Sushi! Sushi! Sushi!

Somewhere off the southwest shores of Kyushu...

...a lone island resided, stuffed full of concrete and steel buildings overrun with wild vegetation. Soulless remains of a coal processing plant and multiple abandoned apartments formed a decrepit framework under an overcast afternoon sky. The place had been completely isolated and uninhabited for decades.

Well—for the most part, at least.

Just then—on the first floor of one of the many-many-many ruined apartment buildings—a random sliding door glowed with a bright gray haze. There was the magical sound of rustling leaves, then—

Flassssh!

—the door opened to reveal a mountain shrine and blistering sunlight beyond. This light was soon blotted out by the enormous frame of a hulking mountain of a human being: a ridiculously muscular man with turquoise hair, a metal nose, and impossibly bulky shoulders. Wearing little more than cybernetic pauldrons and a crimson speedo, he bouldered his way through the narrow door frame before gracelessly tossing Shinji Kazan's bound body onto an open space of concrete. Through the whole duration, he roared: “Superrrrrr~~!!”

“Gaaaaaaa—Mrmmmfff!!!” Shinji Kazan rolled a few times before colliding with the bent beams of a rusted metal gate. He grunted and writhed on the ground, his bruised body tightly restrained by multiple cuffs along his arms and legs. “Goddamn freak...!”

“Silence, old fool!” The cyborg dusted his hands off before striking a pose with his massive shoulders jutting in the air. Dark shades glinted above a swarthy grin. “You can do absolutely nothing about those bindings.”

“He's absolutely right, you know.” Adagio Dazzle stepped out of the portal, shortly followed by Aria Blaze and Sonata Dusk. “So many powerful quirks you've been given...” She smirked. “It's too bad they only work if you can flex your muscles.” She leaned over and pursed her lips in the air above Kazan's frowning face. “That's a little hard to do when you're tied up tighter than a Filipina cervix on Easter.”

“You will not get away with this...” Kazan hissed. “One way or another, I will—”

“What?” Aria Blaze folded her arms and scowled down at the man. “Piss yourself? Face it, cucksicle. You're a useless slab of flabby meat without your mutant football league superpowers. So just suck it up with whatever millimeters of real manhood you've got left.”

“To think that Sarumaru would ever have bargained with the likes of you—”

“Sarumaru doesn't make mistakes,” Adagio said, standing upright again. “But his clients still can. Thankfully, my dear sisters and I are ahead of the curve.”

“Yeah!” Sonata was finishing a long, gentle hand-stroke across the apartment door. The gray light vanished, and the image of mountain trees was gone for good, replaced with the typical urban ruin of the island. “So what's your excuse, poopyhead?!”

Aria grimaced at Sonata. “'Poopyhead?'”

Sonata stuck her tongue out. “Oh please. Like I can really compete with you in the potty mouth department.”

“You can at least fukkin' try~”

“Soooooo...” The huge cyborg man looked down at Sonata. “Are we hoisting anchor, orrrrr....?”

“Nah, we're good, Franky.” Sonata patted his side. “You can punch out for the day.”

“Suuuperrr—” And with that, the giant specimen of masculinity vanished in a melting blue mist.

Sonata walked casually through the falling dust of her summon and posed before the other two women. “Sooooooooo... now that we're here....?”

“We wait,” Adagio said. “Like we always do.”

“Sarumaru's not gonna make us sit here forever, is he?” Aria droned.

Adagio gestured. “Look at the totems, ladies~”

Sonata and Aria glanced at their matching necklaces. All three monkey paws were clenched into fists, pulsating rhythmically with a slow-and-steady gold strobe.

“Whatever...” Aria yawned, fumbling through her torn lycra suit for another cigarette. “So long as we get to hit the bars after sunset.”

“The bars???” Sonata's everything drooped. “But I wanna hop on the servers once the Item Shop rotatesssss!”

“The fuck are you even hoping for?” Aria scowled back at her. “A chance to impulse-buy Potassius Peels for the thirteenth goddamn time in a row?!?”

“Isabelle, motherflubber!!!”

