(Ray’s POV)

“And that’s how I… tamed a wolf, a timber wolf.” Twilight and Luna wanted an explanation as to how the hell I managed to befriend Redwood. The looks of disbelief told me that this wasn’t a normal occurrence; that’s funny. Speaking of Redwood, the wooden canine was resting on the table beside me, eying my food. “Here ya go, lad,” I was eating a can of beans I managed to find in one of Twilight’s covers. I had my fill already, so I gave the timber wolf the rest of it. It’s weird knowing that, according to Twilight, timber wolves tend to be hyper aggressive and mean to people. Mine wasn’t a raging maniac that wanted to eat pony flesh, and if I kept it well fed, then Redwood wouldn’t turn out to be like that.

Redwood let out a haunting bark, licked my cheek, and then stuck his snout into the can. “Ray, I need to tell you just… how unheard of something like this is,” Twilight started. “I mean, you did tame a pup, but you still managed to tame a timber wolf! Nopony tried to befriend them for a reason. They’re as unpredictable and as vicious as a wolf, but are more willing to actively hunt us!” Twilight pointed at Redwood. “And you managed to tame one with a piece of candy.” The timber wolf in question let out another bark before turning back to his meal.

“Yeah. Notch said you could turn a wolf into a dog by giving one a bone. So clearly candy turns a feckin’ timber wolf into a timer dog.” I laughed as Twilight’s eye twitched, as did Luna’s. “Who knew that Lego Simulator would be a pretty accurate example of real life in a magical world with talking ponies?”

“Who the hay is Notch?” Twilight asked.

“Some Swedish guy.”

Luna smirked and began to play along. “I must meet this… Notch fellow. He seems like a smart, charming stallion.”

“You wouldn’t, actually. He’s got… an interesting outlook on how people should live their lives. He’a a damn good biologist, though.” Twilight looked ready to shove her hoof through her face at this rate.

“Well, I suppose I shouldn’t pass up the opportunity to study a timber wolf, if Redwood’s willing to be touched by ponies that aren’t you.”

“Well, I’m not a pony, or a Changeling, really. I’m more of a… beetle.” With that, Redwood finished his can of beans, the can itself(what?) and had wandered on over to where Luna and Twilight were sitting. He sniffed at one of them before promptly hopping into Luna’s seat, and leaned on her. “Eureka! That also solves that issue, he’s got the heart of a golden retriever!” Luna began to pet Redwood with a small smile. My adopter and my wooden dog hit it off pretty damn good apparently.

“You know, I’m impressed,” Cadence said. Oh right, she was still here. I kinda felt bad for not noticing; I have a puppy, leave me alone!

“What?”

“Celly’s been in the room the whole time, and you haven’t so much as glared at her this morning,” I slowly turned my head to Princess Celestia, who had been eying my timber wolf the whole time. I shrugged and gestured at my wolf. She was giving it a suspicious glare, which I couldn’t actually get mad at her for. Redwood’s an animal that eats her subjects and actively hunts them; of course she’s going to be a bit on edge with one of these things in the same room as her. Thankfully, she hasn’t attacked my wolf yet, and if she did… well, I can’t really stop her, she was probably capable of killing me in a couple nanoseconds. Let’s just say, if Redwood gets killed by Mother Dearest, then I simply won’t speak to her again

“What can I say? Dogs, back where I’m from, are called ‘Man’s Best Friend’ for a reason. Got that little bugger to play tug of war with my old gym socks, and I plan on buying some toys for him. Redwood’s my… I guess timber dog now, so I’ve been giving him a lot of my focus…” I glanced up at the clock on the wall. It was a solid half hour before I needed to meet up with Ditzy to help her with the mail. “Oi, Luna.” Luna then glanced up from Redwood. The sight was simply hilarious:

Redwood was now lying on his back, belly up, while Luna was out of her chair. She had her hoof on the canine’s belly before she had moved it back onto the ground with a cough.

“Yes Ray?” Luna asked. This is a sight that made me grin like an idiot.

