To Save our Legacy

They were waiting for me...

If it sounds like I was living the intro sequence of a Sunday night, low-budget scary movie, it’s because that’s exactly what it was. At least, that’s how I was experiencing it in my just-recently squeaky-clean flesh.

My hair wasn't even completely dry after a fifteen-minute thorough, extra-bubbly double-double-shower when I, still shirtless and dribbling loose droplets onto the marblework, stumbled against an impatiently waiting Izzy just as I was just exiting the bathroom in a cloud of steam, sending a silent prayer to the heavens for the miracle of hot water and clean clothes.

She was indeed waiting for me specifically, leaning her side against the railing of the footbridge, her rump on the floor and her forehoof tapping slowly and rhythmically against the tiles, like a father about to scold their child for a combination of the late hour and the stink of alcohol, my head proceeding to count down the seconds until my demise. Gone was her peppy, wacky self I’d grown to adore for the day. Gone was her sunny smile that could rival that of the mare with the same name. Her dry features bore down on me, leaving no room for escape or complaint.

She must've talked with Sunny while I was sharing a heart-to-heart with Gaius. I should’ve expected as much.

I knew my wits, and irresistible charms, wouldn't win me a way out of this fastball, so I didn't even bother. Sighing and slumping a bit, I sent the wet towel over my back to flop unceremoniously onto the bathroom floor and fell in line with the sergeant without a word, fumbling with my shirt next as it covered my scar-dressed torso. Funny, before my resurrection at Harmony’s… hooves, I guess?; my body was already a macabre canvas of numerous scars and ‘kind’ reminders from my numerous adventures with the girls. Harmony had purged them all that day except the one over my heart. My very own cutie mark, you see? I always liked to think of it in such a gruesome way. Sometimes, it still ached for some reason, perhaps to make sure I wouldn't ever forget it.

‘Heh, guess I should throw myself off the cliff right behind our home, see if she brings me back a white canvas again…’

I shouldn't be making jokes about it. Not even to myself.

Zipp and Pipp were still AWOL for the morning, as was Hitch, most likely wrapping up this morning's rounds, a short-lived endeavor since normally the streets of the Bay didn't need that much police work. I was hoping he’d bring Sparky with him. I missed the little bugger a lot and wanted nothing but to pinch those chubby cheeks and blow raspberries on each and every of his little belly scales…

Geez, I sounded like my grandma back there. I mean, I had the age requirement…

Who was waiting for Drill Sergeant Izzy and clumsy recruit me in the living room was my loving marefriend, leisurely laying on her belly, slumped over the couch, going with gusto over one of the old books I’d brought from Canterlot’s royal library during our second trip. This was probably the hundredth time she must’ve devoured them all, including the one in her hooves, and another hundred times would follow that, I was dead sure.

A woollen blanket covered her rear half, for the temperatures were reaching new lows with every day that winter neared. A placid smile adorned her muzzle as she ran her sparkling eyes over the endless lines of faded text, still readable by some miracle, for the intensity exuding from the hungry mare should’ve worn them down by now.

The most beautiful of landscapes. My heart swelled with affection, as it did every time I found myself around her. In turn for the love I felt for that mare, it made me feel even more like shit for everything I’d put her through these recent days, last night’s little mental breakdown included and highlighted foremost in the list of stuff I had to mend with her.

Her ears perked up when Izzy’s hooves and the muffled step of my boots alerted her of our presence. That same eager smile shone tenfold when she saw us approaching, closing the book, whose title I could not discern, with the utmost care and resting it on the coffee table, doggy-earing the page she had left it.

She scooched aside so as to lend us some space on the couch, taping on the now free pillow for me to snuggle beside her.

Only I was to take a place beside her at the time, since Izzy kindly offered to whip up something for us to munch on, as well as for the rest when they arrived. I needn’t be a genius to guess we'd be there for a while, for I had a lot of things to share and the ponies a lot of questions to ask; so some snacks would do us good. Her undisguised glare and pursed snout as she trotted away basically hammered in me that I had from now until then to man up and drag my ass in repentance to Sunny for having acted like an asshat to her.

Faust in heaven, what the fuck was wrong with me? It had been so long since I’d broken down like that.

I wasn’t in the best state of mind when that topic was brought to light. Even if I’d made the choice a while ago as I braved the wilderness, it didn't excuse the baggage I’d slumped onto her; but the way I did it was arguably worse, scaring her halfway to death, while at the same time leaving me as the King of Hypocrites after having criticized Celestia and Luna for doing the same thing with Twilight.

However, I remained firm in my words. I truly felt she should step up and embrace the role of leader she had unconsciously filled the horseshoes of since the very beginning. It was simply that the delivery method was far from the most appropriate one. I had a reason for it. A heavy reason. An old friend had reminded me of such.

I’d fix it. This time, a bit differently. I had an idea of how to explain the reason why I could no longer trust myself to think the right way and do the right thing. There was something I needed to show them.

I planted my butt on the plush sofa and leaned back with a grunt, my abdomen protesting at the exertion but giving me no further trouble. While Sunny remained cold once we found ourselves alone, I didn't wait for the air to sour down into an awkward silence; I latched myself onto her with my levitation magic, catching her by surprise with a small squeak as I hugged the mare against me as if my life depended on it. It might as well have.

“A-Alex!” She squealed in shock, squirming a bit in my lap, but making no attempt to pry herself free.

“I’m sorry, baby,” I whispered into her mane, rejoicing in her summery scent as I nuzzled the closest ear within reach, making it twitch adorably. “I was a jerk last night, going down on you like that. I’m so, so sorry…”

Her gaze softened after a moment of debate, relaxing her body and sinking further into my embrace as she reciprocated with her own, her tail coiling around my leg protectively. “I told you this morning. It's fine.” She soothed me softly, letting me nuzzle her mane to my heart’s content as she grabbed one of the hands looping around her to caress in return.

It had been a short and incomplete conversation that morning while we nibbled on some meager, hospital breakfast, none of us tearing into on it with much passion, to the nurses' complaints. As much as she wanted to let me know that she somehow understood that I was not bringing my A-game, and that my outburst didn't convey exactly what I wanted to transmit, I still felt like I needed to make it up to her.

And I’d do just that, starting now and… later that night… in our bedroom… alone.

But, for the time being, I simply wanted nothing more but to cuddle that mare and make sure as hell that she knew, above anything else going on with me or the world, I loved her with the force of the seas and the impetus of the wind and wanted nothing but the best for her.

