To Soothe the Neurotic Beast

Fluttershy sat by herself in Luna's richly appointed receiving room inside Canterlot Castle, surrounded by dark wooden furniture, silver accents, dim candlelight, and night-blue walls.

Rarity had offered to come, but Fluttershy had declined, grateful though she was for it. She knew that Rarity was working on a big order at the moment, and couldn't afford the day trip—not really.

As she sat by herself in the large room, deep inside Canterlot Palace, waiting for what she presumed was a personal audience with the princess, she was beginning to reconsider that decision.

A trio of comfortable sofas made of a silvery-blue wood and covered with black cushions surrounded a coffee table made of the same wood. A single tall, black candle adorned the table. It was lit, but appeared to produce no smoke, and the flame it gave off had an odd, silvery tint. The solitary candle flame also appeared to illuminate much more of the room than should have been possible, despite its apparent dimness.

Fluttershy was seated on the sofa facing away from the entrance, and fidgeting with her forehooves. Along the left wall was a low cabinet that smoothly merged with a counter, and ended in an ornate sink. The room had two doors—she had come in by the one behind her. The other one was on the opposite wall, and she'd spent the last several minutes waiting, wondering what was behind it. Luna's bedroom? An elaborate mazelike labyrinth for those who displeased the princess? A laboratory?

It occurred to Fluttershy that she didn't really know much about Luna. She moved the moon. She liked stars. She was very old, but didn't act much like it, except for those times that she did. She was Celestia's younger sister. She had briefly threatened Fluttershy's life while possessed (had she been possessed? Fluttershy was still unclear on the precise nature of this) by the Nightmare.

She began coiling the hair of her tail around her forehoof, then letting it fall away. Coil. Release. Coil. Release.

Upon approaching Canterlot Castle, and being asked her business by a royal guard, she had given her name, and told the guardsmare that she was here hoping to see Princess Luna, um, if that was all right with her.

The guard had asked no further questions, had simply escorted her politely, but efficiently, to the room she was in now. She had been informed that it was Princess Luna's Receiving Room, and that The Princess Would Be With Her Shortly. The guard had then left.

By her estimation, it had been about ten minutes since. In truth, she was slightly puzzled. She had expected that simply showing up unannounced, she should have had to wait in some kind of public queue, or submit a request, or... something. Perhaps this was simply how Luna chose to deal with ponies bold and foolish enough to demand her time—they got escorted to a room that seemed... Luna-themed, for lack of a better term. Then, they got left alone until they got bored and went home.

It wasn't as though she was somepony important, after all. She could hardly expect a princessto just drop everything to meet with her. Well, she would wait for a while longer, and hope that her decoy-receiving-room theory was wrong.

Coil. Release.

Coil. Release.

Coil.

Release.

Coil. Door slamming open.

Fluttershy leapt into the air, and with the aid of her panicked wingbeats, found herself clinging to a rafter protruding from the ceiling.

From below her, came a regal voice. "Apologies for Our tardiness, friend Fluttershy! We were unavoidably held up by—" The voice paused abruptly, then continued in a far less regal, significantly more confused tone, "...friend Fluttershy? My guards informed me that you had appeared seeking an audience. Hello?"

"Up. U-u-up. I'm up, here," Fluttershy squeaked.

Beneath her, Princess Luna blinked, and looked up. "Oh. Dear. I, er. Allow me to help you down."

Fluttershy stiffened, then relaxed as she was enveloped in the cool light of Princess Luna's magic aura. It gently plucked her from the ceiling, and set her on the sofa she had been sitting on.

"My sincerest apologies, Dame Fluttershy," Luna said, sounding abashed, some of her earlier formality making a reappearance. She shut the door behind her, and trotted over to the cabinet along the left wall. "I have spent the evening thus far tolerating those nobles who have recently realized that I host a Night Court at all, and assume that I will be easier to hoodwink than my sister. I suppose I was a touch enthusiastic for this distraction."

Fluttershy frowned at 'Dame', and made a note to ask Rarity later. She would know. "Oh. Um, that's all right. I wasn't really expecting... well, anything, actually." Fluttershy chewed on her lip. "I just came up to Canterlot and hoped I'd be able to see you. I guess it was kind of silly to come here without an, um, appointment, or reservation. I'm sorry for interrupting."

Luna opened the cabinet door, and rattled around inside for a moment before withdrawing a kettle, what appeared to be an oddly-shaped glass pitcher, several mugs, a small burlap bag, and several ceramic pitchers. "Not at all, I was pleased for the interruption." She turned to face Fluttershy directly, and continued, "Know that I always have time for you, and for your friends. I shall always be in your debt, and gratefully so. My attention is the least of treasures that I may offer in recompense."

