Twilight Sparkle and the Stupid Original Pony

“Just from watching you dance?” Isha asked, voice full of amazement. Tinged with loss.

She had slept till noon after her restless night bedeviled by my daughter. Discord was still asleep on a sofa, and I had whispered my account of the previous evening to Isha as we sipped tea in the kitchen.

“Sploogie!” I said, “all over the place, but not in me.”

“Then my night’s rest was well sacrificed keeping Gloamzilla from interrupting you.”

Isha’s smile held wistfulness and I was shamed to cause her sorrow.

“Sorry to brag about it, all things considered.”

I might have been dancing for Isha, if Twilight had not finally come back to me.

“Don’t be. It’s a tale well worth telling, I will add it to my lore of the one that got away.”

“And then this morning after I took Gloam to school and you guys were still sleeping—”

“Oh, no, there’s more?”

“Twilight found my drawer of toys and dug out my largest anal beads.”

“Those huge red ones you bought as a joke?”

“Yep. All the way in. I got butt rammed while I jilled off in the shower until I passed out.”

“Thank you for not waking us up with your caterwauling.”

“Twenty centimetres,” I said, forming a ring with finger and thumb and sliding it forward and back in front of my mouth, “of pony dick shaped dildo. All the way in.”

“That’d keep even you quiet.”

She finished her tea.

“I’m going to go make sure Garny and his people are ready to ship out to Gallop in four days.”

A day, maybe two, after that, and Twilight should be able to take Gloam and Discord and me home.

“Remind them to keep it under their collective hats. We don’t need any official attention. I don’t want to leave you in the hotseat.”

“Can I just…” she trailed off without finishing her question.

“Just what?”

“Nevermind. I better go check on the refugees.”

As she laced her boots the door opened to admit Twilight and Gloam.

“I envy you, pony,” Isha said and focused on the footwear.

“Discord!” shouted Gloam as she took a running jump and cannonballed onto the sofa and its occupant.

“What was that about?” Twilight asked, “were you bragging to Isha?”

“I had to, it was too epic not to tell somepony. Gloam, stop climbing on our guest. I know I didn’t specifically mention parkour, but that’s another no-no. He’s actually an important fellow back home in Equestria.”

“I would devour you, little human filly,” Discord grumped to Gloam as he stood, “if your parents were not two of my favorite ponies.”

He had grabbed an ankle and now held her suspended, at arm’s length. In theory he’d be safe at that distance.

“Forgive my foal, O Lord Discord,” I said respectfully, “if she is weak in the paying of respect consider that she is strong of chaos. Kaos runs deep in her mother’s blood.”

“Tanna, dear,” he said as I rose from my knees, “if you think I’d really eat a potential future foalsitter, you underestimate my intelligence.”

“Besides,” Gloam sassed as she thrashed in mid air, “who’s says it would be me who got et?”

Ignoring her inverted skirt as she hung head down, Gloam gnashed her teeth and lunged at Discord. Discord growled back at her.

“Rrrrrrrr!” and, “Grrrrrrr!” they contended.

“Didn’t you say, Tanna, that you have met Lady Eris?” He was trying, without success, to stare Gloam down.

Suddenly she swung her free foot and kicked the hand grasping her ankle. He dropped her in surprise and she hit the floor on all fours like a panther before making her escape.

“I did meet her, she blessed me when I was a child.”

“No wonder your offspring is so interesting.”

“You should have been there when my mother caught me giving burnt offering before the statue of Eris.”

—

“You see, my lady? I don’t know how long this has been going on. There are rumors in the servants’ quarters.”

Two women peered around the corner.

A twelve year old boy knelt, naked, before the marble goddess. A garland of fresh flowers hung around the statue’s neck and a small brazier flamed at her feet. With his hands above his head he whispered fervently.

“Hail Eris!”

Had the goddess of chaos always worn such an enigmatically victorious smirk?

“Hail Eris!” he repeated.

If marble could live and breath, one might swear Eris had winked at the watchers.

“Hail Eris!”

The offering was reduced to smoldering ashes, the flickering flames, extinct. But still a golden light lingered, divine, around chaos’s devotee.

“What did he give her?”

“A watercolour painting of Themis, my lady. He won first prize for it.”

The mother’s eyes narrowed.

Typically any reminder of her son’s existence filled the mistress with rage but this reaction—

“This didn’t happen.” Lady Akos’s voice was barely audible. “And if I so much as hear his name again I may throw the locutor thereof out a window.”