“Still, baby, I feel like a heartless prick,” I confessed without an ounce of shame, nibbling on her left ear’s rim to her shuddering delight. “I’m gonna make it up to you, I promise.” I then reached for the very same ear to whisper some very adult things that wrapped up nicely what I’d planned to compensate her with later in the day in full, explicit detail, making her explode in a full body flush.

Oh, how I had missed that endearing, rosy tint painting every inch of her every time I whispered something spicy in her ear. Even now, after we’d already had lots of fun together, it felt like being the first time over and over again.

With some peace of mind settling in, short-lived as it would be, I was content with simply enjoying some together time with my mare while we waited, not allowing yesterday's gaucheness to drive a wedge between us, expressing our love freely for one another with a flurry of kisses, nuzzles and a playful bite or two, eliciting giggle after giggle from a squirming Sunny which, to my ears, and after what felt like a lifetime apart, sounded like nothing short of heaven.

You should totally get a pony in your life.

Sunny had completely gyrated in my lap by the time I had run out of places to kiss and nuzzle her fuzzy head, now laying belly to belly, for she had gently pushed us down on the couch, taking our preferred resting arrangements when we slept together… and most of the time awake too.

Her gorgeous smile lit the room with the return of her sparkle, as Izzy would have worded it, casting yesterday’s tangled encounter to the wind to be forever fotgotten, or so my heart wished. We’d missed each other too much to care. A bit over two weeks as it’d ended up being, it felt like a century, for both of us, I was positive; a century I wished anything to not go through again.

In that light, I had another favor to ask of my mare. I could no longer trust myself.

‘Stop!’

“Sweetie...” I softly called out to Sunny, pretending not to listen. I refused to listen.

“Mmm?” She purred back, lost in tracing the edges of the scar over my heart with the tip of her hoof, her dreamy, half-lidded eyes locked into mine.

“I… I have another favor to ask of you.” Before the cold jitters of panic could begin to get a hold over my mare, I gently shushed her with a caress on her muzzle. “And I promise you, you’ll completely agree with this one.”

Not totally sold, Sunny at least trusted me far enough to give me a tiny nod, listening purposefully while tightening her hold on me as some degree of concern couldn't be helped but latch itself onto her heart.

Brushing a thumb down her furry cheek, her beautiful eyes demanded nothing but the warmest of smiles from me, which I was more than happy to provide. “Don’t ever let me do that ‘solo hero’ crap again. Ever.” I requested, clean and simple, her pupils widening in surprise. “Doesn’t matter how much I whine or protest, or try and stubborn my way through. Please, don’t let me go out there without you guys backing me up. I need you. Buck some sense into my gut, tie me down to a chair, rut me breathless if that’s what takes. I… I almost went crazy out there without you guys. If I hadn't found Gaius…”

A melodic giggle highlighted by a cute blush cut through my pleadings like a hot knife through butter, evaporating any further words while my mare giggled into her hoof as if I’d just told her a bad joke or something.

“Uh… baby?” I pried with a lopsided grin.

“Oh, sorry.” She breathed out one last snicker before smiling down at me in an endearing, almost condescending way. “You’re so cute thinking we'd ever let you out of our sight again after this.”

Problem solved. Trust my Sunny to cut the bullshit short and settle the deal. I couldn't be more happy with the result. “Heh, that's my girl.”

Gently guiding her with my hand, I brought our lips together and tenderly kissed her, pouring as much love and meaning as my recovering body could muster. Our breaths mingled as Sunny took a more dominating posture that she knew I liked, sliding further up and falling down on me with the weight of her own kiss. Her hooves searched my hands and pulled them aside, leaving me wide open for her attack. She pried my lips open without need for an invitation and, soon, our tongues were dancing their usual tango, one I could only dream of for the past few weeks, and from which now I drank greedily.

Her taste, her warmth, her silky fur, the feeling of her weight atop mine, the beating of her heart against my own. I needed it all, and more. To heal me. To remind me that I was good, that I was worth it. To remind me that I was better, that I’d become even better for her. I’d make her my sole reason if that’s what I needed, my sole anchor, my guiding light. My pony family would be the strength behind my blades, the resolution of my shield, the why of my spells, and the reason behind my every choice. Them, not me. I’d trust her with all of me and heed what she thought best, for my mare had not led her friends astray, as was my burden. She hadn't hurt them in her selfishness as was my sin, one of many.

Sunny freed my hands and moved her hold on my head, almost needing to keep it in place as she devoured my lips with reckless abandon. I lost myself in her, letting her take the lead as I reached for her supple flanks, groping her cutie marks with a familiar tingling welcoming me, coalescing in my loins.

I need it so bad. I needed her so badly…

To my utmost dismay, Sunny was the one to keep a cooler head and pull back when our lungs couldn't sponsor our making out anymore.

“Ahh… Mmph…” She panted and wheezed as if coming fresh from the Running of the Leaves, falling back on her rump, pressing down with it on all the important places, and becoming well aware of my outright painful erection. She bit her lip and wiggled her rear to tease me. “Mmmmmnot now. Our friends could arrive at any moment.” She panted with no short amount of reluctance herself, but she was right. “Later tonight, okay? You can make it up to me as much as you want.” She purred with a naughty giggle, falling back down to capture my lips fleetingly before pulling back letting us both cool down a notch. Blue-balled as I had just been left, the promise of a full night of fun was enough to keep my disappointed libido with its head held high…

‘That sounded better in my head… Fuck, I’m just gonna park it… Fuck! Stop thinking!’

Sunny slumped down on top of me again, like Fluttershy’s hamster friends melting adorably under the morning sun. Back and forth, she changed from pecking my lips to nibbling my earlobes to nuzzling my collarbone.

“... Wow. I just realized.” I hummed softly, tracing the outline of her cutie marks from memory as I peered into her gorgeous pearls.

“Mmm?” Sunny murmured back, heavy eyes growing sleepier by the second under the warmth we shared with one another.

“You’re so pretty,” I stated like it was the most obvious thing in the world, with my most devilish smile following my words.

All traces of tiredness promptly vacated my mare as she reeled back to fully loom over me with equal parts surprise and offense.

“... Nowyou realize I’m pretty!!” She boomed.

“Mhm,” I replied, sweet and innocent, like a foal.