“What are you insipid harpies even talking about?!?” Kazan bellowed.

“Christ on a cross...” Adagio face-palmed. “At this rate, his incessant moaning will be heard all the way to Nagasaki.”

“Fuck that.” Aria lit a cigarette while glancing at Sonata. “You still got enough juice in ya?”

“Hey! Big boy!” Sonata leaned over Kazan, eyelashes fluttering. “What's the first hentai pic ever drawn?”

“Hentai pic...?!” Kazan blanched visibly. “What—?”

“BRUHHHH!!!” Sonata spat a blue blob that hovered over Kazan's face, materialized into a woodprint octopus, then landed squarely over his mouth with tentacles gripping tight to the back of his skull.

—“Mrmmmfff-rmmmfffff!!!” Kazan's eyes crossed. Courtesy of the tentacles, he only had his nostrils to breathe through, and he writhed helplessly with the mollusk's added binding to his upper body.

“Now make like a Fisherman's Wife and shut the fluff up!” Sonata Dusk stretched nimbly before rubbing her growling belly. “Leopard's peppers! I could really go for some tempura right about now~”

“I'll pretend not to envy you, girl.” Aria, puffing from a cigarette, wandered over to sit on a partially intact parking brick. Not long after, Adagio Dazzle sat down beside her. “Jee... why don't you make yourself at home...?”

Adagio spoke in a calm, quiet tone. “Would you like to know what I think about today's mission?”

“No.”

Dagi smiled sweetly. “We couldn't have done it without you. More times than I can count, Aria, you came through to save the day with your Quirk. I think it's only fitting to convey how very much I'm proud of you.”

Aria pinched the cigarette in two hands and blew smoke. “Jee. Thanks, Mom.”

“I'm serious.”

“I know you are.” Aria rolled her eyes. “From the very moment you called today's shit a 'mission,' I knew you were wearing your try-hard panties. But we're not at war, Dagi. We've just got a job to do and I expect us to get paid.”

“Well, you're due for payment most of all.”

“Heh...” Aria finished one last puff and grind the cigarette into the concrete below them. “Don't I know it~” Her brow furrowed as she slumped against her knees, hugging herself with a blasé expression. “I feel like a fuckkin' kung fu chauffeur half the goddamn time. Would be pretty friggin' swell to... belch up Dragonquest blobs or shoot lasers out of my cooch like you two.”

“Slimes,” Sonata said from behind.

“Huh?” Aria looked over her shoulder.

“They're not called 'blobs' in Dragonquest. They're called slimes—”

“The fuck does anyone care about th—” Aria waved a harm dramatically. “I just wanna do more than hotwire a sports car by giving it a prostate massage! What if we got a job to do off the shore from Okinawa or some shiet?!”

“You can pilot jet skis...” Sonata blinked. “...can't you?”

“Fuck me with a chainsaw—do you hear that woman?” Aria rolled her eyes. “After your next cup of ramen, consider vomiting us up the Yamato and then we can take on the whole goddamn archipelago.”

“It doesn't work like that!”

“Fine. Eat a bowl of ramen, then.”

“Aria...” Adagio rested a hand on Aria's shoulder. “I get it. You're angry. You feel left out. But we're going to make up for that.”

“Hrmmmmf... like how?”

“Liiiike...” Adagio smirked. “...I especially requested that we receive your Number Two as payment.”

“My... my Number Two...?” Aria blinked more than once. She pointed at the man restrained by bindings and an octopus. “For this?”

“Mmmmhmmm.” Adagio nodded. “I noted your requests and considerations at our last meeting. I have full faith that you'll be the one gifted this time. Maybe even tonight.”

Aria leaned back, kicking her legs out and making lazy trails in the dusty ground. “... … … tonight, huh?”

“Quite possibly. Wouldn't that be fantastic? For you—and the team?”

“Mmmm...” Aria tongued the inside of her mouth, as if bullwhipping a smile further down her cold throat. “Depends.”

“On what?”

“The drawbacks, of course. I bitch a lot—I know—but at least I haven't got them nearly as bad as you and Sona.”

