Extra A/N: there will be material that some may consider NSFW this chapter.

**Baltimare, Equestria**
*002 Summer CC**
**Detective Truth Seeker**

Ah~ there really is something special about being muzzle deep in a mare.

... ... Wait.

Who is this? Where am I? And is this her bed or somepony else's? What's the last thing I remember?

...

... My last memory was getting off on some sweet, sweet stun spells. I thought I gave that up. I really forgot about how good those can feel. At first, they just numb you and everything goes dark. But after a while, after you build up a good tolerance, they start to feel good. Really, really good. Like 'better than rolling around with a mare when you're both in heat' good.

Guess I fell off that wagon... Or got back on it. Whatever.

My old set-up should be back at my house... I just don't know where I parked it. I got some nice things in that wagon. Amongst them, there is an enchanted tool that will cast a stun. All you have to do is position your flank just right and pull a string. Then you're off to Pleasure Town for only-Celestia-knows-how-long. I never actually timed it; but everything slows down, and you feel like you're riding at peak for days.

Whoever this is, she's very fluffy, and it's not just tufts; it's all over fluff. Darker, muted coloration in her coat and tail hairs. Fruity bouquet and... furless wings? Seriously, who is this?

Peeking over the mare's flank and wing, I see her snuggled into the crook of my hind leg and belly with serenity, satisfaction, and some nearly faded scarlet on her cheeks and lips and a bonny sharp tooth accentuating the picture.

Uh~ thinking. Who's the last thestral I met? ... There was one from the station: that solicitor. I still can't believe ponies would provide a lawyer for a stuffed animal.

Can I think of any others? When was the last one I had any interactions with? ... I suppose there was that case a while back when the princess was scheduled to visit the city and bakers started having all manner of confections get replaced with bags of bits.

Buck that case still grinds my gears. No evidence of forced entry anywhere. No hoofprints. No magical residues. No hair follicles of any kind.

I motivated the Chief to get permission from the city council to allow us to mobilize every ponicemare in the city to stakeout every bakery in the city. She wasn't feeling great after dealing with one of the councilmares.

It was the largest mobilization of law enforcement in the city's history. Then, all of a sudden, the crime spree went absolutely cold as a stallion with a headache. Since the victims were compensated, the Chief and council didn't raise a fuss and praised everypony for 'scaring the perpetrator straight.'

Obviously, somepony leaked the information, but at that point there were way too many moving parts in the operation to justify both an internal and an external investigation since the Royal Guard were involved in a reserve capacity. They said the princess herself even checked some of the crime scenes but found babkas.

I have a whole filing cabinet full of cold cases like that, but I did get to talk with two thestrals for the event.

There was also the case of missing clouds. Weather ponies misplaced some 'expensive' vapours, and I had to interview the Night Teams.

Clouds don't leave tracks, and the Baltimare Weather Agency didn't think it was a 'good use of resources' to place tracking spells on their nimbi.

Ugh. I'm still coming down from stuns, and my mind still won't shut up.

... If this is her bed, then she's doing okay for herself as it's made of cloud.

I don't remember the last time I knew a bat pony well enough to wake up like this with her. It's~ kinda nice, actually.

Predawn Remissions- that was her name.

Should I wake her up and get some more snuggling or should I get to work? Ah, that's the best part about being a Detective: everything I do is 'on the clock' as long as I find something to report; so, I can basically work whenever I want. Show up whenever I want. Do whatever I want. Best job ever.

What day even is it?

Maybe I should go on a vacation? I wonder if Predawn would go on a booze cruise with me. She's a solicitor, but she doesn't seem like a 'wet blanket.' . Well, not that kind of wet blanket. Or maybe we could go to Las Pegasus! I haven't had an opportunity to scratch that gambling itch in forever.

Bucking Baltimare doesn't have any casinos. I think Fat Pony is still in charge of the Naughty Club. Bucking mafiosos. Still, she might be able to hook me up with something -something to satisfy that high roller fever- and she owes me one or two.

Now, I hate crime, but I also understand that there is a difference between what most ponies think is 'naughty' and what 'naughty' could become. That's why I keep ponies like Fat Pony around. She's easy to control and doesn't get ideas that would drag this country down and away from Harmony.

Everypony needs some bacteria in their gut to digest food properly and to get sick once in a while to maintain a healthy immune system; every country needs some scum. Otherwise, there is no telling what types would work their way into the pipeline.

More than crime, I hate the dichotomy that I have to maintain. Neither side really understands the dangers of this balancing act either; they don't know how delicate harmony really is or how heavy this burden I bear.

