The butterfly effect

And now. Lets resume to what she is to do NOW.

(((for ambience hear this soundtrack while you read the next part of the story: "Silent hill 2-The day of night slowed no rain extended 2 hours)))

Rartiy laid there, next to spike. Her tail curled to her tummy midslection like a little ball of fluff wich she hugged for comfort and also to give her the resove to carry on. But what could she do right now? Yes, she made herself the center of attention thanks to her self muttilation and claims of almost getting raped yet, the rape never happened and the supposed perpetrator was to be none other than Rarity's date the night prior. She winced at that. She cringed at how foolish she was, yeah he was an attractive stalion and had money, so?. Spike is an attractive male, at least he is now, he is the adopted son of celestia herself and has any qualities she could ever desire.

He could play beautiful music, he could cook delightful food, he could give massages that were "top notch" according to applejack since the dear did got a rub or two with his claws... She felt a shiver down her spine. Oh! how the danger of his claws exited her so, even though she knew he could not... hurt a butterfly.

Her mind continues to ramble "also he is incredibly generous even more so for a dragon... that fire ruby he gave me that time...even helped to save me from nightmare moon's parasite... actually come to think of it... where could it be right now? if i am correct i left it..." she was to continue on her rambling until spike interruped

"Rarity, i promise. I promise this time it will all be ok. We WILL the catch the bastard, even if i have to burn down ponyville to do so.This will not... this will not end like with the diamond dogs incident, i promise." Spike said for the first time in all of the night hugging rarity while he cried in silence so he could be comforted, by masking it to be about her.

"Spike..." she whispered. "He...he still blames himself about not being able to rescue me despite me being fine afterwards? even after all this years and... he cannot stop blaming himself?.... oh dear...you.... you... dummy" Rarity thought as she cried in silence tears of joy and sorrow. She felt so happy and yet so sad. Sad that he still felt guilt over not being able to be a hero years ago and Happy that he loved her so much even know that feared to not be enough to protect her and to repeat the trauma of "not being enough".

"Spike, dear. Can i ask you a question or two?". she asked to the void dark that was now the room hoping for answer.

"Anything"

"I just have two questions, dear" and she was not lying. His answer now would either break or make her final push to do what she "needed" to do.

"But, before anything. Let me apologize, Im sorry truly. I...I never thought of your feelings when i... when i planned that date..."

"Its fine" Spike said blankly, he did not want to dwell on it, not anymore.

"If it was then, why were you crying that night in the castle?"

"you saw... didnt you?" spike said in a very surprised whisper and stopped his hug now, turned to the side with his whole body to avoid looking at her or visceversa out of mixed feelings.

"Yes, actually more like i was forced to. That night i saw this beatiful butterfly black like night sky were her wings, and white was her body it was just so... mesmerizing that after my uhh disastrous.... "Date" i followed it to calm myself, and that led me directly to the castle".

"Your "date" you mean..." he stopped himself with a gasp as he realized what he was about to say not daring to potentially hurt her or recall her her almost rape situation with the stallion. Altough in reality it never happened.

He remained Quiet after that.

"Yes" she simply said.

"Its funny actually. We both were crying" that much was true "and yet... when i tried to escape the pain i just tried to distract myself, i followed beauty and..." she looked at his back with tears in her eyes "and... it led me to you"

Spike stayed silent.

"But now you feel so distant" she continued

Spike didnt want to respond.

"Its like ever since that night i... can see myself again... following that butterfly but instead of the butterfly i see you" she didnt want to shut up now.

No sound was made still from spike.

"But i cant catch you. You fly further and further and i keep trying to follow in the cold night while you fly to a light in the city, a light i cant reach and it... it feels... so... so lonely". She concluded.

"Beautiful poem really, but where are you going with this" he stammered scared the posibility was getting in his head.

"Those were the thoughts and feelings that came to me last night. Last night after my "date" ended in tears, and i followed the butterfly straight to your.... your crying yet dignified shadow." Then she let out a nervous and pained laugh, a laugh at her former self expense. "and then i realized just then, like a boulder fell on my head, the realization all at once. I knew then that exact feeling i felt was what you must felt all those years while i... just kept you at foreleg distance" she ended with a deep inhale as to recover her emotionally drainining explanation

"Rarity i... i dont know what to..."

"I havent finished, dear. Now for first question: "do you still love me?" she dropped a bomb

He gasped as his whole body shivered in a mixture of uncertainty, surprise and fear. "Why... are you asking this... why now?" he didnt understand.

"Because... Because now i see you. I actually see you. I See just..." she started to get closer to him looking into his eyes that now looked back at her trying to comprehend the situation. "What should i always have and never did. But now all i can grasp is..." she reached a foreleg to touch his maw but he backed off a little "all i can grasp is... nothing. Have i seen it sooner perhaps i could still..." Rarity looked into her hoof in thought and melancholy.

Spike just turned his back again and just said "Yes, i do" plainly.

Rarity gaspped and felt like life was entering her body but... "however not like before and besides even if wanted to be with you or liked you like i used to.. i cannot do it now. Créame she... she makes me happy and... i will not break her trust, its jut not right. Im sorry" Rarity felt like she had been thrown a cold bucket of watter directly to her heart and fell down to the bed sad and hurt.

"...i see. then for my final question: What did you love about me? and... why did you continue despite everything that happened all this years?" she needed to know. This will make or brake it.

"everything" he said simply.

"huh?" she was not prepared for this. She just let him explain further.

"Everything. Every single hair in your mane, every single smile you gave me, every single gem with dug together, every single dress you made, every single hour we spent together, every single time i looked at your eyes, your beautiful eyes that would make me tremble in happiness. Every single sniff of your perfume, every single mannerism you had, every single time i heard your voice, it just... calmed me. Like i said i could on all night but... the point is the same it was... everything, every single thing about you but one thing." he ended the answert to the first question.

"But one thing?" she asked in tears of hapiness and regret ¿how could she have been so blind?

"Yes. and that thing is part of the answer of your final question. The only thing i hated or rather hurted me from you was.... just how you would always go find love somewhere else and leave me alone, how you would claim i was a perfect "gentle drake" and not even consider the fact that i existed and that i loved you too. I hated most of all how even after i finally got "legal" 2 years ago you still did not look for me, you did not... even had me as real option. And how did i endure all this years?, well to be simple because love was stronger than my pain, and time was insignificant or at least i thought so at the time, afterall i was blinded by love. But then, yesterday i... could not take it anymore. To think that you went as far as not even taking a break from "dating stalions" in my birthday despite you KNOWING i loved you was... painful and the glass of my tolerance was filled. I mean, if you could not just... think of me... on my birthday is...*sigh* i dont know how to explain it but i just could not take it anymore.

"I see...thank you for your honesty, dear." She said in a barely audible whisper so he could not hear her sob.

"Well, its late so... we must sleep we have a busy day tomorrow afterall" he concluded

"Yes, dear" she answered

"Goodnight" both said simply.

Rarity however could not sleep and would not sleep, not afterall she felt before and what she heard now. Her determination was set in stone and after some minutes and spike fell asleep Rarity finally took action.

"Im very sorry dear, but... just this... just with you... if god can hear me... i beg your forgiveness but him i.... just cant let him go... just in him i will be greedy, just this once. Im sorry spike for everything.... but this time i... i will do it right" she whispered to herself and her sleeping beauty drake and so with tears running through her eyes she put her horn to his head and Casted a spell...