“Eh...” Sonata shrugged, tossing chocolate-covered raisins into her mouth from a secret pocket beneath her lycra suit. “Mrmmmfff... you get used to it.”

“Speaking of which...” Aria gestured towards the back of Adagio's head. “Seems like it's making good time.”

“Hmmm? Oh... you think...?” Adagio ran a hand down her scalp, feeling the length of her orange hair reaching just past her ears and tickling her neck. “It's getting to nearly one inch per hour.”

“Are you doing anything to control that?”

“Not really. I've yet to master the whole... hair management part of my Number Two.” Adagio cleared her throat. “It seems the more that I use the quirk, the less time it takes to grow back. Perhaps I should engage it more often.”

“Yeah, but it's our ace in the hole,” Aria said. Her voice took on a quiet mutter, and she avoided Adagio's direct gaze. “All things considered, I couldn't have aimed the truck at Kazan earlier had you not given him the big One-Two on the mountainside.”

“Why... thank you, Aria...” Adagio smiled. “I'll take that as a compliment.”

“Yeah, well... don't get used to it.” Aria's face returned to a frown. “And you better drop this whole 'team-captain-schtick' soon. It made a bit more sense back in the other world... back when we were completely powerless and struggling to so much as get fooed. But now—?”

“Now... we are still recovering,” Adagio emphasized. “And—for all intents and purposes—I say we've been doing quite swimmingly with me in charge.”

“And you just love to touch yourself at night...” Aria squinted at her. “Thinking about being at the helm of this whole new life we've been living, huh?”

“Would you rather be the one to call the shots instead of me? Hmmm?”

“Pffft...” Aria blew out the side of her mouth. “Fuck that.”

“Heheheh...” Adagio chuckled. “Just as I thought.”

“Uh... guys...?” Sonata's voice lifted in the air—tinged with a bright golden aura. She held her totem up high. The strobe was incessant now, rapid and fluctuating in a way that would make nearby epileptics faint.

“Ah yes.” Aria Blaze stood up. “Monkey rave time.”

“Stuff it,” Adagio grunted. After a brief wince, she continued more delicately: “Please. Allow me the proverbial microphone for this. Things always go far better when I'm the one doing the talking.”

“Yeah, about that...” Sonata stood alongside the other two as a magical wind picked up across the abandoned island, increasing along with the gold pulse of the totems. “Have you thought about using Number One... y'know...”

Adagio blanched. “Against Sarumaru?”

“Gawd...” Aria rolled her eyes. “Why can't she be this assertive in competitive squads...?”

“Even if I was suicidal enough to consider the notion...” Adagio frowned at Sonata. “...do you really think our great benefactor would gift us quirks that could be used against him?”

Sonata let out a sad sigh. “You're right...” She hung her shoulders guiltily. “I guess I'll leave my mouth just for belching...”

“Don't be too sorry, my dear.” Adagio pointed at her with a brief smirk. “Save that vicious cold-bloodedness for when we can all use it.”

“Oh yeah?” Sonata perked up. “And just when will that be?”

“Patience, darlings.” Adagio cracked her neck joint as the three faced a growing cyclone of energy manifesting just beyond Kazan's prone body. “Let us all stock up on our quirks, first.”

“Three is a magical number,” Aria hummed.

“Precisely~” Adagio sang back.

“Shhhh!” Sonata leaned in, eyes wide. “His banana-ness approacheth~”

The fluctuating light source coalesced into a twelve foot tall pillar. Bolts of electricity sparked out from random angles.

Kazan—still wrestling with the summoned octopus that muzzled him—glanced up at the phenomenon with twitching eyes. His pupils shrank as rivulets of fearful sweat ran down his garish skin.

The vertical beam of light turned solid—then unraveled like a massive cotton ball being spread thin across a giant mirror. But instead of fibrous strands, there emerged a dark glossy form. At first, it resembled an orca emerging from cold sea water, and it had the black eyes and polished white teeth to match.

Sonata bit her lip. She touched her gloved fingers together in nervous anticipation.

