Chapters There comes a time in everyone’s life when a simple question must be asked: ‘What do I do with myself today?’ It was a question that Sunset Shimmer had asked herself many times, and this was one such time. It wouldn’t be nearly so problematic if the very asking of that question didn’t highlight how the answer was not self-evident.
The go-to answer would typically be to start thinking about how to work on projects she had going on. Idle hooves on a day where she was feeling restless was a recipe for dissatisfaction, so getting right into the thick of it seemed like a good idea.
The problem, of course, was that she had nothing to work on right now. She had long since dropped her ambitions of social engineering (though “conquest” was a more apt term), so there weren’t plans to go over, and she had nothing lying around that she could get up to her elbows in. There was always some housework that she could do, but with a home that wasn’t even legally hers, what did it really matter? If anything, working on it would draw attention to it, and that’s the precise opposite of what she needed.
She could always look at better alternatives for residency. She had a place now, sure, but it was a dump, and living in it was constantly balancing on the razor’s edge. At any time she could get ousted and then wind up on the street again, and that was not a place Sunset had any desire to return to. She wasn’t quite sure how she’d gotten away with it for as long as she had, and while she was lucky there, some stability in her living conditions would not go amiss. Less anxiety about that would also be nice.
And the problem with that was living somewhere costs money. She could get some, sure, easy enough…but employers require paperwork. Paperwork she didn’t have, and could never have, because she was not a legal resident of this country. She wasn’t a legal resident of any country on earth. You know what sounded fun, compared to opening that can of worms? Anything else.
Okay, fine, so nothing that mattered could be worked on. What was left?
Little else. Because if it didn’t matter, it didn’t matter, and wasn’t really worth her attention on account of, by definition, not mattering.
Sunset breathed in through her nose, then let it back out in an agitated sigh. The statue in the CHS courtyard was cool against her back where she leaned on it, and she let her gaze find the stairs to the entrance to the high school, arms crossed over her chest and one foot against the statue idly.
Classes had been dismissed about an hour ago. The busses had long since vacated the premises, and now all that remained were a few teachers and students attending some extracurricular things, both of whom were beginning to exit the building themselves in a slow, increasingly irregular trickle. It wouldn’t be too long before it was dinner time, and nobody was willing to miss that.
…well, Sunset could name at least one mare who’d be willing, especially if you dangled something literature-based in front of her. She was back in Equestria, though.
Lucky her.
Sunset shook her head, rattling that thought free from her mind’s eye as she tried to focus on something else. Something productive. Easier said than done, though, and once again did Sunset’s thoughts do another lap around the ring of frustration they’d been spinning around for the better part of an hour.
That was one perk of being the bad guy: it was easy to come up with things to do. At least when she had her ambitions, she had felt a sense of purpose. The way forward wasn’t always well defined, sure, but she knew what her end goal was, and connecting the dots was something she could easily work out, given the time and means to do so. If she lacked the means, that then became the next thing she’d pursue, and if she lacked means to acquire those means, there again was the way forward…on and on, for however long it took her to get to where she wanted to be. There was always a plan, or a potential for a plan. Morality being an afterthought only made the whole process easier; less restrictions meant more options to pursue the ends she sought, and less hoops to hop through oftentimes meant a more straightforward advance.
Now, though? There was no goal. Well, no, there was ‘be a better person,’ but that wasn’t something tangible, something she could wrap her hands around and grip and pull and shape and work with. That was an idea. A noble one, maybe, but a vague yet noble idea wasn’t going to put food on the table, or solve her living situation, or serve as a tool to apply to a problem, or give her a half-decent idea of how to spend her evening other than standing here brooding against this statue in front of a school building that, by all rights, she should not even be attending. Hell, she shouldn’t even be allowed to stand here. She should be in a prison somewhere, or strapped to a table at the bottom of a government lab, being peeled open like a grapefruit for all her juicy insights about what unicorns were like and how they worked and whether or not they tasted good when they were chopped up and cooked, like humans seemed to do with every other four-legged creature that they didn’t decide was a plague vector.
Sunset pinched the bridge of her nose. She took a long, level breath, then breathed it slowly back out in a controlled stream through barely-parted lips.
A short, sharp hiccup of a car horn sounded off nearby, and Sunset couldn’t help but glance in the direction of it. It took only a moment to collect herself from being jarred from her thoughts enough to recognize the car parked on the side of the road, and with a small smile and a slight shake of her head to herself, she pushed off of the statue and began to make her way over.
The station wagon that sat there looked remarkably out of place by virtue of just how old it was. Whereas other cars were sleek and rounded and painted in solid colors, this vehicle was made up of flat edges, halfway covered in a color scheme intended to mimic wood, the other half painted a shade of turquoise that modern cars simply didn’t come in. Everything about it screamed ‘old person car,’ even though the weight of the ages had been visibly kept at bay by diligent care and maintenance, and probably an unreasonable amount of money. It wasn’t the kind of vehicle you ever expected to see outside of a magazine, and certainly not belonging to the person sitting in the driver’s seat.
Sunset Shimmer couldn’t help from adopting the half-swagger she picked up as she strolled over to the awaiting car. When she finally reached it, she leaned up against the door with her forearm, her other hand on her hip, and she tilted her head forward as though to look past an imaginary set of sunglasses at the driver through the open window. “Ma’am, you realize there’s no parking here after school hours? I’m gonna need you to scram.”
Rarity looked up from her phone she’d been studying, peering up over the edge of her actually-existent designer’s sunglasses in a manner that rather convincingly read as though she had not seen Sunset coming, or in fact been the one to summon her over. ”Very sorry officer,” she replied loftily, “but I’m afraid my hands are rather tied here. You see, I’m awaiting a dear friend of mine, and I simply cannot bear the thought of leaving without her.”
“Are you now?”
“Quite.” Rarity’s gaze left Sunset to tap a line out on her phone’s touch screen. “Perhaps you’ve heard of her? I’m told Sunset Shimmer frequents these parts.”
Sunset nodded along pseudo-thoughtfully. “The name rings a bell. I hear she’s trouble, though. What’s a finely-crafted young lady like you doing waiting around for trouble like that?”
Rarity shrugged flippantly without looking up. “What can I say? I enjoy a little bit of trouble now and then.”
“Might be in some soon if I don’t see some license and registration. How much have you had to drink today?”
This earned a look from Rarity, who peered up from over the edge of her sunglasses in a way that would look far more indignant if she wasn’t smiling. “Get in the car, darling.”
The cocky smirk of the cop routine finally broke into a proper grin. Sunset pushed off of the driver door to walk around to enter through the passenger side, chuckling as she did.
“How much have I had to drink today,” Rarity repeated in a disbelieving tone, talking around the sound of the passenger door firmly shutting. “Not enough, firstly, and secondly, how dare you?”
“Hey,” Sunset put up one hand innocently as she buckled up. “Someone’s gotta give you some flak.”
“Oh please, as though I don’t get enough of that already?” The station wagon’s engine roared briefly as the engine began with a start, then mellowed back out as Rarity jostled the stick shift from park. “I’ve had more than my share from Sweetie Belle today.”
Speaking of whom, Sunset flicked her gaze to the pristine leather seats in the back of the vehicle, halfway expecting to see one of three faces that she did not end up seeing. “No company today?”
“Mercifully not. I’ve done my due diligence already.”
“Sleepover?”
“Oh I highly doubt sleep is going to be involved at any point,” came the wry retort, “but ostensibly yes.”
Sunset considered briefly to speak the thought that came to mind - how it seemed more like Sweetie slept over at Rarity’s house and lived at her friends’ - but decided not to touch that topic. Conversation lulled for a brief time as Sunset turned her head out the window, watching the world begin to swiftly pass by as Rarity pulled out onto the main road away from the school. “Where are we going, anyway?”
“Haven’t decided yet,” Rarity replied whimsically. “Have you eaten?”
“Nope.”
“What sounds good?”
“Uhh,” Sunset said lamely, feeling a little put on the spot. She fumbled over a couple of ideas, but she still felt like she barely knew most of the places around here, despite having lived here for several years. Nothing she did know jumped out at her. “I dunno.”
Rarity tsk’d. “Well we’ll have to think of something, because I really don’t feel like cooking today.”
“I dunno. Pizza?”
The response was almost automatic: “Alright, Rainbow.”
Sunset put up her hands in defense. “Well hey, it’s not my fault pizza always sounds good!”
“Alright, Rainbow.” Rarity glanced over her shoulder briefly before toggling her blinker to shift lanes. “I seem to have picked up the wrong girl from school today, hate when that happens.”
“Rainbow wishes she was this hot.”
The most unladylike laugh escaped Rarity’s throat of its own volition, and she did little to stop it. “Careful, darling, your humility is showing.”
“Hey, it’s a Friday. Gotta let it all hang out once in a while.”
“It’s Thursday,” Rarity deadpanned.
Sunset didn’t miss a beat: “Hey, it’s Thursday. Gotta let it all hang out once in a while.”
Rarity rolled her eyes with a touch of a smile. “I think you may just have a thing about not tucking in, darling.”
“You complaining?”
“Merely critiquing. A lady should always aspire to hold herself in the most dignified manner possible, even when no one is around to look.”
“Someone is around to look, though.” Sunset leaned over on one arm against the divider, a coy smirk in her voice. “And I know you look.”
“I look at a lot of things, that’s hardly relevant.”
“Could be.”
“Could not be,” Rarity replied innocently, shrugging one shoulder. “Who’s to say, truly?”
“Dunno, I think the wandering eyes say a lot.”
Though her gaze remained fixed on the road ahead of her, Rarity’s voice possessed a curl to it that perfectly matched the minxish smile on her lips when she replied, “I’m allowed to look.”
Sunset’s smirk deepened. Though no further dialogue followed this particular line of conversation, something of a conversation was nonetheless had in the form of the playful silence and mutual grin that felt much favorable to and more intimate than actual words.
They never actually decided on where they should eat. Sunset was not feeling particularly inspired at the idea of eating in general, but also didn’t feel like playing the ‘I’m not hungry,’ ‘oh but you have to eat something darling’, ‘no I’m okay honest,’ ‘are you sure’ game, and so when Rarity brought them to a drive-thru, she didn’t offer any resistance and pointed at the first thing that sounded half-decent on the menu…then the second thing, after looking at the price associated with the first. Rarity likely wouldn’t have protested, but the look on her face definitely bore signs of relief when Sunset suddenly changed her mind.
It was only when Sunset was in the process of unwrapping her burger that she noticed the label on the wrapper, and on the bag it had come from, and realized that it was McDonald’s. She glanced over at Rarity as the car’s engine cut and she began to fish out her own meal from the bag, making idle commentary about the sorry state of this parking lot all the while.
There was something deeply amusing about this whole situation, though she couldn’t quite put her finger on why. Something about it being Rarity, of all people...
“And what are you smiling at?” came the lighthearted challenge from that very girl. “You can resume ogling after you’ve eaten, darling.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Sunset chuckled, ceasing her staring to pay attention to the…what had she ordered again? Sandwich. Yeah, whatever. A Mc-something-or-other. She bit into it.
“And don’t talk with your mouth full.”
“Ah dihn’d.”
“Really? Because you just did.”
Sunset rolled her eyes. Rarity giggled.
The mundanity, Sunset would eventually decide over her meal. It was the mundanity of it all. Rarity, this high-class, stylish, (relatively) wealthy, attractive young woman, more or less slumming it out with the homeless illegal immigrant in a McDonald’s parking lot, eating cheap food because that’s just what they ended up getting and didn’t feel like getting out of the car was a symphony of contradictions, and it seemed to fly in the face of everything that Rarity stood for, at least on the surface. Part of her suspected Rarity was only being caught dead putting this fast food in her mouth because it seemed like something Sunset would eat, but after having gotten to know her for a while, Sunset couldn’t bring herself to earnestly buy into that theory. She was not the stereotypical pretty girl who obsessed about every minutia of her appearance that her pride in her looks and attentiveness about style would suggest, and she also wasn’t the sort to demean herself for the sake of meeting someone else on their level. That would likewise imply that Rarity held herself above Sunset, and that simply was not the case. If anything, she thought rather highly of Sunset.
Sunset caught a glimpse of dark thoughts as they began to circle overhead, and she swerved to avoid them. “Got any plans tonight?”
Rarity made a noise in response to this, though any actual words were delayed until the fries being deposited into her mouth were swallowed. “Am I being inquired upon, or propositioned?”
“Uhh.” There was a beat of silence, which was then punctuated with a shrugging response of, “Maybe? I don’t really, uhh…just asked.”
“Right...” Rarity began the process of scrubbing her fingers clean of any residual evidence of the meal she’d been eating using the tangle of napkins provided. “Well, I suppose that depends.”
“On?”
“Do you have any plans tonight?”
“Not really.” Been months since I’ve had the luxury. “What, you planning on being my plans?”
“If you’ll have me,” came the playful response. “I figured, you know…I’ve got a free day, perhaps we can spend the rest of the evening in person, rather than over the phone?”
“Heh.” Sunset rubbed the back of her neck with a small bashful smile. “I mean, if you want to. I don’t really know how to uh…I mean, like, I was kinda just standing around, and I don’t really know how to budget time for two here. I’m having a hard enough time with one.”
“Now that I am not concerned with,” Rarity declared as the crumpled napkins were discarded to the spent meal bag. “If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the last few weeks, darling, it’s that even just sitting with you, blathering back and forth all the while, is thoroughly entertaining. We could sit here in this parking lot, even.” A beat. “Let’s not, though.”
“Yeah, let’s not,” Sunset chuckled, buckling back in as Rarity started the station wagon up. “Unless you’re really itching to meet your dealer out here or something.”
Rarity rolled her eyes at this, twisting about in her seat as she reversed them out of the parking space they’d been occupying. “While so very tempting, tragically, I left my needles back home.”
“No big deal, I’m sure there’s some spares in these bushes out here.”
“Oh god, Sunset.”
“Waste not!” Combined with how utterly appalled Rarity sounded and the growing horror on her face, Sunset couldn’t help but laugh.
In the lapse of conversation that followed, Rarity pulled the station wagon out of the McDonalds parking lot and merged onto the highway for the quick jaunt it took to get back to a road that lead to the side of town that Sunset was significantly more familiar with, as it’s where she’d spent most of her time. She had never been gifted with the arcane knowledge that was how to drive a car, what with being ineligible for it by way of being an alien invader from planet Pony, so outside of the places she had convinced Flash Sentry to ferry her to and from, her area of familiarity was essentially anything that didn’t take more than an hour or two to walk to from where she was currently living. Most of Canterlot was still unfamiliar to her, and there was at least half of the city she had never seen at all except as it passed swiftly by while on route to some other destination.
It wasn’t all that different from how it was in her own Canterlot, thinking on it. The human equivalent was bigger, for sure, if not as grand, but it seemed to her - at least, at a glance - that she knew this Canterlot about as well as the one she had grown up in. There was too much of the city for her to see, and her interests did not extend throughout the whole of it, so large swathes of the capital simply fell outside of her notice to the point that it may as well not exist, and when it did come up, it felt foreign and unfamiliar, despite being a piece of the city she had always lived in.
Sunset pondered whether or not this was some effect of the portal and the relationship between Equestria and the mirror world. As often proved the case, it could go either way. It’s just how it had worked out on this end, logistically, though it was difficult to completely discount the possibility of some manner of influence from the world itself. It tried to keep just about everything as close to one-to-one as it could between both worlds, from what could be observed of it, with varying amounts of success. Sometimes it was eerie how it kept things in line with things on the other side, and like she had many times in the past, Sunset wondered to herself just how deep it went, and how it prioritized keeping things as close to a mirror image as possible. Without seeing the process at work - if such a thing could be seen at all - and with no real knowledge of the mechanics behind it, it was impossible to know. In spite of this, or perhaps because of it, the possibilities were nearly limitless. It was hard not to feel the ground sway beneath one’s feet as one looked over the edge into a fathomless abyss of unknowables that made up everything around her, every possibility as potentially great as they were frightening in scope.
Sunset didn’t like to think too hard about it, most of the time. The kind of existential questions that the mirror world raised ranged from unsettling to spiral-inducing, and being an inquisitive mind at her core, Sunset was aware that thinking too long or hard on this particular topic was not good for her mental health. In saying that, though, she was an inquisitive mind at her core, and there were days where madness seemed like it wasn’t such a steep price to pay in exchange for finding out precisely how deep the rabbit hole went. After all, what is peace of mind if it means living in ignorance? Knowledge is power, after all, and it’s power that lets you reshape the world. Is blind, dumb, and helpless to your environment really living?
...listen to me. Really does explain how I ended up here, huh?
“Sunset.”
Sunset reacted with a start, turning her head from the window and blinking her eyes back into focus. “Huh?”
Rarity had her head pointed forward at the road, though her gaze was very much sidelong at Sunset. A ghost of a frown found her lips as her eyes flicked to the road again. “You’ve been rather distant today, darling.”
It took Sunset a second or two more to collect herself after having had the gears in her head shifted so abruptly. She cleared her throat quietly, turning her head from Rarity to the road to view the city passing by. “I guess.”
“Are you okay?”
The knee jerk response was to brush it off, but the sincerity of the question and the earnest tone in Rarity’s voice demanded some other response, one Sunset wasn’t prepared to offer. “I’m,” she started, forgetting almost immediately what she meant to follow that with - if she had anything in mind at all - and waved a hand vaguely, expecting something good to respond with to present itself. It didn’t, and the raised hand flopped back to her lap with a faint sound of skin slapping against fabric.
Such a simple question. It should be simple to answer. And yet…
After several long seconds of fruitlessly ponderous quiet, Sunset shook her head. Her vexed gaze returned to the window of the door she leaned against. “I dunno.”
Rarity didn’t say anything at first. When she did speak again, though, her voice was as soft as it was heartfelt. “You know that I care about you, right?”
Sunset swallowed, and her awareness briefly touched on the rubber band that felt like it was bound around her windpipe. “Yeah.”
Though she wasn’t looking at her, Sunset could hear the small smile in Rarity’s voice as she replied, “I’m glad.”
“Sometimes I wonder why, though.” Sunset didn’t think about saying it, but the words happened all the same. “I feel like you could do better than…y’know.”
“I’m not sure that I do know, darling, now that you mention it. What do you mean?”
Sunset reached into her mind to pull up her thoughts, but as she did, the shutters came down hard. Her half-gesture halted and the raised hand fell to her lap a second time, landing lifelessly on her thigh. Once again, Sunset shook her head, what focus she could manage locking onto the way that the street outside the window streaked by. “I dunno.”
A second or two of silence preceded a response. “Well,” Rarity began slowly, voice sounding like how down feathers felt, “if you ever figure it out, I’d be interested in hearing about it, should you feel like sharing.” The car swayed gently in unison with a steady turning of the steering wheel. “I’m always glad for another reason to hear your voice.”
Sunset bit back a scoff. In spite of the storm clouds that had gathered in her mind, she still found it in herself to mutter back, “It helps that you’re nice to talk to.”
“I'm glad you think so, darling. I feel the same way.” Though there weren't eyes ready to see it at the time, Rarity's wry, playful little smile could be felt quite clearly in the brief pause. "I've quite the phone bill to prove it. Won't be the last, I suspect, and frankly, I couldn't be happier for it."
One corner of Sunset’s lips tugged up, and remained up.
Nothing more was said on that topic, or any other topic, for a while. Still halfway under a cloak of choking storm clouds in her mind, Sunset was not entirely sure when it happened, just that at some point during their drive, Rarity’s hand had ended up resting against her arm where it had fallen to her lap, and had not moved for quite some time. Sunset didn’t mean to, but her focus went fully into the contact, mapping it out in great detail. Rarity’s palm was nearly flat against her forearm, the long, slender fingers making it to about the halfway point between her elbow and wrist. The skin felt warm - surprisingly warm, but not unpleasantly so. It felt like sunlight, though with a comforting weight behind it. A sun-warmed blanket, perhaps, left out to take in the rays, now sharing the comfort with the girl beneath it.
Sunset was tempted to look. She didn’t, though, for whatever reason. The hand resting on her arm didn’t move, nor did the contact stop. They didn’t talk about it, either, but that was fine. If time with Rarity had taught Sunset anything, it's that you can say a lot with silence.
A fair bit of time passed like that. Sunset didn't keep track of it, nor pay much attention to anything that wasn't Rarity or the sound of the road. Occasionally she would glance up at the scenery as it whisked by, sometimes making distant note of something, and it was at some point during this indeterminate stretch of time that Sunset recognized a building that she had seen earlier which she knew was close to the high school.
This realization was made with a slight lifting of the head. "Are we going in circles?"
"Something close to them, yeah." Rarity lifted her hand on Sunset's arm to flick on a blinker, though she placed it back down in roughly the same spot, still not seeing fit to acknowledge the contact. "I wasn't sure where to go in particular, so..."
"Just kinda going nowhere, huh?"
Rarity shrugged casually, completing a turn at a corner that they'd visited at least twice now. "Did you have somewhere you wanted to go?"
Sunset made a noncommittal noise, adjusting her posture in her seat in a manner that her back muscles agreed with a little more. Her arm under Rarity's hand remained undisturbed. "Honestly, I'm happy like this."
"Same, I think." Rarity glanced up at her rear-view mirror briefly, then found the road again, her posture seeming more relaxed when they had started some amount of time ago. "I enjoy driving in general, though. There's not much to think about while you're on the road, you're just...in transit. Watch the road, pedal down..."
"And don't die in a horrible wreck."
"Preferably, yes," Rarity chuckled. "It's not so bad on this side of town, though heaven help you if there's so much of a drop of rain on the pavement. You'd think the world itself was coming to an end."
Sunset smiled a little bit to the sound of Rarity's chuckling, but otherwise didn't respond.
"Do they have cars in Equestria, darling?"
"No, nothing like this." Sunset's eyes tracked another car as it passed them by, going the opposite direction at speeds that most pegasi would be quite happy to cruise at, though maybe not so close to the ground. "There's wagons and carriages, but nothing self-powered. Well," she corrected herself quickly, "no, I guess there's some self-powered stuff, but not like..."
"Nothing mechanical, I imagine."
"No, not at all. Not with material power sources, anyway. It's all magic, and...honestly it's not really great for transportation? Not unless you're going really far out to a major city or something. It's just like, needlessly complex to have stuff like this when you could get a carriage to take you across town. If you've gotta go really far, then you're talking like, a fly-team or something, and that's not a super big deal either, just hit up the flyport. There's always guys around there." A second passed, then Sunset looked at Rarity. "Why?"
Rarity shrugged nonchalantly. "Just curious. Your world doesn't come up all that often, and you've been happy to share when it has."
"I guess." Sunset looked ahead, watching Rarity change lanes, though she didn't know enough about driving to know whether or not it was needed. She assumed it was. "It's nice to talk about home sometimes. I don't get to much."
"I figure it's a tricky topic to bring up..."
"Not at all," Sunset deadpanned. "People are very receptive and totally believing when you explain you're actually secretly a unicorn trapped in a human body from a world made up of technicolor ponies ruled by the gods of the sun and moon. They've got these real cozy rooms they'll let you stay in for free, too. Nice and padded."
Rarity snort-laughed once, then caught herself before it went any further, though the smile was stubbornly persistent. "I'm sorry, darling, I shouldn't laugh."
"Guess I'll take the clown makeup off, then. Deny me my every pleasure, why don't you."
"I mean it," Rarity managed, chuckling despite herself. "I mean, it's good that you can laugh about it, but I have to imagine it's hard to have to keep all of that under lock and key. You always seem so happy to share with me."
Sunset shrugged, gaze drifting to the side, once again peering out the window to her right as her reflection's small smile faded. "Don't really have anyone else I can talk to about it, I guess."
"You could share with the others?" Rarity offered. "I'm sure you could spin any number of stories to wow Rainbow, and Applejack and Fluttershy would probably love to hear about life in a pony world. I know for certain Pinkie would be delighted to learn about celebrations from a foreign culture, too."
This was....more than likely true. Sunset had no reason to doubt Rarity on it - not that she even necessarily needed to take her word for it - but even still, she found herself shifting somewhat in her seat at the thought of it. "I dunno. Feels kinda weird."
"How so, darling?"
Sunset devoted several seconds to contemplating this, though by the end of it she simply shrugged, unsure of how to vocalize her thoughts on it.
Rarity waited a little, taking her eyes off the light she had stopped at to watch Sunset. When she did not respond further, she said, "Well...is it alright if I talk to the girls about it, should it come up? You needn't be the one to do it if you don't want to."
"I...guess?" It still felt weird. "I dunno when that would ever come up, though."
"You'd be surprised. The girls ask about you a lot."
"Do they?" The surprise was as plain in Sunset's voice as it was on her face as she turned her head to look at Rarity. "About what?"
"This and that," came the casual response, head bobbing either way in conjunction with a shrug. "Nothing in particular, really, just...generally interested in how you've been lately."
"Why?"
Another shrug, much like the first. "I guess because we've been talking so much lately, they figure I would know better about your situation."
"Have you been talking about like, the calls and stuff?"
"Some." Rarity glanced from the road back to Sunset. "Just that it's happened, nothing about like, what we've talked about. Is that alright, darling?"
Sunset had to ask that question herself. She hadn't realized that she had been sitting up straighter throughout this conversation, and after a moment she eased back into her seat, trying to relax again. "I guess so."
"I was only half-joking in that first call, darling." Rarity caught a glimpse of the light changing overhead, and the station wagon started forward again, picking up speed steadily. "I can keep a secret, and as far as I'm concerned, everything that's said between us stays between us. I know you value your privacy."
Sunset didn't have a response for that.
"Besides..." Rarity's tone softened, and Sunset was once again reminded of the hand on her arm when Rarity gave it a gentle squeeze. "Some things aren't meant to be shared."
It was a small smile, the rosy one that made its way to her lips, but one that couldn't be stopped if she tried.
Another long, comfortable silence rolled over them, and Sunset let herself be lost to it for as long as she was able to. It wasn't long - or at least, it didn't feel long, it could have been hours - before Rarity spoke back up again, muttering irritably, "Damn it, again."
Sunset glanced over at her. Upon recognizing the tone, she glanced out the window, noting the way that the lighting had changed over time and the street lights had turned on, and then glanced at the clock on the dashboard. She couldn't help but crack a grin at the number that was significantly larger than it was last time she'd bothered to check it. "The curse lives on."
"Every time!" Rarity huffed, flicking a look over her shoulder to see if she could adjust course quickly without cutting someone off. She removed her hand from Sunset's arm for the first time in what had possibly been an hour in order to do so more swiftly before the corner she meant to take passed them by. "We really need to find that hole, find out where all that time has been falling into every time we get together. It's very inconvenient."
"I'll keep an eye out, let you know what I find."
"Splendid, do keep me informed. I'm having no luck on my end." One more turn, and Rarity's quick maneuvering relaxed a bit, as did her apparent huffiness. "Where would you like me to drop you off?"
"Oh, uh..." She had not considered that. "Just kinda anywhere, I guess."
Rarity frowned, somewhat expectedly. "I can take you straight home, darling."
"It's fine," Sunset said smoothly, taking the opportunity to roll her shoulders back in a good stretch to appear more at ease. "I like walks at night anyway. I haven't had one in a couple of days."
"Well, if you're certain...I'd rather you get home before it gets too dark out, though. What's close by?"
Sunset shrugged, giving their surroundings outside the car a cursory glance. "I dunno, where's your house at?"
"Five minutes that way?" Rarity gestured vaguely west.
"Yeah, that's perfect. I'll just walk from there."
Rarity still didn't seem totally at peace with the idea, but she offered no further resistance to it.
Much like the car that she'd been granted by her parents (there was frankly no other explanation for this station wagon that Sunset had been willing to accept beyond that her parents owned it, at least at one point), the house that Rarity lived in was best described by the age bracket of its owners, which was apparently "old person." Sunset was no architect, so she couldn't place exactly what it was about the structure that made it feel that way, but that was how it felt. Perhaps it was the "classical" vibe that the two-story home gave off, in spite of the pinks and purples that dominated its color scheme, though it also could have been the neighborhood. It was an older part of town, by the feel of it, and her own brief tours through this part of Canterlot had always given an impression of being on the more quiet side of things. Wealthy and old people lived out here, for the most part, with Rarity and her little sister being something of an island of youth...though surely her own parents weren't that old. Or maybe they were?
Sunset's considerations on the topic were cut off by the sound of the engine stopping, followed shortly by the clicking of a seatbelt coming undone. She followed suit, though she somewhat loathed to do so, in part because it meant their meeting was coming to an end, but also because she'd been sitting for the last four hours and her back was not much favoring the idea of contorting in a hurry.
To sounds of exertion, Rarity wryly asked, "Need some help there?"
"Just unfolding my spine like a lawn chair, don't mind me..."
"It sounds like it." Rarity chuckled, coming around the front of the vehicle where she'd parked it in the driveway, outside of the garage. It was still plenty light out to see the amusement on her face as she came up to Sunset, who was currently standing while doubled over, hands on her back. "I know a very good chiropractor, if that's going to be necessary."
"I'll get back to you on that one." In saying that, Sunset stood back upright, stepping aside to allow the door to be shut, and let out a loud sigh. "Back surgery I'm due for aside, that was pretty nice."
"It was, wasn't it?" Rarity flashed a smile as she brushed a strand of hair out of her eyes. "We should do it again sometime. Or something like it, at least."
"I was gonna say, yeah. I don't want to crank up your gas bill and your phone bill."
"Well there's a delightful solution to that!"
"Yup, bucking off, you'll never see me again." Sunset turned on a heel and did not manage to get a single step away before she was promptly yanked back around by the arm, where she threw up her hands in defense amidst laughter. "Kidding! I'm kidding."
"You'd best be!" Rarity huffed, hands planting on her hips. "I certainly haven't spent this much time with you just to have you bugger off into the wilderness on me. What I was going to say is..." The apparent annoyance dropped away, in favor of a tone that almost sounded a little bashful. "Perhaps maybe...go to the mall or something?"
"Ehh..." Sunset rubbed the back of her neck. "I've kinda been the source of a lot of expenses for you lately, Rarity, I dunno if I want to keep having you hoof the bill all the time."
"Foot."
Sunset blinked. Her blank stare lasted all of a second and a half before she considered her wording, and then chuckled, "Right."
Rarity shook her head slightly with a smile. "I promise it's no trouble, darling, but if it makes you feel better, we can always just walk around. I drove us around in circles for about three and a half hours, and that was just fine. We can make it work on foot."
"Oh, I'm sure about that." Sunset gave it another half-second of thought and shrugged. "Yeah, it's- we can do that, yeah, whenever. Did you have a time, or..?"
"Doing anything tomorrow evening?"
"As a matter of fact, yeah, there's this really cool girl who wanted to do some stuff with me, mostly like walk around in circles and stuff? It's kinda weird, but she gives me things sometimes, so I can't complain."
"That sounds like it'll be a splendid time." Rarity giggled, and Sunset couldn't help but mirror her. "Well I wish you the very best with that, perhaps I'll meet someone while I'm at it? Someone charismatic and funny and looking oh so dashing with her red and yellow striped hair..."
"Why would you want that? Sounds like you're meeting a loser."
"Oh get out of here," Rarity gave Sunset a playful shove, who took it and used the momentum to start her walk away. "I'll pick you up after school, don't be late! Walk safe, darling!"
Sunset gave Rarity a wave as she picked up her leisurely pace to a more proper walking speed. The smile on her face lasted well after she turned away from the house and the girl standing outside it, unbothered by the chill of the autumn steadily closing in as the sun began the process of leaving the waking world to its own devices for the night.
Sunset breathed a light, happy sigh to herself as she heard the door to Rarity's house close, stuffing her hands into her pockets. She hadn't even made it to the end of the street and already her mind was cycling back through interactions that had happened, replaying conversations and occasionally emitting a quiet chuckle to herself here and there at what she remembered of one of Rarity's many reactions where they'd been entertaining.
There had been a few things that weren't purely entertaining, though, and her mind inevitably touched on them. The smile died down as Sunset thought back on some of the things that had been said, in particular their brief conversation on opening up to her friends about Equestria.
She supposed, somewhere between her home and Rarity's, that maybe there was some wisdom in the suggestion. She couldn't imagine a world where her friends were dis interested, though maybe a little...confused? No, not confused...she searched for a word, and eventually she settled on "unsure." She had some rapport going already, having been friends with them for a few months now and...yeah, they generally seemed to trust her, certainly, so it's not like they'd disbelieve her, though they might be a little unsure of what to think exactly about it all. It was a lot to take in, believable or not. She was no stranger to how she looked to someone who wasn't informed about all the more fantastical elements of what stories she had to offer; being the catalyst of the rainbow lasers that they'd blasted her with on that fateful day didn't make it any less otherworldly or alien to someone who'd simply never dealt with anything vaguely like it before.
That wasn't really the worry, though. Worst case scenario, they'd simply have no opinion and think little on it. After all, it's not like it mattered that much, in the grand scheme of things. No, that wasn't the home that she was more concerned with being asked about.
Sunset came to a stop in her walk as she reached a familiar corner, casting her gaze down a street she'd been down many times. It was shaded, most of the street lights dead or missing entirely, and while she could see it from where she stood, there was little to truly see. It was barely a house, and it was even less so a home, but the run-down, condemned dwelling that she had been taking shelter in for months now stood there, waiting for her to take refuge in it once again.
And she did. Sunset Shimmer closed herself away in that dingy little shack with delusions of grandeur, lighting one of her many candles to do battle with the dark where the inoperable light bulbs would not, and filled her thoughts with her time with Rarity to drown out the questions of how best to keep lying to the people who wanted nothing more than to be her friend.
Sunset didn't really remember the day she'd had. After she'd shuffled into the house and slammed the door closed behind her, events of the day had left her short term memory by the time she'd finished stepping out of her shoes. By the time she made it to her bedroom, it left her long term memory as well.
All in all, probably for the best. She felt as though a lot of the time it was better that she not be able to go back and re-think through some of the things that had gone through her head throughout the day. It didn't really matter anyway; the day was done, the night was here, and she made it about as far as she usually managed to get: face-first onto her bed, which she laid across horizontally for an indeterminate amount of time, allowing the only thing to go through her head to be whatever dust had worked its way into the maroon fabric and was now graciously being filtered into her blood stream...or something.
Thinking was kind of hard. Her eyes had burned a little for most of the day, and concentration had not been her strong suit for most of it as a result. At some point her phone ended up in her hand, and the next thing she knew, she was listening to a dialing out noise ringing through the speaker at her ear.
It didn't take much thought to work out who she'd called. There could only really be one person she'd reach out at so mindlessly, and she didn't take long to answer.
“Miss Shimmer.”
Sunset smiled widely into the bedsheet, pushing herself up just a bit so she could speak without doing so into the comforter itself. “Well, well, well, look what we have here. A Rarity, minding her own business…”
“Guilty as charged, your honor…” The latter half of ‘honor’ came out distorted as Rarity broke into a yawn, not helped by the slightly more echo-y room that she sounded as though she was in. “Gracious me.”
A note of concern found Sunset’s tone as she asked, “I didn’t just like, wake you up or something, did I?”
“You may have…not to worry, though.” The faint sound of water reached the speaker, though Sunset wasn’t certain that’s what it was. “I wasn’t supposed to sleep here anyway.”
“Are you in the bath?”
Another splash, this one far clearer as what it was. “Mayhap.”
Sunset pushed herself up a bit more onto her stomach, smirking slightly as she did. “Well that’s new. Usually I’m the one who can’t wait to get out of my clothes when you’re on the line.”
Rarity guffawed in a most unladylike manner, making a small splash as she did. “Oh indeed, I simply could not contain my excitement, knowing you were going to call me at…” She muttered to herself, sounding slightly more distant as Sunset heard her turn her head this way and that while asking, “What time is it..?”
Sunset pulled her phone from her ear briefly to refer to the top of the screen, then brought it back to report, “9:42.” It was news to her as well.
”Okay good,” Rarity breathed, more than slightly relieved-sounding. “I have not been soaking for hours, then.”
“I hope not. If I’d known you were naked and waiting for me, I would have been here way sooner. Can’t keep a lady in need waiting like that.”
There was a breathy little chuckle from Rarity’s end along with the faint sound of water. ”Such a gentleman.”
“It’s what I do.” Sunset had been smiling to herself this whole time and felt the grin widening as her chin found her palm. “Gotta earn my keep somehow, y’know?”
“Only sensible…though I will confess, watching someone bathe is a curious way to earn one’s keep, darling. Are you certain that’s how we do it?”
“Could be.” Sunset’s legs idly kicked as she lay there on her belly, finger reaching for a cord her cellphone didn’t have to twirl it around her finger. “Depends.”
“On?”
“If you’d let me see you naked, firstly. Which-” Sunset raised a finger, “-for the record: would not be opposed.”
A single minxish chuckle came from Rarity’s end, though the acoustics of the bathroom made it difficult to identify that at first. “You would like that, mm?”
“Uh, yes? One of the prettiest girls in the school in the tub? We take those every time.”
“Fascinating.” Sunset could clearly envision Rarity’s face through her tone: eyes half-lidded, a coy smile on her face, head leaned back as she spoke into the phone. “Well, you’ve gotten me to half consider it, so I suppose you’ve got that going for you.”
Sunset chuckled once- not quite nervously, but something vaguely akin to it. “Well, uh…I mean yeah, I’ll take that and run with it, but I w- I didn’t exactly, uh, plan on, uh…it wasn’t on the docket tonight, let’s say.”
“Truly?” came the whimsical response. “Curious…it seems Sunset Shimmer may not know her own strength.”
“Apparently,” Sunset now properly laughed, though the slight elevation of her heartbeat didn’t ebb just yet. “Here I am accidentally almost scoring.”
Another faint sound of water. “So I take it you did not intend to seduce me tonight?”
“Didn’t make it to the first draft. Mainly just like…” Sunset paused a moment as she considered: why did she call, anyway? She didn’t think when she grabbed her phone a lot of the time, and this was no exception. “I dunno, I just wanted to hear from you.” She didn’t mean to say it, though the words happened all the same: “I like your voice.”
There was a beat of pause, and Sunset heard the smile on Rarity’s face as she replied, voice softer: “I like your voice, too. It’s always nice to hear it.”
Sunset found her legs kicking a little again as a smile found her own lips and tone to match. “I like talking to you.”
“Me too.”
Neither responded to the other for a little while after that. A familiar rosiness found the silence and filled it, sounding to Sunset’s ears how a hug felt. Her eyes closed at some point, listening to the barely audible feedback from the phone in her ear as she imagined Rarity in the same position on her end, taking in the moment like she was.
It’s not clear how much time passed. Sunset let it pass all the same, thoughts trickling in less and less as her breathing slowed.
After an indeterminate period of time, Rarity eventually spoke, though it was quiet when she did: “Pulling the plug here, darling. I’m not sure how loud it’ll be.”
Sunset nodded, like Rarity could see. After identifying the flaw with this, she responded simply with, “Ok.”
Presumably Rarity then did so. Sunset couldn’t tell - noise canceling either did its job or the tub draining was far more quiet than the warning necessitated.
The trance had been broken somewhat by this. Sunset idly considered what to say while she had Rarity on the line, though as was so often the case with Rarity in particular, she wasn’t exactly in a hurry to fill the silence.
It was interesting to her. She wasn’t exactly a stranger to lulls in conversation, but she couldn’t recall a time where lapses in dialogue felt like a feature rather than the lull it was. It was kind of nice, though conceptually she found that odd. Maybe it was a presence thing. Rarity did have a nice energy to her, and as a practitioner of magic, Sunset of all people knew the measurable importance of the energy of one’s presence.
“Protection.”
There wasn’t a response immediately, though Rarity did speak after a moment. “Pardon?”
“Protection,” Sunset repeated, confirming to herself as well as Rarity. “You feel like a protection main.” Sensing the owlish stare in the silence that followed, she clarified: “The tradition. Uh…magic. Sorry. Uh…you just- your vibes, I was just thinking about how you uh, how you felt.”
“How I felt,” Rarity repeated, audibly struggling to follow. “Right…”
“Sorry.” Sunset chuckled sheepishly, scratching at the back of her neck beneath the curtain of red and yellow hair. “Unicorn thing, I guess. Sometimes you can just sorta like- just sort of feel it on someone, you know? The uh, the magic they do. Or like, would gel with.”
“…and I feel like I’d cast protective magic?”
Sunset bit her tongue to not ‘um ackchually’ her on protection , not protective . Similar words, very different meanings in this context. “Yes. I think so, anyway.”
“I see.” A bit of the confusion drained from Rarity’s tone, though the uncertainty remained. “And you can just tell that?”
“Kind of, yeah.” Sunset shifted where she was laying, using this as an excuse to roll off her front onto her back, giving the ache forming in her spine near the base of her ribs less excuse to bother her. “Like I said, it’s just a vibe thing. I could also kinda see like…” Sunset paused, momentarily considering how Rarity felt and how that translated vibes-wise, and then continued with, “Maybe water.”
A single small note of intrigue preceded verbal response. “Water, you say?”
"Yeah. Ice, I think, specifically. Or like, earth. Both can go crystalline, and that seems like your thing." Sunset's eyes found the ceiling above her as she traced out a random design in the shadowy outline of a piece of timber sticking out from the hole that had been forming in the opposite corner of the room. "If I had to guess, I’d say you were a...Protection-Water, maybe like a tertiary Earth caster on top of that, with a crystal or crystalline aesthetic.” A moment more of consideration was given, and slightly less confidently she said, ”Mostly utility, I want to say? I could see a smattering of healing. Nothing major. Maybe like, a healing spell, you know?”
Rarity emitted a single note of idle intrigue as she considered this. “I suppose I do enjoy a supportive role…it's what I enjoy in games, at least, when I have the privilege of time to play them.”
Sunset went to speak, though she stopped herself. There was a lot she could say on this topic, and felt inclined to, now that she’d begun down it, but the knowledge that Rarity would have no idea what she’s talking about every step of the way was keenly on Sunset’s mind as she debated what she should and shouldn’t say. Much as she could ramble on the topic of magic for hours, Rarity already couldn’t keep up.
It was like Rarity could read her thoughts, with the way she apologetically filled the silence with, “I’m afraid this isn’t something I’m terribly knowledgeable on, myself. I’m not what one would call a practitioner.”
“And that’s fine,” Sunset all but blurted. A hand found her face and rubbed it as the self-consciousness hit. “Yeah, no, that’s fine, its- sorry, I shouldn’t uh-“
“Nonono,” Rarity cut in, “don’t apologize, darling, I’m- this is me apologizing for not being able to contribute to something you’re clearly interested in. I’d love to engage in this with you."
Sunset helplessly shrugged. “I mean, I don’t know how you would. They don’t exactly teach arcanology in this world. I’ve checked.”
“You have, have you?” She didn’t sound even remotely surprised - a very rhetorical question.
Sunset didn’t catch that part, due to leaping on the opportunity to start talking about magic some more. “Of course! It was one of the first things I did when I came to this world and realized I’d dropped into the courtyard of a school. First thing that crossed my mind: ‘I wonder what kind of magic humans have?’”
“That must have been dreadfully disappointing,” Rarity knowingly chuckled.
Sunset couldn’t repress the despondent sigh at the memory of her findings…or rather, the lack thereof. That wasn’t nearly as unpleasant as what she did find, once she was feeling confident enough to start expanding her search outside of her immediate surroundings. “I’m pretty sure you guys have psychics and divinists, but it’s not something that gets taken very seriously. At all. And like, with how little feedback or visual aspects those traditions have anyway, never mind how repressed everything would be in this world? Ugh...” Sunset dragged a hand down her face, thinking back on all the time she wasted chasing connections with people she could not rightfully believe had any kind of arcane talent, but who would happily tell everyone they did. “Zero regulation, zero accountability. Zero out of ten. Would not recommend.”
Rarity chuckled sympathetically. “I confess that I wasn’t much of a believer in the mystical myself, prior to…you know, the whole ‘shooting rainbows’ thing. I still find it hard to believe, at times.”
It took every ounce of willpower Sunset had not to segue off of this topic and explain the (MASSIVE) difference between mysticism and arcanology to someone who didn’t know better. She managed, but it was painful. “It’s a lot. I grew up with it and like, went to school on it and stuff, but…”
“That there are classes on it speaks volumes as to the breadth of the topic.”
Sunset nodded emphatically at this, like Rarity could see. Again. “People have spent their entire lives studying and practicing magic back home.”
There was a faint thump of a bathtub being bumped on Rarity’s end. “Yourself included, evidently.”
Sunset smiled. “Guilty as charged. Been at this since I was six, loved every second of it.”
“Gracious.” Rarity sounded as though she was moving away, though the bathroom acoustics had not changed. The phone picked up some bumping and crackled slightly as the phone was moved. “Well, if we ever find a need for some magical expertise, we certainly know who to look to for aid, now don’t we?”
Sunset shrugged as she inspected the ceiling overhead. “There’s worse places to look, I guess.” There was a brief silence following this as Sunset listened and heard no other noise from Rarity’s side for a time. “Are you still in the tub?”
“Not anymore, no.” Rarity sounded like she was across the room from the phone now. “I’m currently attending to my hair.”
“Still naked, though, right?”
The phone barely picked up a snort. Rarity sounded significantly closer as she dryly informed, ”Yes, Sunset Shimmer, I am still naked. Does this please you?”
In a completely even tone, Sunset replied, “Viscerally and emphatically.”
“Splendid.” There was a scrape of something plastic on a countertop, and Rarity sounded distant again, though no less wry. “Wouldn’t want you to be understimulated, now would we?”
Sunset pulled in her arm not currently occupied with the phone at her ear, smirking at the ceiling as she put her hand behind her head. “As a reminder: you are the one who brought up me seducing you.”
“And yet, here I am, most pointedly unseduced in spite of a very compromised position. Who have we to blame for that?”
Sunset shrugged her shoulders with a coy smile she wished Rarity could see. “I think we can agree to share the fault here.”
“Can we now.” It was stated, though phrased as a question. “A curious take. We’ve established I’m no magician, so understand that I can’t precisely seduce myself here. I dare say I’ve done my due diligence on the matter.”
“You say that, but I still haven’t seen you naked. Can’t exactly take pictures with your phone for you.”
“I mean,” Rarity said, entirely too innocently, “I wouldn’t say that…”
“Not from here I can’t.”
“Not from there, no.” A second-long beat. “It would be very doable in person, though.”
“It would be doable in person,” Sunset agreed. “Of course, I also wouldn’t need to take pictures, in that case. I could just use my eyes.”
“And hands.”
“And hands,” Sunset nodded as she agreed. “I mean, I was gonna just use my eyes, but if the offer’s there…”
“Oh, perhaps it is. Perhaps it’s not.” Sunset could clearly visualize Rarity turning her head from one side to another as she said this. “Who’s to say? Many things are possible in this world.”
“Like me getting lucky, apparently.”
“Potentially. That’s entirely contingent on how you play your cards, hm?”
Sunset hesitated for a moment, though it wasn’t enough to stop her fully. “Are you sure it’s a luck thing? Because to me it sounds kinda like you want it.”
A single note was heard from Rarity - hard to tell if it was a hum or a low chuckle. “I'm a lady of many wants, and they change all the time. Who’s to say, truly?”
“Truly.” Sunset swallowed, making note in the silence of how her pulse had elevated once again. There had been many, many occasions where a lot could get read into what she and Rarity joked about, but it had always been clear in her mind that they were simply having fun. Right now, Sunset didn’t know whether it still counted as play.
She’d be lying if she hadn’t thought about Rarity like that at least once - a lot of topics passed between them over the last month or two, several slightly less G-rated than others, and...well, it's not like she was lying about Rarity being quite attractive. There is a distinct difference, however, between idle passing thoughts and properly considering whether or not she wanted to pursue what, at least on the surface, appeared to be an opportunity being left deliberately open for her to follow up on, should she so choose. Was she reading too much into one of their usual silly games? Did Rarity not realize the signals she was putting out when she just meant to flirt like usual? Was any of this intentional? Was it real? Did she want it to be real?
More than anything, it was that last point that was giving Sunset pause. Did she want it to be real?
There was a lot to unpack here. Boy was she not prepared for it.
“Still there, Sunset?”
Sunset had a brief moment of panic, but she managed to get out an even-sounding, “Yes.”
“Good! Very good.” Rarity sounded closer to the speaker again and stayed that way. “I thought your phone had died again. It’s chosen some most inopportune moments to do so before.”
“Nope, still here…” Sunset removed the phone from her ear briefly, checking the charge in the top right corner. “Forty percent. Still good.”
Rarity emitted a pleased note at this. “Perhaps I’ll have you all to myself after all, then.”
Sunset went to speak - she wasn’t precisely sure what on, maybe just making a crack that would otherwise come naturally to her in this situation, but the context of her previous thoughts made her rethink what would otherwise seem like not that big of a deal.
Another silence came. For the first time in quite some time, it felt awkward to Sunset. Worse yet, she wasn’t sure what was better: trying to fill it, or just letting it ride out.
Mercifully, Rarity made the decision for her. “That will do,” she said, more to herself than Sunset as a drawer was heard closing. ”Fabulous as ever.”
“Oh yeah?” It felt like a mistake, but Sunset completed the thought regardless: “Can I see?”
“Certainly, darling.”
The nonchalant way Rarity responded was something of a comfort in this situation, though the genie of anxiety was already out of its bottle and in no hurry to return. That much was made fairly clear as Sunset sat there in a tense silence, unsure what she should be hoping for or if she should have even asked, gears in her head continuing to spin off their tracks while she waited.
After what felt like entirely too long a wait, Sunset felt her phone vibrate against her ear. Glancing at it, sure enough: text from Rarity. 1 attachment. Preview didn’t reveal anything but a default symbol indicating a picture was present. She tapped it immediately, saying more to herself than at Rarity, “Moment of truth.”
Sure enough, the picture was of Rarity, looking down at her phone when the photo was taken, lips slightly puckered at the viewer in a kissy face. Her hair was, indeed, well brushed and put up, though it was notably not as fabulous or intricate as Sunset had ever seen it - sensible, given it wasn’t for a formal event or party, taken from her bathroom at 10-plus PM.
Ever-so-slightly more eye-catching, however, was the angle the picture was taken from. Rarity was visible from the lower chest up, the phone low and very clearly bringing Rarity’s breasts into the center of the picture. Her arm was pressed over them, and they were visibly squished up just a bit against her chest as she posed. Nothing expressly explicit was on display, per se, but it would be a massive stretch to say that this picture was of Rarity’s hair.
Sunset took a breath, and sighed it quietly to herself as her heart hammered in her chest at the sight of a lot more skin than she’d seen on Rarity…ever.
Ok. So this was happening.
Fortunately, it was now palpably, measurably real, so she could now be a wise-ass about it. Which meant she could roll with it.
“You have very attractive…” A deliberately excessively long pause was inserted, followed by a purposefully forced-sounding, “hair.”
A small chuckle came from Rarity as she responded, “I’m glad you like them.” An equally long pause, and then the correction: “It.”
Sunset’s lips split into a wide grin. She almost laughed. “Lovely, yes. Very nice…hair.”
“Of course. I’m glad you enjoyed it. The hair.”
“Definitely, definitely. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you like this before. With the hair, that is.”
“Indeed…” A nervous chuckle came from Rarity. “I’ve um…never…done this before. So um…”
Sunset opened her mouth to continue the bit, then swerved at the last moment. “Hey Rarity?”
“Mm..?”
Putting as much sincerity as she could into her voice, Sunset told her: “You’re really hot.”
A laugh burst out of Rarity's throat in response, followed by chuckling, her voice continuing to shrink at a steady pace all the way along. By the time she replied verbally, she was uncharacteristically small and vulnerable-sounding when she said, “Thank you.” The twirling of her hair was all but audible - Sunset could clearly envision Rarity wrapping a lock of curling purple hair continually around her finger as she swayed in place. “I hope it’s not strange.”
Sunset instinctively went to assure Rarity in what was clearly a self-conscious moment, though she felt that this was worthy enough of transparency to pause and think before giving it a knee-jerk response. “I was surprised,” she admitted, carefully, “but…uh…actually kinda…kinda hoping for it, to be honest. You’re um…” Sunset’s eyes had been on Rarity’s selfie this whole time, and her eyes had not been on her hair for most of it. Or her face. “You’re making me feel some things.”
“Like..?”
Sunset didn’t respond immediately, mulling over her word choice. She rubbed her thighs together without thinking about it. “Like I wish I was there in person.”
“Mm.” That noise was the only response, for a while. After several very long seconds passed, she followed up with, “I think that would be okay.”
Sunset nodded. She was so transfixed on the sight of Rarity's selfie that she left it at that for a fair while until realizing belatedly that she’d once again given a visual cue for an audio-only conversation. Her eyes rolled into the back of her head of all but their own accord. “Maybe I really should be there. I keep nodding like you’re gonna see it.”
Rarity emitted a chime of a giggle - one of those musical little sounds that she so seldom made that always sounded so pure and joyful to Sunset. After a few moments, however, it was replaced with a despondent sigh. “I’d more seriously invite you tonight, but I can already foresee Sweetie Belle being more than a slight issue...”
…yeah, having a Crusader in the building where things of this nature were unfolding…didn’t take much imagination to see how that would go. Least of all when it’s Rarity’s sister. “It’s kinda late anyway, isn’t it? It’s like…” A brief glance at the clock represented the first time Sunset had pulled her eyes from Rarity’s selfie since she received it. “It’s going on like 11.”
“Yes.” Sunset could hear more hair-twirling in Rarity’s pause. “I don’t mind. Do you?”
Sunset gave an airy chuckle, smiling to herself as she looked at the selfie she’d been sent again. There was a lot going on here, and not a lot of time to process it. “We really doing this?”
Rarity didn’t respond immediately. After several long seconds, she admitted in a slightly smaller voice, “I’m not entirely certain what I’m doing, darling.”
Sunset’s smile faded. She sighed near-silently through her nose, then pried her eyes from the photo she'd been sent and put the phone back up against her ear as she cleared the screen with her thumb. “Maybe we should figure that out. Cuz, y’know...” She gesticulated vaguely with one hand, making abstract signs that probably would have made about as much sense to Rarity as it did now, while she couldn’t see it happening. “I can like, roll here, but…I gotta like- I gotta know what we’re going for. You know?”
“Yeah.” In spite of the agreement, Rarity did not sound certain at all.
And that, more or less, was the sole reason that Sunset was hesitating right now. She didn't know what to think, just how she felt, and nothing about what she felt gave her any strong incentive to take her foot off the pedal...that is, except for that vulnerable quality in Rarity's voice. She didn't like that. She didn’t like a scared Rarity. “All I need to know is if…you know, whatever is happening right now is what you want. I’m just along for the ride here. What about you?”
Rarity did not respond for a while. For the better part of half a minute, the only thing in Sunset’s ear was the barely audible pseudo-silence of her phone’s speaker. There weren’t any sounds from the other side indicating movement. Sunset tried to focus on it, as opposed to the heartbeat in her ribs that she could feel very clearly, like every beat was about five times as hard as it needed to be.
She said she was just along for the ride, but she was already second-guessing that. The experience that this was leaning towards had…appeal. Perhaps more than a little of it.
When Rarity spoke up, it was in a meek voice. “I’m just…doing, I think. It’s just…”
Sunset gave her a few moments, then offered, “Experimenting?”
The nod was audible in the brief pause. “Yes.”
Sunset nodded back. “Okay. And…how is it?” She gave it another few moments in case Rarity had an immediate response, and when she didn’t, Sunset followed with, “Is it fun?”
“It’s a little fun.” A pause. “It’s, um…causing a lot of mixed feelings, now that I’m…”
“Now that you’re thinking about it.”
“Yeah. I’m,” Her voice sounded ever so slightly muffled now, “kind of really embarrassed, actually.”
“It’s alright,” Sunset said, doing her best to sound as comforting and supportive as possible. The smile wouldn’t be seen, but she smiled anyway. “It’s just me, y’know?”
“I know.” Rarity was now most definitely speaking through her hands, and groaned to herself, sounding slightly further away from the phone as the noises of dread grew steadily. “Oh my god I really did that.”
“It’s alright,” Sunset repeated.
The horror in Rarity’s voice continued building in spite of the assurance. “Oh my god I sent a friend a nude over the phone. In conversation.”
“It’s alright,” Sunset repeated again, chuckling despite her best efforts not to. “I get it, Rarity, honest. It’s cool.”
Rarity was barely comprehensible behind her hands as she croaked, “Are you positively sure of that, Sunset Shimmer?”
“Beyond a shadow of a doubt.” Sunset’s voice was firm at this, then softened as she went on. “I’m honored, actually. You said you’d never done anything like this before?”
The mostly-garbled sound Rarity made sounded in the negative.
“Then yeah. I’m honored you’d…you know. I’m-” She fumbled with the words briefly. “I’m honored you’d think to do that with me, of all people, when you never had before. That’s high praise, to me.”
It was hard to make out her words with how her croaking was mixing with her hands, but Sunset could just barely make out, “I think I’m going to die.”
“Hey," Sunset threw out, "if it helps at all: not human. Remember? This doesn’t- you know. It doesn’t hit like it would someone else.”
That was a lie. That was an immense lie, in fact. This was not so far removed from what Sunset was accustomed to for her to not know how to navigate it. Even if it was, she could tell something sexual when she saw it, orthodox or not, and while this body was not her native one, it was rigged to react to these things just fine. She hadn’t uncrossed her legs for a reason.
Rarity, however, did not seem to know just how brazenly she had been lied to, and muttered past her hands on the other end of the line, “I suppose that’s a silver lining here, yes…”
“Yeah! See? There’s perks to befriending an alien invader from planet Pony.” She smiled to the ceiling, like she was trying to sell this whole thing to it, too. “It means you can try out some stuff and have it not be weird.”
The speaker crackled loudly in Sunset’s ear as Rarity exhaled into it. “Yeah.”
“Yeah! So…you know.” The chipperness bled out of Sunset’s voice as she willed herself to relax, and take a breath herself. Her heart was still beating hard, despite the effort. “Insert wise-sounding follow-up here.”
Rarity gave a derisive snort, though it was apparently enough to coax her out from behind her hands. “Profound as ever, miss Shimmer.”
Sunset flashed a grin, her other arm going behind her head as she repositioned herself on her bed slightly. “I’m a natural, what can I say?”
“Indeed.” Rarity’s tone couldn’t be drier if her mouth was full of sand. “You’d never know the clown nose wasn’t taped on.”
Sunset took in a very brief inhale, then exhaled and inhaled just as quickly, making her very best impression of a clown horn honking. Whether it was a particularly good impression or not didn’t matter, because Rarity recognized it enough to sputter, and then start to laugh.
Rarity had a nice laugh. Sunset always liked to hear her voice, but she especially liked to hear her laugh.
She had a nice body, too. A really nice body.
“So,” Sunset started, half-chuckling along with the sound of Rarity’s ebbing laughter, “so let’s just put a pin in this whole thing right now, alright?”
“Indeed, indeed…” Rarity sighed off the tail-end of her laughter. “What time is it?” Rarity must have beat Sunset to the punch on checking the time, as the response was almost immediate. “Christ.”
Sunset pulled her phone back from her ear for a peek herself. She winced slightly. “Mm.”
“We should both get to bed, darling.”
“Yeah.”
“Not entirely sure how I’m meant to sleep after this…”
“Yeah.” Sunset allowed herself to laugh, if somewhat ruefully. “Yeah…”
There was a several second pause. After this, Rarity sighed, and almost resignedly asked, “Darling, do y- if I take my phone to bed with me, do you want to keep on the line? It’s already far too late, but…”
Sunset parsed this for a second. She glanced at her phone screen again, eying the battery life - it had gone down about ten percent throughout the course of this call that had been going on a bit over an hour, going on two now. “I’m not sure how long my phone will last. Did you wanna like…what’s the- just like, talk in bed?”
“More or less, yes. Or…I don’t know.” A drawer sounded like it closed on the other end of the line. “I just really like the thought of you being there.”
“Kinda like a sleepover?”
“Kind of, yes.” Another closed drawer, and Rarity sounded much closer to the phone as she said in a hushed whisper, “Creeping through the hall, give me one minute, darling.”
Sunset nodded, like Rarity would see. She rolled her eyes at herself for it, and began the process of working her way out of her day clothes as Rarity was on her way to bed herself. This sounded like a terrible idea for the purposes of getting enough sleep to go to school tomorrow, but this also felt like one of those times where it was a price worth paying.
She still barely understood what was happening tonight, only that it had thus far been very sexually charged. She also knew it felt special, somehow, and that it demanded her full attention as a result, even if that meant going to school feeling like a zombie.
This miserly little shack of a house didn’t have heat, so as Sunset stripped down for sleep that may or may not be coming, she was quick to deposit herself beneath the worn maroon covers of her bed to avoid the late autumn night air freely filling every room while she waited for Rarity.
She didn’t know what she was waiting for, yet she waited all the same. As she did, Sunset found fatigue that had been hanging just out of sight becoming increasingly cloying outside of the edges of her senses, further muddying everything that hadn’t been particularly clear to start with today. Her eyes stung. Even when she closed them, the faint glow of her phone on the far right side of her vision felt like too much.
“Sunset?”
Sunset jumped slightly in spite of the softness of Rarity’s voice. “Yeah?”
“Can we do video?”
Sunset processed this for a brief time. She removed the phone from her head, verifying the time, and confirmed that it was even closer to midnight now than it had been a few minutes ago. “Uh…why?”
With an earnesty that all but glowed against the smallness of her hushed tone, Rarity replied, “I wanted to see you.”
There were several reasons for Sunset to say ‘no’ here. Her eyes hurt, she was tired, they both had to be up for school tomorrow, she was trying to distance herself from those particular feelings from earlier and the way they had weighed on her judgment (and continued to)…but that would also require saying ‘no,’ and that was something proving very hard to do when asked like that by this girl in particular.
The conflict was made even worse by the additional, just as soft, just as earnest, “Please?”
Sunset breathed in through her nose, then let the breath leave the same way, resignation rushing in where the air left space for it. “Okay.”
“Thank you.”
Sunset couldn’t help but smile a groggy smile. A second or so later, she glanced down at herself, suddenly conscious of her undress beneath the covers, and verified that she wasn’t about to one-up the selfie she’d received earlier the moment the feed started. A few seconds later, her phone vibrated in her hand, prompting for a video call with Rarity. Sunset looked at it for a moment, sighed silently again, and thumbed the ‘receive’ button.
The screen got brighter as the video began, though not by much. Just the slight increase in luminosity was enough to make Sunset’s face scrunch up like she’d been sprayed with water.
The sight of Rarity was there to compensate her for the discomfort, when Sunset could see her. Rarity was in bed as well, currently swaddled snugly up in her silken sheets and peering at Sunset from over the top of a plush purple pillow that she was hugging as she laid on it. It took some time, but when Sunset could more clearly see enough to make sense of it, she was rewarded by the sight of Rarity’s lips pulling upward, and with a voice dense with rosy vibes she’d come to savor, Rarity said simply, “Hey.”
Sunset’s smile was involuntary. The discomfort was already worth it. “Hey.”
What came next was something of a haze. They didn’t speak much from that point onward, but that was hardly a bad thing. What little they did say was lost to the fuzz of the sleep-starved fog Sunset would be in for the next hour or so, but what Sunset did remember doing for most of that time was exchanging long, wordless gazes with Rarity, doing nothing more than taking in the sight of her affection-filled blue eyes as a warm silence lay over both of them like a blanket.
It’s unclear what went out first: Sunset’s consciousness, or her phone. Whichever was true, the video call ended an hour and twenty eight minutes after it began, when the phone’s battery died.
There were many times in Sunset’s life where she thought to herself, “I have made a mistake.” Some of those times were when she woke up, just like she did now, and felt the vice around her skull and the sand intricately woven throughout every square millimeter of the her eye tissue, knowing deep in her heart that she likely had anywhere between two to thirty minutes before she needed to be out the door that morning.
You would think she’d eventually learn to stop being up all night during the school week. That would be conducive to general comfort and represent an overall improvement to the net-average of her life choices. Unfortunately, if Sunset Shimmer made good life choices, she would still have the flesh she was born with, would still be able to cast magic, would have a functional relationship with her goddess and surrogate mother, and probably would have inherited a kingdom by now. She’d also wake up in her own bed every morning, probably beside a loving spouse, would have a day job she halfway liked, and never would have cast so much as a stray thought in the general direction of the element of Magic.
Above all else, she might also be allowed to have nice things, and we definitely can’t have that. Especially not if your name is Sunset Shimmer.
Sunset was barely aware of her surroundings as her body all but dragged itself out of bed and did…something. A couple somethings. It was difficult to navigate around in the dark, but the light leaking in through her home’s tape-sealed windows collectively provided enough light to navigate the dust-choked spaces for her to gather up about sixty percent of her worldly belongings in the form of school necessities.
At some point in her addled haze, Sunset paused as she finished packing her toothbrush, contemplating whether she would need to bring her own shampoo today. PE didn’t happen on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and as a result the showers wouldn’t be accessible without risk of some scrutiny. She thought about what day it was for entirely too long, and just as the single functioning gear in her head dedicated to facilitating every thought process began to belch black smoke, she had the idea to check the date on her phone. This would also give her the current time, giving her an idea of how much of it she had left this morning. It was a genius plan.
Unfortunately, Sunset did not make wise choices, and her phone did not respond at all when the Home Screen button was pressed. The battery had died during the night.
It was at about this time, at long last, that it occurred to Sunset that she was having a conspicuously easy time navigating her home despite everything still being sealed up. It was late autumn by now. If she was on time for school, it would be dark. Even if she was running late, it would still be shady out. It was currently rather bright outside.
Sunset breathed in a long breath, then slowly exhaled both the air in her lungs and her reservations about violence as a low growl.
So it was going to be one of those days. Classic.
Sunset did not do much more preparation after that. Not only did she not have time for it, she was fresh out of fucks to give about it. After stomping into her shoes, she all but kicked the door open, slammed it shut behind her, and began storming down the sidewalk, her furious strides kicking up a baleful black cloud over her head that began gorging itself on the vile mood this morning had left her in.
Winter was fast on its way, and the sharp morning air reflected as much as it flensed at Sunset's lips and extremities as she marched. It didn't take long at all for her to tuck herself deeper into her jacket, pulling her chin beneath her collar, though her clenched fists remained exposed to the elements for a while longer until the volume of the pain outweighed any satisfaction it may have initially brought.
The tight weathered jeans Sunset wore were not nearly sufficient to keep out the cold, and every inch of her legs prickled with the chill wrapped around them beneath and through the fabric. One of the perks about being in a caustic kind of mood: angry marching made for a pretty good generator of heat, which took the edge off. Even still, these were the warmest pants she owned, and while the jacket was serviceable for now, it was very apparent that the few clothes she owned were not going to get her much further into the year.
Of all the things that would kill me, it would be the fact that I like skirts, wouldn’t it? Not some vigilante justice type or falling on my sword to restore my honor, just that it’s winter and I don’t own any good bucking pants.
Cold and exertion from the unregulated pace she’d been marching at had made this walk unbearable. Her legs burned, both with fatigue and exposure, and as Sunset reached a crosswalk, any spite-based motivation to push through the discomfort had made way for a budding desperation to find relief from it. She looked around at any of these surrounding buildings she might be able to take cover in, just enough to hold off the cold-
A truck in the lane closest to Sunset honked its horn suddenly, and Sunset jolted like she’d been jabbed with a cattle prod. As she whirled about to face the truck, murder in her eyes, the stream of the most vicious profanity she could spit up did not reach her lips before the window on the passenger’s side rolled down. Her eyes registered Applejack a split second before her ears did: “Need a lift?”
