Author's Note

DISCLAIMER: This story includes references to depression, depressing thoughts, insecurities, anxiety, self-harm, blood, depictions or references to sexual activity and thoughts based around all of these concepts. If you do not want to read a story with slight references to these, I would urge you to click off.

AN: Once again, a short upload~ Only a couple more chapters to go until the end, so I hope everyone enjoys~ Stay special, everybody!

Still More Work to Do

Chapter XX: Still More Work to Do

The air around us is cold, adding to the gray sky of the morning. Thankfully, I’m already wearing a scarf and leather jacket, but my legs only have shorts and leggings on, making them pretty cold. Combine that with the fact that none of us got sleep last night, it just makes me feel worse. I really wanted last night to end off in a good way, but it seems that wasn’t going to happen. I assumed Rarity and Rainbow Dash had already made up, but I was just blind… “Okay. We’ve already established that Rarity and Rainbow are mad at each other,” I say quietly, pacing back and forth in front of the bench Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy sit on. During the night, we eventually decided to leave the Apple Family farm and go to Garden Hooves Park. “The main reason is because Rainbow Dash won’t apologize for her treatment of Rarity. Now, I’ll admit, I wasn’t there for the full fight, I don’t have the full details.”

“Oh, well, um… Not a lot happened other than what you saw. Rainbow Dash and Rarity insulted each other a little more, but the main reason is the fact that Dash sorta invalidated her as a person,” Fluttershy tells me with a nod, her hands placed on her knees as we think about the situation.

“And then there’s something going on with you and Twilight,” Pinkie states in a depressed tone, her straight hair partially covering one of her eyes. “Which you still haven’t told us about.” Bringing my hand to my face, I sigh quietly, biting my lip at the memory.

“I… kinda had an outburst with Twilight and scared her. I didn’t mean the words I said, but it happened nonetheless.” Searching my bag for my phone, I flip it open to look for any new notifications.

“You still have a flip phone?” Fluttershy asks me quietly, her eyes seemingly showing her surprise with that fact.

“Well, I can’t exactly afford a new one at this time.” Looking at my phone’s screen, I can’t help but frown as I see multiple texts from Apple Bloom, all of them from yesterday afternoon. Other than that, I have a couple of notifications from Rainbow Dash. “It seems that Dash texted me last night. She seems pretty pissed from the texts, so I would assume both her and Rarity are mad about last night.”

“Then what are we going to do? It’s not a great idea to push them together when emotions are still high,” Pinkie says in an uncharacteristically wise statement, flipping her hair away from her eyes.

Before I can answer the party girl, my phone begins to vibrate, a ringtone being heard by all three of us. “Sorry. Just give me a minute,” I tell the girls before walking away from the two of them towards the park playground. Looking at the phone’s screen, my eyes widen slightly at the contact name listed. Huh… You finally called. Clicking the accept call button, I quickly bring it to my ear with a deep breath. “Hello, Rich. Please tell me this is important. I’m kind of busy right now.”

A deep chuckle comes from the other end of the line, making me roll my eyes at his reaction. “Too busy to hear some good news?” His laugh lasts for a few moments after his sentence, finally clearing his throat. “This is important, Dazzle. Those items you lost? I fulfilled my end of the bargain and found them.” He actually found them…? I was a bit reluctant to trust him, especially when it took him multiple days without any update, but… I’m glad he pulled through.

“Thank you, Rich. This… really means a lot to me,” I say quietly in the most genuine tone I’ve used around him before. It really is a big deal that he was able to help me with this. I wouldn’t have been able to find our stuff by myself. Not to mention the fact that I was so angry that day I probably would have hurt the person who stole our stuff.

“It will arrive at my house tomorrow morning. You can come collect it and see if any of your items are missing.” Rich seemingly stops himself mid sentence, leaving a long pause in the air. “Just don’t forget your end of the bargain, Dazzle~”

“You know I won’t,” I whisper into the microphone, trying to make sure none of my words are heard by the two girls behind me. Within a moment, the call ends with a tone indicating he hung up. He doesn’t have to remind me every single time we talk… It’s like he expects me to forget the deal we made when I’ve clearly shown I hold up my promises. I just hope he legitimately got everything back… If one thing is missing, I’ll have to talk to him… Turning around, I look at Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie with a smile, approaching them quickly. “I agree with what you said, Pinkie. It’ll be a bit difficult to make things right again without waiting for some of the emotions to die down. Fortunately, I was just given an opportunity that I think will help me get through to Rainbow Dash.” Pinkie Pie’s eyebrow raises, leaning forward to hear me better.