Her eyes twitched, her previously shimmy tail becoming still. I kept up with my grin as I felt the mare atop me growing hotter by the second, and not precisely from arousal. Bullets began trickling down my brow as I gave it my best to remain steely under her pressure.

“... So, what have you been looking at this whole time?!”

Despite my poor attempts, Sunny did NOT miss the short, brief, infinitesimal peek I shot at the flanks I was currently petting before fixing my gaze back at her smoldering one.

“...”

“...”

“... OUCH!! OUCH!! Okay, okay!! I’m so-YIKES!! STAHP!! OW!!”

Bringing a storm on her tail, Sunny fell over me with the might of the goddess, her sharp, herbivore teeth searching for any and all available sensitive spots known to man to nip at with mareish fury, leaving me to squirm and mewl pathetically as I did my best to fend her off.

“AY!! OW OW OW!! OKAY!! I take it back! I take it back!!” My pleas were heeded when my Sunny pulled back from her merciless bombardment, glaring down at me with an adorable pout, which I did my best not to swoon and coo at and get her even more pissed. I tried the ol’ reliable reverse psychology. “I take it back, okay? You’re an ugly, wrinkly mare, and your flanks would give the gayest of stallions nightmares.”

“...”

“...”

“...”

“... AAAH! Owowowow! OW!! Sunny!! Plea-OUCH!! What do you want me to sa-GAH!!”

My mare and I went down for a short, love-struck scuffle, with bites, ear tugs, and light stomps of our weapons of choice. The couch only gave us so much room to quarrel, meaning Sunny retained her advantage over me through most of the battle. Not that you’d catch me complaining about having a gorgeous mare raining Tartarus over me, rubbing and nipping in all the good places while doing so, even if I would end up looking like Cerberus’ chew toy after she was done with me.

We concluded our glorious feud in a similar way I’d end up my frequent tumbles with an over-playful Izzy when she had some energy to burn: with me chomping on the scruff of her withers, like a mother cat would carry her kittens, and Sunny using one of my forearms as the aforementioned chewing toy.

Synchronized as a pair of drunk toddlers, our riffle came to a sudden halt, both of us blinking owlishly at one another when we realized that we’d ended up tangled together. My eyes searched her bewildered ones and, after a second of befuddled stillness, we broke into laughter like the pair of dummies we were.

Squeezing my mare tight as our cackling ran its course, I felt the happiest I’d been in a long while, the butterflies in my tummy teaming up with the warmth in my chest to bury all the mental and emotional weight that had followed me from the trip to Mithaya, allowing me to feel like myself again. No fear of a changeling incursion, no voices in my head, either from Harmony’s whispers or the Nightmare’s tendrils seeking a way in, playing a tug-of-war with me being the rope.

Nothing but the mare in my arms and me. Everything I needed. Everything I wanted.

‘Pitiful…’

I did not listen.

We laid back into peaceful silence if I could help it, brushing my hand over Sunny’s mane and coiling her rainbow streak with a finger while she gazed lovingly at me with dreamy eyes.

I felt a bit playful. “Heh, we humans are a constant headache for you ponies, aren’t we?” I proffered in jest, gently pinching the bridge of her snot, making her furrow her muzzle cutely before sneezing.

“Meh, you have your uses.” She snarked back with a little nip on my collarbone, absentmindedly pawing my chest as if preparing the dough for Pizza Friday.

“I’m sure we do.” I chuckled, gazing up to the ceiling as I rejoiced in the beating of her heart against mine. A random thought popped to life. “... Hm, I wonder how it was for Megan…”

“Who?” Sunny perked up, almost as if smelling the beginning of a tale with her usual thirst.

“Megan, the first human to ever step foot on Equus.” I cited, knowing well the tale of the human girl from the times before Equestria and the unification of the three tribes, cocking my head sideways in thought. “Haven’t I told you the story of the inception and destruction of Dream Valley?”

The way her gorgeous orbs widened like saucers, and her tail began wagging against my pants, said it all, the happiest of grins eagerly painted on her beaming muzzle.

“Well then,” I cleared my voice, feeling like passing the time with a good tale. “This a story of Equus’ ancient, ancient past, waaaay before the creation of Equestria, to the birthplace of equine ki-”

The slam of the front door opening and closing, followed by the flapping of wings and a chorus of voices chatting amicably in muffled tones, alarmed us of the arrival of our pony pals from a morning well spent in town. Izzy joined the conversation from the kitchen, seemingly having finished the treats just in time. As a group, they made their way towards the living room where Sunny saw my storytelling disappointedly cut short.

“Sorry, Tangerine. A story for another day.”

“Nooooo…” Sunny whined, slumping down on me with her best puppy eyes and trembling lip combo to knock my defenses down like a toothpick.

“Awww, I can't say no to those eyes of yours.” I returned her pouty lips and scratched her behind her ears, breaking her cuteness spell with a disappointed groan into my shirt. “I’ll tell you later, our friends are here.”

With a flurry of excited chatter and hoof stomps, four ponies strode into the living room, sharing that day’s mundane occurrences with a friendly stride. Catching us in a somewhat compromising arrangement, the four rooted themselves to the floor as they fixed their collective gaze on us with lopsided smiles.

“Uh… Are we interrupting something?” Zipp said, voicing the group’s collective question.

I felt like being a bit impish. “Oh, nothing much. Just about to make furious love to this mare here. You’re welcome to watch if that’s your mojo...”

With a loud ‘eep!’, Sunny, burning up in a full body blush, buried as much of herself as she could in me as I burst into laughter, the ponies sharing a collective eye roll at my dry attempt of humor.

Nothing else but a bunch of friends playing around a bit. The things you can take for granted…

A babyish gurgle dominated over the gang’s collective groan. From behind Hitch’s aquamarine mane, a pair of tiny horns peeked over, followed by the beaming face of a baby dragon, eyes wide in happiness as he found me waving at him from the couch after pushing us both into more befitting arrangements.

“Brrlgrah!!” The little drake screeched with the excitement of a hatchling and was off his surrogate dad’s back and speeding into my waiting arms, tiny wings flapping furiously, seeking to speed him up while on the ground since they likely still weren’t strong enough to lift him up in the air.

“Oh my gosh, come here you little bugger!”

I glomped that little drake with all my might and proceeded with the usual ritual of nuzzling his adorable cheeks and blowing raspberries into his scaly belly, sending him into a flurry of giggles and flailing limbs. The ponies ‘awwwed’ in unison as their hearts melted.