Defenestration from this altitude would result in a crater – the intensity of her ladyship’s reaction reminded the younger woman of an emotion much closer to a servant’s experience.

Fear.

—

“I don’t know how she found out, or how much she saw, but she didn’t speak to me for a year after that.”

“Why did you have a statue of Eris in your home?” Isha asked – she had paused by the door to hear the tale.

“Oh, we had the whole damn pantheon around the bath. Eris was in a dead end in the maze by the frigidarium.”

“How big was the bath?” she asked, tallying Greek gods in her head.

“It took a whole floor of Primary Housing.”

“Whoa. And you picked Lady Discordia out of that bunch?”

“Eris,” I said, bowing my head humbly, “chose me.”

“Did your mother neglect you because of chaos?” Discord asked, perplexed by human ways.

“My mother neglected and abused me because of who and what I was. But she refused to talk to me because she was terrified of who I served.”

—

With Isha out of the domicile and Twilight attempting to coach our daughter on proper Equestrian manners for the child of royalty, Discard and I were left alone with a firm injunction not to destroy the universes.

I worked on drawing a circle and various geometric divisions thereof while Discord took care of the runes.

Destruction? Not so much. But we’d have our fun and the world would know our will of chaos!

Striving not to giggle, we chanted the spell together. With both of us working in harmony the radius of effect would grow exponentially.

As soon as the magic circle was consumed by our casting, Discord and I scampered back to the kitchen to resume our harmless conversation.

“…and if you give an extra twist when you purl,” I said as Twilight and Gloam returned, “you can make the cabling more pronounced.”

“I see, I see,” Discord agreed, sagely.

“Yeah… right…” Gloam observed sagely, imitating him. “Dad, are you buying that?”

“It could be legit,” my truelove said tentatively.

“Mom can’t knit,” Gloam ratted me out.

“Shh, dear, with any luck we’ll never know what they’ve been up to.”

At least not until bed time, they wouldn’t!

—

Isha returned from her meeting while I was cooking.

“No further conflicts but Garny is afraid they’re being watched.”

“Crap. We’ll be doing the civic a favour, getting squatters out of their hair.”

“You know they won’t see it that way.”

“Nope.”

“Garny’ll send them here in small groups to minimize attention.”

“Perfect. We’ll get them safe and Twilight should be almost ready to get the rest of us Equestrians back home.”

—

“Goodnight, Gloamie. Let our guests sleep tonight.”

“Yes, mother,” she grumped and then brightened to add, “I love you!”

“Love you, mon enfant.” I turned to hug Isha. “We’ll tone things down tonight, if Gloam doesn’t behave give my door a good thump and I’ll come out and remind her.”

I hurried to join Twilight in my bedroom, fully planning to scale back the lust apocalypse.

—

Good intentions didn’t get me very far when I saw Twilight’s naked body, her cock, the rod of my desiring, already fully erect.

“What I really need right now,” I told Twilight as I knelt before her, “is your balls slapping on my chin!”

“I can arrange for that! Take it all, cocksucker,” she said as I did. Gently resting her hands on the back of my head she let me drive; she could have grabbed my ears and face-fucked me mercilessly and I would have been fine. “Ah, yeah, I could get used to this.”

So could I, I thought as I timed my breathing to our rhythm, the intimate pulse of the universe…

cock in, cock out, breath in

cock in, cock out, breath out

cock in, cock out, breath in

cock in, cock out, breath out

So maybe we weren’t exactly scaling back, but at least we were keeping quiet. For now.

I pulled my head back and kissed the tip of her penis.

“If we keep our current gender configuration when we return to Equestria, I swear I will suck your dick every night for the next hundred years. The ponies will learn to love you as their mighty Prince of Friendship. And for me alone you will wield your scepter of our very special friendship.”

“Tempting, Tanna, do you mean it?”

I was already back on her cock, the head too far back in my mouth for me to even attempt any vocalization.

Instead I put the ‘yes’ in my eyes, begging her to come for me, begging her to fuck my mouth for the next century, pouring my lust and hunger into my gaze.

“Oh! That look! That look,” she groaned loudly “I’m gonna—”

Twilight slipped one hand down to caress my throat, used the other hand to brush my hair back so she could stare into my eyes as she climaxed.