“Okay? What is it?”

“I can’t quite tell you that just yet… But trust me. I can talk to Dash tomorrow. I will just need the help of Applejack.”

Fluttershy perks up after hearing my words, bringing a finger to her chin. “And I can try to talk to Rarity while you do that~ Maybe we can get the two of them to talk to each other tomorrow as well~”

“I wouldn’t advise it,” I say quietly, looking away from the two. “Rainbow Dash will only believe that I’m actually trying to make things right instead of just ganging up on her if I give her a bit of space. Which means we will have to wait until the day after tomorrow to introduce the two of them again.”

“I can go with Fluttershy…” Pinkie Pie slowly pulls a purple balloon out of her pocket, blowing it up within a few seconds. Using a sharpie she pulls out of her hair, she draws a face on the balloon, resembling Twilight. How did she hide that sharpie in her hair…? Especially when it’s flat like this? “But that still leaves the question about Twily and all. What will we do about her?” That… is a valid question.

“Sunset looked like she was going to talk to her, right?” Fluttershy asks the two of us, her eyes switching between us.

“Yes, but knowing how hard it’s been for her, I’m not sure if she got through to Twilight,” I whisper in response, rubbing my arm slowly. “Let’s just say Sunset and I have had… a couple fights recently. She’s also been having a really hard time at work and she was counting on this reunion to make things right between everyone. But now that things have kinda gotten worse, I’m afraid she might be closing herself off.”

“Sunset? Closing herself off?” Fluttershy’s eyes widen in surprise, staring into my own eyes with concern. “What makes you think she will do that?”

A nervous grin comes to my face, bringing my hand to my scarf to feel its soft fabric. The truth is that I’m scared for her… Ever since I saw her try to hurt herself, I can’t help but worry about her every time something bad happens. With everything going to shit like this, I don’t know how she’s going to handle it. If she ends up hurting herself again, I don’t know if I will be able to forgive myself… Especially since it feels like most of this is my fault. I should have paid more attention to Rarity and Rainbow Dash. I shouldn’t have blown up at Twilight and I should have helped Apple Bloom. It’s like all of this is my fault, but I know that technically isn’t true. I just need to remember that I’m doing my best. Right…? “Well, combined with all the stress of her internship, school, the lack of her friends in her life, the couple of arguments we’ve had and the recent break-in, I can’t help but think she’s going to close herself off from mostly everyone. That’s my first priority. I’m going to try to talk to Sunset when I get home today and we can work on everyone else in the following days.”

I can’t help but feel a little awkward, seeing both of them stare at me with a confused tone. “A break-in…?” Fluttershy whispers, clearly worried about what that entails.

“Some of our stuff was stolen a few days ago. But it will be okay. Just don’t worry about us. I’ll probably need Sunset’s help to get on Twilight’s good side, but if I can’t get her to help, I’ll need you two.” The wind blows harder against me, reminding me how cold it is outside. “Go home and get some sleep… We’re going to need the rest, especially if we’re going to try and fix things before Sunset’s birthday.”

Fluttershy squeaks in a high-pitched tone, causing both of us to look at her with confusion. “I forgot about her birthday! Isn’t it in a week?” Giving her a simple nod, Fluttershy’s expression turns to a nervous one, looking down at the floor. “How are we going to do this in one week?”

“We can do it. I apologized to everyone within a week and became friends with you girls. We’ll just need to work together. Speaking of which, do you have my phone number yet, Pinkie?” Pinkie Pie shakes her head, pulling out her phone, but before I can speak, Fluttershy simply shows her screen to Pinkie. Without waiting, Pinkie inputs something into her phone, probably adding me as a contact. Even though I have a flip phone and Pinkie has a phone that's at least five years old, Fluttershy’s device looks like it’s one of the most recent models in the market. How does she have the money to afford that…?

“Good luck with Sunset,” Fluttershy tells me with a kind smile, standing up from her seated position. Pinkie quickly follows suit, stretching her legs slightly. Bringing her hands to her hair, she poofs it back up to its previous state, her eyes looking at the two of us with a smile.