With a thud thud thud of muscular feet, the mutant creature stepped onto the ruined street of the abandoned island. He was dressed in long cargo pants with weapon bandoleers criss-crossing over his broad pectoral muscles. As if his hulking frame wasn't menacing enough, he carried a high caliber assault rifle that he was keen to wave in the direction of the three sirens and their captured prey.

Just a few seconds later, another figure emerge—just as large if not bigger than the previous. This tall specimen had ghost-white eyeslits crowning a mouth affixed with mantis-like mandibles. A shell-like green torso flexed with hidden muscles, and he kept one gnarled hand resting threateningly on the hilt of a partially-sheathed five-foot long razor-edged masamune sword.

Aria Blaze clenched her teeth hard; she folded her arms in a forced pout to hide any hint of apprehension.

Once the two henchmen took positions, a third figure emerged from the levitating portal. This figure was a paltry five feet, but every one of the sixty inches was dressed to the nines. Expensive leather shoes with an immaculate shine clapped across the cold concrete. Dark silk-smooth pantlegs flapped in the magical breeze. His slender frame was clad in a large, cape-like trenchoat of black cloth with a crimson trim, and it obscured his body into a rigid, triangular shape—almost like a chess figure.

Adagio Dazzle stared intently, fearlessly at the cloaked figure.

He stared back through eerie human eyes. Eerie—for they were set deep within the center of very simian features. The man had the broad cheeks and extended ears of some cross between a chimpanzee and an orangutan, and he had gone through extensive lengths—with decades of practice, no doubt—of slicking and combing his copious amount of chestnut brown ape hair back into a knotted ponytail. Even his sideburns looked well-trimmed, and he bore a serious, deadpan expression of rigid intensity.

His deep bass voice matched all of that and more: “Rarely do the totems lie. And I find that—from all of my contacts in the Field—yours lie the least.”

Adagio shrugged with a proud smile. “Did you just admit that we're your favorites, Sarumaru?”

“Take note that I did not say that they never lie.” Pearl white teeth showed under his inhuman lips. The edges of his trenchcoat flapped red in the breeze, and he tightened his body like a flagpole to keep the banner resolute. “I am keen to do business with you—but I reserve respect for perfection.”

“A noble challenge...” Adagio bowed, and Sonata and Aria followed suit. “...in a world made distinct for its imperfections.”

“As you clearly cling to,” Sarumaru muttered, eyes narrowing. “One of these days you will bow first and speak second when we meet.”

Adagio stood up with a wry smirk. “Now where's the fun in that?”

“Enough prattle.” Sarumaru shrugged one shoulder and his two hulking henchmen took a menacing step forward, gripping their weapons. “Just where is the target? Surely, you do know the consequences of bringing a debtor in lifeless~”

Adagio proudly waved at Kazan's bound figure lying on the ground. “You really think we would ruin our track record?”

“Don't brag yet, off-worlder. I must first inspect my lord's new merchandise...” Sarumaru slowly marched over until he was casting a shadow on Kazan's prone figure. “What in blazes' name is this sea creature doing with his gizzard?”

Sonata winced.

“Ahem...” Adagio smiled earnestly. “Just a useful tool—courtesy of the first quirk you granted the youngest of us.”

“How charming,” the ape-person droned. “Do get rid of it.”

“Zoop~” Sonata Dusk leaned over, snapping a finger.

Glarp! The octopus dissolved as if from a Thanos-snap. Kazan gasped wildly, then sputtered in the shadow of the well-dressed man. “Lord Sarumaru! These blasted harpies—I have no idea what they thought they were doing—!”

“Fulfilling a contract,” Sarumaru's human eyes narrowed over primate lips. “My contract.”

“But Lord—that's impossible! I've paid all my dues!”

“Have you, now...?” Sarumaru shimmied his upper body left and right. His trenchcoat unraveled, revealing a torso clad in a neat red-and-black sleeveless vest. Sleeveless—for Sarumaru was clearly paraplegic underneath the cloak. But where the man lacked in two naturally-attached arms, he possessed a bevy of over two dozen life-sized monkey paws, all fitted into the inner lining of his cloak like a shady watch salesman might bear his illicit goods in a dark alley. “And what of the fire in Sendai? Or the arsons in southern Hokkaido?”