“Well, I was gonna ask if you could look after Redwood for me, but you two clearly aren’t getting along…”

“I’ll look after him, even if I do not like him.” Luna glared at Redwood, who gave an equally convincing glare back, which just looked hilarious given his current situation. “I hate you, timber wolf,” Luna injected. With that, Redwood rolled on his back and licked the old mare on the nose! “That is it. Sister, I am mobilizing the guard, and I am going to burn the Everfree down!” Both me and Princess Celestia chuckled before I slid out of my chair.

“Welp, I’ll be back in a few hours,” I waved at Cadence and Shining Armor. “Yo, if you two head home before I’m back, safe travels!” I then bowed to Princess Celestia. “And I hope you’ll enjoy the train ride back to Canterlot. See you soon, on a very distant day in the next 3 years!” I spun on a dime(still kinda cool that I can do that now), and headed towards the exit to start my day of, possibly questionable, mail delivery.

“Ray?” I turned around after hearing Princess Celestia’s voice.

“I would like to apologize for taking your backpack without your permission. I should have asked you if I could, but I thought you would have been back in Canterlot after you were released from the hospital.” How the fuck did Princess Celestia get over here so quick? She extended her hoof. “You might not be able to see past what I have done to you, and I cannot blame you for that, but can we look past this one mishap?” The solar princess asked.

“Y’know what? It’s pretty petty of me to keep being pissy at you over a backpack. We’ll say this little thing never happened… and maybe one day I can look past that other thing you did. One day, but not today,” I took the Princesses' hoof. It may not be perfect, but at least this lady was taking a good step in the right direction. “Cya around, Celestia,” I turned and went for the door again. Wait, I just… dropped the formal shit. Welp, if I forgive Celestia in a week, then I’ve definitely grown way too soft. This was the same woman that had ruined at least 3 years of my life, and all of a sudden there was a possibility that I could forgive her.

I mean, if I end up going back to Canterlot, then I wouldn’t mind. Redwood and I combined, could probably make the snobbish men of that uptight city, shit themselves in public. It’ll be hilarious… nobody will try to kill my wolf when I’m not looking, right? Well, if somebody does, there will be hell to pay. Anywho, I already made it out of Twilight’s Castle, and began to trot down the street towards mine and Ditzy’s shared mail route.

I coulda sworn I saw a small smile on Celestia’s face before I left the dining room.

(Sting’s POV)

“A caramel latte, with two pumps of low fat goat milk and extra sugar. And a bit of chocolate mixed in.” I ordered from a small cafe. I was in a simple disguise; a brown earth pony with a dark brown mane. While I’m waiting around to find this rogue Changeling, I might as well enjoy myself with some coffee. Back at the Hive, coffee was a myth, a legend. A drink that can not only keep you energized, but also taste pretty good with the right stuff? Count me in! I want some of that in this instance!

It dawned on me that, before entering this cafe, I had no idea what ponies added into their coffee(or how to order coffee to begin with). So I just listened into what most of the ponies in line ordered, and then proceeded to order a weird mix of everything that other customers said. I paid for the drink with bits provided for my mission, and went to wait by the counter for my order. Before I could blink, a nice, steaming cup was given to me, and I was off on my way.

I hobbled out to a table located just outside of the coffee shop, sat down, and began to sip my drink. My heart fluttered a bit when my taste buds tasted this wonderful concoction. Dear Chrysalis, if this is what ponies get to have on a daily basis, then this mission was going to be a piece of cake. All I had to do was act like another drone and drink coffee? Some of the Changelings in the Hive Mind felt what I tasted and asked if I could smuggle some coffee back home after the mission.

Well, that’s another pony to foalnap. I’m going to kidnap one of the ponies that were working in the coffee shop… coffee in exchange for us Changelings not eating them alive… we wouldn’t actually do that, but it does get ponies to cooperate. Seriously, most of us Changelings just want some love for our magic, and some food. We’ll go far for those two things, but killing and eating ponies wouldn’t work… that’s just cruel.

