Beavis and Butt-Head Do Equestria

Beavis and Butt-Head Do Equestria - By Nocturne

The heat was on... The Great and Powerful Trixie has challenged the Great Cornholio to a performance dual.

Beavis with his shirt rolled over his head; paced back and forth chanting, "I'M A CORNHOLIO!"
He definitely got everypony's attention, "I NEED TP FOR MY BUNGHOLE!"

Spike the dragon turned to Twilight Sparkle, "Hey Twilight. What's a bunghole?"

Twilight's horn glowed and out of thin air a pony version of a dictionary poofed in front of her. The unicorn used her horn again to flip through the pages, "Let's see... Bunghole, bunghole..."

"MY BUNGHOLE GOES RATATATATA!" Beavis chanted.

Twilight placed her hoof onto the word she was looking for, "Bunghole... A hole in a keg or barrel which liquid could be poured or drained from..." The unicorn raised an eyebrow, "He needs this TP for his barrel?"

Beavis walked onto the stage to confront the blue boasting unicorn to accept her challenge. The great and powerful Trixie studied the strange being that accepted her challenge. Tall, skinny, blonde hair peeking through the collar of the shirt, beady eyes, sharp eyebrows, strange underbite. She spoke up still in a commanding tone, "So you call yourself the Great Cornholio is it?"

"DAMN STRAIGHT!" Beavis shook his fists radically at his sides.

"Well then, the great and powerful Trixie challenges you to a magic off!" Trixie explained, "But how about a wager then?"

"Um... okay..." Beavis mumbled.

"If I win the events then you drop the GREAT from your name, you'll kneel before me and kiss my front hoof." Trixie demanded.

"Eh heh heh. Um..." Beavis really tried to think of some demands then shouted, "IF THE GREAT CORNHOLIO WINS! YOU MUST GIVE ME ALL YOUR TP!"

Trixie didn't know what TP was but she agreed.

Back at the table Rainbow Dash asked, "Hey Butt-head? What is TP?"

Butt-head chuckled, "Dude if you don't know then I'm not going to tell you. Uh huh huh."

"It's a deal." Trixie grinned.

The first competition was to grab the crowd's attention. Beavis was left stumped on what to do as Trixie continued to use her magic for her performance but suddenly a thought raced across her mind. What if she made him fall? Her horn glowed and a blue aura surrounded Beavis.

"Huh? Eh heh heh." Beavis wondered where the aura came from. Before he knew it he was floating about a good few feet off the ground. This according to her plan she was going to make it look like he was flying, and that's what she did. Beavis was light as a feather; Trixie gently moved Beavis up and down to let him enjoy for now.

"RUN AS YOU MAY! YOU CAN NOT ESCAPE THE FLYING BUNGHOLE!" Beavis chanted.
Trixie sneered, the aura around Beavis disappeared. The blonde fell flat onto his face on the hardwood planks.Trixie bowed but the crowd wasn't very pleased.

"Eh... heh ow..." Beavis moaned as he felt his ribs. Just then, the horn he kept earlier in his pocket rolled to his face.

Butt-head put his hand to the side of his mouth and yelled from the back, "Beavis! Uh huh huh. Get up you wuss!"

Beavis chuckled as he grabbed the horn and slowly rose to his feet, shirt still over his head and raised his arms, "IT WILL TAKE MORE THAN THAT TO STOP THE ALMIGHTY BUNGHOLE!" A dark aura glowed around the sharp object, Beavis's face lifted, he felt power. He pointed the horn at Trixie and shouted, "ALL HAIL THE MIGHTY BUNGHOLE!" The horn shot out a black thunderbolt and blasted off Trixie's hat.

Trixie yelped, "WHAT IN THE?"

Beavis's eyes widened, the smile on his face grew as he continued to shake. Trixie dusted off her hat and put it back on, "Fine... good show then... you managed to singe the great and powerful Trixie's hat."

The next competition was to play music with their magic.Trixie wasted no time summoning instruments you would find in an orchestra. Her magic also conjured up transparent ponies to play them. They played the instrumental version of Winter Wrap Up. Half of the crowd clapped. Others admired the tune and started to sing a long.

"Winter wrap up winter wrap up!" Some of the ponies cheered even if it wasn't the season for the song.

"Have to admit." Twilight crossed her arms, "She does have good taste in music."

Butt-head on the other hand was in disgust as he had no admiration for whatever the hell he just heard.Trixie took a bow. Beavis on the other hand rubbed his chin and still chuckled. He noticed Trixie used a spell for the instruments, maybe he could do something similar. He looked down at the horn in his hand as it started to glow again. He waved it around he knew what he wanted. Now instead of Trixie's classical instruments were now replaced with everything related to heavy metal. The background changed from an ice blue to now a dark red. Beavis conjured up some ponies that looked rather similar to the band White Zombie. The sound from the instruments were dark yet satisfying. The lead singer passed off as pony version of Rob Zombie stepped up to the microphone and began the chilling lyrics...

Unlike the devil,
I've never seen the face of god,
Sweet Mr. Jesus,
Infected on my skin,
Demons surround you,
I'm crawling on the ground,
Shame for another,
Another taste of life
It's alive, oh everybody
It's alive, oh the creepers call me

"Sounds pretty bone chilling." Rainbow Dash observed, she smiled, "I like it."