“We’ll all need luck, silly. We have a party to plan with a bunch of sour guests~”

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Closing the door quietly, I look around our dark apartment, despite the light outside from the morning sun. It shouldn’t be a surprise that it’s dark inside since it’s still early in the morning, but a part of me can’t help but worry that’s a bad sign. Quickly taking off my scarf and jacket, I kick off my boots as quietly as possible, pulling off my shorts and tights as I do so. Last night went horribly… I should have expected such, but I was blind with my own emotions. Now we have to try and fix things within a week. I don’t want to let Sunset have a horrible birthday due to my stupidity and everyone else’s arrogance… Things can be fixed. Right? I mean, Rich got our stuff back and it looks like we’ll be able to organize everything with Sunset’s friends. Our friends…

Everything keeps going downhill, but I refuse to let it happen any more. Not when I’ve realized just how much she means to me and how much our life has affected me. I can’t just sit idly by and give up because things failed this time. I need to be strong. For her. For us. I know we can make it past this. If we were able to make it past my attempts to avoid her and everyone else, we can fix this. It will just take a bit of work, that’s all. She picked me up at my lowest. I owe her the same courtesy. I love her more than anything in the world and I can’t imagine just letting her drown in despair.

Walking down the hallway, I quietly grab the doorknob, opening the door to look inside. Sunset’s colorful hair barely peaks out of the top of the blanket as the lump in the blanket lays still, the light of the sun barely coming inside our window. I… Oh… My smile is immediately wiped away though as I look at my side of the bed… There, laying on top of the sheets, is a bright and shining blade… The same damn thing I can’t seem to get out of my memories. Please don’t tell me… Quietly making my way inside the room, I grab the knife from my side of the bed, inspecting it immediately. There’s no stain on it, so… maybe she didn’t use it…?

“Don’t worry. I couldn’t bring myself to do it,” her voice quietly states without turning around, causing me to look at the lump in the bed with surprise. The sadness in her voice doesn’t go unnoticed, making me all the more grateful she didn’t actually use it. Putting the knife down on the bedside table, I slowly sit down on the bed, bringing my hand to her shoulder with no response. Sunset… Please, talk to me.

“Are you okay?” I whisper, sliding the blanket over me as I get closer to her, bringing the fiery-haired woman into my embrace. This spooning position isn’t ideal since it gives me very little idea how Sunset is actually feeling, but this is all I can do for now.

“No,” she whispers back as a response, not moving an inch. “But I couldn’t bring myself to use that knife because I remembered what you’ve told me. That you love me and such.” I do love you… with all my heart. In a way, it should warm my heart that she didn’t end up hurting herself because she remembered how much I care about her, but the worrying thoughts in my mind still persist. Wrapping my arm around her, I slowly reach for her lower stomach, feeling for any wet sensation… “Even though I just told you I didn’t cut myself, you’re still checking, huh? I guess that just goes to show how thoughtful you are.” Despite her kind and loving words, her tone doesn’t change from how depressed it was when she first spoke. “At least you’re still here.”

“Your friends are still here too, Sunset,” I whisper, getting closer to her to share my warmth with her.

“Let’s not lie to each other, Alligator. Last night was the final straw. We could have fixed things, but it all got messed up. I’m…” Sunset’s tone cracks slightly, causing her to stop her sentence. Her hand comes up to her face, wiping away whatever tears formed with ease. “I’m losing my friends… And now it can’t be stopped.”

“Sunset. You’re not-”

“Adagio. Please,” she says with tears in her eyes, finally looking back at me and trying to hold back her cracked voice. “Just… don’t lie to me. Please just stay with me and let me try to sleep, okay?” she pleads with me, trying desperately to hold everything together. I can finally see Sunset’s bedside table, but the sight I see only makes me feel worse. It’s absolutely covered in tissues, presumably meaning she’s been crying all night. Has she not gotten any sleep either…?

“Alright,” I whisper, holding her as close to my body as I can. As a thank you, Sunset lays her lips against my cheek before putting her head back down on the pillow. Despite the intent behind her kiss, it felt weak and out of energy. Sunset really thinks that it’s all over… I promise that I won’t let that happen. I love you…

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“I don’t know if I can, sugarcube,” the orange cowgirl tells me from her front door, a solemn expression on her face. Just like yesterday, the day is cold and more or less gray, making me wear jeans with my attire. It’s almost like the world knows exactly how we feel, making the atmosphere align with our emotions. It’s depressing…

“Applejack, I know that you’re busy trying to reason with your girlfriend, but I could really use some help to get through to Rainbow Dash. It will probably only take a couple of hours. Tops.” The cowgirl raises her eyebrow at me suspiciously, only to shake her head slowly.

“I’m real sorry. I wouldn’t do a lick of good. It’s not like Rainbow would listen to me. With Rarity, I at least have a chance.”