“Oooh, I missed you so much, Sparky. You little burpy devil you!”

On cue, Sparky burped out a gout of green, shimmering flame. I think he signed my overgrown fringe a bit, but I couldn't care less with a squirming drake seconds away from bursting out in happiness in my lap.

Hiking my hand under his stubby arms, I sent the little dragon up in the air with a big whoop. While his wings were indeed still too tiny for any proper lift, his hatchling energy and developing instincts were enough at least to bring him back down in a clumsy hover, making for a soft landing on my lap and back in the air again to his squealing delight.

As I played with Sparky, the rest of the gang made themselves at home over the living room, Izzy and Pipp fast on their hooves to bathe Sunny in a healthy barrage of teasing after my jest, making the fire on her cheeks climb all the way to her ears and back again as she tried her best to become a ball of embarrassment, to the mares’ giggling amusement.

I let the girls be girls, playing with Sparky until my arms grew tired of sending him up with the zoomies, bringing the drake close to scratch that sweet spot he had behind his curved horns.

Hitch, keeping a fatherly eye on the drake, was dragged into his own set of cuddles with his marefriend on the other couch opposite of ours across the coffee table where Izzy had rested an assortment of treats and drinks. Zipp’s wing came to rest under the sheriff’s chin as they made dovey eyes for one another, oblivious to the world around them.

A purple snout erupted into the drake’s vision. Having finished teasing her bestie until turning Sunny into a tiny ball of crimson embarrassment, Izzy wanted her own turn with Sparky, the bond the two shared having won her the unofficial title of ‘Aunty Izzy’, and possibly the second most favorite pony to the drake, behind his dragon dad, of course.

Izzy had a sweet spot for the hatchling, not that any of us didn't. But I guessed Izzy, being how she was, made it easier for her to keep up with the young dragon's boundless energy with as much pep and enthusiasm as Sparky exuded. Kinda reminded me of Pinkie Pie and the Cake Twins.

‘Faust, how did hers and Cheese’s little colt fare in the end? I hope he grew happy and safe with his family, far away from all the trouble.’

‘No thanks to you…’

I. Did. Not. Listen!

“Hiiii there, little Sparky.” Izzy baby-talked to the drake, who answered in kind by gripping her snout with his blunt, little claws, gurgling some semblance of her name, but not enough to form a proper word yet. Soon enough, though. “Oooooh, aren't you the most adorable little thing ever?!”

His baby-like attention span demanded the playful unicorn to become his absolute world for the next few minutes. Rejoiced as he was with seeing his big, lanky uncle back, it was time for some much-sought unicorn cuddles, patented and delivered by one mare only in the whole wide world.

Taking the leftmost side of the couch, I let Izzy distract the little guy for the time being as Pipp was next to approach me, taking something from under her wing and presenting it to me.

I was quick to recognize the triangular shape. “Oh. Well, that was fast.” I found the object to be another smartphone, caseless as if it had been taken straight out of its packaging, in her extended hoof. I meant to take it and take a look while thanking the pegasus…

“Thanks a lot, Pipp.”

Only for the mare in question to bump my forehead with the corner of the device. “Ouch!” I reeled back, rubbing my throbbing brow.

Balancing herself on my knees with a hoof, Pipp’s eyes narrowed threateningly, wings flared at her sides. “Last freebie, yes?! The next one is coming out of your own pocket, mister!” She fired.

With her little glare becoming borderline adorable, I listened to my self-preservation instincts and offered no retort. I simply gave a most solemn promise with a nod. Keeping her suspicion up for a few more tense moments for good measure, Pipp dropped the new phone into my lap unceremoniously, sighing tiredly as she reached for her opposite wing to extract her own device. “Now, to get you back in the group chat and kick the old number… Gosh, now I gotta add you again everywhere! This is gonna take for-ahver.” She whined theatrically.

Amused by her usual melodrama, I chuckled and stored the new phone in my pocket to configure later. Still in impish spirits, I grabbed the petite pegasus under her forelegpits and brought her up to my now free lap, having missed the sing-song mare dearly just as I had the rest of our friends, not wanting to derail down into our usual headbutting for a change, as funny as it was to see her feathers ruffled.

“Yipe!” Pipp squealed in surprise, her rump coming to rest over my calves and her back against my chest. “What gives?!” She wanted to know, peering up upside down at me searchingly, making me snicker with the cuteness of the gesture and the way her mane bobbed down her withers.

“Nothing.” I shrugged nonchalantly, poking her snout. “Just missed having the prettiest pegasus in town to enliven my morning with her songs.” A true occurrence. Not having the foresight to download them on my phone, I had to sing-song them to myself to stave off the boredom of the journey.

Huffing proudly and without an ounce and modesty, she combed her mane back with a polished hoof and repositioned her tiara, smiling proudly at her own success. “Of course you did.” She stated in short, and of course, didn't miss the chance to send her sis an ‘I’m the prettiest sister’ kinda leer, the alabaster pegasus sticking her tongue back while making a flashy number of nuzzling her stallion sweetly and methodically for the youngest of the royal family to have a clear view, Hitch not wanting to become food for the flames but too absorbed in his mare to care much.

“Ugh.” Pipp pouted, crossing her forelegs over her chest, defeated by the harsh reality of life. Nothing that a big squeeze from me couldn’t fix.

“It’s not like you have a gazillion fans banging at the proverbial door…” I hinted to the wind, but the petite pegasus only scoffed further and grumbled under her breath something about glory hunters and riding her fame or whatnot.

I scratched behind her twitchy ears to make her feel better. “Sorry about the phone.” I felt like I needed to apologize yet again, feeling genuinely bad, since we all know how much those hellish devices actually cost, no matter the planet you step on. “It was a bad moment for me and I wasn’t thinking clearly. Totally my bad. I’ll make it up to you.”

It seemed there was a lot of making-up that I needed to pass around. It’d be a fun week or two for me. Served me right.

Pipp gazed up again with a puzzled dip of her head. “Uh... And how exactly are you planning on making it up to me?” She asked with no short amount of snark, a hoof flying to her chest proudly. “In case you haven’t heard, I am a princess. I already have everything I could ever wish for.” She gloated as a true royal born knows best. “And what I don’t, I can get with just a flick of my hoof.”

“Hmm.” I scratched my chin in faux contemplation. “True. But, is a flick of your hoof gonna get me as the star guest on your podcast, next Friday afternoon?”