My lips in a sultry pout around the thickness of her erection, my eyes were burning beacons of desire, I gulped her semen as she ejaculated, the volume incredible as a result of the edging earlier in the day. She gushed onto my tongue where I could taste her most, where I could feel the heat of her seed. A drop escaped to trickle down my chin, but I didn’t waste much.

“I could feel you swallowing,” she commented as her touch slid up my neck to my face.

She wiped the cum off my chin and I suckled it from her fingers.

“Every drop,” I smiled. “It’s my turn, if you are so inclined my prince.”

“Very inclined. How do you want it?”

“Slow. Unless you get hard again.”

“And when I do get hard again?”

I grinned impishly.

“I want you to bucking wreck me.”

Twilight put her hand on my thigh.

“I said to go slow…”

She kissed my knee.

“Slower.”

Twilight moved to the end of the bed and kissed my foot. I smiled my approval as she began to kiss each of my toes.

“Slowly, you say, my bride?” she chuckled, pausing between toes, “This night you will beg me to hurry before I finish you.”

“Tell me about the colours of magic.”

“Mmm? That’s kinda unicorn stuff. We don’t really talk about it to other tribes.”

“I am a trained, experienced, esoteric librarian. Who better to help you research?”

“Good point,” she murmured, cheek against my anklebone.

“So I need to understand Equestrian magic so I can serve you better.”

“Well…” She lingered on my calf, and I would need to remember to wear socks which would cover the hickey “…honestly the colour doesn’t matter nearly as much as what school of magic you studied. I, of course, have studied almost everything. And then some.”

Her kisses had reached my knees, her fingertips lightly teasing my upper body. If she thought this pace would reduce me to begging, she was wrong. I could lie back and enjoy her gentle touch until dawn.

“Can any colour of magic cast spells from any school?”

“Mostly, yes. There are spells that favor certain colours, or don’t work well with others. Relatively few spells simply do not work with a specific chroma.” She nipped playfully just above my kneecap. “And there are certain spells that certain casters just cannot use. It’s not well understood.”

“Is that something you’ve studied?”

“Not really. I can cast almost anything, unless I’m not strong enough.”

Another small eternity came and went and Twilight was halfway up my thighs. My victory seemed somewhat less sure.

“Give me an example?”

I bit my lip, lest my questions became the begging she had foretold. I needed it so badly. She was winning, and she knew it, her certainty was a palpable glow, melting my resistance.

“Teleportation is the obvious one. Very few unicorns can do it and, frankly, it isn’t taught in school. Mess up a teleport and you can do some real harm.”

It had taken a lifetime for her to bathe every centimeter of my legs with her kisses but she was almost to my hip, hopefully soon to be heading centreward.

I won’t beg, I won’t beg. Even losing would be a victory of a sort. I won’t beg.

“What about—” I tried to formulate another question but my thoughts were trapped in honeyed desire and Twilight interrupted.

“Of course, there are spells that I know, that nopony else knows about.”

Barely touching me, Twilight put her mouth up to my pubic hair and blew her warm breath against my labia as she whispered a word that I couldn’t make out; only the slightest hint of her gentle heat crept into my yearning cleft. My body understood, even if I could not. It felt like everything below my navel melted as I grew wetter than I would have thought was possible. As the excess of moisture flowing from my need began to tickle its way between my ass cheeks, she pulled away and it was too much for me to endure any longer. With the merest hint of volition I opened a telepathic channel to Twilight, a wordless flood of desire and love. Twilight gasped with the intensity of my sending. No longer teasing she lowered her mouth, found my clitoris with her tongue, slipped two fingers into the humid heat of my longing.

My mind was devastated with pleasure. Twilight’s tongue rasped across my clit, her fingers probed deep inside me, the knuckle of the other fingers ground hard against my perineum on every insertion. I shrieked then as my climax began.

The telepathic link was still open and I shared my cataclysmic orgasm with my lover. Nameless instinct told me to avoid drawing from strange sources of magic while we were connected but the spell of my flesh was enough to drown mere thought and words in pleasure. My sending to Twilight was merely the mundane magic of a woman being brought to the crumbling edge of sanity by the one she loved.

Distantly I could feel what my sensations were doing to Twilight as they flooded to her over our connection. Her hips bucking against the bed, she was headed for another climax and I wanted it to take place inside my body. I couldn’t find words but the tactile imperative of need I sent her was sufficient to send her scrambling to bring her cock to me.