**The Naughty Club, Baltimare Chapter, Baltimare, Equestria**
**Fat Pony**

Working late again. Ambidextrous Pollinator, one of my trusted associates, arrived at this little training meeting late and tossed some crumpled up litter at the receptacle next to the door as she enters.

I stop the meeting and call out to her, "Hey, Polly, the rubbish bin is right there."

"Yeah," she says, "but it's full, and I'm being naughty 'cause of accounts of we're all in the Naughty Club. I thought-"

"-See?" I cut her off, "That's where you messed up, Polly. Tinkin's what I do. Out there, Polly. Naughty is Out. There," and I point to the window to accentuate the matter. Then, I point to the floor of our organization's meeting place. "Not in here."

Her ears fold back, and she drops her gaze, "... I'm sorry, Fat Pony. I'll clean it up."

I say, "Thank you, Polly." It's good to reward corrective behaviour with things like praise or gratitude. Turning to the pony in the room who was speaking before the interruption, "So, Foal Face, finish your story."

"Right, Fat Pony," she says and winds herself back up to get ready for the punchline, "So, she asked for three bits. But I gaves 'er four!"

Wagon Axel, a mare we call, 'Three Hooves,' though nopony quite knows why, because she has all four of the hooves she was born with, excitedly asks about Foal Face's story, "What happened next?"

"Well," Face starts getting dramatic, "I left before she could make change!" Everypony laughs heartily, "Now, she's got an extra bit and no idea what to do with it." I don't laugh. Foal Face notices and straightens up, "B- but don't worry, boss. I took a bits worth of sugar packets from the mare what's with to stock our drink stations at; s- so, it e- evened out."

I give her a nod, and she relaxes.

Tea Mug, who we call, 'Mugsy,' bumped Foal Face on her shoulder, "Oh you were so~ naughty," and then says to the rest of the group, "Listen up, new girls! You listen to Foal Face here, and you'll go far in this organization."

Before we start getting ready to divide up the larger group of recruits for some small group trainings, a pony raises her hand. I call on her, "Whatcha got?"

She asks, "Why not call her names like, 'Blank Flank?'"

Everypony freezes midstep, mid-word. Even Polly stops tying the trash bag. You can hear a pin drop.

With everypony's attention, I slowly and deliberately answer while looking right into her eyes, "There is a line, and dat's crossin' it. We might be naughty, but we. Ain't. Bad. Understood?" She doesn't show the level of understanding that I want, so I add a little more, "Bad ponies go to Tar Tarus." The whole assembly gasped and to everypony, I ask, "Anypony here want that?"

Everypony nods their heads, and the new pony apologizes, "I- I'm s- sorry, Fat Pony." Good. She can be taught. That's a pony I can work with, but I'll need to keep an eye on her. She's probably used language like that before. She'll need to apologize to someponies.

"Eh, fuhget about it," I wave it off. "That's why we have these trainin' meetin's anyways. Am I right?"

Everypony answers, "Yes, Fat Pony."

Another pony clears her throat and also raises a hoof. She is wearing a long brown coat with a fedora, glasses, and has a mustache. Don't see many mares with a mustache. Her mane flutters a bit, and -girl!- is she big.

I give her a good looking up and down and say, "You're a tall drink of water ain't ya? Whadda ya got?"

She speaks in a deep alto, "I was wondering when we can get some of the snacks."

There is a very little pink pony wearing a smaller version of the same getup sitting next to the huge white pony. She looks like she could be a five-year-old filly, but the presence of her own mustache means she's an adult mare. I guess they come in all sizes. Since they both have mustaches, I suppose they are related.

When the bigger one said, 'snacks,' the little one snapped her attention and looked straight at her larger friend.

But I answer the question, "We just finished the 'meet and greet.' Next will be some small group activities and games. Then, we get snacks."

Both new ponies thanked me and started to move towards their small group. The big mare's tail waved. There must be a window open.

"Hey, Polly!" I called.

She answered, "Yes, Fat Pony?"

I said, "Close the windows. Would you?"

"I-" She looked around the room, "I think they are closed, Fat Pony."

I tilt my head, "Are you giving me lip right now?"

"N- no, Fat Pony! I- I'll close'm!" And she ran off to do that. Why do I have to work so hard to get simple things done...

... That big mare's tail is kind of mesmerizing. Flank is nice and meaty, too. A jiggle like that is the sign of solid muscle. A pony could get hurt from two lovely shanks like those.

**The Naughty Club, Baltimare Chapter, Baltimare, Equestria**
**"Unknown" Pony**

Fat Pony finished up, and everypony started to split up into their teams.