Pipp’s eyes widened in surprise, sparkling with excitement and planification, for she’d already brought all members of our wacky family except me, something she’d been bugging me for since the conception of said podcast. She’d even kept the name I’d suggested for her, and the ‘Pippcast’ has remained number one on Sponify ever since the first episode with Sunny.

True to her words, she flashed me a victory grin and made sure to heed her own advice by weaving her hoof dramatically, as if calling for a maid. She was just missing a tiny, silver belle for the complete package.

Having dug my own grave, I’d simply have to pluck up my courage and attend her backstage studio at Mane Melody. And let the mare of the hour dissect my brain for juicy details for the audience’s entertainment.

… Nah, her talks were actually very sweet, I’d have a fun time.

“It’s a date, then.” I settled, making a tiny blush taint her cheeks when I used the term. I saw a very disapproving Sunny glaring at me through the corner of my eye. I sent a wink to the fuming mare to let her know I was only playing before she thought it appropriate to bite me all over again for my efforts.

“It’s a shame, though.” I engaged after a moment of thought, absentmindedly petting Pipp’s belly as I raised my tone a bit to address the group. “Should’ve taken more pictures, and kept the phone. I saw some crazy stuff out there.” I went over the contents and sights of my journey before choosing one I was positive would spark their curiosity. “Like, you know the Spring Dew Riverlands, just north of Canterlot, between the Silver Run and the Neighagra Streams?”

Of course, they didn't know, but I felt they still retained some semblance of Equestria’s general outline from the short lessons I provided them with before and while embarking beyond the limits of the Bay during Discord’s crisis. “Yeah. So I passed nearby as I headed west, and I saw this huge, and I mean huuuuge stormfront blanketing the entirety of the northern skies, all the way towards the Frozen North and the Crystal Empire.” Sunny lost her pouting as her ears perked up, scooching a bit closer to me. “I didn't stay long but, I swear that, if you looked close enough in between lightning gouts, you could totally see the outline of Cloudsdale somewhere up there in the heart of the storm.”

Ponies back and forth perked up with renewed wonder, one alabaster pegasus in particular. Having ‘Storm’ in your name usually seemed to make one find such things captivating, and Zipp was one of those ponies. Although, in truth, it wasn’t the storm that piqued her interest.

“Cloudsdale?!! The legendary pegasus city?!! Home base of the Wonderbolts?!!” She cried up, leaving behind her sugar-bear to perk herself up on her hooves, wings flaring in excitement with every rapidly-fired question.

“The one and only,” I replied with a knowing smirk, having learned of Zipp’s personal interest in said elite group of ponies from the old posters and trinkets collected and left behind by her on that abandoned station that she used as her personal escape from her mom’s insistent lessons and whatnot. “You still have those old posters?” Zipp nodded vigorously. She should keep them, for they were now a most valuable collector's piece from a forgotten era. “Yeah. The Wonderbolts Academy and AOC were stashed there. Hmm… We’ve totally gotta find a way of visiting. I’m sure you guys would like to know more about pegasi history.”

As if feeling the old roots of a long-lost home calling for them, a renewed thirst for exploration bewitched our two pegasus members, each of them claiming their own reasons for their sudden change of heart. While the oldest sister wanted to learn anything and everything there was to be known about the Wonderbolts, Equestria’s greatest fliers in her self-cultured view; the younger was surprisingly more inclined to learn about the prospects of pegasi society as a whole within the true skies, especially around the topic of living in a city made up entirely of clouds. What food did they grow and eat? What clothes did they wear, and were they made up of clouds? Did they make perfumes out of clouds?

“Waaaait wait wait wait.” A sudden thought struck Pipp, causing her to stop dead on her hooves, breaking her trail of questions. I gazed down at her expectantly, still petting her cushy belly since she hadn’t seen a reason to leave my lap yet. That’s what belly rubs do to a pony. “Was by any chance Songbird Serenade from Cloudsdale?”

Now that’s a pony I hadn't thought about for a while. Shame on me, since she was THE Pop Star of the time in the whole wide world of Equestria. Seriously, the unchallenged number one. No Countess Coloratura or Starlight Primrose or nothing. That pegasus mare had the Equestrian music industry at her hooves. It was no surprise to see Pipp had at least heard something about her.

“As a matter of fact, she was,” I confirmed Pipp’s query, making her day and her week while I was at it. “Yeah, her studio was there with all her stuff. I believe she was a regular in Prance Prance Records for her recordings. If there’s anything left of her work, it will be there.” I made a short play of brushing my overgrown beard in thought, although I couldn’t fight off a smirk since I already knew the answer. “I wonder if vinyl records last longer than books...”

Pipp exploded in ecstasy, catapulting in the air and doing a few somersaults you would’ve expected to come from her sister before mashing her snout against my nose in a sudden dive.

“We HAVE to go there!!!” She asked (demanded), shaking my shirt and me with it with reckless abandon. “I NEED THOSE RECORDS!!!”

Hitch saw me wince under Pipp’s rough treatment, my scars not forgiving in the slightest. “Simmer down, Pipp.” He tempered the pegasus’ excitement from his place beside her sister, who also wholeheartedly agreed on the need to visit, albeit with a more reserved celebration. “Remember us poor wingless ponies.”

Pipp wasn’t gonna let that ‘small’ inconvenience trump her planning. Pulling the hyperactive pegasus back a bit before Sunny could begin to get the wrong idea, Pipp kept herself aloft in front of me, already with a proposition on her muzzle.

“You can build one of those big things? Right?! From that movie!! How did you call them?!”

“Er…” I had more or less an idea of what she was referring to. “You mean an airplane? Helico-?”

“Yes! Airplane, that’s it!! Can you build us one?!” She begged with a pleading gesture on her hooves. “Pleaaahehehese. You’re so smart and all!”

Warmed as I was by her praise, I would have to take the wind from her sails… or wings for that matter. “Sorry, Pipp. I’m not that kind of smart.” I gave her an apologetic shrug. “I mean, there was this guy… Fuck, what was his name?... Ah, yes, Wind Rush. I think he said that was close to getting something like an airframe more or less functional after he inquired with me a few times. But nothing solid as far as I know.”

“Awww…” Right on cue, Pipp lost her energy and slumped down on the floor with a small pout of disappointment.

A tired voice needed to comment. “Leave it to my sis to whine over some old, dusty records.”