In fact, there’s a few stories of defective Changelings going off and starting families with ponies. They’re terrible stories(why leave the Hive? We have everything anybug could want or need!), but they do sound nice… having love and affection from your spouse, your children, all of that sounded nice. The Hive’s wellbeing and improvement, sounded far, far nicer though. The Hive over the individual, even if I believe what I am doing is wrong, as a Changeling, I follow the orders of the Beautiful, Glorious Queen Chrysalis. For the Hive!

I watched the street vigilantly as ponies walked up and down it, going about their days, and that’s when I caught a glimpse. A Changeling, who was probably 15. Was walking beside a cyan pegasus mare with a cream-colored mane. Both of them had saddle bags which were filled with mail… the drone actually looked happy as he walked beside his presumed friend. There’s my target… and my cup is empty already. Dangit.

“And so, like, this one time, I found myself hanging from a tree. I was completely hungover, and my head was pounding. My ol’ mate was laying flat on the ground beneath me, and had six bottles surrounding him. It turns out we were supposed to be on a camping trip and we got drunk halfway into the first day… Can you cut me down please?” The Changeling was talking with an accent I’ve never heard before, but something I can replicate using magic.

“Ray, how do you come up with those stories?” The pegasus asked.

“I dunno, I just ramble whenever I feel like being an idiot. That story is… kinda based on a true story. Me and my best friend used to get drunk all the time in the woods. Then I… left my Hive.” Wow, this guy sucked at lying, he paused to think of something convincing, which would’ve taken any other Changeling two seconds. Even I can, and I’m not trained to be a scout. So Ray likely wasn’t defective, he’s just useless; a problem for the Hive. After a few hours, both Changeling and pegasus parted ways, and now it was time to strike.

With one Knockout Spell, the teenaged drone was unconscious, and was dragged into an alleyway. Were these ponies blind? I just kidnapped a Changeling, that said ponies seem to like, and nobody bats an eye when he topples onto the ground like that? Wow, these ponies must be lying to this poor fella’s face. That’s what ponies do, they make it seem like they love you and cherish, and then they simply lack the emotions required to care for somebody else beyond the bare minimum. Ponies were just love bags, nothing more. I magicked up my map and started dragging the drone to the rendezvous point.

“Excellent work, Sting,” I knew that voice. Queen Chrysalis was seated at the rendezvous point, which was right outside of the Everfree; nopony would dare get this close to this Chrysalis forsaken forest. I hear it’s so bad in that stupid forest, that even a pony princess could get themselves killed by whatever the heck lived in there. “You know what the remainder of your mission is, go fulfill it. I shall take care of our little prisoner from here.”

I saluted the Queen and shrunk to match the size of the unconscious Changeling, down to the hole positions in his legs(one of the main ways to distinguish drones), and smirked. The Queen nodded, giving her approval of my disguise, and teleported away with Ray, my apparent doppelganger, with her. Good riddance; rogues deserved to be tortured during a long, brutal questioning period by the Queen. I spun around and began making my way to an address that Queen Chrysalis provided during the training for my mission…

Okay, this mission is no longer a piece of cake. The address was a castle, not just any castle, but the renowned Castle of Friendship. I arrived by the time the sun was setting, which surprised me a little. Sweet Carapace, days in the pony world go too fast. Or it's because I now have the Sun to gauge how long the day’s been going on for. I steeled my nerves as I magicked open the doors and waltzed in. This mission really did just get much harder than what I thought it would be, seriously.

This is the home to Twilight Sparkle, who had so easily seen through Queen Chrysalis’s disguise at the invasion, and I was supposed to be living here? Well, depending on how close this princess was with my target, would make things either harder or easier to do. I walked around for a bit, and eventually found a door with a cartoon drawing of a Changeling with Sting ‘Ray’ written out under it. Did these ponies know my… nevermind, my target and I share names. Fortunately, Chrysalis assured me that me and my double act very similarly, and she knows her drones better than her drones know themselves. So if I just act how I do, then I won’t be caught, and the Hive claims another victory against Equestria.