Sunset’s heart was still ricocheting off of the inside of her rib cage like a Ping-Pong ball, so while her brain couldn’t quite work past the adrenaline to process this entire situation, her legs had just enough feeling left to know what was good for them, and she wasn’t about to argue. She hopped forward off the curb, yanked open the filthy passenger door, and pulled herself into the cab without a second thought.
Applejack and Rarity both had loosely similar vehicle aesthetics: both families owned especially old cars, and while neither girl possessed their own, they were able to use their families’ vehicles enough to see their needs met at the expense of driving around in cars old enough to be their grandparents. A key difference between the two was that while Rarity’s vehicle looked like it was from a car restoration magazine, Applejack’s old Chevy pickup looked like it had been pulled out of a ditch that it had been left in for about 30 years, then was worked for about 30 years more while driving down every dirt and gravel road in North America. It was so caked in dirt that it was almost impossible to tell that it had a red coat of paint underneath, and said layer of dirt was probably the only thing holding the vehicle together at all. Between all the loose panels, the sheer debris buildup likely doubling the vehicle’s overall mass, and the way the engine rattled several decibels above anything else on the road, it seemed as though one good pothole would make the entire thing shatter like a tower of jenga blocks that someone had struck as hard as they could with a socket wrench.
All that being said about the vehicle, however: it had heat. The vent in the dashboard as well as the one tucked in the space where the passenger’s legs would go was belching hot air directly onto Sunset's prickling legs, and it was absolutely magnificent. Sunset sighed a heavenly sigh, sinking back into the tattered leather seat as the vehicle rumbled and began to move into the intersection. "H'ohthankthestars."
Applejack gave a single amused "Heh," looking at Sunset out the side of her vision as she navigated the vehicle into the flow of morning traffic. "Dressin' a lil' light fer this weather, aincha? I'm gettin' cold just lookin' at ya."
Sunset nodded, still completely awash in the relief of the truck's glorious heating to think of much else. "Didn't expect to be walking."
"Well, fancy that! I didn't expect you’d be walkin', either." Applejack flashed Sunset a grin. "Lucky you. Actually, thinkin' on it," only a slight pause as the rickety Chevy pickup did a slow turn into the other lane, "lucky me too! I ain't seen much of ya these days, and I been missin' you."
"You have, huh?"
Sunset must have done a worse job at covering up the sound of walls rising than she intended, because Applejack looked surprised by the doubtful tone. "Course I have, sugarcube! I ain't seen hide 'er hair 'a you fer goin' on months now. I mean heck, I wouldn't'a halfway known you was even around, if Rares wasn't lettin' us know you was still kickin'."
Sunset didn't have much to say to that. While the heat still felt great, she was far less relaxed now that it had fully registered where she was and who she was talking to. She kept her eyes forward on the road ahead of the truck, not looking Applejack's way, though she could feel the farmer's eyes on her through the side of her head.
After a few more seconds, Applejack finally asked: "Are you mad at me, sugarcube?"
"No," Sunset replied, though it was only in the second or two following this that she actually thought about the question. After a few more moments, she shook her head and repeated, "No.” She willed her shoulders to un-tense where she had begun to hunch forward slightly. “Um...sorry, I'm not, no. It's been a rough morning."
This, in turn, made Applejack relax a bit, the edges of her lips tugging up as she gave her passenger a brief once-over before looking back at the road again. "...heh, well. No offense, sugarcube, but ya look it."
Sunset's lips curled upwards, grimly smiling at her own expense as she wondered what she must look like right now. "That bad, huh?"
"If by 'that bad' ya mean about as well put-together as a set 'a Lincoln logs in a barrel fulla monkeys, then yeah,” Applejack nodded along conversationally, “'bout that bad."
That coaxed a laugh up out of Sunset, smiling despite herself. "Yyyyyep. I've been awake for about twenty minutes, and in that time I've found reason to hate everything and everyone. Not my finest hour."
"Yeesh. Well ya know what?" Applejack gave the steering wheel a thump with one hand as her tone became more cheerful. "Let's change that! Startin' with gettin' you where ya need to be right'n proper-like. Where ya headed, sugarcube?"
…right, she did have places to be. "School. I'm really late."
Silence was Sunset's answer. She could already tell something wasn't adding up, and as she looked at Applejack, she saw the farmer looking back at her, giving her an odd look with a furrowed brow. "What're ya headin' there for?"
Sunset found a growing sense of concern rising up in her, and as she thought of why this could be, she realized something: Applejack was also here at this hour. It was 11:23 AM, according to the dashboard clock, and yet here Applejack was, driving around picking her up instead of being in class that should be in session right now. Why wasn't she in school?
"You do realize it's Saturday, right?"
And with a simple combination of equally simple words, Applejack spoke the exact incantation needed to pop the cork on Sunset's soul and allow all remaining will to live to escape her body simultaneously. Her eyes slid closed, and as she turned back around in her seat, she made the very meaningful, deliberate effort to not let her hands come into contact with anything in this vehicle that they were not already touching out of consideration for the driver.
"...I'mma take that as a 'no.'"
Sunset sat very slowly back into the passenger seat, replying with entirely too much control in her voice, "No."
"Welp." There wasn't much sound in the truck for several seconds except the motor's own excessively reverberating rumbling as it ran, though after a while Applejack let out an awkward chuckle. "Wow, you wasn’t kiddin' about the rough mornin', huh?"
Sunset said absolutely nothing and did not move a muscle.
Applejack shook her head with a smile, equal parts understanding and just a pinch entertained. “Let’s uh,” she took a turn to their left, though Sunset did not see to where, “let’s getcha somethin’ in yer belly, alright?” This elicited no response. After a few seconds she followed up with, “Don’t suppose this’s one of them there rough mornin’s where ya had time to have a proper breakfast, was it?”
Sunset silently shook her head.
“Well there ya go!” A resonating thump through Sunset’s seat marked where Applejack had given the spot by her shoulder a camaraderic thump in favor of the girl herself. “Best first step ‘a turnin’ any bad day around: a nice hot meal. Works every time! We’ll have you as right as rain before ya know it. Matter ‘a fact,” the truck slowed as it prepared for another imminent turn, “I know just the place. Yer gonna love it. Neat little place, I found- heh,” the grin that just manifested was as audible as it was visible. “Alright, so back last year, I was headin’ down this way with Mac- he had the truck, see, and he’d just picked me up, cuz we was haulin’ the last pumpkins that’d come in that season. Real nice haul. We was passin’ through this street right here - and there was like fifty pumpkins in the back, mind, and they wasn’t small ones, I’m talkin’ ‘could feed a family ‘a seven ‘er eight’ levels ‘a fat ol’ thangs - and he says to me outta nowhere-“
Sunset was only half-listening. Even then, it was likely that only half of her half-listening was functioning as intended with the amount of fog still hanging thick over her thoughts. The anger did well to wake her up and to increase the forcefulness of her presence, but cloudy thoughts are still cloudy thoughts, even if they slammed into her consciousness at Mach 3 and translated into action just as fast. If you asked her to remember even just parts of what Applejack was currently saying (and just kept on saying), she’d struggle to come up with any examples.
In saying that, though, Applejack was also just nice to listen to. She had this way of having a full-on conversation with herself in how she continually prompted her own segues into different topics, each of which she seemed to have some kind of story she was ready to tell, yet in spite of completely filling the airspace with a constant stream of never-ending chatter, it was oftentimes nice to just…let her talk. Even when not paying attention to anything she said, she had a pleasant voice and always seemed to be enjoying whatever she was talking about in a way that almost made you want to listen. Failing that, if you were tuning out and didn’t have anything else to focus on, the quality of her voice was pleasant enough that it made for good background noise to zen out to. You could probably fall asleep to her voice if she was really going on and if you weren’t carefu-
Time skipped. They were no longer moving. A gentle nudge made Sunset’s eyes open, though she did not remember closing them.
The “I’m awake” that was intended wasn’t even comprehensible to her own ears, never mind Applejack…though as she blinked the sleep from her eyes and looked at who was leaning into the truck through the now open passenger door, Sunset did not see Applejack’s face.
”There you are.” Rarity’s voice was already soft, though it somehow managed to soften further as she smiled and warmly half-sung, “Hi, darling~”
“Hey.” Sunset didn’t think about returning the smile, and it came out wide and full all on its own. “What’re you doing here?”
“Well, I happened to be nearby when I was informed you’d chosen a rather peculiar spot to take a nap.” At this, Rarity gave Sunset an appraising stare and an arch of the eyebrow. “What have we learned about staying up all night, mm?”
Sunset lowered her head slightly at Rarity and quirked an eyebrow. “You know, it wouldn’t happen nearly as often if not for you.”
“That is entirely beside the point.”
Sunset smirked, about to say something more when movement caught her eye, and the farm girl smiling at them reminded Sunset that it wasn’t just the two of them right now and that maybe she should be a little more conservative than her intended response would have been. She glanced forward through the windshield as Applejack approached, briefly taking stock of where they were.
It was a very long, narrow building with a pink wall and green roof that stretched out horizontally across most of the length of the parking lot in front of it, with the entire wall mostly consisting of windows. The aesthetic had a very old-timey vibe that Sunset wasn’t overly familiar with other than in art and pictures online of advertisements for products that had come out the better part of a century ago in the human world. The most noteworthy thing about the place, in her mind, was the way the roof was designed. Atop the overhang and the rest of the roof, it appeared that the back end of a particularly massive oldie-style convertible with gold spikes for rear headlights had passed over the top of the structure and was stuck like that, wedged ass-up in the alley between the diner and the building in the lot behind it.
Sunset snorted and chuckled groggily at the sight. “What is this, bad parking jobs anonymous?”
Rarity mumbled something under her breath that Sunset didn’t quite catch (something about her mother’s parking), unlatching Sunset’s seatbelt as she leaned back around the open truck door to ask Applejack, “What’s this place called again?”
“Sweet Snacks Cafe!” Applejack called back. Applejack leaned forward to see around the door and flashes Sunset a smile. “Mornin’, sleepyhead. Er, well, it’s not so much mornin’ now, but…”
Sunset smiled apologetically and in greeting in equal measure - she instinctively pulled her phone out of her pocket to check the time, only to be greeted by a black screen that refused to light. “What time is it?”
“‘Bout half-past noon. I think you was out fer like an hour.”
Rarity shot Applejack an affronted look with a scoff to match. “You left the poor girl here for an hour, just sitting in the parking lot?”
“Well it’s not like I walked off on ‘er!” Applejack protested, looking more than a little sheepish despite it. “I mean, she obviously needed the shut-eye, so I couldn’t just shove ‘er out.”
Rarity rolled her eyes and shook her head, turning her attention from Applejack and instead helping work a bleary Sunset out from the seatbelt she was being rather slow to remove herself from. ”Honestly.”
“Oh don’t you honestly me, yer gettin’ a meal outta this.” Applejack put her hands on her hips as she scolded. “Ain’t yo momma never tell you ‘bout lookin’ a gift horse in th’ mouth?”
“Well a gift horse is nice and all, but I wish it had at least brushed its teeth first. It could do with some floss while it’s at it.”
Applejack threw her head back and moaned equally to her as the sky, “Cripe’s sake, woman.”
Sunset couldn’t help but chuckle along as she rubbed some of the lingering grogginess out of her eyes. She followed Rarity’s lead and slid out of the mud-caked pickup, taking a little extra care to not bring any of the mud along with her as she did - wouldn’t want Rarity to have a stroke. She still wasn’t entirely present yet, and she didn’t say much while Applejack and Rarity bickered, simply staying next to Rarity as they went inside.
The three of them stepped out of the late autumn afternoon of modern day and directly into a time machine currently calibrated to the 1950s. The colors were a bit more on the pastel side compared to what few scenes of such places Sunset had ever seen - lots of pinks and greens and blues intermingled with the usual reds and whites on the seats and wall décor - but beyond that, it was the spitting image of how media had portrayed a 50s diner, complete with the iconic circular seats lined up against the counter, strips of neon lights along the top of the wall where it met the ceiling, and a soda machine where the alcohol shelving in a bar would go. There was even a jukebox in the corner, and some space for dancing to it tucked aside away from the seating. It wasn’t being used currently, so it wasn’t clear if it worked or if that was just part of the décor. There were about six other people here in three of the booths, so not terribly full.
“They certainly don’t slouch on the aesthetic,” Rarity commented as the doors closed behind them. “A bit niche, in my opinion, but I can’t fault the dedication…”
“I think it’s neat!” Applejack led the way in, unzipping her jacket as she selected a booth seemingly at random to nominate as their seating spot. “Only other place I found in town that’s got one’a them there classic soda fountain thangs. Y’all shoulda seen how excited Granny Smith got about it when we hauled her in here one time. Ya woulda thought Hearth’s Warmin’d come early!”
The two friends continued chattering. Sunset remained quiet, silently sticking by Rarity as Applejack led them to the booth she’d apparently chosen. She opted to leave her jacket on as the other two shed their coats and made themselves more comfortable. Rarity slipped in the seat next to her while Applejack sat across from both of them.
While the two Rainbooms talked and bantered, Sunset’s eyes briefly touched on the few patrons here and what staff she could see, inspecting for faces she knew. None of the patrons were remotely familiar, but the employees all seemed to be concerningly close to the trio’s age group, sans the middle-aged woman behind the counter. No one seemed to recognize any of them.
Sunset swallowed and crossed her arms, sinking down a little in her seat as her eyes gravitated to the window that made up the wall to her right. Normally she preferred wall seats, but the fact that anyone on the street outside could peer in and see her seated here left Sunset feeling particularly exposed.
The sensation of a gentle weight on her arm brought Sunset’s mind back into focus. She turned her head to look and saw Rarity’s hand resting on her arm, with Rarity herself giving her a concerned look. She didn’t say the words, ‘Are you ok?’, though her face did.
Sunset smiled. She didn’t respond verbally either, giving a smaller, slightly different smile that seemed to do what she intended it to do, as Rarity gave a small smile in turn - understanding or sympathy, a little hard to read, but appeased nonetheless. The hand left her arm, and Sunset felt a little weight leave her shoulders.
It was a very brief exchange, but one that Applejack seemed very interested in, judging by how she watched the both of them. “You two really have been gettin’ along, huh?”
Sunset didn’t know what to say to this, shrugging helplessly with an awkward smile. Rarity flipped some of her hair a little over her shoulder with a dispassionate air, leaning forward to examine herself in the window past Sunset. “I’m not certain what you expected, darling. I’m positively spilling over with character.”
“Yer definitely a character, I’ll give ya that.” Applejack was spared whatever was intended to follow Rarity’s scalding look by a well-timed leaning to the side just out of the booth, waving down the waitress that was already on her way to their table. “‘Scuse me miss, you got an oversized lump ‘a bubblegum back there somewhere?”
The waitress - a girl with green-tinted skin and maroon hair who definitely could be their classmate, but who Sunset hadn’t seen before - only paused a split second before she laughed, “I’m guessing you mean Pinkie!”
Sunset’s head snapped towards Applejack with a start.
Applejack gave the waitress a finger gun and declared, ”That’s the ticket! She ain’t popped up from under our table yet, so I figured…”
“Yeah, no, sorry! She doesn’t come in until four today, I think.”
“Aw, shoot.” Applejack’s hand fell back to the table. “Rotten luck.”
“Pinkie works here?” Rarity asked, echoing Sunset’s thoughts. Her voice was calm, though it had an edge to it.
It seemed to escape Applejack’s notice, as she care-freely replied, “Yep!” She then looked over at Rarity, saw her hard expression, and frowned. “What?”
Rarity cast a quick glance at Sunset. Sunset, in turn, looked at Rarity, posture stiff and tension no doubt written all over her face. Rarity turned back around, but rather than respond to the question, she looked at the waitress and oh-so-cordially told her, “Three waters, please.” The girl’s response was cut off by Rarity snapping her head back at Applejack and crisply demanding, “A word, if you would.”
Applejack threw her arms out with a vexed sound, visibly asking what she did wrong, though Rarity didn’t acknowledge it and swiftly rose to march to the bathrooms. Applejack, left with little other recourse, stood and followed her. The waitress, no doubt confused but more than capable of reading a room, said absolutely nothing and scooted back to the kitchen.
Sunset’s chest felt like it had constricted about a half-inch inwards. She stared off in the direction that Rarity had made off with Applejack in, one hand gripping the table tightly where it had been resting when she suddenly realized she had no control over the situation.
She shouldn’t be surprised. She had known that the Rainbooms wouldn’t be willing to sit back and do nothing forever - undoubtedly they were doing things in the background, even if she couldn’t see them or tell what they were up to. Of course they’d start making moves of their own eventually. She expected it.
But what she hadn’t expected was that they would sneak up on her. That’s what this felt like: like they’d intended to creep up on her when her guard was down, and she’d almost let them. She should have known the moment Applejack ‘happened’ by her on the street. Had they planned that? How many of them were going to just ‘happen’ to drop by today? Two of five were already here, and a third one apparently worked at this restaurant. Give it five minutes and she’d be surrounded on all sides by each of them, cornered, being shook down for answers. She didn’t even have an excuse to leave that wouldn’t evoke scrutiny. No clean exit.
She shouldn’t have allowed herself to be in this situation. This was a mistake.
Sunset’s eyes found the street outside the diner window. She didn’t recognize the area outside, and her brief nap and generally sleep-deprived state coming in had denied her knowledge of which way they’d come to get here. It was entirely possible she would be out and walking for quite some time before she found an area she recognized. Canterlot was a big place, and she wasn’t dressed to be out in it.
Maybe it’s worth it.
It was in the midst of Sunset’s deliberations of escape that Rarity emerged from the bathroom. Her stride straddled the line between ‘purposeful’ and ‘brisk’ as she made her way back to the booth, then leaned forward and insulated her apparent displeasure with a softly asked, “Darling, do you want to go?”
Sunset stared at Rarity for a second or two, processing the question, then gave her a terse pair of nods.
“Alright.” Rarity reached into the booth next to Sunset and pulled her coat and purse from the seat. “Grab your things.”
Sunset barely thought, just started moving. There wasn’t anything she brought that she was not already wearing or had in her pocket, so she quickly got up from the seat and emerged from the booth as Rarity slipped her coat on. Rarity then gently took Sunset by the arm and the two strode down the aisle back to the front door, passing a somewhat confused waitress with their waters on a tray. Sunset didn’t know whether Applejack had left the bathroom or not, and she took great care throughout the entire process of leaving to not cast a glance anywhere near the back.
They left the diner, and Sunset didn’t stop moving till she reached Rarity’s station wagon, which looked weirdly normal in the parking lot of this old-fashioned restaurant. Sunset might have appreciated it more if she didn’t have her hand glued to the passenger door handle, opening it the instant Rarity unlocked the car. The feeling of the leather seat to Sunset's back brought a wave of relief, and as she slammed the door shut, she let her head fall back against the headrest and breathed out a quiet sigh.
Rarity was not quite as hasty to get in the turquoise station wagon, though she didn't keep Sunset waiting long before she was in the vehicle as well and buckled herself in with a steely kind of calm that betrayed the heat it was holding back with its forcefulness. “There are days where I could backhand that girl,” she growled just over the sound of the engine starting, “There really are.”
Sunset did not intend to say anything. Now that it was just her and Rarity, however, she swallowed the lump in her throat and asked with a stilted cordiality, “What was that about?”
It was briefly unclear who Rarity was scowling and shaking her head at - Applejack or the guy who didn’t slow down at all as Rarity tried to merge onto the main road as she pulled out of the driveway - but Sunset knew where her money was at. “I told her. I told her, do not crowd. I told her to give you some space, and then she-“ She mouthed the start of a few words, hand raising to emphasize some point she didn’t end up making, and then slapped her palm back down at the steering wheel, glowering at the road as she breathed out a fuming breath.
Sunset was silent. She watched Rarity, but otherwise didn’t move or speak. Rarity followed this example for a little while, save only for the necessary motions to continue driving, though the smoldering energy hanging over her did not ebb as time passed.
It remained like that for a while. Sunset’s attention eventually left Rarity as minutes passed, eyes finding the cityscape all around them as it streaked by at a rate that felt a half-notch above the normal speed limit.
“Nobody ever listens to me,” Rarity snapped suddenly, voice audibly rippling with heatwaves. “Maybe at the start, but then it stops. It’s like they’ll humor me at first, but then they get tired of playing along, or decide I’ve had enough attention. No one sticks to my suggestions. No one ever –“ her hand slammed against the steering wheel, “–takes me seriously.”
Sunset said nothing, and found herself quite still, both outside and inside.
“Is it because I like a little bit of flare?” Rarity waved her hand in a spiral going up as she continued, getting progressively more animated as she went. “Because I like being over the top sometimes? Does that make me silly? Am I incompetent because I do a little bit of performative nonsense to entertain myself? Is that how it is? ‘Oh, she doesn’t take anything seriously! Look at her, doing her little song and dance, she must be some kind of idiot. There’s no way she’s invested, or cares, or could possibly know what the hell she’s going on about!’” The hand she had been gesticulating with came slamming down against the steering wheel again with a hard thump. ”God forbid I keep myself sane with all this shit going on around me. They have no idea what I deal with on a daily basis. Fuck it, maybe I shouldn’t care. It’s not being appreciated anyway, and I’d probably be a lot happier if I just didn’t give a fuck. That would be nice, wouldn’t it? Just be an awful person, not care about anyone else’s feelings? How positively splendid that would be!”
Sunset barely heard herself speak up: “It wouldn’t.”
The tirade stopped as suddenly as it began, though Sunset didn’t know whether it had anything to do with what she’d said, or if Rarity had even heard her. She watched Rarity clench the wheel with a white-knuckled grip, wishing bloody murder upon the world with her eyes alone. Sunset failed to breathe until the momentum of the vehicle suddenly ebbed - Rarity realizing how fast she had been going and taking her foot off the accelerator. Sunset couldn’t see the speedometer, but she was reasonably sure that they had briefly reached freeway speeds on what was most certainly not a freeway.
There was no more talking after that. Sunset had her attention divided evenly for a while between Rarity and the road, though the road eventually won over and treated her to the never-ending procession of the sights of Canterlot as they drove straight through the city and out the other side. She had no idea where they were headed, but she also didn’t really care. No doubt Rarity didn’t, either. She may have been driving, but both of them were along for the ride at that point.
At some point during the drive, the sun had come out from behind the clouds, complimenting the car’s heater with the warmth of midday sunlight. Sunset found her mind going slightly numb from the warmth in addition to the monotonous harmony of the road’s hum and station wagon’s motor, and as the passage of time steadily lost all meaning, the post-stress crash set in. Sensing the energy already on its way out, the lack of sleep seized the opportunity to close the distance. Holding her eyes open was too difficult, so she allowed them to close.
Sunset faded in and out of consciousness at that point. She remembered very little of the drive from then on, her clearest memories being small disjointed blurbs of attempting to find a comfortable position to lean and a half-decent spot to put her head, as none of the spots she could most readily find were particularly good. She must have found out how to lean the seat back, because eventually she was most of the way horizontal where she laid.
Most of the sleep was dreamless. At some point, however, consciousness lapsed and made way for a terse, feverish series of feelings and images that Sunset would hesitate to describe as a dream, though no other words fit to describe it. She dreamed she was being beaten by something - maybe a whip, she couldn’t remember - and it didn’t really hurt, though in the dream she would grunt and cry out with each strike against her as though it did, and was distantly aware of the knowledge that it should. Her mouth felt very dry and like it was full of something, and despite her best effort, she struggled to make any kind of noise.
The transition in the dream was abrupt. She next had one of those dreams where she had a fairly clear view, or at least perceived view, of where she was. It was Rarity’s car, and she could see it, though she couldn’t look around and most of the details were wrong - a lack of doors, for instance. There was a weight against her, though it wasn’t uncomfortable. Time didn’t have much meaning in this odd in-between state of conscious and unconscious, though she could tell it was passing. She felt something against her face and lips at one point, though she wasn’t able to think about it.
Consciousness came without a transition - she simply surfaced, and saw things now. Sunset was laying back in Rarity’s car, which was both still and quiet, seat completely reclined. The sun had gone back behind the clouds outside, and the outside world was tinted a whitish-grayish tint compared to the last time she saw it. She could see trees flanking the roads from where she was laying, and for the most part all was quiet. Every once in a while there would be a faint sound of a car passing nearby.
Rarity was not in the driver’s seat. She was, in fact, in Sunset’s seat, currently laying atop her on her side. Half of Sunset’s vision was filled with purple from the top of Rarity’s head, and she felt a pressure around her waist through her jacket that must have been Rarity’s arm around her.
Sunset, having woken up seconds ago and still not feeling particularly rested, did not have the mental faculties necessary to think about this. She instead sluggishly willed her arms to move, placing them around Rarity. It was a light hug at first, though it didn’t last long, and her arms ended up just lying atop Rarity’s body where it laid atop her own.
One of the few thoughts Sunset managed to have was how odd it felt. This was the most she’d ever touched Rarity at once. She didn’t have her coat on, so Sunset could easily feel the shape of her torso and back under her shirt. It was odd. Nice, though. Stranger was the faintest scent of cigarette smoke, though that thought ended there.
Rarity shifted ever so slightly at one point. Her head moved up more towards Sunset’s face, who tucked her chin down a bit to let her face gently press into the top of Rarity’s head. The next shift of Rarity’s felt like a response to it - a gentle nestling closer.
Neither of them spoke. The one and only sound was the occasional passing car on a nearby road out of sight, which served only as intermittent background noise.
It wasn’t clear how long they laid there like that. Eventually, however, the comfort of the environment and the warmth of the midday sun pulled Sunset’s mind into the fog. Her senses blinked out as her mind was gently nudged back into dreamless, peaceful sleep.
Ever since Sunset had come into the human world, she had always thought in terms that reflected a certain warlike mentality she'd brought with her through the portal. "Tactics" and "logistics" and "assets" were phrases that regularly found their way into her vocabulary when she'd talk herself through her plans, and she had often used terms such as "territory" for defining areas of control.
The habit was cemented further by the usage of such terms by her peers, at least in part. Every clique and group in Canterlot High School had their own turf, or their own territory, even if it wasn't explicitly stated to be. The sporty kids and jocks had areas designated as theirs, as did the bandos, the techies, the preps...even the few social reject circles had spaces that they had claimed with their continuous presence there. Hangout spots, places they sat at lunch...even just specific spots on the sidewalk where they stood while waiting for the bus: everybody had at least some space in the area designated for them. Everyone had their own territory.
Sunset Shimmer, of course, was an outsider. She had no place in any of these spaces, and while perhaps she might have been tolerated in them or even been able to work her way into the good graces of any of the cliques and been granted a place, she didn't come here from Equestria to be friends, nor had she come to share. She was on the war path, and being the invader that she was, she needed a beachhead.
Easier said than done, of course. While seizing territory from others had its own special kind of appeal, it also wasn't practical. She was still one girl, and getting into an arm-wrestling match against people who outnumbered her on their own turf was a stupid idea. Snips and Snails were very useful to her, but making invasion feasible was not on the list of utilities they brought to the table.
Regardless of whatever delusions of grandeur she may have fed herself at the time, it nonetheless came down to the fact that Sunset Shimmer had to find her own place in this world, including territory to call her own at the CHS. Fortunately, she was a creative thinker, so she didn't have to look very hard to find it.
Sunset stepped up the last of the stairs in her path in this dim, cramped stairwell, and with a metallic thunk of a push bar and a pained squawk of aged steel, the heavy metal door swung open. She wasn't entirely prepared for the snap of wind that answered her arrival, and she tucked herself a little bit further into her battered leather jacket as she stepped out into the daylight onto the roof of Canterlot High School.
The tops of buildings didn't tend to get much attention from most people, and this one was no different. Whatever cleaning team principal Celestia had on staff didn't seem to concern themselves with this part of the school - bits of debris and random odd school supply-themed detritus could be found scattered about the entire roof in random places, and Sunset was fairly certain most of it had been here since she found this place years ago. Other than the outcroppings of various air conditioning and heating devices that rose head and shoulders above her and the simple concrete barrier wrapping all around the rooftop's outmost edge, there was little to see. No cover from the elements, nothing to do you didn't provide yourself, an already spartan aesthetic accented only by signs of neglect, and no amenities of any description save for the door leading back down the way you came to get here.
The sight of it managed to coax a grimace of a smile out of Sunset. This was her territory, and no one had contested it to this day, even after her fall. It was dull, it was drab, and it was uncomfortable, but it was the closest she had to a place in this world that she could truly call her own.
After a few seconds of taking in the bittersweet nostalgia, Sunset rolled one shoulder and slipped her backpack off as another stray breeze whipped by. It was a little more blustery today than she preferred, but she'd take this over being downstairs right now. Besides, she came prepared - as evidenced by the cheap flannel rag of a blanket that she unfolded and placed on the ground. It didn't make the concrete much more comfortable, but it was an improvement enough that she could probably stay here for a while if she felt like it. Plus, this blanket had just enough length to it that she could fold it over and tuck her legs into it, the cheap yet thick cotton working together with her worn skinny jeans to provide a semblance of season-appropriate insulation against the winter that drew ever nearer each day.
That inevitability was never far from Sunset's mind most days, and this one was no exception. Every step outside and every thought of comfort always came back to the cold, and while she'd been able to ignore it with relative ease to start, the imminent arrival of winter felt more dangerous than it ever had, and it was only drawing nearer.
Every year before this one, Sunset had either been indifferent or pleased that winter was coming, thoughts usually going to the holidays and the various seasonal niceties that entailed. Now, as Sunset gazed up into the gray overcast sky, wondering how much longer it would be before the first snowflakes fell, all she felt was a creeping dread and the gnawing sense that she was running out of time.
Sunset was stirred from her anxious trance by the feeling of her back pocket vibrating. She plucked her phone out with a practiced motion, eager for a distraction, and was not disappointed by what greeted her on the message preview.
Rarity
Sunset smiled. Next thing she knew, her fingers were dancing across the screen all but automatically, spelling out the first thing that came to her mind.
You
Rarity
Sunset laughed aloud to herself. It probably wasn't even that funny, yet the brief exchange and the response kept her chuckling to herself well after it had happened.
You
Rarity
You
Rarity
You
Rarity
You
Rarity
Sunset once again broke out into laughter, gently tossing herself backwards into the waist-high wall just behind her where she sat. She could all but see Rarity's face as she typed that response, and it made it so much better.
Nice and classy.
Rarity
Alas, too powerful for her own good.
You
Rarity
You
RaritySunset
It took Sunset a few seconds more to actually reply, though when she did all she managed was to text Rarity the clown face emoji, after which she resumed laughing to herself.
Response wasn't quick to arrive. Sunset continued to be amused for a while, chuckling becoming a little quieter before she went to type something else, but Rarity beat her to the punch.
Rarity
Rapid backspacing, new message...
You
Rarity
Sunset blinked, then glanced down at the shoddy flannel blanket around her legs, doing a brief assessment of the amount of material here. She hadn't considered this before.
You
Rarity
Sunset's face harbored a smile - not exactly new, since Rarity started talking to her - though it was of a slightly different shade of the one that had been dominating it up till now. She typed back simple confirmation, then huddled up a little more on herself as she tucked into her jacket in anticipation of company. Waiting was a little more difficult with the quiet excitement that snuck up on her, but she would manage.
It was essentially impossible to tell how close Rarity was from arriving, what with the steel door in the way. Even still, Sunset continued to eye it as seconds and then minutes passed, intermittently peeking her phone out of her pocket to monitor for other texts before there was a familiar thunk of a push bar and the quiet screech of door hinges, and Rarity emerged into Sunset's territory. Today Rarity was clad in a gray pea coat (one of like three coats she swapped between) and a dark purple scarf that looked far warmer than anything Sunset had on.
The moment Rarity spotted Sunset where she sat, the fashionista cast her an appraising look, eyed her up and down once, and disapprovingly informed her, "My sources seem to have failed me. I was led to believe that it would be moist up here, and yet it's not even slightly damp.”
Another laugh burst out of Sunset, and she scrambled to find a fittingly witty-sounding retort. "Well, uh...it's like, humid. That's close, right?"
Rarity tsk'd, shaking her head as she wandered closer. "Not particularly humid, either, but I'll settle for warm. How big is this-" It was then that Rarity gave the fabric around Sunset's legs and beneath her a proper look - at least, that's the best Sunset had for an explanation, because there wasn't much else she could think of that would cause Rarity to physically recoil as though she'd just spotted a snake about to lunge at her. "Sunset Shimmer what is that?!"
...somehow she hadn't expected this reaction. She probably should have. "It's-"
"ABSOLUTELY hideous!" Rarity made an appalled noise as she shivered as though someone had put an ice cube down her shirt. "You get that embarrassment of a fabric off of you right this instant!"
Sunset wasn't exactly in a hurry to do that. "Well I don't want to sit on cold concrete. And uh-" She peeled the blanket back just enough to show what pants she was wearing. "-brought it for a reason?"
"Why did you wear those?" Rarity's tone was almost pleading. "Oh good gracious Sunset, those aren't even clean!"
Sunset shrugged and avoided the topic. "Did you bring another blanket?"
"W- I-" A dejected breath, followed by reluctant whine of, "No..."
Sunset gave her a smile, eyebrows raising as she gestured to her side, wordlessly asking, 'Well?'
Rarity stared at the blanket long and hard. She visibly walked herself through at least two stages of grief before giving a long, resigned sigh. A second or two later, despair inverted and turned to grumpiness. "We had better not get seen up here like this."
"We won't. No one ever comes up here."
"And if I’m expected to have this fashion crime against humanity anywhere near me, you'd best hope that doesn't change. Now scoot over."
And Sunset did...or at least, she attempted to. As she had estimated before, it would be quite a squeeze to get the two of them side-by-side on this blanket, and as some brief eyeballing was done with a second person now physically here for her to compare, it did not take Sunset nor Rarity long to figure out that this blanket was not large enough for the two of them in that configuration. One or both of them would have a leg stuck out and no real way to remedy that.
There wasn't a chance to voice this, however, because Rarity found a solution and applied it more or less immediately: she placed herself between Sunset's legs where she sat, and scooted up very close to Sunset while tucking her legs in. This didn't exactly leave excessive amounts of fabric leftover, but the blanket could handle a little extra verticality better than it could extra width.
As Rarity settled back and pulled the blanket over the both of them, Sunset hesitated for a second or so, then yielded to impulse: she reached forward and rested her arms around Rarity's middle. When Rarity responded by settling further up against Sunset, the loose hold became a more earnest hug, which was returned by Rarity placing her arms over Sunset's just beneath the blanket, her previous distress nowhere to be seen.
It wasn't exactly what Sunset would call comfortable - the ground was still hard, the barrier to her back cold, and the wind occasionally whipping by a little unpleasant - but the sensation of touch and the weight of the girl against her may as well have been a charm with the way relaxation came over her. Every little discomfort and bother vanished from Sunset's thoughts as she let her head fall forward just enough to rest her cheek on Rarity's head. She closed her eyes, took a gentle breath in, and released it as a soft sigh.
It wasn't the first time they'd done something like this. Sunset had leaned into Rarity once or twice over the last two-ish weeks, using proximity as an excuse for the contact, and Rarity had done much the same, as well as chosen moments when Sunset was tired or dozing to hold or touch her. It wasn't new, but it was the first time that it was mutually engaged. They'd obviously been aware of it before when they'd done it, or they wouldn't have lingered like they did, but it had never been something they met together on, only a situation one had started and the other found themself in and allowed while not acknowledging it.
It also wasn't something they had swerved so hard out of their respective lanes to partake in before. Sunset had already intended to skip third period, but Rarity had been in class before this.
...Sunset wasn't in a hurry to break the cozy silence that had fallen over them. When she did speak, she did so in a soft voice, like she was trying not to wake someone: "You think Cheerilee's gonna notice you're gone?”
Just as quietly, Rarity replied, "I do not care." She settled just a bit more into Sunset, pressing her arms over hers a little harder. "I really, truly do not."
In that moment, the feeling was mutual. Sunset reciprocated the gentle tightening of her arms and let the matter slip her mind.
Time passed. It was hard to say how much, just that it wasn’t a negligible amount of it, comprised solely of cuddling and the slowly spreading warmth through the places where they touched. The only sound Sunset could hear besides her own breathing was the late autumn wind picking up in its moody gusts, the bite of which she didn’t notice so much anymore.
The longer they sat like that, the more Sunset’s thoughts gradually drifted. She opened her eyes at some point, taking advantage of the affectionate moment to get a long, close look at Rarity, even if mainly from above and to the side. She’d seen her a lot, especially lately, but it occurred to her in that moment how little she’d stopped and really looked at her. Never anyone else, either. It was essentially only Rarity she’d seen in such detail before, who she’d had a few opportunities to gaze at extensively without it being awkward. It was a little different from the video calls late at night, though - those gazes hadn’t been replicated in person yet.
Her thoughts went back to those long, barely-awake moments of intimate silence. She’d never seen someone that could kiss with their eyes like Rarity could. She’d never been kissed via eyes like that, either. It was nice.
Sunset’s thoughts were momentarily filled with those moments they’d shared, but with the added and vivid sensation of pressing her lips to Rarity’s. They were soft, almost cloud-like, and fit against hers like a dream.
Sunset licked her lips. Her heartbeat felt a little more forceful than it did moments ago.
One of the arms holding hers left its perch. As her eyes came back into focus, she watched Rarity dig into her coat pocket and pull out a lighter, of all things. She then placed it on the blanket over her lap and reached back into her coat for something else. It didn’t take much imagination to figure out what it was.
Sunset wasn’t surprised, per se - she could smell the faintest bit of smoke in Rarity’s hair, and had once or twice before this - yet she couldn’t hold back the question: “You smoke?”
The question seemed to give Rarity second thoughts, and she simply held the unlit cigarette that emerged from her pocket, balanced delicately between her index and middle fingers. After a second or so she asked, “Can you keep a secret for me?”
After a brief second, Sunset nodded, lightly rubbing her cheek against Rarity’s head in doing so. “Yeah.”
The soft “Thank you,” was felt as much as it was heard. Rarity lifted the cigarette up to her lips and placed it between them, using the hand not still occupied with their contact to click the lighter several times, trying to coax the tongue of flame onto the end of the cigarette as it thrashed about in the late autumn wind. She eventually had to use her other hand just to shield the flame so she could get the end sufficiently lit. She then sat back more comfortably into Sunset as she took a drag off it, turned her head, and released the white cloud from her lungs, which the wind did well to whip away any sign of.
It was weird for Sunset. It wasn’t as though she had objections to it inherently, but her mental image of Rarity did not include the sight of her as she was right this moment, a lit cigarette between her fingers, going for a second drag. “I never would have guessed you smoked.”
Rarity shrugged with an air of resignation, turning her head again to try to keep the smoke she breathed out away from Sunset. The wind didn’t help quite so eagerly this time, and the scent finally hit Sunset’s nose in full force. “I prefer it like that. I don’t want to have the…you know,” she gestured a little with the cigarette, ”that whole conversation. I’d never hear the end of it from my parents.”
Sunset chuckled knowingly. “Been there.”
Rarity turned her head just enough to glance up and back at Sunset. “You smoke?”
Sunset nodded. “It’s been a while, though. Little bastards don’t grow on trees.”
This spurred a snort of a laugh out of Rarity. “Quite. If my father wasn’t like a squirrel where he kept his stashes, constantly making them and then forgetting where he put them, I’d be out of luck.”
Sunset let out a quiet chuckle at this. “Nice.”
There wasn’t much mirth on Rarity’s face as she examined the trail of smoke leaking off the end of the cigarette. “At least someone appreciates it,” she muttered bitterly. “Wouldn’t need the things if not for them, but nooooo, we don’t think about those kinds of things, just how I’m not responsible and…whatever.” Rarity flicked her wrist as though to discard the matter, then took another drag off the cigarette, this one a bit more forceful than the other. The smoke came out in an irritated sigh. “I don’t care.”
The idle smile had since vanished from Sunset’s lips as she listened. With a note of concern in her voice, she asked, “Are you alright?”
It took Rarity two attempts to respond. The first time she paused just before she said something, and the other one only came after she had flippantly discarded whatever else she would have said to make room for the cigarette again. “Feeling so burnt out right now.”
That sounded about right. It still wasn’t great to hear. “You’ve seemed really stressed out lately.”
Rarity nodded, and sighed. “Sorry.”
“Don’t apologize for being stressed out. It’s not like you’re enjoying it.”
“No idea what you mean, I’m having a grand old time,” Rarity quipped, sarcasm dripping from her voice like water. “I adore having all the burden of being the head of the house while also trying to manage school, and trying to get started in business, and having a social life, and raising my sister and dealing with her all the time, because oh, she is having a grand old time as well.” Her voice became increasingly vitriolic as she went on. “It’s not like she misses her parents either, and it’s not like I resent being forced to pick up their slack because they’re out seeing the world and doing whatever the hell they want. So glad they get to enjoy their lives. It’s not like I have better things to do than juggle their responsibilities while they fuck in a hotel room in the mountains or something. It’s not like I wanted to be a family for the holidays, either, that would be positively silly. Just so silly of me. Absolute silliness, as far as the fucking eye can see. It’s wonderful.”
Sunset did not know what to say to that. She felt the need to say something in response, though, and she hated that the only thing she could think of to fill the oppressive silence that followed was, “I’m sorry.”
Rarity shook her head, pausing to take another drag, then breathe out a cloud of smoke as she cast a weary gaze over the rooftop at nothing. “It’s not your fault, darling.”
“No, but…”
…there wasn’t follow-up. The thought ended there.
Silence reigned after that. Sunset wanted there to be something she could do here, or something she could say to make this better somehow, but no amount of grasping gave her any such inspiration. “I wish I could help.”
It didn’t take long for Rarity to respond, “I can think of at least one way you could.”
“Shoot.”
Rarity sat back, pressingly lightly into Sunset. “You could not let go.”
Sunset’s arms wrapped around Rarity’s middle a bit tighter, and she was squeezed back in turn. “I got you.”
They didn’t talk much after that. There was still a little heaviness in the air after what had been shared, but the cuddling did well to lighten things as time passed. At some point or another Sunset found the cigarette being lifted at her in offering, and after a moment of realizing what was being offered, she accepted it, gently removing it from Rarity’s fingers to take a drag of her own. She held the smoke in her lungs for a bit, savoring it, then breathed the white cloud out, passing it back to Rarity as she enjoyed the tingle of nicotine she hadn’t felt in months.
Skipping class to cuddle and smoke on the roof…what a couple of delinquents we are.
…she decided not to say that aloud.
There was a phenomenon that Sunset liked to dub "insomnia o'clock." The exact time that this mythical hour struck tended to vary by night, but tonight it was about midnight, and with it came all the implications that the name entailed.
Sunset stared up at the ceiling of her shitty little home's shitty little bedroom, laying sideways across her mattress with her legs hanging off the edge. As she laid there unmoving, her eyes traced the innumerable mini-patterns in the crackled and chipping caulk of the slowly disintegrating ceiling over her head. The shadows obscured most of them, and to her the exact layout of the designs shifted and wobbled subtly as her eyes attempted to see into darkness they simply could not see into, allowing her imagination to fill in the blanks with markedly poor consistency. It was a doomed game, yet play she did, because while it was impossible to win, it was a low-energy, monotonous activity to partake in while she waited for sleep to find her. It usually worked eventually.
The issue, of course, was that the hour hand on the broken clock in the corner had struck insomnia o'clock some time ago. No matter how many laps her eyes did around the room, nothing seemed to bring her mind any closer to stillness. The quiet frustration that came with knowing of the futility of her situation was not helping with the lack of rest, and as it grew, it only served to agitate the tension hanging over the center of her chest like a fist loosely gripping her rib cage - no doubt a contributing factor to why insomnia o'clock had come in the first place.
It was going to be a long night, it seemed. On the bright side, she had a few options available to her on how to make the night pass easier...assuming they worked.
Sunset reached into her jean pocket and retrieved her phone, bringing it to her face in a practiced motion. Naturally her fingers guided her to her texts, where she found a very familiar name, gave it a tap, and asked the ever-important question.
You
There was little else to do after that but do some more waiting. Mercifully enough, she wouldn't be waiting for long.
Rarity
A little hope came to life in Sunset's smile.
You
Rarity
You
Rarity
You
Rarity
Sunset cracked a small grin at this. Rarity replied before she’d begun typing a response.
Rarity
Took the words right out of her mouth.
You
Rarity
You
Rarity
Sunset broke into a wide smile at this. After only a moment more of reading that text over, she thumbed the Home Screen button, quickly found her contacts, and tapped on the picture of Rarity’s smiling face beside her name.
She got only a single note from the dialing out sound before Rarity picked up, sing-songing fondly, “Hi darling~”
“Hey hey.” The welcome had Sunset smiling just as fondly. “Fancy meeting you here.”
“I know, right? It’s really quite something. You come here often?”
Sunset shrugged coyly like Rarity could see. “Once or twice. There’s this bombshell of a girl that comes around here every once in a while, and gonna be real? Can’t resist the chance to catch a glimpse again.”
“Oh my.” There was a faint creak of a mattress, and Sunset could clearly envision Rarity laying on her front with a playful grin, chin in hand. “You sound positively smitten, miss Shimmer.”
“Hey, I’m a simple mare. I see beauty, I want beauty.”
A minxish little giggle chimed from Rarity’s end. “A girl who knows what she wants, mm?”
“Something like that.” Sunset’s legs gently swung where they hung off the edge of the bed. “How about you? Bet you want plenty.”
Rarity hummed quietly. “Maybe one or two things…”
“Like?”
“Oh, I don’t know…” A second or two of deliberate pause preceded the response of, “You.”
Sunset smiled a little wider. “Well, you got me. Lucky you, huh?”
“Lucky me indeed.” Then, speaking through clenched teeth, she added, “Don’t even have an audience this time.”
Sunset chuckled. They’d barely even been at this, and already she felt significantly more relaxed than when the conversation had begun. “Any idea what started that whole thing?”
”God knows,” Rarity breathed through an exasperated sigh. “I’ve given up trying to figure out what goes through my sister’s head when she and her friends pull their stunts. All I know is there’s no baby monitors in my room now, all the curtains are down, and I just got confirmation from Applejack not that long ago that those little miscreants are all accounted for.”
“So we’re definitely clear.”
“Definitely.” A beat. “Probably.” Sunset heard a faint creak as Rarity briefly sounded more a few feet further away. “At least I’m pretty sure…my room’s clean, at least.”
It was times like these that Sunset was glad she was an only child. “Let’s keep the adventure in the bedroom, then.”
Rarity let out a devious little laugh alongside another stray squeak of a mattress. “An adventure in the bedroom, you say?”
Sunset paused for a brief moment, then let out a sheepish chuckle. “…okay, that one wasn’t on purpose.”
“Sunseeeeet,” Rarity whined. “Don’t get a girl all excited like that!”
“You’re already excited, let’s be real.”
“N- well-“ A little sigh. “Alright, perhaps a pinch. Perhaps a pinch of preemptive excitement.”
Sunset both physically with one hand and verbally finger-quoted as she said, “‘Excitement.’”
The response wasn’t immediate. After a second or two of silence, Rarity peeped, “Is it that obvious?”
“Little bit.” In response to Rarity sounding smaller, Sunset did her best to project extra assurance into her tone to compensate. “Not complaining, mind, it’s just, y’know…just an observation.”
In lieu of words, there was a long, muffled sigh that sounded as though it had been released into a pillow rather than at her phone’s speaker.
“I don’t mind! Honest.” Sunset chuckled gently in spite of herself. “You know me.”
Rarity was barely comprehensible through the pillow she spoke through - it’d be impossible to know the words if they didn’t match the rhythm of ‘It’s embarrassing’ as well as they did.
“I don’t think it’s embarrassing.” Sunset took a second to reposition where she lay, rolling onto her front and leaning up on one arm as she spoke. “It’s not like it’s some big deal or anything. What, you think I haven’t gotten horny before? Cuz I’m not exactly a beacon of purity over here.”
This time the response was completely incomprehensible.
“Didn’t catch that.”
A beat of silence, then a far clearer response as Rarity quit gargling a pillow: “It’s just weird to me. I’m…I-I don’t know, it’s just…”
Sunset smiled a grimace of a smile. “I uh, I probably shouldn’t have like, called you out on it.”
”Nono, it’s just-“ It took Rarity several seconds to put her thoughts together well enough to put them into words. “I’m not used to it. It’s um…”
“New?”
“Yes- well.” A second of silence. “Yes? But also um…well that, and also, um…”
More searching for words. Sunset waited patiently, shifting position again to lay on her side, as she could already feel the tension building in her back from leaning up like this. She then ended up on her back again because that was just easier to do.
Rarity settled on something eventually: “I suppose I’ve never really had the option to address it before. I’m not really sure how to…”
Sunset gave her a few more seconds. When nothing came, she asked, “Does it make you uncomfortable?”
A few moments of consideration passed quietly. “Well…kind of. But not…not like that, I mean. Not with- not with you.”
Sunset cracked a small smile at that. “Just kinda weird, huh?”
“Yeah.” Rarity briefly paused. ”Do you think it’s weird?”
Sunset gave the matter a second or two of consideration, but found the answer not much different than before. “Not really. I mean, I haven’t talked about it at length a ton myself, cuz, yunno,” she chuckled a little. She was quietly pleased that Rarity giggled along with her. “But it’s whatever.”
“Does it make it stranger that it’s with a human?”
That gave Sunset pause. She looked up at the ceiling above her thoughtfully, finding one spot in particular to level a longer than average stare at as she mulled this over. “Not,” she began, and then trailed off, mulling it over further before she found her voice again. “Not really? Cuz I mean…yeah I won’t lie, there’s some weird stuff that comes with uh…this topic in particular for me in particular? But that’s like, cuz I’ve transferred species and that’s kinda bucked no matter which way you look at it. In general…no, not really, I don’t think. Sexual stuff is just kinda sexual stuff when you get down to it.”
Rarity let out a small note of a sigh, then replied in a tone that almost sounded wistful: “It must be nice to be so confident.”
Sunset found herself shrugging helplessly, briefly fumbling for a response to this. “I…guess? Idunno, it’s just…it’s just a thing, I don’t see the point in making a big deal out of it if you don’t gotta. Cuz we can just talk about it, right? Like…it’s just us.”
There wasn’t a response to this. Silence fell where the conversation lapsed, slightly more awkward than Sunset was accustomed to.
Sunset listened to the silence for a little while. At some point she began to wonder if perhaps it would be better to talk about something else, though she wasn’t sure what to talk about at that exact moment. She lifted her phone from her ear, stealing a glance at the screen briefly to see the time. 1:19 AM.
Rookie numbers.
As Sunset went to remark on this aloud, Rarity beat her to the punch. “Darling, would you find it at all odd if I asked you something?”
Sunset shook her head, like Rarity could see. “Not at all.”
In a smaller voice, Rarity added, “It’s a mite personal.”
And again, Sunset shook her head with a shrug. “No harm in asking. Whatcha wanna know?”
The delay was brief. “Have you ever been attracted to a human?”
Sunset couldn’t help but smile to herself. Gonna be one of those nights, huh? After a moment more, she decided she was fine with that. “In what manner?”
“You know.”
“Sexually?”
A brief hesitation. “Any, but…that too, yes.”
“Yeah, I have. Fairly frequently, I’d say.” A beat. “I mean like, sexually. But yes, in general I’ve felt attraction. It’s uh…it’s a little bit weird? Cuz you know- humans? Human faces? Bodies? Like- like I don’t need to tell you humans and ponies are built a little different from each other, right?”
“I assumed so,” Rarity giggled.
”Yeah, kinda different. Apples and oranges. So I don’t always like, know why I find things attractive like that, but uh,” she tilted her head as though to lean slightly closer to Rarity, “the body works? Yeah. Yeah uh, all the parts in this thing work just fine, and it knows what hot is for humans.”
“So if you saw someone naked, you’d…react.”
“Yyyyyup.” Sunset hesitated to say what she thought of next, but proceeded anyway. “I can confirm that much just with you alone.”
Rarity sputtered slightly, then began to laugh. “Oh, y- oh dear. So you did like that picture.”
“I uh…” She chuckled, sheepishly scratching the back of her neck. “I wasn’t kidding. Felt a thing or two.”
“So you…liked it.”
“Kind of a turn-on, yeah.”
Rarity squealed at this and once again broke into laughter - a giddy kind of laughter that betrayed a certain nervousness beneath the mirth rolling freely from her. Even so, it didn’t sound like she was uncomfortable, so Sunset just put her arm behind her head, swayed her legs, and smiled to herself as she listened to the lovely sound that was Rarity’s laughter.
After a little more of that, Rarity let out an airy, cheerful sigh. “There are so many reasons I’m glad I’m alone in the house right now.”
“No idea what you mean,” Sunset quipped, legs gently swaying off the edge of her bed. “Just a perfectly family-friendly conversation going on at–“ A brief glance at the phone, “–one thirty in the morning. PG at best.”
“I feel like the ratings department would have some words of disagreement, darling.”
“Yeah well, maybe they should rate deez nutz.”
An ugly, most-unladylike snort burst through the speaker from Rarity, followed by a slightly more distant, “For God’s sake.”
“I can assure you that God has nothing to do with what’s transpiring here tonight.”
“Stooooooop.” Rarity had begun to laugh again. “You’re so bad.”
"It’s what I do~ Comes with the territory.”
“I could have sworn your name was Sunset Shimmer, not Sunset Shameless.”
“Now see, that," she flicked a finger as though tapping it against the matter, "you can blame the marketing department for. They had absolutely no faith in my vision.”
“And what vision, pray tell, would that be?”
It was practically free. “A vision of deez nutz.”
“StOP!” Rarity half-shrieked, and began to laugh again. ”Sunset!”
Sunset now joined in with the laughter this time, cackling to herself in the darkness.
If not for her obvious cheer, Rarity would sound positively petulant as she grumped, “You’re lucky you’re hot. You wouldn’t get away with half of this if you weren’t.”
“Sexy bitch privileges! Gotta love ‘em.” Sunset glanced to her left toward her pillow, and decided to go with her impulse at the sight of her bed, both for the bit and because she wanted to anyway. “And on that note, I’m taking my clothes off.”
Sunset didn’t hear precisely what was said in response as she moved the phone from her ear, though it had a distinct “are you kidding me” energy to it. She pulled her shirt up over her head and flicked it aside before she brought the phone back up and heard the latter half of what was being said. “-and now I know you’re trying to torment me. You can’t just have the conversation we’ve had and then hit me with that!”
“The important part is if it’s working.” She reached back and unclipped her bra with one hand. She then faux-hastily corrected herself in a deliberately unconvincing tone, “I mean I would never do that. That would be mean and unfair?”
“And slightly hot.”
“And slightly hot.” Jeans: unbuttoned. “We don’t do that here.”
“Truly not.” A beat. “You’re not actually undressing, are you?”
“I said I was,” Sunset replied, in a ‘what did you expect?’ tone.
“Why now??”
“Cuz I wanted to!” Sunset shrugged helplessly with her one hand, momentarily pausing her wiggling out of her pants to do so. Damn tight jeans were difficult to remove one-handed. “I wanted to be comfy. That, and it was funny.”
“Ah yes, the funniest of all practical jokes,” Rarity deadpanned. “Stripping to nothing when you know your friend is already wrestling with her share of friskiness.”
“Absolutely. Also gimme a sec cuz it’s cold in my room and my pants are stuck.”
Rarity gave only an exasperated ‘ugh’ in response.
Sunset put the phone down, smirking, and proceeded to un-stuck her jeans where they’d caught around her thighs and, after another moment’s consideration, called it good at that. She collected the phone again, pulled back the faded covers, and quickly put them over herself to shield her from the brisk air of her unheated room. “Aaaand done.”
“Great, thank you,” Rarity monotoned dryly. “Your contribution is greatly appreciated.”
“Here to help!” Sunset beamed at the ceiling as she pulled her covers over herself tightly while tucking into a ball beneath them. “Now we can skip over my half of the ‘So what are you wearing?’ exchange.”
“Making plans, are we?”
An innocent shrug. “Just being prepared. You never know.”
“Mhm…” Sunset could envision Rarity with her eyes half-lidded by tone alone. “Sounds dangerously close to trying to tempt a girl, to me.”
Sunset smirked. She went to make a joke, then admitted, “I’d be lying if I said my intentions were entirely pure here.”
“Mhm,” came the knowing chuckle. The confidence in her tone wavered a little as Rarity then went on. “Then I guess it’s only fair that I confess that I’m a little tempted.”
“Nothing wrong with that.” She’d been keeping them on for practical purposes, but Sunset decided to shed her underwear beneath the covers without making note of it. “It’s kinda funny, though. I’m not used to…” She paused. “Well, frankly the idea of stripping down for someone is kinda weird in the first place, but that’s just cuz like, I didn't really do clothing back home.”
“Or now, apparently.”
“Or now!” Sunset chuckled. “I don’t do this often, is the point.”
“Believe it or not, this is somewhat foreign territory for me as well. It’s a rare day when someone’s so eager to undress for my benefit.”
Sunset tisk’d. She hugged her knees under the covers with her one arm. “Sounds like you’re missing out.”
“Quite…”
"Maybe we should do this more often."
The eye roll from Rarity was audible. "Oh please, I can already barely keep you in your clothes, never mind now that you're weaponizing it against me, absolute scoundrel that you are."
Sunset shrugged beneath her covers in a 'whattya gonna do?' manner. "I'll get dressed if you tell me to. Just say the word."
From Rarity's end came a long, thoughtful noise. It ended with a disdainful little click of her tongue. "You know what, actually? I'm going to call your bluff."
Sunset raised an eyebrow. "My bluff, huh?"
"Indeed. I think you may be misleading me, miss Shimmer."
"Do you now?"
"Quite." There was a small challenge in Rarity's voice. "I think that you are not in fact undressed. A cruel game, truly, playing with my heart like this, but that is my belief."
"Heh." It wasn't exactly difficult to see where this was going. "So what I'm hearing is you want some proof."
"Oh," Rarity audibly began to inspect her fingernails with a disinterested air, "I wouldn't say that, though if you absolutely insist on defending your claim, I suppose I can't stop very well stop you..."
And there was the request. Disguised as a challenge, but a request it was.
Sunset paused. She tapped her index finger slowly on the case of her touch phone, appraising the task in her mind.
She had taunted Rarity with it, so there was an argument to be had for putting her money where her mouth was. Furthermore, and perhaps most pointedly, Rarity had sent her a picture of similar nature a little while ago, and she had never thought to reciprocate - something which had periodically found its way into her thoughts as something akin to a regret about the whole exchange. It was only fair, right? It's not like Equestrians had much of a concept of nudity to hold her back.
They didn't need one, though, because this was a different beast from anything back home, with different implications and baggage to boot. This was a smaller task for her than it would be for most humans, but she was not blind to the implications, which were enough to make her hesitate.
"...you don't have to," Rarity reminded in an uncharacteristically small voice.
"I know." Sunset made her mind up at that moment. "One sec."
The phone left Sunset's ear, and she thumbed the home button, swiping over to the camera. Naturally it was pitch black, so she had to get the flashlight on…which nearly blinded her, making her squint harshly at the sudden stab of light. "How do you work this stupid thing," she muttered to herself, twisting the device about this way and that as she tried to work out the logistics of a selfie - something she had not done in many moons, and had not done particularly often during that time.
She managed, eventually. Once she'd worked it out, she peeled back the faded maroon comforter as she stretched out across her mattress, exposing her bare skin to the cold room's air that immediately made her shiver and goosebumps start to work their way up her arms and legs. At least it'd be brief.
Sunset did not really know what to do with herself for the picture. She deliberated for a few seconds, looking down at herself as she weighed her options, and opted to go for something simple: one leg over the other slightly, more so to preserve heat than anything, with her arm snaking down her torso ending with her hand cupped between her legs. One breast was covered by her arm, though the other was not. She flashed the camera lens a smile she hoped was less awkward than it felt, and took the selfie.
...off-center. Whatever.
Into the texts it went, and sent to Rarity. She then brought the phone back up to her ear as she swiftly pulled the covers back over herself. "Special delivery."
"You actually did it?"
In contrast to Rarity's incredulity, Sunset sounded quite casual. "Yeah, why not? You sent me one earlier. Fair's fair."
Rarity giggled timidly in response. "I guess that's true..."
As Sunset curled back into a ball beneath the covers, she had a small smile on her face. The anticipation of the message's arrival was not just Rarity's.
It was not hard to tell when Rarity opened the photo, because she let out a noise like someone had placed a cold hand on her bare back and she was trying to suppress it. "Oh gracious me."
Sunset's smile bloomed into a wide grin. "Like it?"
"You're gorgeous, you know that?"
Somehow Sunset smiled wider. She curled up on herself a little more as a tickle of giddiness rippled through her. "Thanks."
It was quiet for a while after this. Sunset felt a little wiggly as she huddled up under the sheets, a big smile plastered on her face as she basked in what she perceived as admiration beaming in from Rarity's side of the line. She felt very pretty all of a sudden - something she hadn't felt in quite a while - and it was...nice. It was very nice. It felt good to be admired. Felt good to be pretty.
Rarity piped up eventually. "Sunset, I have a confession."
"Mmyes?"
"This is making me wonder if I like girls again."
A laugh burst out of Sunset's throat like the cork of a thoroughly shaken champagne bottle. She smacked her free hand over her mouth in response, halfway startled by its suddenness, and she was powerless to stop the girly stream of giggles that poured out of her. The most she could do was muffle them, but stop them? Noooooo.
When she had the ability to speak again, Sunset had to force past the giggling to finally proclaim, "Corrupted another one!"
"It's not fair," Rarity whined. "Darling it's not fair, why do you look like that? Why do- oh Christ this is-" Rarity’s growing horror sounded muffled, like she was speaking through her hands, "oh it's the sleepover all over again."
Interest piqued. Sunset propped herself up a bit on one arm, chin in her hand, and declared, "That sounds like a story."
Rarity didn’t respond immediately, though when she did, it came out all in one go, with one breath. “So- ok so a long while back, we had a sleepover and Pinkie misplaced her pajama pants, so she had a pair of tights on that night instead- I don’t know, I don’t know if it was the tights, or- or how loose it made her shirt look by comparison? It really made it look like- like, there was overhang, and then waist down it’s almost skin-tight, like- god that whole thing, oh it was-”
"Hot."
"It was!" Rarity cried, sounding distraught. “God, and she’d sit like- she’d do that thing where her- legs spread, feet flat together? The fabric was so tight.”
"Very hot."
”It was!” This came out equal parts shriek as whisper, and Rarity let out a drawn-out groan that echoed into her hands. “Ooooughhh and it was late, and there were others in the room and oh god it was so hard to manage. You could see everything every time she sat and I wanted to do positively unholy things. It was torture.”
Sunset couldn’t help but laugh, equal parts at the mental image and the energy Rarity was putting out. The giddiness from before had most definitely greased the wheels of the laughter engine as well. "Too bi for your own good!"
"I'm not even bi!" Rarity wailed, despair in her voice. "At le- at least I don't think I am! Am I??"
"You sound extremely bi right now, won't lie."
"But I don't like- th- that many girls! This barely happens! It's basically just you and Pinkie..."
"Aaaaand we are girls," Sunset casually drawled. "Soooooo if you do the math, you'll find that thaaaaat's a little gay for a straight girl. Soooo, y'know...bi!"
"I'm so confused." Rarity's voice once again became muffled and echo-y from behind her hands. "It's not fair."
Sunset let out a single taunting laugh as she pointed across her bed where she imagined Rarity to be while speaking to her. "Bi."
"Shut up! This is your fault!"
"Nah nah nah," Sunset refuted through the next bout of laughter, pointing at the space where she had assigned Rarity's imagined presence, "it's your fault. You doubted my power level here, you've got no one to blame but yourself."
"Curse you," Rarity whimpered, sounding like she'd curled up into a ball. "Curse you and your stupid sexy body..."
It was at that moment that Sunset knew precisely what act of evil she was meant to perform that night.
About thirty seconds passed. As far as the call was concerned, both sides of the conversation were quiet, though eventually Sunset spoke up with deviousness thick in her voice. "Hey, Rarity. Check your texts."
"My what?" There was a slight delay, and the exact moment that she found her texts was marked with a hard, "No."
Sunset burst freely into laughter as she threw her covers back over her bare skin. "What, what's the matter? Something wrong?"
"No."
"Check your texts! What did it say?"
"Sunset Shimmer, I'm going to smother you in your sleep."
"What's the matter?" Sunset could not stop laughing. "What's wrong, Rarity? Need another one?"
"Like a hole in the head, damn your eyes!"
"C'mon, need another one?" Sunset threw her comforter off herself again. It was worth the cold. "C'mon, I'll take a quick one, it'll be great-"
"CEASE!"
"Just one more!" Sunset wasn't even sure she had taken a picture of herself so much as she had the mattress next to her with how unsteady her arm was, and she fumbled with her phone to try to send the resulting photograph to Rarity as fast as possible. "Just one more, for old time's sake, c'mon, it's on me!"
"I'm going to bury your stupidly pretty body, Sunset Shimmer!"
"Hang on, redo, that one didn't get my good side, I got this-"
"StOP!"
Sunset, in fact, did not stop. She sent a total of seven more nude pictures herself of varyingly atrocious quality until Rarity hung up on her, at which point Sunset nearly died laughing. The two would then remain in conversation through text for the next three hours until Sunset's phone ran out of charge.
When Sunset finally went to sleep that night, she felt prettier than she had in years.
For as often as Sunset found herself staying up late, what she normally tried to do was come to school fairly early. It hadn’t worked out so much the last few weeks, but she still semi-routinely got her wish. Sometimes she didn’t even feel like the walking dead.
It was a simple enough routine: every day she’d come to school well in advance of any students; about 5:30 AM was her preferred point of entry, seeing as the school was usually open that early yet almost entirely empty. She’d start by going to the library, using one of the thoroughly buried electrical sockets in the corner as a discreet place to charge her phone. While that was charging, assuming it wasn’t a Tuesday or a Thursday, she’d go to the girls’ locker room to brush her teeth. Then she’d retrieve the soaps out of the showers there and abscond quietly to the boys’ locker room - she preferred those showers because the boys’ locker room had better water pressure, yet she preferred the girls’ soap because the boys' scented soaps made her want to gag. Then she just had to put everything back where it belonged, get some food, and return to the library for her phone and wait for class to start, all while dodging any signs of life wherever possible.
It was a simple routine, but a reliable one. School meant several inconveniences, but it was also access to electricity and running water she had more or less unrestricted use of, provided she could hop through the hoops necessary to utilize them.
It was a Monday morning, and that meant that showering was on the table. Having thoroughly drained the hot water tank for the gymnasium because walking to school in this weather sucked, Sunset left the locker room hallway, which was barren as usual for this time of day. She'd taken a bit longer than she normally did to shower, so it proved necessary to use the lesser-traveled back route to the library to avoid the handful of students that were drifting about. She would have liked some food, but she’d taken too long and would have to show her face to the early morning kids in the cafeteria while there wasn’t a crowd to hide her head in, which just wasn’t acceptable. She’d live without.