Roughly she grabbed my hips and flipped me over onto my stomach. She straddled my legs and spread my buttocks as my sense of alarm rose. Despite our playtime in the shower this morning, my ass was not ready for the degree of vigor her urgency promised; I didn’t need to touch her dick to know how hard it was, proprioceptive nerve impulses were leaking back over our link and I knew that she was almost painfully erect.

“Wait, Twi!” I started to say, but my voice was muffled when she pushed me face down onto the bed.

There was a moment of delirious terror. Without lubrication her cock was going to agonize my anus and there was nothing I could do about it. Twilight was too lost in the lust I had triggered to be stopped.

After all, she had a Pinkie Promise to fulfill, and she had promised to fill me.

Twilight gave a guttural roar and with a mighty thrust of her hips she plunged her rigid cock fiercely inside me.

Alarm turned into another level of pleasure as she entered me, filling my dripping pussy with her hardness. She hadn’t been aiming for my asshole at all!

“Listen,” she said.

I turned my head so I could breath.

“Ahhhnn?” I said. “You like this?”

Reaching behind me, I dug my fingers into the smooth flesh of my ass and upper thigh and spread myself wider so that Twilight could better watch herself entering me.

“One of the most important milestones of a unicorn foal’s first few years is when they find out what colour their magic is. It doesn’t really matter that much for most ponies, but everypony wants to know.”

She must have liked the view between my spread cheeks. She paused to admire the sight of her thickness stretching its way between my soaked labia – and then she was back at it, her energy increasing until she had to grab my hips to hold us together.

“Twilight?”

“Nnn?”

Still leaning head down on the pillow I asked, “do we do this too much?”

“Getting bored with it?”

“No!”

“Then don’t just lie there, it’s time to move your plot.”

I let go of my ass and raised myself up so I was supported on my knees and elbows. With every thrust she pushed me forward, but now I could push back, and did so, driving her into me, deep and hard.

“It’s almost unheard of, but super powerful unicorns, their magic colour will shift.”

Her hands moved from my hips to breasts, first cupping and squeezing, then finding nipples to tease.

“When I was a little filly, I had red magic at first.”

I moaned happily as we slammed together, over and over; the bed frame I had built imagining to endure the rut of ponies creaked with abuse.

“Before it turned pink.”

“Rose,” I said. “Your magic is a beautiful rose colour.”

Twilight’s climax was immanent and she grabbed my hair, pulling my head back.

“I love you too, you romantic dork.”

Her other hand was still on my breast and the tweaking of a nipple was just enough paint to perfectly season the overload of pleasure flooding my senses; I screamed her name. In a series of ferocious thrusts Twilight ejaculated her second load into me. For as long as her erection lasted afterwards she, continued to ride me in slow, luxurious, afterplay. I was too wobbly to push back, merely trying not to fall over as humped my tired, quivering body. Finally she popped out. After trying in vain to stick it back in, she collapsed to the side, limp of cock – and the rest of her body too.

I was bone tired from the apotheosis of pleasure, demolished by a rough ride through ecstasy, but there was one thing I had to say.

“I didn’t beg,” I gasped, my breath ragged, my lids drooping.

“No, my bride,” Twilight was breathless too, “you didn’t beg, you commanded!”

“Forgive me.”

But she was already out cold, and with her next breath she was snoring.

I closed my eyes, ready to finally sink into the dark velvet depths of well earned oblivion.

The alarmer began screeching to wake the dead.

It was morning.

—

“Did you even sleep last night? Whatever you two were doing was not toning it down.” Isha’s voice was a complex of concern and mild disapproval and suppressed longing.

“Something’s wrong with this… pan?” I said slowly.

I’d cooked eggs in the same pan for years – but for the first time I noticed that the handle was all wrong, the bottom curved upward instead of down.

Isha turned the pan over and guided me to a chair at the table.

“I got this,” she said, “it’s a wonder you can even stand.”

—

I must have fallen asleep with my head on the table. When I woke, Gloam had already finished her breakfast and Twilight was shambling into the kitchen.

“Is peanut butter toothpaste a human thing?” she asked groggily.

“I’m pretty sure it’s a Tanna and Discord thing,” Isha suggested. “It was mint, just yesterday morning.”

Gloam had returned from her post-breakfast tooth care and was grinning.

“Right. I’ll get some proper toothpaste when I pick Gloam up from school.”

“Dad! No!” Gloam’s eyes were wide with alarm. “This is the best thing that ever happened to me!”