“Oh come off it, Applejack. Stop acting like you don’t matter all that much when you and Dash have been friends for years now. You’re clearly her best friend and she misses you. Well, she misses everyone, but especially hanging out with you.” Taking a deep breath, I try to calm myself a bit, not wanting another fiasco like what happened with Twilight. Clasping my hands together, I can’t help but feel surprised that I’m about to do this. I’ve never had to do this before, but… desperate times call for desperate measures. “Please, Applejack. I need help. Not for my sake, but for Sunset’s.” Applejack’s expression turns to a worried one as her eyes open wider, slowly walking out on the porch and closing the door behind her.

“Is something wrong, sugar…? I know we haven’t been friends for long, but I hope ya know you can talk to me if you need to.” To be honest, I already know that… But it’s hard for me to rely on someone in general. It’s hard to open up about my problems since I’m used to being the strong boss girl rather than relying on someone to help me through something. Even when things get hard like this, my mind would rather deal with it myself than let someone else in on the pain I’m going through. But this time…? It’s not just me. This involves the love of my life and I… I’m worried…

“It’s Sunset,” I say quietly with a couple tears forming in my eyes, trying my damned best to keep myself from breaking down. Keep those walls up, Adagio… “I’m… worried that she’s closing herself off completely. She’s so depressed and she’s convinced that… she’s losing her friends and her life.” Damn it, Adagio… Why do you have to let these tears out…? I just… don’t want to lose her to this. She can beat this, right…? Bringing my hand to my face, I try my best to hide my tears, only feeling my walls crack a little more. “Please, AJ. You know w-what it’s like to love someone… with all your heart… I need to fix this. F-for her sake.” A strike of pain goes through my heart… I can’t think like that. It’ll be fine… She means the world to me. I don’t want her to close herself off… I can’t do this alone.

Gently, Applejack’s hand grabs my shoulder, causing me to look at her, trying to not cry anymore. It’s a futile attempt at this point… When it comes to Sunset, I can’t help but feel so emotional for her… She’s my everything. “That won’t happen. She ain’t losing her friends. It’s just… a little bump in the road, that’s all,” Applejack tries to reassure me, giving me the kindest smile she can.

“I tried telling her that, but she didn’t listen. I just… I don’t know what I can do other than try to fix this…” Sniffling just a little more, I try my best to take deep breaths, looking away from Applejack. “F-Fluttershy and Pinkie are helping me, but they are going to try to talk to Rarity. I can’t talk to Dash alone… I need help, Applejack.” A conflicted look comes to the cowgirl’s face, her eyes looking towards the ground before giving me a slow nod.

“Alright. I can come talk with Rainbow. Just give me a few minutes to change into something worthy of going out and I’ll be ready.” I can’t help but feel a happy feeling come to me upon hearing her words. I will need all the help I can get if I want to fix all of this before Sunset’s birthday. She won’t lose her friends after all. I promised that wouldn’t happen.

Instantly, I wrap my arms around the cowgirl, hugging her as tightly as I can with a smile on my face. “Thank you, Applejack~”

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The walk to Rainbow Dash’s home is usually a long one, but it only took five minutes this time around. The main reason for the faster time is due to the fact that Applejack drove me there in her family truck, making the trip much less tiresome. I’m used to walking everywhere, but a part of me wishes I could take a car everywhere rather than tire my legs out all the time. Honestly, the thought of owning that motorcycle is even more enticing now. Not only would it give my legs a break, but it would help Sunset get back and forth to places. Alright, Adagio. Stop it. You need to focus.

Hopping out of the truck, I close the door to the vehicle, walking down the sidewalk towards the house. Applejack quickly catches up to me, putting her hat back on as she does so. The cowgirl is the first one to knock on the door, a determined expression coming to her. “We can do this, Adagio. I promise,” she reassures me, patting my shoulder slowly. I really hope so… If this doesn’t go well, I’m not sure what we will do. I need this to go alright. I need everything to be fixed because if it doesn’t… I’m afraid Sunset will close herself off. If she does that, she will be losing a part of herself. Sunset is always so happy and outgoing, finding the will to be confident and determined in even the darkest situations. To see that smile, even when the odds are stacked against you? It’s like heaven… If she loses that hopeful attitude and the courage she’s always carried with her, I don’t know what I will do.

