Author's Note

DISCLAIMER: This story includes references to depression, depressing thoughts, insecurities, anxiety, self-harm, blood, depictions or references to sexual activity and thoughts based around all of these concepts. If you do not want to read a story with slight references to these, I would urge you to click off.

AN: Now you know why I couldn't wait to write the next chapter~ I hope everyone enjoys this shorter upload~ We only have a few more chapters before the end, so I can't wait to write those too! Stay special, everyone~!

Troubles Amid the Stars

Chapter XIX: Troubles Amid the Stars

Taking a deep breath, I stumble towards a table serving multiple drinks with a slight chuckle, grabbing a couple cups. Without hesitating, I pour punch into the two cups, taking a sip with a smile, looking towards the dancing people in front of me. The light of the day has all but disappeared, beautiful hues of blue and pink strewn across the sky. In a way, it’s beautiful. But not as beautiful as the woman in front of me, dancing to the upbeat music being played. Clearly, she’s enjoying herself a lot, even though today has already been filled with its fair share of strife. Rarity and Applejack even danced with each other for a bit before the two of them went to finish some chore. It must be difficult for Rarity. She’s dating the person who’s organized this whole event, so her girlfriend has to leave her side multiple times throughout the day just to make sure everything is going according to plan… It’s nice though. Finally being friends with them and being able to share our common experiences.

The only music Rainbow Dash dared to dance to is the upbeat music, avoiding romantic songs like the plague. Sometimes, I wonder if love is even in the cards for her, but then I remember that one confession she told me all those months ago. She did love someone… But she waited too long, prompting her to convince me to not waste my own chance. I almost did waste my chance with Sunset, but thankfully, she loved me too. I guess I just wonder who it was that Rainbow loved…

Fluttershy is an interesting case. After we hung out with Pinkie, she spent a lot of time on her phone, playing some game. She tried to hide what it was from me, but she didn't know I saw the game for a couple seconds. I’m not accustomed to mobile games, but from what Dash has told me, I could deduce that she was playing a dating simulator. I suppose that isn’t that surprising, considering the fact that she’s so shy that the thought of actually asking someone out probably terrifies her. The only thing that made me raise my eyebrow is that the guy she was trying to date was kind of disheveled and weird-looking. He had a white goatee and clothes that didn’t match each other at all. All I know is that he wasn’t attractive to me, but I suppose Fluttershy could like the character’s personality.

“Adagio?” a young voice catches me off guard, breaking me from my imagination. Looking to my left, I see Apple Bloom looking up at me, but her typically happy expression is now replaced with a solemn look as her eyes lock with my own.

“Hey, Apple Bloom~ How are you doing?” I ask her as kindly as I can, offering the second cup to her. I can always get another cup for Sunset, but the bigger problem for me is that expression on Apple Bloom’s face…

Without even looking at the cup, Apple Bloom’s frown increases, her eyes seemingly pained. “Where were you…?” she asks me quietly, clenching her fist slowly.

“What do you mean?” I ask her, turning my body towards the girl to give her my full attention. “I was here, dancing with Sunset. Is something wrong…?”

“Dancing…? But… you promised…” Her eyes look away from me and aim at the ground, a world of hurt displayed in her expression to my surprise. “You promised to help me with that scavenger hunt, Adagio… But you just decided to dance instead?” Her eyes look up at me with a sense of betrayal in them, instantly making me remember what she’s talking about. I… completely forgot. I was so caught up with Sunset lying to me and how I would fix that. It completely slipped my mind that I had promised to help Apple Bloom with her scavenger hunt. “I texted ya like five times and I waited for a good few hours…”

“I… I’m so sorry, Apple Bloom. I completely forgot. I promise, I-”

“No, I understand… Ya love Sunset and all. I guess she takes priority, huh?” Apple Bloom asks me with a hurt expression, a couple of tears sliding down her face. I didn’t mean to… Please don’t cry. “I just thought that a p-promise still meant something between friends and all.” Wiping the tears from her cheek, she looks out at the makeshift dance floor that is the dirt in front of the barn. “I came to try to find ya because maybe you got lost or something. But it doesn’t matter. Enjoy your time with Sunset, yeah?” Apple Bloom weakly states, her eyes still full of tears as she turns away from me.