I walked into the room that was now mine, and found a box with a set of cards in it. I quickly looked through the deck and found it kind of weird. Instead of a little artistic design on one side, and a number on the other, each one was labeled with “Uno” and then a number. A few had a couple weird symbols and each card was colored in a certain color with four to choose from. Red, green, blue, and yellow seem to be the main thing. There were a few black cards that I had no idea as to what they meant. What a weird deck of cards… How would you play poker with these?

On the ground in the middle of a room is a sock. It smelled like somebug had been sweating a little in it, and also like something slobbered all over it at the same time. It was also shaped in a really weird way, like it wasn’t designed to fit a pony of Changeling… Why would a Changeling need a sock in this shape? Maybe it was like a stocking that everypony uses for Hearth’s Warming, but that wouldn’t explain the slobber.

“Ray, are you back from doing your mailrun? You’re usually back way earlier…” What was that voice? That didn’t sound like Princess Twilight Sparkle… it sounded a bit like Princess Luna. “I am giving Redwood back to you, he knows you’re back, and wants to see you!” The door swung open, and there she was, the Lunar Princess… This mission just gets harder and harder the deeper I get into this. Like, seriously, why is Princess Luna here? She’ll gut me once she finds out… For the Hive!

“Yeah… sorry about that, your highness. Had a lot of extra mail, y’know how ponies are with the obsessive amount of mail they send to each other.”

“I suppose… Why are you speaking with your accent? You usually suppress it, unless you’re mad and no longer care about your current situation, or you’re telling a joke. Did somepony get mad at you when you delivered their mail?” Princess Luna was radiating… well, emotions of genuine concern. How close was this Princess with my target?

“No Princess, I’m fine. I’m just tired.” The princess raised an eyebrow before shrugging. “I’ll go ahead and hit the hay again, so if you don’t mind…”

“Hold it, you still haven’t gotten your timber wolf back.”

What?

A timber wolf pup hopped and skipped into the room, before stopping dead in its tracks, and it growled at me. I took a step back, fearing what this little monster would do to me. “Uh…” okay, what the actual Hive was this Changeling drone? He had connections with at least two princesses, possibly a third with Princess Celestia, and fourth with Princess Twilight being the sister in law of Princess Cadence. This same drone is a mailpony, has an accent I've never heard before(and nobug in the Hive Mind has heard before), and he has a pet timber wolf? Boy was my work cut out for me, but I will persevere, if not myself but…

… For the Hive!

(Luna’s POV)

I tilted my head for a moment as I watched Ray and Redwood stare each other down. That’s odd, since the two of them were best pals this morning. I walked into these two snuggled up on Ray’s bed last night, and now Redwood hated his owner? It can’t be because Ray left him with me, Redwood was smart enough to comprehend that Ray would be back, and that Ray had something that needed doing. And now Redwood was staring at this new Changeling, like it was his new greatest enemy.

Perhaps it could be with how Ray was acting. Ray’s accent was bolder than usual, but he claims to not be mad. Currently, he’s a shivering mess, and Ray used… ‘everypony’ instead of ‘everyone’. Ray even called me ‘princess’, which he almost never does unless we’re having friendly banter. Or when he hated my guts a couple weeks ago. Was Ray mad at me again? No, that wouldn’t explain the nervous shaking. Also, ‘you’re majesty’ and ‘your highness’ have never, ever left Ray’s mouth even before my sister and I adopted him. Also if Ray were mad at me, he’d be swearing like a sailor in the days of old, when ponies relied on ships to transport resources.

“Uh… hey there, nice timber wolf,” and… okay, something is up.

“Ray, did you hit your head while delivering the mail? How do you not remember your dog’s name…” an idea flickered and I grinned. With my magic, I gathered everypony within the castle, which just included Twilight, Spike, Starlight Glimmer, and even my sister into Ray’s room. All of them blinked before turning to me in confusion. “Everypony, Ray has a card game that he showed me a while ago. I think it’s been a while since we’ve played, so I wanted you all to join.”