It's alive, oh everybody
It's alive, oh the creepers call me

Just then the pyrotechnics kicked in with fire whirling like a pin wheel on stage along with smoke from the fog machine blowing out into the audience.

Dead parts surround you,
Draw me forever black,
My creature core is,
Is crawlin on the ground,
Calling another
Unholy wall of sound,
Say that you love it
Don't make me turn it down

At this time both Beavis and Butt-head were head banging. To everyones surprise Pinkie Pie was dancing on the table to the chilling song. Rainbow Dash rooted her on and soon was enjoying the song enough to join her.

It's alive, oh everybody
It's alive, oh the creepers call me

Since Spike was the only one with fingers, he held up a lighter and waved it.

It's alive, oh everybody
It's alive, oh the creepers call me

Soon the music started to die down. The crowd was in awe, they loved it. They clopped and cheered for the mysterious stranger. Trixie didn't know what to make of this. She didn't want to face defeat for a second time. The horn Beavis was holding dimmed and made the band and illusions retreat and at this point the cornholio persona wore off.

The next competition, Trixie was desperate. "The next competition will be comedy." Trixie announced.

Trixie as always went first, "The great and powerful Trixie will be telling a series of jokes for this act." Trixie cleared her throat, "Why did the bald stallion paint rabbits on his head?" The crowd waited for the punch line, "Because from a distance they looked like hares."

Some ponies gave a good chuckle, Fluttershy was the only one on the floor laughing so hard. Pinkie Pie had to think about the punch line for a moment to sink in, Rainbow Dash was "Meh." A cough could be heard.

Beavis was stumped. "Hey Butt-head! Eh heh heh." He called from the stage.

"What do you want butt munch?" Butt-head replied back yelling from his table.

"Shut up asswipe!" Beavis chuckled and argued back.

"Dill hole!" Butt-head shouted back.

"Turd burglar!" Beavis replied.

At this time some of the ponies were starting to laugh at the funny words.

"Butt knocker!" Butt-head shouted. That was it, Beavis came down from the stage and tackled Butt-head in his seat. Pinkie and Rainbow parted away from the two fighting just to watch. Unfortunately as the two kept arguing, the fire pyrotechnics were still on due to Trixie's carelessness. Suddenly the curtains were on fire, engulfing the entire back of the stage. The ponies started to scream and panic. The two stopped fighting. Butt-head with eyes wide open,

"WHOA!" He chuckled. Beavis also with his eyes wide open and a devilish smile on his face,

"Oh oh oh..." He said, amazed at the dancing flames.

The rest of the crowd was scattered, some were running away the others trying to put out the fire. Within the hour, the fire was finally put out thanks to Rainbow Dash making it rain. Beavis and Butt-head just stood there, still laughing at the event.

Trixie approached the two again she put on her boasting face, "Well well well... Apparently because of this incident the whole battle between the great and powerful Trixie and great Cornholio is going to have to conclude at another date."

"Uh... Okay..." Butt-head replied.

"Now if you two excuse me, the great and powerful Trixie be off to perform elsewhere." Trixie turned around only to be face to face with the mane six.

Twilight was holding a burnt firework machine and tossed it in front of Trixie, "Next time before you do a show, make sure your equipment isn't faulty." Twilight wasn't happy, she wanted Trixie to leave. "Because of this, the mayor's office is also pretty much burned."

"Cool, eh heh heh." Beavis added, he turned his attention away to go back to the dessert table but an m-80 firework fell from his pocket that got Spike's attention. The little dragon picked it up and thought it was a type of candle.

"Oh oh!" Pinkie interjected, "Technically you lost too! I've been keeping tallies!" She smiled.

"WHA?" Trixie scoffed.

"Mr. Beavis got more cheers from the crowd than you did Trixie." Pinkie explained.

"That's the great and powerful Trixie to you!" Trixie was ticked.

"Shut up... uh huh huh." Butt-head interrupted.

"THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE DEMANDS YOU TO SHUT UP!" Trixie fumed.

Apple Jack tossed a bag of bits in front of Trixie, "Just take this and mosey on home Trixie so we all can call it a night. Ya already ruined yer reputation once."

"The great and powerful Trixie has never tarnished her reputation!" Trixie exclaimed.

"It's either that or we can tell the fire department your equipment started the fire and you could possibly be arrested for endangering the ponies of Ponyville." Twilight explained not in a happy tone.

Trixie threw down her hat and cape in frustration. Using her magic she levitated the bag of bits and went to her stage coach and slammed the door loudly. Beavis on the other hand finished off the rest of the cupcakes. Pinkie picked up Trixie's hat and cap and trotted over to Beavis, she jumped onto the nearby table and slid the hat onto him and wrapped the cape around him.

"BEHOLD THE GREAT AND POWERFUL CORNHOLIO!" Beavis chanted.

Suddenly they heard a small explosion. And Spike screaming and holding his little hand.

"Oh sweet Celestia SPIKE JUST BLOWN OF HIS FINGERS!" Rarity yelled.

Just then Pinkie bursted out laughing.

Twilight trying to cover up Spike’s hand with a towel, her neck craned to Pinkie, “THIS IS NOT FUNNY PINKIE! WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU?”

“I just finally got Trixie’s joke.” Pinkie giggled, it did not take long for the two teens to join in as well.

ooo

Song used: Ratfinks, Suicide Tanks and Cannibal Girls by White Zombie