Upon entering the library, Sunset did a quick glance about the wide room. Not seeing Cheerilee and confident she’d be unnoticed, Sunset slipped over to the room’s light switches and flicked off the light for the right end-most part of the room, which she then made her way over to. Ducking into the farthest aisle of the book shelves, she pulled her phone out from between the books she had tucked it in, leaving it on its charger. She then put her back to the shelf, sat down, and let her head fall back against the spines of the books behind her as she let out a quiet sigh in the relative gloom.
This was usually how she spent the next hour or two. The exact means by which she occupied herself varied, but a lot of times she’d just lay down on the carpeted floor and let the minutes pass in peace as her hair dried. Maybe she’d catch a nap while she was at it.
It was unfortunate that Rarity was never here nearly as early as she was. An extra hour or two alone with Rarity every day would be fantastic, but alas, she was on her own here. She still needed to find a way to convince her to agree to that...didn't help her now, though.
While Sunset was debating what precisely to do with herself, the phone in her lap vibrated twice. Glancing at it, Sunset smiled and brought it up to examine the text, though the smile became a befuddled frown as she looked at the sender and did not see Rarity’s name like she was expecting. Instead, she saw a number she did not recognize with a blank default icon. Not a contact.
“Who the buck?” she muttered under her breath, though that answer provided itself in short order as she read the text she’d been sent.
(###)###-####
Sunset’s already confused expression contorted further. Fluttershy was texting her? Of all people, it was Fluttershy?
It took Sunset an inordinately long time to answer such a simple question. Her guard was up.
You
(###)###-####
She didn't pause to think on it - the response was mostly automatic.
You
(###)###-####
You
(###)###-####
Sunset stared at that message. She wasn’t thinking much while she simply looked at it, yet it also felt like her thoughts had been given a good stir.
Her thumbs started moving again to type her response.
You
(###)###-####
Sunset waited. She scrolled up the brief distance again to the line she’d been looking at before. Then she scrolled down to the end of the very short conversation, which did not seem to be lengthening any time soon.
Sunset fidgeted in place. Her fingers started moving again, acting on a thought that came to her.
You
(###)###-####
Sunset blinked a few times.
You
(###)###-####
You
(###)###-####
Sunset scrolled up at that, and found that she couldn’t either. Conversations in text didn’t appear any farther back than when the first text arrived a few minutes ago.
You
(###)###-####
Sunset dipped into her contacts, though midway there she remembered that she wouldn’t have it saved. Sure enough, her contact book was markedly bare, save only for a select few names - Rarity being one of them, as well as Flash Sentry and a few others that were only recorded as numbers without names. Utilitarian purposes, for the most part, though the majority weren’t used anymore. She didn’t do much with herself anymore.
You
(###)###-####
You
Fluttershy not being on her list of contacts was far from surprising, though Sunset also was also somewhat bothered by it…not that she really wanted to remember what was said between the two of them in the past. Nothing to be proud of, no doubt.
A brief internal debate was had, once Sunset had come back into focus, and brief was all it had to be. Quite simply, there was no way this was random, and Sunset had difficulty accepting that this was as innocent as it appeared. Her next question to Fluttershy came not long after she came to this conclusion.
You
(###)###-####
You
(###)###-####
You
(###)###-####
You
(###)###-####
You
(###)###-####
The feeling that the last line inspired made Sunset’s face twist into a grimace. She had been about to tab out of the conversation, but she instead swerved and returned to typing.
You
(###)###-####
You
(###)###-####
Sunset couldn’t help but roll her eyes lightly.
You
(###)###-####
You
(###)###-####
You
(###)###-####
Sunset smiled a little as her thoughts touched on Rarity, though the distraction was brief. She went to reply, but then saw Fluttershy was in the midst of writing something, so she waited.
(###)###-####
You
(###)###-####
You
(###)###-####
Sunset...did not know how to respond to that. Her thumbs twitched instinctively to start typing, but all she ended up doing was staring at that message and frowning. Her brow furrowed after a little while.
After some time, Fluttershy texted back:
(###)###-####
Sunset felt the impulse to begin typing out the words, 'Are you okay?' She almost did.
You
(###)###-####
Sunset hesitated. She wasn’t exactly eager for that, but she also wasn’t entirely comfortable with outright saying no here. Her gut overrode her knee-jerk impulse.
You
(###)###-####
The texts stopped at that point. Well after they did, however, Sunset was left with her phone in her hand, expression blank, head spinning as she tried to answer a very simple question she asked herself:
What the buck was that about?
This went in so many directions, from her perspective. Her initial take (which had seemed obvious at first) was that this was her trying to move in on Sunset because the Rainbooms wanted to do that, but it was Fluttershy doing it. Were it anyone else she’d be positive of the motive, but Fluttershy?
And granted: sure, Fluttershy would be bad at this. That made sense. It was Fluttershy, after all, but Sunset was still trying to reconcile how, throughout the entire thing, Fluttershy kept trying to bail on her. That conversation would have ended twice over if Sunset herself hadn’t been the one trying to keep the wheels turning on it. If Fluttershy was trying to be sneaky, surely she wouldn’t be trying to escape so quickly without getting something out of it. Maybe it was believable that she was simply that horrendously bad at this, but then why would the Rainbooms let her anywhere near it? Surely they'd know it wouldn't go well. And even if she was telling the truth that it wasn’t some ploy, this whole thing was- just, she- why? Why? What?
Sunset put her hand not holding her phone over her face, dragging it down it as she breathed out a haggard sigh. Her hand came to a stop over her mouth, and after a few more moments she toggled the power button on her phone to re-light the screen so she could read back and try to make sense of what just happened.
This would normally be where she tabbed out and went to ask Rarity about this, if for no other reason than for someone else to help her figure out what to think. She swapped to Rarity’s contact, even, but the comment Fluttershy had made about not always knowing how to talk to her friends stood out to her enough to make her hesitate. Was this a matter she should be getting Rarity involved in? What if something was going on that Sunset wasn't aware of? It sure seemed like something was going on that Sunset wasn't aware of.
The longer Sunset thought about it, the less she considered whether Fluttershy could be lying or not. She had a lot of uncertain feelings about it, but one of them was a slowly yet steadily growing sense of concern that had since started to rise above the others, and it had little to do with her initial suspicions.
Nothing in particular inspired her to do so, but at some point Sunset began to text.
You
The response took some time. While she waited, Sunset fiddled with the strap of her bag sitting beside her, wondering if this was a good idea. Too late now, though - the returned text arrived as though to underline this point.
(###)###-####
You
(###)###-####
It took Sunset two attempts to respond with what she meant. She got it out eventually.
You
(###)###-####
You
Fluttershy's response was not as quick as before.
(###)###-####
You
(###)###-####
You
Response didn't come. She almost didn't add something, but as the pause grew and she gave it a few moments of consideration, she decided to add it:
You
According to the continually cycling ellipsis at the bottom of the conversation, it took Fluttershy a few starts to type what she did, and with several delays.
(###)###-####
You
(###)###-####
You
Another extensive delay. Midway through it Sunset added:
You
(###)###-####
You
(###)###-####
You
A little more delay. Then:
(###)###-####
Sunset smiled to herself.
You
(###)###-####
"Alright," Sunset both typed back and said aloud to herself under her breath. "On my way." She hit "send" and looked at the text for a few more moments, just confirming to herself that this was indeed happening. She then unplugged her charger from the wall between the books that she'd snaked it through, tucked the cord into her backpack, and shouldered the bag itself as she stood with a grunt and began making her way out of the library.
About an hour had passed since she initially arrived at the school that morning, so it wasn't surprising to see the hallways occupied by a constant trickle of students, be they coming or going or simply loitering about waiting for time to pass with their respective cliques. Total avoidance was not possible anymore. Fortunately, the other students generally wanted about as much to do with her as she wanted to do with them, and the entire trek was aided by the sense of purpose Sunset felt now that she had an objective that mattered. After all, everyone is inclined to clear out of the way of someone who looks like they're on a mission, and if there's anyone on a mission you wanted to steer clear of, it's Sunset Shimmer.
Sunset pushed through the front doors to Canterlot High School and out into the dim of the late autumn morning, which hit her with a chill that made her shudder. It was barely light enough to see clearly at this hour, and this was made worse by the spitting mist that perpetually wafted down from the heavens doing their best to obscure the coming light even further. It was going to be a very gray day today, when the light did come, and the morning made no attempt to disguise this fact even during the first moments of sunrise.
High schoolers are bad drivers. It was a known fact, and it was something that was readily reflected in the dinged up, bent, and chipped doors and rear ends of the vehicles that Sunset passed as she made her way across the parking lot. One particularly poor driver years ago had forgotten which pedal made the vehicle stop and which made it go fast, because he had gone fast at a particularly inopportune moment and then failed to remedy this. No one was hurt, mercifully, but the car was totaled and the school had had nothing but trouble with the street light in the far corner of the parking lot ever since. That trouble was currently manifesting itself as a spot where the darkness of the early morning sat uncontested over several empty parking spots around it, though it was not completely empty there.
Fluttershy's car was, frankly, adorable. It was a compact pink Beetle with an off-white top and a pale blue interior, and it all but looked like it had been made with Fluttershy specifically in mind. The license plate even had a ladybug on it beneath the numbers. It was a humble thing, but there'd been few vehicles that Sunset had seen that embodied their owner quite as effectively as Fluttershy's did.
Sunset couldn't see into the car very effectively until she was only a few yards away from it, and sure enough, Fluttershy was in the driver's seat, currently sitting with her legs being hugged to her chest, chin on her knees, looking up at Sunset with the aura of a frightened and stressed cat. Sunset, in turn, smiled and gave a little wave as she approached the vehicle, watching Fluttershy's hand move just enough off her leg to push a door control - the vehicle responded by making the noise of the doors unlocking.
Sunset opened the door lightly, not wanting to challenge the quiet too much if she could help it. The passenger seat was clear, so she had no trouble seating herself, tucking her backpack in the space by her legs as she closed the door. As soon as she did, Fluttershy locked the door again.
All was still and quiet in the tiny little car, which seemed to do its best to swallow small noises up wherever it could. It was the smallest car Sunset had ever been in - it looked complete in the way it was designed, but to her it felt like there was only half a vehicle in here. It was like someone had cast a spell and shunted half of a bigger car's mass into some pocket space. It wasn't quite claustrophobic, though - likely due to a lack of just about anything that might have taken up space. Everything here was tidy, if spotted with the occasional stray hair on the softer surfaces.
Sunset took in a quiet breath, then sighed as she let her head fall back against the headrest. She turned her head a little to see Fluttershy peeking at her, though the moment their gazes found the other, Fluttershy's swiftly deflected like two same-charge poles on two magnets had intersected, timidly finding anything else to look at that wasn't the other occupant of the car.
Sunset gave a lopsided smile at this, diverting her gaze away from Fluttershy and making a note not to look straight at her. The windshield was good enough anyway. "You have a really nice car," she murmured, speaking at a volume she usually reserved for a library, or when someone was trying to sleep. "I like it."
The response would have been inaudible were it anything but total silence: "Thank you."
Sunset's gaze wandered about the vehicle's dark interior for a little while after this, though she did well to keep her eyes from passing over Fluttershy. There wasn't a lot to see while it was this dark, but she could see enough to get an idea. When she was done, her gaze fell to her lap, observing her own hands resting against the thighs of her tight jeans. You couldn't see the fading fabric in the shade. "Gas mileage must be pretty good."
Fluttershy did respond, though only in the most technical sense. The nonverbal noise she made left little meaning to be gleaned from it beyond acknowledgement.
Sunset's hands gently tapped against her legs once. She was trying to make this not be awkward, but it was proving unavoidable. It didn't feel like good energy to be silent for, though, so she let it lie for a while before she spoke again, just as quietly as the first time. "...so when I'm nervous, I tend to um...I ramble, a little bit, just to uh...to fill the air. I know you said you would prefer quiet, though, so I can uh...I can bite it back, if you'd prefer that. It's not like a...'s not a big deal or anything, just kinda...happens, so..."
There was a faint creak of seat leather as Fluttershy adjusted where she sat. Sunset could only see her out of the side of her vision, but it appeared like she had settled more into the seat as she hugged herself just a little bit more into a ball. "I can listen."
"You sure?" Sunset turned her head more at her, though she looked past her, not at her. "I'm totally fine being silent too."
Fluttershy gave a timid nod. "I might not have much to say..."
"That's okay." Sunset chuckled quietly at herself as she looked back ahead, out at the sea of cars where it began several rows down, where you could actually see where you were parking beneath operable parking lot lights. "I can keep myself pretty entertained with the sound of my own voice."
It was said as a joke. Sunset didn't hear a reaction to it, nor did she look to see if there was one. It didn't matter.
For a while, she let the silence take over again. Sunset listened to it, letting her thoughts have access to some amount of autonomy as she tried to relax. It was difficult to remain properly tense in the atmosphere of this vehicle, though it would be a lie to say she was truly relaxed.
There was almost no sound. The water coming from the sky nonstop never came down in any amount larger than the endmost point of a pin, barely visible except as the lazy curtain of mist as it passed near and through the lights of the parking lot and of the cars that had begun to appear with increasing frequency the closer it got to class time. The beads of water that occasionally streaked down the windshield were the respectful culmination of innumerable tiny droplets that didn't make so much as a whisper as they manifested and followed gravity's whims down the surfaces of glass and painted metal. Even Sunset's breaths felt loud in comparison to anything in this vehicle.
Sunset's hand found its way to her pocket and retrieved her phone. She thumbed the power button, noting the time - 6:44 AM. She thumbed the home button on reflex, and then looked at it for a few seconds before she yielded to impulse, letting it direct her to her texts with Fluttershy. She tapped a button near the number where a name would go, then added it to contacts. Fluttershy's name would greet her at the top of that conversation from now on.
"It's kinda weird," she muttered, "where things go."
There was no response to this. Sunset waited to see where that thought would take her, but it had escaped her already. She let it go, allowing another to slip into the original's place.
"When I was a filly," she began, "all I wanted to do was magic. As soon as I learned that one of the first things I was gonna learn was what kind of magic worked for me, I was gone. I was suborbital. There was nothing I wasn't ready to do. I wanted to be the best magician that ever lived. So, y'know, I would think about all the cool magic. I wanted to like," she gestured over the parking lot like she was marking a path through it, "make new rivers, and have them with these really grand names with cool stories attached to them. I wanted to make trees super duper large, and climb so high I could build cities in them and make tree kingdoms. I wanted to dig holes in the ground so deep that they'd go forever. I made up these silly ideas for new stellar bodies, so that I could make them rise and fall at different times of day, just like a princess."
Sunset chuckled as she reminisced, shaking her head at her filly self.
"Even when I was seven, I never had a shortage of ideas. They were usually stupid, but...y'know," she bobbed her head back and forth once, lightly, "stupid kid, stupid ideas. Always had 'em, though. Always big. Always wanted it to be new, or some invention. Had a thing about making up new stuff...so you'd think I'd go straight into like, conjuration or something, right? Something about making new things, or like...illusions. Sharing my visions so hard that even reality would see it my way."
There was still no response. The silence listened.
"So naturally, the first tradition of magic that I was predisposed towards turned out to be fire. Y'know, something that can't create anything lasting on its own, or that would directly fulfill any of those over-the-top ideas that I had decided were my destiny. Impermanent and temperamental fire, of all things." She smiled a little more to herself. "I was pissed. I felt cheated, and I went out of my way to prove I was good at something that I liked the sound of more. Each time I did, I failed, or whatever I did turned out to be another manifestation of fire. I got angrier and angrier each time, not realizing that I was living up to the spitting image of a pyromancer as I was doing it. Hot-headed, feisty, creative...passionate. Explosive, sometimes."
Sunset's eyes fell to her lap. She kept smiling, though her voice gathered a rueful quality to it.
"It's possible I could have done something about it back then, if I'd known and been a little smarter about it, but...nah. Nah, I was...way too caught up in my own bullshit to stop myself. Fire was impressioned on me at an early age, and by fighting so hard against it, I cemented it as a part of me forever." Her gaze drifted to her hip, where she imagined her cutie mark would be on a human. The smile had faded. "No regrets...not anymore, I mean, but...if that was something I had ever stopped and really learned from, I don't think any of us would be here right now." She looked up, towards the school building. "I'd still have my life, my home...probably would have a crown on my head that I did deserve..."
"...for...reason."
Sunset turned her head towards Fluttershy. "What'd you say, sorry?"
Fluttershy swallowed, but she did indeed speak up as she repeated: "Everything happens for a reason."
Sunset turned her head the other way, looking out the passenger door window at the entrance of CHS - her eyes traced out the barely visible signs that the entire front of the building had been rebuilt after having been destroyed. You wouldn't see them if you hadn't looked for them a thousand times already. "You think so, huh?"
It was silent enough that you could hear Fluttershy's movements from nodding. "Sometimes it takes a while before it makes sense, but nothing's truly random. There's reason in everything."
Sounds like something Celestia would say. The thought reached her lips, though her tongue didn't dare speak those words. "I hope so."
There was a soft creaking of leather as Fluttershy's legs unfurled, her shoes gently tapping against the car floor beside the pedals. "I read somewhere once that if one single cell was out of place at the time of conception, none of us would have been born. Every movement and arrangement of every bit of matter, and the time and the place...all of it needed to be perfectly as it was. If it wasn't, I wouldn't be me. At best, I'd be someone else, or maybe not here at all. It's kind of a crazy coincidence, when you think about it, but it happened. It keeps happening, too. Every time someone's born, it's because everything was just right, in the exact way it needed to be." Fluttershy brushed the hair out of her eyes. "I guess you could look at it like it's all random stuff coming together in the way that it ended up for no reason, but...I don't like looking at it like that. It sounds so futile that way."
"Sometimes that's how it feels."
"Yeah."
"It-" Sunset's voice cut out unexpectedly, and she quietly cleared her throat. "Yeah."
"It's hard, sometimes."
Sunset nodded, voice shrinking. "It's really hard."
"Yeah..."
Silence waited long enough for them to finish before it settled forward, falling over the two of them as they sat there. Something about the atmosphere had changed, though Sunset wasn't of a mind to think about it like that, as swept up in her own thoughts and the emotions that had swelled in response to them.
Nothing was said for a while. The two girls did nothing besides sit there in the dark, allowing the minutes to slip by uncontested.
Eventually, Fluttershy was the one to pipe up. "...do you um...do you mind if we listen to some music?"
"Not at all," Sunset replied pleasantly. "What kind?"
"Oh, um...I don't know, I was just going to, um, find something on the radio, I guess..."
Sunset considered this for a moment, then counter-offered, "Do you mind if we do like- do you have a playlist on your phone, or something? Something not as random as the radio."
"Oh! Um...yes?" Fluttershy shrank down in time with her voice as her hands grasped at and began to fiddle with her hair anxiously. "Um...I don't know if um...if I want to um..."
"That's okay." Sunset put as much assurance as she could into her tone without making it sound disingenuous. "Do you mind if I hook my phone up?"
Fluttershy shook her head, unraveling somewhat as she looked curiously at Sunset's phone. "What kind of music do you like?"
"Oh, just kinda whatever I feel." Sunset fumbled a little with her charger cord in the dark as she pulled it from her bag, attempting to plug one end into her phone and the other into Fluttershy's car's dashboard. "I'm a little eclectic with music."
"I'm sure it'll be ok. Just um...nothing too intense..?"
"Nah nah," Sunset waved a hand with a chuckle, "not feeling that either, don't worry."
Sunset eventually hooked her phone up, with a little help from the dashboard lighting up as Fluttershy turned the key in the ignition a bit. She had just the playlist in mind, which came up as "Breakupcore" on the dashboard display. This earned a giggle out of Fluttershy, which to Sunset felt like a victory and that the assembly of the playlist had been worth the effort. Not all of the songs on it were sad, necessarily, but they had the energy that she had always associated with feeling down and looking for a pick-me-up after a breakup, even if that meant singing along to somber lyrics alone in a dark car in the middle of the night.
She wasn't alone, of course, but that didn't stop the inevitable. She's not sure when she started exactly, but as the music played, Sunset's own instinctive need to tap, sway, or otherwise move along to the music she heard gave way to softly singing along, and she just kind of...didn't stop doing that. Normally she kept her voice down so it was inaudible to anyone but herself when others were nearby, but that didn't seem to apply here. So she sang along - not loudly, but not hiding it, either, which ended up making it sound very loud to her ears while Fluttershy cheerfully swayed and bobbed along. Something about that felt particularly freeing.
They were both late to class that morning by about twenty minutes, but even with the hasty scramble of a farewell as a signing off, Sunset still found herself in great spirits afterwards. She had no trouble getting to class with the extra spring in her step.
At some point during first period, Sunset managed to sneak out her phone and inconspicuously get one last text out with a question that she found herself in urgent need of asking.
You
Fluttershy
The response never arrived, as Sunset’s phone died before she could finish the first word. She was still all smiles for the rest of class.
Author's Note
For those interested, I had this song stuck in my head and was singing along to it while I was writing. Don't know if I get the appeal of glam rock, but The Orion Experience's music is very catchy. Would recommend.
Tonight was going to get a little bit odd. Regardless, Sunset found herself looking forward to it, and she prepared to meet it as she did most nights, if with an extra helping of anxiety to try to sort through.
She got home when it was dark out, though that was becoming harder to avoid doing as autumn took its final steps towards winter. After setting all her things in place and verifying that her phone was indeed well-charged, Sunset settled down in her bedroom, as unpleasant as it was, and laid down on the snag-ridden maroon comforter of her old bed with a gentle plop onto her back. It was 8:47 PM, so by her estimate she had made good time making it here.
All considered, there wasn’t much else she could do now except wait for the minutes to pass by. That was when the weird stuff was going to happen.
After thinking and failing to visualize precisely how the plan she’d agreed to would go down, Sunset let her hands work on muscle memory, which habitually brought her to her texts to see what was new - naturally her first destination was Rarity. Currently nothing was out of the ordinary from the last text she’d sent about an hour ago.
This was fixed in short order.
You
Rarity
Sunset couldn’t help the smile that put itself on her lips.
You
Rarity
Sunset cocked her head to one side quizzically as she typed her response.
You
Rarity
The typing stopped after that line. Sunset assumed the comma meant something, so she waited, though it took longer than she expected.
You
Still no reply. Another period of silence, though after about two thirds of a minute it finally made its way down the pipe.
Rarity
The preview said a lot. Sunset wasted no time in seeing the image in full.
The image was a picture of Rarity from the perspective of the phone in her hand when she’d taken the selfie, angled down so as to see all the way down her body. She was sprawled out on her bed, currently wearing nothing but a blue bathrobe, though “wearing” was perhaps a strong word in this case, considering how much skin was on display. The bathrobe was untied and most of the way open, providing a clear yet teasingly incomplete view of herself beneath it. The edges of the front flaps were mostly pulled aside, precisely blocking the sight of anything explicit on her chest while leaving nothing to the imagination. One leg was bent and moved over where she lay to likewise just barely block line of sight below the waist, but only barely.
Sunset swallowed as her heart sparked into overtime, not entirely able to stop herself from drinking in the sight for a while - as one does when being hit with that. She chuckled to herself as she responded to this, hands ever so slightly unsteady compared to before:
Youshit Rarity
Rarity
You
Rarity
Sunset chuckled to herself again, taking another minute to admire the view as one hand made its way over her mouth at the sight. She folded one leg over the other where she laid and squeezed her thighs together.
Wow.
You
Rarity
Youreally feeling huh?
Rarity
You
Rarity
Yeah. Yeah she did.
Holy shit.
You
Raritynow?
Younot saying it
Rarity
You
Rarity
You
The response was not immediate, though it did come after brief hesitation.
Rarity
You
”Bucking-”
You
Rarity
You
Rarity
Sunset allowed the phone to slip from her hand and drop onto the mattress next to her. The hand not already on her face made its way there, the one on her mouth went up to mirror the other across most of her face, and she let out a long, loud breath as a single drawn-out “hoo” while she began to laugh intermittent giddy laughter while her legs kicked in a barely-controlled manner. Her room was cold, yet she felt significantly warmer than she did when that conversation had started.
See, she knew tonight was going to be a little weird. She hadn’t expected that to happen. That was completely unrelated to any weirdness on the forecast tonight.
Sun and stars in the bucking sky, I am on call for a booty call. With the prettiest girl in school. Holy shit is this real?
Sunset took some time to allow this to work its way through her system a bit, venting some of the near-manic excitement so she could get her chill back on. She found limited success with it, but she could hold her phone steady and was at least confident she wouldn’t be squealing with girly delight if she went on voice now, which was probably the best she was going to get without keeping Rarity waiting. It would have to do.
Now for the odd part: Discord.
Fortunately it was not the emblem of the god of chaos that Sunset tapped on her phone’s home screen, but the app she’d been shown the day before and had her hand held throughout because she’d never signed up for something like this. Logging on was easy enough: just put in your email and password (which she had to tab out to find the note on her phone for), wrestle with the authentication three times because you managed to get it wrong despite knowing for certain you’d inputted it correctly, worry you’d somehow screwed this up despite being so sure before, then be let in the fourth time without knowing why or what you did differently. And of course, remember why you hated these stupid human things in the first place.
…no? Just her? Might be just her. She wouldn’t be surprised if it was just her.
Buck my life.
Regardless, she was in. This was some app that existed for playing video games, supposedly (or that’s how it was explained to her), but it also had some functionality in it that was rather convenient for speaking to multiple people at the same time. It even had video and streaming capabilities.
Sunset wasn’t sure what the difference was between this and a phone, frankly. She also wasn’t sure why this had been suggested as opposed to regular old video calls, but she trusted that there was wisdom in it somewhere. Perhaps it was a data thing. Or it was just more convenient. Y’know, for people who could do this easily. Not her, that was to say. Whatever.
There was only a single server that Sunset had access to: a server with a default icon that only she and two other members were a part of, which were Rarity and Fluttershy. An animated picture of a kitten rolled onto its back in the chat - the only message posted, put there for demonstration purposes when this whole thing had been explained to her.
Rarity’s icon of a diamond was in the voice chat, so Sunset called upon the only know-how she really felt sure of for this thing and tapped to join. A single note played from the phone speaker, and Rarity’s voice blessed her ears in greeting soon after. ”There you are! I was starting to get worried.”
“Eyup, sorry.” Sunset chuckled apologetically. “This thing still hates me.”
“Well you made it, and that’s all that matters.”
“Barely. You almost bucking killed me back there.”
“Did I?” Rarity’s voice was far too innocent-sounding to be even remotely genuine, even if there wasn’t photographic evidence saved on Sunset’s phone proving it. “Oh well! Silly me, these things happen.”
“Yeah, happens all the time if you’re built like a goddess like you are.”
Rarity’s calm demeanor exploded as a fit of giggles burst out of her - those musical, high-pitched giggles that were far and above Sunset’s favorite.
“It is not fair.” Sunset laughed along, whatever else she was going to say falling to the wayside in favor of listening to the sound of Rarity’s voice. Such pretty laughter... ”So not fair.”
Rarity giggled gleefully for a while longer before the stream of them dried up to the sound of an airy little happy noise. “Let me see your face, darling,” she sighed, voice warm and inviting. “I want to see you.”
Sunset’s fingers twitched to immediately comply, though as her eyes focused on the screen, the unfamiliarity of the sight made her hesitate. “Uh, I’m- ok how do you do this again?”
Rarity then had to walk Sunset through the process for the second or third time. It was simple, however, and before long Sunset had the privilege of beholding Rarity again whilst being beheld in turn.
“There you are!” Rarity still had that bathrobe on, though it was indeed actually being worn instead of only technically. She was laying on her bed on her belly, the fine purple sheets and lavishly regal-looking pillows giving her a pretty strong “royalty on her day off” look in that bathrobe. She perched her chin atop both of her hands as she beamed fondly at Sunset like she hadn’t seen her in weeks. “Hi, my darling~”
“Hey.” Sunset had rolled onto her stomach as well, chin in hand as she smiled back just as fondly. ”Your darling, huh?”
“Mhm.” Rarity’s voice was so soft it was almost plush against Sunset’s ears. “Do you mind?”
“What, being yours?”
Rarity nodded.
Sunset rested her chin atop her arms as she peered into the phone screen with a smile. “I’d have to be crazy to mind that. You’re my favorite.”
Rarity giggled, though it came out more like a purr. Her legs gently kicked behind her where she lay. “What a coincidence, you’re my favorite as well.”
“I’m glad.”
“Me too.”
Silence fell between them, rosy and embracing, as it so often did. Sunset hadn’t been keeping good track of time, but as she and Rarity shared another of those tender silences together, she lost track of it completely. The affection flowing between their eyes at one another was so thick you could all but reach out and touch it. Sunset wanted to swaddle herself in it - with such blankets to call hers, she'd never want for warmth again.
Sunset could lay here like this for hours. She knew this because she'd done it before. However, that was not going to be quite as simple nor private an affair tonight, because with a chime of the app, their third member joined the call, immediately signaling her arrival further by blurting, "Sorry! Sorry sorry sorry, I got distracted talking to my mom."
"Quite alright, darling," Rarity sighed, doing her best to pass off her slight start with a detailed examination of her nails. "We've simply been getting a head start on the socializing in the meantime, Sunset and I. Right, darling?"
'Socializing' was a curious word for the latest addition to Sunset's photo collection, in her opinion, though the topic itself and the way Rarity looked at her were more than sufficient incentives to keep such remarks to herself. "Yeah, we're just chilling." Sunset rolled a little onto her side to take some of the pressure off her neck, propping her cheek up on one hand. "Sorry if uh, if I'm quiet here, by the way. Two people on the other end of the line already feels weird.”
“It’s okay, Sunset.” There was a clatter of something against what sounded like a desk on Fluttershy’s end of the call, who had yet to appear in video. “Um, it’s a little weird for me too. I’m used to being able to let everyone else talk, so um, I might be quiet also…”
Sunset shrugged with her one shoulder. “Worse comes to worse, we can all just stare at each other awkwardly for the next three hours.”
Rarity tisked as she loftily turned her hand over, oh-so-occupied with those nails of hers. “Well if between the three of us we’re reduced to that, I dare say we deserve it. We’ll figure something out, surely.”
“Look, I got this. If it gets way too quiet and weird, I can just burp really loudly.”
“Kindly do not,” Rarity droned, casting Sunset and her smirk a judging look. “I get more than enough of that from Rainbow Dash already. Let’s maybe not aspire to live by her example.”
Sunset opened one arm in an ‘option’s open’ way while Fluttershy giggled. “It’ll definitely spark conversation, ‘sall I’m saying.”
A disdainful scoff. “Oh, it’ll spark something alright…”
“Like a fire in your heart?”
“More like a fire under your pillow when I set your bed ablaze in your sleep, miss Shimmer.”
Sunset broke out into laughter, momentarily creating a harmony with Fluttershy’s. “Well that will be something to talk about, so I guess that’s just the price of business around these parts.”
“Your hair already looks kind of like fire,” Fluttershy pointed out.
“Yeah, perfect, see? I can even go into school the next day. No one will notice a thing.”
”Your hair is, um, really pretty by the way…”
Sunset, already primed to retort with something clever-sounding, was momentarily disarmed by this compliment. “Thank you,” she said graciously, with a surprised little chuckle and small flip of the scarlet and gold-streaked locks where they came forward past her shoulder at this angle. “I mean it’s not like- I haven’t like, done anything with it lately, so I’m not exactly at peak performance over here…”
“It is nice hair.” Rarity’s agreement sounded more like a concession. “Regretfully it would be a waste to burn it, no matter how insufferable you can become…”
“High praise, coming from you.”
Rarity tilted her head at Sunset with a half-lidded gaze, an eyebrow quirking. “The hair, or that you’re insufferable?”
“Oh, you know,” Sunset shrugged with a coy smile, “Little of column A, little of column B…”
“Mhm,” Rarity monotoned as Fluttershy giggled again. She returned her lofty gaze to her nails, though she had a lazy smile on her lips as she did. “At least you’re honest about it.”
“I’m a lot of things.”
”This I can’t contest. You are, truthfully, multiple things.”
“Honestly and truly. I am a number of things equal to two or more.”
“One of which is insufferable.”
Sunset started replying, though sudden laughter midway through stole the air reserved for the words and left her with only a wheeze, forcing her to make a second attempt. “That too.”
Fluttershy let out another stream of giggles from her as-of-yet faceless corner of the call. “You two are funny.”
“Call it a coping mechanism,” Rarity quipped, finally seeing fit to stop ceaselessly examining her (probably flawless) nails, though the regal loftiness had yet to be abandoned. “I’ve needed something to get me through the day, look at this g- Look at her!” She stabbed a finger at her screen, intending Sunset who was smirking more and more. “Look at that face! She knows what she did. She knows what she puts me through.”
”No idea what you’re talking about,” Sunset cheekily replied.
”Oh I’m sure. I’m sure you have no clue.” Rarity huffily reached off-screen where she lay as Fluttershy continued giggling, retrieving a glass of water from a nightstand out of sight of her phone, or laptop. She took a sip from the glass with a disdainful shake of her head. “Unbelievable woman…”
Sunset leaned back a bit where she lay, a wide grin plastered on her face from the play. “I’ve been called worse things.”
“I’m sure, darling, I’m sure.” The glass was put back down out of frame. “Very sure of that.”
Conversation lulled, though it wasn’t an unwelcome silence - not to Sunset’s ears, anyway. She let out a quiet sigh, releasing a little bit more of the tension that she’d been feeling going into this. It had thus far proven unfounded - mostly due to Rarity, she reasoned. Being able to bounce off of her and play and joke helped a lot.
I’d be so much worse off without her.
The one to break the quiet was a meek-sounding Fluttershy. “Um, confession? Sunset?”
Sunset came a bit more into focus. “Yeah?”
“Um, I’ve um…” It sounded like Fluttershy was physically retreating from the microphone, the way her voice shrank. ”I’ve meant to say you have pretty hair for, um, a long time, but I never, um, had…um…you know…”
“Never had the chance?”
The nod in the pause was audible. ”Yes.”
“Ah, well,” Sunset chuckled, though a somber note had entered her voice. “Better late than never, huh?”
Rarity spoke up, her faux-affronted tone vacant from her voice in favor of something far more earnest. “I, for one, am very grateful for the chance to be able to talk to you like I have the last few months, Sunset. I don’t think it exaggeration to say it’s been an improvement to my life to have you in it.”
Sunset was, very briefly, totally disarmed by this and was left feebly trying to find words. “Geez,” she finally managed, lamely, and could not stop the laugh that followed. “Geez, alright.” The hand not holding her phone rubbed her face as she smiled and chuckled bashfully. “Really coming at me swinging here. Um…”
“She’s been very kind to me,” Fluttershy pitched in, voice hushed yet still somehow louder than her at her ‘peeking out of my shell’ voice. “It’s nice…”
Whilst Sunset was in ruins from these heartfelt praises and struggling to do much more than gasp like a fish out of water in their wake, Rarity chose then to ask, “What is the full story there, if I may ask? I’ve heard the abridged version, but…”
Fluttershy, to her credit, gave Sunset a moment to speak, but Sunset had taken a step back from the conversation to get her head back on straight, so she went on. “…there’s, um, not a lot more to say about it, um, actually…I was kind of sad, and Sunset sat with me and talked with me so I wasn’t lonely anymore. And um…we’ve been sitting together in the mornings since then. Listening to music and stuff…um, we ate breakfast together on, um, Thursday…”
“I hope she’s been well-behaved, at least.”
“Oh, very!” Fluttershy’s voice filled out swiftly as she audibly brightened. “I was a little scared to talk to her at first, but she’s been nothing but nice to me. It’s very nice.”
Sunset found some of the relaxation reversing itself as she listened. It was just Rarity, but Sunset nonetheless found herself a bit tense as everything was spilled. “I uh…I didn’t realize we were gonna be so candid about that.”
The blank look on Fluttershy could be heard in the silence. Rarity gave Sunset an odd look, though it became slightly troubled after a moment. “Did you not want me to know?”
“Well no, it’s not like that,” Sunset said quickly, raising one hand as though to bring that train of thought to a halt. “I just- I-I dunno, I- I’m not used to like- I’m not used to this like, open book stuff, you know? It’s…it’s weird for me, I don’t normally uh…it’s weird, being so like, open, and-“
”Sorry…”
”Nonono, it’s fine! It’s fine,” Sunset laughed nervously. “It’s fine, honest, it’s just uh…I’m not used to it? I’m not like, trying to like, keep secrets here, I don’t mind you like, knowing, I’m just not…used to…sharing, I…I guess.” She scratched the back of her neck as she found something in her room besides her phone to look at. “I feel so like, maladjusted saying it.”
Rarity visibly mulled this over for a few moments. She then reached out of frame and retrieved her glass of water again, sipping from it before informing her, “There’s nothing wrong with wanting some privacy, darling…it’s perhaps a bit selfish of me, but I do find myself wanting to know more about you where I can. I am, of course,” the glass was placed aside again, “fully aware it’s not my place to know everything, but if you did feel comfortable opening up, it’s…I always appreciate it, darling. I love it when you share with me.”
“Okay.” Sunset’s voice felt small in her throat. She swallowed. “I’ll- I’m…yeah.”
Rarity nodded in response. The moment she let the topic go could be observed when she rolled onto her side more, adopting a position not unlike Sunset’s. In saying that, however, Sunset was not wearing a rather short bath robe, something Rarity became visibly conscious of as she shifted position and kept her legs together while she moved. Midway through the movement, she quipped, “Meanwhile, I’ll endeavor to not flash everyone in the call right now.”
Sunset couldn’t help the snorting sputter that forced its way out of her throat. She tried to sound as disappointed as she could as she moaned, “Aww.”
“Oh don’t you ’aww’ me!” Rarity huffed snootily as she tightened the sash around her waist. ”Exceptionally unladylike behavior, miss Shimmer. Poor form.”
“Look,” Sunset chuckled, already feeling the tension from before starting to leave her, “I’m a lot of things, but a lady isn’t one of them, alright?”
”Evidently!” Rarity crossed her arms over her chest and set herself in what was a very convincing-looking affronted state of huffiness. Quite believable, if you didn’t know her. “Honestly.”
Meanwhile Sunset just grinned widely. She didn’t speak immediately following this, and it was in the space between conversation beats that Fluttershy peeped up, sounding a little vulnerable: ”I didn’t do something bad, did I? Talking about..?”
The swift “No” that came from both Sunset and Rarity was simultaneous, though it was Sunset who rushed to further assure. “No it’s cool, it’s cool, it- honest, it’s fine. It’s weird, and- and like, ok maybe like if it was just anyone I’d- but like, it’s Rarity, right? It’s- yeah it- it’s fine. There’s,” she laughed nervously once, “there’s a lot worse things than my best friend learning I’m hanging out with one of her friends in the morning, you know?”
Rarity smiled a little.
”Okay.” Fluttershy still sounded like she was half-hidden behind something on her end of the line, but a lot less like she was considering hiding away completely if it got worse. ”I’ll, um…I can keep it between, um, the three of us, if um, if you’d like that more…”
“That- yeah I’m cool with that.” Sunset considered that a little more seriously for a second or two before she went on. She didn’t know Fluttershy nearly as well as she did Rarity, but Fluttershy was also just…the nicest person, from what she’d seen? And everyone seemed to agree on this, so… “Yeah, that- yeah. That’s fine. I trust you two. Just um…just be cool.”
”Okay.” Fluttershy’s voice grew in tandem with the little smile in her voice. “I can do that.”
Sunset smiled back at the smile she could feel coming from Fluttershy, though when she went to speak it didn’t happen immediately. She tried again, and it came out as a full exhale of a chuckle, letting her head hang for a second or so. “…alright, so like, being completely honest? I was really nervous about this call and I’m glad both of you are cool.”
Fluttershy cooed a small touched-sounding noise. Rarity, meanwhile, got a pleased - almost smugly so - smile and informed her a little too warmly to be coy, “I told you it’d be okay.”
“Yeah,” Sunset laughed once, then sighed pleasantly. “Yeah, you did.”
The conversation went on for another hour. A lot of it was just Rarity and Sunset doing their thing while Fluttershy occasionally chimed in, giggling all the while at their antics. By the time 10 PM rolled around, Rarity was showing a great deal of fatigue, and between that and Fluttershy needing to rest from all the socializing, the three called it there and hung up for the night.
Sunset would remain in texts with Rarity for a few hours more. They traded four or five photos of themselves with the other from the comfort of bed, which Sunset would have to take as consolation for not getting the opportunity that had been under consideration prior to the exhaustion setting in. It would be a lie to say there wasn’t a little disappointment there, but the undivided attention of Rarity was never a bad thing. Nor were the sights.
For once, it was Rarity’s phone dying that would mark the conclusion of their evening together. Sunset found this disproportionately amusing.
Author's Note
Happy Halloween, everyone!
There were few sounds that Sunset had grown to loathe more than the distinct noise a lock’s latch arm made as it impacted against the inside of a door frame. It was a sound that usually came as a surprise, heard when she had counted on passage and realized, much to her irritation, that there would be none of that.
It was early morning. Sunset had gone straight to the locker rooms, as she always did, yet the hallway was as far as she'd made it. Despite yanking on the girl’s locker room door with her full body weight, the door did not open. A few good pulls and pushes rattled the audibly latched lock, yet it did nothing to shake it out of place or unjam any potentially stuck mechanisms.
Growling harshly, Sunset marched the half dozen steps over to the boy’s locker room and gave the handle a hard yank, yet was met with the exact same noise. Locked.
Sunset checked her phone, pupils all but slicing grooves into the glass where her gaze raked across its surface to find the top of the screen: 5:46 AM, Friday. Not Thursday, Friday . It should be open today, yet here she was, in the hallway in front of a locker room that was distinctly not open.
This was frustrating enough, but what really had Sunset’s internal furnace belching smoke was that this was not the first time this had happened this week. Wednesday, too, had been just like this. She had been more willing to deal with it then, as flukes did occasionally happen, but this was twice in a row now that the doors to the locker rooms had been locked. There was no other time in the day that she’d have functionally unrestricted access to the showers here while also being completely free from prying eyes, or just people in general. It was the perfect setup for her, and she should be able to take advantage of it - should being the operative word.
It was not the biggest deal, in the grand scheme of things. There were other sinks she could brush her teeth in around the school, and while the showers were in significantly shorter supply, she did have ways to clean that didn’t require one, or even hot water of any description. This was simply the most convenient and pleasant way to do it. She could do without.
But that wasn’t the point. The point was this was her routine. This was something she had counted on, and had been counting on for quite some time, and she had been denied it for no discernible reason. Most would consider this a basic commodity at best, inferior and redundant at worst, but it was a luxury to Sunset, and one that she had no access to in any other way because of her living situation. Control and basic privileges had been stripped from her, completely without warning or cause, and the sting of injustice was infuriating. She had so little to her name as it was, and she was dirty, and it was going to be the weekend and she’d be dirty the entire week and she hated feeling like this because it was gross, and she was stiff, and she’d had a long walk in the cold to even get here and some relaxation would have been nice and she had just wanted a hot shower and couldn’t because some fucking idiot had started locking doors that had never been locked and she just wanted to be clean and there's no one she could talk to about this and she hated it and it was stupid and pointless and unfair and bullshit.
SLAM went Sunset’s sole against the door, delivered hard enough that it shoved her back into the narrow hallway till she bumped into the far wall. The cacophonous boom of crashing wood and rattling metal could be heard echoing into the adjacent hallways and reverberating in the spacious room beyond the threshold, yet passage to that space was no closer than it was before. It may as well have been a wall with a gender sign and a handle attached to it, for all the good it did her.
It had been less than ten minutes since Sunset walked in the building, and already everything had gone wrong. All she had to show for her morning so far was a backpack bulging with a towel and toiletries she couldn’t use, a head of hair getting greasier by the day, fuzzy-feeling teeth, a sense of normalcy compromised unexpectedly, a significantly elevated pulse, and a sore foot.
Sunset didn’t remember the storming back to the library. The next thing she knew, her back had impacted a bookshelf, and she slid her way down it to the floor with a slightly-too-hard impact with the carpeted floor. She shoved her backpack away from her as she curled her knees loosely to her chest, put her arms over them, then let her head fall forward till her forehead met her forearm, releasing a blistering breath that all but smelled of charcoal. Once upon a time it might have.
It was in times like these that Sunset felt a surge of bitterness rise up out of the ugliest parts of her in the form of resentment towards the human world itself. It wouldn’t allow magic to function, so her magic never had a chance to express itself through her when her emotions erupted like this. At least if she could physically steam, or literally smolder, or sometimes even spit actual embers whilst spouting off, she'd feel like her magic had her back, right there beside her and just as angry as she was - “arcane solidarity,” the sensation was called. For a caster naturally disposed towards such an emotionally-sensitive magic as the tradition of Fire, it could be very strong, sometimes even euphoric. It was a satisfaction that she missed, and often when she came down off her fury in its absence, the lack of the pyro high left her with a crash hard enough to leave a crater with no counterbalance.
Every time she lost her temper was another reminder that she had left a part of herself behind when she went through that portal. She swallowed it down well, most days, but sometimes it ached too much to ignore, or she was left too weak to weather it like she normally could. It felt like she’d lost a limb, and the reminders of its absence were everywhere, all around her, every day. Sometimes - like now - it got to her. An ashen tide came rolling in from the dark corners of her mind, and Sunset could do little more than watch it take her under as she began to drown.
Sunset missed magic. She missed her magic especially. She missed being able to take care of herself, and not having to sneak around to enjoy some of the most basic comforts she’d thrown away her rights to like a fool. She missed feeling safe and secure with her living conditions. She missed home. She missed feeling like a unicorn, or even just like a pony. Above all, though, what she missed most was feeling like her life was worth living.
"Sunset?"
It's not clear when Fluttershy appeared. Her voice was very close to Sunset, somewhere between her and the mouth of the aisle she had tucked herself into.
Sunset didn't move. Her head remained on her arms, face obscured.
There was a faint sound of fabric rubbing against the carpet. Fluttershy had gotten closer, yet the softening of her voice left it sounding just about the same. "Are you ok?"
Still Sunset didn't move. It took a few seconds to will up the energy to speak, and when she did finally croak out a response, her voice barely sounded like her own. "No."
More soft shuffling, much closer now. Fluttershy's presence felt directly beside her. "Would a hug make it better?"
Sunset meant to give a single, humorless laugh, but her throat was too tight and sticky-feeling to let the air up, so she ended up merely bobbing slightly with cynical intent. "Yeah, right around my neck. Hard as you can. Squeeze till I stop moving."
There was no response to this. Rather than words, there was a feeling of something touching Sunset's side, which pressed softly into her side. A gentle weight fell over her shoulders, ending in a dainty hand that held her delicately in place. Sunset curled her legs tighter to her chest. Her rib cage felt like it was trying to crush her heart completely, and her damp eyes prickled and stung against the aged leather they were being compressed against through her eyelids.
Sunset had nothing to say. Fluttershy didn't speak, either, not for a long time. No prying, no questioning, no noise, nothing. Just a soft, gentle presence there with Sunset. Touch and an aura of acceptance and care.
Hours and seconds swapped places. Sunset didn't think about much of anything; the smothering mountain of ash sitting atop her gave little opportunity for clarity, just a crushing depression that sucked all the color out of her body and made every breath feel like a marathon. She didn't want to move, didn’t want to think…didn’t want to be.
"Do you want me to get Rarity?"
The shaking of her head didn't take long. Speaking took much longer. "Don't want her to see me like this."
"She cares about you."
The words were so positive, yet somehow they felt like dull razors to Sunset. "She has enough problems."
The response was not immediate, though eventually Fluttershy let out an acquiescing, "Okay..." The touch against her side shifted, leaning a little more into her - a second weight of an arm came forward over Sunset's shoulders now. A soft hand rested against the far side of her head, while the weight of a head softly laying against her own was felt on the other. "Just don't forget, okay? She cares. I care."
Sunset didn't say anything. Her gut said to resist, but the ash was too heavy for even that. She leaned a little more into Fluttershy, who held her that much more closely. Fingers combed their way through Sunset’s hair as Fluttershy began to gently stroke her head where she held her.
It was such a soft energy she had. Tender - almost ethereally so - and warm, like a cloud made of love. Being held by her was like resting her head on heaven's doorstep.
It was nice. Fluttershy was nice. Everything about her felt good.
Time passed. How much was anyone's guess, but enough for the tears on Sunset's face behind her jacket's sleeves to start to dry of their own accord. At some point she lifted her head a little bit for the first time since sitting down, moving her arm to wipe at her eyes with the side of a loose fist before setting it back down again at an angle, so that she could look at Fluttershy. It was an angle, though not the best one - hunched down as she was and with Fluttershy sitting forward to hold her, most of what Sunset saw was her middle torso, and her lap with her legs folded beneath herself.
Sunset's eyes drifted about at random until they focused on something that stood out in that moment: a narrow strip of skin on Fluttershy, maybe a centimeter tall around her waist where her skirt stopped and her top pulled slightly up.
Completely on impulse, she mumbled, "I can see your belly."
The response was a soft squeak of an "eep" as Fluttershy pulled back to cover herself. It seemed to be a knee-jerk reaction, because most if not all of the urgency left her as she gently tugged down her shirt, giving a now weakly grinning Sunset the world's smallest frowny face.
It wasn't that funny. It wasn't funny at all, really, though Sunset found herself chuckling nonetheless. "Sorry."
"Mean..."
"If I said it's a cute belly, will that make it better?"
The way Fluttershy writhed in place, randomly moved her arms about as though trying to find what best angle to hold herself at, and then put her hands over her face to hide suggested "No" was the answer to that. Sunset found her face splitting into a much wider grin at the sight, her next apology broken up by the anemic chuckles that slipped from her.
It was such a small, simple interaction, yet it marked the moment when color started to slowly creep back into Sunset's world. The depression was still heavy, but motes of light were visible.
Eventually Fluttershy recovered, slipping over to Sunset's side again with a pout on her face. "Don't bully me...I'm trying to make you feel better."
"Bullying makes me feel better."
"Cruel..."
"Yep." Sunset angled her head so that it was vertical rather than horizontal, staring out across the aisle with a distant smile resting on her lips. "It's what I do. You should know by now."
Fluttershy crossed her arms with a tiny huff, pretending to be affronted in a very obvious way. "Well, if you want more hugs from me, you should be nicer."
Sunset hummed in faux-thought, gaze shifting to the side to look at Fluttershy, though not her face. Her eyes instinctively found her stomach. "I do like hugs..."
"Mine are only for nice people. Will you be nice to me?"
There was something clever to be had here, probably, but Sunset was far too drained to capitalize on it, and instead simply said, "Yeah."
This was more than enough for Fluttershy, who beamed happily and opened up her arms to put over Sunset. Sunset met her halfway, unraveling a bit from the ball she'd bunched herself up into to return the embrace. "Then I have hugs for you."
That sounded like a perfectly good way to spend a morning to Sunset. So she did.
Unfortunately, there wasn’t much time left at that point until classes began. They stayed like that for about as long as possible, but Fluttershy had to be on the opposite side of the building for her first period, which meant she needed to be the one to break away first.
Before she did, she made certain to ask: “Do you feel better?”
“Yeah.” Sunset offered as bright a smile as she could. A curtain of gray fog still hung over her, but it was nothing like what it was before. She was feeling drained and slightly melancholic, but in a much better mood. “Sorry for skipping out on breakfast.”
Fluttershy smiled and shook her head, catching one pink strand of hair as it fell out of place in front of her eyes. “It’s okay, there’ll be other times. I’m just happy I could help. If you’re ever feeling sad, don’t be afraid to let me know, okay? Even if, um, hugs don’t sound very good…”
“I’ll keep you in mind.” Not that she could think of a time where the touch of this beacon of good vibes sounded like a bad idea. “Now don't be late. I'll see you around.”
Fluttershy flashed a bright smile, waved goodbye as she backpedaled through the library entrance, and then scurried along on her way.
Sunset stepped into the hall after her, though she didn’t follow or leave herself. She loosely crossed her arms over her chest and watched Fluttershy make her way through the thinning crowd of students, looking on even after she passed around a corner and out of sight. She remained like that for a few minutes, lost in a haze of thoughts as she looked off at nothing.
It was odd how she never noticed how pleasant Fluttershy was to be around. You’d think she would have known to pay a little closer attention to someone like that. Sunset was no stranger to missed opportunities as of late, but this one stood out to her in that moment. It would have been nice to have a friend like Fluttershy a lot sooner.
Better late than never, I guess.
The warning bell chimed once, stirring Sunset from her thoughts and informing her that she was, given where she needed to be, already late. Sunset rolled her eyes with a weary sigh, then meandered back into the library to grab her bag and phone before making her own way to class with one more tardy on the pile.
As nice as it had been to spend an hour hugging one of the sweetest girls Sunset had ever met, her day never fully recovered from the emotional explosion that had started it. The inability to focus would be plaguing her well into the afternoon at the rate it seemed intent on going, and her whole day was made just a little bit more unpleasant by the persistent sensation of being in need of a cleaning. She found time to brush her teeth at one point, but the grease in her hair was enough to weigh it down and make it behave slightly differently than normal, as well as become a source of an additional thin film of oil on her already oily face that a wash cloth would only do so much to fix. She was a little embarrassed that Fluttershy had been touching her so much today, in hindsight. She hated being unwashed.
All in all, Sunset spent the day quite distracted. Her funk never quite went away, and if she wasn’t spacing out, she was busy trying to think of a solution to her problem that had put her in this funk in the first place.
The locker rooms being locked in the mornings was generally just really bad for Sunset. She had no way of knowing if that was going to be a new trend or not, and she couldn’t ask about it without revealing that she was going into the locker rooms that early in the first place - something she wasn’t certain she was strictly allowed to be doing or not. She definitely wasn’t supposed to be using both of them, however; her use of the boy’s locker room might be a candidate for why access was being cracked down on, assuming that was what was happening - stupid play, purely greed-based decision. Going after slightly higher water pressure in the wrong locker room like an idiot might have cost her the ability to bathe at school.
Sunset really didn’t want to use them after school hours, either. Sure, it’d be a lot more likely to be open because of extracurricular stuff, but that meant people would be more likely to see her doing it. She didn’t want to be known for using the school facilities as often as she used them. That invited too many questions…but she also needed to bathe. Being filthy for less than a week had already been annoying her, going weeks at a time would drive her mad. The stress from living like that was vastly more likely to kill her than the ‘no heat in winter’ thing, in her mind.
Sunset swerved in her thoughts to avoid that topic. Again.
As usual, Rarity seemed to know just when to reach out.
Rarity
Sunset smiled. She glanced up at the teacher’s desk and found the English teacher contending with one Trixie Lulamoon, who was currently attempting to convince him that emojis were a type of punctuation and that she shouldn’t be docked points for it. Great and Powerful she may be, but getting those points back on that paper she was not, given by how that seemed to be going.
You
Rarity
…right, Fluttershy and Rarity talked. Sunset had to recall that early on to arrest her own habitual attempt to unravel whatever conspiracy was afoot that gave her that information.
You
Rarity
"…hm."
Theoretically, yes. But getting to Rarity’s house in general had proven a monumental annoyance - at least, when trying to be as thorough and witness-free as she preferred to be. Rarity was fairly busy, and while she had proven more than happy to set time aside for her, the real nuisance that they both had taken great strides to keep out of the picture was Sweetie Belle. They both knew exactly how that was going to go, even if they did stay on their best behavior…which, at this point, they were not especially interested in.
You
Rarity
You
Rarity
Sunset sighed wistfully at that. If only…
You
Rarity
You
Raritythat desperate, are we?
You
Rarityare that desperate
Sunset weighed whether she wanted to say what thought came to mind. She glanced about to ensure no one was terribly interested in looking this way, then typed:
You
Rarity
…Sunset cracked a wide, warm grin at that.
You
Rarity
You
Rarity
You
Rarity
Sunset went to respond, then flicked a glance up from her phone to the teacher’s desk as Trixie stormed back to her own desk. The line that had gathered would be done in a fraction of the time it had taken to deal with that one girl.
You
Rarity didn’t respond for a time. Sunset continually glanced up at the front of the class, conscious of her window closing while something rather important was unfinished.
Rarity
Unfortunate.
You
Rarity
It was. Sunset understood, and cared about Rarity a lot, but sometimes it was genuinely painful to have that last second backing out happen when she was ready for this weeks ago.
You
Rarity
Sunset smiled, replying to the heart with one of her own. She was okay waiting for now…but boy was she hoping it was coming soon.
The conversation was cut there, as the teacher’s attention was no longer so divided. Just as well, as the topic didn’t go much further than that.
Sunset wished that she wasn’t frustrated with that whole thing. She’d love to have bottomless patience and be nothing but supportive like she was putting on the face for. She felt bad that she was frustrated, but she knew exactly what she wanted and it was to fuck that bombshell of a girl because Harmony above and below she was hot and clearly there was interest. In hindsight, there had been interest possibly going back as far as the beginning. This had been a temptation in the back of her head for months, and it was actually being discussed as something she could finally indulge in and she was really getting sick of this constant dodging around it. Waiting was getting painful, and that was without the zig-zagging.
And on the topic of other things that were painful: being dirty. Still no solution there, either…but speaking with Rarity had briefly touched on a topic that gave her an idea. She hated it, mind, but she also didn’t see a way around it, so with a bothered sigh, Sunset loitered in the hallway after English got out and, rather than be seen speaking directly to Fluttershy, she texted her.
You
The response wasn’t immediate, but she answered soon enough.
Fluttershy
Wrong, but a nice sentiment.
…was she seriously about to ask this? Surely she had better options…but if she did, she couldn’t think of them.
Buck my life.
You
Fluttershy
You
Fluttershy
You
Fluttershy
Sunset felt caution rearing its head to take stock of this. It was Fluttershy, but that didn't mean it didn't still sound like one of the Rainbooms trying to move in on her.
You
Fluttershy
You
Fluttershy
Sunset tapped her fingernail rhythmically against the case of her phone with a pensive stare at the screen. She had a fair bit she could say on the topic. As she went to do so, however, the warning bell chimed throughout the hallways of CHS, causing any students still lingering in the halls to scramble to get to their destination on time.
You
And she did. Perhaps Ms. Harshwinny wouldn’t have appreciated having her class used for such things in lieu of, you know, paying attention to the lesson, but think about it she did.
She did have a few concerns. Sunset didn’t like relying on others, though if this was a one-off thing it would probably be fine. She didn’t know if it would be a one-off thing, though. There was no way to know if the locker rooms were going to be open in the mornings anymore.
Did it really matter, though? This was the closest thing to a solution that she had. She knew of no alternatives that didn’t sound like her quality of life irrevocably deteriorating. Did it really matter if it was good or not when it was this or nothing?
Sunset felt the depression cloying at the edges of her awareness again. She sighed, head hanging a bit as she came to terms with this. She had to wait for an opportunity to be excused for the bathroom, then texted along the way:
You
Fluttershy
Somehow cute even over texts. Not sure how that works. Sunset chuckled under her breath as she shook her head to herself, sticking her phone into her pocket.
That would be the last of her texting for a while. Unbeknown to her, she'd forgotten to charge her phone that day, so she only made it to sundown with further texts and calls before the battery died and consigned her to a sensible bedtime for once.
It had been several years since Sunset Shimmer had come to the world of humans, and daylight savings was something Sunset still hadn't gotten used to. She didn't get it conceptually, and the fact that no one else really seemed to either boggled her mind. It wasn't just clunky in effect, but all it seemed to do was reduce the amount of time that the average person got to enjoy sunlight, seeing as it only ever seemed to make the issue of shorter days worse. She knew some people back home who would get pretty up in arms about the idea of reducing time spent under the sun, which could be considered a holy symbol back in Equestria. Those people would also probably consider her a heretic for backtalking Princess Celestia and that she deserved to be gently roasted over an open fire for her audacity, but even lunatics got to sound like they were onto something once in a while. Something something broken clock, something something twice a day.
The point was that it was dark out. It was dark out now, and it was dark out most other times that weren't school hours, during which time she was usually inside anyway and thus saw comparatively little if it. It was disorienting for Sunset. She felt like she hadn't seen the sun in days despite knowing full well she had, and it felt like it was something like 4 in the morning despite not even being 10 PM yet.
Sunset lay huddled in a ball, fully dressed in her day clothes beneath the tattered maroon covers as she stared out across the surface of her stained pillow at the impenetrable mass of black she knew a wall would be. She wasn't comfortable, and had in fact been spending progressively less and less time being comfortable because of the amount of time she was required to spend in her clothing - something which had, historically, always made sleeping hard for her. She felt prickly and restless, the usual calm that she could slip into while stilling her thoughts and body perpetually being chased off by the constant feeling of discomfort she was in.
She wanted to undress right now. Sometimes she could get away with it, depending on the temperature outside, but those times were well in the past by now. This was the coldest night yet, and Sunset wasn't even able to take her jacket off beneath the covers anymore without losing more heat than she was able to retain. She could see nothing in this pitch-black room, but when she had pulled her phone out, she'd been able to see her breath when the screen lit up.
Sunset had done as much as she could to weather-proof this abominable little dwelling. She'd taped up all the windows, negating the glass's ability to leak heat out behind the curtains, and she'd stuffed material and fabric under and into every crevice she was able to reach, but it didn't seem to make a difference. As the nights got colder, so too did her room, as well as every other room in the house. She'd long since run out of candles to shove the air up a couple of degrees, and there was nowhere in this building that she felt comfortable lighting a fire that she wasn't concerned would set the entire place ablaze, especially with all the dust around. This was barely even shelter, at this point. The roof over her head wasn't nothing, but for all the insulation it provided, this place was essentially being outdoors with extra steps. Come winter proper, she may as well take this comforter and lie down on the sidewalk outside.
She'd been hopeful, for a time. Sunset had thought that there was a chance that she'd be able to pull this off on her own using only what she was able to get her hands on without witnesses, but as days crept by, she found that hope dwindling away as the temperature continued to drop. It was going to get colder, and it wouldn't stop getting colder, and she wasn't going to be able to handle it. Maybe she could stave off hypothermia, but her throat felt like a razor had been taken down its length, and sooner or later she was going to start coughing. She was going to get sick, and in conditions like this, it would be impressive if she came out of it. Hell, it was impressive she hadn't already gotten sick. Whatever luck had gotten her this far wouldn't last much longer.
That was it, then. This was going to kill her. Sunset had thought she had a chance, and she had since realized she was wrong. If she didn't freeze to death, she'd die coughing up her own lungs as her body gave out from illness. Her remaining lifetime, most likely, could be measured in weeks.
She should be scared by that thought. Maybe on some level she was - the anxiety that had been plaguing her leading up to this certainly would suggest as much. Right now, though, all Sunset felt was empty. Her entire body felt ten times heavier than it was meant to, and if she tried to rise, she wasn't sure she'd be able to.
And maybe that was okay. Maybe it was alright if she never got up out of this bed again. It's not like it would matter, in the end.
Sunset's thumb twitched. Her phone in her hand lit up, the screen illuminating her face providing the only colors and shapes in this black, featureless void of a room. For the seventh or eighth time that night, Sunset stared at Flash Sentry's contact information, gazing long at the image of his face. It wasn't a real photo of him; the image had been pulled straight out of the school yearbook because she'd never bothered to take an actual picture of him herself. Even when he was right in front of her, she never had time for him.
For the seventh or eighth time that night, Sunset considered calling him.
She didn't know what she'd say. She didn't know if there was even anything to say. What could she say, realistically? What was done was done. No combination of words would change that, only sugarcoat or distract from it. Even if all she said was that she wanted to hear his voice, and for whatever reason he was okay with that, it didn't matter. It wouldn't matter. Best case scenario, it would be awkward and uncomfortable. More realistic was that she'd find some way to make all this even worse, somehow.
Sunset's glassy, prickling eyes drifted to the corner of the screen. The delete button was right there. Her thumb moved ever so slightly, but drew no closer to it. Her eyes never left it.
She wouldn't remember his number without this contact. This was, in essence, her last link to him that existed in this world. If that was gone, that's it. There was nothing else, and she couldn't ask for it back. It'd be gone forever.
But that was fine, wasn't it? It was fine. It was good, even, because he'd lose that connection to her too, if he even knew he had it still. Then she wouldn't even have the option to talk to him, and she'd never be a burden in his life ever again. It'd be like waking up from a bad dream, any trace of the experience just meekly, gently fading away with the memory until it was completely gone. It would be like it had never even happened. She'd just...disappear.
Maybe that was for the best.
The shifting of light briefly tricked Sunset into thinking that the screen her gone out again, but then it started to vibrate in her hand. Rarity’s face smiled at her, and Sunset’s closed her eyes. Even when she pressed her other hand over her eyes, she could still see the light through her fingers.
For once, she didn’t want to answer. She almost didn’t.
Just before the call went to voicemail, Sunset - against her better judgement - hit the green phone icon beneath the picture and raised the phone to her ear. It took her several moments, but she finally found her voice. “Hello?”
“Hiiii darling~”
Sunset could never help the smile she got whenever Rarity greeted her, even the weak one that it was now. She always sounded so happy to see her. “Hey.”
There was a sound of something being crunched on Rarity’s end, like a chip or something, and the sound of a page being turned. “So I’ve been going through a lot of magazines lately looking for good Hearth’s Warming deals, and I found this lovely little number here- do you remember that place we went to at the mall a while ago? Bill’s and Quill’s?”
Sunset didn’t. Maybe she should’ve. “Vaguely.”
“We stopped there briefly- frankly I barely remember it myself, but apparently that outlet they have in the mall is closing down soon. There’s a big clearance sale going on across the entire store.” Another page rustled. “Most of what’s listed here is clothing, but I remember seeing all manner of bits and bobs in there - a rather eclectic stock if I’ve ever seen one.”
Sunset followed along in only the loosest sense. Even at her normal dialogue speed, it felt like Rarity was talking circles around her. “Yeah?”
“Indeed! It’s not entirely surprising they’re going under, really-“ Rarity paused to bite whatever snack she had. It sounded like chips or something. “After all, if they aren’t sure what store they’re meant to be running, how is anyone else meant to know? I’m still not certain what it’s supposed to be. A clothing store, I presume- or that’s how the magazine portrays it.” Another turn of a page. “Quirky little place…”
Space was left for Sunset to say something. She didn’t know what to say, so she ended up just waiting.
“I wanted to check it out sometime,” Rarity went on, “and I was just thinking earlier about how we haven’t gone out to do anything in a little while. Would you…” Her voice adopted a quality that Sunset had always associated with twirling a phone cord around her finger. “…perchance, be available this weekend? I wanted to get down there as soon as possible while the shelves are still stocked.”
“Oh…um.” Sunset tried to think, but the thoughts felt flat and difficult to adhere to. Getting up and going around in a crowded public space, frankly, sounded like the last thing she wanted to do right now. She didn’t want to do anything, but especially not that. “What day is it?”
“Today’s Thursday, darling.”
Sunset’s eyes slipped closed as a small wave of quiet despair rippled through her. Not only was the weekend very close, but there was still one school day left in the week. “…right. Um…”
How did she say ‘no?’ She didn't want to agree to something she didn’t want to do, but it was difficult to say which sounded worse to do: to agree to go somewhere in public when simply being seen sounded like a miserable experience, or to cause Rarity disappointment by refusing.