She turned away and began fussing with the kettle and the strange glass pitcher. Fluttershy blinked. "Oh. I see. Er. If I had just been some other pony, how would I have come to see you?"

Luna filled the kettle with water and set it atop a small metal plate, and then wrapped the metal plate in her magic. "You would have been directed to the public queue. There is one for both sister's Day Court, and my Night Court. Any pony is free to join either of them. If Court ends before a pony is heard, their position in the queue is noted, and they are invited to join the next day at that same position."

The princess peered over her shoulder at Fluttershy. "May I offer you a drink? I am making coffee for mine own self, but tea would be no trouble. There is also water, and hot chocolate."

The kettle began to whistle, and Luna's magic withdrew from around the plate. As she removed the top from the glass pitcher, Fluttershy noticed it was attached to a plunger that ran its length. Luna withdrew the entire thing, set it aside, and spooned in several heaps of a dark, grainy substance into the glass pitcher. She then filled the pitcher with steaming water from the kettle, then replaced the plunger-top. Curiously, she was careful to pull the plunger up before replacing the top, leaving it sticking into the air.

"Friend Fluttershy?"

Fluttershy startled. Oh no, Luna was looking at her! How long had she been staring? "Oh! Um, I'm sorry, I was watching what you were doing. Just water is fine for me, please."

"Of course. It will take several minutes for this coffee to brew properly in any case." She whisked a clear glass etched with a crescent moon motif out of the cabinet, alongside a blue-tinted glass pitcher filled with clear water and chips of clinking ice.

She swiftly transferred water to glass, then floated the glass over to the table in front of Fluttershy. It settled onto the table without spilling a drop, and Luna turned to Fluttershy.

Fluttershy stared at Luna for a moment, before turning to the glass. She picked it up and took a sip. Then she turned back to Luna.

"So." Luna began.

Fluttershy swallowed. "Um."

Fluttershy took another sip of her water. It was good. Very refreshing, no aftertaste. "I'm, um."

For all her fretting and worrying, she had completely failed to consider what exactly she was going to say to Luna. She had an idea of the general shape of the questions she wanted to ask, but confronted with the lunar princess herself, she was struggling to put it into words.

"Yes?" prompted Luna.

She might as well begin at the beginning. "I'm... here to ask you a question. Ah. Probably more than just one. About, um, about Twilight."

Luna cocked her head, bundled up her plunger-pitcher, a mug, and a small ceramic creamer full of milk, and brought them all to the table, and took a seat across from Fluttershy. "Oh? Is aught amiss with Equestria's newest princess?"

"Well. We're pretty sure she isn't in any kind of danger. I guess I should start with that. But." She stopped, unsure how to continue.

Luna took hold of the plunger-pitcher, eyed it critically for a moment, then nodded to herself, and slowly depressed the plunger. A plate inside the pitcher at the end of the plunger pressed downward, trapping the grains at the bottom, while allowing all the water—now stained a deep, rich brown—to pass through into the upper chamber. She then poured the concoction into her mug and added a splash of milk. After a bit of stirring, the beverage turned an appetizing, creamy brown, and gave off a rich, earthy scent.

"But?" Luna finally suggested.

Fluttershy took another sip of water, and took a moment. She had to remember that she was here for Twilight's sake. She needed information. She needed to make sure they didn't hurt their friend. That was what mattered here—not her own discomfort, or her own awkwardness. She took a deep breath, closed her eyes, and breathed out.

"Okay. Right. We noticed that Twilight was behaving strangely a few weeks ago. Her attention would... wander. Even during things that she normally gave her full attention to. Sometimes, she would turn very red, excuse herself, and vanish. And I mean that literally, she would teleport away. Usually in the middle of doing something else."

Luna frowned. "Without so much as a by-your-leave? That sounds rather out of character for Twilight Sparkle. She is quite scrupulous about politeness and social niceties, at least when not preoccupied by some matter of great import."

"We thought the same thing," Fluttershy said, nodding. "Rarity and the others noticed before I did, and tried to speak to Twilight about it, but she kept dodging their questions. I, um, noticed too, and started noticing patterns." Fluttershy decided not to explain that she had been working alone, or why.

She continued, "I noticed that when she teleported away, it wasn't just herself that her magic was interacting with. And the biggest clue was that, just once, I noticed a particular, very... um. Specific smell."

