As ever brief that this visit to Chrysalis’s kingdom, the Southern Badlands Hive, it was kinda fun. Chrysalis said we had to leave back for Canterlot tomorrow morning, but that didn’t mean I had to stop by wherever Thorax was hanging out, to hang out with him. It just seemed like a good thing to do since I got no idea as to when I’ll be seeing my new changeling friend again. So here I am, sitting next to Thorax, just idly sitting around and doing nothing. At least until Chrysalis comes and demands to cuddle with me.

I am powerless in stopping Chrysalis snuggles, okay? Chrysalis is very warm and cuddly.

Well, Thorax was feasting on the ‘friendship’ feeling, since I can kinda feel a bit of my soul being nibbled on. I don’t know why I didn’t connect the dots, but changelings mostly(if not only) eat emotions, and need the nutrients from said emotions to live. Positive emotions such as love seem to be the more nutritious, if not magically delicious emotions that changelings like to feed on. So in a sense, I was feeding both my girlfriend(or marefriend? I forget), and now my new friend.

I hope I’m also giving off enough positive emotions for my escorts to feed off. I’ve no clue how the emotional feeding worked, but I hope it works in the way I think it does, where multiple changelist can consume the emotions of one pony without harming them. Mostly because Skitter and Scatter looked kinda bored, just standing around and doing nothing.

“Y’know, you two could go wander off. I doubt any changeling will try to hurt me.”

“Noling would, sir. You’ve got the Queen’s scent markings on you; you’re off limits,” Skitter said. “And while you may not have fully followed along with the tour myself and my sister had prepared for you, it is an honor to be escorting the Queen’s consort,” he added.

“But…”

“Trust me, Fruit, it’s a changeling’s dream to simply help out the Hive and the Hive’s Queen. When you said Coaxa was… useless to the Hive, you quite heavily hurt his pride by doing that; saying you’re worthless to the Hive is the greatest insult a changeling could receive. For us ‘lings, the Hive, along with the Queen’s orders, are first and foremost… which is why Skitter and Scatter won’t go do something else. Even if you ask them to…” Thorax chuckled. “I’m not much different from Coaxa, am I? I’m pretty useless to my Hive; I can’t do anything right.”

Scatter finally decided to speak up. “There is a clear difference, Thorax. Coaxa was merely a bully, keeping drones like yourself down in the dirt instead of helping you improve, or allowing you to find something you’re good at. You at least try to help out, we don’t know what position you’re good at yet, but you’re pretty young,” she said with a small little… Oh.

Scatter might have a crush on Thorax. I could see that little shine she has in her eyes while speaking to the drone before her.

“B-but you and Skitter found your place already, and you’re as old as I am!”

“That’s simply because we are good at fighting…”

“You could be an emotional support changeling,” I suggested. All three changelings snorted. “What? It would actually be really helpful. I mean, Thorax can be like a therapist; someling you vent your frustrations to, who will keep your frustrations top secret, and will help you through whatever emotional strife you may be feeling at the time.” I shrugged. “I know the Hive above all, but your mental health also matters.”

“Well, we already do have emotional therapy drones, so you could give that a shot, Thorax,” Skitter suggested. “Because despite how you only get recognition in the Hive through combat skill, the real heroes are those ‘emotional support drones’. Some experiences while scouting can be… traumatic to say the least.” Skitter shivered.

I then had a thought.

“Hey Thorax,” the drone looked up at me, and cocked his head to the side. God dammit, you adorable bughorse, you need to stop being cute… Know what? This thought works out. I slowly tipped the drone over, until Thorax was eventually laying on his side. There was next to no resistance from my friend, as he just silently went about what I was doing. “Not afraid that I’ve got you in a pretty vulnerable position?”

“I can taste your intent. If you wanted to hurt me, I probably couldn’t stop you, but I would know if you wanted to hurt me,” Thorax explained.

“So…” I started rubbing Thorax’s belly, and like a dog, the changeling rolled fully on his back, panting, tongue hanging out the side of his mouth. Holy shit, my thought is actually paying off! Holy fucking shit, changeling drones like belly rubs! I grinned as Thorax started to do a little leg kicky thing… These guys were just big, big, bug horse dogs, and I love them.

“That feels so good- hey why’d you stop?” Thorax looked up at me like a puppy that somepony had just kicked.