Realizing she had already taken too long to respond, Sunset started to quietly panic. Need to say words. “Um- I- I don’t know. I need um…”
“You sound a bit out of it, darling.” The note of concern in Rarity’s voice would sound dangerous to Sunset if her tone wasn’t so sympathetic. “Did I just wake you?”
“Yeah.” Sunset gave a single airy chuckle, smiling a bleak smile to herself. “I’m really tired.”
“You sound it, sweetheart.” There was a rustling of paper that preceded the sound of a magazine’s pages gently slapping shut. “I’m sorry to wake you. I thought this would be a safe time to call at.”
“It’s okay.” Sunset wasn’t sleepy, but keeping her eyes open was hard. She let them slide closed. “You didn’t know.”
“Do you want to talk about this tomorrow at school?”
Sunset swallowed. She winced immediately after as the feeling of a rock scraped down her throat hit her, forcing her to take a moment before she went on to reply. “I don’t know if I’ll be there tomorrow.”
“Oh.” There was a beat of pause, then some more open concern. “Are you alright, darling?”
Sunset could lie here, just to shake off the worry. She took in a breath to do so, but she found the prospect too tiring to follow through on, and the breath was abandoned as a defeated sigh. “I feel like shit right now.”
“How so?”
“Throat hurts. Just…generally feeling awful right now.”
“You’re not getting sick, are you, darling?”
Sunset nodded. No one would see, of course. “…well, I don’t know if it’s sick, I guess…it’s cold in my room a lot. Feels like I swallowed a knife.”
A sympathetic note came from Rarity’s end of the line. “Well, you don’t sound too bad yet. Perhaps a little hoarse…”
“It’s pronounced ‘pony.’”
It took a second to land, though the moment it did was marked by a snort that escaped Rarity. “Yes, well, you’re clearly not too ill to be a smartass, so I think you’re fine.”
Sunset smiled. It struggled to make its way onto her face, but it was a smile nonetheless.
A little time passed. After a while, Rarity asked, “Would you like me to let you rest, darling?”
Some part of her did. A not insignificant part of Sunset wanted to let the silence and darkness take her like the void in the yawning pit in her chest wanted and just disappear into it. Everything was so much work. Even speaking felt like exertion. She’d yet to open her eyes back up because it was too much effort.
On the other hand… “I don’t want to be alone right now.”
Rarity gave a loftily thoughtful noise. “I suppose I can manage something there. Normally my time is at quite the premium, but for you I’m willing to make an exception.” Rarity’s voice sounded smug, but there was a note of warmth in it that felt sincere. “Consider yourself lucky, my darling.”
Sunset huddled a little more in on herself, eyes opening just a little as she smiled in the dark. “I do.”
The amount of conversing that happened for the rest of the night was low. Sunset didn’t have much in her to talk, even as the night progressed, but Rarity didn’t seem to mind. She never seemed to mind the silence, but that was to be expected. She’d always had this way of saying a lot without using a single word.
Sunset didn’t move from where she laid. She spent the rest of the night with the phone to her ear, the pitch blackness of the dilapidated little dwelling parting only just enough to make her face visible in the otherwise featureless gloom. There was no other way her expression could have been made visible if not for that phone screen, just like how the small smile that clung to her lips wouldn’t have been possible if not for the light in a dark place she called Rarity.
Sunset had gotten quite accustomed to the soft beep of an outgoing call droning in her ear by now. She’d done more conversing over the phone in the last month than she had the last four years combined, and that’s counting when she was in active communication with a fairly substantial number of kids at Canterlot High.
School was an odd place to be making a phone call, though. Midway up the stairwell leading up to the roof was also an odd choice, if a somewhat understandable one - few eyes ever went in the direction of these stairs, much less up the dark stairway currently cold enough to see one’s breath, assuming one could indeed see. Particularly odd was that whereas the overwhelming majority of the calls she'd made lately had been to Rarity, this one was not. It had, in fact, been a very long time since she'd made the call she was currently making.
She'd been in this stairwell for minutes prior to hitting the call button, and had been psyching herself up for an hour or more before that. She'd had ample time to come to terms with what she was currently doing, and yet the tension in her was thick. Every note coming from the speaker was another stir of the energy in her, and more than once she considered simply hanging up if not for the fact that there was record of her making this call. Even if she backed off now, that wouldn't change. She was committed.
The shift in noise was subtle, but immediately detectable - Sunset could hear the instant the connection went through.
"Hey, it's Flash Sentry. Sorry I missed you. Drop the news and I'll get back to you. Peace." Beeeep.
For a split second, Sunset had thought that he had actually answered. She swallowed hard, the saliva in her mouth struggling to make it down her aching throat past her hammering heart, and she feebly began: "Hey."
...all the rehearsal was gone. All of it. She grasped for it, but it passed through her mental fingers like smoke. It took entirely too many seconds for her to find her voice again.
"Hey, um...it's Sunset." She cleared her throat quietly, willing her resolve to get back in place. Failing that, she at least managed to get to a regular speaking voice, though it still sounded a little pitiful to her own ears. "I uh...earlier today, there was, uh- I got a text about an autopayment that went through. Uh, for the phone, uh, phone bill." Sunset turned where she stood, instinctively going to pace if not for the wall directly in front of her, just as there was one to her back. "I uh...I just figured you should know about that. And I mean- I figure you gotta, y- I made a," she chuckled nervously, "a text about it before. Uh...twice. Actually. Um...I know haven't said anything about it lately, but I mean...like, you gotta know by now, right?"
Sunset took a few steps up the stairs, unable to completely suppress the need to find an outlet for the nervous energy rippling through her like an electric current. She took in a breath, trying to steel herself - she sounded pathetic. She needed to not be pathetic.
"Listen." She put one hand out, like she was speaking to someone in front of her in the dark. Despite saying that, what came from her was only the briefest sound as the start failed on her. It took another second or two to try again. "You don't need to do this. I'm-" Her voice cut out. She tried again. "You don't need to look after me anymore. Alright? I don't know if you ever should have, but you definitely shouldn't now. It's not- that's not where we're at. I've cost you enough."
It took a fair bit of work to keep her voice steady, though it paled in comparison to the amount of effort it took to not say more. Every bit of energy expended left her feeling physically smaller for it, and her voice shrank to match.
"...so...just turn off autopay. I don't want to get another text about this."
Sunset's lips moved a few moments after this, reaching for words she knew she couldn't afford to speak. Her thumb twitched, ending the call abruptly.
Silence fell. Sunset didn't move from where she stood, staring at the wall across from her that began to darken as most of the light leaking around the side of her head faded. After a few more seconds, her arm dropped to her side, the phone and her hand both slapping gently against her hip through her jacket. A few seconds later, the wall met her back with a soft impact.
She didn't know whether or not Flash was actually going to follow through with her request. This was the first time she'd dared to use her voice to speak it, but there'd been other requests before this one, spanning back several months now. Each time after that, the silence was punctuated by the occasional text noting that a payment for the phone was due, followed a week later by confirmation that the debt had been paid regardless. The number that she owed him continued to climb, and it had long since reached the point of being beyond her ability to repay...and yet she had no doubt in her mind that he'd hear nothing of repayment, monetary or otherwise.
Even now, he supported her. Even with her every misdeed and malintent stripped bare of any reasonable doubt, the lengths that she was willing to go to plain for all to see, he was still out there, wordlessly paying for her ability to use and benefit from the phone in her hand. In that way, it was like nothing had changed. He still had her back.
Did he not understand that he deserved better than this? Did he not get that she didn't want his money, much less deserve it? She had numbers for how much better off he would be if he'd just stop. It was statistically quantifiable how much she was weighing him down, yet he kept that string in place, heedless of it all. He still let her use him, despite her every wish for him to stop - her pleading, now, for him to stop.
And you know what? He probably wouldn't. This probably wouldn't be the end of it, knowing him.
Sunset rolled one shoulder, scraping it against her face to wipe away the wet streak on her cheek. She took in a breath through a slightly congested nose, and then kept taking it in till her lungs were full before finally releasing the air back out through her lips. She took another one, and then another. It wasn't until she was satisfied that any evidence of what had transpired here would not leave this stairwell that she allowed herself to take a step down the first of the stairs, followed in sequence by the rest of them.
As the light of the hallway shone down on her, the bell rang. Sunset Shimmer found herself swept up in a sea of bodies once again, feeling just a bit more lost in it than usual.
Not all days were created equal, and this was proving to be a rough one.
Sunset had struggled to focus ever since that phone call to Flash Sentry. The desire to avoid being seen had proven stronger than usual - Harmony help her if she saw him right now. She had taken to hiding in the girls’ bathroom and allowing the halls to empty before she made way to her locker between each class, more than happy with adding a handful of extra tardies to the pile in favor of that outcome.
As she sat on the toilet in the closed stall, listening to the sound of the warning chime in the hallway outside, Sunset wondered what they would even do if it came time for disciplinary action from the school, assuming it hadn’t come to that point already. In theory they’d just act on it, but that sounded slightly absurd to her. What were they going to do, demand she go to detention? After she’d enslaved the entire student body and every staff member in attendance, however briefly? They all remembered, they knew how it felt. She couldn’t do that anymore, but did they know that? Were they really going to risk crossing her after they’d seen a ten-foot-tall Sunset Shimmer demonically augmented, held aloft by a pair of blood-red leathery wings, devil’s laughter in her eyes and the power to rend their world in twain at her malformed fingertips?
Sunset’s gaze found one of the hands in her lap. She turned it over, palm up, bending each finger just a little as she looked them over, one at a time. Her nails were short, chewed down to the pink. Some of the flesh where the nail and skin met glowed an angry red where she had accidentally chewed them a little too far. Even the slightest amount of pressure made those spots sting.
She couldn’t remember the last time she’d done anything with these things. Doing your nails wasn’t all that different from doing your hooves; one just required a paint brush while the other required a tiny, pitiful little apparatus that toed the line between brush and needle, yet still felt entirely too large for the job it was supposedly designed for. No one had ever shown her how to use it correctly…not that it really mattered anymore. She couldn’t afford it, even if she wanted to.
Sunset’s eyes drifted to one side of the stall she was in as she listened. The last signs of activity out there had since passed, but she couldn’t remember hearing the actual bell. She eventually pulled her phone out of her pocket, and judging by the time, it had been several minutes since third period would have started. She couldn’t even pay enough attention to hear a loud bell going off in the hall not four feet to her left, apparently.
Maybe she should just go. She still wouldn’t allow herself to be seen in public with the friends she did have, so it’s not like she’d be missed. It’d probably be doing everyone here a favor anyway.
Sighing heavily to herself, Sunset stood off the toilet and lightly shoved past the stall door, then the door to the bathroom itself, stepping out into the hallway. She didn't have to think about which way to go to get to her locker, navigating the winding halls of Canterlot High more or less on autopilot. She had begun the journey back to her locker with purpose in her stride, though that purpose only lasted as far as the limits of the bathroom. Her hands found their way to her jacket's pockets as her steps became increasingly meandering until they threatened to stop completely.
Sunset did not recall the moment that she arrived to her destination. At some point she realized that she had, though her thoughts went no further than that. Seconds crawled by as she stood a foot away from the locker ostensibly designated as hers, hands in her pockets, staring at the green-painted metal door on its squeaking hinge as though waiting for something else to happen. Her weight shifted slowly to one leg as the weariness that had been creeping up on her all this time stood over her like a second shadow.
Going to class had no appeal. She just didn’t want to. Nothing about her state left her much good for it anyway, so Sunset was inclined to just not. There was no point in struggling needlessly for something that ultimately didn’t matter.
The problem was what she did instead. She could simply collect her things right now and step out that door, and no one could stop her…but where did she go? It was cold outside. Not painfully so, currently, but any amount of wind would change that, as even a stray breeze would cut through her current level of insulation like a knife. Even if she could handle the temperature, there was nothing else she had to occupy herself with. Most things she could think of cost money to do, of which she had none, and the only people she could think of who she’d want to spend time with were currently attending the classes she was considering skipping. She could just go home…but why? So she could sit in the dark by herself, cold and bored and breathing in dust? She might as well just stay here in that case, but she didn’t want to stay here, either. So where did she go?
It was in moments like these that Sunset realized how little she really had. She didn’t even have somewhere to stand, if not in the place that she was told to by the school that itself didn’t want to touch her. Nowhere to be, nothing to do…just a leaf on the tide, ending up where she ended up because she might as well, right? It’s not like there was an alternative, or a drive of her own to get her anywhere. She could want all she liked, but that didn’t get her any further from the flotsam of life that she was delicately drowning in.
What an empty existence. What a pathetic way to be.
Sunset took a step closer to her locker, though she did not reach for it. Halfway to it she turned in place, falling the rest of the way into it till her back lightly hit it, then slid the rest of way to the floor. The back of her head gently impacted the metal surface with a faint noise.
She didn’t think about what came next - her phone appeared in her hands, and she let it happen. It was either that or face the pit yawning wider in her chest with every passing moment, and she wasn’t brave enough for that.
You
Seconds passed. Sunset quite literally had nothing else to do but stare at the screen, so she did, waiting for a response that for all she knew wouldn’t come.
It didn’t, for several minutes. Sunset wasn’t keeping track of exactly how long it took, but at some point her gaze wandered, and when she looked back at her phone’s screen, she saw an ellipses cycling beneath the message she’d just sent. A tiny, barely detectable relief answered the sight, even before the message appeared.
Rarity
You
She didn’t wait nearly as long for a response this time.
Rarity
You
Rarity
Sunset scoffed to herself under her breath as she typed back. Million bit question…
You
Rarity
You
Rarity
Youto go
Rarity
That was certainly somewhere more pleasant than anything Sunset could think of in that moment.
You
Rarity
You
Sunset glanced at the time at the top of the screen. It wasn't nearly as far into the hour as she would like…there were worse places to wait, though.
Rarity
You
Rarity
Sunset chuckled quietly. She went to respond, though Rarity beat her to it.
Rarity
The smile faded, on that note. Hopefully she didn’t just get her best friend in trouble.
Classic me.
Sunset put her phone back into her pocket with a sigh. She glanced about once just to confirm that the halls were indeed empty before she went to stand, pushing up on her knees with a labored noise as her stiff muscles struggled to move the necessary mass in a hurry to get her vertical. Once up, she briefly considered how best to go about what to do next before deciding that she would indeed get her things out of her locker before she went to find Rarity's car. If she was already leaving the building, then it was as good an excuse as any to simply not return today.
If she was lucky, maybe she could convince Rarity to skip with her. It had been a little while since it had just been the two of them in person, and it would be very nice to have her all to herself for a few hours. Fleeting touches were nice and all, but nothing beat putting her arms around her and staying like that. It wouldn't be hard to convince her to stop somewhere so they could put themselves in a more comfortable orientation, she didn't think...
So distracted was Sunset at envisioning holding Rarity that she walked past the front entrance to CHS. She turned on her heel midway down the hall that led to the cafeteria and went straight for the front doors as she'd intended to.
The bite of the wind raked against her the moment the glass door opened enough to let it through. Sunset pulled herself more into her jacket as she quickly made her way over to the student parking spaces, currently fully illuminated by a sun that seemed to be getting scarcer by the day. That it shone at all was testament only to the thin spots in the overcast sky currently overseeing the latest blustery late autumn/early winter day.
The parking lot was rather full, but as ever, the odd turquoise color and distinct shape of Rarity’s station wagon made it stick out like a sore thumb once it came into view. It helped that it was running, too, making it both visually and audibly distinct.
Sunset wasted no time making her way to it once she saw it, though as she reached for the handle, a realization brought her to a halt.
This car was already running. Rarity was in class right now. No one else was around.
They not only modernized the guts of the vehicle in addition to completely restoring the chassis as it was designed in the 80s, but they even installed remote start into this automotive relic. The kitchen sink of car restoration was not missing from this picture.
Sunset didn’t know much about Rarity’s parents, but she decided then and there that her father was a madman.
Another frigid gust slapped some of Sunset’s hair into her face, which did well to encourage her to properly grasp the passenger door handle and climb into the slightly pre-heated vehicle. It wasn’t exactly balmy, but it was warmer inside than outside, and the shelter from the wind was more than welcome.
Freed from imminent winter’s whims, Sunset rolled her shoulders to shed her backpack, depositing it into the backseat with a gentle toss. She then sat back fully into the leather seat while stretching out her legs into the roomy space beneath the glove compartment, allowing them to be bathed in warm air. She then reached around the side of the seat in a practiced motion to incline the seat back to a more comfortable position, breathed in the familiar scent of the cabin mixed with traces of cigarette, and breathed out a sigh.
So many hours had been spent in this car by now. Sunset didn’t know how many exactly, but it was enough that the vehicle had begun to feel very familiar indeed. It wasn’t quite a second home yet, but at the rate things had been going between her and Rarity, it might just.
They needed to go on a road trip one of these days. Rarity hadn’t exactly kept her love of driving a secret, and Sunset knew she’d heartily agree to the idea, circumstances permitting. Maybe she’d float the thought when she got out of class - it felt bold to suggest Rarity wouldn’t have plans, given how busy that girl always seemed to be, but there were worse ways to spend winter break. Sunset knew she would enjoy it.
If I live that long.
Sunset’s eyes slid closed. Some of the light in her thoughts drained away as the heaviness she’d nearly left behind gently straddled her where she laid.
…yeah. If she lived that long.
Sunset decided that she didn't want to think anymore. Though her thoughts never truly stilled, she did her best to squelch them as best she could by finding specific points in the car to stare at as time crawled by as its own pace. It was a strategy she often used for letting time go by with nothing to do, and to some extent to get to sleep. It was easier when she was actually relaxed, but this would do for now.
It wasn't clear to Sunset how much time passed. At some point, however, the front doors to the school opened up, and Sunset glanced up at the movement to see Rarity all bundled up in her pea coat, making her way over to the parking lot and up the lane towards her. As soon as Rarity got close enough to the car to see into the windshield, she smiled and waved. Sunset smiled back, a little. It wasn't quite relief she felt, but it wasn't far off from it, either.
The wind was visibly blowing Rarity about just as much as it had blown against Sunset on the way over, and she wasted no time in getting to the driver's side door and tugging it open to duck inside. "Blustery as all hell," she huffed.
Sunset nodded with a tired smile as the door slammed lightly. "That's why I didn't go to the roof."
"You wouldn't be up there for long, I don't imagine! I'd be scraping you off the sidewalk."
Sunset shrugged. "Eh...it'd be easier to stick me in the trunk like that."
"Perhaps so, but I like you in one piece."
Sunset shrugged again, sighing lightly. Some of the weight compressed on her chest a little bit more. "It's fine. I don't really feel like I'm in one piece these days anyway."
The key clicked gently as it was put in the ignition, though that was as far as it got. Rarity turned in her seat towards Sunset, sympathy and care written all over her expression, and raised one hand, gesturing 'come hither' to her with one finger.
It took Sunset a moment to respond, only really moving when Rarity began to lean forward over the divider between them. As their faces grew nearer, Rarity placed a hand on either of Sunset's cheeks and leaned closer still until her lips found her forehead. Sunset's eyes slipped closed for the few seconds that it lasted, and the kiss concluded with the softest little smack of parting lips. "You know you mean the world to me, right?"
Sunset swallowed lightly, eyes remaining closed as she gave a small nod in response. Rarity's hands were warm, and soft. Her touch always felt perfect.
Rarity's hand softly stroked one cheek. A second forehead kiss came, just as soft and being placed in the same spot as the first, though for much longer this time. After a long, warm silence that was wholly unchallenged, Rarity withdrew her lips noiselessly from Sunset's forehead. A few seconds later, Sunset's eyes opened again, which had no trouble at all finding Rarity's small yet warm smile. "Is there anywhere you'd like to go right now, sweetheart?"
Sunset...didn't really consider the question all that much. She shrugged a bit, voice low and quiet as she replied, "I don't really care."
"Well, lucky you, then." Rarity flashed a brighter smile, then sat back again, taking the warmth of her hands with her as she applied them to the task of starting the car. "I don't much mind where we go any more than you."
Sunset didn’t say anything. She sat back in her seat, cheeks still carrying traces of warmth that Rarity's hands had left there. She kept sitting back until she slumped in the seat, head rolling sideways till she was able to look out through the passenger door window.
For a little while, nothing was said, sans the one-note commentary provided by the station wagon's now active motor. Sunset felt a little better with Rarity here, but she still felt colorless. She also didn't feel super talkative.
“I think it might be my favorite way to drive. No destination in mind except...well, forward."
There was a pause, though Sunset didn't fill it.
The silence did little to deter Rarity. "There’s something so liberating about it, you know? I could decide I want to go to the mall right now, and you know what? I’d just go to the mall. And halfway there I could decide, no actually, you know what sounds nice? Getting my nails done. It’s been an age and a day since I had them done professionally, may as well do it now while I have the chance!” One hand left the wheel as she gesticulated with that arm. “Because why not, right? And then I could be pulling into the parking space in front of the salon and go, no, actually–“ she shifted lanes, seemingly for no other reason than emphasizing her point, “–I think I’d rather get something to eat first. And then I go do that. Because to hell with it, let’s go. I’ve got the choice, and I’m taking it!” She shifted lanes again, putting the car back where it was. “For no other reason than because I can.”
Sunset didn’t outwardly react. Her eyes were on the passing sidewalk a few yards to her right through the window, but she listened.
“Driving was my first real freedom.” Rarity’s voice picked up a reminiscing quality. “The world opened up to me with a license. I could get in the car, and just…go. Just go, in a straight line, as far as and as long as I like, and no one could stop me.” She looked out at the open road ahead of them like her destiny was out there somewhere. “First time in my life I could decide where I wanted to be, and just…do it. If the road leads to it, I can just be there. Whenever I want.”
Sunset wasn’t sure where the question came from, but she asked it: “Ever left the country?”
“No.” The car came to a stop at a stoplight as traffic buzzed by in front of them. “Not yet, anyway.”
"Sounds like you wanna."
"Oh, certainly. But..." Rarity let out a wistful sigh at this, followed by a contemplative silence. “I fantasize more than I plan, I suppose. I don't know how far I'd go if I was given the chance. Some days the edge of the known world sounds nice, but other days…” She pressed her lips together as she bobbed her head this way and that. “I don’t know. Sometimes I want to stay home.” The car nudged forward at the green light, putting them on the highway. “Sit in my pajamas in bed, watch television…”
“Talk on the phone.”
“Talk on the phone,” Rarity mirrored, a small grin gracing her lips. “Keep talking on the phone…lose track of time…”
“Take the pajamas off…”
Rarity nodded along, smiling widening. “Maybe just don’t change into anything else…”
“Photo document it…” Sunset was still looking out the window, but she had since grown a smile of her own. “Trade notes with the weirdo on the line with you…”
“Psh, weirdo .” Rarity flippantly waved a hand. “As though studying is so strange.”
“Right, studying,” Sunset chuckled. “That’s what that is.”
“Quite!” The peppy nonchalance was rather convincing-sounding if it was coming from anyone but Rarity in that moment. “It’s simply studying.”
“Studying human anatomy.”
“Precisely. Nothing odd about that.”
“Nothing at all.”
“Not a thing.”
“Definitely not the horniest shit ever.”
“Purely professional."
“Very. Very professional.”
“Quite. We’re professionals, after all.”
“Oh yeah, totally. Very professional.”
“Absolutely. We should be paid for this kind of professionalism, really.”
Sunset started to respond, but found only chuckles escaping her throat where words would go. She shook her head as Rarity giggled along with her, watching the world streak by out the window to the tune of the hum of the road.
A silence fell, comfortable as it often was. Sunset had often felt warmth after their little exchanges, but something about it felt particularly fulfilling this time, like she’d needed this. She had needed this.
Rarity focused on driving for a little while more, though eventually she piped up again: “…perhaps an odd question, but…did those pictures teach you anything?”
“Uh...” Sunset chuckled once. “That I want to sleep with you?”
“Not like that,” Rarity scolded with a playful slap to Sunset’s shoulder. “I meant like, human biology. Call it-“ Her voice shrank a little. “Well no, it is presumptuous. I don’t know your experiences.”
“Uhh…” Sunset sat back in her seat as her eyes searched the ceiling over her head. “I have seen humans without clothes on, just not…y’know…people I know. For the most part.”
There wasn’t a verbal response, but the silence felt questioning, to Sunset.
She debated whether she should share or not, then rolled her eyes and admitted, “Just one guy. Naked, I mean. In-person. Everything else is bits and pieces. Mostly locker rooms, but that’s…y’know,” she rolled her wrist, “tame. The rest is the internet’s fault. I’ve done my share of research.”
“…huh.”
“Yeah.” A beat. “Oversharing?”
“Oh, um-“ Rarity tripped over her words for a moment. “I’d- no, it’s more- more what you’re comfortable with, is my- my, um, concern.”
Sunset shrugged and waved a hand in a show of indifference. “I don’t give a shit. I mean, I didn’t even wear clothes till I came here, and I probably wouldn’t at all if humans weren’t scared of nudity and also bald.”
A pfff burst out of Rarity’s throat.
“I’m serious!” Sunset gestured sharply down at herself like it was absurd, heedless of the giggles spilling from Rarity. “Do you know how many times in my life I’ve thought to myself, ‘I could really use a jacket’ before I came here? None! Zero! Every one of you is chronically balding, and it is the most jank baldness I’ve ever seen! Everything but the head and groin? Seriously? Even you guys think it’s weird by the way you get about it!”
It took Rarity a few seconds before she could push past her own giggling to respond properly. “In our defense,” she managed, raising one finger. “In our defense, the need to cover up opens up a world of options for self-expression. Fashion is a cornerstone of human culture the world over.”
Sunset huffed and crossed her arms over her chest. “Yeah well, it’s not going to keep me from complaining about it.”
“Well tell you what: you keep complaining, and I’ll enjoy how my future career has legs.”
“Yeah, bald legs.”
“You have bald legs!”
Sunset let out an amused scoff. “I wish. That would have saved me quite the lecture about shaving when I was learning human shit.”
Rarity glanced at the side mirror out the window, then toggled the blinker as she switched lanes. “At least you don’t have full-on fur to shave. Can you imagine how long that would take?”
“Yes: zero seconds, cuz I’m not a psychopath.” Sunset responded to Rarity’s giggling by doubling down on her affronted look. “Shave my f- why would a pony shave their fur off, Rarity? That’s unhinged.”
Rarity sputtered a response as she gestured vaguely with one hand in her defense. “Well I- I’m- was just saying what if- it’s fur, that would take longer!”
“Well if I had fur, I’d be a pony! That’s weird!”
“Yes but if you- it’s m- hush!”
“That’s weird, Rarity! Why you being so weird about it?”
“Oh please, this is coming from you? I don’t even want to hear it, miss–“ She took on a dopey-sounding voice as she cheerfully went, “‘How do you do, fellow human?’”
“Hey!” Sunset laughed, putting her hands up. “I’m literally an alien! If anyone’s allowed to do that, it’s me, alright?”
“Nope~ Sorry darling, your grace period has elapsed. I’m afraid there’s no more ‘fellow human’ tolerance to spare for you anymore.”
Sunset ‘deflated,’ looking down at her lap. “Damn…can’t believe they revoked my human visa.”
“Truly a travesty~ But alas! ‘Tis what you get for being a furry.”
The ’a’ in that sentence did not register immediately for Sunset. As she turned her head to respond, she met the gaze of an exceptionally smug-looking Rarity smirking at her, and the latter half of the double entendre landed. “…oh, fuck you.”
Rarity then exploded into laughter. Sunset repeated her statement several times, which did little to stop Rarity’s laughter. Or her own, for that matter.
For a while, the car was filled with the duo’s combined cackling. Even after the joke had run its course, the sound of the other’s lingering giggling would prompt the other to begin doing so, which made the other start over as well, resulting in constant on-off back-and-forth waves of giggles with minimal provocation.
After minutes spent like that, Sunset finally half-laughed, “Okay, where the hell are we going?”
Rarity took a breath or two to force down the giggles. “Um…” She glanced about either side of the road, pushing aside the strands of hair that had fallen forward into her eyes with one finger as she took stock of their surroundings. “I,” she proclaimed, “haven’t the foggiest idea.”
“Welp.” Sunset started chuckling, which threatened to start the whole process over again. “Are we even still in town?”
“Mmmmmnope!”
Sunset threw up her hands, then let them fall back into her lap with a pair of soft off-sync slaps. “We’re getting lunch in Cloudsdale, apparently.”
“Apparently!” Rarity chuckled once, then went quiet for a few moments before more confidently asserting, “You know what, yes, let’s do that. Have you ever been to Cloudsdale, darling?”
It took Sunset a few moments to consider this. She definitely hadn’t in this world, but she couldn’t think of a time she’d ever been to Cloudsdale back home, either. Cloud cities were typically only accessible to non-pegasi on special occasions, and they were all ones she’d never had the chance to partake in. “No, I haven’t.”
“Feel like exploring with me?”
Sunset knew that it wasn’t the same Cloudsdale as the one back in Equestria, but even still, the thought of having a chance to see what had always been nothing more than a spot on the horizon ignited a small foalish spark of excitement in her heart. The smile on her lips was involuntary as she replied, “That’d be really cool.”
This was met with a triumphant smile from Rarity, who proclaimed, “Marvelous! Cloudsdale ho!”
Sunset waited precisely one second, then whipped her head around at Rarity. “Whatchu just call me?”
“Th- oh shut up.”
Suffice it to say that there'd be plenty of laughter between those two that afternoon. There always was.
The two arrived in Cloudsdale about half an hour later. They spent most of the time driving through its many streets, taking in the sights and poking their heads into various shops and stores they found along the way, not really shopping so much as taking it in along with the rest of the city. They stopped near a park at one point to smoke outside of its outskirts, during which they narrowly avoided Rarity getting a ticket for where she’d parked the car.
It was definitely no cloud city, but it was an adventure for Sunset all the same. The two of them were so caught up in the experience of exploring Cloudsdale that they completely lost track of the time. By the time either of them remembered their original plan of lunch, it was already dark out. They instead got dinner at a place neither of them remembered the name of, only that they were served by a girl named Tiny Snow who was very sweet and that they both liked the name of.
For reasons Rarity refused to elaborate on, Sunset was also pulled into a toy store and not allowed to exit until she had picked something she wanted. She settled on a small rainbow-colored beanie baby turtle with tiny black eyes and a bitty U-shaped smile, altogether forming a colorful, happy little fellow just big enough to sit in the palm of Sunset’s hand. The tag on his leg said ”Rainbow Rupert.” He rode on Sunset’s shoulder all the way home.
It was a good day.
Canterlot High School was remarkable in a few ways compared to other schools in the district, but the ways in which it was not remarkable had always served Sunset best.
Security was not a high priority for the school, simply because it had never needed to be. It had a security staff and two or three guards that were on payroll, but the city of Canterlot had a particularly low crime rate compared to anywhere else around it, and it had remained that way for quite some time. As a consequence, safety measures sometimes were allowed to go slack, and when they did, there were seldom repercussions for it.
Once she’d become established in this world and started to get more ambitious, Sunset Shimmer went to great lengths to map out as many weaknesses in CHS’s security as she could get away with, sniffing out the ways that she could abuse the school’s sloth for her own benefit.
One of the most glaring security holes she’d found was the door to the roof, which had a busted mechanism that prevented the lock from latching at all. You couldn’t arm the security system to the school if any of the external doors weren’t locked, but it was also a pain in the ass for the maintenance team to fix. Rather than go to all the trouble of repairing the old door, the school’s security staff had plucked the sensor from it and removed that doorway from the alarm network, seeing as it was unlikely anyone would get in from the rooftop anyway. Of course, it also meant that there was a blind spot on the roof for people to linger up there after hours, but that was preventable by simply giving the roof an inspection before closing…which no one did. No one had been caught up there in many years, so no one checked it, and because no one checked it, no one got caught up there, thus leaving the door wide open for someone to take advantage of it.
Exploitation had some issues, of course. The most obvious problem was that the roof was open to the elements, which wasn’t great if it was anything but a clear summer’s night. Beyond that, there were still cameras inside the building, which were motion-activated. Sure, you could slip into the halls while sneaking after hours on the roof, but it was basically impossible to get into the building without showing up on surveillance once the school was properly closed. School staff was not so lax as to not pay attention to the red exclamation marks on the security terminal when those cameras picked up activity.
With a combination of snooping and careful questioning, Sunset had found that there was a window of about twenty to thirty minutes where one could get from the roof to somewhere else in the school before security started to lock the place up properly. This was often necessary, if you needed to stay there overnight for some reason, which Sunset sometimes did when she was still actively scheming. There were a couple options available for this, each of which had their own pros and cons, though one had proven both reliable and particularly entertaining to exploit.
Much like her princess counterpart, Principal Celestia had a thing about preserving books. There was a legacy section in the farthest corner of the expansive CHS library that had all the textbooks that normally went out of date, but which the school refused to get rid of at the principal’s behest, either for “just in case” situations or otherwise just not wanting to throw out perfectly serviceable literature that no one was using.
This was fine and all, but there were only so many shelves in the library, and over the years, the number of books had since outgrown the number of shelf spaces they could be put on by a substantial margin. The result was a large pile of old books which no one was allowed to throw out and which no one had a good place to put them. A tarp had been thrown over them to prevent dust buildup, and in lieu of other options, there they sat, untouched by students and generally ignored by staff. Because it was ignored by staff, there was nothing stopping someone from going in and rearranging the book piles to one’s liking, since it wasn’t likely to get messed with any time soon.
Thus, Sunset had simply put the books together in an arrangement like the walls of a fortress, with a space in the center big enough for someone to fit into if they laid down. The number of books meant that she actually had a fair bit of space to work with, and she had no trouble creating enough room to stretch out to her full body’s length on the floor, plus room to roll around a little without bumping into anything. All you had to do was lift the tarp, move a few rows out of the way, crawl inside, and seal yourself back in for good measure. With the tarp pulled taut such that it looked flat on top, the entire structure looked like a solid mass, giving away nothing of the stowaway currently lounging inside.
Something about creating a book fort as a means of bypassing campus security was very funny to Sunset. She viewed it as being one step removed from sneaking past guards using an overturned cardboard box. The book fort itself was also a throwback to her foalhood, bringing back memories of creating similar structures to hide away in and chow down on her stolen foodstuffs like a bandit in her hideout. What really put a cherry on the nostalgia cake was the pillow and sheet she’d smuggled in there combined with the carpet beneath her, all of which did work to really sell the “sleepover in the living room” experience. All that was missing was the crackle and glow of a fireplace on the other side of her fortifications and the gentle tick of a grandfather clock across the room. Even without these things, and in spite of it being some of the darkest days of her life, Sunset couldn’t help but feel a little like a filly again.
It’s funny, the way life conspires to take you home, sometimes. Even when you can never go back, it still tries.
The light from the phone that had slipped out of her hand illuminated the inside of her pitch-black fortress. Sunset’s eyes found it, though she didn’t move until the screen dimmed again, which is where she nudged her hand to the side to tilt the phone enough that she could read the preview.
Fluttershy
Sunset’s eyes flicked to the top of the screen. 11:32 PM.
She spent a few seconds laying there like that, just looking at the phone. After the screen went dark, she sighed and thumbed the home button, then opened the text properly to respond.
You
Fluttershy
Sunset couldn’t help but emit a breath of a chuckle - both at that response and how it was almost instantaneous.
You
Fluttershy
Sunset barely had time to get halfway through a response before an image file was sent her way.
Sure enough, the picture was taken of Fluttershy lying on her bed in a fuzzy-looking green onesie, lit only by her lamp on her nightstand out of frame. She was visible only from the waist up where the covers had been peeled back, and only half of that half was visible past the nearly spherical gray bundle of fur of a feline variety nestled into her side under her arm, looking quite pleased with its position.
You
Fluttershy
You
An ellipses cycled back and forth at the bottom of the screen, then stopped. Sunset smirked at what she could only assume was Fluttershy dropping her phone.
You
Fluttershy
That made Sunset properly chuckle.
You
Fluttershy
///>
You
Fluttershy
You
Fluttershy
.<‘
Her and her emojis.
Sunset wasn’t sure how to continue with this particular line of dialogue, as amusing as it was. She waited a minute or so to see if there was more, then went on.
You
Fluttershy
You
Fluttershy
You
Fluttershy
Sunset glanced down at the floor she was lying on. She’d wrapped some of the sheet she was using beneath herself and had even shed her jacket to use as additional padding, though neither had done much to detract from how the floor was the floor. The carpet was permissible for naps during the day, but night was a different beast.
You
Fluttershy
Sunset hesitated, considering how best to word it without lying. She settled with:
You
There, that wasn’t lying. She never said the room was in the same building.
Fluttershy
Damn it.
You
Fluttershy
You
Fluttershy
You
Now stop asking about it.
Fluttershy
...that was answerable truthfully, so it wasn't so bad.
You
Fluttershy
Sunset swallowed lightly. The simple action made her wince - it was like swallowing a razor.
You
Fluttershy
Sunset pursed her lips together as she read this over.
On the one hand, that would be…so nice. It would be so nice to sleep in an actual house, with actual heating, where she was actually welcome and where she didn’t have to sneak around and worry about things like being caught, or deal with shitty living conditions. She’d have access to food as well, assuming they let her share their food…and they would, right? Surely they would. It was Fluttershy, surely she could convince her to help with that at least a little bit. Even without that, it was still a massive step up from what she had now, and that was tempting enough on its own.
The problem was that it wouldn’t last. She couldn’t stay with Fluttershy’s family forever - not without it looking weird and inviting some questions she couldn’t afford to answer. It’s not like her situation would have improved much by the time she had to leave again, either. After all, how could it? It’s not like she could ever afford her own place, what with never being eligible for a job. What was she going to do, leapfrog her way between her friends’ homes and hope none of them ever put two and two together? She didn’t have enough of those right now anyway, unless she wanted to suck up to the other Rainbooms, which currently she did not.
Was it even worth engaging with this? It would be so nice, but it would also be troublesome, and more than a little bit. It was getting hard enough to keep this act up even while she had the benefit of distance between herself and others, nevermind if she was bunking with someone. What was she going to do if she got asked something she couldn’t answer and couldn’t just lie her way out of it when the other person was right there in the same house as her? Hell, what was she going to do if that happened now?
Sunset’s head fell forward, coming to rest on her palm as she squeezed her forehead with one hand. Her jaw clenched and unclenched a few times, a strained sigh working its way out her throat. Her chest felt like a fist had clenched over it. The muscles were so tight that it was starting to ache.
What did she even say here? She had been staring at her phone this whole time, but only now did Sunset start to wrack her brain for a response.
You
Fluttershy
A bitter scoff burst out of Sunset’s throat as she typed a response.
You
Fluttershy
Sunset’s thumbs twitched for her phone’s keypad, though she stopped them. After a few more seconds of feeling her pulse start to quicken and her heartbeat start to register more in her chest, she gave into her feelings.
You
Fluttershy
Youthink not?
Fluttershy
YouI should be dead
The response didn’t come immediately, or even especially quickly. Sunset stared at the screen all the while, grip on her phone tight as her heart thudded in her chest at a quickened pace.
Fluttershy
You
Sunset had typed out the response before she ever thought about it. Afterwards she was left laying there, heart hammering, staring at that line of text that barely felt like she’d typed it, slowly trying to wrap her head around the words despite being the one responsible for them.
What did you do, in this situation? Can you really just go on with your days after having gone through something like this? Was there something that needed to be done first? Some kind of understanding reached? Should you be angry? Sad? Hateful? Happy? Was there anything to feel about it? Which was better? Which was worse? How did you make it make sense?
She didn’t know. It had been months since the Fall Formal, and Sunset Shimmer still didn’t know what to do with herself.
Fluttershy
Sunset didn’t realize she was staring at the text until the screen went dark from inactivity. She did it one better by holding down the power button until the phone turned off, then dropped it somewhere in the darkness beside her. She then turned herself over where she lay, gruffly pulled the sheet over herself, and willed the night to take her.
As she had so many mornings before this one, Sunset Shimmer woke up in pain.
Something about sleeping on the floor tended to be rather unforgiving to human anatomy, and Sunset’s anatomy in particular was feeling particularly taxed. Her throat hurt especially bad this morning, and she felt a cough coming on that it took a fair bit of work to stifle as she was still gathering her bearings. Her muscles were already sore from constant exposure to the cold, her back ached something fierce, and she was thirsty enough that it was difficult to separate her tongue from the roof of her mouth. In addition to this, she had gotten four hours of sleep at the most, so there was also the haze and general bleariness of exhaustion to have to wade through on top of aching across more or less every inch of her body, both inside and out.
Simply getting up proved to be uniquely difficult. Any amount of contortion of her spine resulted in stabs of some of the worst back pain Sunset had ever felt in her life. When she had first tried to sit up, the pain had all but physically taken the air out of her lungs - which was good, because if she could breath, she probably would have screamed.
When she had the thought that she’d somehow injured herself and might be unable to get up, the entire experience went from upsetting to terrifying. The entire time she was dealing with that, Sunset was in total darkness, surrounded on all sides by walls of books that felt increasingly claustrophobic as her panic grew. To make matters worse, she had to be careful not to knock out the walls of books around her, or else they might collapse on her - not exactly life threatening, given the number of them the walls were made up of and how the ceiling was just a tarp, but in the moment it felt like a danger all the same. In case all of that wasn’t scary enough, just to make it that extra little bit scarier, she also knew throughout the entire ordeal that there wasn’t going to be anyone outside this hiding spot to help her if she needed it.
After a lot of painful struggle, Sunset did manage to sit upright, though it wasn’t clear in her mind what played a bigger role in it: the gradual loosening of her back muscles caused by her constant writhing, or the extra strength and pain tolerance from the panic-induced adrenaline surge.
There were a lot of reasons why sleeping in the library wasn’t a sustainable option, but after the scare she’d received that morning, Sunset had no intention of ever trying it again unless her life depended on it.
She woke up at around 5 AM that morning…or so she assumed, at least. She was too busy freaking out and then recovering to keep track of time, but by the time she’d calmed down a little, the library had opened and Sunset was able to emerge from her book fort. The hardest part was standing upright; she was surprised Cheerilee didn’t hear the amount of grunting and groaning she was emitting from the strain of it. After that, most of the early morning was spent feebly trying to limber up, or else trying to find some position she could sit in that would hurt marginally less than others. If there was such a position available to her, she’d yet to find it.
You know what would have helped a lot in that situation? A nice relaxing hot shower.
You know what would have helped even more in that situation? The door to either of the locker rooms being unlocked. Y’know, like they had been every morning for the last astrological epoch right up until Sunset really, really needed access to those locker rooms.
Can't have that, though. That would fall under the umbrella of "nice things," and that's just not allowed. Especially not if your name's Sunset Shimmer.
Just as Sunset was considering how today was even going to work, her phone vibrated. Memory of the previous night made her slightly apprehensive to check it, but she did.
Rarity
Sunset released the small breath she didn’t realize she was holding.
You
Rarity
So much for relief.
You
Rarity
Sunset couldn’t hold back the eye roll. Immediately tattled on herself. Smooth.
You
Rarity
Sunset’s thumbs hovered above the touchscreen keyboard. She only considered her response for a few moments before she shook her head and sighed, then started typing.
You
Rarity
No sooner did Sunset finish reading did the phone screen suddenly go black. No button she pushed did anything except for the power button, which made the screen change to a faint lightning bolt beside an empty battery. She never charged her phone that morning.
Sunset took in a slow breath through her nose, then released it as a controlled stream of air through the O of her lips. She carefully put the phone back into her pocket and muttered evenly to herself, “Just gonna go see Rarity. Just gonna go to the band room, and go see Rarity. It’s fine.”
It’s fine. This was fine. Today was absolutely, totally fine. It’d be fine.
It wasn’t an especially long walk from the library’s seating area to the band room, though it felt like it took a lot longer to travel the distance with her stiff, hobbling gait. Every other step was accompanied by some grimace or small noise of discomfort, and her one shoulder was so stiff that she had to carry her backpack expressly on the other one. At least there were barely any students in the halls this early. Band class wasn’t until third period at the earliest, so combine that with the time of day and there were very few people to dodge the gaze of…which was good, because Sunset wouldn’t be dodging much of anything in this state.
At least the cough was under control. For now.
Normally the classroom itself was locked at this hour, and upon testing the handle, Sunset confirmed this. The handle to the students’ instrument storage room, however, was much more cooperative.
There was little to see in the storage room. What was there was on the tin: rows and rows of cubbies on shelves of various different sizes to fit every instrument the school could imagine students keeping here, each with a metal bar door and padlock to keep instruments secure.
It also had Rarity in it, which was a weird addition but a very welcome one. Said girl perked at the sound of the door opening and, upon seeing Sunset, flashed a warm smile her way. “Hi darling~”
Sunset returned the smile, though she refrained from speaking until the door closed behind her. Whatever she was about to say was lost as she found herself distracted by the small wooden wedge that Rarity pulled out of her purse, looking like it had been abducted out of a child’s block set. Before she could ask, Rarity crossed the room and dropped the block on the floor in front of the doorway, then guided it narrow-end first with her foot to the gap beneath the door, where she gave it a light kick to secure it in place. A few testing nudges confirmed it wasn’t going anywhere by accident.
Rarity scrutinized her work for only a moment longer before she gave it a satisfied nod, then directed her attention towards Sunset. She noted the confused expression and answered it with a questioning if amused look. “What? Do you like being walked in on?”
Sunset’s lips mouthed some unspoken question, but after a few moments she decided that she was far too strung-out and low on sleep to commit brainpower to this. “S- sure.”
Rarity giggled that musical little giggle of hers before opening her arms invitingly. “Now come here, sweetheart.”
That was much more up Sunset’s ability to comprehend, and she wasted no time closing the distance to put her arms around Rarity. Rarity, in turn, slipped her arms around Sunset’s midsection, letting her head fall forward to settle in the crook of Sunset’s neck.
“There we go,” Sunset murmured, head coming to rest against Rarity’s. She took in a deep breath, then released it as a sigh, trading some of the tension of this rocky morning for the happy little spell that Rarity’s embrace always carried with it. “I needed this.”
Rarity let out a soft contented note as she closed her eyes. “It’s nice, isn’t it?”
Sunset nodded a little, cheek rubbing against the top of Rarity’s head as she did so. Her violet hair was always as soft as it was vibrant. She didn’t have many words, so she conserved her focus and let herself be lost in the moment.
Things always seemed so much simpler when it was just her and Rarity. She could stop thinking about everything else going on and just…enjoy her. Just enjoy the touches, and the feeling of Rarity’s breath where it occasionally wafted over the skin of her neck, and the warmth that spread between them the longer they held one another, both physically and spiritually. Moments like these were some of the only things Sunset had left where she could feel truly at peace.
For a while, that’s all they did. Time passed, but how much wasn’t important, nor was it considered. Sunset did maneuver them back a little so that they could lean against the wall and take some of the work off her aching back to hold them up, but that was the extent of it. Everything else was just gentle touches, feeling each other breathe, and soaking in the intimate silence.
At some point during the embrace - Sunset wasn’t sure how or when it happened - Rarity’s hand ended up on the left shoulder, just beneath her jacket. The only reason Sunset noticed this happening was because she suddenly felt the cool end of Rarity’s finger touching bare skin where the shirt should be. She looked down at the unexpected feeling and saw Rarity looking disapprovingly at the same thing Sunset was: a hole in the weathered burgundy fabric, just large enough to fit the width of the finger currently probing it.
Sunset grunted quietly. “Old shirt.”
“Retirement age, methinks.” Rarity retracted her finger as she inspected the shirt with a quiet disdain. She opened Sunset’s jacket a little to see more of it, looking it over with an appraising kind of critical eye a mother might give a girl that her son had brought home. “We really need to get you some better clothes.”
Sunset just shrugged. Her arms had slipped from where they had been around her to hanging loosely around her waist. “It does the job.”
“But it looks ratty!” Rarity whined. “You can’t just go around wearing tattered old rags because it ‘does the job.’ You need nice clothes! Something nice and pretty and well-made.”
“So…like you.”
This earned a swat to Sunset’s shoulder through her jacket. “Don’t distract me with flattery,” Rarity chided, though it was undermined by her smile she couldn’t manage to force down. ”And get that smirk off your face till I’m done scolding you.”
“Sorry,” Sunset chuckled, failing to both stop grinning and sound even slightly remorseful. “It’s so hard not to smile around you, though. I can’t help myself.”
”Quiddit.” Rarity’s gaze fell from Sunset’s face to her torso as she shifted in place, that same smile on her face. “You’re going to make me blush.”
“Wouldn’t want that, now would we?”
“Insufferable.” Rarity leaned forward till she had her full weight gently leaning into Sunset again, her head coming to rest on Sunset’s shoulder. “It’s a wonder why I put up with you most days.”
Without hesitating, Sunset nonchalantly replied, “Cuz I’m hot.”
A snort of a laugh burst out of Rarity’s throat at this. “Well it certainly doesn’t hurt, I’ll give you that.”
Sunset chuckled along, head leaning against Rarity’s like before. As she fell silent again, she took in a breath and let it out as another soft sigh, breathing out another layer of her woes along with it.
They’d come a long way from how this all started. For the longest time they would almost hide their affection from each other, like acknowledging it would make it stop. This was…nice. To say the least.
“…I did want to talk to you about something, though.”
It took Rarity saying that for Sunset to remember that she had indeed been summoned here for a purpose, and said purpose was not to cuddle in the room they’d locked themselves in. She was a bit reluctant to let go of the atmosphere they’d created, but Sunset nonetheless lifted her head off Rarity’s to look at her a little more properly. “What’s up?”
Rarity quit leaning on Sunset, pulling away ever so slightly, though not enough so that Sunset’s arms slipped free of her waist where they’d been resting. She started to look a little shy as she played with a lock of hair, her cerulean eyes momentarily having trouble looking squarely at Sunset. “So,” she began, slowly, “I’ve been doing some thinking lately…”
Sunset nodded along. She wasn’t entirely conscious of the assuring circle her one hand traced along Rarity’s back. “What about?”
“Us.”
Sunset continued nodding along. “Us like, you and me, or us like…” The loose hold around Rarity’s waist tightened just a hair, for the sake of emphasis. “Us?”
Rarity started replying, though the words never quite reached her lips and she let the breath back out in a sheepish chuckle. The purple lock continued to twirl around her finger, over and over, slowly. “Us. Like…you know.”
“What we’ve got going on.”
Rarity nodded. Her eyes left her hair to peer up past her bangs at Sunset. The moment her eyes met Sunset’s, she recoiled from the gaze skittishly and avoided it despite the smile. “...I guess it is fair to say that we have something going on, isn’t it?”
“Well …” Sunset meant to roll her shoulders in an easygoing shrug, though she only managed to bring them up a bit before they hurt too much to move. The tone would have to communicate the rest. “I don’t think it’s gotta be something, but it does feel like…more. More than it was. Y’know?”
Softly, Rarity murmured, “It’s nice.”
“It is.” Sunset’s arms wrapped around Rarity’s middle a little more securely. “I really like it.”
“Me too.”
“I think about you a lot.” A beat. “Us, too.”
Rarity nodded. She’d stepped a little closer to Sunset, not quite committing to the embrace but tiptoeing closer to it all the same. “You’re never far from my thoughts. It’s just…”
Sunset cocked her head a little, though she didn’t speak the question aloud.
It’d take Rarity a few moments to elaborate, using the pause to compose her words to her liking enough to say them. “It’s weird for me. I’m not…really…sure what to make of the…” She mouthed a couple things indecisively, tripping despite her preparation. “It- the- I’ve never had a-”
“Girlfriend.”
“Yes.” Rarity nodded, then a little less confidently, “Yes. It’s…I don’t know.” The playing with her hair became a little more anxiety-charged than before. “I’m worried it’s…” She gesticulated vaguely with her other hand, communicating little beyond her nervous energy as she tried to explain herself. “I-I don’t know. It’s not…normal, for me, I don’t quite…I don’t fully understand it.”
Sunset nodded along as Rarity spoke, letting her do so at her own pace. She occasionally rubbed Rarity’s back in what she hoped was an assuring gesture. Admittedly, she didn’t really have the full context for why this was so disruptive for Rarity (surely she just was also into girls?), but Sunset both had the benefit of an outside perspective and was a fair bit more confident in her own sexuality. This wasn’t exactly a novel topic for her. “It doesn’t look that weird to me, to be honest. I’m thinking back to that conversation we had a while ago about this, and it doesn’t sound like this is new. To me, anyway.”
“I don’t know.”
The meekness in Rarity’s voice made Sunset hesitate. At the same time, though, it made her want to step up a bit and try to make it better somehow. She strongly disliked a scared Rarity. “...well, look, I’ll be up front about it: I’m biased. I like you a lot. Maybe more than a lot.” Her hug around Rarity’s waist tightened for a few moments. “You’re really important to me. I would like more of you...” She took in a breath, trying to ease out what came next. “...but I also want you to be comfortable. So…if this is like, a source of stress for you, and like, you need to step back and take some time to…y’know, process everythi-”
Rarity leaned forward against Sunset suddenly, tone swelling to something close to defiant: “I don’t want this to stop.”
Sunset couldn’t help the smile, pausing to give the girl a proper hug that concluded with a pat on the back. “I don’t either. But if you need some time...”
“I don’t want this to stop,” Rarity repeated. Her tone shrank a little after. “...but perhaps we keep it at a um…manageable pace. Is that okay?”
“Course it is. We’re going slow right now, aren’t we?”
“Well- yes.” Rarity hesitated, then a little bit more surely, “Yes, we are.”
Sunset traced another soft circle on Rarity’s back. “And this is fine, right?”
“It is…” Rarity contemplated this for a few moments. Her face shifted into a frown as she grumbled, “Not that anything’s making a grand deal more sense…”
Sunset could only shrug. She tried to suppress the grimace from the motion. “If you wanna like…y’know, do a little exploration, that might be informative, but I’m cool with whatever you need. I’m not in a big rush to third base here.”
It was barely audible when Rarity mumbled it, but it was audible all the same: “Yeah well, I kind of am and I’m annoyed.”
Sunset gave a sputtering laugh in surprise.
“I’m annoyed,” Rarity grouched. “I’m annoyed with all this. I know what I want, damn it, why’s it got to be so-” She gave a series of aggravated if vague gestures, then let out a wordless growl of vexation as she fell forward into Sunset with her arms crossed over her chest.
It was very amusing to see a pouty Rarity, but Sunset swallowed it back to make her point a bit more firmly. “Don’t rush it. Seriously, alright? Just go at your own pace.”
Rarity huffed in frustration. “I really wish I was more at peace with this.”
“It’d be nice,” Sunset admitted. “But you’re not, so don’t rush it. I’ve got enough regrets already, and the last thing I want is to be one of yours on top of everything else.”
This was met with silence.
It took a couple of seconds for Sunset to realize what she’d said. When she did, she cleared her throat. “Sorry.”
“It’s alright, darling.”
If either girl had more to say about that, they failed to express it, allowing the silence to take over where it had been waiting for its cue. It wasn’t precisely peaceful, at first, though it wasn’t difficult for Sunset to focus more on where Rarity was leaning into her. Touch with Rarity was always nice to think about. Better than most things, really…
…though saying that, it was a little difficult to focus on that, either. Sunset grunted quietly as she shifted where she stood, and then said in a hushed voice, “Can we sit? My back’s killing me.”
“Oh-” Rarity took her weight off of Sunset with a start. “Of course! Sorry, I- I didn’t mean to pin you.”
“No no, it’s cool.” Sunset chuckled as she stiffly began the process of lowering herself to the floor, with Rarity following her down the whole way. “I have been thoroughly enjoying you pinning me to the wall like this.”
Rarity scoffed and rolled her eyes with an amused smile. “Oh, please. You make it sound so violent.”
“It’d be hot if it was.”
Whap, went Rarity’s hand against Sunset’s shoulder. “You quit that.”
“What?” Sunset tried as hard as she could to sound innocent. “I’m just saying-”
“Well quit saying.” Despite her demanding tone, Rarity was already settling in under Sunset’s arm, nestling cozily into her side. “You’re killing the mood.”
“Well look, you pinned me against the wall for a reason, and it wasn’t cuz I’m smooth.”
Rarity let her head fall to the side until it came to rest against Sunset’s shoulder. “You’re something alright.”
The grin on Sunset’s face shone at full force for a few moments, then softened as she laid her head against Rarity’s. She took in a breath as her eyes slipped closed, then released it as a gentle sigh.
There weren't any words after that. As was so often the case between the two of them, words weren’t necessary to say what they meant to tell each other.
You know what sucked for Sunset lately?
Everything. Everything had sucked.
Sunset began the week by having some of the worst back pain of her life, in addition to the usual pain in the rest of her, because she hadn’t slept on a comfortable or warm surface with better back support than the average block of wood in months. She also hadn’t slept in the same place twice for this entire week because her “bedroom” made a better walk-in freezer than a place to lay one’s head at night. To no one’s surprise (despite how hard she tried to be surprised), Sunset Shimmer was also sick. She had picked up a cough after the library episode, and that cough had not only failed to get better, but also got substantially worse. Good timing, because she was just thinking to herself the other night how she was having far too easy a time sleeping and needed to fix that in order to meet her misery quota. Thank goodness.
In pain at all hours, already generally low on sleep, drained of energy, and now periodically forgetting how to breathe, it could be said that Sunset Shimmer’s already shitty quality of life had reached a new all-time low.
And then she looked down at her feet as she walked to school one morning and found the edge of a twenty dollar bill sticking out from under her shoe. She had nearly slipped on it, mind, but it was, indeed, a whole-ass, honest-to-Harmony, authentic twenty dollar bill just sitting there on the ground, the minted green face on the front staring up at her where she had flattened it to the sidewalk.
Sunset had lived in the human world for the last four years. She had walked a lot of places in Canterlot, high foot traffic and low, in places of business and in places where the only reason anyone had to be there was because they were on their way to somewhere else. The largest denomination of money that she had ever found on the ground up till then was a single dollar bill, which had immediately been picked up by the person who had dropped it in front of the vending machine they had been trying to feed it into. The largest sum of money that she’d ever found unattended was a pair of quarters. This was a twenty dollar bill.
She almost didn’t know what she was looking at. Her eyes saw it, sure, and her hands felt it as she picked up the thing and straightened it out, flattened out its wrinkles, and rubbed her fingers across it as though trying to be certain beyond certain that this was what it appeared to be, and…it all seemed authentic. It looked like a twenty dollar bill. It felt like a twenty dollar bill. It had no business being a twenty dollar bill, and certainly not one that had ended up in her hands in that exact moment, but no one stormed up to her and demanded it back, and the only thing that came off on her fingertips when she rubbed them across it was some of the dirt from the sidewalk.
After a few seconds of standing there staring, the shock of it passed just enough for Sunset to grin to herself so hard that it threatened to split her face in half. She was about to do a cheer when the coughing fit cut her off, which she took as a sign to immediately stuff the bill in her pocket and scramble out of there, just on the off chance that whoever lost this thing turned their head and saw some scrawny kid about to do a song and dance about their lucky find.
No one stopped her. No one followed. No one even really seemed to notice. She was just…twenty dollars richer. Immediately. Out of nowhere.
Suffice it to say Sunset was over the moon with this find. She had twenty dollars worth of problem solving to throw at any number of the vast quantity of problems she had in her life, and to her that felt enormous. There were so many things that twenty dollars could cover, and the sheer number of options that had just opened up to her at that moment felt dizzying in breadth. It was enough that she had almost started to cry, and not because of how her eyes hadn’t quit leaking fluid since she woke up that morning.
Okay, first things first: school. She was on her way to school when she found that bill on the sidewalk. Upon consideration, Sunset made the call then and there that she had better things to do than go to school, because she had twenty bucking dollars to figure out what to do with. Forget school, she was rich.
Secondly: what did she spend this on? She had a lot of options, certainly, but only twenty dollars to cover any of them, and she did not have much faith that she’d get this lucky once, nevermind twice. Once she spent it, it’d be gone, so she had to make it count.
Sunset broke away from her route to school to find a laundromat - it wasn’t what she was specifically looking for, per se, but it would suit her purposes just fine. There weren’t many people inside, and it was both warm and relatively comfortable enough that she could devote as much focus as she possibly could toward this incredibly important decision. She managed to pawn a pen and a piece of printer paper off of the attendant there and then sat down at a table in the far corner of the room, scribbling away her thoughts and scratching out some basic math as she weighed her options as though lives depended on them.
Twenty dollars seemed like a lot of money, after having gone without much of anything since the start of fall, but upon more meaningful consideration, Sunset realized that twenty dollars was not all that much. It was a fairly large chunk of cash to just end up with, sure, but there wasn’t a lot she could think of buying that she needed which would go especially far.
Twenty dollars could get you a fair amount of groceries, if you knew what to buy and where to shop for it. It didn’t take her very long to rule this out, however - as much as it would be nice to have more than a single thawed meal a day at the school cafeteria five out of seven days a week, food was actually not the biggest concern that Sunset had. The food situation was not good, but it also wasn’t going to kill her. The same could not be said about the levels of warmth that she had access to, something that had long since been insufficient to keep her health from deteriorating (she had to pause that thought as her respiratory system chose that moment to one again tie and untie itself in a knot, seemingly as though just to emphasize the point). The cold absolutely would kill her, and it would get worse, and she would not make it unless she did something about it. Throwing some money at the issue seemed like a pretty good idea, all things considered.
But did she want to throw money at this problem? Anything she did buy was a lost opportunity to spend it on something else, and that itself was enough to make her pause from an otherwise obvious course of action, because she did have options here. Most pointedly, Rarity had offered more than once to go shopping with her, and whenever Rarity offered something like this, there was an unstated offer to foot the bill on whatever expenses were accrued. Sunset had never liked the idea of someone spending money on her, even when she needed it - especially these days, and especially when the person who’d be paying was someone she had recently wronged. It left a bad taste in her mouth at the best of times, but the injustice of it went from a bad taste to nausea-inducing. Even just toying with the idea now made her already unsteady stomach twitch a little.
…but all she had was twenty dollars. If she got clothes herself, she’d have little money leftover for any of her other needs. It’s not as though Rarity would mind, either - hell, she’d probably thank Sunset for the opportunity.
And where would that leave her? Warmer, safer, able to do more of what she wanted while someone else paid for it? Profiting from the generosity of people who cared about her while she thought only of herself? Exploiting her partner for her own benefit again?
Sunset clenched her fists and shoved the idea from her mind hard enough that, were it a person, it would have been knocked from its seat and across the laundromat floor. She felt like less of a person for even having seriously weighed the option like that, because it wasn’t an option. She did this to herself, so she’d get herself out of it or die trying. Nothing else was right and she’d hear no alternatives - not from her friends, and certainly not from that opportunistic little voice in the back of her head reminding her of how much easier it would be if she offloaded her burdens onto the people around her.
…clothes it was, then. She’d blow her money on a sweater or something and if that was that, then so be it. She’d deal with what came after.
Pants would also be nice - maybe nicer than a sweater. She had a jacket, even if it wasn’t the thickest jacket ever, and even if she wore every pair of jeans she owned all at once, it still probably wouldn’t be good enough to keep her warm enough to sleep through the worst this winter would bring…nevermind that by this point half of them were falling off her ass without a belt. And hell, even with a belt. She’d lost a lot of weight since CHS became her main source of food. She was rapidly turning her skinny jeans into regular jeans, and it’s not because the jeans were shrinking.
Maybe it should be a blanket, actually - a properly warm blanket, one she could huddle up in while a hard snow came down outside as January bore its teeth. Sleep was her biggest consideration for warmth anyway, since she could alw- oh shit, winter break. She wasn’t even going to have CHS for much longer, and that was both her most readily available source of food and water as well as a heated interior to spend half a day in for most days of the week. What was she going to do when winter break came? Maybe she did need the food…but what good was the food going to do if she froze to death? She’d starve in a few weeks, but she’d freeze in a few hours.
…shit, and power, too. On top of everything else, it would be a lot harder to keep her phone charged up and able to contact anyone if she didn’t have somewhere like CHS that would be cool with her using their power outlets. She could probably get away with it elsewhere, but…did that matter? …no that probably mattered, she needed to keep that microscopic friend circle she’d stumbled into circulating, because she got things out of them that she needed. Rarity might be her only source of food here coming up soon, and while she wasn’t super clear on how buddy-buddy she and Fluttershy were anymore, any stop at her house was a stop out of the cold and into somewhere with hot water that had already been presented as accessible to her. And power.
Maybe the power thing was taken care of, if she leaned a bit more on Fluttershy…could she get away with that? Should she do that, even? It wasn’t obvious, and it was…somewhat uncomfortable, thinking on it. It felt a little opportunistic, but it was a little different cuz it was Fluttershy…was it though? Wasn’t that just taking advantage of her? She didn’t seem to mind it, but did it need to be something she minded for it to be wrong? Did it count as wrong, if she was doing it for survival?
What an unclean thought. Sunset hated thinking it, but she couldn’t not think it, either.
Maybe she couldn’t do this righteously at all. Maybe she was going to have to start seizing advantages if she expected to make it through the winter…so what, start stealing shit? From people around her? Because that was fair. Yes her life could depend on it but so bucking what? What was the point of survival if it meant adding tallies to the laundry list of crimes she’d already committed against the community here that had already gone above and beyond what it should do by suffering her existence? Was that the legacy she wanted to leave? A parasite to the bitter end? Was a corpse the legacy she wanted to leave, though?
So many things to consider. So many options, and none of them as clear-cut as they seemed at first.
Sunset sat hunched forward in her chair, leaning over the laundromat table as she stared at the notes she’d made, regularly pausing to cough on the sickness already afflicting her. She didn’t know how long she had been there, but it had been at least an hour, all the while agonizing over her options…and they were agonizing. There was so much to do, and she had so little ability to do any of it.
Twenty dollars. That’s all she had, and all she might ever get this winter. That was her survival budget: twenty dollars.
After sitting there for a while more, Sunset had a stray thought about the time, then glanced up in the direction of the laundromat attendant. Said attendant was an older woman currently more preoccupied with her phone than any of the three or four people in here, much less Sunset specifically, so it didn’t seem like her loitering here had done much. The momentary fear had dislodged her from the spiraling thoughts, however, and Sunset took the opportunity to step back slightly.
She had intended to skip school today, but Sunset was having second thoughts about that. It didn’t feel like any conclusions she’d reached so far had been helpful at all to figuring out what to do, and it didn’t take long for her to realize that she needed a break. Something else to focus on, even mundane activities like schoolwork, seemed welcome compared to the all-important task of trying to figure out how to spend her newfound fortune and the stress that had so far brought her. She’d be late to first period, but…whatever.
Sighing to herself (and then breaking into another coughing fit), Sunset pushed her aching body up out of her chair and shuffled out of the laundromat, zipping her jacket the rest of the way up and tucking herself into it as much as she could before shoving the door open with a shoulder and hitting the streets once more.
Sunset had been about two thirds of the way to school when she’d happened upon her little find, then ducked into more or less the first establishment she could find that was open and which would suffer her sitting there for an extended period. As a result, she didn’t have long to walk before she made her way up the street that led more or less straight to the school’s front door.
On impulse, Sunset glanced down the rows of the crammed parking lot to find Fluttershy’s usual parking spot, halfway expecting to see her in the driver’s seat, waiting for her. It was a little late in the day for that, though, so even if she could see into the car, she wouldn’t see Fluttershy there.