Zipp made the mistake of downplaying Pipp’s reasons, earning her a pink-furred missile loaded with complaints and reasons for why recovering the work of the single-most popular singer to ever step hoof in Equestria WAS as important as visiting those stupid, skin-tight-dressed, speedy clowns Zipp called Wonderbolts.

She was right about the skin-tight suits, though. It made for an… interesting picture if you caught a nice angle or two, if you know what I mean…

You pervs.

As the sisters tumbled down on another of their daily sisterly scuffles, with poor Hitch becoming the filling of a pegasi sandwich as the two mares screeched at each other; my mare was also on board with the idea of visiting. All of us. Together. She felt the need to remind me in case I had a short memory span or something.

“Um, you think I’d be able to visit with my alicorn powers?” Sunny wondered, snuggling up back fully to my side since Pipp had vacated the premises.

“You haven’t tried cloud walking yet?” I asked my mare, to which she shook her head no sheepishly. I had to admit I was surprised. “Huh, I thought you’d covered everything with Zipp regarding your flight.”

She rubbed her hoof over my chest nervously. “Yes. I, uh… I learned lots about flying and all, but…”

“But you got the jitters, right?” I finished for her, already picturing what had run through her mind at the moment of truth.

Sunny replied with a shy smile and a nod. I couldn't really blame her. The few times I’d walked on clouds under the effects of the appropriate spell had all left me feeling queasy and trembling afterward, even with the reassurance of Twilight being the one to cast the spell on me. For us land-dwellers, it was an unnatural thing to step on clouds, more so if you found yourself several hundred meters in the air with nothing but pure, clean air to refresh your lungs and stop your fall if you should trip or the spell should wear off. I could see where she was coming from.

“We can try another time if you want. Zipp can bring us a small cloud to ground level and you can… I don’t know, nap in it? Trust me, it’s the best feeling in the world.”

Not fully sold on the idea, Sunny at least was willing to give it a try, as long as we kept things no higher than a hop from the ground.

However, the mare had a different approach to the training session. “Can we… um,” She fumbled with her hooves, the rosy tint returning to her cheeks. “Can we nap on a cloud? Like, together?”

I felt myself melt all over with those gorgeous, pleading eyes of hers. “It’s been a while since I used the cloudwalking spell, but… sure. Why not?” I inched closer to her fuzzy ears to whisper what was truly running through her mind. “But, is it napping what you really wanna do?”

We both knew what would happen should we find ourselves alone in a cloud bed, and the way Sunny exploded in a blush was enough to let me know I should be looking forward to some fun times in the near future.

“That actually reminds me, by the way.” An old proposition came back to mind, filed aside in the urgency of the trip to the Hive. “Hey, Zipp.”

“Mmff?” She replied with a muzzle full of her sister's mane muffling her as she tugged it in reprisal to Pipp chomping on her right wing. “*Pffth!* Yes?” She repeated with a clear mouth.

“You wanna learn how to shoot lightning?” I offered, an ability a pegasus could excel at in the same way a proficient unicorn caster would, with the only difference that a cloud is needed beforehand, but with results no less amazing, and destructive if that was the intended goal. Since I wanted to see another Timberwolf tearing a chunk out of her as little as Zipp would, I thought it might prove useful for the most skilled pegasus of our entourage. I could trust her to make responsible use of it. The prankster's blood did not run through her veins as it did in a certain blue and rainbow pegasus back in the day.

Turquoise eyes going wide with scheming wickedness, the most devilish of smiles grew on Zipp’s muzzle as she bore down on her sister, their scuffle all but forgotten in light of a better, funnier alternative.

Pipp, letting go of her sister’s wing, shied back with no little amount of dread. “Don’t even think about it, Zephyrina!” She half-warned-half-whimpered, to which Zipp turned a deaf ear and began rubbing her forehooves together, hatching an evil plan to give her little sis her due, as befitted an older sibling.

I took it as a yes from the alabaster pegasus, although I was then seriously doubting that some prankster genes were not indeed infecting her. Whatever the case, it gave me something to do and a useful skill for her to know.

“Hey, hey!” A furry presence nudged my shoulder with a hard hoof, seeking my attention. Izzy, having surrendered Sparky so he could go and rescue his dad from suffering more collateral damage from the sister’s scuffle, had something to get off her chest. “Do you think they’ll have cloud cotton candy up there in Cloudsdale?” She asked with an endearing dip of her messy head.

Of course, that’s what got most of her attention about the old homeland of the pegasi. “... Cloud cotton candy?”

“Mhm!” She chirped. “You know? Cotton candy made of actual clouds! That would be, like, absolutely bananas!” She sent her hooves up in exclamation.

“Uh…” Leaving aside the fact that there’d be no actual difference between regular and cloud-made, I had not heard of said thing ever being sold in Cloudsdale. “Er… I can’t remember that being a thing, Izz. Sorry.” Izzy slumped down in disappointment with a sorrowful ‘awww’. “Not that there’d be pegasi there to whip some for us. Buuuut,” I reached and brought her muzzle up to cheer her back up. “We can totally try to make some here!” I sent a thumb toward the still-squabbling siblings. “Now that we have some pegasi to get some clouds for us.” Even if the end result would most likely be no different than munching on a raw cloud which, honestly, is more surprising than what you’d think. Very refreshing.

Izzy’s mood, known for swinging around like a broken metronome, was up to her usual pep in the blink of an eye. With her brightest grin, she went for a tender nuzzle of appreciation. However, my overgrown beard, which I’d totally forgotten to shave after my double-double shower, posed an impediment to her caressings, the hairs tickling her sensitive snout until a snort-like sneeze couldn't be helped.

“Heeey!” Izzy protested with a pout, rubbing her itchy nostrils before diving again for a second try, only to be met with the same results.

“Third’s the charm, fluffybutt.” I playfully egged her on. Sunny giggled at our antics, letting the unicorn have her time with me while resting against my opposite side, a hoof on her usual spot over my scar and rubbing tender circles over it, making the sensitive, damaged skin tickle under my shirt.

Snorting a puff of air, this time out of conviction, Izzy would have her nuzzles one way or another!

“...”

“... Sunnyyyy!” Izzy whined like a foal after another failure and another itchy nose.

“Something wrong, Izzy?” My mare replied with sass, making a point of nuzzling my exposed arm where the pathetic amount of hair wouldn't bother her sensitive snout.