“Apple Bloom? Wait, I really-” Grabbing her shoulder, Apple Bloom quickly brushes me off of her full on running into the dark orchard. “Come back!” I call out for her, quickly placing the cups back on the table before running in the direction Apple Bloom took off in. Running into the trees, I can instantly tell just how dark it is outside, making it increasingly difficult for me to tell what’s under my feet. Already, her normally bright hair is out of sight, making me look all around me. “Apple Bloom? Please don’t do this! I really am sorry!” I say loudly, trying to make my way deeper into the treeline, but no response comes my way. Damn it. Damn it. Damn it! Why, Adagio?! Why did you have to forget your promise to her? I probably could have had that one dance with Sunset and still made time for Apple Bloom, but I decided to keep dancing with her. I just shrugged off those text messages like they meant nothing. Why did I have to be so stupid?! I let my love blind me and hurt my first real friend in a long time… “Apple Bloom?” I call out for her one more time, my voice trailing off as my feet stop moving. Only the dark void of the trees presents itself in front of me, causing me to sigh heavily… If I had just checked my phone right after our first dance, this wouldn’t have happened…

Thumping my fist against the nearest tree, I can’t help but bring my hand to my face. Damn it… Of course I messed up again. This day is just full of mistakes, even if I try to avoid them. Every one I fix, a new problem arises. I really am sorry… I don’t know how I can make it up to you, Apple Bloom, but I promise I will. Somehow…

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The fire burns brightly, illuminating the night while giving us a bit of warmth. Pretty much all of the guests left after the hayride except for a couple of old ladies. Fortunately they stayed inside the house to talk to Applejack’s grandmother. I knew I had recognized her from somewhere. It turns out the first place I saw her was at the Hooves Homeless Shelter. That was… a long time ago. A time I would rather forget…

Sunset, her friends and I sit around the fire, only the crackling of the fire filling in the silence between everyone. This is the first time everyone has met since Valentine’s Day. Every other instance was more one-on-one with others, apparently. Even though everyone has technically made peace with each other, I suppose it’s still awkward for them due to the fight they had the last time everyone was in the same place. Not to mention that I’m here… Am I making it even more awkward…? “Well, I’d like to say thank you to everyone here,” Applejack says, breaking the silence before standing up. “It really means a lot that you all decided to come here and take up my offer~ Especially with what happened last time.” A frown comes to her face momentarily before she holds her glass of cider up in the air. “It’s been too long since we’ve all been together as friends, so I want to make a toast. To all my friends.” Her statement rings loud and clear, bringing a smile to Fluttershy’s face and making others surprised. “Even Adagio, who I’ve come to befriend over the past week.” She really didn’t have to mention me… It just makes me feel more called out. Regardless, the cowgirl takes a sip from her glass and smiles at me. “I’m happy to admit that I was wrong about you and I’m glad to call you a friend~”

“Here here~” Rarity chips in with a smile, raising her own glass. I never expected Rarity to like cider, but she does like wine, so I suppose it makes a little sense. Her hand gently grabs Applejack’s before standing up to look at everyone. “I would also like to add that I’ve… missed you girls. Despite how often I try to make myself seem independent and such, I do find myself longing for our older adventures, no matter where I am. Even if I’m lounging at work.”

“You can just say you missed us, you know~ You don’t have to be so dramatic,” Dash chuckles, interrupting the fashionista with a small laugh. Dash’s feet are kicked up on a stump in front of her log, taking a sip from a plastic cup.

“Um… I thought it was nice, Rarity~” Fluttershy states in her same quiet tone, giving the kindest smile she can before lifting her own cup momentarily.

“What has everyone been doing for the past few months?” Pinkie Pie chips in before Rarity can respond to Fluttershy’s words. “I’ve been working and visiting my family a lot~ Oh! Maud is coming here next month!” Pinkie Pie’s excited grin and expectant eyes makes me feel like everyone is supposed to have a reaction to that name, but I have no idea who this mystery person is.

“Oh yeah! But wasn’t Maud living with you instead of your family?” Applejack asks the pink woman with a confused expression, pushing her hat a little higher.

“She is! But Maud had to leave for something called an ‘expedition’ to find rocks or whatever.” Pinkie Pie briefly waves her hands in the air, trying to help her formulate the words to explain her situation. “When she told me about it, I was half-asleep, but I usually listen to her more closely!”

