I just remembered my legs hurt…"

He pulled out a large chocolate bar from underneath the couch. It was there for emergencies, and being confined to the couch certainly constituted an emergency in his book. He licked his lips and began to peel away the wrapper.

"Sorry, Babar." His mother took the chocolate bar away from him. "But you can't be eating like that if you're sick. I'll go make you some oatmeal."

Babar sighed as she went to the kitchen. "Could be worse…"

A few minutes later, his father returned. "Here, Babar." He gave his son a small box. "This should make you feel better."

"A present? For me?" Babar asked in excitement, eyeing the box.

"Well, not exactly. It's your medicine."

"Oh… thanks, dad," Babar said, disappointed. So far, Operation Get out of Chores was off to a horrendous start, but hopefully, it would end up outweighing having to tend to a sick baby without a moment's rest.

While Star ran out of the living room with a platter of glasses of apple juice, Andy wheeled in a tray of glasses of orange juice, presenting them to Babar.

"Orange juice? I've changed my mind. I think I'd like… apple juice," Babar decided.

"But that's what you said before!" Andy objected. But his older brother coughed again to reinforce his point. Andy sighed, and left to fulfill Babar's request.

"Uh, when you see Star, tell her to bring more cookies?" Babar called after him.

Andy did see Star rather quickly, because the two of them ended up colliding with each other, causing the juice to spill all over the floor.

"Andy! Star! What a mess!" Babar scolded them, earning him a death glare from them both.

Things weren't going very well in the kitchen either, what with the extra work and fewer ponies to do it. "Uh, mom? I think I put pudding in the baby bottles…" Miles admitted.

His mother sighed. "That's alright, dear…"

Dripping with rainwater, Ruby and her father entered the house, each carrying stacks of papers and magazines from the store. They carried them into the living room, placing them down.

"Here's your comic book," his father said, handing Babar the comic.

Babar looked at the cover. "Thanks, but this is from last week," Babar said. "Could you go back to the store?"

"Back to the store?!"

"Please, Dad? I just have to have the new issue!"

Just then, their father sniffed. "What's that? Smoke?"

"Oh, no! My dinner!" Their mother went running into the kitchen to deal with the problem. While the others followed her, Babar was left on the couch.

Things were rather boring for Babar for the rest of that day. Having dinner brought to him on a tray was a luxury, sure, but he grew tired of watching TV and reading his comic book.

Eventually, it was time for bed. For Babar, this entailed staying right where he was, since he already had a pillow and blanket with him on the couch.

His siblings, however, had other plans upstairs. Ruby was going to her room when she heard a "pssst" from Miles' bedroom.

"Get Andy and Star," Miles instructed.

Ruby opened their respective bedroom doors, ushering for them to come out, and the three of them then entered Miles' bedroom.

"What's up?" Ruby asked.

"Did any of you notice that Babar seems rather… sprightly, for someone who's supposedly sick?" Miles asked them. "He heard the jingle of the ice cream truck and jumped out of his bed for a short time."

"Babar makes us get cookies!" Star exclaimed. "He shouldn't be able to eat as much if he's sick!"

"Are you saying he's not really sick?!" Ruby looked furious. "That good-for-nothing glutton! Making us do extra work while he sits there!"

"I'm saying it's a possibility," Miles clarified. "But I think we might be able to catch him out. Trick him into blowing his cover. You guys with me?"

Eager to get out of their extra chores and see Babar receive his due punishment, Ruby, Andy, and Star all voiced their approval of their eldest brother's plan, and the four siblings placed their hooves forward in a circle.

The next morning, Babar was still on the couch. When he heard hoofsteps approaching the living room, he shut his eyes and let his tongue hang out.

"Morning, squirt," Miles said, entering. He shook a box. Babar opened his eyes to see Miles holding a rather large box of chocolate chip cookies. He then watched as Miles did something most peculiar… he taped the box to the ceiling, with the label facing Babar.

"What are you doing?" Babar asked.

"Just putting these here for safekeeping," Miles explained. "Don't get eating any, though. You're too sick to have many."

Babar watched as Miles left the room. Babar then looked up at the ceiling, where the box of cookies taunted him. Inviting him to tear the box down from its prison and snarf down every last cookie. Beads of sweat materialized on Babar's forehead the longer he looked up.

Maybe, just maybe, he could get away with it…

No. He couldn't risk it. Someone could walk in at any moment.

After Babar had been suffering on the couch for the longest fifteen minutes of his life, doing his best (which was not very much) to ignore the cookies, Ruby entered the room, with a special guest following her. "Hi, Babar," Rhapsody greeted.

"Rhapsody?" Babar looked confused. "What's going on?"

"Well, since you're stuck in bed, I had your friend Rhapsody come over to provide you with some entertainment," Ruby explained, smiling. She turned on a boombox, and a funky song began to play as she left.

"Boom boom, acka-lacka lacka boom… Boom boom, acka-lacka lacka boom…" Rhapsody began, continuing to repeat the phrase until the lyrics changed.

"It was a night like this forty million years ago! I lit a cigarette, picked up a monkey skull to go!" Rhapsody was now dancing accurately to how it had been done in the music video for the song.

With a singing voice as amazing as Rhapsody's, Babar was thoroughly captivated by the performance. It wasn't long before it was time for the chorus.

"Open the door, get on the floor! Everybody walk the dinosaur!" Rhapsody sang, dancing bombastically.

Babar shut his eyes. It was taking him physical restraint not to join in the dance. 'Just don't look at it and you'll be alright…'

But alas, Babar just couldn't keep his eyes shut, knowing the performance that was taking place. 'Okay, maybe just a peek.' He opened his eyes… only to discover that he was somehow already off the couch and dancing alongside Rhapsody. "Oops."

He then noticed his parents and siblings standing there, in front of the doorway.

"I… I can explain," Babar began. "...Okay, fine! I'm not really sick! You got me!"

His mother and father looked at each other, then back at their son. "But you're not sick! That's good news!" his father said happily.

"Honey, no," his mother said, holding up a hoof. She looked sternly at Babar. "We're very disappointed in you, Babar." Deciding that the music still playing was too distracting, she turned off the boombox.

"Well… since I'm not sick, can I have my chocolate back?" Babar asked.

"You can have it back once Maple's better—and you've been grounded for a week," his mother told him. She held Maple out. "Now go and give her some medicine."

Babar groaned as he took the baby, then left.

"Well, thanks for all your help, Rhapsody!" Miles thanked Babar's friend.

"Ahem." Rhapsody held out his hoof. "Exposure doesn't pay the bills, you know."

"Oh, right." Miles placed several jangles in Rhapsody's hoof.