Celestia asked me to come along on this 'mission,' but she didn't tell me what we're supposed to be doing.

On our way to our designated group, I elbow her and whisper as loudly and quietly as I can, "Auntie, what are you doing? Are you trying to blow our cover!?"

She whispers back, "I burn a lot of calories. Okay? I can't help it."

"Just keep it together. You have no idea how much manure we're in right now," I'm starting to lose it.

She answers, "Relax. These disguises are tested. Okay? Trust me on this one. Besides, I don't think it's quite as bad as-"

"-how do you know? These are naughty ponies. What if we wake up with cement shoes or- or-?"

"-I don't know what you mean by 'cement shoes,'" she says, "but I've been around the block a few times, Cadence. Just relax, and we'll have a nice evening. Okay? Fat Pony mentioned games, and -I mean- look at those snacks. That's easily the second biggest bowl of banana pudding, I've ever seen!"

**Predawn Remissions' Apartment, Baltimare, Equestria**
**Truth Seeker**

Predawn stirs and mumbles into me, "Truth, if you're going to make out with me, please use my muzzle."

"You don't sound adverse," I say; though, I don't think my pronunciation was on point.
<<"Mm-mm-sn-fhrs-m,">>

She squawks, "D- don't speak right there. Th- the vibrations," and slowly repositions her hind leg gently over my shoulder coos, "But I don't think I've ever awoken better than this." With a blissful yawn, she nuzzles more into the soft of my waist, "I've never made a friend like you before."

Friends. The way ponies use this term is so overarching and fluid. All social interactions are classified as some degree of 'friendship.' The way ponies conduct business is 'friendship.' They way legislators negotiate is 'friendship.' The way the princess rules from her throne is 'friendship.' The way disputes are resolved is 'friendship.' The way herds interact internally and externally is 'friendship.' Snuggling with a pony with your tongue on her sweet spot is 'friendship.'

The various expressions of Love are also 'friendship,' but they're also a separate thing.

Though I'm not clear just how awake or aware she is, Predawn declared her intentions just now.

She doesn't look like she's herded, and I can't smell any other pony on her. Maybe she's married to her job like me?

I've never been the herding type, myself. Mares and stallions alike are always nagging about horseapples and pony feathers, 'You can't do those things around foals,' blah, blah, 'watch your language,' yadda, yadda, 'How legal is that,' la dee dah, 'You put what where!?'

Not like I could ever have any foals myself anyway, and most herds don't want mares like that. A mare who can't reproduce can't contribute to the 'population problem.' To be fair, that is a serious problem, but the stigma for those few like me is also problem -except to the vast majority who can.

Wasn't any different back then, either. Bucking 'city of alicorns.' Same story, different chapter.

Wow, I don't even know how long it's been since I last thought of those plot holes. Yup. My mind is in rare form today.

"Toilet?" I ask as I start working my way out of our entanglement.

"Mm~" She's a little disappointed but points, "Over there."

I place my hoof onto the floor and then it comes up and smacks me in the face. "Hrk." My head starts throbbing.

She sits up fully alert, "A- are you okay?"

My face pressing against the floor, "Y~s, d fl'r jus' c'me 'tta n'wh're," I answer as I work my way back up. Her house could be on a boat. Last I checked, Baltimare was a port city.
<<"Yes, the floor just came out of nowhere.">>

Somehow, I found it despite the hard floor dipping and dodging around. Loud enough for me to hear from the water closet, she says, "I could use some water myself." I guess I forgot to close the door. I'm pretty thirsty, too.

I can hear her continue, "You know, I've never celebrated a case that way before." Case? What case? "Of course, you're aware," I have no idea what she's talking about, "but I think it's self-evident that no pony expected that teddy bear to reject the plea deal."

What!? "Wh- what do you mean?"

"Well," she starts, "she never cooperated. We really hoped she would, but she just remained silent." I can hear her disappointment. "First case I ever really lost." Her voice trails sadly and comes back so that I can hear the smile, "but then I did get to meet you. So, it wasn't quite a loss. Was it?"

I find my way back by following her voice. She's back on the bed. "The sun's up," she says, and I now noticed the blackout curtains, "I'm up, and I don't have to be at the office till dusk."

My increasing heartbeat painfully pounds in my head.

She's the only thing in this place that isn't wobbling around; therefore, she has my attention; and she continues, "Yesterday, you were saying you, 'like fluffy,'" and she bares her whole underside.