I grabbed the deck of Uno cards, the wretched little things, and began to shuffle them with my magic. “I believe my mind is a bit rusty on the rules, but I believe it is seven cards a player.” Everypony took a seat around the coffee table in Ray’s room, and I began to distribute cards until each pony had 7. “Now Ray, what do we do from here?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

“I… uh. I don’t know.”

“How the heck don’t you know how to play this game? Didn’t you manage to beat Luna so much that she declared war on Changelings?” Spike asked.

“To be clear, I got skipped over several times, and then drew 10 cards thanks to Ray’s terrible instructions…” My eyes slowly drifted to Ray with the stink eye. “We take a card from the top of the deck, and begin to play cards.” I did as I said. I know I was being vague with the rules, but there was a reason for this:

Ray would be able to immediately tell me the rules of this game if I forgot. He did manage to teach me and Queen Chrysalis(the damned witch) how to play within 5 minutes of introducing us to Uno. Perhaps once the actual Ray is reclaimed, then he could be a teacher.

“Blue six. You may only play blue cards, or sixes,” I instructed everypony. By Ray's turn, he placed down a skip.

“So what does that do?” He asked. His accent was still as thick as it was when he returned from his job. He scratched his head, awkwardly chuckled. “Do I… go again?”

I then grabbed ‘Ray’ with my magic and slammed him into the nearest wall. His cards left his magical grasp(which looked sturdier than Ray’s normal, stuttery hold), scattering across the room. “Drop the disguise, Changeling. What did you do with Ray?” Everypony looked at me in shock, and Tia then moved to try and get me to let go of the doppelgänger. Even ‘Ray’ looked surprised at my sudden outburst. “You, you stupid foal, have not done your research before kidnapping my friend, have you? If you did, then you’d be so much harder to detect.

“Ray cherishes Uno, as it is one of the few things he has left that reminds him of home. And you expect me to believe you are my Changeling? You have made many mistakes, and your next breath will be your last unless you do two things: undisguise and tell me where the fuck is Ray.” In an instance, the disguise dropped, and the doppelgänger had bright, yellow eyes(probably because he was scared out of his mind. Twilight managed to make a mostly complete color code chart for Changeling eyes), and I could tell he was taller than Ray and a little more physically mature than Ray was. “Go on.”

“I-I don’t know where your stupid Changeling is! Queen Chrysalis took him, and is probably torturing him as we speak!” The false Ray said. I snarled, and slammed the Changeling into the wall.

“Tell me where your Queen is, and I might let you live,” I demanded.

“She's probably back at the Hive by now, but I’m not telling you where that-“ I slammed the Changeling into the wall again, and he must’ve bumped his head; he was knocked out. “Sister, I believe we need to assemble a search party.” I turned to leave the room. “And Twilight, keep our… guest locked up and question him further once he awakens.”

“Luna, wait!” I turned to Celestia.

“We… I don’t think a search party would be very helpful, my sister. Nopony has ever seen the Hive, and those who have likely been killed long before they could spread word of its location. If this imposter has been telling the truth about Ray’s whereabouts, then Ray is long gone, especially if Chrysalis has him. I doubt a Changeling drone could teleport very far without growing tired, but a Changeling Queen can and will be able to teleport great distances without issue. We simply can’t track Ray down.” That… was a good point. “Worry not, I will retrieve Shining Armor, as he can be quite the intimidating interrogator, and when this Changeling wakes up, then he will be questioned.”

“I would like this Changeling beheaded the moment he is no longer useful to us,” I growled.

“Lulu, I know you are upset about Ray’s kidnapping, but we cannot do that. Execution has been put out of practice at least 500 years ago, and is illegal to do now. Especially to foreign citizens. We will keep him imprisoned for a millennium if you’d like.”

“That will do.”

Author's Note

I was originally going to go with a more long-run sorta thing with this little ‘arc’ where it lasts a few chapters. Instead, I’ve got something juicier planned(hopefully it’s interesting).