It had been a couple days since she’d sat with her. They hadn’t spoken since Sunset had snapped at her. She’d considered apologizing, and in a way still wanted to, but by this point she assumed that she’d missed her chance to. Just another fuckup to the pile.
She tried not to think about it. No point now.
Sunset yanked open the heavy front door to the school, had another coughing fit as she stepped inside, and kept her hands tucked in her pockets as she walked in from the cold. Her first period was across the school, so she had plenty of time to decide if she wanted to bother showing up to what remained of it or if she wanted to loiter a little and go straight to second period afterward.
She was in the process of making this decision when the chime of the intercom turning on pierced the silence filling the hallways, followed shortly after by vice principal Luna’s voice:
“Sunset Shimmer to the office, please.”
Sunset stopped mid-step, eyes slipping closed as she pursed her lips together. She recognized her mistake more or less immediately: she wasn’t paying attention to the path she was taking. She hadn’t walked directly in front of the office, per se, but she had taken a route that was in direct line of sight to it. Given that she was less than half a hall’s length from that spot when she’d been summoned, it didn’t take a lot to figure out what had happened.
Oh well. At least she knew what it was about.
Sunset turned on her heel and retraced her steps a short distance, then back towards the hall she really should have done a better job of avoiding. Sure enough, as Sunset was about halfway down the hall, vice principal Luna was in the process of stepping out of her office and, upon seeing Sunset Shimmer approaching, gave a light smile in greeting and held the door open for her. “You seem to be running a little behind this morning, miss Shimmer.”
Sunset put on her friendliest smile and gave a lackadaisical shrug as she strode up. The last of her steps leading into the vice principal's perpetually shaded office made up something of a strut, though it was undermined by the coughing fit she broke into when she went to reply. “Oh you know,” she finally managed. “These things happen.”
“From time to time, they’ve been known to.” The door closed behind Sunset with a soft click. “And it would appear that you’ve tracked something in along with you.”
Sunset paused to force a light cough to clear her throat, settling into the chair in front of Luna’s desk without invitation. It was familiar, which wasn’t great, though it was a comfortable chair, so that helped. Sort of. “It followed me home. Can I keep it?”
“That is entirely your prerogative,” Luna chuckled lightly. She pulled out the chair from her desk on her side of it and settled into it, posture relaxed. “I’d ask that you do what you can to keep it to yourself, however.”
“I’ll do my best, but you know me: deeply caring individual. Something something sharing, something something caring.”
“Last I checked, the transmission of sickness was not a part of that particular saying, miss Shimmer.”
Sunset shrugged both arms out with a good-natured smile. “Probably a regional dialect.”
“Ah, yes. I see.” Luna nodded along in apparent understanding, expression betraying nothing of whether it was in jest or not. “It must be from a region where transmitting airborne pathogens to one’s peers is a sign of great respect.”
“That’s the one.” Sunset aimed a finger gun at the vice principal as she said this, which she retracted to begin snapping lightly to herself in faux-thought. “Can’t think of the name, though…tip of my tongue.”
“Pox Romana, perhaps?”
Sunset started saying something, though it was then that her A in history kicked in and the joke landed. She snorted, which resulted in another coughing fit seizing up her airways.
The vice principal regarded this response for a moment with that statuesque expression of hers, then gave a light shrug. “Perhaps not. Geography was never my strong suit.” A beat. “Do please cover your mouth, however.”
“Sorry,” Sunset wheezed, trying (and failing) to bite off the tail end of it through the side of her fist. A box of tissues was slid across the length of the vice principal’s desk closer to her, and she accepted by plucking one or two from the box to cough a bit more into. She concluded with a heartfelt, slightly guttural, “Uck.”
“‘Tis the season,” Luna solemnly replied. “If you’d like a silver lining to appreciate, then at least you contracted it now. By the time you’re free of it, you’ll have ample time to enjoy the holidays in good health.”
“Assuming it doesn’t kill me.”
“I’m reasonably confident in your odds of survival.”
Sunset let out what she herself couldn’t quite decide was intended to be more of a scoff, a chuckle, or a half-hearted clearing of her throat. It was now that her gaze drifted, taking in what little of the room was visible; something about the room itself seemed to absorb light, and that was when the sun was fully up outside the window’s constantly closed blinds. As it was, those blinds were about the only thing that could be made out in this room. “Guess one of us has to be the optimist.”
Luna did not reply to this. The silence closed in through the shadows, though they were apparently deep enough that even the vice principal deemed it necessary to find an alternative light source. The gentle click of the lamp on her desk marked the moment when a dull orange glow filled the room, still barely enough to illuminate its full length but at least providing something else to see besides a wall of darkness.
Sunset kind of preferred the darkness, truthfully. The room wasn’t much to look at: a desk, a chair on either side of it, a phone, a name plate that read “Vice Principal Luna,” a shelf in the corner, and a bookshelf beneath the window with its blinds always shut. That was it. Everything was color-coded roughly the same shade of green, and it reminded Sunset of a dentist’s office, or plastic lawn chairs. It was clear that the vice principal had little love for this room by how little was in it and how it lacked much in the way of personal effects, or…really any kind of evidence that this place had any more time spent in it than was absolutely necessary. The utilitarianism was on par with that of a cubicle in an office tower downtown, and sometimes Sunset wondered if that was on purpose. Maybe she had no sense of aesthetic; maybe she did but couldn’t be bothered to put it into practice. Maybe she just hated the room and kept the place perpetually basked in shadows so that she didn’t have to look at it. It wasn’t clear.
Sunset’s arms crossed over her chest lightly as she inspected the side of the room opposite to the door, mainly because it was something to rest her eyes on that wasn’t the woman at her desk. Much like how Sunset couldn’t decide whether or not this room was kept as soulless as it felt on purpose, she also couldn’t ever decide whether or not Vice Principal Luna’s gaze could be rightly described as “piercing.” Whether or not it could, it definitely had weight, and she could feel every ounce of it beaming into the side of her head like a finger was pressing against her temple.
The atmosphere had shifted. At this point Sunset didn’t want to be the one to speak up, but she also didn’t really want to be here at all, so she’d speak if it meant getting this over with faster. “I’m assuming you didn’t bring me in here to keep you company.”
“Not quite,” the vice principal admitted. She maintained the quiet for another second or two, then went on. “I’ve noticed that you’ve been accruing a lot of tardies lately.”
Sunset merely shrugged. Her gaze remained on the bookshelf under the window. “Daylight savings. Sleep schedule. You know how it goes.”
“You’ve been accruing a great deal of unexcused absences as well.”
“I’m a deep sleeper.”
Luna’s eyebrow arched. “Several of the absences were after some classes had already been attended that day.”
“Sleepwalking.”
“Sleepwalking,” Luna repeated, disbelief plainly audible. “You’re blaming this on…sleepwalking.”
Sunset shrugged. She had no particular interest in sounding believable here, and she didn’t try. “Medical condition.”
“An intermittent sleepwalking medical condition.”
Sunset nodded.
“Which pertains specifically to daylight savings time.”
Sunset nodded again.
“And which has insofar never once been cited nor noted before this moment.”
Again, Sunset nodded. Midway through a coughing fit struck her, brief though it was.
“...and you’re certain that this is the story you mean to keep?”
Sunset looked at Luna, though she only met her sea green eyes for a few moments before she looked away again, crossing one leg over the other as she did. “Doesn’t really matter what I say here, so…”
Luna didn’t say anything to this. A few seconds later, she let out a quiet, tired sigh.
“Just get on with it,” Sunset muttered in a low voice. The vibration from it provoked the tickle in her throat, and she coughed again a handful of times. “We don’t get anything from talking about it, so just do the vice principal thing and we can get back to stuff we sort of halfway want to do.”
“That,” Luna began slowly, “is more difficult an ask than I believe you understand.”
At this, Sunset looked at Luna. She didn’t ask the question, but she waited for the explanation all the same.
“Normally, yes,” Luna gestured at Sunset where she sat. “This is where the conversation would broach such topics as sanctions and disciplinary action. Detention, in all likelihood, given the…well.” She rolled her wrist in Sunset’s direction and let it go unsaid. Luna’s hand then went back over her other hand atop her desk. “However, circumstances being what they are, I don’t believe such measures would be wholly appropriate. Perhaps as far as policy is concerned, the way forward is very clear, but…I believe we are well and truly beyond the conditions that school policy was ever meant to operate under.” Luna paused, her gaze settling securely on Sunset’s eyes. “You understand, yes?”
Sunset Shimmer said absolutely nothing. She was sitting up straight in her chair, staring unflinchingly back into the vice principal’s eyes, and when Luna maintained the look, Sunset matched it.
There were many people who found Vice Principal Luna to be an intimidating figure. Much like her sister, Vice Principal Luna had a great deal of self-control, and everything she did was done with intent. Even at ease, her presence was large enough to fill any room she entered, because she just had that kind of aura about her. She was merely second in command at a measly little high school in a city of generally little import, but Luna carried a power about her that went well above her station, and it wasn’t hard to see. More than a couple of students in the school and even other members of faculty knew Vice Principal Luna as a woman that you did not want to cross, irrespective of that normally gentle demeanor, because the potential was there. She could move mountains if she set her mind to it, and everyone knew it. Everyone saw it. Nevermind a stare, even a prolonged look from Luna could be withering.
Unlike most times in her life, however, Sunset had little to lose, and precious little left to be afraid for. Sunset thus had little trouble meeting Luna’s gaze and answering it with a defiance cast in steel. A coughing spell tickled at the back of her throat, but she swallowed it like it was nothing. You could have stabbed her with a knife and she’d have swallowed it. In that moment, she’d eat any amount of discomfort if it meant not being the one to break eye contact first.
So yeah, she understood. And no, she wouldn’t back down. Not here, not now. Not over this.
The seconds seemed to last for minutes at a time. After what could have just as well been hours, it was Luna who backed down first. Her gaze softened at some point, and after holding that gaze with Sunset for a few more moments, she sat back in her chair, hands slipping off the desk and into her lap. The creak the chair emitted was soft, but a pin dropping would have likely been fully audible right then, so this was practically rattling the room by comparison. “May I be candid with you, miss Shimmer?”
Sunset was silent. She just stared.
Luna took this in for a few seconds, then went on. “This is,” she began, slowly, “an awkward situation, for both myself and my sister. A lot has transpired lately which…” She paused as though taking great care to select her words. “...strains the limits of one’s verisimilitude, as it were. These are things that…” She had begun to gesture with one hand, though as her words hung, that hand’s fingers loosely curled, and the hand was lowered to her lap again. “They’re things I would not know how to begin to explain. Rather, I could, now that my sister and I have had time enough to…to formulate an explanation, but it would likely leave a listener…unsatisfied. There would be questions. More than I could afford to answer.” Several beats of silence. “More than you could afford to answer, especially.”
As before, Sunset said and did nothing. Her fists were clenched, and nary a muscle on her face so much as twitched.
Luna took in a breath, then released it quietly through her nose. Her fingers tapped rhythmically in her lap - the room was so quiet that her fingertips could be heard impacting the fabric of her pants beneath her desk. There was some manner of emotion on her face, but Sunset couldn’t identify it right then. “My sister and I both don’t want what happened to get out. It’s something we have been fortunate enough to be able to control up until now, but that control is in peril of being compromised. As it stands…” She brought one hand out of her lap to gesture at Sunset with it. “One untimely glance from a member of the board of education would result in their making note of a rather egregious lack of follow-up with a student that has been missing a lot of school lately. State funding is contingent on attendance, and this would compel them to question. If our explanations failed to satisfy them - or, perhaps, even if they did - there would likely be an investigation.” Her hand went back to her lap now. “If there is an investigation, I’m not confident in my ability to keep them from seeing some things that I’d rather they not see, nor my ability to impart the…particular understanding that I would rather they reach before they did.”
Sunset let loose a quiet scoff from the back of her throat. The coughing spell she’d been restraining seized that moment to escape, and Sunset turned her head to cough into a fist she brought to her mouth. Once it stopped, she lowered the fist, though she failed to re-establish eye contact. “And what understanding would that be?”
“That you’re not a danger.”
“You don’t know that,” Sunset spat back. There was something black in her voice, acrid and hot like tar. “I learned a lot from what happened. I could do all this over again if I wanted to. Differently. Better, even. I have options. I could do anything I wanted, and you couldn’t stop me. None of you could stop me.”
Luna’s tone was almost casual with the way she replied, “I don’t think it would come to that.”
“You don’t. Know that.”
“No?”
Sunset’s face had since contorted into a scowl. She aimed it where she had been staring, jaw clenched as she willed the bookshelf to catch ablaze with nothing but her gaze. Maybe if there was magic in the world, it would have. In her mind’s eye, she was emitting ribbons of smoke from all across her body. The chair was being peppered with embers, and the fabric was starting to smolder. Nothing could reach her without getting burned. Nothing could touch her.
“Sunset, look at me.”
Sunset absolutely did not do that.
Luna’s voice was at once soft yet firm. “Look at me when I ask you this, Sunset Shimmer.”
“And what if I don’t?”
“Sunset.”
Sunset’s scowl only deepened. Her already clenched fists tightened.
“Look.”
It was not compliance, and the venom with which Sunset whipped her head about to face Luna made it absolutely clear, at least in her mind.
Rather than wither like Sunset would have preferred, Vice Principal Luna’s slightly hardened features softened, and kept softening. In perhaps the most sincere voice that she’d ever been asked anything in her life, Luna asked her: “Do you want to hurt me, Sunset?”
Sunset could have said a lot of things, right then. She meant to, right up until she opened her mouth and felt her eyes sting and water. She mouthed something she couldn’t manage, and as suddenly as the will to fight had rushed in, it left her. The unfinished words escaped her throat as a single, malformed breath, and Sunset no longer had the ability to meet those eyes across the desk from her.
Not yet receiving an answer, Luna asked again, just like before: “Do you want to hurt me, Sunset?”
She almost hated herself for it, but Sunset did answer, and when she did, her voice was shaking: “No.”
The only response to this was the soft creak of Luna sitting back in her chair.
Sunset’s fists remained tightly clenched as she sat hunched forward, staring down at her hands in her lap. One of the joints of her fingers cracked lightly as they tightened further - it hurt a little, where her fingernails were digging into her skin, but she did not care. She did not care about pain. If anything, she welcomed it.
She was angry. She didn’t know what at, exactly, but Sunset was angry. She was furious. Tears burned her eyes, and she kept tightening her fists in the hopes that she’d find a way to clench them even harder, or even break them. She kept on trying, but all she managed to do was start to make her hands cramp. Even then, she continued to try up until the pain was unbearable and her hands were so tightly locked up that she almost couldn’t physically open them again. Embers burned where her fingernails had dug into her palm enough to break the skin. She hadn’t even realized she’d been clenching her jaw until she unclenched it, and her teeth ached from the shift in pressure. Her jaw hurt. Her hands hurt. Her arms hurt, her legs hurt, her back hurt, her neck hurt. Her head hurt. Her face hurt.
She was so sick of pain. Everything hurt, everything always hurt. She was always uncomfortable. If she didn’t hurt, then she was cold. Even the cold ended up hurting.
She wanted to break something. A primal craving gnawed at her, reaching up from out of her soul like a set of gnashing teeth of something unlovable and starving, craving for something to be ruined.
If she was holding something, she’d have crushed it. If her hands didn’t hurt so much, she would have grasped for something, twisted it, bent it, snapped it, flung it. If she had her magic, something would burn. This room would burn. The school would burn. It’d all burn. Everything would burn. The foundation would shake, the walls would crumble, the ceiling would crash down on her head, and it would all fucking burn. The whole goddamned world would burn to the ground around her, and she’d cast, and cast, and cast, until her horn gushed blood and her eyes sloughed from her skull, and it still wouldn’t be enough because it could never be enough. It could never be enough. Harmony itself would brand her, strip her cutie mark and replace it with the words of creation that spelled “violence,” and it still wouldn’t be enough.
Sunset didn’t notice the sound of the bell ringing outside the door. She didn’t notice her own hands in her hair, pulling on handfuls of it as hard as she could as her scalp burned. She didn’t notice Luna leave her seat to crouch down next to her on her knees, kneeling at the level where she could have looked into Sunset’s eyes if she’d ever thought to look up. She didn’t notice how she couldn’t breathe. She didn’t notice the tears on her face, or the sobs that wracked her entire body from head to toe, and how they wouldn’t stop. Couldn’t stop.
In that moment, and for many moments after, Sunset wasn’t a person. She was a pile of broken glass beneath a layer of skin that wasn’t even her own, and as the weight of the world shifted where it laid across her shoulders, so too did the glass. Everything fell out of alignment in a cascading chain reaction, and right there in that chair, Sunset shattered. She was bawling before she even knew what had happened, choking on her own sobs as her lungs continued their conspiracy against her, barely able to breathe past the swollen walls of her windpipe that squeezed inward like an invisible fist was trying to crush her throat.
There weren’t thoughts. There weren’t actions. There couldn’t be. All that there could be were tears, and a primal pain that leaked out of the shattered pile named Sunset Shimmer expressed through guttural, wordless sobbing.
Time had lost all meaning, but at some point or another, Luna had taken hold of Sunset. She had her arms tight around her, stroking her back. Sometimes she would tell her in a voice that sounded like love, “It’s going to be okay.”
Maybe that would mean something to her later. It didn’t matter right then.
Unfortunately, Sunset’s condition - both physically and mentally - caught up to her before it could. Between the coughing fits from her sickness, her failure to regulate her own breathing, and the hunched-over position that she had locked herself into, Sunset Shimmer ended up starving herself of air. Her crying came to a stop as her eyes rolled into the back of her head and she passed out.
Sunset didn't remember waking up.
The next thing she knew, she was in a room that she didn't recognize. Her thoughts were moving at rates of hours per mile, so it took her entirely too long before she recognized the nurse's office for what it was. Viewing the room from the unfamiliar spot she was at in it - sitting on the examination chair like you'd find in a doctor's office - was sufficient to scramble Sunset's ability to identify her surroundings for what felt like minutes.
She couldn't feel her limbs particularly clearly. Her hands felt like television static where they pushed against the chair to swing herself sideways in it, though when she did, she found herself being peppered with a pair of gentle swats to the arm and shoulder as she tried to rise. "Quit it, sit back," Nurse Redheart scolded. "You'll faceplant if you start moving like that."
Sunset lacked the bearings needed to put up any kind of resistance, so she stopped moving. As she did, she felt the entire room spiral around her, like she was at the bottom of a coffee mug that someone had just gotten done stirring.
Sunset could, theoretically, see everything that the nurse was doing. Her thoughts were as a slurry, however, and even as she watched Nurse Redheart move about, the information and conclusions sloughed off of her, leaving her feeling a greasy and cloudy sensation rather than anything vaguely resembling clarity. It wasn't until Nurse Redheart walked up to her that Sunset found her eyes able to focus, and that was only because several objects were presented more or less directly in her face, one at a time. "For the cough," the nurse told her, holding up a plastic bottle containing a deep red fluid, which was placed into a small white paper sack as she watched. A pill bottle was raised, and given a gentle shake - several dozen tiny capsules rattled inside. "Anxiety. As-needed." One slender finger tapped the label, which she read one particular line of emphatically: "Two to three times a day maximum. Alright? No more. Don't play."
Sunset nodded numbly. She went to take the bag, but the nurse gently swatted her hand, and she waited.
A small square container with an orange label was raised next, and held in front of Sunset. She managed to read the word 'Dayquil' on it. "Daytime." Into the bag it went. Then a similar box was raised, this one green. "Nighttime. If you take this with the cough syrup, you're going to be out, so be cool. Alright?"
Again, Sunset nodded numbly.
Nurse Redheart then put the last container into the paper sack. She rolled up the top of it and plucked a single narrow strip of tape from a dispenser on the table, stuck it on the rolled up part so that it would remain closed, and presented the sack to Sunset. Sunset less accepted the bag so much as she found her hands instinctively moving to take the thing that had been presented to her. "Take that home with you. Right now, just sit back and take it easy. Breathe deeply."
The instructions were comprehensible to Sunset, though she wasn't fully paying attention to it. The gears in her head were still in a semi-fluid state, but they had enough substance to them that she was able to start to parse the situation. After staring down at the bag in her hands full of medications, she looked at Nurse Redheart, who had started turning away when Sunset finally thought to speak up: "This seems like a lot."
Nurse Redheart gave a noncommittal noise in response. She kept her back to Sunset as she began to close several drawers and cabinets that had been open up till that moment.
Sunset watched her for a second or two, then looked back at the sack she'd been given. The simple movement of her head was enough to make the room dance, and she brought one hand to the side of her head, which still felt like it was made of static. The situation was off, and it took her a little longer to be able to articulate why. "Are you giving me medication?"
"Yes."
Another second or two was needed to process this. "A student? You're not a-"
Nurse Redheart delivered another gentle swat to Sunset's shoulder. "Sit back. I'm standing here watching you sway."
Sunset did as she was instructed, but she didn't let this go yet. "This doesn't seem very by the books."
"Yeah, well, uh..." Nurse Redheart placed one hand on her hip as she turned in place, giving the door to the office a thorough inspection to assure it was closed before turning back to Sunset with her response: "Fuck the books. Take your medicine, feel better."
"Y-"
Nurse Redheart threw up a hand to silence this as she sharply yet levelly informed, "Don't want to hear it. Take your medicine, feel better."
Sunset...wanted to refuse. She thought to do so, but she was still reeling from having woken up to this, and frankly she didn't know how to. She wasn't even sure she could refuse, when it was coming from the nurse who'd looked her in the eye and informed her to her face, "Fuck the books." What do you even say to that?
Evidently, you said nothing. Sunset ended up doing just that, simply holding the paper bag filled with medication she was not supposed to be given as Nurse Redheart stepped out of the room, citing some reason or another that Sunset didn't quite catch.
Sunset's focus was completely shot from that point on. Time passed, but she tracked little of it as the day more or less ran her over. At some point she laid down - on a bed, on a chair, on a table...didn't matter. Nothing mattered. She was out before her eyes had finished closing, and that was that.
Author's Note
Well, it started looking like it was gonna be a good day. Then her passive activated.
Fun fact: this chapter happened because my friend told me in a Discord call, and I quote: "So I got this new anime plot: Sunset Shimmer looks down and finds 20 dollars on the ground."
I laughed. Then I blinked and realized I was 2400 words into a chapter right after I'd said things were probably going to slow down, writing out this new anime plot. And boy, is it ever an anime plot.
Probably. I don't watch anime.
My friend says she'd watch the Sunset Shimmer Finds 20 Dollars anime, but I think she's biased.
Anyway, hope you liked the read. Everything about this chapter took me completely by surprise, but in that way like I'm not sure why I was surprised by any of what happened. Felt like I was cooking on this one, too. No idea where it came from but I'm very happy with how this chapter came out.
The color of the day was gray.
Outside, more or less all day, the only color that the sky had been was gray. The sun could be observed only in the way that there was a difference between day and night, and if you wanted anything more than that you would need to take to the air and rise above the carpet of clouds permanently hanging about every square inch of the heavens for countless miles in all directions. The clouds themselves had been intermittently spitting a fine mist from their voluminous depths off and on for the entire afternoon, seemingly determined to bring about the cold misery of a rainy day without ever committing to the actual rain, and it had done so with surprising efficiency. Every surface outside was damp with an icy cold, too dry to bring an umbrella yet too wet to not consider more watertight apparel.
It was on days like these where collective spirits always seemed the lowest. These were the days that were best spent indoors, not because it felt any better inside, but because doing anything else sounded like so much more work than it normally did with nothing to counterbalance it.
Unlike most people, Sunset hated staying in for the day. Her home was terrible. The bed was the most appealing surface in the squalid little structure by a wide margin, and it was also the warmest spot in it, which meant it was about the only place she ever went in it. There was no point being anywhere else but under the covers anymore because there was functionally no difference between inside and outside other than the roof overhead, and even that was starting to erode away in certain places. That hole in the corner of the bedroom was easily several inches wider than it was when she first got here months ago, and it wasn’t getting any smaller as time passed.
Sunset stood in the doorway to the bedroom (if you could call it that), hands in her pockets, staring long and hard at that misshapen bed with its knotted, unwashed covers covered in snared strands of fabric and rips. Her mouth still tasted off, the flavor of that gag-inducing cough syrup still lingering on her tongue like an old regret, and she blinked eyelids that felt heavier and more jagged-edged than they really ought to have. She hadn’t eaten in three days, yet she didn’t feel hungry, nor had any particular desire to eat anything, despite knowing she should. She was only just warm enough to not be said to be cold, yet she found herself shivering periodically and the need to bundle up in something or don an extra pair of jeans sometimes rose up into her list of desires.
As she stood there, staring at that bed she’d spent so many hours in and knew of the comfort it would bring her compared to standing there across the room from it, Sunset had no interest in getting into the sheets. Instead, she was weighing the possibility of making use of the lighter in her pocket with what little fuel it had left to light the mattress and everything atop it on fire.
There was no particular driving force behind this thought. This wasn’t a matter of anger, or lashing out. She didn’t even feel that strongly about it. She didn’t feel especially strongly about anything, truth be told. She felt about as gray on the inside as the skies looked outside. She was flat. Not calm, per se, but filled with flat, dead air that might be potentially described as “calm” in the same way one might describe a fox as being a cat. In the most superficial way this was sort of an okay descriptor, but it took little to break the analogy down.
No, emotion wasn’t a factor in this impulse she was contemplating acting on. It just…came to her, quietly, and she didn’t necessarily dislike the sound of it. It had some long-term problems, yeah, but that didn’t really mean anything to her right then. The thought of not having a bed anymore brought her nothing.
The start and end of the thought in her mind was that she could light it on fire. She could, theoretically, do so right that moment. It wouldn’t help her, but…she could do it. You know, if she wanted to.
And that was what was being weighed: if she wanted to or not. She didn’t want to, necessarily, but she also didn’t not want to, either. Nothing really pulled her on it, and time passing hadn’t seen the indecision swing one way or the other.
Sunset still hadn’t made a decision when her pants pocket vibrated. She didn’t react at first, but it continued to vibrate, revealing that it was an incoming call, not a text. She had, unfortunately, since donned an additional pair of jeans since she’d last put her phone in her pocket, and she hadn’t had the foresight to empty the now-secondary layer of jeans’ pockets to make the device more accessible. It thus took a little bit of wrestling to get the smart phone out of the buried pocket and into her palm, though when she did, she did not recognize the number being broadcasted on the screen.
She let it ring one more time, then brought the phone to her ear and answered it. She wasn’t eager to, but she decided to regardless, for no one reason in particular. Her voice was an octave lower than normal to fit her ashen mood when she spoke. “Hello?”
In stark contrast, the voice of the girl on the other end of the line was peppy, spunky, and downright cheerful. “Helloooo, is this Sunset?”
It only took a moment for her to recognize the voice, and when she did, Sunset hesitated. “Yes,” she cautiously replied, doing so a full second later than was strictly necessary.
“Sweet!” There was a quiet clatter of plates in the background, and Sunset could have sworn she heard something squeak, which evoked the faintest “Whoopsie” from the girl on the other end. She didn’t acknowledge it further as she went on. “So this is Pinkie Pie from school! I hope I’m not interrupting anything.”
“Um.” Sunset turned her head a little, looking at her bed. She’d unconsciously fished her aged lighter out of her other pants by now and had it in her hand. In spite of this, the prospect of acting on her previous impulse didn’t seem nearly as worthy of consideration as before, and it was deposited back into another, slightly more accessible pocket. “Not…really, no. What’d you, uh…can I help you?”
“SO glad you asked!” The sound of papers fluttering about could be heard coming from the other end of the line, concluding with what sounded like a single piece being snatched up. “So I heard from some of the others that you-” The pointing of a finger was all but audible, “-went and got sick on me!” She let out a trio of tsk’s. “Well we can’t have that! That’s what I thought, anyway, but it turns out maybe we can have that actually? See, I went to send you a Get Well Soon card, cuz you got sick! And you gotta get a Get Well Soon card when you’re sick, cuz how else are you gonna know to get well soon? It’s important! But then I realized I don’t have your address anywhere! And I looked all over the place, and I couldn’t find it anywhere! Which is weird cuz like I’m usually pretty good at finding these things! This is like, real basic stuff, right? Phone number, address, zip code, PO box, that kind of thing! Buuuut nope, nothing! Not in my notes anywhere, not in my notes I make of my notes when I can’t find things in my notes, not in my notes’ notes of notes I make when I leave them for other people cuz I have SO many notes you have NO idea and they gotta find things in them somehow, the sillies, but nope! I got nothing. Nodda! Zippo! Zilch! Non! Nein! No! No!” A half-beat. ”That was Spanish and Italian by the way, I just realized those sounded totally the same when I said it like that. Whoopsie-doopsie!”
Sunset had spoken to Pinkie Pie before, so the rate that the words were being vomited directly into her ear wasn’t exactly unprecedented. Even still, Sunset was really struggling to follow along. She felt like Pinkie Pie was directly beside her and that she had spun her around the room throughout the entire process of explaining all of this to her. “Uh…huh.”
“Yeah!” Pinkie seemed to choose that moment to be somewhat mindful of her rate of speaking, and it became a lot easier to follow along. “So basically, this is my way of asking what your address is!” A beat. “Well I mean it’s not really my way, it’s kinda just me asking what your address is. But it’s my way now I guess, so oh well! Spill the deets, sistah, where should I send this card to?”
Sunset’s voice and demeanor hardened a little. “Just send it to the school or something, I c- look, no, I don’t need a card.”
“But you gotta have a Get Well Soon card!” Pinkie whined. “It’s the most important part of recovery!”
“It’s just a cold. I’m not in the hospital or anything. I don’t need a card.”
“Yeah but it’s always nice to get a card or something, isn’t it?”
“I don’t want a card.” Sunset’s voice dropped several degrees. “And I don’t want to keep repeating myself.”
“Well- okay fine, fiiiiiine.” Pinkie sounded particularly begrudging at first, but her acquiescence became far more willing-sounding as she went on. “Fine, I won’t send a card this time, but can you at least give me your address? I’ve got a hole in my book of spreadsheets with your name on it, and now I can’t unsee it.”
“I don’t give out my address.”
“Apparently not!” Pinkie sounded a little frustrated as she blurted this, but mostly incredulous. “I can’t find you aaaaanywhere, dude. Like, do you have your place blacklisted on a government database or something? I couldn’t even find you on any of the school websites! And you attend that school!”
Sunset almost made some wry remark about the government, but she bit it back well before the words could reach her lips. “I take my privacy seriously.”
“How seriously do you n- okay don’t answer that, it’s fine, but can’t you just let me in on it just this once?”
“No.”
“Please?” Pinkie went back to sounding whiny. “The hole is right there! I hate holes in my mailing list! It makes my Pinkie brain go crazy!”
“No.” Sunset physically planted her feet a little firmer on the floor where she was standing. “You don’t need my address.”
“Look, I won’t send you anything, okay? I promise I’ll ask first, this is f-”
“No.”
“This is for my sanityyyyy!” She was really whining now, practically wailing. “Pinkie sanity is at a Pinkie Premium, Sunset, you don’t understaaannnnnnd!”
“No.” Sunset’s voice remained completely unsympathetic. “You don’t need my address, and I don’t want any mail.”
“But I just said I won’t send any ma-”
“Don’t care,” Sunset curtly interrupted. “My answer is no. Is that all you called for?”
Pinkie Pie let out an affronted noise on her end of the line.
Sunset shrugged one shoulder, as though Pinkie could see her. “Sorry.”
“You really don’t sound it.”
Sunset shrugged one shoulder again. “I gave you my answer. Not to sound callous or anything, but I don’t know what you expected after the first like…two, three times.”
The absolute foremost sound of some unformed word barely reached the speaker in Sunset’s ear. A few seconds passed, after which Pinkie spoke, sounding…not quite upset, but there was tension in her voice like a compressed spring. “That was all I was gonna call for, but now I’ve got something else.”
Sunset was not convinced she wanted to hear it, but she nonetheless responded, if coolly. “Yes?”
“What’s your deal?”
Sunset’s thumb began navigating towards the end call button where the screen hovered by her cheek. “Could you elaborate?”
“Exactly what I said.” There was no trace of any of the joy or positivity in Pinkie’s voice at this point. “Do you hate me or something?”
Sunset’s thumb remained poised. She wasn’t hanging up just yet, but she was prepared to. “No.”
“Then where do you get off like-” There was a brief fumble for words. “It’s like- it’s like you’re pissed at me. You treat all of us like this! Like I sp- I called you, I didn’t hunt you down or like- I gave you space, I’ve been giving you space, and I take time out of my day to j- I just wanted to do something nice! Alright?! That’s all I wanted to do! I just wanted to send you a stupid little card, because no one is nice to you, and I just thought that you’d- I just thought you’d give a shit, is all! Alright?! There, I said it! I just thought you’d give a shit, and it feels like this is a massive waste of time for you instead and I’m a little mad! I’m a little mad about it! And I don’t wanna be mad, because I hate being mad, and th-” The other end of the line was suddenly afflicted with several seconds of sounds of motion, like the phone or something near it had hit a surface and was gruffly shoved about on it before Pinkie started speaking again, her voice both slightly different audio-wise and also coming in much more curtly and swiftly. “Look fuck this, can we j- let’s just clear the air, okay? I don’t wanna do this anymore, let’s just clear the air.”
Sunset was, throughout the whole of this mini-rant, locked up. She gripped her phone tightly, though where normally she would have met this kind of energy with sparks and flame, she had a hard time getting her bearings enough to return fire. By the time she had her wits about her enough to shoot back, Pinkie had already moved to de-escalate, and it left Sunset reeling all over again. It was like trying to tango with a beach ball where every little shift in energy was someone else spiking it to another end of the room.
“Can we do that, Sunset?”
“Um.” Sunset hadn’t realized she’d fallen silent. She still felt on the back foot, but the prompt pushed her to try to say something. “I d- um. I don’t…know.”
Pinkie let out a little huff of a breath. The squeak of a chair could be heard on the other end of the line where Pinkie didn’t so much as sit as she dropped her full weight into whatever seat she’d found. “Can I be honest?”
Sunset scratched at the back of her neck. ”I uh…” Her footing shifted as she began to slowly pace across the room. “I guess I can’t stop you.”
“…I mean, you can. You can tell me to shut up and I’ll go away and we can be enemies or whatever, if that’s what you really want.”
Sunset’s free hand found her way to her face as she kneaded her eyes. Even with two varieties of cold medicine in her system, her eyes still burned a little. “I’m too tired to do the enemies thing.”
“Yeah, well enemies are lame anyway. I don’t like enemies.” Pinkie’s voice was steadily losing that tense quality, though it wasn’t relaxed yet, nor being filled with much in the way of her iconic light and life. “I’d much rather be friends.”
Sunset rolled her eyes beneath where she was kneading them. “Yes, I’m aware.”
“Well why can’t we be? I’ve been thinking about this a lot, and I don’t know why you’re being so-“ The silence would have been well-filled with random gesticulation, which is what Sunset imagined was happening. “You know?”
Sunset bit back a sarcastic remark. “I just want space right now.”
“D- do you, though??” The confusion was thick in Pinkie’s voice. “Cuz you can’t seem to get enough of Rarity, and you’re even being kind of friends with Fluttershy now! Is th- space?? But-“
The walls started going up. “That’s different.”
“Uh, yeah! Yeah it is? And it’s weird, cuz like- if you wanted space, that’s uh- that’s not really space? That looks more like you just kinda like them and don’t like anyone else.”
“It’s not like that.”
Pinkie made an unsure, helpless-sounding noise. “…okay? Well what’s it like, then?”
Sunset didn’t speak. Her eyes shifted to one side as she traced the space behind the air where her eyes fell.
“Do you want like…space from me? Am I a problem?”
“No.”
“Are you sure?”
Sunset’s lips moved, though she stopped herself. Her thoughts were moving quickly and felt air-thin when she went to grasp at them. “Maybe. I d- Idunno.”
“It feels like I’m a problem.” There was a creaking sound on Pinkie’s end. “It feels like you don’t want anything to do with me. And I mean…” Her voice became a little strained. “I guess I kinda get it, but…geez, Sunset.”
Sunset pressed down harder on her eyes. She felt the wall in front of her where she’d been slowly approaching it, so she turned around to pace the other way. “It’s not like that.”
“Well you tell me what it’s like, then! Cuz I don’t know.” It wasn’t quite vulnerability in Pinkie’s voice starting to emerge, but it was definitely some kind of sincerity like that. “Like, if there’s something I can do to fix this, please just tell me so I know what to do.”
The scoff snaked out of Sunset’s throat before she could stop it. “And you think I know what to do here?”
Pinkie’s response was nonverbal - vague noises of nondescript befuddlement and, shortly after, helpless acceptance came through the speaker in lieu of words.
Sunset wasn’t done yet, though. Vitriol continued rising up out of her throat where it had snuck out of her, and she had no trouble putting it to words: “I mind raped an entire bucking school. I tried to kill people. So you know what to d- what do I bucking do?! Huh? What about me? What am I supposed to do? You got a damn spreadsheet with that information on it?”
When Pinkie Pie responded, her voice was cold enough to make Sunset start to see her own breath: “I don’t, sorry. I’ve been a little busy trying to get all the information about what to do when my classmate tried to murder me.”
All air immediately vacated Sunset’s body. You’d think she’d been stabbed in the lung, the way her breath failed her.
Pinkie didn’t wait for her to recover. “I need to go. Get well soon.”
Sunset wanted to say about twenty things at once. She succeeded in saying none of them, and in fact was barely able to say anything at all. “I-“
And Pinkie Pie hung up. Sunset heard it immediately in the way the faux-silence from the speaker became true silence of a phone currently transmitting no more than the metal and plastic it was made of.
Sunset didn’t move for a while after that. She felt like she’d been slapped in the face, and she could do nothing more than stand where her pacing had brought her to the middle of the room, phone to her ear like she hadn’t quite registered that the call was over.
The only thing that was absolutely clear in her mind was that she’d bucked that up. She’d bucked that up really badly. It wasn’t obvious if she could un- buck that, either.
That was her chance. She didn’t know what exactly that chance was for, but whatever it was felt important, and she bucked it up. She bucked it up, and for all she knew, that was that.
Violence welled up in Sunset like a geyser. Before she could act on it, however, the pyroclastic eruption was cut off at the last possible second by a vibration in her hand. It was only reflex and muscle memory that gave her the kind of precision needed to pull up the text that had just arrived.
Fluttershyblah kind of day and I think it would be nice to have someone keep me company. Did you want to come over?
Sunset was barely aware of what she was doing, but she wasted no time in replying. It was the only thing that kept the phone in her hands instead of on a trajectory across the room, and she latched to it.
You
Fluttershy
Sunset continued to read over that last text. She didn’t respond to it, and it took everything she had to keep that device in her palm, even as her fingers tried feebly to crush the metal and plastic like a can of soda.
She had an objective now. It wasn’t much, barely an objective so much as an appointment, but it was something, and that something alone would be enough to keep both her feet on the floor and the top of her head - at least in that moment - from entering the ceiling and ejecting out through the roof.
It would take her quite a while to come down from the fury spawned from the upset. Once she had her wits about her enough that property wasn’t immediately in peril, she popped a Xanax it probably wasn’t legal for her to have and went to storm a lap or two around the block until blood no longer sounded like something that appealed.
After that, she just kinda kept walking. Even as the fire in her veins faded and the bloodlust waned, the steps continued. She had a path in mind, at first, but eventually she lost track of the time and found herself having slipped from that path. Her feet led the way from there.
Sunset’s footfalls were at once loud to her ears and barely noticeable. There was more than a little force behind her gaze, yet she kept her eyes to the ground, looking out a few yards from where her feet were currently falling and straying no further in any direction. She walked with purpose, and yet it could be said that she had nowhere to be, save only for where she claimed she would in a moment of action without consideration. She was a fire caster from birth, and yet for months now she had been fighting the cold with nary so much as a spark on her side. She was born a unicorn, yet the damp imprints that her shoes left in the dim beneath the street lights were that of a human’s.
She was Princess Celestia’s beloved student, and yet here she marched here in exile, where the light of Equestria’s sun could never reach her. She had once been able to call herself nobility, yet the life she had chosen brought her to the streets, which offered nothing and threatened to take everything. She was loathed and feared by every peer she had because of her actions, yet she was also able to claim that she had a partner that cared for her deeply. Even now as she walked to the residence of a kind and caring girl who would graciously welcome her into her own home, another kind and caring girl of the same friend group had reached out, been greatly disappointed, and now wanted nothing to do with her.
Contradiction after contradiction. Contrast after contrast.
It could be said that Sunset was a complicated person with a complicated situation to match, but it didn’t feel that way. It just felt like chaos. So many things were up in the air now, torn free from where they had once been stable fixtures in her life, and as Sunset started to ask herself questions and attempt to orient herself while everything came apart around her, she felt more lost than she ever had. Even the simple things had started to feel unnatural and out of place.
It was hard to care about any of it, at some point. With so much that had happened and so much that was wrong, it was easy to find one’s eyes crossing and, after a bit more time, deciding, “Fuck it.” She didn’t have the energy to keep track of it all, much less know how to fix it. She was tired, she was cold, she was weak, and it was so hard to care anymore. It was getting so hard to try.
…was she trying, though? Everything was hard, but what was she doing about it? What could she claim to have really done in the face of the adversity that was chipping her down, bit by bit, other than just beating her head against it? Her situation hadn’t improved since she hit the streets and found somewhere to stay. She was struggling, certainly, but was she trying?
It was…hard to tell. It felt like she was trying, but she didn’t know. Maybe she didn’t know what trying meant.
Had she ever tried before? Surely she had, yes? Surely. She knew what work was, she didn’t shy from it where it was necessary. She’d learned how to take pride in what she did, even if it was something she wouldn’t normally want to do. She could work hard. She’d done it before. She’d do it again, too.
Was this that? It was hard, absolutely, but what was she doing? What had she ever done? Had she ever done anything before? Was any of it even real?
Sunset found herself coming to a stop in her walk as a hand found a passing light post. Her head spun, and she had to physically brace herself against the post as her free hand came to her temple. Her eyes prickled, and the breaths she took came out shuddering and uneven.
Losing her mind. She was losing her mind. She could barely even walk down the street anymore before it felt like the sky was falling on her. Someday soon she wouldn’t even be able to set foot out the door before the ground gave way under her feet and dragged her straight to Hell.
Maybe she should have burned her bed after all. Then the rest of the place would go up, the kindling heap that it was, and she’d never walk out the door for that to happen, because there’d been no door. Crisis averted, right? That’s how that worked, right?
Sunset chuckled to herself, and didn’t stop for quite a while. She must have looked like a crazy thing as she chuckled ceaselessly under her breath while shambling along in the dark, dressed in old clothes with a loose, unhinged smile on her face, and that just made it funnier. It wasn’t funny, but it was funny. She hadn’t been walking out here for all that long (or at least that’s how it felt), yet the sky was already darkening enough that the street lamps were lit. She was sane, surely, yet every day that passed was one more step walked down the throat of madness, and right now it felt like she was sprinting.
Contradiction after contradiction. Contrast after contrast.
The sky continued to darken as minutes rallied closer towards hours. Soon the glow of the street lamps were the only lights by which Sunset could see by, and the already unfamiliar streets of this side of Canterlot became more foreign still as the shadows closed in from all sides.
Sunset was properly lost now. She found her way before long, but she did so by accident. She wouldn’t have known Fluttershy lived on this road if she hadn’t thought to finally look up and catch a glimpse at one of the street signs as she did so.
This entire street was fairly dense in trees, enough so that the lamps on this street tended to kick in an hour earlier than anywhere else. Fluttershy’s home was a white, brown-roofed two-story suburban house that looked like the property designer was completely obsessed with rectangles and had desperately needed an outlet. It was flat and blocky, but long, with a built-in garage and a few trees in the large yard that look positively ancient compared to anything else in the neighborhood. When Sunset had first seen it, she had judged the house as a little nondescript, though the flower bushes and shrubs nestled in front of the otherwise bland building were clearly given a lot of care, even if the weather had seen most of the flowers wither by now.
Were Sunset forced to try to describe the home, she would compare it to a button-up dress shirt that wasn’t obvious about whether its main intention was looking presentable or being nice clothes. That didn’t really matter, though, because it was also the only house on this street that had its porch light on, and it was on specifically because the residents were expecting her. It was, at that moment, the only place in all of Canterlot - or even the world - where Sunset Shimmer could be said to be truly welcome.
Sunset followed the path where it lazily serpentined its way up to the house. The sheer amount of marching and storming around she’d done for several hours seemed to have finally caught up with her, because as Sunset approached the porch, she felt her knees wobble with fatigue on both steps she had to scale to make it to the front door.
It wasn’t until she'd made it to the door and pushed the doorbell till she heard the chime go off that Sunset had a chance to properly appreciate how she felt. In addition to being fatigued from overexertion and perpetually under the weather, she was also tired, emotionally exhausted, chilly, on-and-off dizzy from both illness and acute anxiety, and on top of everything else, she hadn’t bathed in over a week. She also really, really wanted to be inside, and Sunset passed the time by chewing down her already permanently too-short nails, just on the off chance that there was one uneven edge of a nail she could fit her teeth around which hadn’t been gnawed out of existence yet.
Fortunately, she wasn’t kept waiting longer than a few seconds. Unfortunately, when the door opened, the sea foam complexion, five-o’clock shadow, and greasy smile on the man who answered the door was perhaps the last person that Sunset wanted to see. “We-he-he-helloooo there, my good lady,” Zephyr Breeze drawled warmly, leaning against the doorframe with an outstretched arm. “Sunset Shimmer, was it?”
“Yeah.” Sunset’s voice was small, and she found herself looking down at the floorboards where light from inside the house was spilling out. Even the threadbare smile felt like a major strain to hold up. “Fluttershy invited me.”
“Fluttershy did, eh?” Zephyr leaned in, grinning a little like he was getting in on some open secret he’d become privy to. “Isn’t it a little late in the day for a casual get-together?”
“It is.” Sunset shrank where she stood, eyes already on the floor shying back even further from him. It was nothing, it was clearly nothing, but in the moment it felt as though the comment was some kind of critique against her personally, and Sunset was feeling fragile enough that she all but physically started to curl in on herself for it. “I’m late. I’m sorry. I don’t have an excuse.”
“Oh, well, uh…” Zephyr‘s smooth routine faltered as he hesitated. He chuckled nervously to himself and scratched under his arm. “No- no need to apologize or anything, it’s uh…it’s all the same to me here.”
Sunset didn’t say anything. She stared hard at the floor between them, fists lightly clenched in her pockets. Even with just one person looking at her, all Sunset wanted to do was hide.
It was an awkward silence, one that Zephyr never found a way to move past before the irate voice of his sister snapped from inside the house with a remarkable bite: “It is COLD! Get OUT of the doorway!”
Zephyr Breeze jolted from where he was leaning like a whip had cracked by his ear, blurting, “Sorry! Sorry,” as he scrambled aside.
Sunset moved forward the instant the way was clear, not wanting to spend another moment outdoors if she didn’t have to. She didn’t quit moving once she started, and didn’t lift her gaze at all, keeping her eyes on the floor like meeting the gaze of another would cost her life. She stepped out of her crumbling shoes and left them by the door, then began to scale the stairs leading up to where she heard Fluttershy’s socks sliding up to the railing to greet her with a zip in her step. She smiled blindly in greeting back, though her eyes didn’t leave her own feet for a second, even to see what was ahead of her.
The moment she reached the top of the stairs, Fluttershy scurried over to her with open cheer, her smile all but glowing with sunlight. It was clear what she saw on Sunset’s face was not what she was hoping to see, however, and concern dampened the otherwise vibrant welcome nigh immediately. “Are you okay?”
Sunset kept smiling that plastic smile, already regretting finding Fluttershy’s face for the moment she had. “Yep.”
“You look like you’re about to cry.”
Sunset forced out a single airy chuckle. “I um…” She could feel the cracks growing already. Keeping her voice steady was difficult, and she couldn’t keep it totally level despite her best efforts. “I’ve had a really bad week.”
Fluttershy let out a soft noise of sympathy, compassion taking up a front row seat alongside the concern on her expression. “Can I help?”
Sunset went to respond, but all she managed to do was open her mouth, fail to find something that sounded like a good answer, and let the misshapen breath back out again with a helpless shake of her head.
When Sunset failed to answer, Fluttershy reached over and placed her hands on Sunset’s arm, then gently tugged, guiding her toward the hall behind them. Sunset didn’t have what it took to resist even if she wanted to, so she let herself be pulled along. She was steered past the upstairs bathroom and around the corner, headed towards the open door of Fluttershy’s room, which was promptly shut behind them.
No sooner did the latch click to indicate the way was sealed, Fluttershy let her hands slip from Sunset’s arm, stepping up a little closer to her as her voice softened. “Do you want to talk about it?”
Sunset…almost brushed it off, but with the open compassion on full display from Fluttershy, she found herself giving the question the consideration it felt due. The answer wasn’t all that different, though. “I don’t…” She didn’t finish. She had a few things she had meant to say that she didn’t, though the grimace said plenty enough to fill in the blanks.
Fluttershy of all people would get it, and she nodded along. “Would hugs help?”
Sunset didn’t know the answer to that. She took a few seconds to consider it, then mumbled, “Yeah.”
Fluttershy flashed a warm smile and opened up her arms invitingly. Sunset only paused a moment before taking a half-step forward and more or less sinking into Fluttershy’s arms, which closed around her in a hold that felt disproportionately embracing for how small Fluttershy’s presence normally was.
Something Sunset had become privy to early on upon getting to know Fluttershy was that Fluttershy gave amazing hugs. She had never identified precisely why that was the case, but any time she’d managed to catch Fluttershy in a huggy mood or otherwise willing to express affection (something that turned out to be fairly frequent, if she liked you and you were alone), she had never been left disappointed. Her aura itself seemed to radiate coziness, and something about the way that the girl felt physically seemed to synergize with it in such a way that she just felt…good. It felt good to touch Fluttershy. As mildly uncomfortable as it sounded when said aloud, Sunset wouldn’t know how else to describe it other than that Fluttershy was a very touchable kind of person. For as scrawny as she looked at first, that girl was incredibly easy to get lost in.
And for Sunset, nothing else sounded more appealing. Her arms curled around Fluttershy’s middle as her head fell forward into her pale rose hair. Her breathing became increasingly lopsided the more she tried to relax, and it didn’t take long before Sunset’s breaths were becoming procedurally more heavy as she tried not to start crying right then and there. She was failing.
“There there,” Fluttershy cooed, sounding like how her arms felt around Sunset. Even her voice was an extension of the hug. “It’ll be okay.”
Sunset was crumbling fast. “I’m falling apart,” she choked out, every word struggling to make it up out of her constricting throat. “It's all falling apart.”
“Shhh...”
“I can’t do this.” They were barely words coming out of Sunset anymore. “I can’t…”
“Shhhh…” Fluttershy nestled her head a little more snugly against Sunset’s, somehow wrapping herself that much more around the rest of her. “Shhh shh shh…”
Sunset said something else, but the words were completely garbled now, choked beyond recognition and distorted irreparably by the sobs wracking her whole body.
Fluttershy nodded softly. “I know.” The hug deepened, and as the sobs began to flow, a gentle, barely detectable sway picked up between the two of them, rocking Sunset back and forth just a hair. Just enough to feel it. “I know, and I’m here. I’ve got you.”
Conversation died with Sunset’s ability to articulate words. Fluttershy held her the entire time she cried, patting her back, rocking her, murmuring soft, sweet words into her ear as Sunset folded her soul inside-out and wrung it out into Fluttershy’s hair and shoulder.
Minutes passed. Sunset didn’t know how long she cried for, but once she started, she didn’t stop. Even once she’d run out of tears to shed, she didn’t let go of Fluttershy, occasionally whimpering faintly as she held onto the girl like a lifeline.
Fluttershy, meanwhile, just seemed happy to be here. She was a beacon of serenity in the maelstrom of chaos Sunset felt her life had turned into. At some point the words had stopped, and in their place Fluttershy had begun to quietly hum some nursery rhyme Sunset didn’t recognize, intoned softly to the beat of their gentle swaying in place.
One of the first coherent thoughts that came to Sunset as her composure cobbled itself back together was how lucky she was to know this girl. She wished she’d had the foresight to let her into her life years ago.
Sunset didn’t know when she stopped crying, but at some point she found herself having fallen silent and still. Her eyes burned, her throat felt glued shut with saliva and whatever other unflattering mix of fluids had her airways feeling gelatinous, and her face itched where streams of tears had begun to dry on her cheeks and beneath her eyes. She felt about twenty pounds heavier than when she’d entered this room, yet paradoxically somewhat lighter. Everything else felt thick, and the room swam a little. She could really feel the dizzy pulses as she continued to sway gently with Fluttershy, who she felt as though she’d physically grown into and around, like two handfuls of clay that had been in contact for too long.
Before anything could be said, a knock came at the door to Fluttershy’s room. It wasn’t especially loud, but in the quiet it may as well have been a hammer’s strikes. “Fluttershy,” came the voice of an older woman, “is your friend here yet?”
Fluttershy’s hold on Sunset had shifted the moment the noise came, and it wasn’t clear if she had intended to hold Sunset closer or was preparing to detach from her on short notice if need be. “Yes, mom,” she called back, looking over Sunset’s shoulder at the door.
“Does she still want to use the shower? Everything’s ready.”
“Yes, mom,” Fluttershy repeated. “We got distracted, sorry.”
Sunset felt something sarcastic bubble up from the back of her throat, but it had no chance of becoming words. She was silent for this exchange.
“Well, go ahead and move it along, girls.” The urging was friendly-sounding, if still a nudge. “Not to rush or anything, but you know how your father gets.”
“Okay, mom.” Fluttershy didn’t say more or move after that, cyan eyes locked on the door until the sound of footsteps could be heard retreating from the door into the hall. Once they were gone, she looked back at Sunset and gave a smile that was both apologetic and encouraging.
Sunset recognized the cue. She didn’t move, though, and let out a quiet grunt that had no meaning in particular.
“You’ll feel better after,” Fluttershy told her gently. Her arms were gradually retracting from around Sunset as she spoke to her. “Go get clean. I’ll be here when you’re done.”
Another grunt, this one reluctant. She didn’t fight it, though. Too tired.
Sunset shambled her way to the bathroom, which had the door open and the light on, waiting for her. Somewhere in the back of her head was the trivia factoid that this was the entire purpose of her having ever been to this house and why she was here at all now, but it was left rattling around in her skull, bouncing around and getting progressively more buried with all the other things in her head that she was simply too exhausted to remember.
The Shy household’s interior almost looked like it had been removed and then a log cabin had been transplanted inside of the otherwise regular suburban home, but the bathroom apparently had been skipped with that philosophy. The white floor was speckled with dozens of tiny hexagonal tiles, every countertop and the tub itself was fashioned to look like they were made of stone, and the wall lights looked like they’d been taken straight out of a fancy hotel somewhere and mounted on the walls across from the glass cube of a shower stall. An oversized pale towel had been hung on the side facing the wall so as to give the one inside it a modicum of privacy in the event of a walk-in, but that was it. It was a little out of place given the rest of the home’s interior, but then again, the home’s interior was out of place compared to its exterior, so perhaps that made it loop back around to looking normal, somehow? To someone’s eyes? At some point?
Weird house. The Shy’s had a weird house.
Whatever.
Sunset’s jacket hit the counter, then slid off a second later and hit the floor. She didn’t collect it, tossing her hole-speckled purple shirt where it had meant to go instead. It was only then that she had the thought to turn on the water, which filled the room with the soft shrillness of working plumbing and the splatter of water against a ceramic shower floor. She then went through the process of working her way out of one, then two, then three pairs of identical skinny jeans, the last layer of which she had no trouble slipping out of without undoing the button.
Still losing weight.
Whatever. She didn’t want to look at herself in the mirror anyway.
By the time she had shed out of all her other clothing, Sunset felt completely drained of any remaining energy, and simply opening the door and closing it on herself to stand in the water stream was about all she had left in her to do. She stood there blankly under the water stream as it fell down and splashed in her face and over her hair, any thought or impulse to do more having been cannibalized by her higher brain functions just to get her this far. Before long she found the prospect of standing to be entirely too much work, and she let her wobbly knees give out beneath her to sit on the shower floor as the artificial rain kept pouring down on her head.
Most of her shower was spent staring off into space, with any amount of cleaning that got done coming to her as an afterthought rather than…y’know…the whole reason for taking a shower. That wasn’t really on her mind. Water was here, it was warm, and she was…just kind of existing, sitting there like an extension of the scenery as the falling water did its best to wash away the ashes that Sunset felt in her soul.
There had been some days where this had been all Sunset had wanted to do, yet now she sat there and felt nothing. Really, as comfortable as the hot water felt, it wouldn’t change all that much. It might relax her muscles some, sure, but they’d still be sore. She’d still be tired. She’d be cleaner, but by the time she got another one of these, she’d be filthy again, and would have felt filthy for days at a time. It wouldn’t help her sleep, and any warmth she felt now wouldn’t carry on to the rest of the day, never mind the rest of the week.
This nice little experience she’d spend days looking forward to…changed nothing. It’d give her maybe a day or two where she felt better in one specific way, and then it’d all go right back to how it was before.
Sunset raised one hand to look at it. It was hard to make out the details through the water running over them and the mist hanging over her like a veil, but upon angling her arm such that the water no longer rolled down its length, she got a much clearer view of her fingers.
Her fingernails, especially, looked mangled where the prolonged moisture had caused the skin around them to puff up just a bit, highlighting all the spots where she had run out of nail and instead simply began to chew and bite off the endmost bits of skin around them where she couldn’t feel it. The heat of the water made her skin flush a little, and the flesh around her fingertips seemed to glow angrily from the damage that had been inflicted on them. It wasn’t uniform by any means, but all ten of her fingers looked like this. All ten digits looked gnawed and chewed on at the edges, like feral animals had gotten to them when she wasn’t looking.
She was physically falling to pieces. She couldn’t feed herself, she couldn’t sleep well enough to feel okay throughout the day, and she couldn’t keep herself healthy. And if that wasn’t bad enough, her mind was doing so poorly that she was devouring her own hands like some kind of freak of nature set to kill off the main cast in a horror film. She had so much stress and anxiety bearing down on her that she apparently didn’t know what to do with it except help her body break itself down even faster, and half the time she didn’t even know she was doing it. She certainly didn’t remember leaving her fingertips looking like that. She barely remembered chewing half of these nails ever, and every one of them were stripped all but completely bald. It was a wonder she even had nails anymore. Never mind the four ruts carved into both of her her palms that stung as the water ran over them, places where her anger had poured so freely that she had impaled herself with the jagged edges of what remained of those nails.
As Sunset sat there, realizing what she had done to her own hands, a growing sense of futility started to close in on her. It was slow, but steady, and there was little energy in Sunset left to fight it where it seeped in through the cracks.
This state she was in, her feeble attempts to make it better and fight off the ailments that were systematically dismantling her in body, mind, and soul…it all seemed a bit pointless, didn’t it?
Nothing was changing. She suffered every day, and nothing came of it. She weathered endless waves of a million and one discomforts, and nothing came of it. She made mistake after mistake with the people around her because of how she treated them, and nothing came of it.
She couldn’t live like this. She knew she couldn’t live like this. She’d known that well in advance, because the writing had been on the wall as plain as day, yet here she was, living like this.
The world was heartless, yes, but it wasn’t malicious. It hadn’t hunted her down, stripped her of any capacity to save herself, and then subjected her to the torments she was rapidly reaching the limit of her ability to endure. Nothing and nobody did this to her, it had just…happened. They were circumstances, and she’d let them happen. Any time she’d lifted a finger was to bucking eat it, apparently, rather than do something about them.
She’d asked for some help, and she got it. Fluttershy did her a favor, and now she got showers again, sometimes, after she’d lost the ability to get them on her own. She could ask Rarity for help, and she’d have clothes. She could reach out elsewhere, and she could probably have food. Hell, Fluttershy had already told her that she could arrange for Sunset to stay at her house for a little while, and that would take care of so many issues she’d been having. She probably wouldn’t have gotten sick if she’d just done something like that from the start, but now that she was sick, she was getting medication from people who really had no business getting it to her other than because they chose to help. People could get in trouble , for this and for other things, and yet they were doing it anyway, just to cover her ass.
What was she doing?
…it didn’t really matter, did it? She couldn’t take it anymore. She couldn’t do this.
Sunset pushed herself up to one knee, then reached up and delivered a fist to the water nozzle. With a hard thump, the flow of water stopped, and the pipes went silent. Steam continued to waft up and out of her glass cubicle, and with a feeble grunt, Sunset stood the rest of the way up. She took in a long, slow breath, then let it slip back out through her lips again in a haggard sigh to try and ready herself at all. It didn’t help.
That was fine. She knew what she had to do anyway.
Sunset got dressed. She would have loved to air dry and enjoy some time out of her fabric prison that she was locked in 24/7 these days, but she was in someone else’s house, and humans didn’t like nudity. She met herself in the middle and only put on one of the three pairs of jeans she had walked into the house with, leaving the other two folded on the counter to deal with later. It gave her pause for a moment, as the sight of them might look a little odd and invite some questions, but Sunset then reminded herself that it wouldn’t matter in a moment anyway. She didn’t bother brushing her hair, simply sweeping it out of her eyes and letting it drip down her neck and back as she opened the bathroom door and stepped out into the hall.
Fluttershy was in her bedroom, right where Sunset expected her to be. Fluttershy herself had taken the opportunity to change into her pajamas - a green onesie that continued to look exceptionally soft and comfortable, even from across the room. She had pulled up one of several bean bag chairs from its usual spot and plopped it down in front of the television in her room, which she now sat in front of, a controller in hand as some game or another filled the screen with lights and color. A small folding table had been put up next to her, which had a pair of cups filled with some steaming dark fluid in them.
It was not Sunset who announced her entry into the room, but the cat that revealed itself to be on Fluttershy’s lap and who did not take kindly to someone else entering. As the small gray animal leaped off of Fluttershy to duck under the bed, Fluttershy turned her head to watch this, then saw Sunset standing there and flashed a smile. “Hey.”
Sunset tried to smile back. One corner of her mouth lifted some, which is about all she could muster. It was maybe the biggest genuine smile she’d managed all day. “Hey.”
The television was filled with the word “PAUSED” shortly before Fluttershy put her game controller down and turned in her bean bag chair to face Sunset more fully. “Do you feel any better?”
Sunset’s gaze lowered as she interrogated this. She didn’t feel worse, but the heaviness of the cry from earlier had left her emotional reserves feeling completely depleted, and that hadn’t gone away, even if she did feel a little bit more securely held together. Mentally, at least. “Kinda.”
“That’s good.” Fluttershy hopped up from her bean bag chair to scoot it over in front of the folding table, then scooted across the room to grab another identical to it and placed it down directly beside the first, settling down on it as she pat the spot next to her invitingly. “I made some tea.”
“Tea, huh?” Sunset shuffled over to the bean bag chairs where they’d been set up in front of the foot of the bed, tentatively lowering herself down as indicated. Fluttershy nudged one of the two cups at the folding table in front of her, and she carefully took it. “It’s been a while since I’ve had tea.”
Once Sunset had taken her seat, Fluttershy wasted no time scooting her bean bag up close to Sunset’s, then settled into one side until their sides were touching.
Having been contemplating taking an exploratory sip, Sunset was a little surprised by this and gave Fluttershy a questioning if amused look. “Well you’re affectionate today.”
Fluttershy flashed another smile even as she shrank down shyly. “Um…well, you like it, and it seems like it makes you feel better…”
“Wasn’t complaining,” Sunset reminded, bringing the teacup to her lips. She sipped only the tiniest bit, found that it wasn’t too too hot, and then lowered it again to set down and let cool a bit more. “It’s just a little weird for you.”
Fluttershy squirmed some more, wriggling in place such that she sank a bit more into her bean bag chair till she was a head lower than her and looking up at her. ”I’m happy to see you.”
Sunset found herself with a small smile she couldn’t quite shake at that. “I’m happy to see you too.”
Fluttershy’s shy little smile doubled in size, even as she seemed to grow more bashful and hid her face a little. Didn’t stop her from leaning into Sunset’s side all this time, though.
Cute.
They didn’t say much for a little while after that. The new smile record for the day had grown a little, and Sunset found her spirits notedly improved as she quietly sipped away at the tea she’d been given. Black tea, she decided after she’d sampled enough of it to get a good enough sense of the flavor. She preferred red herself, but this was fine too. After a little while, Fluttershy sat up from where she’d slipped partially horizontal to help herself to her own tea, which was shared in comfortable silence.
Sunset’s thoughts didn’t stray far from what she’d been thinking about before, however. The atmosphere was nice, but the return of her previous considerations took a bite out of it for her as the gravity settled back in. Eventually her cup found the folding table again, and she pretended to comb her hair a bit into alignment with her fingers as she tried to prepare herself.
”Do you want a brush?”
“Uh.” It was a simple question, but Sunset stumbled over it all the same. “I guess.”
And Fluttershy was up again, quickly scampering to her dresser and doing a brief dig through the top drawer before scooting back over with a brush in hand, branded with a pair of tiny pink butterflies on one side. Rather than place it into the outstretched hand, Fluttershy plopped back down onto her bean bag chair and applied the brush to Sunset’s head herself, beginning the process of making that flame-like hair look like flames rather than a knot of red and yellow spaghetti. “I still love your hair…”
Sunset, still a little surprised by this, chuckled quietly. “Um…thank you. Born with it ‘n all, so…”
“It’s a good length for you.” Brush brush. The bangs were put back in the front from where they’d been slicked aside, though still being wet, they weren’t quite behaving as though they ought to. “And really full, and…nice color, and…I don’t know, I just really like your hair…”
“I used to braid it when I was a filly.”
Fluttershy paused mid-motion, retracting the brush from Sunset’s head and staring at her hair as she tried to visualize this. After a second or two, she frowned, then shook her head and resumed brushing. “I can’t see it. The way you normally do it is much nicer.”
Sunset nodded as she shrugged her shoulders. “I think so too, but it took me a while to like…y’know, actually live with my mane. My mom wouldn’t let me cut it, or I’d have shaved it.”
Fluttershy’s face contorted in repulsion as she let out a disgusted-sounded “blugh” noise. “That’s not okay.”
“She didn’t think so either,” Sunset chuckled. “I actually ended up learning how to sword fight because I wanted to go into the military so they’d buzz my mane off.”
Fluttershy’s brushing stopped again as she looked at Sunset in surprise. “You can sword fight?”
Sunset held her hand out flat and teetered it back and forth. “Kinda? It’s uh…I mainly used conjured weapons, and…y’know, I was a unicorn at the time, so the style probably doesn’t reeeeeally work like uh, like I am.”
“Did you ever get into the military?”
Sunset went to answer, then paused, tilting her head slightly to better accommodate Fluttershy’s resumed brushing. “Well, I never enlisted, but I did get tutored by a guy in the Guard, who used some military styles when he trained with me, so…uh…yesn’t.”
Fluttershy giggled. “Yesn’t...”
“Yesn’t, yes.” A beat. “N’t.”
