Hell Hath No Fury on A Father Misplaced

by Cafffinator

Chapter 1

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Sometime in the past...

"Ugh, did someone get the license plate of that lawn? ..." Wait, lawn? I reach over to my nightstand and grab the grass that-Grass?!?!!?!

I'm on high alert in an instant and get to my feet. I scan the area around me for any danger. I keep a calm mind, as panicking never does anyone any good. I'm in a clearing of an unknown forest, what seems to be far away from the city (no noise or light pollution), and in the dead of night.

Concluding that I am in no immediate danger, I begin to examine myself. Wallet, weapons, and valuables are still on my person. I wasn't mugged... There are no puncture wounds on any of my arteries and I am cognitively stable. I wasn't drugged... The back of my head is swollen and my neck is scratched/stained from grass. I was knocked unconscious.

Come on, think, think, think! What happened? Why am I in a forest? Why was I unconscious? Why... is my left shoe gone? I had only now realized that I was slightly leaning to the left and decided to look down. "Out of everything I have..." Below my beige kakis, on my right foot, sits a brown leather shoe. The same can't be said for the left, as it is only adorned with a simple black sock. I spare a glance around the ground of the clearing for a few seconds, before deciding that there are more important things to do.

I take my phone out of my pocket and check its location history. It still thinks I'm in front of my house? Things only get weirder from there. It's only been a few minutes since I got back from work as well? I don't live anywhere close to woods this dense. The phone is still at 100%, but I have no reception. I attempt to call 911 anyways. It didn't ring, but if any of it did go through, then they would have a ping to the location of the call.

I take a calming breath and look to the night sky as both my jaw and phone drop. "Whoah" Complete and udder beauty is the only way I can describe the sight before me. Each and every star seems to shine with animation against a clear dark blue canvas. Rather than simple dots, these stars seem to take on a glow that resembles 5 points. It's practically choreographed, the way they take turns to shine in a wave pattern. However they all pale in comparison to the true star (no pun intended) of the show. The moon. It's majestic. It's huge. It's bright. It's-wrong.

I took enough astrology to know that the night sky can't possibly look the way it looks now. It wasn't even supposed to be full tonight! "What the hell is going on here?" Retrace your steps from last night.

"I grabbed my work bag. I got out of my car. I walked across my front lawn. Then there was that idiot with purple LED headlights that came out of nowhere behind me... somehow. Which caused my left leg to give out... I think. I tried to balance by leaning backwards. Then... nothing." Even I don't believe that story and I'm the one who experienced it.

Well if I'm going to be in a forest, then I'm doing it with 2 shoes on. I open my duffel bag and take out my running shoes. The full contents of the bag include; running shoes, workout clothes, deodorant, some over the counter pain reliever/anti-inflammatory, my laptop and its charger, some work documents, my phone charger, ink pens, my metal water bottle, and my lunch (we had a surprise meeting where lunch was provided). In my pockets I carry my phone, wallet, keys, and straight blade knife. Finally, on my waist I carry a 9mm Pit Viper handgun.

Ok, I have 2 options in this scenario. Option 1: make a camp, slowly explore the area, and find high enough ground to build a signal fire. Option 2: follow signs of civilization. "Hmm".

"What the fuck was that!?" Does it matter?!?!?! Option 2 and fast!!! I take off in a dead sprint heading for where the forest slopes downwards. Low elevation leads to water. Water leads to a stream. A stream leads to a river. A river leads to civilization. Civilization leads to me not dying!!!

1 hour later...

"Finally" The generic forest ambiance has been replaced by the sound of flowing water. I come out of the tree line to a sizeable river flowing down a small slope. Now, do I travel up or down stream?

"Somepony help!!!"

That came from upstream!!! "Hold on! I'm on my way!" As I run along the river side, I have a strange thought. These occurrences almost seem too convie-

"Oh thank Celestia. We're under the tree! Please hurry!!!" The sound of snarling and a tree being bashed with something heavy has become more prevalent, as I near the source of the voice. The voice in question sounds female, no older than a teenager.

That sounds like a lion. Unfortunately for me, I was only partially correct in that guess.

