Celestia was too tired to deal with this. They had just got back from Ponyville, she had been awake all night, and now she can't go to sleep because the castle was in disarray.

"Shining, Cadence, why...? Just why. That's it. You two have to fill in the rest for me. I don't know how to be specific right now. All of this is wrong."

The Princesses had just teleported into the throne room, to announce that court would be held later, only to see Kirby sitting on the throne with Cadence's crown on his head. Said Princess was waiting on him as if she was merely a maid, alongside what felt like half of the kitchen staff. They were also brandishing all of their utensils like they were weapons.

Presumably because of the battalion of guards behind them, led by Shining Armor, who were all preparing offensive spells and getting into formation.

"Shining wants to dethrone Prince Toby!" Apparently Kirby was Toby now.

"That creature needs to be contained! It took out most of Equestria's standing army in one night and now it's got Cadence throwing our food stores into it endlessly!" And, that, that was certainly a surprise.

"He's just a baby! He needs to eat so he'll grow big and strong!"

"It is bottomless and needs to be locked up before it can do any more damage!" Said bottomless pit, was just sucking on a lollipop, as if it didn't have a care in the world.

"Tia, sister, what do we do here?" And Princess Celestia didn't have a clue. This was a mess that was verging on Discord levels of absurd. And then the perpetrator appeared from a star-shaped portal carrying a pink pony sized creature over his shoulder.

"Hey everypony, sorry, I'm in a bit of a rush. I'm here to pick up Toby. Thanks for playing with him and keeping him occupied last night." As if he hadn't just appeared in the middle of a battlefield, he casually walked past all the guards and all the cooks to pick Toby up off the throne before placing him on his head.

"Ah, Sir Elfilis. How, uh, how was your date?" Thank you Luna. That is exactly what we should be focusing on.

"Oh it went well but she set herself on fire so now I got something to take care of for a bit. Talk to me in the dream realm later if you want to discuss anything. Oh and I'm kidnapping Frontline." And then he was gone.

"... Luna? Do you know what just happened?"

"No, Tia. No I do not." Didn't think she would.

"Hmph. Me either. I'm retiring for the day, court is cancelled, bring my lunch to my chambers. Shining, you're in charge of clean-up. Cadence, help him." And then she was off, her sister close behind her. Then it was a room full of armed ponies who weren't sure what to do next. Cadence was just looking at the throne, forlornly.

"He still has my crown..."

"SO NOW HE'S A THIEF!"

Frontline (Carina, whatever), yelped as I put her down. We were back in the cave I had first woken up to. It felt like it had been months, but it had been eight, maybe nine days at most. And I needed a break. So, from that moment forward, I was claiming it as my own under the the name 'Forgo Cave' and no one was allowed inside without express permission from yours truly.

"Uh, Elfilis?"

"What does your kind eat normally? I'm thinking of setting up a kitchen, make it so I can stockpile food so I don't have to be here if someone gets hungry."

"Well, it's a little esoteric, but what is-"

"Is it dreams? Nightmares? Maybe it's happiness, love? It's love isn't it, I see that look. Maybe I can make some Friend Hearts. You think those will work Toby?"

"Poyo."

"Of course, how silly of me. I don't speak Kirby. I'm going to make some Friend Hearts. Maybe I could recreate the Love-Love Stick? Or a really needy Awoofy? Does any love work? Like does it need to be romantic or could it be a little less intimate like love for a pet, or a friend? I mean if you just need friends then Toby has us covered. He's love incarnate by the way-"

"Elfilis! What is, what is happening!? What are you doing!? Where am I?"

"Oh sorry. I'm curling up for a week to just exist, I'm trying to make a livable space for you, and this is the cave I first woke up in near the center of Whitetail Woods. Toby! Get loving. I need to make or procure furniture." And it was into my dream space I went.

Luna hadn't been waiting in his dream for long before he showed up, and because he couldn't do anything normally, it didn't surprise Luna a terrible amount that his physical body was occupying space in his mental projection.