Fluttershy giggled some more. She brushed a little longer and then asked, “Why did you want to cut off your hair?”
“Cuz it looks like fire.”
Fluttershy gave her an odd look.
Sunset simply shrugged. “Kinda had a complex. I didn’t wanna be a fire main.”
Fluttershy nodded along, though the understanding visibly landed a second or two later. “Right, you mentioned that before…that’s unfortunate.”
Sunset shrugged again. “I got over it.”
“It still doesn’t sound fun.”
Sunset shrugged a third time and didn’t comment further on it.
It was around this time that Fluttershy deemed Sunset’s hair sufficiently brushed. She lowered the utensil, gave Sunset a thorough look over, then nodded, apparently satisfied as she put the brush on the table and replaced it with her teacup. “It’s going to need another pass once it’s dried some more.”
“Yeah, it usually takes a couple extra passes.” Sunset mirrored Fluttershy and took up her teacup, giving it a sip. It was a bit cooler now, so she could drink from it more easily. “It wouldn’t if I could use the spell I know for that, but that would imply we could have nice things, and we can’t have that.”
Fluttershy giggled in between tea sips. "Well, that's what hair dryers are for."
“Yes, my hair dryer. The hair dryer spell. The spell that dries my hair. Which I can’t use because it’s a nice thing and life is suffering!”
“Just use a regular hair dryer,” Fluttershy laughed. “We have one in the bathroom!”
“I don’t think you do! Wanna know why? Because it’s a nice thing, and we can’t have that.”
“No!” Fluttershy was giggling freely now. “We’ve got one!”
Sunset monotoned a long, deliberating note in faux-thought. “Mmmmmmm sounds fake, nope.”
“We do though! I used it this morning!”
“Fake. Can’t have it.”
“Want me to go get it? I’ll show you.”
“Nah, it’s made up. Not buying it.”
“But I used it just this morning!”
“Sure you did.”
“I did, though!”
“No you didn’t.”
Fluttershy’s protests were broken up by laughter as she slipped partially sideways in her bean bag chair. When she did speak, she whined, “Sunseeeeeet!”
Sunset simply shrugged, smiling widely despite her aloof posture and dismissive responses. She was still quite tired and didn’t have the energy she would typically have in reserve for when she was joking around, but this was working just fine, and she took the giggling Fluttershy laying over in her bean bag chair as proof of victory here.
Things wound down again. Fluttershy eventually sat back up and leaned against Sunset’s side once again with a little sigh. “Well you’re bullying me again, so you must feel better.”
Sunset smiled into her cup before she lowered it again. “Give me a full night’s sleep and I’ll show you what bullying looks like. This is foal’s play.”
“Mean.” Fluttershy was all smiles in stark contrast to this accusation. “You’re mean.”
Sunset shrugged, nonchalantly replying, “Shoulda thought of that before you were so bullyable.”
“Mean.”
“It’s what you get, sorry. I don’t make the rules.” Sunset took a sip of tea as Fluttershy giggled. Then, more sincerely: “And I do feel better, yeah. Thank you.”
Fluttershy smiled earnestly at this. “That’s good.” Her gaze went to her tea as she gently swayed the cup to make the fluid start to rotate. “It seems like you could use some more smiles in your life.”
That was her opening. Sunset swallowed, the pleasant cheer she’d been feeling slipping from her face as she went to shift gears. “...that uh, reminds me…I need to talk to you about something.”
Fluttershy looked up from her tea, her smile replaced with a look of neutral curiosity.
Sunset found it a little harder to meet Fluttershy’s gaze, and so she looked down at the folding table in front of her instead, which she placed her teacup down on to free her hands. “I uh…” Her eyes passed over her fingertips, catching a glimpse of the gnawed, slightly tattered-looking skin around her chewed down nails. “I wanted to take you up on that offer.”
Fluttershy cocked her head to one side. She didn’t ask, though the question was all over her face.
“The…” Sunset rolled her wrist, gesticulating vaguely as she grasped at words. “The…a couple nights ago, um…you offered to have me stay here.”
”Oh.” Fluttershy sat up much straighter with a surprised, “Oh!” as her hands briefly went to her mouth. “Oh that. Right right right-”
“Yeah.” Sunset tapped her fingers slowly on the folding table with an air of discomfort. “Is that still an option, at all, or..?”
“Of course!” Fluttershy was quick to reply, and then just as quick to seem assuring. “Of course! It definitely is. I’d just um- I’d just have to talk to my mom about it, but- but we’ve had some people over before, we had um- we had a, um, three um- a family from our church had their pipes burst, and they stayed with us for two weeks while they got it fixed.”
Sunset nodded along, tentatively. “And uh…did those people also happen to be from another world too?”
“Nnnnooooo…” Fluttershy steepled her fingers together in front of her as her gaze shifted to the side, visibly going over this in her head. “That might…be a little weird, I guess. Um…”
“You’d have to lie if you wanted it airtight.”
Fluttershy winced a little. She chewed on the inside of her lips as she pressed them together in a thin line. “Yeah.”
Sunset sighed. This wasn’t a surprise, necessarily, but she had quietly been hoping that this was something that had been considered a bit more in advance. Currently, it seemed that it would require lying to make happen, so it was no different than ever. That she was roping someone else into it was starting to make her rethink this whole thing, as necessary as it seemed. Her options were few. “...of course, I am 18,” she began, in a tone implying the obviousness of what she was saying, as false as it was. “So I can be on my own…y’know, held back. Troubled youth…all that…”
Fluttershy didn’t immediately start nodding, though she did eventually, even as it brought her palpable discomfort. “...right…”
“And my parents are…” Sunset rolled her wrist, allowing that to hang there as her hand sat outstretched. “You know. Like they are.”
“Rrrriiiiight…” Fluttershy kept nodding, looking no more comforted despite the growing affirmation.
It wasn’t sitting well with Sunset. Quite the opposite, actually. “...look, I…” She put her hands down flat on the folding table, sitting up a little straighter. “I don’t want to make you have to do this, Fluttershy, I-”
“I want to help,” came the adamant response. “If you need help, you need help, Sunset, it’s winter. You need heat. You’re already sick.”
“And I’m not gonna argue that, but we- we gotta be realistic here, right? The bigger a lie gets, the more snagging points you develop, and it only takes one good catch before the entire thing comes crashing down, and then you’re bucked. Then you’re busted, and now suddenly we’re in a whole other situation, and I’m in hot water, because now I’m under the microscope. Cuz like- cuz why’s this highschooler going around homeless? Where’s her parents?” Sunset clapped her hands sharply. “Boom, I’m bucked. Right there, my whole case falls apart. I can’t recover from that.”
“But you have a home.”
Sunset’s entire face contorted like she had just stubbed her toe and was biting back the outcry. She tried to recover, but the initial response was far too pronounced for her to be able to hide that it had happened.
And of course, Fluttershy, having been looking right at her at the time, noticed this reaction. She didn’t quite seem to understand it, though, as her brow furrowed and she leaned forward in confusion. “But you have a home, Sunset. Why w…” It visibly landed. Fluttershy’s eyes widened as her expression shifted to one of shock.
Sunset’s eyes pressed tightly closed as she clenched one fist, already beginning to agonize over that one careless slip. Bad slip. Bad slip bad slip bad slip bad slip. That was a really bad slip. She just ousted herself immediately. Bad slip. Bad slip. Oh that was the worst slip she could have made right then.
“Sunset…?”
“I had Flash.” Sunset had to really work to keep her voice steady in the wake of this catastrophe in the making, though she couldn’t keep her words from coming out a little bit rushed. “I had Flash. I’ve had him for the longest time, basically the whole time, and that got- that wasn’t gonna work anymore.”
“Sunset-”
“It got complicated.” She thumped her fist on the table with this, making both their cups rattle. She didn’t want to look and put a face to the open horror building in Fluttershy’s voice. The thought of it had her voice growing an edge to it. “It got complicated, alright? It’s- what- what was I supposed to say?!” Sunset demanded this as she threw out her arms at Fluttershy, who looked more devastated by every word that left her mouth. “Who was I supposed to talk to?! Can you think of who would have supported me?!”
Fluttershy’s mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water. There were tears in her eyes, and she sounded so fragile when she feebly tried, “Your parents..?”
Both of Sunset’s hands snapped into fists. The muscles in her arms and wrists locked up as tight as iron, and it took every ounce of willpower she had not to bring them crashing down on this folding table and smash it in her lap. “My parents,” she seethed, “who already have their daughter, you mean?”
Fluttershy’s mouth hung agape, and she shook her head.
“This is a mirrored world.” Her fists found the folding table, and in spite of her restraint, the force of it was enough to cause tea to spill out of both cups atop it, nearly splashing herself in the process. “The only reason I knew how anything works here is because it’s all duplicates. Everyone is just another version of themselves from my world. Including me.”
Fluttershy’s head continued to shake, and she tried so hard to find her voice. ”Sunset-”
“I DON’T-” CRASH went her fists against the folding table, “ BELONG here! I NEVER belonged here! I’m never GOING to belong here!” Her voice was caving a little, and her eyes stung. “I’m an alien! I’m an alien freak pretending to be a human! I can never have support, because I don’t BELONG!” CRASH went the table, which collapsed under the blows delivered to it. With every ounce of energy it felt she had expended on this explosion of an outburst, there was no force left in her to spare, leaving Sunset only able to feebly choke out, "And I never will."
Silence fell over the room like a layer of wet cement. Fluttershy continued to stare at Sunset in abject horror, mouth open in waiting for words that had no intention of coming to her. The folding table’s thin legs were both snapped off at the part where they met the underside of the tabletop, and both teacups had been knocked to the floor, spilling all over the table they’d been knocked from and the carpet where they’d come to fall.
Nothing was said. No one moved.
Sunset took several long, shaking breaths as she stared hard at the damage she’d done, unsteadily opening up her fists. Renewed burning radiated from her palm where the scabbed over slices her fingers had already left before were stimulated, re-opening the small wounds in one or two places. Her eyes stung with tears, but there were precious few of those left for her to be able to shed at this point. There was nothing left in her to be emptied.
She didn’t know what to do now. It wasn’t supposed to get out like this, but she’d bucked that too. It’s like she couldn’t help but ruin everything, even when she was finally trying for once.
It didn’t matter. Fluttershy knew, despite her wishes. Nothing would undo that. What happened happened.
Meanwhile, Fluttershy looked absolutely crushed by this development. She stared at Sunset for a long time after that, expression a shifting mix of horror, sadness, and confusion - one or two tears slipped down her face, but she held it together, for the most part. At some point, her breathing became increasingly shallow and quick, and she put her hand to her chest as she tried her very best to stave off hyperventilation, and the panic attack that had inspired it.
And Sunset was there for her…or at least, she tried to be. She didn’t understand Fluttershy all that well yet, but she scooted over where she sat on her bean bag chair, leaning a bit over the small space between hers and Fluttershy’s to invade her space and lean into her side, as they had been doing back when the conversation was going well and everything was okay. In response to this, Fluttershy grabbed onto Sunset’s arm like she was dangling off a ledge, holding onto her for dear life as she struggled for breath. It stung a bit, but Sunset swallowed the discomfort for the sake of being some manner of support. She was responsible for this, after all.
She considered leaving at least once. She’d caused enough trouble already, but that’d leave Fluttershy all by herself to deal with something that had clearly caused her distress…so there Sunset remained, one arm fully occupied by a panic-stricken Fluttershy, the other reaching over so that she could rub her shoulder and try to be a calming presence in the situation she’d caused.
Fluttershy relaxed, gradually. The painful death grip on her arm slowly loosened as Fluttershy got her breathing back under control, and she scooted up closer to Sunset to nestle against her. Sunset reciprocated, remaining completely silent throughout it all, allowing the other girl to process this as she needed to. It didn’t hurt to have a little time to process it all herself, either.
The quiet remained unchallenged for the longest time. It felt like an hour, maybe more. Sunset wasn’t keeping track. It didn’t matter how long it took.
”I want to help.”
The reaction wasn’t immediate. After the second or two that it took to register what had been said, Sunset swallowed the lump in her throat where it had gathered. “I don’t want to drag you into this.”
The soft hands around her forearm tightened their grip a little. Her voice would sound firm if not for how it trembled with barely-contained emotion: ”No one deserves to be alone in this world, Sunset.”
Sunset opened her mouth, then closed it. Her eyes searched around the room briefly, like something in it might help with some point or another, but she found nothing, and had no point to speak of. Her eyes felt damp, for a moment.
”Please let me help you.”
She wanted to refuse. She tried to, at least a little bit, but in the end, all Sunset could manage was a small, “Okay.”
Sunset would be staying the night that night. There was no verbal agreement made between the two girls, but the understanding was clear enough in the moment for them both to reach the same conclusion independently of one another.
It wasn’t clear what would happen moving forward. Sunset had no plan, and neither did Fluttershy, despite how fervently determined she was to make a difference here. That wouldn’t be decided that night.
What was decided was that Fluttershy was on Sunset’s side, and that she had no intention of being anywhere else. Sunset didn’t know what difference that would make, but in that moment it felt…good. It felt good to have someone in on the act willing to stand by her. Really good.
It’s good to have friends.
Author's Note
Loooooooong one this time.
I meant to have a break after the part with Pinkie and call that a chapter, but what came next was in direct response to what I'd just written, so...may as well keep going, right? And then that went places, and here we are, nearly 13,000 words in with not a single good place to break it up after that spot I'd passed up.
I'm just a vessel for this story, man, I don't decide what happens. I'm along for the ride as much as you guys at this point.
Hope you enjoyed. The plot thickens!
“Hi my darling~ I got your message earlier, and I was hoping I’d catch you in person, but…C’est la vi. I haven’t been able to catch much air lately, and trust me, I’ve been trying. Until my workplace gets someone else in here, I’m stuck, but it’s not for nothing! I just so happen to be privy to a little event going on over the weekend - a rather spicy sale if I do say so myself. I for one think that would be a lovely time to go shopping, and it would be a delightful excuse to make up for lost time. I’m really trying to find some way to make it special, but at the end of the day if all I can say to have done is spend time with you, then I think that’s a good deal. I’ll see you soon, my sweet. Much love.”
The message concluded with the sound of a kiss being made in the air at the speaker. The chime signaling the voicemail had ended sounded off a moment later.
Sunset at once was left smiling and disappointed by the message. It would have been really nice to punctuate the days with some extra Rarity time. They hadn’t had one of those late-night phone calls in what felt like ages, even if it was closer to a week or a week and a half by now, and they also hadn’t really found much opportunity to spend some time together other than in passing throughout the school day. That’s all Sunset had wanted to do lately, with the kind of week she’d been having, but it seemed the trials of late would have to include missing the girl who had made these weeks and months that much more livable with her charm and the moments they’d shared. What made it worse was knowing that Rarity had already been feeling burnt out shortly before her schedule at work had doubled down, so she wasn’t faring much better on her end.
Sunset quietly hoped she’d finally get fed up and just quit. Yes she would need the money to be able to afford her own place eventually, but that place clearly had no respect for the girl’s time, and nothing about what she’d heard suggested there was an abundance of consideration being had for her regardless. You can’t just dump those kinds of hours on a student in the middle of the school year like that, and certainly not as the holiday crowds were starting to surge. Why was Rarity letting her availability get stepped on like that anyway? Who cared what the business needed? Rarity needed a life. Rarity deserved a life.
It frustrated Sunset. She tried to distance herself from that, though, as even thinking about it as much as she had was making her chest tighten. She’d been struggling with her temper enough as it was.
Sunset pulled her eyes away from the phone in her hand and sat back. Out the windshield and past the sea of vehicles sitting illuminated in the CHS parking lot, the front doors of the school stood tall, beckoning entry for anyone coming in out of the darkness. It managed to look at once shaded and well lit from the position of the lights in the courtyard around it, and it was in these subtle details - the arches, the stylized stonework, the way the shadows and light intermingled so intimately - that the likeness of the royal capital of Equestria could be seen. It took a bit of squinting, and perhaps just the right angle of the head, but it was there. It was like art.
Sunset let slip a sigh. The prospect of going to school was much less appealing on some days than others, that was for sure, but it was different this time. There was something she didn’t want to do beyond those doors, but it needed to be done, and it mattered too much to let it slide. It felt like duty.
Duty to who, though? Herself? The school? The city at large? The people who had her back, despite everything?
Sunset turned her head, gaze passing by what little could be seen in this dark Beetle’s interior to look at Fluttershy in the driver’s seat. Normally they sat together in the morning and listened to music while they were too groggy to have much in the way of conversation at such an early hour, but today the car was silent. Fluttershy’s head was back and her eyes were closed, taking advantage of the silence and the time they had to sit here to catch up on the sleep that she’d been missing over the weekend - anxiety was not lending itself well to rest, and a nap would do her good. It wasn’t entirely clear if the nap was deliberate, but it would do her good all the same, and Sunset wasn’t about to interrupt her rest.
It had only been slightly shorter than a day and a half since Sunset had made her slip of the tongue and spilled the truth of her situation, but it felt like in that time she and Fluttershy had bonded a lot. There was no doubt in her mind that Fluttershy was an ally, and she had nothing left to keep from her. Barriers had broken down almost literally overnight, and in addition to that closeness, it felt freeing to finally be fully and completely honest. Every day for the last four years had been spent under lock and key, even to the few people who she would consider friends, and now she finally had someone who she didn’t have to hide from. It was like stepping out into the sun’s light after having spent half her life wreathed in shadow.
Maybe they hadn’t come up with a more meaningful solution since they first started talking about it, but that didn’t change the fact that to Sunset, this was a gift. She wanted to honor it, somehow.
Sunset’s eyes left the dozing form of Fluttershy to find the dashboard. The readout was dark, but a tap of a button on the control panel brought it to life. 6:22 AM. 23 now. Probably late enough.
Sunset looked back at Fluttershy and cringed a little. It didn’t feel good, but she had to disturb her. She tried to do so as unobtrusively as possible by reaching over the divider between them and gently touching her shoulder in some mix between a tap and a nudge. “Fluttershy,” she whispered.
Fluttershy didn’t stir at first. Sunset had to tap her a couple more times before her eyes sluggishly opened. The sides of her hands were brought to her eyes a few moments later, muttering something that sounded like a question but could have just as easily been random noise.
Sunset tried not to feel too guilty as she gave a little smile in greeting, though it went unnoticed by the very groggy girl she’d just woken up. “Hey. I was gonna go in and I didn’t want you to be confused.”
Fluttershy gave a wordless sound in response. She slowly started to contort in her seat, stretching as little as the car seat would allow, then fell back and muttered blearily, “Okay.”
She tried not to feel too guilty, but that wasn’t to say Sunset succeeded. “Sorry.”
”It’s okay…” One of the hands rubbing her eyes slipped from her face well before the other did. She stared ahead at nothing for a bit, and just as Sunset was reaching for the door handle, Fluttershy asked in that half-conscious kind of voice, ”What did you want to do for…after school?”
Sunset paused. “Uh…” She sat back in her seat, hand still resting on the door handle as she considered this. “Goooood question, actually. Uh…”
They hadn’t done a particularly good job of planning, apparently. It had been a very stressful couple of days for Sunset, and Fluttershy didn’t exactly have the best weekend either, so there was some precedent for it, but still, it would probably pay to have a basic plan of action for…pretty much anything that wasn’t a weekend.
”You can always come to my house…”
Sunset pursed her lips together in uncertainty, hand slipping from its spot on the door handle and slapping quietly against her thigh. “I dunno, I don’t wanna overstay my welcome with that.”
”It’ll be okaY-“ The end was squeaked as Fluttershy spoke mid-stretch, arms going up high above her head as she arched her spine a little and dropped back down into the driver’s seat. ”I had someone over all the time back in freshman year, my parents don’t mind…”
“I’m more concerned about the staying over part, personally.”
”It might be okay…”
“And if it’s not?”
There wasn’t a verbal response to this. A few seconds later, Fluttershy let out a wordless noise of concern. It came off as concern for Sunset specifically.
Sunset smiled wearily in response to this. “Just weekends is a big improvement over what I had.”
”It’s not enough.” It sounded almost petulant and whiny at first, though Fluttershy’s voice filled out, increasing the assertive quality as she repeated herself: “It’s not enough.”
Sunset could only shrug. Her tone and smile became more fatalistic: “It’ll have to be.”
“It’s not.” Fluttershy’s fists lightly impacted her lap as she proclaimed this. “It’s not enough. No one should have to sleep on the street, Sunset, that’s awful. This is awful.”
Sunset didn’t know how to respond to that. Her gut instinct was to play it down, but that might come off as dismissive.
“There has to be something we can do.”
Sunset cast her gaze forward out the windshield, finding the front door to the school where it stood illuminated by its own lights. “I’m gonna talk to Luna.”
It wasn’t quite confusion on Fluttershy’s face, but it was adjacent to it. “The vice principal?”
Sunset nodded. “The school’s already trying to keep everything quiet. If they find out I’m on the street…well, that’s not exactly a good look for them. They’ve got every reason to want to put a stop to that.”
“Wouldn’t it make more sense to talk to the principal principal, in that case..?”
Sunset winced, then swallowed. The mental image of approaching Dean Celestia didn’t make it past the equivalent of the first frame before she was all but tackling it out of the back of her skull. “I trust Luna more.”
“Okay…” Fluttershy didn’t sound certain of this, but she sounded willing to take her word for it. “Were you gonna do that now?”
“Yeah.”
“Do you want me to come with you?”
Sunset couldn’t restrain the smile this brought her. She leaned over in her seat, reaching past the divider and stretching over a bit into Fluttershy’s space to give her a one-armed hug around the shoulders. “I really appreciate that, but I think I’d rather you get a little extra sleep while you’ve got a chance.”
Fluttershy let out a noise that was equal part complaint and coo as she leaned into the hug. “I wanna help…”
“I know.” Sunset tightened the hug just a bit. “It means a lot to me.”
Fluttershy hummed out another quiet coo. She closed her eyes and savored the embrace, slightly awkward though it was, given where it was happening.
Sunset was content to stay there like that for a little while. She rubbed Fluttershy’s shoulder, and once her back started to protest from how it was being bent to reach over, she retracted herself back over into her seat, then over further to prepare to leave. “I’ll be back.” The passenger side door opened, and Sunset stepped out into the cold morning air that swirled in to greet her. “And if I’m not, I’ll text you later.”
“Okay.” Fluttershy began to wave, then stopped as she suddenly blurted, “Oh!” She reached forward in her seat, pulling open the glove compartment, from which she retrieved a small rectangular container of thin blue metal with a plastic handle. Once she had it, she was quick to offer it to Sunset. “Don’t forget this!”
Sunset wasn’t sure what she was looking at as she accepted it, though it dawned on her as she recognized the lunch box for what it was and felt the weight of something inside that had been packed for her. She closed the passenger door, only to come around the perimeter of the Beetle to Fluttershy’s side with a growing grin, then pulled the driver door open so she could give Fluttershy a proper, full hug. It was returned in earnest with a smile made of sunlight.
It’d only been two days since they started working together, and already Sunset found herself feeling moved by small kindness after small kindness. Fluttershy was practically a wellspring of them.
She needed to honor this treatment somehow, one day. She had to.
Sunset strode up to the CHS main building with a spring in her step that all but halved the time it took to reach the front door. She made a quick detour to her locker to drop off the lunch box, and once that was done she made her way towards the hall that would bring her to the vice principal’s office.
The cheer that Fluttershy had put into her lasted until Sunset rounded the corner and saw the door to Luna’s office, where her momentum swiftly stalled out. She didn’t stop moving, but the speed of her steps had notably dropped as she made her way up till she was standing in front of it. Her hand twitched, but nothing else happened. Just staring at the door more or less directly in her face, currently closed.
Part of her was still wondering if perhaps this was a mistake. Maybe this wasn’t the best way to do things…but if this wasn’t it, Sunset didn’t know what else she could do. There wasn’t anyone who both knew what happened during the Fall Formal and was willing to help that Sunset felt even remotely comfortable approaching if not Vice Principal Luna. There certainly wasn’t anyone else who fit those criteria that were in a position where they might be able to do something. This was the start and finish of the options Sunset could think of without taking measures to fabricate more.
Logically speaking, it was worth a shot. The worst thing she could be told was no. Logic wasn’t what was holding her back, however.
Sunset stood there in front of the vice principal’s office door for at least a minute, maybe two. At some point she found herself with her jaw clenched and her eyes squeezed shut. It was at that moment that she impulsively threw up a fist and knocked it twice against the door, slightly harder than necessary, but quick enough that she couldn’t stop herself from doing it once she started. She regretted it, in a way, but it was too late now.
It only took a handful of seconds for someone to answer. The handle to the door jerked sideways as the door swung open, and Vice Principal Luna was standing over Sunset in the doorway. Her neutral expression shifted slightly to a familiar light smile she kept on-hand for when speaking with students. “Good morning, Miss Shimmer.”
“Good morning.” Sunset swallowed to try and unclench her throat, offering a strained smile that must surely have looked as forced as it felt. For the briefest of moments it felt as though she had stalled out completely, though at the last second before the pause became awkward she forced herself to speak. “Can I talk to you about something?”
“You can always talk to me about something, Sunset,” came the pleasant response. She stepped aside as she held the door open for Sunset to enter her office with her. “I wouldn’t be a very good vice principal if you couldn’t.”
Sunset simply gave a polite smile as she stepped into the room, which was - predictably - pitch black, save only for the lit screen of an open laptop sitting on Luna’s desk. She moved over to the seat in front of the desk and sat in it at roughly the same time that the door clicked shut.
Vice Principal Luna followed Sunset’s lead and sat down at her own respective spot at her desk, placing a hand atop the open laptop and closing it. For half a second, the room was completely lightless, though right after there was a click as the lamp was turned on, casting a dull orange glow that did a decent enough job at illuminating half the room. The jury was out on the other half, but nothing was in that half, so it didn’t matter.
Luna took a few moments to settle herself into her swiveling chair more comfortably. “So,” she began, expression and demeanor neutral if slanted positive, “what would you like to talk about?”
Sunset, by comparison, was not relaxed at all and did not look it. She hadn’t moved from how she’d been when her back end impacted the chair, her hands firmly wedged between her thighs like she was trying to warm them. She swallowed the lump in her throat and managed, “Um,” but that was as far as she got into her explanation.
Luna waited patiently. She shifted forward slightly where she sat and placed her elbows on her desk so she could rest her chin neatly atop her interlocked fingers. “Take your time,” she told her, voice pleasant and tone supportive. “We’ve an entire morning at our disposal today.”
Sunset nodded, but the reality was she didn’t know how to do this. She’d rehearsed a little, but such practice was long gone by now. She was really starting to regret not taking up Fluttershy on her offer to come with her. The full attention of Luna was, at least in that moment, a lot to handle.
It took Sunset several seconds more before she found her voice. It took several seconds after that before she was prepared to use it. “I,” she started, slowly, “don’t really know how to say this.”
Luna nodded, motions sedated and measured. Her gaze on Sunset had picked up a curious slant. Not quite inquisitive, but curious. “It’s unlike you to be so apprehensive, Sunset. Are you alright?”
“Yeah.” Sunset nodded, eyes falling to her lap in favor of trying to dodge her eyes around Luna’s. “I’m okay.”
“Is this about our last meeting?”
“Um…” Sunset rubbed her hands together where they were sandwiched between her thighs. “It’s…related, I guess, but not…not like, um, a…”
“Not a direct continuation.”
Sunset nodded again.
Luna nodded in turn. She didn’t react further at first, though after a few moments she lifted her chin off her hands and sat back in her chair, hands remaining before her as they slid a bit more together and lowered onto the desk to rest there. “I’ve said it before, but I feel it’s worth repeating: I am on your side, Sunset. It’s my job.”
“It’s…not.” Sunset almost didn’t finish that thought, but she continued it. “It’s not, though. I’m not a student. I’m not your responsibility.”
Luna’s response came with a two second delay. “Perhaps,” she finally said, carefully. Her tone was close to guarded, but not quite. “Perhaps if you were to peruse my contract as vice principal, you’d find this to be the truth, but this isn’t about contracts or legally-binding obligations.”
“What’s it about, then?” Sunset was sitting forward a bit now, hands in her lap as she looked at Luna intently. “What reason could you even have to want to help me, much less throw effort into it?”
Luna looked at Sunset with some manner of deliberation in her gaze. After a few moments, she asked her: “Is it really so odd to choose the path of compassion when given the choice, Miss Shimmer?”
“It is when you could get in some pretty deep shit over it. Like, I-“ Sunset put a hand to her chest, momentarily looking for the right words for this. “I tried to kill people. Your people. People you’re responsible for. All the rest I took over the minds of, with every intention of marching them into battle in another world. I wouldn’t have thought twice about any number of them dying, if I got what I wanted out of it. I took control of you, even.”
“I am aware of what transpired,” Luna replied coolly.
She nearly stopped, but Sunset pushed with the last of the inertia she’d built up through this conversation: “Then why would you want to help me? What possible reason could you have to want to be on my side in…in anything, honestly? Why are you covering for me when I attacked you?”
Luna’s jaw set. It wasn’t dramatic, but her expression shifted to something akin to displeasure. She remained like that for a few seconds, processing, and after that the displeasure bordered something like bother, which historically was not a great expression for Luna to have when you were on the other side of the table from her. A few moments later she brought one hand to her face, kneading the bridge of her nose between index finger and thumb as she breathed a quiet breath through her nose.
Sunset waited, though not without fidgeting. This wasn’t the conversation she’d intended to have, but now that she was here, she did want to know this. “It just doesn’t make sense to me. You’re doing a lot for me already, and no one’s that selfless.”
“Indeed,” Luna admitted, sounding nearly reluctant as she said it. She kneaded the bridge of her nose for another few moments before she brought her hand down from her face, leveling her gaze at Sunset once more. “Very well, Miss Shimmer. But if I’m to tell you, I’d like it to be in the spirit of openness between the two of us. Is that fair?”
Sunset didn’t know how else to reply but with a nod.
“Fine.” Luna stared through Sunset for a few moments, then nodded as though in affirmation to herself. She still didn’t seem entirely enthusiastic to be saying what she took in a breath to, but it didn’t stop her from sharing all the same: “I confess that it’s not wholly benevolence that inspired my willingness to aid. Not to start, at least. My sister and I had and still have questions we’ve no clear ways to answer, and among them how deep this mess goes, now that it’s landed in our lap. The Fall Formal event represented confirmed first contact with a foreign power from…” Luna hesitated, rolling her wrist with something vaguely akin to dismissiveness, “From beyond the veil? From another dimension? A parallel universe?”
“Parallel universe,” Sunset muttered. “It’s…close enough.”
“Parallel universe, then.” Luna’s chair creaked quietly as she sat back in it, arms folded loosely over her chest. “It’s very apparent this Equestria you hail from wields immense power that we can scarcely understand, and we…I will admit, we panicked.” Luna looked off across the room towards the window as she continued to frown. “We panicked and covered it up. It was the wrong move, but we succeeded, and we got away with it. Upon further consideration and deliberation of what happened, it’s apparent - to me, at least - that whatever powers that be in your realm have little if any interest in reaching out to us on this side of your…portal.”
“Have you gathered that I’m a traitor to my people yet?”
Luna inspected Sunset for a few moments, then nodded. “We’ve gathered something like it, yes.”
“So you know Equestria doesn’t support me.”
Luna nodded. “Yes.”
“And yet you continue to shield me from scrutiny.”
Luna nodded again.
Sunset regarded her for a moment, then let out a quiet scoff as cynicism set in. “So what was the plan, exactly? Buddy-buddy up with me so…what, I’ll cover your ass against anyone who comes in through that portal? Keep me close so you can throw me to the wolves if the government figures out you bucked up?”
Luna’s eyes narrowed. “We’ve no plan to sacrifice you, Miss Shimmer, and I’d appreciate it if you abandoned such notions.”
Sunset wasn’t wholly convinced, but she didn’t push it. Instead, she opened her arms expectantly. “What, then? What is it you want from me?”
“Precisely the conversation we are having now: openness and mutual disclosure.”
“So...answers.”
“We did have questions,” came the measured response, “and if you were willing to answer them, it would be appreciated. Several of them stand to make us feel much more secure to know the truth of…and,” she admitted, head dipping ever so slightly as she said it, “maybe a little safer as well.”
Sunset’s gaze fell to her lap, and she found herself with a short-lived rueful smile on her lips as she shook her head. Something about what was said left an ache in her heart, though she couldn’t pin down why in the moment. “Ask, then.”
Luna contemplated this as she sat there, and after a few seconds she came to a decision. “Well,” she started, “of all the questions that stand out to me, chief among them is…” She splayed her hands slightly as she asked, “What comes next?”
“With?”
Luna merely shrugged as she folded her hands together. “Anything. The Fall Formal incident happened, and…now what? What does the future look like in the wake of what transpired?”
Sunset licked her chapped lips as she inspected her lap. Truth be told, that was something she hadn’t spent a great deal of time considering herself. She’d simply accepted her fate and didn’t much mind what that meant, because it didn’t matter what happened to her. “Well…um…”
“We haven’t noticed anyone coming or going through the portal since Twilight Sparkle left us.”
Sunset nodded silently. She thought for a little while longer after that, then sighed and shook her head as she sat back in her chair. “I wouldn’t expect anything to happen from here. Equestria is a bit of an isolationist state, and…I mean,” she chuckled humorlessly, “it’s not like I’m gonna get a chance to pull anything a second time. That portal probably leads straight into a firing line stationed there at all hours after what I did.”
Luna pressed her lips into a thin, worried line. “I’m concerned about the students.”
“Don’t be,” Sunset said quickly. She’d only realized what she’d implied for their safety after she’d said what she did. “Don’t be, it’s- I’m the traitor here, not- you guys didn’t- you did nothing wrong. It wouldn’t be like-“ She made a snap decision not to name-drop either diarch. “-it wouldn’t be like Equestrian leadership to be like that for no reason. Anybody besides me would get turned around. Maybe hit with a like- like a short amnesia spell, just make them forget what happened when they went through. Something like that.”
This did some to assuage her, though Luna didn’t look completely at ease. “How confident are you in this?”
“Very.” Sunset’s tone was resolute, though as she went on, the certainty waned. “I was um…I have extensive training in matters of state in Equestria. Maybe not all the minutia, but certainly the…the tone, certainly, is very familiar to me. Close to heart. I know what Equestria stands for, and it’s not callous brutality.” She inhaled as her gaze strayed to one side, then breathed out, “As ironic as that sounds, coming from me.”
Luna’s expression was neutral as she observed Sunset for a few moments. “Are you, perchance…some manner of leadership, where you’re from?”
”I am.” A few beats passed, followed by a low correction of, “…was. I’m…I was, I mean…heir apparent. Before I failed.”
She’d thought the words many times, but this was the first time they’d ever met her ears. Each word of it stung, but that last one hurt like nothing else. It was like the knife in her chest she'd never quite pulled out twisted, re-opening the wound and letting her experience it all over again.
Sunset had meant to say more, but she found her voice drying up and her eyes unable to leave her hands where she wrung them together in her lap. Her eyes prickled with unformed tears as she sat forward, arms on her knees, looking squarely down at her hands and nowhere near Vice Principal Luna. Didn’t want to see her. Didn’t want to be seen.
The vice principal, meanwhile, was silent. For the longest time Vice Principal Luna said nothing, gazing down at Sunset Shimmer with an unreadable expression. Even as Sunset’s barely audible sniffles disturbed the absolute silence like distant ripples on a still lake, Luna’s stoicism was unmarred. Her presence was as unyielding as it was gentle, like a stone guardian overlooking the valley it had been fashioned to stand sentinel over so many years ago.
She spoke without warning, but the tone could never startle: “You are in ruin.”
Sunset could only just bring herself to nod. She sniffled again, though the only tear that had managed to gather was swiped away before it could slip down her cheek. The shame sat heavy on her shoulders, and every breath had to be toiled for beneath it.
The vice principal nodded at something that wasn’t said. She observed Sunset for a little while longer before her gaze shifted to the side, finding some far corner of the room as she looked past it and off into the distance. “I know what it’s like.”
Sunset didn’t say anything. Luna didn’t wait for her to.
“My closest friend in my younger years was my anger. Sometimes it was righteous. Most times it was…not.” Luna shook her head slowly, like she was watching the shadows of this office play the memories out before her eyes. “I was expelled in my junior year of highschool for my behavior. Four years and many ever-deepening mistakes later, I was sentenced to ten years in prison for a crime I was very much guilty of.” Luna paused, soberly staring off into the distance, her voice low and even. “I had thoroughly damaged my relationship with my family by that point, and what few interactions I was spared during my sentence only served to further strain my familial ties until they broke. When I was released, no one welcomed me home. I was not taken in by anyone, and when I did finally manage to contact my family again, I learned that my father had died four years into my sentence. I was six years too late to apologize to him for anything I'd done, and just as late to say goodbye.”
Sunset rubbed at one eye with the back of her hand with another sniffle. She didn’t know what else to do with herself but to listen.
“To have to pick one’s self off the ground with nothing to their name but loss…” Luna shook her head somberly, teal eyes unfocused still. There were clearly words on her lips, hanging there ethereally, but she did speak them. The ghost of regret hung heavy over Luna’s expression, and for a time she was lost to her reminiscence.
Sunset, meanwhile, continued to listen. The vice principal wasn’t speaking, but it felt like there was a lot being said in the silence that stretched on for well over a minute. She’d learned a lot about what silence could say over the last few months, and there was a lot to hear right now. Things that few people had likely ever stopped to hear.
The silence told Sunset that Vice Principal Luna was a storied woman. Many of her stories were not happy ones. Perhaps they ended well, or at least culminated into something that could be called positive, but the journey that brought her to where she sat in this office had at times been harrowing. Judging by how she kept said office, perhaps her journey was not entirely over yet.
Finally, the spell over Vice Principal Luna broke. Her eyes fell back into focus, and she took in a long, slow breath that she released back out as a sigh. “The point I mean to make is that I know a thing or two about making mistakes, Sunset. Costly mistakes. You and I have both made choices that we will feel the consequences of for the rest of our lives. The only difference-” She turned her chair where it had swiveled slightly so as to more directly face Sunset, “-is that much of my pain is in the past, and yours is very much in the present. I know what it’s like, and to have to bear that burden alone is…” She shook her head, sympathy in her every movement. “That is not a fate I would wish on anyone.”
Sunset didn’t know what to say. She had yet to sit up, and though the tears weren’t building anymore, her thoughts felt almost soupy in composition. Her throat was tight, and words felt so far away from where she was seated.
“Were I to offer to help you, would you accept?”
It was a simple question, but one that took Sunset a not insignificant amount of time to find the words for. “Maybe.” She almost couldn’t hear herself say it, and she had to clear her throat before she could try to repeat it. “Maybe.”
Luna nodded, slowly. “Why do you hesitate?”
Sunset swallowed, licking her lips a little. She raised her head up, though not enough to look at Luna directly. Her hands were much easier to focus on. “I don’t know what you could do for me.”
“I have a variety of means available to me. However, I think the question best asked here is what kind of help you need most.”
This was the point that Sunset figured would come eventually. It was something she had thought about quite a bit before she set foot in this office that morning, but in spite of that she found herself face to face with the matter of being candid with her situation to Luna as though it had snuck up on her, and she had to consider it all over again like it was a fresh new idea she’d only just thought up. It wasn’t actually untrodden ground, so navigating it wasn’t quite so daunting nor arduous, but it still demanded some thinking through.
Eventually, she reached the only conclusion that she felt made sense: what did she have to lose? This was one of her few options regardless, and Luna seemed like she not only understood, but sympathized. It wouldn’t get any better than that.
Sunset took in a breath, tried to ignore how her heart was beating a little faster, and looked up at Luna to just say it: “I need a place to stay.”
Luna’s expression remained largely neutral, though a subtle furrowing of her brow could be seen if one watched her face closely. “Do you not have a place you are staying?”
Sunset bobbed her head back and forth with pursed lips in a show of ‘yes and no.’ She rubbed her hands together in an attempt to find an outlet for her nervous energy. “It’s technically shelter, but it’s…it won’t last me through winter. It's already rough. I um…I’ve been- I’ve got someone that I’m going to start, um, staying with over the weekends, but her parents…like, she knows, but her parents don’t, and it’s…” She fumbled a little bit, then settled with a side-cast look and a somewhat lame, “Yeah.”
“Is this a fellow student?”
Sunset hesitated as she was faced with the need to protect Fluttershy. She was silent for a few moments, then eventually replied, “Yes.”
Luna nodded thoughtfully. “May I ask who it is?”
Again Sunset was faced with the thought of protecting Fluttershy, and this time she clenched her jaw shut as she bit on the inside of her lower lip.
Luna waited. When she was met with silence, she patiently reminded, “I understand the value of discretion, Sunset, but I want to help you. If there are others who also want to help you, I have every reason to want to help them as well. Collaboration can only benefit us.”
Sunset nodded, if a little stiffly. She had since concluded that she could probably trust Luna, but “probably” was not "definitely," and that did not seem good enough. Sunset would take no risks, regardless of how unlikely they were. “I’d like to keep that to myself for right now.”
A small frown tugged at Luna’s lips. She considered this, then sighed an acquiescing, “Very well. Such caution is not necessary, but it is at your discretion. Regardless…” The vice principal sat back in her seat, which creaked under her shifting weight. “The matter of shelter should be resolved as soon as possible. Have you considered making use of local homeless shelters to at least take the edge off of this matter?”
Sunset shook her head. “I don’t have identification. Even if I got it, that’s a link back to this world’s Sunset Shimmer that doesn’t add up. Big loose end.”
“Right.” Luna seemed to pause to process something, then went on. “...yes, that is a…concern.”
“I also can’t get a job, because, y'know…same issue.”
Luna nodded along. “It is possible to land you with employment, of a sort, but that invites other problems, such as lack of protections that you especially would need, given your circumstances. Representation is a luxury that…hm.” Luna tapped her chin, expression becoming increasingly thoughtful as the full breadth of the matter began to make itself apparent to her as she explored it. “This is quite the puzzle we have here, isn’t it?”
Sunset resisted the urge to sigh. She’d navigated these mental gymnastics many times in the past four years, and at no point had her prospects ever been what she’d describe as bright. Revisiting them didn’t bring a great deal of joy, even if doing so with someone else did feel kind of good. “Turns out human society doesn’t really have much to offer someone who doesn’t belong in it. Fancy that.”
“Fancy that indeed,” came the absent reply. Luna was silent for a short time as her focus turned inward at navigating this conundrum, though eventually she left it off with a dissatisfied frown and a bothered sigh. “...not something that can be resolved here and now, I fear. And I still have work to do…” At this, Luna’s eyes flicked to the watch on her wrist. Her dissatisfaction visibly grew at what she saw. “Classes will be starting soon. We are quickly running out of time this morning, Miss Shimmer.”
Sunset gave a helpless shrug. “There’s a lot to this. I wasn’t expecting…” A beat. “...well. Anything, honestly. I didn’t have a plan.”
“And while admittedly I don’t have one either, this can be resolved, and I have every intention of resolving it. How dire is your housing situation right now?”
Sunset only considered this. She didn't want to speak positively of her living situation, given that...you know, it was unsustainable and she had quickly grown to hate it now that she'd had a taste of proper living, but she also didn't necessarily want to ascribe urgency to how bad it was. It sucked, but it wasn't killing her. Quickly, anyway. “I’m kinda fine? I’m…I’m working it out.”
“Well what’s important to me right now is that you’re safe and healthy. I can potentially have something ready for you by tonight if you have no alternatives.”
Sunset wasn’t sure how she felt about that. Would it be better than sleeping in her awful little home she had? Yeah, probably. Was that something she wanted to leap on, though? “I’ll…see. I’ll see about it. Let me take stock of things.”
“Very well.” Luna briefly considered something, then opened her desk drawers until she found both a pen and a piece of paper, which she placed on the desk in front of her and scribbled something on before she pushed it across the desk for Sunset, revealing it to be a series of numbers. A phone number. “This is for my non-work phone. Let me know how things look for tonight when you can, and we can go from there.”
Sunset accepted the paper. She looked at it for a moment as she mentally took stock of the situation, then how to proceed now that their meeting seemed to be concluding. “Alright…so, what, we just kinda like…we like, go back to normal after this?”
“Maintaining appearances would be wise, yes.” Luna started to say something else, though she stopped and winced like she’d gathered static discharge and shocked herself on her desk. “...the absence thing. We didn’t cover that.”
Sunset had, frankly, forgotten about that. It took her a moment to recall that conversation and why it was significant - something about big wigs on the board of education maybe one day sniffing out how Sunset was a delinquent and wasn’t being smote for it. “...dooooo we need to fix that like, now now, or..?”
“I wouldn’t call it urgent,” Luna said carefully, “but it is something I think it would be prudent to work out a solution for all the same. Maintaining appearances will be the operative phrase for this and several things…” Her face slowly grew into a pre-emptive wince. “...and I do fear that one of our best bets will end up being detention.”
Sunset rolled her eyes as an explosive sigh burst out of her. “Really? We’re gonna get all the way into this thing about working together and extenuating circumstances and all this shit, and then you’re gonna turn around and stick me in detention? Really?”
“It would look very normal. I’ll look into something more graceful, but…” Luna’s voice was as much an apologetic grimace as her expression was. “Sorry in advance.”
At this Sunset could only throw her head back, run her hands through her bangs, and groan. The worst part was that she couldn’t decide whether or not it was funny, and as she sat there admiring what a stupid situation this was, some wry chuckles forced their way up her throat while she shook her head. “Amazing.”
Luna offered a sympathetic if helpless smile in response. She cast another glance at her wrist watch, let the matter lie for a few more moments, then informed Sunset, “I’m afraid we’re out of time.”
Sunset let a lingering grumble of a sigh roll out of her throat for a few seconds more before she sat forward, standing up out of her chair. “What a note to leave off on.”
“Quite.” Luna stepped out from behind her desk and opened the door to her office, holding it open for Sunset. “We’ll be in contact.”
“Yeah, for sure…alright.” As Sunset stepped out the door, she paused for a moment, then looked back over her shoulder and gathered up as much sincerity as she could find in herself right then. As it turned out, it was quite a lot. “And…thank you. Really.”
A soft smile found its way onto Luna’s face. “Some things in this world are simply worth doing, Sunset. This is one of them.”
Sunset left the vice principal’s office to make her way back out the front door to talk to Fluttershy, only to meet her in the hall on her way to first period that was minutes away from starting. There was a lot to catch her up on, so while she only could report the gist of it in the time they had, the words flowed out of her with an unprecedented excitement that she could barely contain.
For the first time in a long time, it felt like there was potential for a way forward. They hadn’t found it yet, and there were a lot of variables that had to be navigated, but things were happening. Solutions were out there. More than that, now there were multiple people onboard with her with the collective intention of trying to make her situation more bearable, and even sustainable.
Things could improve. Things were already improving. A spark of hope spit and danced and in her chest like a sparkler, and all she wanted to do was dance with it.
Sunset Shimmer all but skipped down the hallway that morning. Even the thought of detention seemed petty to her as she made her way down to first period to start off the school day.
Maybe things were going to be okay after all.
Sunset Shimmer had never actually been to detention until she ‘attended’ Canterlot High School in the human world. She’d been suspended a handful of times in Equestria, mostly in middle school, but that was because suspension and detention both were used for very different purposes there.
In Equestria, detention was usually reserved for students that had fallen heavily behind on their assignments due to negligence or defiance, and those students were effectively picked up by the scruff and had their nose applied to the grindstone for an extra hour or two after school or during lunch. This was to hammer it in their head that not every hour could be a free hour and that duties were not for if you felt like it. Equestrian detention was strictly about school performance and work ethic, and if there were issues in school like behavior or other such problems, those matters were brought directly to the family, where the problem could be discussed by all parties and a plan of action could be devised. Meanwhile, suspension was not used as punishment. It followed close behind a plan of action being devised instead, namely one that required a student attend something that would normally occupy class hours, and oftentimes the student’s family would directly participate in the process. Schools worked closely with families to make sure that their children were succeeding, and if they weren’t, then it was up to them to do something about it together. It was for the foals.
The disciplinary actions taken by the schools in the human world didn’t make much sense to Sunset by comparison. There was an element of work management involved in that assignments and study were some of the few things you were allowed to do in detention, but the reasons for being assigned detention could vary wildly and sometimes had nothing to do with how the student was doing in school beyond whether or not they were acting out. Basically, if the student was in violation of school policy but not in a particularly severe way, they got detention. If they violated school policy in a more severe way, they’d be suspended, but there was seldom follow-up from what Sunset could tell. Granted she was looking from the outside and had never actually been a part of that process, but the schools in general seemed very loath to involve the families of the errant student in any way other than to inform them that they were indeed errant, meanwhile allowing the ever-present implication that the family could be held responsible for this if it got bad enough to prompt them to do something without themselves doing anything more than they were required to.
As far as Sunset could see, the entire philosophy for school in the human world was one of the things that the mirror realm’s properties had inverted rather than reflected. Whereas Equestria treated schooling and education as a matter of moral imperative that represented its own reward when done right, the human world regarded it as a necessary but burdensome expense that had to continually be justified by meeting whatever arbitrary standard they’d set as justification. Weirdly, however, humans talked like they regarded it the same way ponies did, but the manner that the institutions composed themselves in told a very different story from the one everyone seemed to believe. It was like the perspective was reflected as most things were, but the reality was inverted out from under it and no one seemed to notice the disconnect.
Sunset had not seen another situation like it since passing through the portal. It was fascinating, but also deeply concerning. The relationship between Equestria itself and the education system of the human world was very intimate for some reason, and while it was almost impossible to know the specifics with so much of the world’s inner workings hidden from view, there stood a not-insignificant possibility that the situation with the human world’s schools was a commentary of Equestria rather than a perversion of it. That, of course, was almost unthinkable to Sunset. It went against everything she understood about Equestria’s values, yet the amount that it made sense based on what she knew was enough to inspire a quiet existential fear that she could never bring herself to fully shake.
Was it some quirk that emerged through the reflection process to represent the differences between the two peoples on either side of the mirror? Or was this the natural consequence of distilling a greater picture down into something more easily comprehensible, where something dark and cold beneath the ostensibly bright and enlightened surface of pony society could be plainly seen? Was this a technical oddity with a self-contained explanation, or a side view of a conspiracy back home no one had caught onto yet? Was it a coincidental glitch, or a pointed truth?
Sunset may be a traitor, but she was also a patriot, and it was for this reason that these questions sometimes haunted her. What did it all mean, and more importantly, what did it mean for Equestria? What did it mean for equinity? Did it mean something? If so, what? What did it mean? What did it mean?
The loud slap of a pile of papers being dropped on the table directly beside Sunset was enough to make her nearly jolt out of her seat. She barely had time to register what had happened when Ms. Harshwhinny pushed several papers from the pile directly in front of Sunset, meeting her wide-eyed stare with her own stern one. There was seldom much warmth to be found in that woman, but in this instance her gaze felt especially glacial. “If you have time to daydream, you have time to work, Miss Shimmer.”
Without so much as a moment’s pause, the older woman picked up the pile of papers she’d slammed down and began to pass by each of the tables evenly spread throughout the room. A single student sat at each table, all facing the front of the very empty-feeling art classroom. Every student here remained silent, just like they had for the last half hour, and while the fleeting edges of glances cast Sunset’s way were caught out of the corner of her eye as she looked around, each set of eyes left her well before their thoughts could be gleaned. No one wanted to be seen looking anywhere but down at where they were working.
After a few moments like this, Sunset looked down as well, regarding the papers that had been put in front of her with an expression that would eventually metamorphose into a scowl. All these words and the empty fields beneath them served no purpose other than to occupy her and to distract from things that actually mattered, and what else could she be but frustrated by this? Her time was being wasted. There was so much else she could do with the time and energy she had, and she was being forced to squander it with punitive busywork.
This was either symbolic or frivolous, and Sunset wasn't sure which one left a worse taste in her mouth. She shook her head in silent disgust, then picked up the pencil where it had scattered from her hand to partake in the useless activities she had been assigned, if for no other reason than to keep Harshwhinny from jumping fist-first down her throat again.
Sunset hated detention. She disliked the way it was executed in this world in particular, but having it be run by a renowned hardass that had taken a distinct disliking towards her in particular left Sunset at a low simmer that could only run hotter as time passed.
It was decided that there would be words with Luna after this. She didn’t know what words specifically, but there would be them, if Sunset got her way.
And indeed she would. After the rest of the hour passed and Sunset was able to collect her things and make a swift retreat from the art room, she stalked the halls with purpose in her stride until she caught a glimpse of deep blue and the aura of someone who could move heaven and earth with the proper motivation. Unlike most other times she’d see that approaching her, Sunset swiveled on her heel from where she’d been turned and marched straight at the vice principal like a heat-seeking missile.
Before the vice principal could get a word in edgewise to address this, Sunset stabbed a finger in the vague direction of the art room a few halls down and demanded with civility stretched so thin it was transparent, “Hey, so, what was that?”
Luna paused to observe Sunset for a moment, making extensive note of the way smoke was all but literally coming out of her ears, then replied evenly: “Detention.”
“No shit!” The taut civility snapped completely, both halves ricocheting off the walls to the sound of Sunset’s snarl.
“Lower your voice,” Luna demanded sternly, then followed her own advice. “And don’t be so crass at me. You were told what to expect.”
“Yes but- but-” Sunset did manage to bring herself to lower her voice, but only by a notch. She mouthed and gesticulated vaguely as she tried to wrangle her outrage enough to form words, and when she did she stabbed both hands in the direction of the art room across the building. ”Harshwhinny?!”
“-was necessary for the purposes of controlling the rest of the room,” Luna filled in after her. “Besides, what was I meant to do? I can’t very well get anything done if I need to keep one eye on six other students with a history of delinquency.”
Sunset went to say something else, but stopped herself. She physically swallowed as she metaphorically swallowed the embers she was so eager to spit, and she had the wherewithal to cast a quick glance around them to ensure no one was actively listening before she stepped a little closer in a more hushed, if still smoldering voice. “That was not what I had in mind when we talked about this. That woman is a cunt, and that’s before she decided she hates me, and if maintaining appearances means I gotta keep dealing with her ass, I think I might prefer taking my chances with whatever dickhead your education board throws at me.”
“That’s-” Luna cut herself off and closed her eyes briefly, grasping her patience a little more firmly with a measure inhale through her nose. “I’ll arrange something more agreeable when I have a chance, Sunset, alright? I understand the frustration, but helping you has proven to be no small task, and I do still have a job to do here.” The edge in Luna’s voice was not sharp, but it was enough to catch if one wasn’t careful. “I can’t do everything all at once. Please be patient.”
Sunset huffed, and in her mind’s eye a plume of black smoke came out through her mouth and nostrils when she did. From there she was able to curb the temptation to say something biting enough to instead merely grunt, “Fine.”
“Thank you.” It was at this point that Luna resumed a normal speaking voice. “Now go to my office. I need to take care of something, and I’ll be with you when I’m done.”
Sunset nodded wordlessly and stepped around the vice principal to do precisely that.
But first, a detour. A nice winding circuit through the halls before she eventually made her way to the vice principal's office sounded rather agreeable to Sunset right then. It would be nice to have a chance to stretch her legs after having been more or less tied to a chair with a Harshwinny-shaped gun pointed at her head for an hour. Her fellow detentionmates had scattered to the wind the moment freedom presented itself, and with it being an hour after everyone else had already gone home, there would be little in the way of other bodies to be concerned with.
…on the topic of bodies, Sunset pulled her phone out of her pocket and flicked to her texts as she power-walked through the hallways. She’d gotten a text from Rarity earlier and had managed to glimpse only the fact that there was a preview, which betrayed the existence of an image file present. That was almost always a good thing.
Sure enough, without any witnesses to have to be concerned with, Sunset opened up the latest instance of self-photography from Rarity, timestamped just shy of 20 minutes ago.
The photo was of Rarity, phone raised at a mirror that had used to capture the whole of her from across the room. She was sitting on the edge of a countertop by a sink in what appeared to be a particularly cramped bathroom, and judging by her outfit, it had been taken at her workplace. Her uniform was most definitely not in a work-compliant state, however; her button-down shirt was around her waist where it had been pulled open let slip from her shoulders, and just barely visible behind her was one strap of her bra, which was most pointedly not anywhere on her body. Her black skirt was hitched up and one leg was propped up on the toilet, which left her legs open and her underwear clearly visible. Her face was covered up with the phone where it had been raised, but from what little Sunset could make of the way the muscles on her face were pulled, it was clear to her that when Rarity had taken the picture, she’d been grinning.
Immediately after the picture had been sent, a text had followed:
Rarity
Now see, that? That was a sight for sore eyes. Sunset broke into a grin herself, one that would no doubt match Rarity’s behind that phone when she sent it.
Something about viewing pictures like this in the open in school was…weird. And kind of funny. Sunset saved the selfie and was then typing up a reply of her own, 20 minutes late though it was:
You
That would have to do. She’d be working right now, so a timely response wasn’t likely. This would probably make her smile, though, so it was good enough.
She was getting bolder with her photos - bold enough to be a bit more explicit and revealing in these exchanges. There was the obvious reason why this could be viewed as a good thing, but Sunset was also pleased by this for other reasons. Rarity was getting bolder, which meant she was feeling more comfortable and confident with her body, and that was a major contributor to the smile on Sunset’s face right then as she walked. Good for her, well and truly.
That was nice. That was really nice, actually. A nice palette cleanser after the grueling Harshwhinny incident.
While she had her phone in her hands, Sunset checked for other texts. She got one from Fluttershy asking if she was going to come over today, to which Sunset replied (if also rather late from when the original text had been sent) that she probably would, once she got free. Ideally that’d be soon. Of all the things that Sunset had expected Fluttershy to have a lot of experience playing, she didn’t think it would be the Street Fighter games, but a fair bit of time lately had been dedicated to showing Sunset the ins and outs of it. She was still pretty trash at it, but it was novel and something fun for them to work together on, and it was something she looked forward to later, even if it did mean she’d probably be getting her ass kicked repeatedly by bots in the main storyline. Whatever, it’d be fine.
The sound of a locker firmly closing ahead made Sunset’s head snap upward away from her phone. Her route through the halls had brought her to the locker segment that one of the kids from detention had just pulled their bag from and was now staring at her, leaning on her locker with the arm she’d just used to close it.
The name escaped Sunset - Water-something. Drama kid. Skin like strawberry-flavored yogurt. Short, violently green hair. Wearing one of those round flat hats from a place she couldn’t think of the name of, nor the hat...beret or something. Purple-pink eyes. Someone she’d had no use for in her scheming days and continued to have no use for now.
”What’s it like to be mortal again, Shimmer?”
It wasn’t obvious by the tone whether it was meant belligerently or not, but the body language wasn’t friendly, which told Sunset to put her phone in her pocket and direct her eyes straight ahead. She resumed walking and had no intention of stopping.
This didn’t seem to dissuade Water-something. “Took ‘em long enough to finally catch you on something.”
As Sunset passed, she dismissively replied, “I’m not caught yet.”
Water-something let out a derisive snort at this. Sunset didn’t look, so she couldn’t see her expression. ”Looking pretty caught to me.”
Sunset didn’t respond. She kept walking, and Water-something neither said more nor pursued. The conversation with the first of her peers that wasn’t a Rainboom in four months ended as suddenly as it started.
Sunset didn’t know how to feel afterwards. She tried not to think about it, nor the barely detectable quiver of nausea in her stomach after the fact.
Sunset cut her intended circuit through the halls in half to get to Luna’s office faster. Once she arrived, she closed herself in the shaded room that was illuminated only by the ribbons of light filtering in through lowered blinds. It was barely enough to find her seat by, even with the midday sun just outside.
As she was sitting there in the dark trying to empty her thoughts, Sunset’s phone vibrated in her pocket. She retrieved it and checked her latest text.
Rarity
Sunset’s lips cracked into a small smile.
You
Unexpectedly, Rarity responded before Sunset could lower the phone again.
Rarity
Definitely work-texting. Sunset didn't think much of it at the time, however. She missed Rarity, and now Rarity was here. She was just happy to talk to her.
You
Rarity
You
Rarity
You
Rarity
Sunset’s smile had only grown throughout this conversation, and it showed no sign of letting up any time soon.
You
Rarity
Youwould you like to see, oh divinely beloved of mine?
Rarity
It was perhaps far more tempting than it should have been to comply with this. As she was seriously debating following through with what might not have even been intended as an earnest request, the consideration of making her way to the school bathroom was cut short by the sound of the door handle turning and the vice principal’s office door opening.
What tragic timing.
You
Luna’s expression was often hard to read, and the dark room did not help this as she stepped in and shut the door behind her. “Apologies for the delay,” she said, tone slanted ever so slightly towards something like weariness.
Sunset simply shrugged and crossed one leg over the other, betraying nothing of her thoughts. Her phone went to her pocket, where she tried to sequester the feelings she’d been having up till now. Her pocket buzzed shortly after, but she didn’t check it. Business before pleasure.
Luna opened and closed some desk drawers, somehow able to navigate their contents and do something Sunset couldn’t see - it was impressive that the vice principal could, even without the desk in the way. Eventually she’d placed everywhere where she intended to and the relative quiet was punctuated by paper hitting the desk. Sunset could just see the notebook, but the lamp for Luna’s office clicked on a moment later, letting her see it and about half the now orange-tinted room fully.
As Sunset was about to ask, Luna spoke. “I’ve been compiling my thoughts on everything and considered available options since we last spoke.” She’d retrieved a pencil by now, and the well-filed lead tapped twice on the paper in front of her, which Luna began scanning over like a student trying to work out a particularly trying answer on a test. “Your situation is…tricky.”
Sunset could only nod. This wasn’t news.
“I cannot claim to know what precisely the federal government would do were they to catch wind of who and what you are, but it is wholly out of our hands and could be anything from a polite conversation to…something a little more unthinkable.” She tapped a few spots on the paper as though going down a list. “Much as I’d like to hope compassion would prevail, we have to assume the worst. Detection by the state must be avoided at all costs.”
This also wasn’t news, and Sunset resisted the urge to roll her eyes for it.
“In saying that, every interaction with society that presents an opportunity to fact check is a risk.” Luna turned a page in her notebook, focused intently on the orderly notes that had been sketched all over its surface. “This all comes back to the fact that - as you made mention of in our last meeting - this world already has a Sunset Shimmer.”
Sunset finally couldn’t contain the sarcasm. “Who I’m sure is living a full and happy life right now.”
At that, Luna reached for her pocket. “Funny you should mention that. She’s been missing for three years.”
That got Sunset’s attention, and she couldn’t keep the surprise out of her voice. “Has she?”
Luna nodded as she scanned what she had brought up on her own smartphone. “Reported missing in August, 2010.” She turned her phone around and showed Sunset the screen: a particularly youthful-looking version of her human self beamed back at her with a vibrant smile, the image marred by the wrinkles of the laminated missing person’s poster that had been stapled to what looked like a telephone pole. The text on the poster was written from the perspective of the family, presumably the parents, and it mentioned a suspected runaway and pleaded that any information be brought forward about the whereabouts of their 'little sunshine.' “These are still scattered around in Manehatten right now. As far as I can tell, there’s been no updates.”
Sunset felt several things all at once that pulled into and against one another in an ugly knot. The image of her own human face many years younger than her - a face she had never once worn, yet still managed to be familiar - was uncanny, but that phrase at the end hit her like one of the staples pinning the weathered poster to the pole. The payload of nostalgia entered her body and immediately curdled. It was enough to make her writhe in her chair, and Sunset removed her eyes from the phone in favor of something else in this room. ”…buck, alright then.”
Luna let the matter hang to see what else Sunset had to say on it, which was so far no more than wordless discomfort. Luna observed, then retracted her phone. “The timeline isn’t perfect, but I could not help but note a certain familiarity about the whole situation.”
“Sunset Shimmer runs away from home to go do something stupid and avoids detection from the people who would bring her back?” Sunset chuckled dryly, shaking her head. “Yeah, that’s me alright. About what I’d expect.” As she said that, though, something stood out to her, and her brow furrowed. She looked at Luna. “Manehatten, you said?”
“That’s correct. It’s a stretch to say they’re all over the city,” Luna gestured with her phone to indicate, “but these posters are dotted throughout a few different neighborhoods and in front of several businesses that get a lot of foot traffic. I assume there were more at one point, but it’s been three years.”
“But I’ve never been to Manehatten. I was born and raised in Canterlot.”
Luna gave Sunset a look like she didn’t entirely comprehend what she’d said. “...so...it is not just people there are duplicates of in your world, but places as well?”
“Uh…yeah.” Sunset tried to situate herself in her chair a little more snugly where she’d shifted in place out of the optimal comfort zone. Her back still didn’t much favor angles that weren’t orthodox. “The major cities around here are all places that exist in Equestria. And, uh, smaller places too, I assume, but I uh…I don’t get around much.”
The vice principal nodded, visibly straining to digest this information.
“It’s not always one-for-one,” Sunset went on. “But for the most part, there’s a consistent translation of people and places in Equestria which you can see in the human world- and, you know, vice versa. It kinda goes worldwide, I think? I’m not positive though. It doesn’t look like things are quite so spot-on the further out you go from this region in the human world.”
“Earth.”
Sunset blinked. “What?”
“Earth,” Luna repeated. “Our world is called Earth. The planet. We’re on Earth right now.“
“I…I know.” Sunset was taken aback by this enough to almost not know how to reply. “I just call it that. Cuz it’s the…it’s the human world. The world of humans.”
“And your world is Equestria?”
“Equestria is my home country,” Sunset replied slowly, almost carefully. “The world is Equus.”
Luna nodded along and wrote something down in her notebook near the top of the page. “Noted.”
Sunset’s train of thought had been thoroughly derailed by this curveball, so it took her a few seconds to get her head back on straight enough to recall what she’d been saying before. “So uh…yeah.” She cleared her throat and pushed through the awkwardness. “I’ve never been to Manehatten, so...that’s weird.”
“Quite. However, I believe you are in a far better position to discern what that means than I.”
“Right…” The momentum was returning. “Yeah, I…I don’t know that it means anything, I guess. Sometimes it’s one-for-one, the uh, the details between both worlds, but sometimes it’s like…it’s like ballpark similar, you know? More vibes-based than like, directly copied over. No reflection in the mirror is perfect, and..." She waved a hand dismissively. "All that.”
Luna nodded along thoughtfully, adding additional notes to her page. “Fascinating.”
“Yeah.” Sunset hadn’t meant it to sound as flippant as it came off, so she repeated a bit more earnestly. “Yeah, it is. It’s…I think it’s pretty cool. An existential nightmare, maybe, but that’s just part of the cool factor, right?” She chuckled, though it sounded as forced as it was. “Who doesn’t love a little fridge horror in their daily life?”
“Indeed,” came the absent response. Luna stared a bit deeper into her notes, tapping the tip of her pencil pensively against the page, though after a few moments more her posture shifted and the matter was set aside. “The takeaway I meant is that Manehatten is not a good place for you to be right now. I feel lingering there would be a very effective way to attract attention that can’t be afforded.”
Couldn’t argue with that. “Not like I’m swimming in ways to get there, but I’ll go ahead and just blacklist that area on my list of vacation destinations.”