Luna's eyes widened and she drank her coffee. "I fear I know where this leads. Go on."

Fluttershy mentally reviewed the events of yesterday's morning, and immediately decided to give Luna only the barest essentials. And even those would be embarrassing.

"I. Well. I invited Twilight to come with me while I helped some critters out in the woods. And I dressed kind of—" was as far as she got before her nerve failed her. She closed her eyes, took another sip of water, swallowed heavily, and took a deep breath. Then, she continued, "Provocatively," she squeaked.

Luna covered her mouth with one hoof. "Oh?"

"Then I ended up with my head poked into a chipmunk's burrow, with my—my bottom sticking up."

It was hard to tell behind the hoof, but Fluttershy thought she saw Luna's smile grow. "Oh."

"And then I asked Twilight to come closer in case I needed help getting back out."

Luna's eyebrows rose, and almost disappeared into her starry hairline. "Indeed?"

"And while I was waiting, I was sort of swishing my tail back and forth."

The corners of Luna's mouth began quivering. "Oh my."

"And as I was coming back out, I sort of wiggled back and forth."

There was a bright gleam in Luna's eyes, and she carefully set her mug down. "Did you now."

"And then Twilight orgasmed on me, and teleported away and I tasted it and it was definitely semen," Fluttershy said, all in a rush, desperate to be done.

Luna barked a single shocked laugh, then covered her mouth with both hooves and turned away. Her shoulders shook with silent laughter for several moments, before she took a deep breath and turned back toward Fluttershy, composed once more. The twitching at the corners of her mouth gave her away, but her voice was remarkably steady. "I take it that you have deduced that your friend now has, to be blunt, a penis?"

Fluttershy nodded rapidly, unable to meet Luna's eyes.

Luna began, was overtaken by a storm of giggles, then marshalled herself. "I assure you that I am not laughing at you or your predicament, Fluttershy. Merely the absurdity of the situation you found yourself in, and the rather... comical nature of the outcome, particularly accidental as it was."

Fluttershy looked up, wearing a tiny, shy smile. "I guess it was kind of silly, wasn't it?"

Another fit of giggles overtook Luna, and this time Fluttershy found the strength to join her. "'Twas! 'Twas indeed."

They lapsed into silence for a moment. Luna refilled her mug with fresh coffee, and added another dash of milk. Fluttershy sipped her water, and sighed.

"So," Fluttershy said eventually, "I guess that's why I'm here. We're pretty sure Twilight has a penis. We're pretty sure it's a recent development. We think it has something to do with her alicorn transformation. And we don't really know how to help her."

Fluttershy really really hoped their "alicorn transformation" theory was correct. If it wasn't, she had just embarrassed her friend to one of the rulers of the nation, and made herself look foolish. While she knew that Luna could keep a secret, she didn't like talking about her friends' personal problems behind their backs. Especially something as clearly sensitive as this.

"Allow me to dispel some of your confusion, then," Luna said. "First, it is indeed a result of her ascension. As beings chosen by Harmony itself, we are meant to embody all of ponykind—all tribes, all sexes. We are meant to represent the best attributes of ponies everywhere." She paused. "Or... that has been the theory that Celestia and I have been working from. It is not as though we were given a manual." She shrugged.

"To the more salient point—that of young Twilight Sparkle's shame—I believe it is here that both my sister and I have erred. I was under the impression that my sister had spoken with young Twilight about this. And indeed, perhaps she has. But it has been a very long time since either of us has experienced what Twilight now undergoes. Perhaps she had simply forgotten how powerful, and strange—and even frightening—the sensations were."

"Oh no!" Fluttershy said, looking up from above her glass, "Is she in pain?"

Luna smiled. "Your concern does you credit, but she is in no more pain or discomfort than any teenaged colt, as my sister and I eventually discovered. The conversations required to make that discovery are not something I would wish upon anypony. I will ask my sister to write to Twilight Sparkle, and share what we know, and damn any prudish sense of propriety. However, there is one thing that concerns me..." She frowned thoughtfully, and turned away.

"What is it?" Fluttershy hoped it wasn't anything serious.

"When you were in the woods together," Luna said, "you did not touch Twilight at any point before she climaxed, correct?"

Fluttershy blushed, but nodded.

"And this is not the first time you have borne witness to such behavior? "

Another nod. "I think that she, um, 'cleans up' when she teleports away, and hides the cleanup spell as part of her teleport. That's why there's never any... 'evidence'. Except this last time, when it was on... well, me."