"Elfilis! What is going on? You said your date set herself on fire? And, and why did you kidnap her if she up in flames-"

"Long story, like I said, I'll be free to talk tonight. I need to plan a living space." And Luna found herself back in her bed. It only took her moment to realize what he did before she went back in. "I need to build a wall or something. I'm sorry but I'm busy."

"You can't-" Portal. "Just leave and then... Ffff-" Back into the dream. "Elfilis! We demand an explanation!"

"Later." Guess where Luna found herself.

"That Fucker. Fine. I will get an explanation Sir Elfilis... And now I'm talking to myself."

"So I have yellow antlers, yellow wings, yellow eyes, and my holes disappeared?" She was looking at herself with the broken mirror I left. I'll have Toby eat it later.

"No they didn't, I can see them."

"GAH! Would you stop! For just a moment, please?" I looked away from the couch/bed combo I was floating in through for a long while before I just sighed and let it drop.

"Fine, sorry. But first, why did you think your canals were missing?"

"Not those holes! I swear you get as bad as I do sometimes. Changelings normally have hollower bodies than ponies. Our chitin is heavier than skin and fur so we need the empty spaces in our legs to allow flight. But now they are gone and I am pink!"

"It looks good on you."

"Shut. Shut it. I'm not done yet. Do you, have any idea what could have caused this? You are the only thing that has changed in my life recently." I gave her a cursory scan, she was smaller as Frontline and she almost looked like someone threw neon paint on a firefly. A little 'Poyo!' revealed Toby in the corner, and I stared him down a bit as he began juggling some loose rocks.

"I was right about changelings needing love right? I think your answer is practicing for the circus over there." Carina looked at Toby in disbelief.

"What? How? Is it something about his being 'love incarnate' or whatever?"

"That's exactly it. Him and others like him, are comprised entirely of positive or negative emotions. When I made him I was thinking of Kirby, the most powerful and positive of his kind to my knowledge. I'm willing to bet Toby inherited that trait, if to a lesser extent."

"You made Toby?"

"Did I never get to that?"

"No, you just had him beat-up Stern Rule." Oh hey! I wasn't that far off on his name.

"Okay, well, I made him. I can do that. Back on subject, I do want to set this up today, I'm willing to bet it was his proximity or something that did this. I mean, it could have started while you were hugging him?"

"You can't just transfer love by hugging! You need to know how magic is channelled through the target species and-"

"Toby, give her a hug." She huffed as Toby took a running leap at her and hung from her neck.

"... See? Nothings-" CRACK "... Happening." For those reading at home, that was the sound of her back exploding all over my ceiling, wings and all. She was fine though, she had shinier skin and bigger wings underneath. She looked back at herself, I couldn't see what look she had but I'm sure I could've guessed. Toby busied himself by tearing off her outer chest chitin and eating it to turn into Beetle-Toby.

"There, mystery solved. We'll discuss it over dinner later." The cave was filled with the sounds of furniture sliding across the floor and chitin falling off of Carina for the next few hours. Fun times.

"I- I think I metamorphosized..." I looked at her over my bowl of strawberries. I finally had a reasonable living space set up, sans restroom, though it took some extra work from Toby and his beetle horn to excavate more room. He was currently sitting in Carina's lap at the moment, eating rocks.

"You sure you should be hugging him like that? We don't really know how big you can get. And does your kind normally metamorphosize?"

"I look sexy, I'm going to keep hugging him. And no, well, yes. But not like this obviously. We hatch from an egg, and eventually grow into a body shape to match the dominant species of the area. The default is usually ponies though. Whatever this is," Pointing at all of herself, "It's completely new. Mother is the oldest in the hive and she just looks like a taller one of us."

"Ok, so, besides looking sexy, how do you feel? I don't think Toby, as he is anyway, could make anyone sick if he tried, but I'd still like to confirm." Must have been a good question, I thought as I chewed through another strawberry, She's really thinking about it.