“I can't properly nuzzle our cuddly alien with all this… beard in the middle!” She pouted, poking my cheek with her hoof in emphasis.

“I don't know, Izzy.” Sunny dressed in her bedroom eyes and ran a fetlock lovingly under my chin. “I, for one, find it quite charming.” She commented huskily while nipping said chin.

‘Pants getting a bit tight right now… Again.’

“Ugh.” Izzy’s features soured further. “Stupid stallions and their need for facial hair.” She fumed under her breath.

I felt the need to point out something. “You have facial hair too, Izzy. Quite a bit more than I do.”

“But mine’s not all spiky and itchy and… Bah, forget it. No nuzzles for you!” Izzy wiggled in her seat to face away from us, sticking her tongue out at us and going cross-hooved to fume in peace.

“Woe is me.” I lamented ‘dramatically’, but Sunny was quickly there to lift me up with her own dose of nuzzles, apparently unbothered by my stubborn facial hair as she sent as much love and warmth into her caressing as I did back petting her sides and mane. We did not miss the envious peeks Izzy sent over her shoulder, nor the way her ears would twitch in annoyance every time Sunny would giggle when I brushed over a ticklish spot on her belly, making us fall into hushed snickers at the unicorn’s expense.

“Um… Was geht…?”

A young, masculine voice greeted us from the entrance to the living room. I begrudgingly halted my moment with Sunny to gaze behind us. I found Gaius just around the entrance to the living room, standing awkwardly as if unsure whether to come and join us or not.

“Hey.” I greeted the hesitant griffon back, happy to see him finally down from his nest to join us. I welcomed him. “Come here, birdbrain. Don’t be a stranger.”

Flipping me the feather in good humor, a griffon-exclusive gesture which meant exactly what you’re thinking, he mustered the courage he somehow seemed to have lost from yesterday at the hospital room, and strolled inside the cozy living room, taking a seat on his haunches beside the couch I was occupying, with Sunny and a still pouting Izzy, earning a puzzled glance from the griffon before nervously toiling with the feathers of his chest fluff without finding much to add to the group.

He’d warm up. These ponies would make sure of it, willingly for the griffon or not. I would be sorry for him if I didn't know before it’d be so much fun.

However, the fun would have to wait for a later time. Gaius’ arrival meant everycreature was now present, and we had definitely lost track of time with our friendly bantering, as much as I wished we could stay like this ‘till the end of times.

No such luck for me. Time to address what had got us gathered here in the first place. “Guys.”

Ponies and griffons heeded my call, the sister’s taking a rest from headbutting one another, the older sending an apologetic look at her hubby, who exhaled in relief once finding himself safe from the pegasi’s combined wrath. A bounding Sparky giggled with a hatchling obliviousness, having enjoyed Zipp and Pipp's sisterly scuffle as if it was a game he wanted a part in. Izzy lost her pouting to gaze back at me, as so did Sunny with her loving caressing, yet remained where she was, if not a little tighter against my side, no doubt smelling the apprehension building inside me.

Gaius too tensed up a bit, wings trembling before he wiggled them into a more comfortable position, tail curled around his foreclaws.

Everycreature gave me their full attention, noticing the weight of my call.

Just like during the school year wrap-up play while I was in primary school, I froze a bit under their collective gazes, feeling some familiar, budding nerves rising up, a strange occurrence since I was well aware I was among family. My reluctance to share the journey's most… explicit details with them spoke highly of my hypocrisy, especially since I was the main protagonist of all of them. They were due an explanation, but at the same time, I wanted to spare their feelings from the worst Equestria and the lands beyond had to offer.

‘Is that truly what you want?’

I couldn’t just straight tell them I painted the floor with a bunch of thestral guards out of a whim and murdered a bunch of griffons, the lowest of scum as they were; to later learn how my royal-sized fuck-up had concluded with the extinction of the changeling race, one of the oldest races of this world, with me dealing the definitive blow to their Queen after delivering the killing one the day I tried to bring all creatures together under my vision!!

Fuck!! They deserved to know!!

It seemed her last wish would come true.

‘All theatrics, Empyrean…’

‘SHUT THE FUCK UP!!’

“So…” I focused on the present as I wetted my lips and hunched up in place, hands clenched in fists over my knees and a foot tapping on the floor with the jitters that slowly overcame me. I had no practiced speech to deliver, no tailored tale to offer. I hadn't allowed myself to conceive one. I wanted to share things raw. I had to find a middle point between what to share and what to downplay, or outright avoid…

‘They deserve to know!’

… But I could not do so out of selfishness to spare my own feelings. It would not be fair to them. But I dreaded even more what they’d think of me. I had feared so since the very first day they learned who I was. And they had been impossibly understanding with me. It felt like I was cheating on them somehow, like they loved and cherished an unreal version of me, the friendly and happy-go-lucky human of legend, even if I knew they had seen me at my lowest several times during the short months I’d known them.

‘Not at your lowest.’

… I was starting to feel detached.

‘Shutupshutupshutup or I swear to Faust…’

As the ponies settled down, ears up attentively, I spared one last glance towards Gaius, the only one to have shared my own experiences to a degree, mostly from the sidelines. I wanted him not to hide anything from whatever questions my family would undoubtedly have for him. A part of me wished to simply let him share our story and be done with it, let myself stew into the events we‘d lived through, and let my pony family help me through it, the story a hundred times told.

‘Selfish! Selfish! Fucking selfish! I need to be better!!!’

In the end, just before the atmosphere of expectancy derailed into one of awkward waiting, I launched into the tale of my journey to the west, feeling an icy dagger inch closer to my heart with every stage of the journey I narrated.

I spared them most of the boring parts, like the endless hours of walking through the vast expanses of a void Equestria, borderline growing mad from the silence and emptiness as my sole companion.

‘Sole companion?’

The gang showed a keen interest when I mentioned my encounter with the Thestrals. I portrayed our encounter as a big misunderstanding with a few busted heads as a consequence, but all were friends at the end.

“Woah, you sure kicked their flanks, didn't you?”

Zipp enthusiasm was gravely misplaced. I hadn’t kicked their butts in an epic fight for the annals of history. I’d trashed them through the moss and dirt, and barely let them walk out of that one with their lives.

I did not mention that part.

The ponies listened with rapt attention, mesmerized by the sights, sounds, and smells I painted in their imagination of the Thestral’s ancestral dwellings in Hollow Shades, intrigued by the figure of the Matriarch and our brief, but insightful conversation, and softened with the adorable thestral colt I had met on my stay at the infirmary.