Luna nodded. "It is not so much the 'cleanup' that troubles me, but the fact that Twilight Sparkle is able to reach any degree of climax without any apparent physical stimulation. That speaks to a mare who is, to put it quite bluntly, sexually frustrated to an extreme. She is experiencing overwhelming sensations, and if she is this sensitive, it is clear that she is not addressing them."

Fluttershy frowned. "Why is it that all of this is only happening now? Her transformation happened a while ago."

"I cannot say for certain, but it was the same for my sister and myself. Perhaps it simply takes some time for the new hormones to build up to the point that their effects can be felt. We also discovered that once the effects began, they were quite powerful. If Twilight Sparkle is not relieving them with at least some regularity, she is—as I said—likely in some discomfort." Luna's mouth turned down in displeasure, and she shifted in her seat. "While I do not believe there is any physical danger to her, it is not healthy to deny oneself for so long."

Fluttershy frowned and peered down into her glass. The ice had all melted, and condensation had gathered on the outside. "And she must be so anxious... always uncomfortable, always worried about embarrassing herself... oh, goodness. Oh, is there anything we can do for her?" She looked up at Luna, her eyes wide, wings slightly spread.

Luna bobbed her head from side to side. "I imagine that simply giving her somepony to confide in would be a great boon to her. And of course, there is always the matter of... well..." She trailed off.

"Yes?" Fluttershy leaned forward, wings spreading wide. "Please, princess! I feel just awful for her!"

Luna coughed and looked away. "There is the matter of helping her ah, find relief in a more 'hooves-on' manner." She turned to face Fluttershy directly. "Sexually."

Fluttershy had blushed so much this week, that she was beginning to feel like she could do a credible impression of a tomato. But this blush outdid all the rest. All of the other blushes had been mere practice runs. With this one, she could practically feel steam coming out of her ears, and she was certain that every single inch of her body was as red as it could get.

"M!" She said.

"M-m-m-m-mm!" She tried again.

"M.... me?" She finally managed to squeak out.

Luna smiled, and shrugged slightly. "You, or somepony else she trusts. But you are close to her, and I believe that your recent experience made it clear that she finds you appealing. What she truly needs most is to find safety and acceptance. But with the strength of her urges, it strikes me as quite likely that physical satisfaction will be a large part of that acceptance. If you seek to help her, you must prepare for that likelihood."

Luna peered closely at Fluttershy for a moment, then drained her mug and set it down. "You are by no means obliged to do as I have recommended. You are better acquainted with young Twilight than I. You must trust your own judgement in this, and I urge you not to simply substitute mine. But if you do as I advise, I strongly suggest you pay a visit to my personal apothecary. He is quite capable, and very circumspect."

A pad of paper and a quill whizzed over to the table, carried by Luna's magic. She scribbled onto the paper for a few moments, then tore it off. Her magic flared for a moment, and when it faded, the bottom of the page was stamped with her cutie mark. She passed the paper to Fluttershy. "This will explain your situation. It also contains a recommendation for several things I believe you will need. And please ask the apothecary any questions you have—Stout Tincture is quite happy to explain anything and everything alchemical.

"And rest assured, that I shall ensure that Twilight Sparkle receives a letter from Celestia or myself that more completely explains her situation. She is owed no less."

Fluttershy's mind was spinning. "Um. Okay. Where, um. Um. Where do I, uh, go?" She looked helplessly down at the note she was clutching.

Luna's sharp gaze softened, and she reached a wing across the table and placed it on Fluttershy's shoulder. "Please recall, Fluttershy, that you are under no obligation to do as I have said, if you are at all uncomfortable."

Fluttershy closed her eyes and spent several moments taking deep breaths until her heart ceased humming like a caged bird.

She imagined Twilight, alone, afraid, pent-up. Afraid to go out and be with her friends, but terrified to be alone with powerful new sensations she had no idea how to manage. Her heart ached as she imagined Twilight fleeing after how briefly-wonderful their walk had been yesterday.

She recalled the look that she had seen, ever so fleetingly, upon Twilight's face as she stood upon the hillock yesterday, framed by sunlight. The look of rapture, of desire.

She imagined holding Twilight between her wings, murmuring sweet reassurances into her ear, helping her to find her courage once more.

She imagined laying on her front as Twilight held her down and grunted into her ear. Imagined feeling Twilight's weight atop her as an insistent pressure pooled in her innermost depths, and she lay pinned, helpless, wanted...

She opened her eyes. Her breathing was even, and her voice steady.

"No. I want to do it. Where's the apothecary, please?"