“Well…” Maybe I shouldn’t have done this in a more ‘public’ section of the Hive. “There’s a line of changelings behind you.” Low and behold, a nice long line of changelings were lined up. Chrysalis was sitting off to the side, forelegs crossed, smugly grinning at me. The kind of face that screamed. “You did this to yourself.”

“C’mon Thorax! You’re holding up the line!”

“But… this is my belly rubbing pony!” Thorax protested.

“Isn’t Fruit Chrysalis’s pet pony?” One of the drones in the line asked.

Wait, pet pony? What the fuck have you been telling your drones, Chryssy? And why am I okay with being called that?

“I shall allow all of you to lease Fruit Punch’s services. Now one at a time! There is only one Fruit Punch to go around!” Chrysalis, why?

Okay, so now I’m sitting in a pile of changelings, all of which were trying to get cuddled up next to me, with Skitter, Scatter, and Thorax being the closest to me. The first two, mainly Skitter, had been wide awake, keeping watch over me. Scatter on the other hand, is currently drooling on me and knocked out. Occasionally a drone’s leg would twitch from the belly rubbing sessions I had given them. Apparently physical contact could be used to feed drones love. And I love petting creatures that could rip my throat out at a moment's notice…

All these changelings, except for Skitter, were in a food coma.

Sitting in front of the Changeling pile, Chrysalis and, I think Pharynx, were sitting. Pharynx looked disgusted at the physical affection I had just displayed for just about every drone in the Hive, while Chrysalis was a little teary eyed. I knew why, and it was kinda cute, and kinda relieving. Every drone in this pile of at least a hundred drones had accepted me, and were perfectly happy with keeping me.

Also, I almost got myself claimed by another female drone, but Chryssy already scent marked me. So now the female drone is near the bottom of the pile, sleeping with resting, pouty, bug horse face.

“Your highness, I get that your new little coltfriend has won the whole Hive over at this point, but don’t you think we should move these drones to some sleeping chambers at least? It would be safer for the Hive as a whole-“

“Worry not, with myself and the greatest scout in this Hive’s history, we can keep everyling here safe.”

Pharynx sighed. “Okay, your highness. You can rest as well, I will remain alert tonight.” Chrysalis then planted a little nuzzle on her golden drone’s forehead, which was greeted with a slightly playful hoof batting her muzzle away. “Sweet dreams, your highness. I will awaken Fruit Punch when it is time for the two of you to depart.” Pharynx soluted his Queen before trying to shoe Chrysalis off to her quarters.

Third person

As Fruit and Chrysalis got off the carriage, being pulled by the courtesy of Skitter and Slither, Fruit had the pleasure of booping the disguised Skitter on the nose, before trotting after Chrysalis, disguised as Crystal Clear, to get on the train. The changeling Queen nodded to a random stallion, before hopping on, and Fruit tilted his head in confusion.

“That was one of my spies, who was stationed at Canterlot. I believe he was returning to the Hive, to go write a report before heading out on his next mission. Which is whatever Pharynx sees fit, as Pharynx is my second in command,” Chrysalis explained.

“Man… You… ponies are really cool.” Fruit did his best not to say changeling.

‘Whatever’ the spy thought to himself. If whatever the buzz was in the Hive mind at the moment was anything to go by, then that must be his Queen and her new consort. So Echo didn’t pay much heed, before his eyes opened wide…

“So that’s what the royal wedding is for…” Echo whispered before trotting up to the carriage that was being pulled by his fellow disguised changelings. “Hello, ‘River’ and ‘Rain’, ready to head back home?” The spy asked. “Because I have made a revelation that I must spread to the rest of the Hive!”

“Tell us!” Skitter bounced in his harness.

“The Queen is going to marry that stallion, and the ponies were nice enough to make a spectacle of it!” Now was probably a good time to mention that Echo was a rather inexperienced spy, and his mission was merely a test, but… The excitement of Queen Chrysalis, Queen of Love, getting married? That made the drones forget about their friend's inexperience. Both of the carriage drones got giddy.

“Well, why didn’t you start with that? Let’s go tell Pharynx!”

“Wait, what!?” Pharynx shouted, now pacing around in panic. “Why didn’t Queen Chrysalis tell anyling? Was she hoping to make this a surprise?”