“Wait.” Something clicked in Izzy. “You took my favorite cookies?!!”

Caught red-handed I was. “Oops…” I fired my most sheepish grin but clashed uselessly against Izzy’s bubbling wrath. Sunny, the mare of my heart, was quick to cool the unicorn down, not wanting to see the story interrupted. I promised I’d buy her ten boxes of the accursed cookies next time I was in the market.

Her ire was appeased, for the moment.

Winces and sympathetic grimaces were painted on their muzzles when it came the time to describe my encounters with some of the worst of Equestria’s unchecked wildlife. The manticore, yet another pack of timberwolves sneaking into my impromptu campsite on a cold night, another pack, this time of regular wolves for a change, all of whom got the pounce on me as I checked a trap I’d placed one night to see if I could catch a rabbit for breakfast the next morning. Which I did, but the wolves snatched it from me as I fended them off.

And many more nasty encounters I felt too drained to share deeply about. Needless to say, it hadn't been a walk through the park.

The time of meeting Gaius arrived, and I could feel in the air how the poor griffon froze up the closer I reached in my narrative. When the moment came to share our encounter, I shut my trap and peered at him, silently prompting him to share his own side of the story.

“Er…” Gaius couldn't find the words to jumpstart his side of the tale, nerves getting the best of him and turning him into a squirming statue of fur and feathers.

“Hey.” I softly called him, giving him a reassuring nod, transmitting that this was the safest place in the whole wide world to share his story. All of it.

Biting down his cheek, or the closest thing a griffon can do with a beak, Gaius swallowed the lump in his throat and proceeded. Slowly and timidly, as if fearing to be judged or called out at every word that came from his beak, Gaius shared the same things he’d shared with me that night in the cave, and the ponies' reactions were what you can guess.

As the events of the griff’s misfortune unraveled out of his beak, my family’s expressions turned from shocked, to amazed, to sorrowful, to angry again, to finally devastated when they learned about the destruction of his village, to his capture by the slavers and our fortunate encounter when I became their reluctant prisoner, too.

Somehow reading my thoughts, or perhaps taking note of how much stiffer I got the closer his narration approached the moment I put the slavers to the blade, gore aplenty and without a trace of resentment. He was gracious enough to omit the most bloody details and simply wrapped it up to me giving them a ‘lesson they’d never forget’.

And yet, something told me the ponies knew exactly what the griffon was trying to ease into them, but decided not to comment on it. I didn’t know whether to be happy or concerned about it.

‘They know who you are...’

He was done with his part as concluding with the events of that night, back in the musty, narrow cave we’d a little heart-to-heart with one another. Izzy, who was closest to the unfortunate griffon, snatched him up from the floor in a deadlock, lifting the poor ‘birdy’ up from his rump and crashing them both on the sofa, forcing me and Sunny to scooch aside hurriedly so as to not get trumped by them. With Izzy nuzzling the flummoxed griffon, trying her best to drill into Gaius’ feathery head that he’d be safe with us and that nothing bad like that would ever happened to him for as long as she was around.

While warmed by Izzy’s concern, and unable to fight off an embarrassed blush, Gaius took her attempts in stride and awkwardly sent his wings around her to return the hug.

All the ponies’ hearts went out to him, condemning the slavers’ actions and inequine mistreatment, as well as aching for the traumatizing loss of his family and entire village.

One pony, in particular, was more heated up with Gaius’ tale than the rest, his sense of justice speaking loud for him.

“Those low-life, slithering scum!” Hitch seethed under clenched teeth, making sure to cover little Sparky’s ears in advance, although the little drake was blissfully lost in watching some cartoons on his dad’s phone. A smart move, since the contents of this story were not meant for the little guy’s ears. “How could they be a part of it, much less staying put and letting it happen?!!”

One thing that had bothered him particularly was the fact that ponies were amongst the interested buyers for the unusual griffon when the salvers had dragged Gaius from place to place trying to make a profit off him. Considering how the worst side he’d glimpsed from his fellow ponies was simply a misguided colt thinking himself emperor of the Bay and throwing a giant robot at a lighthouse, your usual Thursday; it was expected that this new light painted over his fellow equines drove him up the wall. Zipp was there to place a calming wing around the puffing sheriff, pressing herself against him but sharing his disappointment in her own kind all the same.

“Not all ponies are cute and friendly, like you guys,” I added, finding our current accommodations a bit uncomfortable over the couch. Feeling the place becoming crammed up, I took hold of Sunny and gently placed her on my lap, leaving some free space for Gaius to properly sit straight between me and a still-clinging Izzy, making his best to ignore the bawling unicorn’s number. Placing an arm around his feathery shoulder, I smiled down at him with brotherly affection. “Just like not all griffons are heartless, avaricious jerks.”

Gaius’ features lit up with a thankful smile of his own. We shared a warm moment until he felt Izzy’s nuzzles go from reassuring and sympathetic to outright intrusive. With a squawk of annoyance, he pushed the clingy unicorn to her end of the couch with a wing, Izzy riling up in protest, claiming he was too fluffy to miss.

Those two were gonna become great friends, I was starting to believe.

Hugging Sunny against my chest, and using her scalp to rest my chin as I felt her forelegs fold cutely over my enveloping arms, I used her as my warm anchor when my turn came to pick up the thread of the story.

‘Tell them, Empyrean.’

I told them of our misfortune learning of the owner of that cave, which in truth happened to be a den, and the epic battle that then ensued with the chimera. The rest of the days after were pretty uneventful, thank Faust, so I skipped over most of the rest of the trip. I simply added a few funny moments that had transpired between Gaius and me, to the griffon’s visible chagrin.

I, myself, could feel in my very own words how relieved I truly was at having gained a traveling companion, unusual as he was, but who was I to talk?

Time of truth. I couldn't continue to delay it any longer.

“... It must have been around the… uh, sixteenth day, I think? Yeah. Yeah, I think so.” I was losing my courage, the thread of the tale slipping through my fingers. They deserve to know. “Hard to tell after a while. We were talking about an old friend of mine, a true sunshine of a griffon, when… when…”

Her empty, lifeless eyes bore down at me with the pain of an entire race behind her, with the strength of a broken promise and a shattered legacy.

They were dead. They were all dead.

‘Because of you.’

Because of me.

Why?

Why?!!

‘Why…?’