I don't remember anything about yesterday; so, I'll have to take her word for it. Being spread out on one's back like that is an incredibly vulnerable position for an equine -especially one with wings- and the gesture is not lost on me.

And she's right: the northern thestral sub-tribe, Eerie, are somewhat husky-esque in their coats. They aren't giant balls of puff, but they can keep warm in deep cool caves quite easily. They are quite the opposite compared to their southern jungle cousin sub-tribe, Equatorial, who have a very short coat of fuzz for hot, humid, and rainy temperatures. Only little baby bunnies are smoother than an Equatorial Thestral, and you can't exactly rub on young lagomorpha quite the same as a big, soft mare.

Some ponies aren't enthusiastic about the shedding that entails with the Eerie Thestrals, but I don't care about that. I just want to get so lost in that furry forest I'll never be found.

Why is my mouth so dry?

"Mm~ by the looks in your eyes, I guess that wasn't just pillow tal-" I couldn't hold back anymore and pounced turning off her seduction and replacing it with some thrilled squeals.

I guess this was a bad week to give up my sexual addiction, but this is one wagon I don't mind getting on. Or is that 'falling off?' I've tried more than once, and everypony I've ever rolled around with seems to like it when I do... until we start missing work... And holidays... And every scheduled time to meet her family... And doctors' appointments... And food... And a daily hygiene regimen.

There's just nothing like a mare: the hard places, the soft places, and everything in between. And thestrals have an abundance of it all. She'll get tired of me eventually -just like that saucy Apple Sauce did- but I'll make sure she enjoys everything until then.

Predawn Remissions, I'm parched like I haven't been in so long, and you have the only thing to slake me.

"T- Truth! How are you even- ah~ d- doing that!? Don't sto-! Oh, buck~"

**Truth Seeker**

Time for work... I think... I should write a note before I go.

Looking at Predawn, I must admit: she does look pretty good all flopped out and showing off my good work from earlier. Her muted purple colors are refreshing despite the grays that all bats seem to have mixed into their palettes. Maybe it wouldn't be too bad to wake up in some pony's arms once in a while. Perhaps I should write that all over this note.

... Paper's not making this easy. Stop moving around, you silly little guy. And where're your friends going? "Hrk." Darn floor. Stay on the ground. You're supposed to be down there not up here.

That's what you are the floor: you're down here, and I'm supposed to be up there.... wherever.... where's up?

... There it is. Up there.

What else should I write? I don't really know where my place is let alone where here is.

She knows where my precinct is located. Should I write about my feelings? ... Nah. Mares don't like it when a mare announces she's a tomcolt with all kinds of feelings so soon like that. Besides, after that bucking, I solidified myself
as a contender for lead mare in this relationship. Doesn't make sense to immediately remove myself from that with a rookie mistake.

Hm~ yeah, this should be fine.

Next time, on Truancy:

"Daddy, I'm pregnant and Bright Mac is the father."
**
"Cadence! So you're the one who shot Shining?"
"No. It was an evil twin."
"Does he even have one of those?"
**
"Princess, I'm pregnant and Celestia is the father."
**
"Well, Twilight, we appear to be at an impasse."
"How do you figure? There is a lot of space. Just go around."
**
"Focus, Silly! I'm pregnant and you're the father."
**
"Then the Chief is going to have to wait for those signatures, Pardon-"
"-no problem, Detective-"
"-because we are going to hunt ourselves... a party pony."
**
"I'm pregnant and I'm the father!?"

Author's Note

Currently Known Vices of Detective Truth Seeker: Hay-cigs, hard cider / cleaning solutions, hallucinating candies, sesual addiction, stunning spells, internal monologuing, gambling, solving mysteries / work, and thrill seeking / parkour. I don't know if we'll ever get to see her Wagon, but she has collection of limited edition items in her Wagon, wherever that is...

I'm curious if anyone might have some ideas to add to this list...

The Naughty Club is something like a 'crime' organization. Our concept of 'crime' is obviously different than that of Equestria's. Equestria's organized crime syndicates are quite dastardly.

Friendship: if I were to make a Venn diagram comparing love and friendship in this Equestria, one would notice that the Elements of Harmony are both strongly interconnected between the two. Indeed, success in friendships and in love would greatly benefit from such things. To quantify it, I'd say that Love is a set of rather special expressions of friendship in Harmony; whereas, Friendship is a broader sense of social interactions. Ponies bathing together, for example, can be either an expression of Love or Friendship. If the ponies are just being nice and helping the other reach places they would normally have some struggles with, then it's just Friendship. Although, it could also be considered a familial or sisterly type of love.