“I think so sir, perhaps she’s not certain if everyling has fully accepted her chosen mate, for he is a pony. So I think the ponies, as friendly as they are, might be seeing this as a possible alliance between the Hive and Equestria, and are hosting a Royal Wedding in honor of the union,” Echo said smugly, “Heard some rich ponies talk about it, they didn’t mention the names… But I believe the Queen will be disguised as ‘Cadance’ or some other pony to keep things quiet.”

Good thing noling knew who the Hive Cadance actually was.

Pharynx rubbed his chin, before he shot up. “Gather the whole Hive! The Queen dares to marry somepony without telling us? We'll just have to come watch the wedding without an invitation. I will inform the ponies that we are planning to peacefully visit the Hive, and to have nothing to fear!” Pharynx grinned. “I wonder how many nymphs Chrysalis will want.”

Dear Princess Celestia,

We have been notified of a ‘Royal Wedding’ that you will be hosting in the next few weeks. I am excited to tell you that my whole country will be coming to Canterlot in hopes that we may attend this wedding. We hope to see our Queen marry her chosen pony mate.

It had also come to my attention that you ponies didn’t invite us, so we’ll just have to forcefully show up.

Your close friends,

An unknown country that won’t try to physically assault everypony in your capital city. We just wanna see somepony get married.

P.S, why didn’t you invite us at first?

It was perfect! The letter was full proof! A young, just barely an adult, drone thought to himself after writing the letter. Pharynx, the legendary Pharynx himself, had come to him! Him! To announce the Hive’s attendance in their Queen’s secretly planned wedding with a pony. The only conditions were that the letter could not call their Queen out by name, and that the Hive’s actual name could not be mentioned.

And so far, this seemed like the perfect letter! In a whisp of Changeling Fire, the letter flew off to the distance, directly to Princess Celestia.

Fruit Punch

So uh, the train broke down. It’s not too big of a deal, the train stopped outside of a town called Ponyville, a small, cozy looking town. Y’know, the stupidly named town I mentioned earlier? Well, it’ll be about a day to diagnose the problem, according to the engineers, and a day to fix the problem, and then a day to also refuel the train, and then- you get the point. Me and Chrysalis were stuck in this little town for a week.

On the bright side, I still had a whole two and a half weeks off of work, and Chryssy and I had more than enough money to pay for a hotel room. The main problem was finding a hotel, as neither of us had ever been here before. Mainly because I’ve barely been in Equestria for three months, and Chrysalis just never saw a reason in being in this tiny little town.

So now Chrysalis, in her usual unicorn disguise, was walking beside me, happily chatting about how easily I had been accepted by her drones, and about small little things. The weather, Chrysalis’s excitement to explore somewhere new, my own excitement in possible exploration had toppled hers in a heartbeat.

Me a hairless monkey, new place monkey see, monkey want to roam new place. This time monkey won’t genocide the natives, natives might be friendly.

I will squish a native’s cheeks. They look very squishable.

“So, where to first, before we retire for the day, my dear Fruit?” Chrysalis asked. We stopped outside of a minigolf course, and Chrysalis snorted. “No! Never again, notta, I do not want to continue my cursed luck in mini golf!” I laughed, nuzzling my marefriend’s cheek, and the two of us continued to walk through town until…

“Is that…” I started

“Building made of…” Chrysalis continued

“A cake?” The two of us finally said in unison.

“That seems incredibly unhealthy,” I pointed out.

“Indeed it does, let us avoid it for now; I want to keep my Fruit Punch in tip, top, miniature shape so I can continue to cuddle thee in thy sleep!”

“Whoa now, Crystal, they might have some cookies. I want some cookies.”

“Fruit Punch, do you have Attention Deficit or Hyperactivity Disorder?” Chrysalis asked. On the dot, woman.

“Yeah.”

“And your disorder is telling you that you want some cookies?” I nodded. “Well… I suppose we can grab a box of cookies before we leave. Or, I will make you some homemade cookies in our motel room if it has an oven.”

“But… what if we don’t have an oven in our future motel room.”

“Then we run in this,” Chrysalis pointed at a poster for something called ‘Running of the Leaves’. “And then we get the cookies you crave.” Okay, good compromise. Some exercise before I load myself up on sugar so I can sufficiently crash- fucker, Chrysalis is using this as an opportunity to make me more submissive so she can cuddle with me even more!