“Wise.” Luna touched her pencil to one point of note in her notebook. “That this world’s Sunset Shimmer is not accounted for does not necessarily make the situation easier, unlike what first glance may suggest. She’s vacated her position in society, so there’s some amount of overlap that can be avoided with your own activity, but there are people with a vested interest in restoring the spot that she left, namely in her household and with law enforcement." Luna's voice picked up a distinctly tepid quality as she went on with, "It’s also a potential solution to your problems, if you like...her parents would likely not be able to immediately discern the difference between you and her, but…”
“I would uh-” Sunset cleared her throat, “-strongly prefer to not do that.”
Luna nodded with certainty. “Good. There’s some ethical hurdles there that I would prefer not to have to navigate myself.”
“Same.” That, and on the list of people she didn't want to see in any world, her parents were very near the top.
Luna looked over her notes for a moment or so longer, then quietly sighed and placed her pencil down. “I’m afraid that even knowing this, the situation has not overmuch changed. Every effort should still be made to avoid bringing your name up in official contexts for the sake of safety, and given the danger questions being raised represents, avenues available to us - even with an elevated level of acceptable risk - are few. It,” and Luna looked to Sunset with an apology on her face, “ultimately comes down to dependency on your peers and neighbors, I’m afraid. Anyone willing and able to keep the secret.”
Sunset had known that. Much like most of what Luna had said here, this wasn’t news. To hear it coming from someone else, however, confirmed what she already knew deep down and cemented its validity in her mind. It felt like a weight was lowering down over her shoulders as some of the last holdouts of vain, stubborn hope finally winked out. She sat back the rest of the way in her chair as a despondent sigh left her.
“I will do some exploration,” Luna assured. “While I can’t say I know people in high places, I do know people, and my sister’s influence is not insubstantial either. I’m confident that between the two of us, we’ll be able to figure out something more sustainable. As it stands…” Luna parted her hands and gave a resigned half-smile that said, ‘it is what it is.’ “Beyond advising you look for sympathy in your classmates and their families, I can offer access to my home, if need be.”
“Iiiiiiii don’t know about that one,” came the quick response. Sunset’s hands raised slightly as though trying to physically keep that one down. “Like- like look, it’s not like I don’t appreciate it, but-“
“It would be easy.” Luna’s voice wasn’t quite hard, but it was unyielding. The stone soldier had planted her sword where she stood. “It would be exceptionally easy to prepare a single space in my home for one girl to rest her head for a night. Repeat instances would be just as easy, if not easier.”
Sunset wanted to refute that, but it was clear in her mind Luna wouldn’t hear her case of being burdensome. She felt a pang of frustration, but also helplessness, and the argument ended before it began with her hands slapping down into her lap with an air of vexation.
“Think about it.” Luna’s voice and stance softened. “That is all I am asking: think about it. My door is open to you.”
Sunset nodded somewhat stiffly, and in the moment her gaze felt best suited for something else besides the woman at her desk. “I’ll think about it.”
Luna gave a nod, and the matter was left at that. After a few moments of quiet, Luna cast a brief glance down at her watch, then returned it to Sunset. “We should consider leaving school at some point today. What do you think?”
“Don’t know what you mean, I’m having a great time.” Sunset couldn’t completely keep the vitriol out of her voice as she stood up. “I love catching up with my best buddy Harshwhinny. Highlight of my bucking day.”
“I’ll arrange for something a bit more bearable,” Luna reminded patiently. “The latest you’ll need to wait will be Monday.”
…suboptimal. That still potentially left Friday, but one more day of the turbobitch was probably survivable. Hopefully whatever Luna intended to orchestrate didn't somehow make the arrangement worse, though it would be a genuinely impressive feat in Sunset's mind if she did. ”Fine I guess.”
“Just hang in there.” Luna rose from her seat - while Sunset didn’t have to, she allowed herself to wait for the vice principal to open the door for her for no other reason than the sake of custom. It seemed proper. “Things will only improve from here.”
Sunset nodded without commentary and stepped out into the hall, hands shifting into her pockets. The door clicked shut behind her, but Sunset’s feet didn’t move yet. Her head fell back a little as she stared up at the spot overhead where the ceiling tiles of the hallway met the wall, letting slip a quiet, weary sigh from her nose.
She was going to need a support network. That much was clear to her: she couldn’t just rely on Fluttershy alone, and even if she decided she did want to lean on her, Luna wouldn’t be enough either. She needed a real support network, and for that, people were going to have to know.
She still didn’t want to. Some part of Sunset - some stupid , petulant part of her that refused to give up the fight despite everything - wanted to keep up the ruse. It wasn't too late to keep it quiet still, and with what she had, she’d be able to coast for a while without doing more. She could still go it more or less alone.
But Sunset Shimmer was tired. She’d been hellbent on giving herself absolutely nothing to work with, and while that part was easy, living with it was hard. She could handle it for a little while, but then the weeks passed, and while they were at it, months passed. She had grit her teeth and dug in her heels and clenched her fists and pulled on all that willpower she was known to have, and it just didn’t matter. She was a rock in a river, and the river was winning. It wasn't a contest; the river would always win.
Sunset didn’t know if she deserved a better life or not, but she was at the point now where she almost didn't care about that. She just wanted the pain to stop. She was tired of suffering.
...she was going to have to tell Rarity about this. She was going to have to tell several people about this. Maybe the other Rainbooms…probably the other Rainbooms, even. They were the only ones who seemed willing to even consider giving her a chance.
…yeah. That’s what it would take. She’d have to do that eventually.
Not now, though. Not today. All Sunset wanted to do today was go to Fluttershy’s house and play Street Fighter, or whatever other games she had on her PS3 that sounded fun. She wanted to call Rarity when she got out of work and pull both girls into a conversation where they weren't doing anything and nothing mattered and tell them stupid jokes that were definitely stupid but her friends thought were funny anyway.
It felt nice to make people laugh. She wanted more of that - more smiles, more laughter. It was nice to leave something good in her wake for once, even if all it amounted to was fleeting little moments of silliness they wouldn't remember in a week.
Making up her mind in that moment that this was what she wanted, Sunset crisply nodded to herself, stood up straighter, and walked down the hall and out the front doors to CHS. She continued to walk as she made her way down the street, took a right, and kept on walking.
There were plenty of things to see in Canterlot, if she at all felt like it, but there’d be no detours and no slowing down today. She had places to be. Normalcy wasn’t going to feel itself, after all.
Lunch time was an old ritual for the students at CHS. The process was simple: get in line, get your slop, and go over to your particular circle’s table in the section of the cafeteria that your particular clique had claimed. For the most part this remained a timeless tradition, though Twilight Sparkle had done some damage to it that could still be seen months later. There was a vague sense of segregation that had endured the princess, but there could be no denying that the amount of overlap between the different cliques was higher than it had ever been.
Sunset’s circle for lunch time had been a specific group of rockers once, though mostly because she was riding off the coattails of Flash Sentry and his friend circle. The table they used to sit at was currently occupied by a mingling of two different groups of rockers and hippies, though the rocker group was not at all the one that used to sit at that table.
Sunset found the whole thing annoying. Yes yes, school unity and all that, team spirit, friendship, blah blah blah- sure, whatever, but why did Twilight have to go mixing up the unofficial lunchtime seating chart? Sunset could never tell who was supposed to be where anymore. You used to be able to find anyone out there so easily by just scanning the sea of faces, but now it felt like a complete crapshoot. Could she not have done something that brought the whole school together in a way that didn’t make lunchtime feel like order had collapsed and chaos reigned?
It was especially inconvenient because Sunset was no longer able to identify at a glance where she needed to avoid. She had a small list of people she felt she needed to steer well clear of, and with no means to find them in a way that didn’t risk meeting their gaze or just standing there making herself particularly conspicuous trying to identify them, Sunset had resigned to just not eating lunch in the cafeteria anymore. She ate in the band room most of the time, or else a hallway with little to no foot traffic that she had to concern herself with. It was lonely, but whatever. Not like anyone wanted to sit with her anyway.
Or at least, so it used to go. These days there were some people who would probably enjoy sitting with her, and while she still didn’t feel bold enough to insert herself into someone else’s territory, every once in a while Sunset found herself tempted by the prospect of finding the table the Rainbooms were at and taking a seat next to Rarity or Fluttershy, just for the company. More trouble than it was worth, probably, but…
Sunset’s fingers tapped rhythmically against the underside of her plastic tray. She’d been standing here too long already. She cast one last look out into the disorganized mob of students eating their lunch, failed to spot either of her friends, sighed, and turned away to slip out the side entrance to the cafeteria with her lunch in hand.
Every once in a while Sunset became convinced that some group of students were going to follow her out and do something nasty to her while she was so kindly isolating herself for them, but it had been months and nothing like that had ever happened. The worst thing that had happened was that a group of students had been about to enter as she exited out the same door, had to stop, and stared at her coldly in silence as she slipped out and away. While there was an optimistic argument to be had about the kids around here being too good to reduce themselves to beating up a bully, the cynic in Sunset was sure that no, they would. They absolutely would. They were just too scared, both of her and of the consequences of violence against other students.
Sunset lowered a shoulder and rammed it into the band room door as she opened it, trying to focus on the stab of pain it caused rather than the negativity spiral she could feel herself inching towards. It worked a little better than she intended, and she grunted and rolled her shoulder as she made her way over to the end-most seat of the semicircle of chairs around the podium.
The lights were off, but the sunlight filtering in through the windows was enough to turn the darkness into gloom. While it wasn’t the most optimal light source available and not something you could exactly read by, it was serviceable enough to do something like eating lunch, if after a few moments of one’s eyes adjusting.
Sunset had spent many lunch periods just like this: squinting in the shade and putting up with the suboptimal conditions. She could have just as easily done this again, but after spending a few moments sitting there, Sunset regarded the dark and found a mote of dissatisfaction where she would have once been complacent. She set her tray down on the chair next to the one she picked and made her way over towards the door to the band room, where a few light switches were waiting for her. With a simple flip of a pair of switches, the darkness was banished, and Sunset went back to her chair to eat in the now fully-lit room.
It wasn’t the best thing she’d ever eaten, but it was food. She got about halfway through the slightly freezer burnt chicken before she decided she was sick of this and wanted some real food to wash it down. She reached for her backpack to open up the lunch Fluttershy packed for her, only to realize she came here without her bag. This discovery was met with a “Buck” under her breath.
Sunset was in the process of mentally backtracking through her steps to figure out where she would have left her bag when there was a creak of the band room door opening. Looking up in surprise, Sunset saw the hat first and identified Applejack before she saw her face, who glanced around until she saw Sunset sitting there. Applejack gave a little smile in greeting and pulled something out of the hall to hold up: Sunset’s backpack. “Ya left this in social studies, sugarcube.”
Sunset was surprised and cautious to see Applejack, but at the sight of her backpack and knowing where she’d left it, a relieved sigh escaped her. An additional potential run-in with Ms. Harshwhinney had been avoided. “Thank you,” she breathed sincerely, standing up to accept the bag as Applejack entered the room to meet her halfway. “I was just wondering where I left it.”
“Well that’s some mighty-fine timin’, ain’t it?”
“Yeah, no kidding.” Sunset considered digging into her bag right then and there, but decided to not reveal her lunch pail just on the off chance that Applejack would recognize it from Fluttershy. “Thanks again.”
“Ain’t no thang, sugarcube.” Rather than leave, however, Applejack glanced around the room, finding Sunset’s meal tray and the rest of the completely empty room. “Bit of a weird place fer lunch, innit though? It’s as quiet as a beehive on a smoke break in here.”
Sunset couldn’t completely restrain the little snort in response to yet another of Applejack’s colorful analogies, though she cleared her throat as she returned to her seat and tried to enforce neutrality in her demeanor. “I uh…I just would prefer to sit by myself at lunch, I guess.”
“You could sit by yerself without scuttlin’ off to the other side of the school, y’know.”
At this, Sunset merely shrugged. She ignored her shoulder’s lingering ache as she picked up her lunch tray and pretended to pick from it. She wasn’t about to ask Applejack to leave, but she was very much waiting for her to.
An awkward silence hung in the air for a little while. Applejack inspected the toe of her boot for a few moments, hands on her hips, before sighing and turning to face Sunset fully with a more sober expression. “…listen, sugarcube, I heard about the whole uh…the Pinkie thing-” she gestured vaguely to indicate in the direction of the lunch room, “-a little while ago, and I just wanted to apologize fer that.”
Sunset looked up to Applejack in surprise. It didn’t take long for her to know what she meant, but she was not expecting to hear of it, much less get an apology for it. “Oh?”
Applejack nodded. “Yeah, there was a whole, uh, to-do about it, and…” Applejack chuckled a little and shook her head. “Ol’ Ponk, smart in brain, ‘n…maybe not so quick in th’ noggin' sometimes. Brilliant girl, she really is, scary smart, but then she goes forgettin’ things like, y’know…peeeeople like their privacy sometimes and maybe don’t wanna go givin’ out where they live fer just anything? Or to just anyone?”
Sunset monitored Applejack’s expression as she said this, less because she was looking for something and more because she was still sort of reeling from hearing this now. After a few moments more, Sunset looked down at the tray in her lap and continued to pick at it. “It’s fine.”
“It’s not,” Applejack insisted adamantly, “and I thought you deserved to hear it. It ain’t fine that ya had to deal with that.” She tilted her head back to peer in the vague direction of what Sunset assumed to be where Pinkie Pie was currently at. “She’s busy bein’ all down in the dumps about it, so it’ll probly be a hot minute till that one works itself out, but…” She trailed off, then shrugged her shoulders. “I figured you should get an apology from someone .”
“Well…” Sunset struggled for words for a few moments, and even when she found them, she felt very on the back foot. “I- it’s not like I handled it super well either, so I’m not gonna pin it to her or anything. And besides, like- like, I don’t wanna have someone beating themselves up about something that happened between us like that. Y’know? Enough shit’s happened, I don’t wanna…I don’t wanna have that.”
Applejack nodded along lightly, though at the mention of enough having happened lately, her nodding became a little deeper and more emphatic. “Yeah, I feel ya. So…” She glanced to the side, uncertain for a moment, then looked back at Sunset as she pointed with her thumb over her shoulder. “You want me to uh- want me to tell ‘er you forgive ‘er, or did you wanna be the one to do that?”
Sunset started answering, though she hesitated before the words could pass through her lips. She thought on it for a few extra moments, then shook her head, eyes once more gravitating towards her lunch tray and its thoroughly fork-stirred contents by now. “I don’t feel comfortable talking to the others yet.”
“Why not, sugarcube?”
Sunset shrugged and continued to mangle her tray’s half-eaten contents with a fork. “I just don’t.”
Applejack regarded this for a time with a troubled expression. There was some clear sign of her wanting to protest this, but she held herself back. “Well,” she eventually conceded, “I ain’t gonna stand here and say who ya should and shouldn’t talk to. I know a lotta stuff must be on yer mind these days, but there ain’t much to worry about with the others, honest. They’re good people, an’ I know you’re seein’ some of that yerself.” Applejack grinned a little. “Rares and Flutters ‘re pretty great, huh?”
Sunset couldn’t completely repress the smile that invaded her face. Unable to keep it down, she turned her head to one side, though when she replied it was sincere: “They are.”
Applejack’s grin widened as she nodded. “Yeah. So…” She looked down briefly, then returned her gaze to Sunset. “…all this to say, it’s yer business who ya decide ya wanna talk to and when, but if you ever decide you wanna give those girls a chance...there's always a spot at our table open for ya, sugarcube. I promise you won't be disappointed.”
Sunset nodded. She didn’t look up, but her gaze shifted to one side as she silently started to digest this. This and other things, too.
Applejack let the silence hang for a while. After some time had passed, she took a single step backwards towards the door. “Guess I should skedaddle. I’ll let Pinkie know there ain’t no hard feelin’s or nothin, if that’s fine by you.”
Sunset nodded. “That’s fine.”
“Aight, cool. Cool…enjoy yer lunch, sugarcube.” Applejack turned to leave, making her way for the door. Halfway there, she stopped and turned around to face Sunset one more time, voice full of sincerity: “An' Sunset? Thanks fer hearin’ me out. You didn’t have to, an’ I appreciate that ya did.”
Sunset glanced up at Applejack as she said this, though rather than have her gaze deflect off of hers like it otherwise would, she managed to bring herself to smile. “Yeah, no problem.”
Applejack returned the smile with a bright and earnest one of her own. She tipped the rim of her hat in farewell, then turned around and pushed open the door to the band room and stepped out into the hall. After a short delay, the door swung closed behind her with a metallic clack.
Sunset remained like that for a while, looking at the door where it had closed. After a while more, her head lowered and her gaze found her meal tray again. Her expression relaxed after Applejack had left, but the ghost of a smile never truly faded from her lips.
Something about that conversation had been uplifting. Sunset couldn’t put her finger on why, exactly, but she felt…lighter. Better, somehow. It was nice.
Sunset spent the remainder of the lunch period reflecting on this feeling as she idly ate from her tray. Once the bell rang, however, she quickly shoved as much remaining food as she could into her mouth without being at risk of choking and hastily vacated the band room. She dropped her tray off in the cafeteria once the largest of the surge of students had passed, then slipped back into the halls and carried on with her day.
Sixth period came, then went. Detention hour started more or less immediately after, and as all the other students began to assemble their things and prepare to catch the bus to go home, the small assortment of detentionees quietly slipped through the crowds to be served their punishment, usually without raising too much attention to themselves.
As Luna had promised, some changes had been made to Sunset’s detention situation. The room she’d be in had been moved, for starters; she would be sitting in what had once been the school’s chemistry lab, back when the school was allowed to use it. Now that it was not, the room had been gutted of virtually everything and stood mostly empty, save for the teacher’s desk, the countertops that couldn’t be moved, and the single table and corresponding chair left out for Sunset.
It was unfortunate in its necessity, because Sunset really liked the art room. It was wide and the number of windows in it kept the room bright throughout the day. Rather than the amount of space in the room making it feel empty, it instead felt open, like you could breathe in there. Something about it inspired thought in Sunset. She would have liked to stay there rather than hang out in the comparatively smaller and barren-feeling ex-chemistry lab, but given the art room had Harshwhinney in it and this one didn’t, it was a worthwhile sacrifice, if still a sacrifice.
Beyond the room change, Sunset also had a change in supervision for her detention period. Luna sat at the head of the room at the teacher’s desk. Her attention was divided between the open laptop at her side and the piles of papers and documents that she had spread out in organized groups all across the desk, which she periodically shifted her focus to as she went about whatever tasks she was busy with.
Sunset wasn’t quite sure how to feel about the situation, at first. Luna was on her side, and this arrangement was meant to be a preferable alternative to the other detention period that she assumed was going on simultaneously. Detention had also always carried with it an aura of severity whenever she’d partaken in it in the human world, however, and Luna wasn’t historically known for being lax about rules and regulations, even as this whole arrangement flew in the face of both. When combined with her isolated position as the focal point of the room, what with being essentially the only thing in it where she sat, Sunset was as inclined to be at ease as she was to be rigid and on guard.
Sunset finished unpacking her school binder of material she could theoretically work on, though rather than do that, she looked at Luna and stared at her, waiting to catch her gaze. That never happened due to Luna failing to look up from her work - that itself could be taken as a sign for how this whole thing was meant to go. It still left a sense of uncertainty, however, so after a while of failing to gain the vice principal’s attention even in passing, Sunset finally spoke up. “…so how are we doing this?”
Luna at last looked up at Sunset. “Pardon?”
“How are we doing this?” Sunset repeated. “Are we like…is this just a front, or am I actually like, under chains here, or…what’s- what’re we doing here? What’s the plan?”
Luna regarded Sunset for a few moments. “The plan,” she began, slowly shifting her attention back to the papers she scratched out something in the awaiting fields, “is that I have a backlog of paperwork I need to have completed before the week is up and need to focus on that. You have an hour to spend as you see fit, though I encourage you to remember that this is meant to be detention.”
“So this is just a cover.”
“Essentially, yes.” It was stated neutrally, though there was a faint arch of bother in Luna’s tone for a brief moment. “Do as you like, but again, recall that this is meant to be detention. We are not the only ones in the building, and it will reflect more on me than you should this masquerade not hold up to scrutiny.”
Sunset nodded, though she didn’t remove her gaze from Luna as she went back to her work. After a few seconds of scrutinizing, Sunset asked, “Does this whole situation, like, annoy you?”
“What do you mean.” The words were as one would ask a question, though the way it was intoned made it seem more like a statement.
Sunset hesitated. She decided to tread lightly here. “Idunno, it just…you seem kinda annoyed, and seeing as we’re here right now, both kinda like…sneaking around, I figured…y’know…maybe you’d rather not be doing this.”
Luna breathed in through her nose, and as her typing slowed, she released the breath as a quiet, weary sigh. “Admittedly,” she began in a lower tone, “while I do believe that extenuating circumstances often demand less conventional means to navigate them, there is a…frustration that I feel, yes. Not at you specifically, but the circumstances that we find ourselves in, both of us. All of us, really. This conspiracy.” Luna shook her head to herself, and the ghost of some of her displeasure manifested ethereally on her features. “It bothers me that things were allowed to progress to this point. I feel like a great deal of pain and danger could have been circumvented with more agreeable circumstances for all involved by the end of it, had it been handled differently. But it wasn’t, and because it wasn’t, here I am, breaking every standard I promised I’d uphold for the sake of doing what I think is right when I might have been able to do my duty and do the right thing at the same time. I know the better option when made to choose between the two, but the fact that I must choose...” She shook her head again, a little more spiritedly this time, and her frown grew to the extent that it could indeed be considered a proper frown. “It’s frustrating. This conspiracy frustrates me. It didn’t have to be like this.”
Sunset didn’t know what to say. She felt like there wasn’t much she could say here, given that this conspiracy was, at the end of the day, her fault. After a long silence, she found it in herself to say the only thing she felt like she was able to in her position: “I’m sorry.”
Luna closed her eyes briefly, visibly reigning in her emotions as the vexation drained from her face. “You needed guidance,” she said after a few moments. “That is ultimately what it comes down to: you needed guidance, and you were offered none.”
Sunset shrugged her shoulders a little, her eyes much preferring the sight of the table and her gutted binder to Luna herself. “I don’t think it would have mattered. I had a plan and I wasn’t hearing any alternatives.”
“There were four years between when this all began and what it culminated into. Worlds of change can happen in four years’ time. Worlds of change can happen in just one.”
Sunset shook her head, unconvinced. “It wouldn’t have mattered.”
“Maybe it would have, maybe it wouldn’t have.” The sound of keys clicking returned as Luna resumed typing on her laptop. “It doesn’t matter now. We could have tried. We didn’t, and now we’ll never know what difference could have been made, just that there maybe could have been one. That is what frustrates me.”
Sunset didn’t say anything. Her entire body felt heavier as she stared down at the homework in front of her, the text on the paper momentarily illegible to her eyes as she stared past it into the table while her thoughts began to churn. There was a pencil in her hand, point to the paper, but it was placed against empty space on the page rather than at the head of an open field.
Luna said nothing for a time, though she did speak up again after a little while. “There are days,” she muttered into her work. “I love my sister, and I trust her judgment, but there are days where I really have to wonder what goes through her head when she does what she does.”
Sunset didn’t register the tiny snap immediately. Her eyes came into focus on her pencil a few moments after it happened. The end had broken at the tip from pressure applied to it, the severed fragment of lead attached only by a few twisted slivers of wood. Her hand holding the pencil was shaking slightly, and the other one had closed into a tight fist where it had been left resting on the table. She hadn’t noticed this immediately, either.
Who did seem to notice immediately was Luna. Her eyes flicked up at the sound of a pencil snapping. The sounds of a keyboard halted a moment later.
For a time, all was silent. Sunset stared hard at her broken pencil, then lowered it again, letting it clatter near-silently to the table as she set it aside. Her eyes closed as she went through the motions of unclenching her jaw, then her fists, then other parts of her that the tension had caused to lock up to the tune of steady, even breaths. It didn’t diffuse the anger, but it kept her grounded enough to not act on it.
“Would you like some water, Sunset?”
Sunset didn’t open her eyes, though after a few moments she replied in a very measured voice, ”Yes, please.”
“Alright.” Luna’s voice was soft, supportive. There was a small squawk of a wooden chair being pushed back against a tiled floor, then footsteps drawing closer as Luna made her way across the room and placed a steadying hand on Sunset’s shoulder. “Breathe, just like you are. That’s good.”
Sunset nodded tersely, but otherwise didn’t react. The hand eventually left her shoulder with a promise of return she didn’t entirely hear, and Sunset was left alone for a time.
The whole time Luna was gone, Sunset focused on her breath entering and leaving her body. Among other things she did, she drew on meditation techniques that she had picked up over the years that doubled not just as an effective way to center one’s self for purposes of magic, but also in controlling emotions her own magic was intimately linked to. While its effects at calming her were somewhat limited, it gave her something to direct all of her energy into until her anger was less like an arc furnace blasting heat in all directions and more like a tight jet being focused in on a singular point for a purpose.
Purpose. Meaning. That always brought her into alignment: when it meant something. When it was for something. There was clarity in purpose, and right then, her purpose was in controlled breathing. She didn’t mean to obey Luna’s instructions, but there being instructions gave her that little extra nudge to bring herself in line that much quicker. From there, she breathed.
Luna returned eventually, though Sunset wouldn’t have been able to guess at how much time had passed, only that it hadn’t been long. A pair of water bottles had been brought back, one for each other them, and as Sunset broke the seal on the bottle so she could sip some of the icy contents, Luna began to transfer the papers and the laptop she was working on from the teacher’s desk to the table Sunset was sitting at, joining her at it like a peer rather than remaining at the front as a figurehead of authority.
It was a small gesture, but one that didn’t pass by Sunset unnoticed. With a background in noble customs, she of all people recognized the significance of forfeiting one’s place at the head of the table. The fact that its purpose was to bridge the gap between members of said table, which consisted of her and her alone…it brought a smile to Sunset’s face. She tried to cover it up by drinking more water.
The anger melted away much more quickly after that. Sunset extracted as much value from it as she could while it lasted, channeling the laser-tight focus it brought into some of the schoolwork she had yet to catch up on. It didn’t really matter what her grades were, in her mind, but it was something to do, and that was more important than anything right then.
This eventually passed, and as Sunset’s thoughts began to wander, she found herself glancing at the vice principal, who continued to plug away at her own work, still seated adjacent to Sunset rather than across the room from her. “Luna?”
Luna glanced up from her work to meet Sunset’s gaze, replying gently, “Yes?”
There was hesitation. Sunset considered swerving while she had a chance, though only briefly. The words fought her a little as they worked their way up her throat, but they were said all the same: “Is it too late to take you up on your offer?”
Recognition took only a moment to register, though when it did, a pleasant smile graced Luna’s lips. ”Not at all, Sunset.” Her gaze went back to her laptop, though her smile was unfaltering. “I made all preparations in advance in case you decided to follow up on the offer when I made it. I am ready whenever you are.”
“And um…I am, I guess. Ready, I mean, um…” In spite of her claims of readiness, Sunset’s tone was far from certain, and she reminded Luna, “You don’t- like I’m grateful, but you don’t need to do this.”
“We never need to do anything, Sunset.” Luna’s tone remained gentle, but there was a quality to it that resonated with a quiet yet unshakable resoluteness. The stone warrior’s sword had been planted for some time on this. “In all things in life, there is choice. This one is mine, and I stand by it.”
Sunset instinctively went to counter this, but she found herself only mouthing the words. After a few moments she closed her mouth and simply nodded.
It was quiet for the remainder of the detention period. In spite of it mostly being a front, little occurred that could truly be said to have differed from what a regular detention period would have consisted of, save only for Sunset breaking into her backpack to eat the meal Fluttershy had packed for her that she never had a chance to eat during lunch time. She still wasn’t sure about how to navigate this whole thing just yet, but what Sunset knew for sure was that by the end of that hour, she felt a lot closer to Luna, and it only had so much to do with their physical proximity.
Sunset Shimmer never met Princess Luna. She’d seen signs of her return in the brief time that Sunset had been skulking around in anticipation of her theft of the element of magic, but there had been little time to look into this, much less meet her personally. All the same, Sunset assumed that, because there was a close link between the school and Equestria’s leadership, Vice Principal Luna - second in command in what the mirror equated to the highest form of authority in the realm in odd little way - would be exceptionally well-off, as befitting of royalty. She had heard of some of Luna’s story personally, and that didn’t sound much like it would leave a person with a great deal to their name, but the fact that she was a princess in a neighboring world took logical precedence in her mind.
As it turned out, this was the wrong conclusion to come to. The first indicator of this was that her navy blue truck easily had a hundred thousand miles on the mileage counter, and while Sunset didn’t know a great deal about cars or other human vehicles, she did know that this number was occasionally used as a reference of being quite high, and the condition of it reflected this. Rust spots were growing like cancer blotches beneath the wheel wells, the tires were stripped and in need of replacing, and there was a split in the windshield that was out of the way for now, but was likely slowly growing as time passed. When Luna had let her into the vehicle, she had unlocked the thing with the push of a button, then had had to enter the truck herself and reach all the way across to the passenger door to unlock it manually, because the wireless locking mechanism didn’t release the lock anymore and hadn’t for a long time.
Sunset had been willing to overlook this and didn’t look into it too much. It was just a truck, after all. Some were great, and sometimes they're crap. No big deal.
Then they arrived at their destination. Sunset had zoned out along the way and hadn’t been tracking where they were going. In her mind they couldn’t be anywhere near it yet, so imagine her surprise when they stopped off somewhere in the middle of town not all that far from where Sunset had been squatting full time just a few weeks ago. Now imagine that surprised doubled when Sunset realized that it was not some estate or manor that Luna resided in, but an apartment complex. Not even as the landlord, either, but as just another tenant.
Sunset was having second thoughts about this arrangement as they walked up the stairs, but for very different reasons than she would have cited before having seen this place first-hand. She wasn’t feeling bold enough to express them straight on, though she did think to ask, “Are you allowed to have guests in apartments? I don’t know how this works.”
Luna's response was casual: “The landlady and I have an understanding.”
Sunset was willing to believe that. That was that concern put to rest, though it didn’t help the anxiety gnawing at her stomach as they reached the appropriate floor near the top of the building. After a few moments of juggling with the keys, Luna unlocked the door for them both to enter, and they did so.
Luna’s room was a nearly perfectly square studio apartment that couldn’t have been any larger than twenty feet on a side. Everything that there was in the apartment was all crammed into the same room together in the rough facsimile of what a proper house’s arrangement would look like: the kitchen appliances were against the western wall, and across an imaginary line where the ‘rooms’ transitioned, there was a couch with a coffee table in front of a television for the ‘living room.’ There was a small wooden desk tucked to the side alongside a filing cabinet, both of which bristled with charger cords and other cables to various chargeable devices for what maybe passed as a ‘study,’ and though it wasn’t obvious at first, there was a second room in here that became visible once you entered a few steps: a bathroom, somehow being uncomfortably snug yet managing to sidestep the feeling of claustrophobia at the last second.
It almost didn’t look like there was a bed in this room whatsoever until Sunset realized that what had clearly once been a closet had been stripped of its interior and now had a single-person mattress shoved into the space, which there was barely enough room for but in such a way that it almost looked perfectly tailored for the space. The sliding door could still be shut despite how narrow the clearance appeared, and it was such a snug space that it could be freely opened and closed even while beneath the covers.
Sunset was at once saddened and impressed. This was leagues beneath what she would have expected Luna’s means to amount to in terms of living space, but for a studio apartment, it wasn’t bad. She had no real point of reference for what made a good apartment or not, just that it couldn’t compare to a proper house, but she liked it anyway. “That I like,” Sunset pointed at the little personal tomb of a bedroom with a chuckle. “That’s kinda slick.”
“I’m rather pleased with it myself.” Luna’s response sounded as measured and level as ever, but there was delight in her expression when she spoke, like the praise was directed at her personally and she wasn’t expecting it. “There isn’t much I can do with this space, but that little customization just made this whole apartment feel so much more…” She gestured around the apartment, the words not immediately coming to her, though she eventually settled with, “It makes it feel more like a home, to me.”
“Yeah.” Sunset had nodded at the time, looking around the room with a newfound appreciation that slowly built the more she thought about it. “I get you.”
And she did. Maybe Sunset didn’t know much about modifications to her living space, but she at least understood the importance of imprinting yourself on what was yours. Her thoughts went to cutie marks and how much more personal it got when even something as simple as a coffee mug had not just any symbol on it, but you. Your symbol. That was your cup. It was, in a small way, a part of you, and the value of that far and away transcended whatever petty material worth the object represented. It was quite literally a closet of a bedroom, but that didn’t matter: it was Luna’s . That was her bedroom. She did that. She was proud of it, and as far as Sunset was concerned, she had every right to be. Good for her.
That understanding put most of the anxieties Sunset had to rest about the whole deal. It still wasn’t ideal in her mind, and she still felt a little guilty for taking up space in an apartment that already had so little of that to spare, but it didn’t feel like it was an intrusion that wasn’t being seen for what it was anymore, because Luna knew the value of this place. She had to know, because it was hers. She'd made it hers, and now she was opening it up to Sunset, and that was okay. More than okay, even. It was an honor.
With that in mind, Sunset aspired to leave as small of a footprint here as she possibly could. She kept all of her things tucked to one side where it was out of the way (relatively easy, given it all fit into a school backpack), vowed to stay tidy, and told Luna that she would try not to rely on her hospitality any more than she had to, as grateful as she was for it - she had a for-sure place for the weekends right now and while the weeks were spotty, she would try to find something else when she could. She didn’t even think twice about how the only place Luna had to offer for sleeping space was the couch, because frankly that was better than most of the places she had slept for the last four months. A slightly stiff couch in a warm, dry apartment building with lights, power, and running water? Yes please, all that and then some, thank you very much.
The night wasn’t far from arriving when they entered the apartment, and by the time it did, Sunset Shimmer was brimming over with gratitude so much so that her eyes had misted over several times at the thought of it all. She had no right to ask for this, yet it had been offered all the same without second thought. What a privilege she’d been given here.
Luna had since changed into a bathrobe, beneath which a pair of fuzzy pajama pants could be seen that looked incredibly soft. Halfway stepping into her private little closet bedroom, she turned back to look at where Sunset had laid out across the couch, which was only just long enough to fit the girl stretched out at her full length. “I’ll be up for a bit longer, but I need to sleep. I’ve business in the morning.”
It was so otherworldly to see the normally formal and crisply well-dressed Vice Principal Luna in such an aggressively casual night outfit, but something about that made it feel so real, too. Sunset nodded from where she laid in an attempt to not seem like she was staring, giving a little wave with her hands currently resting on her stomach. “Alright. I’ll be here, minding my P’s and Q’s.”
“You’ve a firm B in English, so I’ll have a moderate degree of confidence in this.” Sunset chuckled at this, and it only took a moment for the stony composure of Luna to buckle and for her to join in on this, stepping the rest of the way into her bedroom space. She more or less had to climb onto her bed in order to clear the doorway. “Goodnight, Sunset.”
“Goodnight.” Sunset sat up a little bit before the door closed so she could say, “And thank you, again, really. This means so much to me.”
The response wasn’t verbal, merely a particularly wide and warm smile, coupled with a little bow of the head. With that, she slid the sliding door closed, sealing herself away in her little tomb of a bedroom.
Sunset laid there for a while more before reaching over to the coffee table and clicking off the light on the table, plunging the room into darkness. She could faintly hear the sounds of the last of the evening traffic as the night wound down, but most of it never reached seven stories up, and what did would pass as ambient white noise and did little to disturb Sunset’s thoughts.
She didn’t go to sleep immediately, of course. She pulled the blanket off the back of the couch to cover herself in, rolled onto her side as she worked the pillow under her cheek in the hopes of extracting a bit more comfort out of it, and pulled out her phone to see what she’d missed from earlier in the day. Rarity was the obvious first stop, though she could see there were notifications from Fluttershy too.
Rarity
Normally Sunset would have been a little more hesitant to affirm this offer from earlier in the week. The events of today left her in a far more grateful mood than usual, however, and it very much colored her unhesitating response:
You
Sunset didn’t linger around for a response. It would be nice if she got one, but it was late and Rarity hadn’t been able to stay up into the late night for a few weeks now. She’d see her tomorrow anyway, so they’d make up for it. It and other things.
Buck it’ll be nice to have a full day to ourselves.
The next set of texts she visited was from Fluttershy. There were a few of them, and they’d been gathering one by one throughout the day.
Fluttershy
Fluttershy
Fluttershy
Fluttershy
Sunset winced. She wasted no time in breaking the silence on her end.
You
She hit send, and she was in the middle of continuing that line of thought when an ellipses manifested at the bottom of the screen and began back and forth, which prompted Sunset to pause and wait for Fluttershy’s response.
Fluttershy
You
Fluttershy
It was phrased like assurance, though all it accomplished was making Sunset feel a tiny bit worse.
Fluttershy
Sunset considered whether or not she should be candid about this arrangement of hers. It could be considered a little weird that she was bunking with the vice principal of the high school, but if there was anyone who’d be understanding - especially knowing what she knew - it’d be Fluttershy.
You
Fluttershy
You
Fluttershy
Sunset raised her eyebrows for the briefest with a declaration of 'welp' painted all over her face. Fair enough response, she supposed.
You
Fluttershy
Sunset rolled her eyes, though it was alongside a small smile.
You
Fluttershy
You
Fluttershy
You
Fluttershy
There were far too many exclamation points and symbols dedicated to emojis for Sunset to believe that for a second. She chuckled quietly to herself in the dark.
You
Fluttershy
You
Fluttershy
Sunset did not so much hesitate as she came to a full screeching stop to process this. When that didn’t immediately spell it out, she stepped back and analyzed it further.
That was one hell of a question. There were several ways to take it, and it was Fluttershy, so there was a lot of room for leniency to be had, but damn did that ever feel like a loaded question. It was the sort of question she’d be scared to be caught smoking around in case a stray spark caught and caused it to explode in someone’s face- which is sort of what it felt like the circumstance was!
What the hell did she even say to that? Joke? Jokingly? Her impulse went to joking it off, but she was very concerned about the possibility that this wasn’t a joking kind of question. Then what did she do? What if it was a joke that had been worded oddly and she took it too seriously and weirded Fluttershy out?
Fortunately for Sunset, Harmony itself appeared to be listening and, in that moment, chose to take mercy on her.
Fluttershy
Sunset released the breath she didn’t realize she’d been holding in relief. Thank the sun and stars.
You
Fluttershy
You
Fluttershy
That weird little misstep didn't totally leave her mind, but things normalized quickly after that and Sunset was relieved and happy to move past it. The two chattered on for a little while longer before Fluttershy had to go to bed, leaving Sunset alone to her thoughts in the dark of the night. For once, though, that wasn’t a bad thing.
Everything felt like it was getting better all of a sudden. She had options, and they were slowly expanding the more she branched out. Her quality of life was on the rise. There was still a fair bit left to be desired, namely in how it was looking increasingly like some of her independence was indeed going to have to be one of the compromises necessary to continue ensuring she had places to stay that wouldn’t take chunks out of her health as the year progressed towards winter, but after having tasted the worst that homelessness had to offer, that felt like a small price to pay. It was all looking up.
…well…maybe not all.
The sheer force of optimism that had been fed to her today would hold Sunset’s thoughts above water as the notorious midnight spiral tried to pull her down. She was fading faster than the dark place could take hold, so at least for tonight, Sunset Shimmer was spared the worst of her own anxiety.
However, Sunset was not completely spared from darkness. As her consciousness gently let go, one last thought crossed her mind.
Of all the people out there who were willing to stop what they were doing to be patient, kind, understanding, and supportive to Sunset in her darkest hour, even if it meant bending the rules to get her the support she needed, why was it the human version of Princess Luna who was there by her side instead of the great alicorn that had let her student fall from the heights she'd raised her to in the first place?
Sleep came just moments later. Sunset slept well that night.
Author's Note
Bit of a long one again. I suspect there may be some errors I haven’t caught yet, but I haven’t had a ton of energy lately and I kinda just want to publish. Any errors pointed out in the comments are greatly appreciated, as always.
Pulse
While they were a little estranged these days, Sunset Shimmer wasn’t exactly a stranger to hubris. She and it went way back, and while she was making strides to distance herself from it, every once in a while it reached out to her and before she knew it, it was just like old times.
She didn’t think the thoughts in such terms, per se, but somewhere in Sunset’s head, she got the idea that the progress she’d been making in improving her living situation was incredibly good progress. So good, in fact, that she had more or less resolved things for herself. She had options for a place to stay every day of the week (not a great number of them, but that there was multiple choices felt massive), she was eating more than a single discount school lunch most of the week, and it was coming up on three weeks that she’d ever had to think about her squatting spot in that ruined skeleton of a gas station store front. That all looked like success to her.
Then circumstances had simply not worked out ideally. One morning after bunking with Luna the previous night, something came up and she’d had to fly at something like 6:30, well before most anyone was awake and before most of Sunset’s backup options for squatting somewhere warm and dry had opened up that day. She had permission to stay overnight, but the apartment complex was not a homeless shelter, so she couldn’t stick around.
She had told Luna that she had ideas and that she’d work it out just fine. What actually happened was that Sunset had been caught flat-footed at a bad time and had been too embarrassed to admit it, thus seeing herself cast to the streets where she might have been fine if she’d been smarter about it. She more or less walked around for several hours in the dark kicking herself until the public library opened up and she could take shelter till one of her friends was awake enough to drive by and pick her up.
It definitely stung her pride, but it was a reality check worth having. In hindsight, Sunset admitted to herself that she should have known better. She had been feeling almost euphoric with how much better things had gotten lately, just to be reminded that while she was getting some help - and it was helping - she was still homeless. She still woke up sore from the weeks and weeks of strain that her body had gone through, she still had lost a lot of weight and didn’t show clear sign of putting any of it back on yet, she still had to punctuate her day with cough syrup and medication to keep the sickness she had from causing its full capacity for disruption and discomfort, and when push came to shove, she still had nowhere to go. Her situation was better, but that did not mean her situation was good. There was still a lot of work to do before it was anything close to that.
Sunset wasn’t stupid. She knew what the answer was. She just didn’t like it. She’d never liked it. That’s why she’d put it off as long as she had.
And therein was the problem, wasn’t it? Delay. Denial. The usual thing. It wasn’t smart, so why was she still doing it? What was she waiting for?
Sunset breathed in through her nose, then sighed the stream of air quietly through her lips. Despite the lunch tray in her hands where it rested against her lap, she stared at the front entrance of the lunch room, sitting back far enough that her back was touching the corner behind her. She could see clearly into the lunch room, yet her angle was such that relatively few would be able to see her from the distance she stood back from, if they even cared to look. It also meant that she couldn’t see them clearly, but that was kind of fine. It was one less excuse to leave. It was also sort of bad in that she couldn’t tell where they were and thus couldn’t plan where exactly to go, making the whole thing seem just a pinch less certain as a result.
Sunset went to stand up twice. It wasn’t really clear what she intended to do either time, but she felt it all the same, staring into the open cafeteria doors. The third time she felt the impulse, it actually reached her feet, and she managed to bring herself to stand upright. Before she could consider doing much more than that, however, she became aware of a commotion down the hallway to her left, running parallel to the cafeteria.
Calling it ”commotion” was perhaps not the best way to describe it. “Commotion” implied something disorderly, something adjacent to or at least within arm’s reach to conflict, and this wasn’t that. It was definitely a marked increase and shift in noise coming from down the hall, however - sounds of surprise and pleasantries coming from some of the students from further down the hall and around the corner, just out of sight. She watched several other heads turn, and from where Sunset stood she watched two kids’ faces light up in surprise, then delight as they got up from where they were sitting to hurry around the corner towards something.
Sunset was confused by this, but curious. She started walking down the hall towards whatever was doing on, leaning forward slightly as she tried to wrack her brain for hint of what this could possibly be, when she heard - amidst the pleasantly-aligned clamor coming from around the corner - the intonation of something that sounded entirely too familiar to Sunset that brought her to a halt mid-step. Before she could even begin to process what her feelings were or how to handle this, Twilight Sparkle stepped around the corner, a dozen hangers-on in her shadow, and walked straight towards her.
By all accounts, Twilight Sparkle was a pretty girl. She had nice hair, nice clothes, and everything about her expression and the very features on her face beamed signals to one’s brain that said, ‘this one is friendly.’ Little didn’t appeal in some way or another, as far as appearances went. It was actually one of the initial hurdles that Sunset had been forced to deal with when she first meant to confront her: it was like her brain conspired to make her want to like her.
Whether her brain wanted to like her or not, however, in that moment it was like facing an oncoming pair of headlights coming in from the other side of a tunnel. Sunset froze where she stood, eyes wide, and perhaps the only thing keeping fight-or-flight from pulling the trigger one way or the other - paradoxically - was the way Twilight’s face lit up when she saw her and waved. Somehow being identified made it better.
Twilight’s hangers-on fell out of her shadow as Twilight hurried forward, no one else particularly eager to close the distance with Sunset Shimmer of all people. If Twilight noticed, she gave no indication, seemingly far too interested in scurrying up to her ex-enemy to notice her crowd peeling back. “It’s so good to see you again, Sunset! How’ve you been?”
Sunset, in complete contrast to how Twilight was all smiles, was stiff with panic. She was not prepared to be in this situation in any capacity, and the gears in her head were currently jammed up hard midway through three completely separate thoughts: the visceral and invasive memory of broken concrete under her burning hands as she pulled herself out of a crater, a feeble attempt to discern the current phase of the moon (though apparently the answer was “full”), and half-visualizing the hallways adjacent to the one they were standing in in a half-formed first step of trying to formulate an escape that was no longer possible.
Perhaps expectedly, a response did not make its way to Sunset’s lips quick enough to play the whole thing off. Twilight Sparkle regarded the silence and deer-in-headlights expression with a slightly concerned yet no less sympathetic slanting of her own smiling expression. “…hey, relax. It’s okay.” She reached out and touched one of Sunset’s arms where they were locked in place, holding the lunch tray she’d already forgotten about. “There’s nothing to be afraid of. We’re friends now, remember?”
An ugly half-laugh burst out of Sunset. “Are- are we?” The quality to her voice as she laughed this was not quite manic, but not exactly far from it, either.
“Of course we’re friends, Sunset!” Twilight’s response managed to straddle the line between upbeat and chiding. “We do have a history, but all of that’s behind us. Right now, I’m just glad to see you!” Twilight’s face was washed over with a new tide of joyful delight till it nearly shone as much as her big purple eyes did. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t able to visit sooner, but I’ve been thinking about you ever since last time, and I’ve been really hopeful that everything has been working out well! Have you been doing okay? How’re your new friends?”
Sunset let out a single high-pitched, anxiety-wrought chuckle as she struggled to process a response that would make sense. Every alarm in her head was wailing and shrieking, and she couldn’t hear herself think. The hands holding her plastic lunch tray were trembling, gripping the edges like it was the only thing keeping her from falling down the face of a cliff. “Oh, y- y’know, work in progress.”
“Work in progress is good!” Twilight clapped her hands together a little as she did a little excited bounce in place, all of her words just as animated as she. “I won’t lie, I’m really excited to see how you’ve all been bonding since I was last here. There was so much progress being made already, and I’m so eager to see how you’ve been getting along without me!”
Sunset nodded along, her smile like a strip of netting pulled so taut that one twitch in any direction would make it split straight down the middle. “They’re uh,” she turned in place and had to physically flex her fingers to get them to release the tray enough to gesture in the direction of the cafeteria. “They’re right in there, if you- um- they- lunch.”
Twilight clapped her hands together with a declaration of, “Perfect!” and immediately started moving in that direction, though not before stopping waving Sunset along. “C’mon, let’s say hi! Spending time with your friends will help calm you down, too.”
“O- okay.” Sunset glanced around herself briefly, looking for anything she could possibly use - any kind of escape, anything. Her eyes found her tray in her shaking hands. “Give m- give me one second, just let me just find- find somewhere to- put this.”
It wasn’t a good excuse. It was kind of a pathetic excuse, actually, but Twilight was excited enough to not be thinking about things like analyzing it. Even though she was waiting, Twilight was clearly eager and tugged ahead just a bit towards the cafeteria, just far enough that it took her past the edge of the wall. Sunset had been looking around herself, wandering in the opposite direction in a show of looking for somewhere to sit her tray down, and the moment she glanced back and saw Twilight break line of sight, her brain screamed, “BREAK FOR IT,” and she listened. She dropped her lunch tray on a bench outside the attendance office and broke into a mad dash, rounding the bend in a second’s time and sprinting down the closest hall like Hell was on her heels.
She wasn’t ready. She wasn’t ready she wasn’t ready she wasn’t ready she wasn’t ready she wasn’t ready she couldn’t be here she wasn’t ready. She wasn’t ready. She couldn’t be here.
Sunset didn’t stop running until she made it to the girls’ bathroom on the other side of the school. She blasted through the door, ignored the surprised shriek of whoever she’d nearly flattened on her way in, locked herself in the farthest stall, and there she stayed. She tucked in her legs such that she wouldn’t be visible if viewed from below, hugged her knees in the fetal position, and waited for time to pass.
Lunch period hadn’t ended yet when her pocket vibrated. This wasn’t surprising to her. She let it sit there for a while, and just as she was settling into the idea of not even checking it, much less responding, her phone vibrated again, as if in defiance of these thoughts.
Sunset’s eyes rolled as she shoved a hand into her pocket and yanked her phone out in front of her, leering at the screen.
Rarity
…Sunset lowered her phone slightly as her gaze shifted to the side slightly. She didn’t know the answer to that.
While she was considering this, she raised her phone again to see the other message. It wasn’t from Rarity.
Fluttershy
The corner of Sunset’s mouth tugged upward slightly, though it faded after a moment.
She meant to reply to either of them, she really did. However, each time she went to, the words just…fizzled. She blanked hard each time she tried to sum up even the basics of a rudimentary response, and Sunset eventually gave up trying to respond at all. She sent both of them a heart emoji just to demonstrate that she was alive, then put her phone back in her pocket and let her head fall forward onto her knees, intent on staying in this bathroom stall until she got tired of sitting in here, she felt like talking to someone, or she was forcefully removed, whatever came first.
Naturally, this took her well past the extent of lunch period. Three groups of girls entered the bathroom in the time it took fourth period to start, each one turning the room into an echo chamber of their chattering and gossiping. To no one’s surprise, Twilight Sparkle’s unexpected arrival was the talk of the town, as reflected by each of them talking either about her or gossiping about people who were totally eying her up or whatever they thought was going on. Every time someone entered, Sunset half-expected it to be either Twilight herself or someone about to knock on her stall and tell her to get out of there. Neither of these were proven true, and by the time fourth period’s starting bell chimed, she had yet to be bothered even incidentally.
The silence that followed felt good to Sunset. It was in the vacuous stillness while class was going on that Sunset was able to bring herself to properly relax and fall still. She didn’t think, simply falling in sync with time’s passage and zoning out. It wasn’t quite peace, but it was peaceful, enough so that Sunset may have briefly lapsed into a nap. She wasn’t sure, just that she had that sensation that felt sort of like coming to if you only really became aware at the tail end of it.
It was only then that Sunset thought to check the time: 12:41. Most of fourth period had been skipped already…may as well just carry on with it, at that point.
As she probably could have predicted, Sunset had received other texts since she’d completely mentally checked out.
Rarity
Rarity
Rarity
Rarity
That made up the backlog, but like Rarity knew when she was looking, a text arrived as Sunset had the phone in her hand.
Rarity
That brought a proper smile to Sunset’s face.
You
Raritydid say I was in your corner. Talk after class?
Not about to turn that down. Seemed like a good idea besides.
You
Rarity
You
Earthy, down-to-business when something needed doing, dependable. Good ol’ Rarity.
And then there was Fluttershy.
Fluttershy’s responses after the initial heart she’d sent contained little text. There was the direct response of a heart emoji of her own, and from that point on her responses were composed almost solely of animal pictures. Her own, namely; picture after picture of her two cats, a dog she hadn’t seen before but which had been in Fluttershy’s house apparently, and of course, a great number of photos of Angel Bunny in action. There were 27 of them uploaded that had petered off after class started, but even just recently there was an Angel Bunny with a leaf sticking out of his mouth trying very hard to figure out what the person taking the picture (wonder who that could be) was doing. Cute animal picture after cute animal picture after cute animal picture for nearly an hour, all posted because, and quoted from the only text-based response Sunset received:
Fluttershy
And y’know what? It kinda worked. They made Sunset want to pet Fluttershy’s animals. They all looked so soft and well-groomed. She wished that the one that was always laying on Fluttershy wasn’t so skittish and that Angel Bunny was less of a dick to anyone that wasn’t his owner.
You
Fluttershy
You
Fluttershy
It wasn’t often, but sometimes Sunset wanted to pet Fluttershy too. Forget her animals, sometimes she herself deserved to be patted on the head and told she’s good. She’d make such a face, too, which would make it even better.
The combination of the cute animal reel and the Fluttershy distracted Sunset for long enough that the hour elapsed and the bell rang in the hallways, briefly filling the school with its one-note chorus. In a matter of seconds the halls would be flooded with students, and while Sunset wasn’t exactly feeling eager to fling herself out there and potentially run face-first into Twilight Sparkle immediately, she had at least caught her breath enough that she could cling to courage and step out of the bathroom, then hide amidst the tides of people till she could make her way to the locker of one of her closest friends.
Rarity was waiting for her. Sunset could tell because she was standing in front of her closed locker, hand on the handle, looking around in waiting. Once she spotted Sunset, she flashed a smile and opened her locker up, sinking back a bit until it seemed her only destination could be the interior of her locker as Sunset stepped up. They kept the locker door acting as much of a barrier to the surrounding students as possible. It wasn’t quite privacy, but it was about as good as it got in the middle of a crowded public hallway.
“Hi darling.” They were up close and neither locker on either side of hers was being attended, so Rarity didn’t hide the warmth in her voice, though she did keep her voice down. “Feeling better?”
“A bit.” Sunset leaned against the edge of the door, both because she wanted to anyway and because it made her an extension of the barrier to block line of sight. “Still don’t know what I’m supposed to do.”
“Have you tried talking to her?” Rarity’s tone was very dry as she said this, though after she eased up. “At the risk of stating the obvious, that is my advice.”
“And say what?” Sunset threw the arm she wasn’t leaning with as part of this question. “Am I supposed to be all buddy-buddy with this mare? She wrecked my shit! She and I, we- we’re not- this isn’t like two old friends coming back together. We fought with each other! I humiliated her in front of hundreds! She shot me with a bucking divine rainbow laser!”
Rarity raised a finger to clinically point out, “I also contributed to the rainbow laser predicament.”
Sunset mouthed something at first, finally able to manage, “Okay?”
“You talk to me just fine.”
“Well it- that’s not-“ Sunset lowered her voice and leaned in a little to mutter with a half-chuckle, “That’s not entirely the same, now is it?”
“It could be.”
“I’m not dating Twilight.”
Rarity rolled her eyes. “Don’t be dull. I’m saying, we had a relationship that could be described as confrontational at one point, too.”
“We’ve had months to move past that. Closer to half a year at this point. For Twilight, I’ve had like, one entire hour and a panic attack.”
“Oh,” Rarity chuckled quietly, “I don’t think it’ll take long to recategorize that one in your head once you start talking to her. She’s very friendly.”
“I’m sure she is,” Sunset replied, trying to sound less annoyed than she was, with limited success. “I’m just saying-“
“Look, Sunset-“ Rarity stepped up closer to Sunset. She rested the tips of her fingers in the window where her jacket wasn’t completely zipped up, right where a necklace would go if she was wearing one. “Listen, you’ve got this habit of getting in your own head about things, and I think you’re doing it here. That girl’s a sweetheart. Just talk to her.”
Sunset frowned openly. She plucked Rarity’s hand off her chest and pushed it down, though when she did, she failed to release it afterwards. Both their grips adjusted themselves as they held hands where no one would be able to see them doing it at the angle they were at. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Oh that I’m very much not concerned with,” Rarity laughed. “You could make word salad sound charming and intentional. You frequently do, even!”
“I’m being serious...”
“So am I.” Rarity’s voice was immediately depleted of cheer to demonstrate this. “I’m not just saying that because I think you’re funny. I do, mind, but your ad lib skills are not insignificant. Just roll with it, darling!It’s one of your best talents! It’s half of your charm, for God’s sake, you can absolutely manage that. What are you so nervous for?”
Sunset leaned on the locker door, casting a look down that hall that looked irritated but was very much meant to look irritated. The reality was that she was indeed nervous and trying to figure out what to do with that anxiety. “I don’t know.”
“You’ve completely got this,” Rarity encouraged, emphasizing with a squeeze of their discreetly linked hands. “Sunset Shimmer can handle talking to one girl. She’s already decided she’s on your side, even, so you’re not even winning her over here.”
Sunset’s only response was an anxious, wordless noise of quiet dread. It was responded to with an equally wordless supportive smile, and a soft squeeze of their clandestinely joined hands.
After standing there for a little longer, simply holding hands and sharing wordless looks where they were tucked in with Rarity’s locker door shielding them, the warning bell chimed. Rarity’s expression became one of longing as she looked at Sunset, a quiet sigh slipping past her lips as the few students around them began to scurry. “Oh, to have more minutes in the day…”
Sunset nodded in solemn agreement. Their hands remained tightly linked for just a few seconds longer before they were forced to part, then go their separate ways for fifth period.
Maybe the threat of Rarity’s little sister discovering them wasn’t quite so bad if it meant she got to go home with Rarity. Once she sobered up a little bit, Sunset would realize it was almost assuredly not worth Crusader involvement, but there were days - more now than before, especially - where having the attention of the trifecta of trouble didn’t seem so bad if it meant she could have Rarity back so they could spend all their time together again.
Fifth and sixth periods came and went. Fifth period was at least remarkable for Sunset in that she really enjoyed art class. With the exception of certain history courses and the honorary mention of social studies before Ms. Harshwhinney became particularly intolerant of her ability to draw breath, art was Sunset’s favorite class. It was a little harder to enjoy it than usual today, as Sunset found herself particularly distracted with the thought of facing Twilight Sparkle months after their conflict and while Sunset was only just now starting to recover from her fall. She thought a lot about what Rarity had said, though, and she also found herself asking what it is that she was so worried about with their meeting. She couldn’t pin down exactly what her fear was, though analyzing it did help a little with reducing the grip the anxiety had on her. Anxiety lingered, of course, and she wasn’t completely able to shake the vague dread she felt about having to face Twilight, but it was at least to the point where she was confident enough about it that she texted Rarity and let her know that she was probably okay to see Twilight before the day was up. Time would tell if she’d regret that or not.
Meanwhile, Sunset’s day went on. Sixth period ended, and as most of the student body prepared to go home, Sunset attended detention, as per the arrangement with Luna.
Most of the time Sunset had at least made a token effort to remain on task for it, if for no other reason than to have an alibi for if some member of school staff walked in the room, but today was one of those days where Sunset wasn’t feeling particularly bothered with letting her hair down. She placed her backpack on the single table placed in the center of the room, though rather than even open it, Sunset instead strode to the far side of the room to one of the windows. The angle it offered wasn’t great, but Sunset was able to peer down into the courtyard from here, and she did so.
Dozens of students were streaming out the front of the building, though the largest surge had already made its way out the double doors as everyone either found their car from the rapidly thinning parking lot, boarded the conga line of yellow busses currently parked along the road in preparation to begin their circuits through town, or were wandering off on foot. Very few were dawdling, though those that were did so in anticipation of a ride or to make use of the school’s exterior as a meeting spot now that everyone was out of class and still roughly in the same place. Among those people were the Rainbooms, who were primarily visible from the distance because they routinely chose the statue towering over the courtyard as their meeting spot and no one was willing to challenge that territorial claim - hell, they’d practically been awarded it after they’d saved the school.
The group loitering out front was a fair bit bigger than normal today. Twilight Sparkle was there and no doubt the cause of this as she continued to turn heads and draw a fair bit of attention from other students. Despite the extra bodies she’d pulled with her presence, Sunset was able to make out the profile of some of the more distinct-looking Rainbooms. She saw Applejack first because of the hat, and from there she was able to pick out most of the others from their peers, though not all of them. Rarity had left already, of course, and Sunset couldn’t tell if Pinkie was around or if she had departed herse- nope, there she was. There was only one person that streak of pink could be.
Sunset just watched. There wasn’t much point to it - she couldn’t hope to hear what was being said down there and they were too far up and over for her to make out much detail - but she had an angle she could watch from, so she did. After standing around for a minute, Sunset hopped up onto the counter so she wouldn’t have to lean as much, propping one foot up against the window frame as she rested one arm against that knee. Her other leg gently swang where it hung as Sunset peered on, watching from afar while Twilight Sparkle held the attention of a group of a dozen or so other kids and appeared to be juggling dialogues with all of them with a big, friendly smile on her face.
It wasn’t clear when exactly Luna joined her in people watching, but at some point Sunset felt Luna’s presence come up behind her as the room all but shifted as the weight of her aura caused the entire room’s center of mass to drift to one side. Sunset glanced in her direction, but didn’t do much more than confirm she was there before looking back out the window again. “You talk to her yet?”
“Briefly,” was the response. Luna’s tone was nonchalant, almost offhandedly so, though her expression had a quality to it as she observed the loitering students that looked distantly disapproving. “That portal isn’t open now, is it?”
Sunset’s eyes briefly touched on the statue’s base, where the portal would be. Rainbow Dash was sitting on it, leaning against the ankle of the wondercolt. “It’s open from now to the midnight of the day after the full moon. Then it closes.”
Luna’s disapproval deepened on her expression. The worry did as well. “I’m still concerned about students falling through.”
“Twilight’s right there.” This was said alongside a dismissive wave of the hand. “And if they did go through, they’d either freak out and go back or get turned around.”
If this assuaged Luna’s fears at all, it didn’t reflect in her expression. She opened her mouth to say something, then leaned slightly forward, peering more towards the front of the school, then let out a relieved breath of, “Good, Celestia’s there.”
Sunset likewise leaned forward a little. Sure enough, Dean Celestia was standing out in front of the school while all these students were gathered. She didn’t appear to be doing anything and wasn’t involved in the conversation, but she was there and appeared to be keeping active watch. Sunset sat back again, grunting noncommittally, “So she is.”
Luna seemed far more comforted by this than anything. Her posture loosened and she leaned back. “Good, very good.” She let out a quiet breath with a shake of her head. “Still, I wish we could put barriers up, or tape it off, or…something. Knowing there’s a hole right there that any student could slip into by accident fills me with such anxiety.”
Sunset half-turned her head in Luna’s direction at this. “Why don’t you?”
“My sister is convinced that such measures would draw attention to the portal’s existence and create far more potential for peril than they’d prevent. To some extent I agree with this,” Luna leaned against the counter as she went on, “but I also feel like depending on something not happening in the first place isn’t so much a solution as it is standing idly by and hoping for the best. The best is preferable, certainly, but seldom do ‘what is preferable’ and ‘what we get’ correlate as often as we’d like. I also can’t help but feel like something less passive would be the more responsible choice. At least then if some accident were to occur, we could say that we took steps to prevent it in advance.” Luna then sighed, adding, “I will admit, however, I’ve yet to come up with a solution that would be better than what silence and inaction has done so far. As with so many of my sister’s ideas, I wish they were not the preferable choice, but…”
“But they are,” Sunset finished, a note of grimness in her voice. She leaned forward a little more so she could look down at the side of Dean Celestia’s head as she watched on with that professionally tailored smile of hers. “Celestia has good ideas. It’s one of the best and worst things about her.”
Luna looked at Sunset with a look of equal parts curiosity and caution. “What do you mean?”
“Well…” Sunset tapped her hand lightly against the countertop she sat atop, mulling over her words for a second or two. “She’s smart. Right? Celestia’s a really, really smart person, and her ideas are almost always good ones. I’d trust just about any- well.” She paused at that, reconsidering her word choice. “I would trust that an idea she came up with is sound enough that it would work. Even if it’s not perfect, the fact that she’s presenting it at all means she’s put enough thought and consideration into it that- like, you can rely on that most of the time. She has good ideas.”
“She does, yes.”
Sunset nodded. She paused for a beat, and then tapped on the counter to emphasize as she went on, “The problem is when it doesn’t work. Celestia doesn’t make stupid little mistakes: she makes big ones. When something goes wrong with Celestia’s plans, it’s not because it was a bad idea. It’s because something went horribly, horribly wrong - something she either couldn’t have known, or which she did know, but it was way worse than she thought. So when Celestia bucks something up, she bucks it up hard. Lives will be turned upside-down for it.” Sunset looked on at Celestia down there for a little longer, then decided she could stand it no longer and looked somewhere else instead - the statue became the new focal point of her vaguely ireful stare. “I kind of hate it about her.”
The curiosity on Luna’s expression shifted along its axis, metamorphosing into something like suspicion. “Is there some history here I’m not privy to?”
Sunset winced at this question. She scratched the back of her neck. “Um…”
“You speak of my sister as though you know her. More so than most, even. You’ve been in our world for no more than four years, and I know for certain that no such relationship between you and her exists.” Luna turned to face Sunset more head on, arms crossing over her chest. “Not in this world, at least.”
Sunset’s expression continued to reflect a grimace - she’d tipped her hand too much there, far too much. Maybe Celestia didn’t make stupid mistakes, but that surely didn’t extend to her wayward apprentice. “Y- yeah, um…I knew- I know your sister, um…in the- in the other world.”
Luna nodded along with this. Her suspicion ebbed as her expression in general softened, replaced by that curiosity that had begun this line of questioning. “Extensively, by the sounds of it.”
“Yeah. She’s um…she’s been my tutor for over a decade. Almost two. Uh, before my whole ‘runs off through the portal’ thing, anyway.” The words dragged their heels as they shuffled out of her throat, at first, but the more she spoke, the more easily Sunset felt the words come to her. She’d never talked about this before, and now that she’d begun, she couldn’t bring herself to stop. “She has a school of magic, in Equestria. That’s how she found me to start with, I had a um…I was different from the other foals in my class. The kind of magic that came to me was more natural, more…more free-flowing. My relationship with my magic’s always been a little different from everyone else’s like that. She says my force of will is remarkable. It impressed her, and she wanted to nurture that. Guide it.”
When Sunset glanced up, she saw Luna simply watching her, waiting attentively. Some of that curiosity was still on her face. By now her arms had uncrossed and hands had been folded in front of her, patiently awaiting whatever came next.
Sunset swallowed and looked back out at the courtyard. “...so…yeah, I’ve kinda always been under her wing. When she’d taught me everything a classroom could about magic, my studies broadened. Things became more general, but then they narrowed again, focusing on statecraft and managing people. I learned a lot about how to open doors, and how to make use of some of the opportunities that had been left available to me, as Celestia’s student. Meanwhile she taught me about making decisions that would affect other people. She taught me about why people rallied, and when they did, what they looked for, what they needed, examples to set…things like that. Needs people have, how to fulfill them…then like, if I can’t fill them, how to find someone that can, how to move cogs that won’t turn on their own…the sorts of things to look for when I’m delegating tasks, how to surround myself with people that know more than I do about something…”
“How to lead.”
“How to lead, yeah.” Sunset nodded, smiling a little as she did. She was well into the nostalgia trip by now. “I hit a slump for a while there, but then she told me what the plan was. I was going to inherit a kingdom one day.”