“Pinkie. I think what you mean is an ‘excavation.’ It’s the act of picking a site to excavate in the attempt to find items of importance. These are usually historical relics or bones of ancient creatures~” Twilight happily explains before a sheepish grin comes over her face, noticing herself rambling again. “J-just a fun fact and all.” Her gaze connects with mine before hanging her head, looking towards the grass under her feet.

“If you don’t mind me asking, who is Maud…?” I ask slowly, looking at the girls around the fire.

“Oh? You don’t know my sister, Maud?” Pinkie asks me excitedly, a big grin coming to her face. “She’s only the most awesomest and funnest person to ever be around! She’s the best sister I could ever ask for, besides Marble and Limestone of course~ Maud is super interested in rocks and she always makes great jokes about them!”

“Believe it or not, Maud is actually harder to understand than Pinkie and Rarity are,” Rainbow Dash interrupts the pink woman with a slight laugh. Is Maud also hyperactive like Pinkie…? I suppose that could be why she would be hard to understand… Even though I’ve already heard quite a bit about her, I still don’t know what Maud is like.

Rarity’s eyebrow raises slightly at Rainbow’s statement, crossing her arms slowly. “And what is that supposed to-”

“I do admit that Maud was a peculiar gal, but we were all able to understand her a little more after we got to know her,” Applejack interjects, a thoughtful look on her face.

“I remember one of the first times I met her was a few years ago~” Sunset says with a smile, looking up to the sky momentarily. “It was back when we were trying to defeat-” she suddenly stops herself before making eye contact with me, clearing her throat quickly. “I mean, um… We were having a sleepover at Pinkie’s and I got a snack in the middle of the night, but I got scared when I saw her after I closed the fridge door. Apparently, she said that Boulder was hungry.”

“Boulder does that a lot~” Pinkie tells us with a smile, taking a big gulp of her drink. “So does Gummy, my pet alligator!” Pinkie Pie has a pet alligator…? Why did I never know about this…? Now I’m even more grateful that I was able to make up with her today before she could get the idea of introducing me to ‘Gummy.’

Leaning in closer, Sunset kisses my cheek and grabs a hold of my hand, that same warm smile coming to her lips. “It’s not a real alligator, just so you know. It’s a stuffed animal she calls her pet,” Sunset whispers in my ear, apparently knowing my thoughts without me saying a word.

“I’m still wondering what dear Rainbow Dash meant by her previous statement,” Rarity speaks up, her arms still crossed as her gaze sends daggers into Dash’s head.

“I mean, wasn’t it kind of self-explanatory?” Dash asks as her eyes look around at the rest of us, searching for some sort of support for her argument. “You’re sometimes hard to… well, understand.” Without a care, Rainbow Dash grabs a marshmallow from Fluttershy’s backpack, putting it on her stick and holds it above the fire.

“That makes two things you should apologize for, Rainbow Dash,” Rarity states before flipping her hair over her shoulder, her eyes staring intently at the rainbow-haired athlete.

“Two things? What else did I do?” she responds in a clueless manner, taking a bite of her partially melted marshmallow.

“Oh, come off it, Rainbow Dash! You know you were the main reason the fight we had on Valentine’s Day lasted as long as it did.” Rarity’s angry statement shows that she still holds some sort of grudge from that day, surprising me. I thought the two of them had made up?

“Sugarcube, don’t you think-”

“Darling, don’t get in the middle of this,” Rarity interrupts Applejack with a harsh stare before looking back at Rainbow Dash. “Don’t you remember you practically insinuated I am Applejack’s pet?”

Rainbow Dash’s eyebrow quickly raises as she looks around at all of us. “That’s not fair, Rarity! I said that you only made your decision due to Applejack’s influence! I never said that you were a pet or whatever.”

“Telling me that I only follow my girlfriend’s lead is removing my individuality as a lady AND it makes it sound like you’re saying my reasons were not just.” Her own grimace grows, Rarity’s eyes narrowing slightly. “Am I not my own person with a right to my own opinion?”

“W-well, I… don’t think she was trying to say that,” Fluttershy whispers, standing up from her seated position to try and deescalate the situation.