“I see what you’re doing, Chryssy.” I chuckled when my marefriend looked shocked. “I still wanna do this ‘Running of the Leaves’ competition, and those cookies, but here’s the thing.” I got nice and close to Chrysalis’s ear and started whispering. “And we might have a little more… activity during our cuddling,” I finished and laughed.

“Fruit, you shameless-“

The rest of Crystal Clear’s words were muffled as she started squealing into my chest. A moment before my chest was being used as a pillow for shouting into, I got to see that Chrysalis’s face was as red as a beetroot, and it was adorable! Man, I should get Chrysalis flustered more often! If only Chrysalis wasn’t normally three times as tall as me.

I love holding Chryssy.

“I’m joking about that last bit, I’m not ready for that yet, but if you just wanna get me to cuddle with you a little earlier just ask. I’m your coltfriend, and I'm willing to do whatever for you, because I love you.” I patted my marefriend on the back. “C’mon, let's go find that motel, eh?” Chrysalis nodded and we made our way towards what looked like town hall for a map.

“Oh. My. Celestia! Fruit Punch? Is that you?” A familiar, white-

“Alabaster, with a Royal Purple mane.” Rarity glared up at the sky while correcting some odd force(Sorry Rarity. Will describe your colors better later.- Nugget). Uh… what?

“Fruit, it is you! What are you doing in Ponyville?”

“I was on a train, and the train broke down.”

“I see… and I see you have a marefriend now…” Rarity sighed. “Why must my knight in shining armor be taken already?” She murmured to herself before shrugging. “Well, I must take you and introduce you to the rest of my friends! I am certain that they would love to chat with you and…”

“Crystal Clear,” Chrysalis greeted. “You know my Fruit Punch?” She asked, cocking her head.

“Of course! He stopped a thief from running off with my purse in Canterlot! And I must say, you are quite the lucky mare to catch Fruit Punch’s heart. He is quite the sight.”

“Of course he is, his butttox is quite fascinating!” Now it was my turn to blush. Rarity raised an eyebrow and Crystal’s crude humor before shrugging it off. “But yes, I am quite fortunate to find somepony willing to love me for being me, and not somepony who only likes my body.”

“It is a really sexy body, y’know,” I chimed in.

Successful flirting scores:

Me: two.

Chrysalis: two hundred fifty four.

“Well, let us go book a motel for the week, Rarity. Just tell us a place to meet up with you and your friends, and we’ll meet up with y’all there.

“Why of course! Just meet me at Sugarcube Corner later today, you can’t miss it! Now go, there are only so many hotel rooms; there is only one hotel in all of Ponyville.”

You didn’t need to tell us twice-

“Fucker.” All the rooms were booked.

“Well-“

“I packed a tent,” Chrysalis said after somepony walked up and handed her a tent.

“That was one of your drones?”

“Indeed, I believe that was Rexas.” God damn, changelings are everywhere.

“So we’ll be camping?”

“Of course!” Chrysalis clapped her hooves. “I cannot wait! My first camping trip with my coltfriend!” Chrysalis squealed… She was planning this out too!

“First camping trip ever, woo!”

“Okay, that is not okay. Everypony must experience camping every now and then,” Chrysalis declared.

“But don’t we have to meet up with Rarity?”

“Of course. Let’s go meet with your friend.”

“You…”

“No Fruit Punch, I am not jealous. I can tell that Rarity finds you attractive, but I can also sense your emotions in you as well. I can tell you simply wish to catch up with somepony who considers you a friend. So no, this won’t be awkward for me either. I am quite looking forward to meeting Miss Rarity’s friends.”

“You emotion detectors.”

“Makes dating easier; I know you’re being faithful to me, and makes me love you even more, you sexy, little, loyal thing.”

Okay, Chrysalis is now at two hundred and fifty five successful flirts- nevermind, she just kissed me on the nose, and a second time on the lips.

Two hundred and fifty six points to Chryssy.

Why must you break my brain so often, dear?

‘Crystal Clear’ threw me on her back while I was in my stupor, magicked up a map, and started trotting off to what I think is Sugarcube Corner: Cafe and Bakeshop.

Author's Note

Well, now plans are set in motion. And now the dronee, being kinda naive and excited, are gonna try to attend a wedding.

and thanks to a very poorly worded letter, it’s gonna be seen as a threat!

I know, dumb way to get the invasion to happen, but it seemed like an oddly cute, funny thing at the time. So I wanted it to happen.