"I... feel. Like more of me. It's like I had been, dying my whole life until this moment. And all this love the little guy's giving me? I don't think I need it, like at all. That's unheard of, there has never been, until me I guess, a changeling who could honestly say that they weren't hungry all of the time." She picked up Toby and rolled him across the table to me. I idly caught him and fed him a strawberry. "But here I am, giving the most potent source of love since the crystal hearts to you, without any regrets."

"Even if he could make you sexier?" I said, putting the purple puff up in my horns.

"Ha ha. Without the same kind of regret, happy?" I shook my head in the affirmative, Toby making it a bigger nod my swinging his body forward and back with me. "Is this going anywhere?"

"Well, if you think you are better than fine, then could this help any other-"

"No."

"-Ookay. Nevermind." She winced at me.

"Sorry!" I was hearing that too much recently. "It's just, I'm still the same changeling I was before, my shell is just new."

"And you don't have a high opinion on your family, yeah I remember. How bad are they really? Too much information or not, the story you told was definitely edited."

"Yeah, they... They aren't good. The reason I was stationed as a royal guard? My sister has some inane plan to take over Canterlot and eat all of the love of the ponies." Crap. "Mother made it so I had to listen to her a few years ago. 'Maybe Chrysie will be able to teach you something about being a real changeling'. Bleh. If being a real changeling is fucking a stallion's soul out and leaving him out to die in the wilds, no thank you. I want nothing to do with that." Double Crap.

"Well, now you don't have to, right? You are a whole new creature now, like I am. Time to make a new life, c'est la vie."

"... What?"

"I don't know, it just sounded right. You know what I mean right?" She looked to Toby, who had stolen my strawberries at some point, and then down at her hot-pink hooves.

"... Yeah. Yeah! You're absolutely right! This is a perfect chance to start again!"

"That's the spirit!"

"I can do whatever I want!"

"Ain't no one stopping you!"

"Lets FUCK!"

"Alright, I'm stopping you."

"Awww..."

"Art thou ready to speak now?" She was already waiting for me when I got there.

"I am, but I really am going to request some privacy until the foreseeable future soon, unless it's an emergency. You can still visit here in the dream whenever. I did promise to try to help, and access to Dream Matter should be educational until i'm ready to come back. I just, I need a break Luna. The past few days have been event after event and I need to not be part of one for awhile." That was pity on her face. It did actually make me feel better.

"Elfilis, of course you can-"

"No I can't. Not just yet. You and the rest of Canterlot are in trouble." Her pity turned to razor focus real fucking fast.

"What is the problem?"

"Okay, let me explain everything before you go and do anything, I may already have a good plan. So, it's like this-"

"So, according to Elfilis and Frontline, now Carina, there is an army of emotivores that can change shape at will looking for their chance to capture and kill everypony in Canterlot, and you want me to, do nothing?" Celestia was a little less appreciative of her sisters smile this time. "Why, exactly, are we ignoring a threat to pony kind?"

"Elfilis has come up with an ingenious plan to keep them away, indefinitely."

"... Are you going to tell me?"

"... How do I know you aren't a changeling?"

"Luna, by all that is holy-"

"What do you mean mother has cancelled my scouting?" Princess Chrysalis wasn't sure she could be more incensed if the messenger in front of her had bucked her in the face. "The castle is in shambles and my sister is missing. I cannot leave now, there is too much to do!"

"I'm sorry Princess, she just said it was urgent. Every changeling is being pulled back to hive. Orders are to leave MIA units behind, it's time sensitive."

"Grrr, fine. This is the last straw mother, this better be good."

Author's Note

The train has left the station, but oh no, it's going sideways.
I'm freeing myself from the main episodes for a bit. This is now-
'Adventures of Elfilis, Toby, and their kidnapped princess."
Stay tuned and all that.