Luna’s eyebrows arched. “Did you not know from the start?”
“I didn’t.” Sunset shook her head, and both her eyes and voice began to become increasingly animate as she went on. “How exciting, though, isn’t it? Isn’t that just the- isn’t that the most crazy thing? To finally know your calling? To have someone put them to words, after having spent a lifetime wondering? Such an insanely important task, and to have someone tell you that they’ve known from the very beginning that this was something I’d be good at? That I was practically born for?” She was at a loss for words briefly, looking down as a grin spread across her face. She gazed into her open hands like the keys to her destiny had been placed in them. Her eyes practically shone, and her voice was low, almost reverent. Even now it moved her. “What an honor. What a…a…”
“What a burden.” Luna’s voice was far more measured. Cautious, even. “That’s a mighty burden to have to bear.”
Sunset’s hands closed, balling into light fists. “It was.” Her smile waned, replaced with something harder. Something determined. “But it was something to live for. I hadn’t really…I didn’t have that before, but I did then. I finally had a goal. I could focus.” Her fists tightened. “I knew what I was meant to do, and I was determined to do it right. My entire life had led up to this, I needed to make it work. I had to.”
And then she didn’t.
Sunset’s fists continued to tighten. She watched this happen, and after observing her hands for a few more moments, she slowly unclenched them. She opened her hands, then closed them again, closing them into looser fists and repeating this motion a couple times as she took a couple of quiet, steadying breaths. Her chest was tight. “Um,” she began, somewhat lamely- more than a little actually. She chuckled quietly at herself. “I uh…I think I distracted myself from your question.”
Luna merely shrugged, mirroring the gesture with her hands at the same. She had one of those familiar, welcoming smiles on her face. “My question was answered. I found the detour rather interesting to listen to.”
“Sorry.”
“No need to apologize,” she assured gently. “As I said, I found it interesting. It’s nice to learn more about where you came from after having gotten to know you these last few weeks.”
Sunset chuckled quietly to herself as she pointed her gaze out the window, feeling a little awkward. The students outside were something to focus on, at least. ”…well uh…stick around I guess. I ramble about my life and home randomly, sometimes.”
“It sounds like you’ve a lot to say.” Luna quit leaning on the counter and strode over to the table in the middle of the room, where her work was assembled. “Should you decide you’d like to share in the future, I’ll gladly listen.”
“Um…yeah.” Sunset nodded, keeping her eyes out the window rather than at Luna. Her foot bobbed and caused her whole leg to rhythmically bounce up and down with anxious energy. “Noted.”
Conversation petered out from there. Luna went back to the work she was usually doing during this little cover operation they ran here, though she seemed to spend more time staring at or through her laptop in thought than normal. Sunset decided that she didn’t want to do what most would consider “productive” or “on-task” today. She remained at the window for most of the detention, eying the students outside or simply zoning out and letting her mind wander.
Among other things, Sunset considered telling Luna about more things in the future - things she wouldn’t tell most people, but realized then as she had realized in the past and then forgot that it felt nice to share. She didn’t get to talk about her life much, either because it just didn’t come up or she wouldn’t let herself. Maybe that should change.
…maybe. She’d think about it.
Much like the hours leading up to it, detention hour came and went. Sunset collected her things (easy to do, considering she never opened her backpack), said a brief farewell to Luna, and went to leave.
“Oh, Sunset?”
Sunset was mid-step out the door when she leaned back into the room to answer. “Yeah?”
“In the future, if you ever feel the need to escape somewhere during school hours, please let me know.” It was said pleasantly enough, though to Sunset’s ears it felt like a reprimand. “That way we can arrange something a little easier to keep tidy for the record’s sake, and possibly address whatever issue you’re having while we’re at it.”
It was about then that Sunset recalled how she’d spent fourth period that day. She nodded, trying to not look or sound scolded. “Okay.”
“Thank you.” Luna smiled that resting smile she so often wore at ease. “Will you be needing a ride?”
It took Sunset a second or two to register the question. “Uh, I got a couple things to do, but I can walk. I’ll make my way over to your place eventually.”
Luna nodded as her attention went back to the laptop and papers in front of her. “I’ll leave a key under the welcome mat, if you need it.”
“Okay, cool.” Sunset hesitated in case there was more, but that seemed like the end of it. “I’ll uh-” She began to un-lean from the room. “I’ll see you tonight, then.”
“Have a good night, Sunset.”
And she left.
Sunset wasn’t in a hurry as she walked down the hall away from the old chemistry lab. She knew what came next, and while she’d had ample time to come to terms with it, she still wasn’t looking forward to it. Some nameless fear left her footsteps increasingly hesitant as she rounded the corner, though her nerve was strong enough that she was able to keep a steady pace as she moved towards the front door of the school and, eventually, stepped through them.
It was slightly over an hour after school had gotten out that day, so unsurprisingly, the crowd of kids and any lingering groups that had been out here earlier were long gone. The parking lot was almost totally empty save for a handful of stray vehicles, most of which were faculty’s. It was always odd seeing the school so barren, no matter how many times Sunset saw it like this.
It only took Sunset a moment or two to find Twilight Sparkle. She’d moved from in front of the statue to over on one of the benches in one of the half-circle blocks of grass carved out by the drive for the buses in front of the school. That wasn’t much of a surprise, though slightly more surprising was the company she kept. Rainbow Dash was the only other person around right now, seated next to Twilight, though stretched out to take up far more than her fair share of space in a very relaxed-looking pose. Twilight didn’t seem to mind at all, who looked fully bundled up for winter and had her head back with her eyes closed.
Sunset hesitated to approach, though ironically the presence of Rainbow Dash was striking enough to her that the weirdness of it distracted from the anxiety of approaching. She thus found it a bit easier to walk up to the two of them, keeping her footsteps about as quiet as possible, though not enough to keep either head from turning in her direction as she closed the gap. “What’re you doing out here?”
“Uh, waiting for you?” It could have sounded accusatory if not for the smirk Rainbow wore when she said it. “Did you fall asleep in there or something?”
“I left as soon as I was released,” Sunset replied in a measured tone. “They don’t like it when you leave early.”
It was here that Twilight perkily joined the conversation: “What’s important is that you’re here now!”
“Yeah, as opposed to like, this mo-oof-“ Rainbow’s remark was cut off by a lavender elbow to her ribs.
“You’re here now!” Twilight repeated, sounding almost aggressively cheerful with a stiff smile. “And that’s all that matters.”
Sunset couldn’t completely repress the smile that the sight of Rainbow Dash rubbing her side inspired. She played it off by adopting an easygoing stance, shifting her weight to one leg. “Yeah well, glad to be here and all, but you guys didn’t have to wait outside for me this whole time. It’s cold out here.”
“Oh, that’s no trouble.” Twilight pat herself across her torso, indicating the dark teal coat that Sunset couldn’t decide whether it was meant to be a coat or a sweater, or some weird combination of the two. Whatever it was, it looked rather warm. “I’m pretty set for this weather. Besides, it’s nice to enjoy a little fresh air!”
“And a runny nose.”
“Bah,” Twilight waved both hands dismissively at the matter. “It’s nothing. I’m just enjoying being human again!”
Sunset refrained from commenting on this - both on the human thing and how it was kind of bullshit that the portal had seen fit to shit out an entire winter outfit for Twilight while Sunset had been out here freezing her ass off for weeks. Definitely not high key annoyed by that little detail. Sunset instead channeled her annoyance to give Rainbow Dash an inquisitive look and like her presence here was weird. Because it was. “Shouldn't you be home by now? Everyone else’s long gone.”
Rainbow Dash prickled. “What, and leave Twilight out here all by herself? You can’t just leave a girl completely alone in the middle of the city.”
“It’s broad daylight,” Sunset pointed out. “And it’s Canterlot. And she’s like ten feet from the school.”
“So?! The city’s a city and the school’s like, totally empty right now! What do cameras matter if you get stuffed in a van and you’re gone?!”
Twilight cut in front of Sunset's next comment with a warm, “It’s appreciated.” She gave Rainbow Dash a thankful pat on the arm, who started to preen. “Besides, it’s been nice to have some company. There’s a lot to catch up on!” Twilight clapped her hands together as she hopped to her feet, turning to more fully face Sunset with a beaming expression. “Speaking of which: Sunset!”
“That’s the name, don’t wea- h-hey.” Sunset shied back as Twilight sprang towards her, half expecting the girl to throw her arms around her for a moment. “Easy there,” she chuckled anxiously.
“Sorry! Sorry I’m just- gosh I’ve got so much I want to say to you! You look good!”
“Uh, thank you.” Sunset rubbed the back of her neck, trying to not look like that meant very little to her. Twilight obviously had no idea what a human that ‘looked good’ looked like. That or Sunset didn’t look anywhere near as crummy as she felt most of the time, which she wasn’t super sure about. “You look, uh…” Sunset briefly eyed Twilight up and down once with eyes only. “…human.”
“Well I certainly hope I look human,” Twilight giggled. “Otherwise I think we’d have a problem on our hooves!”
It was a small thing, but hearing a ‘hooves’ slip-up in human company from someone that wasn’t her was a salient point for Sunset, and it put her at ease enough for just a moment to let out a proper laugh at Twilight’s joke. “Yeah, no kidding. I dunno know though, I think it might end well. I know at least one girl who’d probably enjoy seeing a pony in person.”
Rainbow Dash snorted at this. ”Fluttershy would lose her shit.”
“Probably!” Twilight chimed as Sunset chuckled. “I suspect ponies are a lot smaller in stature than humans are, so I can see her taking a liking to us pretty easily.”
“We would not get out of it without getting our manes brushed.”
“Definitely not,” Twilight agreed, sharing a chuckle with Sunset. “That could be fun! Ignoring all the problems it could cause, of course.”
“Of course.” Sunset nodded. She crossed her arms as she let out a wistful sigh at the thought of such a scenario. “Idunno, I think it would be really nice to be a pony again, even if I had to like, hide for a while before we fixed it. I miss my horn.”
Twilight’s hand went to her forehead, the sensation of which made her recoil slightly with a grimace. “Yeesh I forgot how weird that feels…” She did it again, the grimace shifting back and forth as she probed the smooth space beneath her bangs where a horn would normally be protruding. She could only handle it for a few more seconds before she pulled her hand away like she had been touching something slimy with her bare skin. “Yeah that’s weird! Yeah I don’t like that so much, actually. Thanks for reminding me about it!”
Sunset snapped up a pair of lazy finger guns Twilight's way with a coy grin. “Enjoy your next three days as a human. Don’t think about how sweaty feet get, either.”
A beat. “Wow, you are still evil, huh?”
“Damn right I am,” Sunset laughed. “And don’t you forget it, either!”
“…aaand on that note-“ Rainbow Dash hopped to her feet, speaking over Twilight’s groaning and Sunset’s snickering. “Imma call my dad and get that whole thing set up? Enjoy talking about sweaty feet.”
Sunset didn’t know what she meant by that, but Twilight was outraged. “You’re going to abandon me now?!”
“Sure am!” Rainbow Dash pulled her phone out of her pocket as she started to stroll away. “Cuz it’s gettin’s weird over here. Peace!”
“WOW, alright! Abandon me in my hour of greatest need, why don’t you?! Greatest need! ” To this Twilight merely got a peace sign flashed her way, making Twilight huff and cross her arms in a pout only royalty could manage. “I take back all the praise I’ve sung about them. Humans are dumb and lame.”
Sunset shrugged out her arms in a ‘whattya gonna do?’ manner. She eyed Rainbow Dash briefly as she exited earshot and let her curiosity get the better of her. “You got plans over there, or..?”
Twilight pouted a little longer before she loosened up a bit where she had been scrunched up, her dramaticized expression ebbing quickly. “Yeah, I’m going to be staying with her while I’m here, I guess. Or, um,” Twilight turned her head to look at where Rainbow Dash went with uncertainty, “that’s what it sounds like.”
Sunset glanced at where Rainbow Dash had wandered off to, then back at Twilight again, eyebrow arching. “Doesn’t sound like a plan.”
Twilight smiled sheepishly. “Well,” she chuckled, “originally I was going to go back to Equestria in between visits while the portal’s open, but then I…so, funny story-“ Twilight leaned forward as she twiddled her fingers about, sounding increasingly like a filly who’d just been caught out on a lie or something. “-so while I was here the first time, I may have spent a night or two in the school library? And I may have told her about that.”
“And she flipped out.”
“She may have flipped out,” Twilight admitted. “And then she announced that I’d be crashing at her place, and-“ Twilight fumbled this a little, gesticulating vaguely for a few moments before she threw her hands out in defeat and let them fall back to her lap. “I don’t know, I kind of just want to make her feel better. Like she’s helping, you know? It’s sweet of her, so…” She looked over at Rainbow Dash, who was well away from them by now and talking on the phone by the fence. “I can probably move a few things around to make that work.”
Sunset didn’t say anything. She saw the silence coming from a mile away, and she let it happen, simply crossing her arms and casting her gaze in the opposite direction Rainbow Dash had wandered.
After a time, there was a quick pair of taps of a palm against wood. Sunset glanced at Twilight and found her looking at her, smiling invitingly as she moved her hand from the space next to her on the bench. Sunset stared for several moments, eyes shifting from Twilight to the spot beside her, then back and forth once more before she drifted over to that spot and took a seat, motions slow and careful. She crossed one leg over the other shortly after settling in.
Conversation did not ignite immediately after this. Sunset spent a moment examining Twilight until Twilight looked at her, at which point her gaze deflected and the silence started feeling awkward.
“So,” Twilight started, sounding to Sunset like she was putting on her professional voice, “I hear you’ve been having a little trouble settling in.”
Here we go. Sunset bit back a sigh. “Little bit.”
Twilight nodded. There was a note of solemnity in her voice as she said, “I had hoped it would be easy, but I guess that wasn’t gonna happen, huh?”
Sunset shrugged. A direction not in Twilight’s felt like a decent place to be looking right now. “Yup.”
“What sort of thing has been giving you trouble?”
Sunset felt her lips part to speak, but no part of the process of forming words followed, so they closed again.
Twilight waited, though when it became clear a response wasn’t coming, she went on, undeterred. “Sorry for scaring you earlier, by the way. I uh…” She chuckled anxiously, brushing a lock of hair out of her eyes as she did. “I probably could have done a better job of broadcasting my arrival before just kind of, um, y’know…showing up.”
Sunset shrugged one shoulder at this, maintaining her gaze elsewhere. “Sorry for ditching you.”
“That’s okay! We’re here now, right?”
In a sense, perhaps. Sunset found her engagement slipping as time passed.
After another silence, Twilight tried again to overcome it. “…well, it sounds to me like in spite of the trouble you’ve been having, you’ve still managed to get some friends out of it.”
Sunset didn’t know whether or not this was a topic to relax about. She chose caution for now. “One or two.”
“Sounds like exactly two to me!” Sunset could feel Twilight’s smile in the side of her head. “Fluttershy and Rarity, huh?”
Sunset nodded. “Yeah.”
“Very good choices. Rarity’s the most giving person I know, and Fluttershy’s…well,” Twilight chuckled. “Need I say more? She’s Fluttershy.”
“She is Fluttershy.” Sunset cracked the smallest smile at this. “They’ve both been really good to me.”
“What made you decide to trust them?”
Sunset considered whether or not she wanted to answer this. Eventually she decided that it couldn’t hurt, so she went on, if somewhat slowly. “Well, um…I just uh…I just started talking to Rarity at one point, and it was fun. We got along really well, and, uh…things just kinda…just kinda went from there.”
“She sounded surprised that you decided to talk to her when you did.”
“Yeah I was uh, I was surprised too, a little bit. It was a…” Sunset rolled her wrist as she looked for the words. “Spur of the moment thing. I don’t remember what I was thinking at the time. Honestly, it was kinda stupid of me. I woke her up at like, two in the morning or some shit.”
“Yikes.”
“Bit of a yikes out of ten, yeah, can confirm.”
Twilight giggled. “Paid off though, huh?”
Sunset’s thoughts only briefly touched on the intimate longing she felt for Rarity before she metaphorically reached out with a hand and applied it to its face, intent on keeping it and anything pertaining to it well beyond arm’s reach for this conversation. “Something like that.”
“Very good!” Twilight clapped her hands together at this as she bounced in her seat briefly, once again all smiles. “What about Fluttershy?”
“Oh, um…” Sunset had to stop and think about how she and Fluttershy had started talking. They didn’t hit it off immediately like she and Rarity did, so it took a moment to map things out. “She wanted to know if I wanted a random movie ticket her brother gave her. I don’t remember the specifics, but, uh…she seemed lonely, and it bothered me, so uh…so we started sitting together in her car listening to music.”
Twilight let out a little ‘aww’ noise. “That’s sweet.”
Sunset shrugged, giving off a small embarrassed smile. “I was sick of sitting by myself every morning, Idunno. We weren’t friends yet.”
“But you are now, right?”
“Yeah, definitely.” Sunset nodded emphatically as she said this. “I’m over at her house a lot. We play a lot of video games and she lets me crash at her place on the weekends, and…y’know, off and on, kinda whenever.” A beat. “…well I guess her parents are the ones letting me do it, but- y’know.”
Twilight clapped her hands together repeatedly, letting loose an especially girly giggle that even Twilight Sparkle wasn’t femme enough for that to sound normal. “Perfect! Oh that’s exactly what I was hoping for! Very good, very very good! Good job, Sunset.”
“Um…thank you?” It sounded unsure when Sunset said it. “I don’t know if it’s like, celebration -worthy or anything, though.“
“Oh don’t be ridiculous,” Twilight dismissed, like she wasn’t the one who looked ready to football cheer over hearing that Sunset had the skeleton of the fundamentals of a life. “Friendship of all things is worth celebrating. If I can’t get excited about emotional bonds forming between people I care about, what even is there to get excited about? That is the thing to be happy for, in my mind.”
“If you say so, dude.” Sunset briefly hesitated, then decided to say what she’d been tempted to a moment prior. “All I know is if this is how you get about sleepovers, I don’t even wanna know what would happen if we kissed.”
Twilight gave Sunset a suspicious look, narrowing her eyes at her. “And what’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means I think you’re shipping trash.”
The response of, “Oh buck you,” was so knee-jerk and instantaneous that Sunset was pretty sure Twilight’s brain cells hadn’t even registered the words before the response was being spat back at her from sheer instinct. It was also confirmation in Sunset’s mind that this wasn’t the first time she’d heard it. “I’m not a shipper! I just like it when my friends get along.”
Sunset replied with as much disbelief as she could compact into a single intonation of, “Mhm.”
“I don’t! I mean I do! Like it when you get along! And nothi- nothing else! Nothing w- oh buck off.” Twilight crossed her arms and petulantly looked away from Sunset with an industrial-grade pout on her face. “Fine, I hope you get coal instead of a birthday cake this year and that you celebrate it all by yourself. How’s that sound?”
“Ah, my favorite flavor.” Sunset couldn’t completely arrest the chuckles that worked their way up her throat. “Perfect, thanks.”
Twilight was visibly trying to maintain the scowl, but as Sunset started laughing, she wasn’t completely able to hold it together herself, and her voice was fracturing as she spat out, “Jerk.”
Sunset threw her arms out with a grin. “Mald about it! I got free coal cake. Screw you guys, I got mine.”
“You’re a jerk.” Twilight couldn’t hold up the facade anymore and was freely giggling away. “Nevermind, I changed my vote: a pox on your house.”
“Joke’s on you, bitch, I already got sick.” That was meant to be part of a joke, but Sunset was laughing and halfway through she lost the train of thought, so instead she just enjoyed the moment.
They laughed for a little while. It probably wasn’t even all that funny, but there was a sense of relief that came with it as a big chunk of the tension between them rattled free and was carried off by the late autumn-early winter wind, allowing the giggling and laughter to carry farther on its own power than it might have otherwise been able to. They came to a stop before long to the tune of a pair of pleasant sighs, though the silence that followed wasn’t nearly as oppressive as it had been leading up to this.
After a few seconds of taking in the quiet, it was Twilight who broke it first. Her head fell back where she sat, and in a voice like her worst fear had been put to rest, she breathed out, “I am so glad we can talk.”
Sunset looked at her as she placed her arm on the back of the bench they were sitting at. “Yeah?”
Twilight nodded where she’d let her head fall back. “I was so nervous that like-“ She brought her head forward so she could better rub her eyes with both hands. “-that I was going to walk up to you and try to be friends, and you were going to laugh, or like, bite my head off for trying. This is so much nicer.”
Sunset tapped her hand against the back of the bench as she bobbed her head this way and that. “I mean…I dunno, I might have, if you’d shown up like a month ago.” A beat. “…maybe.” Sunset cast her gaze elsewhere. Nowhere in particular, just elsewhere. “I dunno. I barely know what I’m feeling most of the time.”
“…well that…doesn't sound great.” Twilight leaned forward, looking at Sunset with concern and compassion in equal measure. “Are you doing alright out here? I know that a lot has happened, and…how are you holding up? Like, really holding up?”
It wasn’t a question that Sunset would have given as much consideration as she ended up doing if not for the specifics of the moment. It felt like they were being real right now, and Sunset was inclined to be real back. She’d not given an especially real answer about this before, though, so she had to think about it. Like, really think about it.
Fortunately, Twilight was patient here. It probably helped that the consideration was painted all over Sunset’s face, so rather than prompt her or try to keep things moving, she waited.
Finally, Sunset had gathered her thoughts enough that she was willing to try to respond. She raised her hands in front of her as the start of some gesture, and she asked, “Have you ever felt like you’re not…like, has something ever happened to you where you walked away from it, but afterwards you don’t really feel like a person anymore? Like, you’re alive, but not a person?”
To her credit, Twilight tried to answer this, but it was apparent by the look on her face how she was going to answer well before she did. “I can’t say I have, no.”
“Right.” Sunset didn’t really expect her to get it; she was halfway trying to get it herself as she walked through it. This was equally for her own sake as it was Twilight’s. “Well…that’s how I feel. I feel like I was a stain on the floor, and I managed to like, get up afterwards, but-” She gestured out with her hands, like she was holding armfuls of something in front of her stomach, “-but I’m still carrying so much of myself from when I was just getting up to walk away. There’s tons of me here that I’m carrying around here , instead of-” She brought her hands up to her chest and stomach, pressing them flat there. “-here, as like, actually part of me. And like…” She gestured to herself, shaking her head a little. “I’m…okay. I’m not going to fall apart right now. I can get through the day today, and, y’know, maybe a lot of days after this, but this is just…this is just me being alive. I-” She motioned like she was holding bits of herself in front of her, “-am still here. You know? And I don’t- I don’t know how to get what’s here-” the hands went to her chest and stomach, “-back in here again. I’m…” She searched for words a bit, grasping at the air like she was searching for the piece she needed, then let her hands fall down into her lap. “I feel like a pulse. I don’t wanna be a pulse. I want to be a person, and I don’t know if I remember how to be one anymore. I don’t know what to do.”
There were a lot of emotions on Twilight’s face as she listened. It was a heavy topic, and that heaviness was apparent, as was a growing sadness as she listened to Sunset tell her she felt broken as earnestly as she was. Twilight nodded along the whole way through, and when Sunset was done, she let the silence hang for a good while before she ever spoke up: “I’m really sorry that you’re going through this, Sunset. I’m even more sorry when I say that I don’t think I’ve got the answers for you.”
Sunset didn’t expect answers. It would have been nice to get them, though. She turned her hands over as though to check if there were any such answers beneath them and, failing to find anything but her own worn-out jeans, let them fall back in place again with a bleak smile.
“...I may be able to give a little advice, though. Maybe not…maybe not the kind of advice you need right this moment, but something that can get you started somewhere. You know?”
Sunset lifted her hands up again, though finding nothing different, she let them fall in place again. “Up to you,” she mumbled. Speaking in general felt a lot harder with the weight that had settled over her. “I’ll take what I can get.”
“Okay.” Twilight cleared her throat quietly, sitting up a little bit straighter as she clasped her hands together atop her thighs. She observed her own thumbs as she twiddled them, contemplating whatever she meant to say with a great amount of focus, and after a short time like that she took in a breath and spoke clearly: “I don’t know your opinion on some things, so this might come off as demeaning, or maybe dismissive, or super obvious, but I want you to know that I’m being very thoughtful and serious when I say this, okay?”
Always a good start. Sunset had to bite back the urge to turn those thoughts into words, though she couldn’t stop the small, slightly bitter smirk as she shook her head to herself. “Lay it on me.”
“I think you should see a therapist.”
An ugly snort bubbled up from the back of Sunset’s throat, which kept coming as waves of quiet chuckling. “A therapist,” she repeated, stating the words with a deadpan kind of awe.“You want me to see a therapist.”
“Yes.” There wasn’t a trace of humor or amusement on Twilight’s face. She was, in fact, dead serious, and she sallied forth to meet the almost mocking incredulity with complete frankness. “You said it yourself: you don’t know what to do. I think you should find a professional who can help you figure it out.”
Sunset continued to chuckle that bleak, humorless laughter. “Pray tell, Princess,” she started, opening her arms slowly, inviting a response, “where the buck am I supposed to find someone to talk to about this? How am I- where would even start with this? I can’t be honest with humans about what happened. I’d be lying out my ass the entire time just so they wouldn’t laugh me out of the room.”
“What about other ponies?”
The chuckling stopped dead in its tracks.
“Come home.” Twilight’s voice started firm, but it was quickly becoming soft enough that Sunset could sleep on it if she rested her head against it. “Come back to Equestria with me. You don’t have to stay, just- just come home for a little while. Long enough to get some help.”
Sunset struggled to process this. Her fists were frozen halfway through clenching, her expression reflecting the way she was torn straight down the middle about three or four different ways about this prospect that had been thrust at her. There was anger in there, certainly, but there were some other things too. Things that were about as lost on what to feel as she was.
After several seconds, her fists completed clenched. They were tight, but they weren’t a bone-crushing vice, just…tight. Tense. A pursed frown formed on Sunset’s face as she ran this suggestion through her head again, then again. When she spoke, her voice was stiff, but steady: “I’m a traitor.”
“No charges were pressed.”
This didn’t register at first. She heard the words, and she could intuit that they meant something, but she couldn’t fathom what they could mean. After a few seconds, Sunset lifted her head to look at Twilight and asked, completely at a loss, “What?”
“No charges were pressed,” Twilight repeated. “The courts haven’t gotten involved here.”
As before, Sunset could understand on an intellectual level that the words that had been spoken to her just now had meaning, and that she could technically understand each of them, but when arranged like they were, it just…it didn’t connect. She didn’t understand. She blanked, hard, opening her mouth a slight like offering the chance for words of her own to occur, just for the sound of silence to fill her ajar mouth.
She didn’t get it. Couldn’t get it. She was stunned.
“But…” Sunset didn’t recognize her own voice when it eventually crept out of her throat. “But I- the Element of Magic-”
“Was returned,” Twilight filled in, patient and calm. “Equestria was just fine, and no one got hurt. Things could have gotten bad, but they didn’t, and…I mean, it’s not like you had no remorse about it afterwards.” Twilight offered a supportive smile, tempered slightly by the gravity of everything being discussed. “Why does anything need to go further than that? You needed friends and support, not prosecution. You still need friends and support.”
There were implications here. There were vast implications to what was being said to her, and at that moment, Sunset was equipped to understand precisely none of them. She could feel her world swaying beneath her where it had been struck, but she didn’t see the impact, or even begin to comprehend.
Sunset felt numb. She licked her lips, sort of feeling it, but also sort of not. In a voice that still didn’t feel like her own, she replied so unsteadily that it somehow looped back around to sounding steady again: “I see.”
Twilight nodded. She was searching Sunset’s face for something, and it wasn’t clear if she found what she was looking for or not, just that from then on her voice sounded much softer on Sunset’s ears. “I’m going to be in this world for three days, counting today. If you need more time after that, the portals open every full moon, so there’s no time limit here.” Twilight’s smile was as warm as her voice sounded. “Just think about it for me, okay?”
Sunset nodded limply.
“Okay.” Twilight leaned over towards Sunset and placed one arm around her shoulders, giving her a light but heartfelt hug. She encountered no resistance. “I care about you and support you, Sunset. Don’t ever forget that.”
Sunset knew she meant that. It took her a moment, but she returned the one-armed hug as best she could while only halfway feeling her own limbs. She heard Rainbow Dash say something nearby, and while Sunset didn’t know when she’d come back, she also didn’t really have it in her to care. Apparently all Rainbow Dash and Twilight had to do now was wait for Rainbow Dash’s father to arrive. Sunset would not be doing that, and she separated from the pair with a mumbled farewell.
Sunset didn’t know where she was going when she stepped away, just that away was indeed what she needed and that it was all she wanted. Her head would be filled with the equivalent of television static for the rest of the evening.
There had been many times in Sunset’s life where she had made decisions one might describe as ‘impulse-driven.’ The dial tone in her ear was the result of one such decision.
There were no lights on in her room, nor had there been for many hours, as what candles she had were currently extinguished. Her phone had a light, of course, but she couldn’t see much more of it but a line where the lower corner of her right periphery was slightly aglow from the screen where it rested lightly against her cheek.
The bed beneath her was unmade, but she wasn’t in it, laying atop it. She had tried sleeping once, but she wasn’t tired. No position felt comfortable, either. Her sea green eyes gazed up into nothing, staring past the darkness that enveloped the ceiling above her, listening to the monotonous note play in her ear, followed by silence, then again. Back and forth it went, presumably ringing on the other end, or at least vibrating. Sunset had no way to know if someone heard it. She wouldn’t until they answered, or it flipped to voicemail.
At one point, Sunset had wondered what she was doing right now. There was no plan. There were no expectations - she couldn’t have them, she barely knew what she was doing, and hadn’t thought this through at all. There was a good chance this would go nowhere, or just annoy someone. She could just hang up now if she wanted to, hit the red button and wave this away as having rolled over onto her phone or something with an apology that likely wouldn’t be seen as being as insincere as it would be. Applejack would notice, but probably drop it and then forget about it. This could all go away still. The longer she waited on the line, the lower the odds of that happening…yet similarly higher, if no one answered. The whole thing could just erase itself, if she was lucky.
Thoughts came, and like this one, they passed. Sunset did not touch on them for long, merely acknowledging their existence as they went by, waving her down for attention that she did not spare them. She was still and silent, gazing at the ceiling she couldn’t see, listening to the note play over and over in her ear in the dark.
She wasn’t sure how long it took - a while, longer than it probably should have. The dial tone suddenly stopped, and from the faint crackling and random noise coming from the other end for several seconds, she could tell it wasn’t voicemail. The voice on the other end was barely recognizable, as thick with grogginess as it was, but it was still vaguely recognizable as Rarity. “Hello?”
It felt strange to hear Rarity like this. It was a ping in Sunset’s mind, a reminder that this was unusual, and not wise. Too late now though. “Hey, Rarity.”
There was a long second of silence on the other end - Sunset could hear the groggy blinking in it. “Who is this..?”
“It’s Sunset.”
“Sunset?”
Sunset nodded, as though Rarity might see.
There was a faint sound of fabric rustling on the other end, and another second before Rarity’s bleary voice came through again. “Darling, it’s…why are you calling me?”
Sunset, to her credit, opened her mouth to respond. Her mouth closed again after a few moments, and remained that way for a few moments more. There wasn’t much left but to come clean: “I don’t know.”
There was no response from Rarity’s end.
Sunset let her eyes slip closed. She didn’t think, simply closed her eyes and experienced the passage of time. Seconds passed by. She didn’t count them.
It took a while, but eventually a response did come - a sigh, laden with static as Rarity breathed slightly into the speaker. “Alright…” While still obviously tired and more than likely having been just woken up, some of the haze in her tone was gone, making way for something that sounded equal parts worried and stern, but still mostly tired. “What’s this about, Sunset?”
Sunset licked her dry lips before she answered: “I don’t know.”
“You don’t know.” It was a statement, not a question.
Sunset nodded. This time she actually spoke instead of leaving Rarity with silence, however: “Yeah.”
“Do you realize what time it is right now?”
“Not really.” She had an idea, but she wasn’t sure.
“Too early for calling up your friends for no reason, that’s for certain. It’s…” There was a pause. “…it’s three forty one.”
Sunset didn’t reply.
Rarity seemed to be waiting for something. It didn’t come, though, and there was a second sigh on the other end of the line, this one more haggard. “Darling,” Rarity said, now wearing her worry openly in her voice, “are you okay?”
As before, Sunset didn’t reply.
“Sunset?” Rarity prompted, urgency faint but nonetheless audible. “Are you okay?”
Sunset took in a breath, slowly. She felt the cavernous weight pull against the inside of her ribs as her lungs expanded, trying to push it back down, though it made it no easier to breathe it back out again. “I don’t know,” she repeated.
The frown was audible on the other end. “Sunset, you’re scaring me. Are you safe?”
“Yeah- yes, yeah.” That came quickly, at least - a hand came up to her face as Sunset dragged it past her eyes and across her mouth, feeling a pang of guilt. “I’m safe. I’m…yeah.”
“Where are you right now?”
“My house.” A beat. “I guess.”
“You guess?”
Sunset emitted a noise that was equal parts scoff and chuckle at herself. It wasn’t really her house, what with not owning it or being legally permitted to live in it, but in a way, it was hers. Not that that really needed to get brought up now. “I’m at my house. Sorry.”
“You’re at your house right now?”
“Yes.”
“And you promise you’re safe?”
“Yes.”
“Say the words.” Rarity’s voice was soft still, but carried with it a quiet sternness that bore no room argument. “You promise me you’re safe?”
Sunset took in a breath, and spoke back clearly, “I promise you that I am safe, Rarity.”
There was a several second-long silence at this, comprised of Rarity…doing something. Inspecting the response for sincerity, maybe. She had since begun to sound much more alert, though fatigue still lingered faintly in her voice when she did speak again. “I’m glad, darling, but…why are you calling? It’s nearly 4 AM on a Monday morning. Clearly something’s wrong.”
Enough sense had been spurred into her by now that Sunset knew better than to keep answering with vagueness and non-answers. Rarity deserved answers at this point…which was problematic, given that she herself wasn’t quite sure of them. “I guess…” she began, gears in her head turning over as she processed this. It took a few seconds, and it was not coming more clearly than before, but she needed to present something for an explanation. “I guess I’m…just…”
Rarity did not interrupt. Judging by the quiet and the sense that the other girl got through it, she would wait as long as was necessary. She was worried, and alert, and waiting diligently as a good friend would, and really did not deserve to be going through this right now.
Sunset swallowed the lump that formed her her throat. “I just needed to talk to somepony.”
There was a beat before Rarity asked, “What about?”
“I don’t know.”
“Just talk?”
“Yeah.”
“Well…” There was a rustling again, overlaid by a soft sigh. “I suppose it’s not the worst hour I’ve ever been roused at…and there are certainly worse ways to burn some time than talking with a friend.”
“You don’t have to.”
“Oh I’m aware, darling,” Rarity said chidingly, “but I’m not so heartless as to leave you hanging in a time of crisis.”
“Ehh…” Sunset scrunched her nose and wavered her hand back and forth in a ‘so-so’ manner, as though the girl on the other end could see. “I don’t know if I’d say ‘crisis.’”
“Well on what other occasions do you call up a friend at 4 am because you need someone to talk to?” came the wry response.
“…fair point.” Sunset sighed. “I don’t know.”
“Seems you don’t know many things, tonight.”
Sunset didn’t reply to that. She couldn’t exactly disagree.
The silence lasted a few seconds longer before Rarity asked, “What’s on your mind right now, darling?”
Sunset took a moment to observe her thoughts before reporting back: “You.”
“Ohoho~ …”
“N-not like that,” Sunset added quickly, though by that sound Rarity had made, she knew it was too late. “I’m not like, thinking much? But you’re talking, and, I’m, you know, I was thinking about it…”
“So you could say I’m all you can think about right now~?” The eyelashes fluttering could practically be heard.
“Not quite how I’d-“ The sound that met Sunset’s ear was equal parts giggle and purr, and Sunset sighed, slapping one hand over her face as she shook her head, smiling despite herself. “Harmony’s sake, Rarity.”
“No no, please, do go on~ I am ever so curious as to the true depths of your feelings, darling.”
“I think you’re a pain when you want to be.”
The aghast sound was almost believable enough to make Sunset think she’d genuinely offended Rarity. Almost. “I have absolutely no idea what you’re saying! I’m delightful company, I’ll have you know! And I know you agree, because you’re the one who called me at 4 AM because you couldn’t stand another moment without my company!”
“You’re right, you got me,” Sunset deadpanned, shaking her head as she smiled into the darkness. “I truly cannot bear a second more without you being there. My love for you, it is as radiant as my namesake. However could I be expected to be apart from you for a whole night’s time.”
“Well at least you’re honest about it.” The grin of Rarity’s was audible in her voice. “Never fear, darling, I shall bid you company in such trying times as these. I could never leave such longing unsated~“
“Such a generous partner in our lustful romance you are. Come, let us make out prodigiously with our voices.”
“Let us shall~“
The next several seconds were comprised solely of over-the-top kissing sounds being exchanged. Sunset tried to keep it together, but eventually she broke and began laughing, and once she did, Rarity joined in. Occasionally one of them would start trying to make noises again in earnest, but the cork on their laughter had already been popped, and neither of them could last much longer than a second or two before the snorting and giggling broke up the stream of sound effects. They laughed like a couple of idiots, and for a little while, that’s all they were: just two slightly delirious idiot friends setting one another off with silly noises at an hour where they should both really be asleep.
It felt good. Sunset’s spirits soared over the course of their pseudo-conversation, and for a while she let herself be a stupid filly again, drunk with laughter at something that wasn’t really all that funny, other than in the moment, where it was hysterical.
Sunset didn’t know how much time passed like that - she could find out easily, but that would involve removing the phone from her ear for just a moment, and that wasn’t acceptable. Eventually the laughter died down, and she lay there with one hand on her stomach, smiling up warmly at the ceiling. The silence yawned on, but neither girl much minded it. It was a comfortable silence, feeling almost fuzzy and warm - perfect for resting in.
“I hope I didn’t wake anyone just now,” Rarity mumbled. Sunset heard the sound of quiet movement on the other end of the line, and after several seconds of silence, she added, “I don’t see her light on…”
“Think we’re good?” Sunset asked.
Another second or two on Rarity’s end, followed by quiet movement again. A mattress squeaked. “I think so.”
Sunset sighed quietly. The comfortable silence moved back in, but it only could make itself at home for a few more seconds before Sunset spoke. “We should have a sleepover or something sometime.”
Sunset could feel the eyebrow quirk through the phone. “I didn’t think you were much of the sleepover-y type, if I may be honest.”
“I guess I’m not? I dunno.” Sunset shrugged to herself. “I guess I’m reminded of my fillyhood days. I had a couple of sleepovers when I lived in Canterlot, and it was a lot of fun. Younger me thought so, anyway.”
“The girls and I do occasionally have sleepovers…” Rarity hummed thoughtfully. “Well, nothing recent, not since our freshman year. We used to do them fairly often, once we could get out of the house on our own more routinely. A bit of a celebration of growing independence, I suppose you could call it.” Sunset didn’t say anything, so Rarity went on. “I know I wouldn’t mind having one again. It would be a nice change of pace. That and I could finally show off this lovely nightgown I got for Christmas last year~“
“Oh yeah?”
“Yes indeed.”
Sunset didn’t speak up, waiting for Rarity to go on. She did not, however, and a silence spread over the line. It perplexed Sunset, though a bit more so when she realized how pointed it felt. Like Rarity was waiting for something. “Uhh…are you going to tell me about it?”
“Possibly,” came the teasing response. “Are you going to ask?”
Sunset didn’t get it at first. She blinked owlishly, about to ask what she meant, but a moment later it clicked. “Really?”
“Go on~”
Sunset sighed in faux-annoyance. She was silently thankful that they never turned this into a video call, lest Rarity be egged on by the smile Sunset couldn’t completely repress. “Are you seriously going to make me ask, ‘What are you wearing?’”
“Oh I’d never make you do such a thing, that would be quite uncouth of me. But seeing as you asked–“
“Sun damn it, Rarity,” Sunset said, her attempted irate tone undermined by her chuckling as Rarity went on into explicit detail about her blue silken nightgown. To her credit, it did sound like a pretty well-made piece of clothing, though Rarity could make a handkerchief sound like it was fit for royalty if she set her mind to it and threw enough verbose terminology at it. She knew this because she had done such a thing. It was a plain white handkerchief, but it had been made out to be a piece of fabric touched by the gods. To this day, Sunset was not sure if she genuinely felt so strongly about it, or if she had been messing with them all. Knowing Rarity, both were just as likely.
“And what about you, darling?” Rarity’s minxish voice addressing her brought Sunset back into focus. “What are you wearing~?”
“Uhh.” Sunset looked down at herself. There was a moment where she considered whether she should actually say it, but she chose to regardless. “I’m actually not wearing anything.”
There was a long pause. After a while, an exasperated breath could be heard from Rarity. “Sunset, darling, we’re supposed to work our way up to that. You can’t just skip straight to it, that cuts out half of the excitement of the game. Have you ever heard of ‘foreplay?’”
“Have you ever been told you’re a menace to society?” Sunset quipped.
“Once or twice, by purely irreputable sources that have since been stricken from the records,” Rarity answered crisply. The minxish tone returned after: “Besides, society doesn’t have to know what goes on between us. I can keep a secret if you can.”
Sunset saw her opening, and went for it. “You sound weirdly intent on having phone sex with a horse.”
The sound Rarity made was very much one of a spittake- had she been drinking something, it likely would have been sprayed all over her phone. She protested profusely, though whatever she said to berate Sunset was lost to the sound of the unicorn’s own laughter filling her bedroom, drowning out her indignant friend. She could perfectly visualize the exact look on Rarity’s face in that moment, and it was enough to have the already slightly delirious girl in stitches once again for several minutes.
“Unbelievable,” Rarity huffed after a while, audibly trying to keep from contributing to the laughter. “Simply unbelievable. To think I was willing to open my heart up to you at this ungodly hour, and this is what you do to me…”
“It’s what you get for being lewd,” Sunset informed her, one wrong sound away from another fit of laughter.
“You’re taking far more enjoyment in this than I am,” Rarity snootily informed. “Besides, I’m not being lewd.”
A giggling fit was stifled before it could spread. “No, I’m pretty sure you’re being really lewd.”
“You’re the one who’s naked,” Rarity retorted.
“You’re the one who asked.”
“You’re the one who’s laughing.”
“I’m not laughing!” Sunset said, beginning to laugh once again, which made her laugh harder. “W-wait hold on, pause, this doesn’t count-“
“Mhm,” replied a smug Rarity, who simply listened to her friend start to crack up all over again. “Go on then, get it out of your system, it and your baseless accusations.”
And she did. By the end of it, Sunset felt lightheaded, and more than a little bit giddy from all this stupid laughing. A headache was starting to form from it as well, but Sunset was in much too good a mood to mind that dull ache where it was beginning to rise from her forehead. She was also starting to get rather tired - a consequence of having worn herself out throughout the course of this conversation and their antics.
“I think I see the sun,” Rarity mused past the faint stream of giggles that had begun to sputter out. “Happy sunrise, Sunset.”
Sunset snorted, and started giggling again. “Quit it, you’re doing that on purpose.”
“Doing what?” Rarity asked, entirely too innocently.
“I’m getting a headache from all this laughing.”
“Hardly the worst problem to have.” Rarity’s voice softened. “Besides…that must mean you feel better. Right?”
Sunset giggled again, and sighed as the last of the fit faded. “I do,” she said, the gratitude thick in her voice. “Thank you, Rarity.”
“Was that all it was? Loneliness?”
Sunset was quiet as she considered this. Those heavy feelings were nowhere to be found now, that crater in her chest having long since filled in, replaced with warm fuzzy feelings of having spent the better part of an hour chatting and laughing with a friend. “I think so.” The realization left her feeling suddenly sheepish, and she added, “Sorry. That wasn’t really worth waking you up for this early.”
“You don’t need to apologize, darling. You needed someone to be there, and I was happy to be there for you. Besides…” Rarity’s voice softened so much that it almost felt plush on Sunset’s ears. “I enjoy the sound of your laugh. You have a nice voice.”
The smile on Sunset’s face was involuntary. “You have a nice voice too,” she said, voice matching Rarity’s. “It’s nice to listen to.”
“I suppose we’ll simply have to talk more often then, hm?”
If her cellphone had a cord, Sunset would twirl it around her finger. “I wouldn’t mind that.”
“Me neither.”
“Talking to you is nice.”
“I’m happy you think so, darling. I feel the same way.”
“I’m glad.”
“Me too.”
A comfortable silence fell once again. Something about it felt different, though. Sunset let her eyes slip closed, listening to the faint, barely audible background noise of the speaker in her ear, transmitting the tracest amount of static that let her know that on the other end of this line, Rarity was there, listening in the same way that she was. She was relaxed, and oddly light. Feathery, almost. Just so comfortable and…soft.
“Hey Rarity?” Sunset murmured.
“Mm,” came the response. Rarity sounded much like how Sunset felt in that moment: utterly relaxed, and full of rosy fondness.
“I’m having a hard time keeping my eyes open.”
“Mmm…well, it is…” A pause. “…five twenty three.”
Sunset let out a chuckle. “Well so much for that hour.”
“Indeed,” Rarity chuckled back.
The silence came back, for a time. It was getting harder to think, and Sunset’s eyelids were growing heavier by the moment. “Gonna have to get up soon…”
“Have you slept yet?”
“Nnnnope.”
“Oh dear.” Rarity gave a sympathetic laugh. “My condolences.”
“Eeeeyup…today is gonna suck a little bit.”
“It might be worth coming in a bit late, just for the sake of getting at least a few hours in? Everyone is half dead with exhaustion for the first and second periods anyway.”
“I guess, but I want to see you.”
There was a delay for about half a second before Rarity responded, that rosy warmth coming back to her voice as she replied, “I want to see you too.”
The conversation ebbed once again, but Sunset didn’t mind. The silence had proven very comfortable…too comfortable, perhaps. At some point, the phone slipped from her hand, and her last efforts to cling to awareness were undone by the very thing that had proven so pleasant to her. Beside her, the phone remained lit, the symbol of Rarity’s contact lingering on that screen as the minutes continued to tick by on the time elapsed counter.
Neither girl hung up that morning. The call ended an hour later, when Sunset’s battery died.
Author's Note
I didn’t have a plan when I wrote this, I just kind of let it happen. Not disappointed!
Less-Late-Night Phone Call
The sound of the door opening could be heard clearly through what little space made up the inside of this shanty, sparsely-furnished living space, as was the sound of it closing.
Sunset Shimmer didn’t so much walk into her room as she did shamble into it. She stepped out of her shoes in the doorway, leaving them where they lay on the floor, then took a few more steps forward before she fell face first into the mattress, barely managing to roll her shoulders enough to let slip her leather jacket, which was blearily peeled from her back and haphazardly shoved off of herself. It didn’t even make it all the way off the bed; gravity had to finish what she started, signifying that it had completed its task about a minute later to the sound of a muffled plop on the floor.
Today sucked. Today massively sucked. It hadn’t even sucked for a particularly good reason, either. And the best part was: it wasn’t over yet. There was still an entire night ahead of her, one in which she still had to find it in her to both get through and also end up sleeping at the correct time, something which she had not done an especially good job with so far.
She didn’t want to be in this house right now. She really didn’t. It wasn’t a charming place - really, calling it a house was an honor it didn’t deserve, more like a shack with delusions of grandeur. It didn’t even smell nice. At least there were ways to fix that…
Sunset heaved a sigh into the sheets below her, reaching stiffly into one pocket, fumbling slightly with it at the awkward angle and having to push past the weight of her thigh pressing the pocket closed. She hated the feeling of this pocket. She hated the feeling of these pants. She hated clothes. She hated how humans forced you to wear these things. She hated not having fur, so that she had to feel everything rubbing on her skin. She hated feeling everything, all the time, all over her body. Too much, it was too much to do all the time. She wanted to find this lighter and light all these damn clothes on fire so she could be free.
She found something hard in her pocket, and this pleased her. Then it started vibrating. This pleased her less. It was a double whammy: not only was that not her lighter, but someone was calling her.
Growling in frustration, Sunset rolled into her back and rammed her hand the rest of the way into her pocket so she could actually retrieve this object, then yanked it back out to examine the screen. She read the screen for a second, and her expression lifted. Answering it was a bit easier than it had seemed a moment ago. “Hey Rarity.”
“Hello, darling,” came the fashionista’s chipper voice. “I hope I’m not interrupting anything terribly important right now.”
“No, not at all,” Sunset said through a sigh, letting her gaze find the ceiling again. “I just got home.”
“You sound exhausted.”
“Kind of am,” Sunset admitted. “I made it to bed, and, uh…didn’t really plan on going much further than that.”
“I see…” A tinge of concern entered Rarity’s voice. “Would you rather I call back, darling?”
“I mean, I haven’t even heard why you called in the first place. What’s up?”
“Oh, nothing,” Rarity replied, casually. “I just wanted to check up on you and see how you were feeling today, make sure you were adequately socialized, lest we end up with yet another situation like we were in two days ago.”
Sunset winced. She could tell Rarity hadn’t meant it as such, but the phrasing evoked a ping of guilt. “Yeah, I’m…yeah. Sorry about that, again.”
“Pah.” The hand wave was not seen, but heard. “Nonsense, don’t apologize for such a thing, Sunset. If anything, I should be thanking you for feeling like I was someone you could trust with that.”
“What, waking you up at 4 AM?” Sunset deadpanned. “Sure, I’ve got you covered if you ever want to lose sleep.”
“Oh you stop that, you know that’s not it. I meant more…” There was a squeak of a mattress on the other end of the line. “Oh, heavens, what’s the phrase I’m looking for, erm…” Sunset had no idea what she was getting at, so she wasn’t sure how to help here. “Like…feeling like I’m someone you could reach out to, for that sort of thing. You know? It felt like high praise.”
Sunset shrugged as though Rarity might see, raising the lighter she had fished from her pocket in this time with her free hand, turning it over idly as she talked. “It was kind of stupid of me to do that, to be honest. I expected you to be mad about it.”
“Whatever for?”
“The part where I woke you up at 4 AM.”
“…I suppose there’s some merit to that concern,” Rarity admitted. “I was a pinch frustrated, but I figured it was for a good reason. And it was. Or at least, I think so. Water under the bridge, darling, as I said. If you need to do that again…well, you know my number.”
Sunset didn’t say anything to that, though a smile made its way to her lips. She looked up at the lighter in her hand, suddenly remembering why she had fished it out, and heaved herself stiffly back up into the sitting position, then eventually pushed her legs back under her so she could make her way to her scented candle. Lavender sounded vastly preferable to dust and sweat.
“Are you lifting weights or something?” came the wry voice in her ear.
“Just my own dead weight.” Sunset clicked the lighter several times, each resulting in a shower of sparks until a tongue of flame was finally summoned. She would prefer magic for this, but, circumstances.
“That was an awful lot of sound effects for just that.”
“Like I sa- ow.” Sunset shook her hand sharply where the heat of the flame scorched her finger - reached in too deep. She rolled her eyes and reignited it, lifting the candle instead. Definitely preferred magic for this. “Like I said, I’m tired.”
“And pinching yourself, apparently.”
“Burning myself, actually.”
“Well don’t do that. There’s a fine line between well-done and overdone, darling, and I’m afraid you’re crossing it.”
“It’s just so hard to get that nice crispy brown, you know?” Sunset set the lit candle back down on the folding table, where it would eventually do it’s job, once the wax melted enough. “I get a little too enthusiastic.”
“Patience is a virtue, as they say. I’m sure ‘Don’t cook yourself’ is also said somewhere.”
“Don’t tell me how to live my life.”
Rarity laughed for a moment. “Let’s compromise with, if you’re going to cook yourself, at least season well. How’s that?”
“Sounds almost like you intend to eat me.”
“Well if you’re going to keep aspiring to be delicious, there’s only so much I can do, darling.”
Sunset flopped back onto her bed, smirking. “Just can’t help yourself, huh?”
“A lady always bears in mind what her vices are,” Rarity said, tone picking up a suggestive quality. “We’ve all got our guilty pleasures.”
“Like?”
“Ohh…you know,” came the teasing response. “This and that.”
“Would I happen to be this or that?”
“Possibly.” The half-lidded, conspiratorial smile was practically audible. “Possibly not…who’s to say?”
“I’m interested in finding out, myself. Always looking to learn new things... Any advice?”
“Like I said, darling: patience is a virtue.”
Sunset tsk’d coyly. “Well, that’s a problem for me. Everyone’s got their vices, you know? I’m pretty impatient.”
“A problem indeed…perhaps we’ll have to work something out together sometime, figure out a little something that will work for the both of us.”
“I’m looking forward to it.”
“As am I, darling…though only if you get that crispy brown texture down pat for me.”
Sunset chuckled. “I’ll aspire to be as delicious as I can be, just for you.”
The sound that came through the speaker was equal parts giggle and purr. “I await our meal with baited breath.”
A silence came over the two of them, for a time. Sunset only just then realized she was smiling - a big, wide smile, directed at nothing in particular, save perhaps these rosy vibes that once again danced in her chest. A feeling of deja-vu came over Sunset, and she glanced at the phone in her hand, noting how the number under Rarity’s name had grown dramatically. “…man.”
“Woman, actually. It was a coin flip chance, you tried.”
Sunset snorted involuntarily, rolling her eyes. “Look at the time elapsed.”
There was a pause. “Oh,” said Rarity, sounding a bit more distant for a moment. “Well that’s a conspicuously large number, isn’t it?”
“I feel like we just started talking. I swear when we talk, time goes into fast motion.”
“The flirting probably had a lot to do with it,” Rarity stated, like it was the most obvious thing. “I do enjoy a good flirting now and then.”
“Apparently,” Sunset absently replied, feeling a little strange now that it had been pointed out. She wasn’t quite sure when that started, and now that she was made aware that’s what they’d been doing all this time, she wasn’t quite sure how to feel about it. Not that she was new to flirting, it’s just she was typically aware of it when it happened. It was a conscious decision, usually to mess with someone. This was…not that.
Apparently Rarity was that easy to flirt with, not just talk to. Or they just bounced off one another really well? Sunset wasn’t sure. She decided she didn’t want to think about it right now. Today had sucked, and this was too nice a talk to sully with thoughts about such real topics.
The conversation had lapsed again, and Sunset took this opportunity to glance about herself. Speaking of today sucking: the discomfort of the day likewise took this opportunity to re-introduce itself to Sunset’s awareness. She was unbuckling her belt before she even thought to say anything. “Gimme one minute, I’m gonna get undressed.”
“We discussed this on Monday, darling,” came the drawling response, as lofty as it was wry. “We’re supposed to work up to that, or there’s no point.”
“Well, uh…” The tank top was plucked from her person, and unceremoniously tossed away. “Sorry? But I feel like I’m covered in sandpaper right now, and I am really, really over it.”
“Mm…”
Something else was said, though Sunset didn’t hear it clearly, too busy expressing grunts of sheer, unadulterated relief as article after article of chafing, suffocating fabric was all but flung across the room, replaced with the sweet sensation of open air. She let loose a heartfelt sigh when she had shed her cloth prison, then picked the phone back up off the pillow it had been placed on. “Sorry, what was that?”
“I said, do you have some sensory thing or another, darling?” Rarity repeated, with a hint of concern. “Or do we need to go clothing shopping even more direly than I thought?”
“Oh- no, no. Uh…I think.” Did she? No, probably not. “Wearing clothes constantly just really gets to me. I don’t know how you do it.”
The frown was felt as much as heard. “You need to work on that one, there’s far more elegant ways to try and get me to strip.”
”No ,” Sunset groaned. “Harmony’s sake. Does it seriously not bother you? To like, always be covered up like that?”
There was several seconds of silence following this. “Ah,” Rarity said suddenly, as though something had clicked. “Pony.”
“Yes. Pony. We don’t like, do that in Equestria. I guess some people do, but like…eugh.” Sunset itched her neck, where she could still faintly feel the ghost of a shirt’s collar nagging at her. “Seriously, it messes with me really bad some days. How do you manage it?”
“How do…” The uncertainty in Rarity’s voice was palpable. “Well…erm…I mean, it’s…it’s not really a problem for me, I suppose?”
Sunset frowned at this reaction. “Weird question?”
“…a pinch,” Rarity admitted. “It’s not really something I’ve ever thought about, if I can be truthful. It’s just…” A brief pause. “It just is? I don’t like wearing socks to bed, but, I’m not…really…certain, about the rest? It’s clothing. I guess there’s powders or something you could use, if it’s causing you so much discomfort…”
“Like what?”
“Baby powder, perhaps? If you don’t mind being gently dusted with flour.” A beat, followed by a chuckle. “Though, you do seem to be aspiring to be delicious…”
“Just call me shake-and-bake.”
There was an extremely loud burst of static as Rarity sputtered directly into the speaker of her phone.
Sunset grinned. “What, too good?”
“You’re awful,” Rarity managed through quiet laughter. “Oh you’re awful, Sunset.”
The wide grin did not indicate that she felt especially awful about it. “Bad girl at heart, what can I say? Assigned shake-and-bake at birth.”
Rarity couldn’t even berate her, unable to push it through the laughter her end of the line was momentarily consumed by. Sunset soon found herself chuckling along as well, listening happily to the joyous sounds flowing through the speaker.
Rarity really did have a nice voice. Her laughter was especially fun. Everything she said sounded almost melodic in the way she strung her sentences together, and her laugh was much like that as well, though much of the structure was lost, replaced with joyous chords that bounced about, like a bouncy ball that had been dropped and was being gleefully chased after.
Sunset didn’t recall rolling onto her belly, nor resting her chin on her hand as she listened along. Rarity’s pleasant sigh into her ear brought her back into focus. A moment later, a decidedly less pleasant muttering was faintly heard: “Oh damn it.”
Sunset’s dreamy smile faded a little. “What?”
“Oh, nothing…I just looked at the time.”
Sunset glanced at the phone’s screen for a second. 9:42. “Time folded up on itself again.”
“Indeed…” A wistful sigh. “We do need to consider going to bed at a reasonable hour this time, darling.”
“We’ve got plenty of time still.” Sunset did feel some fatigue, but was not feeling any inclination to submit to it. Not yet.
“I still need to take a shower.”
“Ah.”
A few seconds passed. From Rarity’s end came a consternated growl, then a scoff. “Oh to hell with it.” Faintly there was the noise of drawers being opened, then closed, one after the other. “Hope you don’t mind being put on speaker for a while, darling.”
Sunset arched an eyebrow at this. “Why?”
“Because you’re coming to the shower with me.”
Sunset bit back a snort. “Uhh, Rarity? I don’t think phones work super well in the water.”
“Well it’s not going in the shower,” Rarity huffed. “Just by it.”
“You sure? I don’t want to be the reason you bricked your phone.”
“Oh please, I think I can manage.”
Sunset shrugged, as though Rarity might see it. She really needed to quit doing that. “If you say so.”
“And I do.” The audio quality shifted, suddenly sounding a bit more echoey than it did previously. The sounds were all a bit more flat, less focused on Rarity - the sound of a door opening was heard with much more clarity than it otherwise would, as did the footsteps that Rarity took as she went down what sounded like a long, empty hallway in a massive warehouse. “It’s not my first rodeo with this, I’ll have you know.”
“Oh I’m sure.” Sunset rolled back onto her side, taking the opportunity to swap hands to hold the phone against her other ear; sitting on her stomach with her arm up was causing the limb to start to tingle from poor circulation. “I always figured you were the sort to like, walk around the house and talk.”
“And you’d be right! Well, more right in the past.” There was another sound of a door opening, and then closing, followed by a faint sound of fabric being dropped. “It’s a bit more troublesome when you have a nosy little sister living with you, always shadowing your steps and trying to figure out who you’re talking to and what you’re discussing.” The muttered, “Thank you, mom and dad,” was barely audible with the sound quality the way it was.
Sunset wasn’t sure what to say to that, so she didn’t say anything. She rolled onto her back, and listened to the faint sounds of movement on the other end. For the better part of a minute or two, there was no further dialogue.
“If the water is unbearable, just let me know, would you, darling?”
“Sure thing.” Sunset wasn’t sure what to expect, though when the droning noise filtered through the speaker into her ear, she figured that was it. “Eh.”
“Tolerable?”
“Eh,” she repeated. “Might be kind of hard, I don’t know.”
“We did get a new…hm.” A few beats of silence, then the sound of water got a lot closer. There was a rattling sound, and something bumping against the microphone, and while the water was a lot louder now than it was before, so too did Rarity sound clear, if significantly more echoey. “How’s that sound?”
“Sounds like you did that thing I said was a terrible idea and put the phone in the shower.”
“I can neither confirm nor deny at this time.” A curtain rustled.
Sunset rolled her eyes. “Just don’t drop it.”
“Oh, hush, it’ll be fine. ” There was the sound of splattering, and the sound of the water would occasionally shift as the thing it was striking against moved about some.
Another lapse in conversation happened. Sunset didn’t really mind it, though admittedly the sound of the water through the less-than-stellar quality audio filling her ear was not quite as engaging as Rarity had been up till this point. Taking this as a chance to multitask, Sunset got up off of her bed with a grunt to get something to eat. She realized she’d missed dinner and should probably not go to bed without eating again.
“You know,” said an echoey Rarity down her rain tunnel, “it’s really easy to forget you aren’t human.”
“Oh yeah?” A cupboard was opened…there was only one box to choose from, so pick it she did. The sight of it wasn’t exactly thrilling, and a bowl was fished for out of another nearby cupboard.
“I find it a little strange to think about, if I may be quite honest.” Something clattered on the other end; Rarity didn’t acknowledge it. “I’ve known about you and you’ve been living among us here for several years now, and only recently has it come to light that you’re not even from earth, and it’s expressly because we were told as much. I mean, even with some of your…erm…”
“Weird-ass questions?” Sunset dryly offered, pouring a bowl of cornflakes for herself. No milk because no refrigerator, so she popped a handful of them into her mouth like chips.
“To be fair darling, you don’t ask many of those. And your-“ A pause, presumably washing-related. “-and your little quirks could be excused as just that. I would never in a hundred years have guessed that you were a pony in a human body, even after having gotten to know you better.”
“Probably a good thing,” Sunset said past a mouthful of dry cornflakes. She swallowed a bit too hard, and grimaced at the pain. “Walking around wondering whether or not any of the people you meet on the street is secretly a technicolor horse wearing a human body seems a little unhealthy. That’s pretty firmly in tinfoil hat territory.”
There was a faint, echoey snort. “I suppose you’re right about that. Even still, it’s strange to consider. I would have thought someone from another world would feel very stilted, and…unnatural. I never really got that sense from you or Twilight.”
“Twilight was a lot more obvious.”
Silence.
“Rarity, she ran on all fours through the hallways,” Sunset said flatly. “She was trying to type on a computer like a gorilla. I know I made the drool in those videos pretty clear, I specifically edited it to be.”
Rarity gave a loud, resigned sigh. “I’m just trying to be charitable to the poor dear. Lord knows how stressful it must have been to be dealing with all that at once.”
“It is stressful.” Sunset paused for a more reasonably-sized handful of cornflakes, taking a second to admire the alien appendage while the topic was on her mind. “It’s…cool. It’s really cool. But it’s a lot. Especially when you’re trying to figure out stuff like…you know, like, survival, and figuring out how the world around you works, never mind your anatomy.”
“For what it’s worth, I think you’ve adapted fantastically, darling.”
Sunset curled her fingers into a light fist, and a smile made its way across her face. “Thanks.” The praise did indeed mean something to her, but she was also keenly aware of how she looked right now. Eating plain cereal like potato chips while stark naked in a horrible little house she didn’t even own with no electricity or running water was not exactly the spitting image of ‘fitting in.’ “I think I’ve got a lot of work to do still on this whole ‘human’ thing, though. There’s a lot to it, and I don’t think I’m ever going to be…you know…spot on.”
“Perfection is a noble goal, so long as you never truly expect to achieve it. Besides, I’m quite fond of you the way you are.”
“Yeah?”
“Of course, darling.” Sunset could feel the smile she aimed at the phone, in that moment. “It’s not every day I find someone I can enjoy talking with so much that I never want to stop. You’re wonderful company, oddities all included. If anything I’d say it adds to the charm.”
“Well…geez.” Sunset couldn’t repress the smile, rubbing the back of her neck bashfully. “You’re making me blush over here.”
“Oh my my, what is this? Bad girl Sunset Shimmer can’t take a little compliment?”
Sunset snorted, shaking her head, as though it would be visible through the phone. “Yeah, you’re right, I’m bucked. I’m going to get my bad girl card revoked at this rate.”
“Quite a predicament indeed…I’ll tell you what, I’ll make a deal with you.” The sound of water suddenly stopped, and Rarity’s voice came through much clearer. “I’ll refrain from reporting this little incident to the proper authorities, and you will never refer to yourself as ‘shake-and-bake’ again. Deal?”
Sunset let let out a long, windy sigh, which slowly transformed into a stream of throaty chuckles. “Well I guess they don’t call me shake-and-bake. End of an era…”
“I’m quite confident you will find a way to endure in these trying times.” Rarity almost managed to sound like she was trying to not laugh herself. Almost. “Shake-and-bake…honestly.”
“It’s not a phase, mom, this is how I really am.”
This tipped Rarity over the edge into giggling laughter, which in turn set Sunset off as well. Once again, the two laughed together, words set aside to enjoy a moment of mirth.
As Sunset let out a sigh at the end of her chuckling, she glanced at her phone, and made a painful discovery. “Oh buck. My phone’s at two percent.”
“Sunseeet!” Rarity whined. The echoing effect of the shower made it seem significantly louder than it was. “Did I not just get done saying that I didn’t want to stop talking to you?”
“I know, I know, I’m sorry.” Sunset dragged a hand down her face as she let out an irritated breath. “I charged it yesterday, but I didn’t expect to be having another call like this again, so I didn’t charge it at school.”
“Oh this is worst thing. Worst! Possible! Thing! I’m ruined, Sunset!”
“Well look, we can do this again, right? We’ll just…reschedule for tomorrow, I guess.”
“Oho, we’re doing appointments now,” Rarity said with a curl of intrigue, her life sounding suddenly a lot less ruined than it did a moment ago. There was a sound of bumping and jostling on Rarity’s end, then the audio quality suddenly spiked as the phone was taken off speaker. “I suppose I can make do with that…same time tomorrow?”
“Same-ish time, yeah.” Sunset flicked another glance at her phone. “One percent…gotta call it here.”
“Sunset?” Rarity’s voice was suddenly quite soft, and sincere.
“Yeah?”
“I really enjoy talking to you.”
Sunset opened her mouth, and found no words came out of it immediately. She emitted a combination of a breath and a single chuckle, smiling down at her bed as she tried to process the feeling that this simple statement had caused to leap through her chest like lightning. “I…I do too. I’m…yeah. Yeah.”
The silence that closed in over them was rosy, and embracing. Though nothing was said for a time after this, Sunset really, really did not want to hang up…so, she didn’t. Sunset remained on the line, listening to the barely audible hiss of the phone in her ear letting her know that they were still connected, content with the knowledge that Rarity was there, smiling that same smile, just as happy to be there in that moment as she was. Their shared quiet felt like a hug.
One minute and twelve seconds later, the phone died, and only then did the call end.