I cress the top of the hill to a truly terrifying sight. "That's a big cat" Understatement of the century. The beast before me is at least 7 feat tall. It appears to be a lion with a deep red mane, well pronounced muzzle, and very tall ears. The mega lion was hunched over, desperately trying to claw and bite its way through exposed tree roots on the bank of the river. At least it was, until my presence became known. Those tall ears are apparently not just for show as they have swiveled in my direction. It looks up from attacking (what I assume is) the child's barrier and the aggression begins to make sense.

Give a killing machine rabies, because what else can life throw at me today!? A thick, frothy foam pours out of its massive maw. Every muscle that line's its body, spasms uncontrollably beneath its skin. Its movements are akin to that of someone who'd be inebriated; uncoordinated and aggravated. It decides that I am an easier target and begins to close the 40 yard gap between himself and I. It moves in an absolutely feral way. It doesn't want to hunt for food. It wants to hunt just to kill.

I waste no time; aiming my pistol, flicking off the safety, and- *BANG* -firing. The Winchester 124-grain PDX-1 round hits home, right between the beast's eyes. That ammunition's soul purpose is for penetration, so if that doesn't work, nothing will. The lion makes it 30 yards before it's movements slow. It adopts a look of confusion, before stumbling and falling over. Dead. [20 shots left]

Little too close for comfort, but I'll take it. Now, lets see if those kids are ok. I jog up to the dugout in hopes of finding people who can get me out of this forest. "I-Is the manticore gone!?" This is a new voice, roughly the same age but male.

Manticore? The kid must have been so scared, he imagined the lion differently. However, as I look at it from behind, it appears that I'm the one imagining things. "I just HAD to ask "what else?" didn't I?" I mutter. What I had mistakenly assumed to be a normal lion's tail, was instead a gigantic red scorpion tail. The final segment of the tail (that's connected to the foot long stinger) is at least as big as my head. What I thought was just loose skin around its barrel, turned out to be a set of massive bat wings. They twitch and extend slightly as the body sends out its last signals. If I were to guess the span of them, I'd wager close to 20ft. I killed an ACTUAL manticore. [Brain.exe has failed to load and isn't responding. Running diagnostics...]

"Uh, yeah it's safe now" Existential crisis later. Get the fuck out of Dodge NOW!!! My concept of reality is on thin ice right now, so the sooner I can get these people out of the woods, the sooner I can get some answers. I crouch down and look between the tree roots (which don't look like they could have taken much more). "Is everyone al-" The thin ice that my reality was on? It melted, boiled, evaporated, rained back down, and froze my reality at the bottom of the lake it sat upon.

[Brain.exe has suffered a fatal error. Running program: Assess_Aid_and_Evac] There were six creatures in total, before me. Each of them having very sentient expressions, with disproportionately large eyes.

The first creature I noticed, appeared to be the mythological beast known as a griffon (the "theoretical" cross-breed between an eagle and a lion). It drew my eye due to its insistence on having as much space as possible. It was hyperventilating in the small confines of the tree roots and pushing its compatriots away. Sounds like the voice I just heard. So I guess he is male and claustrophobic. Standing on all fours, I would approximate that he would be 4' 1. His fur and feathers are a light sky blue, with his wings and large tail plume being a slightly darker shade. However, his under belly leading to his beak is a tanned-white color. The only other color on his body was yellow, which occupied his beak, claws, eyebrows, and tips of his head feathers. His eyes were an ocean blue.

The next creature was (conveniently enough) trying in vain to calm the griffon down. At first I thought it was some sort of lizard, until I noticed-Wings? Hmmm... wait... no... don't tell me that's a- Dragon. It fit the bill. Seeing as how it was crouched down like a normal biped would, I would wager their height to be 3' 8. The scales and outer wing skin was a faded orange. A light sweet corn yellow made up the underbelly (which ran from the snout down to the end of the tail), the pair of horns (which came out the sides of the head to curve upwards above the head spines), and the inner wing skin. The only spines they had, occupied the head and tip of the tail. Both of which were Fuchsia pink. The head spines interlocked in a way that it resembled hair and the tail spine looked akin to a leaf (with the actual tail making up the "stem" of the leaf). It seems (just like actual reptile's) it doesn't have eyebrows however, in their stead, it uses the scales above the eyes to express facial expressions (not unlike eyebrows). They only have two notable fangs that come out of the upper set of teeth and even those are tiny. The (reptilian) eyes were a java blue.