The sound of the front door’s lock snaps me back to reality, making me pay attention. Within a moment, Rainbow Dash peaks outside the door, surprise washing over her before she fully opens the door. “Oh, hey, guys,” is all she says for a moment, scratching her head. Stepping out on the porch, she makes eye contact with both of us, all of us seemingly unsure what to say. “How are you both doing?”

“Not great after the day before yesterday,” Applejack slowly responds, leaning against one of the pillars holding a roof over the porch. She was able to come up with something to say a lot quicker than I would have… I’m grateful she’s here. I’m honestly a mess.

“Yeah…” Rainbow Dash scraps her shoe against the porch, laying her back on the wall of the house. “I assume this visit is about that…?”

“Yup,” the cowgirl responds in a short manner, sounding like her brother.

“Dash. I… I don’t want to make it seem like we’re against you or anything. You’re a good friend of mine,” I quietly let out, making eye contact with the rainbow-haired girl.

“But you want me to apologize, right?” Her question takes the words right out of my mouth, her eyes averting mine and opting to look down at the porch with a solemn expression. Applejack looks at me with confusion, her face telling me she’s not sure what to say now. Other than a simple ‘yes,’ what is there to be said? “I know. I thought a lot about it yesterday. I was kinda being an ass to Rarity…” Without wasting another moment, Rainbow Dash’s eyes look up at mine, her sad gaze somehow full of determination. “I especially thought about what you said. How I was being loyal to my friends, but that made me pick sides way too easily.”

“I mean, that is one of the main issues,” Applejack pitches in, tilting her hat upward. “Sugarcube, I know Valentine’s Day was a long time ago and it doesn’t seem like it should matter, but-”

“Yeah, yeah. I know. It affected Rarity and all… I’m not blind.” Rainbow Dash’s solemn expression remains as she chuckles to herself in a quiet tone. “I kinda screwed everything up two nights ago, huh? I already know I need to apologize.” Dash’s eyes look up at us, slowly raising an eyebrow. “What’s with the funny looks…?”

Looking over at Applejack, a surprised emotion is written all across her face, making her seemingly speechless for a few moments. “Well, I… It was just easier than we thought it would be, that’s all.”

“What? Did you think I was going to be stubborn and pig-headed about it? I know I was wrong,” Rainbow Dash admits, her eyes showing skepticism at our reactions. I wasn’t expecting Rainbow Dash to want to apologize so quickly afterward. Even if it has been two days, it still surprises me. It’s a good turn of events, finally…

“Eh, you don’t want to know the answer to that,” I slowly remark, causing Applejack to laugh a little. “I’m glad though. That you want to apologize and all.”

“Of course I do. It’s been way too long since everyone has been together and I screwed it up by not acknowledging Rarity’s feelings. I’m not always stubborn,” Dash states while crossing her arms, her eyes looking towards me. “When do you guys want me to talk to her…?”

“Not until tomorrow. Rarity’s still pretty upset and Fluttershy is talking with her with the assistance of Pinkie Pie. We’re kind of hoping that both of y’all can make up tomorrow morning,” the cowgirl informs the athlete with a gesture of her hand, seemingly trying to convey the complexity of it all.

“In time for Sunset’s birthday. She’s… not doing well.” Both Rainbow Dash and Applejack look towards me, Applejack’s eyes filled with understanding whereas Dash looks confused.

“This has affected Sunset too…?” Rainbow asks me nervously, guilt coming over her face. “I… I’m sorry. Yeah. I can try my best to make it up with Rarity tomorrow. Is there anything else I can do in the meantime?” Upon hearing Rainbow Dash’s words, Applejack’s face lights up as if an idea came to her.

“Well, ya could ride along with us. We’re going to be moving a couple boxes of Sunset and Adagio’s belongings.” Rainbow Dash simply raises her eyebrow to Applejack’s request, stepping away from the wall.

“Huh…? Are they moving or something?”

“Do you remember when Sunset and I’s apartment got robbed? Well, I… found our stuff again.” I didn’t find any of it. Rich did. He actually held up his end of the bargain in a seemingly losing situation and I can’t thank him enough for it. I am surprised he was able to find our items a few days after they were stolen. Each day makes it less likely they will be recovered, but he was able to do it.

“Huh. You know what? Yeah. I can help you guys out. If it helps Sunset a bit, then it will be a step in the right direction of making things right.” Rainbow Dash gives us both a thumbs up, trying to smile in the most genuine way she can. “Last one to the truck is a rotten egg?”

Applejack’s brow furrows slightly, crossing her arms. “You. Wouldn’t. Dare.”