“Who sent you here?” Twilight demanded tartly. “Cadance? Our mother?”

“Ma didn’t tell me anything – when I asked her, she said you didn’t even tell her that you were seeing anypony. I sent myself here. To try to offer you some brotherly relationship advice.”

“And tell me,” she said, suddenly sweet, “why it is that you’ve never attempted to offer your wise guidance before?”

“Well, you never seemed to need it.”

“Shining. I am twenty six years old. The reason I didn’t need relationship advice, the reason I never dated anypony, is because something was medically wrong with me. I took care of the issue and that’s when I met Tangent.”

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, no lasting damage, I’m assured. And that’s all I’m saying about it.”

Shining Armor was married to the Princess of Sex. He had heard enough about ‘female troubles’ that he was not going to press his sister for details.

“What kind of name is ‘Tangent’?” he asked instead.

“I assume it’s not that unusual – for a human.”

“You’re dating a human?”

“Welllllll, I did turn him into a pony. I am kinda one of the most powerful things going, you know.”

“I want to meet him before, erm before things get—”

“Before what, BBBFF?”

“Before things get, er, physical.”

Shining Armor was looking down in embarrassment.

“Oh, Shining.” Twilight shook her head. “My dear, darling, sweet, big brother. You are a day late and a dollop short. Technically, several weeks late.”

“Late?”

“Your little sister has done the grown-up thing. Many times. Now pick your jaw up off the floor and stop worrying. I’m fine. I’m an adult. It’s perfectly natural.”

“He’s not taking advantage of you?”

“No, if anything I took advantage of him.”

“What‽”

“I might have been a little forward when we first met. I think we worked through it.”

“I guess that sounds more like my Twilly. I still want to meet him.”

“You’ll have to wait. Celestia banished him back to his homeworld. (I wonder if she remembered to turn him human again!) I’m still working on the breaking barrier spell she put up to keep me from just grabbing him right back.”

“That doesn’t speak very highly to his character.”

“Psht. She’s got her tail in a knot about some vague prophesy she half remembers from when she was a foal, back in the year one hundred B.D.”

“B.D.?”

“Before Dirt.”

“What’s the prophesy? This could be serious.”

“Her Highness is wrong.”

“Now Twilly, you can’t talk like that about—”

“Who has been saving Equestria over and over since she was a preteen?”

“Uh, you.”

“Who beat Tirek in spite of having her magic stolen?”

“You did.”

“Nightmare moon, Plunderseed vine, the new hive?”

“You. You. You.”

“Who was right about fake Cadance at your wedding?”

“Ouch. You were right.”

“I don’t blame you, you were ensorcelled. But her Highness should have trusted me. She practically raised me, she should know that I am not going to make that kind of mistake. My reverence for Celestia is still complete and absolute, even when she is wrong, but I am not going to let her ruin this for me. If I have to, I will leave Equestria to stay with him.”

“You’re that serious?”

“I am.”

“Is he?”

“Yes. He’d probably do something stupid and noble like offer to ‘let me go’ rather than pull me away from Equestria, but he’s not getting away that easy!”

“Sounds like you landed as big a dork as yourself. What’s he like?”

“He’s nice. Maybe a little dumb, but he was really excited to come to Equestria. His world runs on a buncha technology bullshit instead of real magic.”

“Dumb? Aren’t you going to get bored of being with a dumb stallion?”

“Maybe not dumb, I guess he’s just more of a dork.”

“Like who is it that we know, who is a dork? Remind me?”

“Ha ha ha ha, I guess it takes one to not know one! There’s one thing I notice you didn’t ask about him.”

“I don’t want to know how big his—”

“No! I mean, you didn’t ask what tribe he is.”

“Does it matter? I’m not stuck up about being a unicorn. I can’t lead the troops into battle if I don’t respect all ponies regardless of tribe.”

“You’re a good pony, Shining.”

“Anyway, Twily, I am going to take your word and assume you are totally correct about him. Please, please, don’t run away from Equestria without saying goodbye, okay? Preferably not at all. I love you, Sis.”