Kazan gritted his razor-sharp teeth. “I haven't the faintest clue—”

“Am I expected to believe the same about the fire that broke out earlier today in Yokohama?” Sarumaru's hairy brow furrowed. “When I gave you these quirks, you promised that you would use them to dispense vigilante justice—as it was your self-proclaimed career dream.”

“And I have, Lord Sarumaru—!!”

“You have been making contracts with the Ashi Clan! The one group my master and I forebade you to even speak with! For the past three months, you've been burning up stores and living spaces for their pathetic insurance fraud schemes!” Sarumaru spat. One by one, the monkey paws inside his cloak clenched into furry fists. “This threatens our territory in this realm and our anonymity! Of all the ways you could have paid back the debt you owe my Master—you chose the most foolish and dishonorable!”

“And that's why you've sent a trio of oversexed valykyries after me—?!?” Kazan's eyes suddenly crossed—“Hrrkkk!!”—for he was at the receiving end of a monkey paw strangling his throat.

“That is why...” One by one, Sarumaru launched the paws at Kazan's body like miniature missiles. They gripped the man's every limb and joint, lifting him effortlessly off the ground in a combined multi-angle choke-hold. “...I hired far more reputable clients to collect both their debt and yours at the same time.” The man's body turned as if he was naturally applying the choke through one of his missing arms. He glared through the forest of floating paws, his eyes reflecting Kazan's suffocating expression. “This was not a bounty hunting job. This was garbage collecting.”

“Wh-what... snrkkkt...” Kazan's eyes rolled back in his head. “...are you... g-going to do... t-to me...?!?”

“What belongs to my Master remains the property of my Master.” Sarumaru flicked his neck. One of his many-many paws let go of Kazan and snapped its flingers.

The portal beside him and his henchmen fluctuated. The two hulking specimens stepped back as tentacles of bright light ribboned between the portal and Kazan's body. Shinji Kazan gasped—and he writhed within the grip of Sarumaru. After mere seconds, any trace of lava, water, or stone elementalism vanished. Kazan's muscular frame shrank, giving way to a trembling waif of a human being with pale skin and balding hair.

“N-no... please...!” Kazan's voice was light as a feather, and tears formed in his bloodshot eyes. “Not m-my quirks...!”

“They were never yours. And now—because of your foolishness—you will never taste of the Master's power again.”

“You... c-can't do this...!”

“Consider the deed done. The agreement, rescinded. And your flesh...?” Sarumaru pivoted, and Kazan did too—levitating in the monkey-paw grip over towards the portal. “...it shall be tossed back like the rubbish it always was... back to the universe from which you came.”

“No! I-I'm a wanted man there!”

“If the only people who want you desire to kill you...” Sarumaru tilted his head back with a disgusted look. “Then let that be the only contract you're competent enough to fulfill.”

“Wait—no no no no no no no no!” Kazan flinched and flailed as—

“BE GONE!!!”

—Sarumaru threw him at full-force into the portal. Shinji Kazan vanished, shrieking.

Silence once more reigned across the abandoned island.

“Mrmmmfff...” Sarumaru let out a long sigh. He drew the multiple floating hands inward so that they orbited him as if he was the nucleus of a monkey atom. “Do forgive the outburst,” he muttered aside to Adagio. One pair of paws straightened his cloak while a few others dusted off his expensive silk vest. “I take great offense at those who bring disappointment to my Master.”

“I only regret that we couldn't bring him to you sooner~” Adagio said with a smile.

“Don't pat yourself that hard on the back,” Sarumaru gave her a bored look. “I would have preferred you three to have not made such a scene in the heart of Shibuya.”

“It was the only way to drag the likes of Kazan out of hiding,” Adagio said. “Your reports were right—he truly can't... … …. couldn't resist the opportunity to intervene on behalf of criminal activity. We didn't even know about what he was doing in Yokohama. Once the totems gave us an indication of his whereabouts, we knew we had to bring a sporting bundle of chaos his way.”

