I Am Alone

A year had passed during my second life, and I had grown into a young adolescent girl pegasus pony. After experiencing going into heat for the first time this was my only assumption. That week will forever be humiliating to my dignity as a man. I locked myself away in the cave I'd grown to call home. Apart from that one setback, the past year has given me an abundance of time to adapt to my quadruped form and accept my gender.

At times it baffled me how fastly I'd become accustomed to being the opposite gender. I wasn't one of those transgendered people. I didn't even believe in gender fluidity, I found it stupid. Sure I had a few crossdressing fetishes I wasn't able to try out, but was still a straight guy. Thinking too much on the subject gave me a headache.

I had also become the surrogate child of the Chimera-like monster who had taken me in when I had nowhere else to go. I guess she found my false bravado amusing. Whatever the reason, I had begun to mentally refer to her as 'Mama', not out loud though. That'd be too cringy, plus I still couldn't make much sounds.

Mama showed me how to control my wings, I still didn't know how to fly. But at least they didn't drag on the ground anymore. She'd even keep me warm on many cold winter nights.

After the first three months of silence I started to relearn how to speak alone. I would attempt sounding out the alphabet as best as I could. Some single sounds and syllables were manageable, but hard syllables were… for lack of a better word, hard. It's not like I could ask Mama for help, she didn't speak.

I did pick up some differing growls and their related meanings from her though. One time I wandered to the forest's edge and saw other ponies, they were brightly coloured, unlike me. They spoke with each other and laughed. My spying was interrupted by Mama, who let out a low growl. My ears folded back, I took the scolding. But Mama wasn't rousing on me, she was warning me of the ponies. I suppose a little monochromatic carnivore Pegasus would scare the nice ponies. Back to our cave we went and all thoughts of interacting with the ponies disappeared from my mind.

I had witnessed how they treated outsiders, in particular, one zebra shaman. Bunch of racists, everyone emptied the streets whenever she went to town for supplies. The zebra shaman was nice. Mama took me to her one time when I was sick and delirious with fever. She was the only other pony Mama trusted.

Mama taught me to hunt too. The key is keeping low to the ground and waiting, lots of waiting. Nothing was now more satisfying than ripping into the throat of an unsuspecting rabbit or other small creature. There's no way I would have done this before… Mama found me, no that's not right. Before, when I was human. This has been happening more frequently. I was starting to forget myself.

Using a grounding technique I came up with, I started recalling things I did as a human. Random bits of pop culture knowledge and other trivia.

My bad habits and vices suddenly didn't matter to me. I hadn't the urge to drink or smoke, withdrawal symptoms weren't even a thing at all.

I was still very dependent on Mama. She gave me everything I needed. She even comforted me after I had nightmares, which were becoming more frequent. I had to protect Mama.

Unfortunately I never got the chance.

The Long Night ruined everything. I had noted that days and nights were the same as Earth, twelve hours light and twelve hours of dark. On this day, or night as it was, the dark lasted for longer. Thirteen hours had passed and still no sun.

Something was wrong. Very wrong. I had to investigate. I looked over at Mama, still asleep within our cave home. Steeling my resolve I exited the cave. Heading to the only place I could think of that would have the answers, the pony village.

It took nearly half an hour to reach the forest's edge. Peering through the foliage I noticed the ponies were having a celebration of some kind. From what I could see from this far away, the ponies also shared expressions of confusion or fear.

So they weren't responsible for this then. It was someone else. Maybe it was magic. I mentally gagged at the very thought.

Turning my attention back to the ponies, I noticed something that wasn't there before. A near-black giant pony had appeared. I couldn't quite make out her full appearance, but it looked like she had both wings and a horn. That didn't seem fair, having both.

Someone screaming "Nightmare Moon!" In the crowd taught me her name.

She was saying something now, I strained to hear it but I caught the last bit she shouted "Remember this day, little ponies, for it was your last. From this moment forth, the night will last forever!"

In a flash, she had dissipated into a purplish blue starry cloud. I panicked as I noticed the cloud coming straight for me and ducked my head. Hiding in the safety of the trees.

Slightly surprised, the cloud form of Nightmare Moon flew right past me. Not even a second glance was shot my way. I followed the cloud's trail with my eyes.

Home was that way. Mama would be there.

I froze as fear crept up on me. I had to protect Mama. Running off in the direction of the cloud I hoped I was not too late. I don't know what this Nightmare Moon would do, but she definitely seemed malevolent.

My little legs screamed at me in protest, cardio was never a strength of mine. I ignored the feeling and pressed on. I'd never run so far so fast in either life.

Mama found me when I first appeared, when I was still ready to give up. Mama gave me food and shelter. She taught me to be wary of outsiders and how to hunt. I had to try to repay all that.

While still being a child in appearance, I refuse to be helpless.

The mouth of our cave was visible. I could hear a commotion coming from inside. Mama was definitely in trouble.

Something bubbled up from deep within me. I screamed, "Mama!"

Saying anything cohesive for the first time in over a year and it was that. I ignored the voice in my head telling me it was cringe. That wasn't important now. Mama needed me.

I skidded to a halt at the entrance. Mama was fighting the cloud. The cloud was winning. Leaping into action I pounced on the clouded form of Nightmare Moon. Unsurprisingly I passed right through and hit the wall behind her. I probably sprained my wing after landing on it awkwardly.

Nightmare Moon resumed her natural form and stared at me with a hint of amusement.

"How quaint," she mocked, "a child."

Don't look down on me bitch I'll bite your fucking face off, I swear to God. Assuming a low crouching attack position I growled at the towering mare. She remained unmoved.

The standoff was broken when Mama stepped in between us.

I guess Nightmare Moon took the show of defiance as deeply offensive. She turned back into a cloud and went straight for Mama. Swirling all around her trying to find a point of attack. Could it be the she was trying to possess Mama?

I couldn't let that happen.

"Mama," I reached out in concern for my surrogate parent.

However, that momentary distraction was all Nightmare Moon needed. Mama turned to me but it was too late, the Nightmare had a hold of her.

A Nightmare-possessed Mama stared at me with hungry eyes. Behind them was the real Mama, but I couldn't reach her.

A big front paw swiped towards me. I tried to duck and roll out of the way, but my sprained wing hindered my movements greatly.

I jumped back from Mama, despite the damage already being done. Blood trickled down the side of my face from a deep cut right below my left eye.

"W-w-why?" My speech was laboured and broken. Like my breathing.

Mama shook her head, seemingly fighting the Nightmare within. She roared at me to get away, to run as far as I could.

The Nightmare cloud seemed to congregate around her paw, the one that struck me.

I could see Mama's pleading eyes. I didn't want to leave her, but I had to. Sniffing some dumb child tears away, I ran.

I ran and ran. Away from the sound of fighting and deep within the forest.

Just like that, I was alone again.