Okay the automatic quill is up and running? Good? Good. Ahem! How do I start off? Well I guess my human name would be good, I may have gotten it changed but that doesn't mean it has to be left out, a wise man said that I can't leave out the past just because it wasn't good. My name was Daniel Harthing, nerdy name I know, and this is my story of... How I fell for the old Isekai by truck death... Yeah I know I sound like I'm writing a plot for a Manga comic, shut the buck up! Gah! Darn it with this language filter...

Anyways, I was 36 years old when this happened, I was visiting the anime convention in Japan with some of my DND friends when I was on holiday from work. No I won't go into detail of what kind of work... Fine! I was into computer programing and data screening, but only as a five year intern! There, happy!? Sorry I got this... I'll explain later. Continuing on, we were having the time of our lives away from our shitty jobs, taking photos with cosplayers, getting Japanese udon and sweets, even buying merch and some figurines that inspired our dungeon master. It wasn't until we came up to a stand and a character from the legend of Zelda, what was his name? ... Ah Tingle, thank you. It was the guy dressed as Tingle popping up from behind the counter and even asking us in the same voice as him to buy his wares.

"Come on, come on buy whatever you like, it's all here, it's all cheap!" He would exclaim, my friends would say that even though it is cheap they need their money for the hotel we were resting in. Not me though, I had to be different from the mob mentality, so I took the Rimuru Tempest plushie for 5 yen, which by standard US dollars, was barely 4 cents. HA! Literally dirt cheap! After I was satisfied with my purchase and said my thankyous, he had to go all mystical about it. "Trust me on it, you will be satisfied even more." When I turned around to ask why, motherbucker was gone like the wind, POOF! Even his stand was gone! I tell ya, if what happened didn't send me here and I was in the hospital, my friends and I would have laughed our asses off. Sigh, sadly though, it did happen... Whether I liked it or not.

"Come on, if we make it back to the hotel we can drink till we forget that ever happened." The only thought that ran through my mind about it was that I probably gonna have to wash this amorphous plush of my favorite slime character. On the way to the hotel, people were bustling to get everywhere and we just happened by this crosswalk that looked eerily familiar, nobody paid attention, friends included, except for me as the thought was too strong to ignore as I see a kid playing with a little red ball before a black cat just ran out in the middle of the road, and the little girl spotted the cat before running after it while her mother who was on the phone didn't pay attention except for me.

I yelled out to her, well more like screamed out a profanity. "HEY YOU LITTLE SHIT GET OUT OF THE FUCKING ROAD!" Had it worked, that kid would have ran back to her mom, if she learned English. Unfortunately it did not, but it got her Parent's attention as she dropped her phone in shock and ran after her child, which was possibly a big mistake as I looked to the left and there was that speeding devil of a truck hauling ass and hauling a load that commercialized a Japanese counterpart of my little Pony. And my wise thought it was a good idea to run out in the streets, push the two out of the way while using the large plush that was put behind them to lessen the damage, and I would jump out of the way before posing like a bucking superhero. NOPE! Just before I could jump, Truck-kun just happen to be in range to ruin my day along with my internal organs, bones, and my stupid brain that just had to listen to my bucking heart and be a hero. I got hit on the side and sent flying 20... or 30 feet? Not sure, I wasn't counting those numbers.

I swear I could have heard that truck laughing like, "MUAHAHAHAHAHA! GOTCHA BITCH!" And drove off like the maniac that truck was, didn't even consider to stop to say sorry... Asshole. Ooh nice, that went through the filter! Ahem, where was I, Oh yeah, my death. The guys ran over as soon as they could and got me level, all I could feel was pain so that made me groan in even more pain. Jason, my dudgeon master and best friend, yelled at the guys to give me room. "Get back, GET BACK! Alex, call an ambulance!" He kept my head level and held my hand tight to keep me grounded but it wasn't... It didn't work too well as it was keeping me aware of my state of being and all I can do is groan my complaints as all I can do is count the minutes.

"J-Jason, I left so much fucking porn on my computer, you gotta destroy the hard drive dude." It hurts s-so bad, gah this is a deep pain, I hate this pain! I was beginning to hear a robotic voice in my head, which would have been cool if I wasn't dyeing. Request confirmed. Pain resistance calculation online, implementing stab, cut, and bludgeoning resistance... Success, acquisition Searching for owner's hard drive... Failure due to insufficient data, the electrical device cannot be destroyed as it is not in range. Implementing alternate skill as amending measure... Success, now resistant to electrical damage and paralysis. Th-The heat, can't stand the fffffucking heat! Request confirmed. Heat resistance acquisition successful. Damn it shut up, I'm trying to save my energy, which I'm running out of fast, getting so tired. Everything hurts so much, I'm losing allot of blood. Request confirmed, pain nullification implemented, creating body that will not require blood... Success! Implementing skill fatigue resistance Oh would you just shut up Jacey, this is no time for jokes. Getting so cold. Request confirmed, acquiring resistance to heat and cold damage. Success, results to acquiring an new skill, thermal fluctuation resistance acquired and implemented. "Hah hah, gonna f-fucking die, Jason don't tell my folks at home that I died to a fucking My Little pony truck, make it sound awesome. COUGH COUGH COUGH!"

Jason tried to hold back his tears so that he can speak. "I will buddy, anything for you! (Sniff) I just tell them that you were being a dumbass hero in rescuing complete strangers! Just Please, don't leave us! We need our Rogue Paladin! PLEASE!"

"Heheheh- COUGH COUGH! Th-That reminds me, take care of silver fang, that Hellwolf is going to miss me, he may not be able to understand that I'm gone so be sure to feed him." Unique skill acquired, speak with animals, succesful. Shit, should have been more assertive, now I'm gonna die a virgin at 36, can you believe it? If I'm gonna be reborn, I'm gonna hunt down any attractive potential partner I see and give them the ride of their life. I might even work on a tan to be literally red skin. Unique skill acquired, predator has been implemented. Customizing new body for request... Success! Another thing that I remembered, a guy can be a magician if he was still a virgin, maybe if survived to 40 i would have been a great sage equal to heaven like Sun Wukong. Extra skill, Sage, has been successfully acquired. Continuing to evolve skill to unique skill great sage... S-S-S-Successful. Shut up will ya, I need some... Peace and quiet I felt my heartrate slowed, getting colder and colder, and the numbers I counted were the seconds to the minutes. When I got to 5, all I could hear was the crying of my best friends and the sirens of the ambulance who got there too late... Buck that was too sad of a beginning.

The next thing I know, I was falling through the air, not feeling either my hands or feet to balance myself out, hell I couldn't even see! "buuuuuuUUuuuUUUUAAAAAAAAAAACK!" I finally hit rock bottom of whatever I was falling to and felt myself bounce a few times. "OOF! Oww... Wait... That didn't even hurt. I'm not even hurting from the truck hitting me anymore! What the Tartarus!? Tartarus? Why the Buck can't I say- BUCK!? Oh my gods, What has happen to me!? WHERE THE BUCK AM I!?" Aaaaaand end of chapter because screw you sage, I'm tired. This was emotionally exhausting to record.

Author's Note

This took me all night to get done, it's a good start honestly. Maybe I can count this as practice before becoming an actual writer. You can be critical if you want but go easy on me, first time writing.