“And you nearly got captured by the Police Force and three pro heroes in the process—”

“But we didn't.” Adagio smiled, finger raised. “Because the fires in Yokohama distracted most of them and the leftover do-gooders who tried to intervene were pure garbage, personified.”

“I do believe you fail to see the consequences you could have suffered for relying so heavily on your improvisational methods—”

“On the contrary—I think we anticipate the reward of a job well done.” Adagio held both hands out. “So how 'bout it?”

Sarumaru bore her a steely-eyed glare.

Aria Blaze and Sonata Dusk both fidgeted, looking between their eldest and the simian quirk-bearer.

The two hulking henchmen noticeably squirmed as the seconds dragged on and—

“Very well.” Sarumaru used two floating hands to adjust the collar of his coat. “I am indeed a man of honor. But it would do you good to not press me into having to prove it.”

“Now why would I need to do a thing such as that...?” Adagio purred.

“You talk too much. And this island smells rank.” Sarumaru briefly resembled a disgruntled chimp in a cage as he looked around at the run-down buildings. “To think that even the legendary Stain resided in places like this...” His hairs stood on end as he shuddered. “So unnerving...”

Adagio squinted, gesturing. “You do remember our last talk about—?”

“Yes yes.” Sarumaru beckoned with three sets of fingers at Aria. “Bring the foul-mouthed one here.”

Aria Blaze shuffled towards him, grumbling. “You think my mouth is dirty, try to imagine my fingers up your—”

“AHEM,” Adagio coughed while Sonata stifled a giggle.

“A very fortuitous thing that you let your elder talk at our meetings.” Sarumaru stood at a fixed space across from Aria on approach. “Now—if you feel what one might interpret as an inappropriate touch, you have my full-assurance that it was a mere coincidence. I have an awful lot of fingers to coordinate, after all...”

“Inappropriate what—??” Aria's eyes widened as eight different paws zoomed in, gripping her tightly by the shoulders, midriff, and thighs. “Whoahhhhhhh-kay!” She squirmed slightly as he was floated in a simian vice towards the portal. “Easy there, monkey's uncle!”

“Silence.” Sarumaru cracked his neck joints as he positioned himself beside her and the glowing anomaly. “And close your eyes. Those who receive the gifts of my Master are not permitted to gaze upon the gift-giving.”

“Yeah-yeah...” Aria huffed, but nevertheless shut her eyes. “I know the drill.”

The two henchmen bowed their heads. Adagio and Sonata quietly stared towards the ground and closed their eyes.

“As I have been informed by your superior,” Sarumaru said. “What you desire most is strength—more than mere utility.”

Aria kept her mouth shut. From where she dangled, she gave a fervent nod.

“Quirks—like most gifts—are well-deserved. But they are even harder to tame. With power there comes discipline, and each tool requires a different grip. If you can't grow enough limbs to carry all that's given to you, then you must learn to be more nimble with that which you've been given.”

Sarumaru gestured like a priest in mid-invocation, posing the remaining hands that floated around him towards the heavens.

“We live in an imperfect world, and nobody is born equal. But—thanks to our Master—we can provide equalizers to all who come here from other earths... with the goal to forge order out of this realm's chaos. Do you accept this challenge... as you and your sisters have accepted the trials before now?”

Once again, Aria Blaze nodded. Sweat formed along her features as she dangled. Waited. Anticipated.

“Then receive this gift—this quirk. Be thankful... but most of all be honorable. For only through honor and hard work can your gratitude be taken seriously. This way alone... will you not end up like the insipid Shinji Kazan.”

There was a loud rippling sound from the portal. Aria flinched only briefly, but soon she locked her limbs in place. The heart was sucked out of the air around her, and in its place came a cold hand—far larger and icier than any of Sarumaru's. When it came into contact with Aria's face, it was big enough to palm her entire forehead. Within seconds, she had to gasp, for a blast of frigid energy rippled through her system, followed by an incomprehensibly bright light.

FLASH!!!