On the other side of the cavern, was (yet) another mythological specimen. A hippogriff (the "theoretical" cross-breed between an eagle and a horse). It had a bruise on its left hind leg and its left wing was splayed out, twitching. It whimpered as it attempted to stifle its crying. Sounds like the first voice. So she is female with a left hind leg and wing injury. Definitely the tallest of the bunch, she probably has a height of around 4' 4. Her fur and wings were a cherub pink. Her mane and tail had a two-toned "zebra" pattern, of seagull and link water blue. Lavender magenta made up her beak, claws, and hind hooves. She wore a necklace with stones of similar colors. Her eyes were a gradient purple.

Next to her was... was... ok, I give up. The shape of the being next to the hippogriff made me think of an equine, but every other aspect of it screamed insect. So... bug-horse? Let's go with that. The "bug-horse" looked absolutely exhausted, however it was still trying to comfort its injured comrade. In stark contrast to the last being, it held a likely height of 3' 6. Its exoskeleton was a powder blue, but strongly resembled an equine's hide. It had chitin that resembled the hair of a horse's mane and tail. This was a transparent sea pink. Additionally, it had an elytra (not unlike a lady bug's) that was Mandy with Mauvelous pink spots. In the center of the forehead sat a horn that had two tips, with one reaching farther than the other. The creature's ocellus (insect eyes) were Keppel blue.

Taking up the majority of the space in the safe haven, sat (somehow) the most normal looking creature. A yak with two pink bows parting its long hair from the face. It also wore a Chinook green shoulder blanket over its hump. Hmm, that's the only one to wear clothes and they seem feminine. So we'll go with female. From her hump, she would measure up to 4'3. Her long, shaggy, leather brown wool covered everything but her straw hide ankles and face. The hooves and horns were the same two tones of Sirocco blue and Nandor green. Her muzzle was a parchment tan, while her eyes were an olivine green.

Now I originally thought that there was only 5 creatures under this tree. That was, until I noticed the form struggling to breath in the yak's vice grip bear hug. As he came up for air, and there is no question that he is a HE from the way he is being held I took in his appearance. He was a pony but- why does he have three sea turtles printed on his ass? A brand maybe? If he wasn't smothered by yak fluff, he would probably be the middle ground of the group in terms of height at 4 ft. even. His coat was Australian Mint (not far from a mossy beach). The mane and (cropped) tail were two toned with turquoise and mountain meadow green. Huh, it looks like seaweed. His eyes were silver tree green.

"-right?..." With my introduction, brings the end to their motions. At first an overwhelming sense of relief and joy is shared among the prisoners of the tree. However, as they realize what saved them they adopt looks of hesitation and sink further into the roots. They're absolutely traumatized. "Hey" I put my hands up in a disarming manner. "It's going to be ok. Your safe now." No child, regardless of species, should have to go through what these kids went through.

The bug-horse fixes me with a scrutinizing gaze, almost like it's searching for something. After a solid ten seconds, it adopts a look of bewilderment. "Guys" Ok, bug horse is female. Noted. I don't leave her gaze as she speaks. "I think we can trust i-um him" Every head snaps to her with varying degrees of confusion. Did she almost call ME "it"?

Suddenly overcoming his claustrophobia, the griffon scrambles over to her and gets right in her ear. "Are you crazy!?" He steals an occasional glance my way. "All we know about this thing is that it somehow took care of a manticore, it came from the Everfree, and is taller than Celestia!!! Have you ever even heard any magic sound like THAT before?!" Ok so, the name of that forest is called the Everfree... never heard of it. Also, do they really not see many things taller than 6' 2?

Distant thunder started to boom in the distance. We don't have time for this. "Your friend seems hurt" I say glancing to the hippogriff. I crawl my way over to her at calming pace. "May I?" I gesture to her bruises. She has a look of confliction stretched across her beak. How that exactly works, I still don't know. She looks to the bug-horse, who gives her a smile and a nod, before looking back to me. With squeezed eyes, she nods.