“You too, Fluttershy? Are you telling me you don’t think she was de-valuing me as a woman by saying I’m like a lapdog for AJ?” Rarity aims her hand at Rainbow Dash with a surprised expression.

“If anything, you’re seeming like a psycho right now,” Rainbow Dash remarks, giving the fashionista her own stare.

“Rainbow. I would suggest you don’t talk about my girlfriend like that.”

“Darling, stop defending me! It just makes me look worse if I can’t stand up for myself,” Rarity lets out with an exasperated breath, clearly tired of Applejack’s influence.

“I mean, Rarity kind of has a point, Rainbow,” Sunset states from beside me. “That was really rude of you and you still haven’t apologized.

“Apologized? I should apologize? What happened to them admitting they were wrong about Dagi?” Rainbow Dash stands up with an outraged look on her face, spreading her arms out as if to say she doesn’t know why she’s in trouble. “I stood by you back then and I chose to be fair, but I’m the bad guy?”

“No one said you’re the bad guy, Dash. Though, I admit it was a stressful situation, so I can understand lashing out,” I finally interject, finding my own words to put into the conversation.

“You would know a lot about lashing out, huh?” Twilight remarks in an uncharacteristically confident tone, her eyes staring at me with a small frown. Her hand slowly rubs her arm, showing that she’s still affected by my outburst with her earlier.

Sunset’s eyes look to me with a sense of confusion, opening her mouth slightly. “Adagio… Are you saying it was okay for Rainbow to lash out at Rarity?”

“No, but I was saying that I could… well, understand her point-of-view.” I try my best to shake my head and appease Sunset, seeing her clear discomfort with what she thought I was saying.

“I still don’t see why I should apologize to someone who’s acting like a stuck up brat,” Rainbow Dash lets out angrily, her eyes staring into Rarity’s. “You even accepted you were wrong, so leave it at that.”

“Why I-” Rarity stops herself mid-yell, holding her mouth before she takes a deep breath. Without wasting another moment, she quickly grabs her purse and brushes off her shorts. “I’m not going to stay here with someone who won’t acknowledge her own misdeeds. At least I had the decency to say ‘I’m sorry.’”

“Oh? You’re acting all high and mighty again, huh? Fine! Maybe it was too soon to see you again!” Rainbow exclaims before flipping the fashionista off, a singular tear coming to Rainbow’s eye.

“Dash, Rarity, stop. I’m sure we ca-” before I can finish my words, both girls shoot me a deadly glare, Rarity quickly stomping away from the fire.

“Dagi! Just stop!” Rainbow yells in anger, gripping her head before walking in an opposite direction of the fire, Applejack looking between the two girls.

“Rainbow! Rarity! Um… Just… stay here, y’all. Please. I’ll be back,” Applejack pleads with us before running in the direction Rarity had stomped off in, leaving all of us with a surprised expression.

“I think I should go too,” Twilight says in a quiet and monotone voice, picking up her own bag with Spike inside. Spike’s eyes widen as he looks up at her, surprised by this turn of events.

“Huh? Twilight? Why are we leaving?” he asks her, only for her to zip up the bag, her eyes avoiding him. Before leaving, Twilight stares at me one more time, quickly walking away from the fire.

“Wait,” Sunset weakly lets out beside me, looking all around her for the people who left the fire. “It… wasn’t supposed to go like this. I…” Tears start to form in Sunset’s eyes as she stares into the darkness. Every time I see her cry, it never gets better. It always hurts my heart and I can’t help but try to help her feel better. Before I can even try to hold her hand, Sunset stands up from the log, quickly walking away from us. “Twilight! Wait, please! We can still talk this out!” Her fiery-hair quickly gets farther away from the fire, tears streaming down her face the whole time.

“Sunset?” Without wasting a second, Sunset stops me from following her by holding out her hand, shaking her head with her watery eyes connecting with mine, running completely into the darkness after Twilight. Once again, the only sound to be heard is the sizzling fire that we were all sitting around, but now only three of us are left… Why did Rarity and Rainbow Dash have to argue? We were having a good time and then… Everything went to shit. There always have to be problems…

Sitting back down on the log, I can’t help but sigh, looking towards Fluttershy and Pinkie to see if they would leave me too. Pinkie Pie’s hair straightens out once more, her eyes becoming dull as she stares into the fire. “Well… that was fun…”