“I love you too, big Brother, and thank you for believing in me. Trust me, I’m really not a complete idiot. So are you going to help me bust the spell?”

“Aw, c’mon. You know I’m not a magic genius like you. I create shields and fields and barriers, I try to keep others from breaking them. I don’t have any hooves-on experience trying to break them myself.”

“Tell me. What’s it like when one of your shield spells is overcome?”

“It’s like I’m pushing all that magic out to hold the spell together and then suddenly there’s nothing to push against. Almost like falling over. Of course I can’t get very analytical about it because usually it means we’re in danger.”

“How do you keep them from breaking?”

“Okay, see, they have a strong side and a weak side. It’s easier to form them for keeping stuff out, than keeping it in. If the strong side is the outside, pushing on it actually makes it stronger before it breaks and the pony casting it can focus his power to reinforce the one spot. Trying to contain, the only way to make it stronger is to pour power into the whole shield.”

“Explain that.”

“Okay, imagine if you’re inside a force bubble and I’m trying to keep you in. If you attack the field, and I try to reinforce the spot you are attacking, your attack will flow away from the strong spot and eat away at the shield elsewhere. So I have to strengthen the whole thing or it will automatically shunt your attack to the weakest point. It doesn’t really make sense, but that’s how it works."

“I think I understand, thank you, that will help me. On the rare occasion I need shield spells I just pour on so much power I can usually get away with not knowing what I’m doing.”

“Tell me about it, Sis, I’ve seen you throw around more magic than I’ll use in my life into one spell like it was nuthin. I bet you could juggle both sun and moon duty.”

“Ugh, that might be easy for Princess Celestia, but not me until I’m a few centuries older and more experienced. And unfortunately I’m probably stuck on the ‘hard to break’ side of this spell, so I will be doing this the hard way. But it’s good to know that she can’t easily reinforce against me without using a huge amount of magic.”

“What if you can’t break it?”

“Ask me that in a hundred years.”

“I probably won’t be around in a hundred years, Sis. What changes then?”

“That’s about as long as I can expect him to live. If I’m not back with him by then, it’s too late.”

“You’ll do it. If you were in the habit of being wrong, we’d all be dead by now.”

“Thank you, I appreciate your vote of confidence.”

“Imma tell Cady—”

“Ah-ha! So it was Cadance who sent you!”

“No.”

“No?”

“She told me to try to get you to break it off with this colt-friend—”

“Lover.”

“—of yours. You will note that I did not say anything of the sort.”

“No,” Twilight agreed, “you did not. Point in your favor.”

“I just wanted to meet him and make sure you’re okay. Don’t worry, Brother’s got your six. But I would also like to point out that Brother will probably be sleeping on the sofa when he reports back that he disobeyed Princess Cadanza.”

“Do you want me to cover for you? I could write Cady a passive aggressive little note chastising her for trying to use you to interfere with my sex life.”

“Nah, I can take my punishment, I’m a big pony. If you’re gonna do this thing, you need to focus on doing this thing, not playing my wife’s games. She can go choreograph somepony else’s sister’s defloration.”

“Eww. I better get back to work, I just lost two days of lab time in the Ponyville lockup.”

Shining wasn’t going to ask about that, either.

“I don’t even know what school of magic Celestia used in her portal spell. I didn’t recognize any of the words.”

“I’ll show myself out.”

“Not without a hug first, BBBFF.”

“Aw, you know I’ll never say no to hugs, li’l Sis.”

“Thanks for your help understanding shield spells,” she said as they embraced, “now let me give you some ‘brother advice’.

“What’s that, Twily?”

“Keep your damn muzzle out of my feedbag.” She grinned saucily. “I got this.”

Author's Note

Hey, everypony! Happy Equinox! I realize I lost a lot of you in the early chapters; such is life. But now things look like they are going better for T&T. If there are any of you left, do you have any feedback before anything bad happens? For example, it’s obvious many of you hate this. Again, that is oki doki by Loki, but the important thing is, do you hate it for the right reasons? Or, if anypony who has been so kind as to express any positivity could drop a word or two regarding why? This not a demand, just saying it could be groovy.