"Can you tell me your name?" I need to keep her distracted while I do this. I begin to test the range of motions in her injured limbs.

"*sniff* Silverstream" She doesn't wince with every motion, but it still is enough to be worrisome. Both her (wing and ankle) joints are inflamed, but not enough to consider that a break occurred. She needs to keep that hoof elevated to help the swelling go down and that wing won't be flying for a while.

I open up my bag and take out the bottles of pain reliever, anti-inflammatory, and water. I put, in my hand, one and two of the pills respectfully. "Ok Silverstream, I'm going to need you to take these so you start feeling better" I hold the medication out to her, but she still shies away. She still doesn't trust me. "We'll do it together". I take out the same portion for myself and show myself consuming the drugs. I need WAY more than this right now. Seeing as how it was safe for me to ingest, she takes the pills and swallows them. She begins to gag and I let her drink from my bottle.

"That was awful" she sticks her tongue out in perhaps the most adorable way possible.

"Heh, yeah it don't taste good, but it'll get the job done" Just like that, the tension begins to leave the room. Now the important question. "So do any of you know a way out of this place?" They all share a slow nod. "Ok. Good." I turn back to Silverstream and get really close to her. "Now what I need you to do is put your arms around me" she glances around the room as her arms slowly creep towards me. "It's ok, I won't bite" I say with a small chuckle. For the first time, she gives a small smile (albeit an uneasy one) and loops her arms around my neck. "Got a good grip?" she nods "Alright, 1, 2, 3, up!" I pick her up bridal style, while staying crouched. She momentarily freaks out, before deciding to just relax in the position. "Feel better?" Must feel nice to have that pressure off her hoof. She doesn't meet my gaze, but still nods. Looking up from her, I spot five jaws on the ground.

"Whoa" Ok, dragon is also female. side stepping back through the roots, my bag bumps into one of them, causing it to collapse the rest of the way. This gives the children pause, as they begin to connect some unwanted dots in their heads. They share a look and continue on their way. The rain has started to come down now "Do any of you know someplace to wait this out?"

"The treehouse, but it's a bit of a walk" says the pony. Huh, even his voice sounds like a stereotypical "surfer dude".

"Well, let's get a move on then" Before they notice the corpse. If they haven't heard a gunshot before, then I'm not explaining it right now. They move at a jog in order to keep up with my stride, so I elect to let them lead on.

"We almost died" I look down to see that Silverstream has a thousand yard stare. I know that look. "If you didn't show up then-

"Look at me" I move my head right in front of her's and fix her with a serious expression "You're alive and well. That's all that matters. Ok?" Tears begin to flow freely off her feathered face and she hugs me tightly.

"T-thank you" Even through the rain, I feel her tears on my shoulder.

"Shhhhh sh sh, it's ok it's ok" I stroke the back of her mane. Thankfully, everyone else seemed to be too lost in their own conversations to notice. Hopefully this "treehouse" is close by.

30 min later...

I'm tired. I don't even look up from the ground, as wet and cold turns to dry and warm. I instead tunnel vision on the holy grail of couches. Must be that big to accommodate all of th- you know what? I'm too tired to even analyze. I set both my bag and Silver down on one end of the couch. I hear the inhale of five different lungs and raise my finger. "Before..." I turn around to (once again) five open mouths. "...I answer an any questions, trust me I have some as well, can I get an ice pack and something to wrap it with?" They simultaneously shut there mouths. The dragon is the one to scamper off and grab the items I requested. "Thank you" I set to work wrapping her ankle while the bug-horse speaks.

"May we know your name?" I hear in her voice that she is getting really exited, so I better make this blunt.

"David, David Sanderman" I look back over to the group. "Actually, I don't think I got the rest of your names" That could make things easier... I hope.

They all perk up with the same realization that I just had. "Oh! Of course. I'm Ocellus" She's named after what her eyes are called?

The next to speak is the dragon, "Smolder" Named after a verb?

The griffon, "Gallus" He's named after a genus of large birds? Would that mean that griffons are under that genus, instead of under the feline class? Of course, in Scottish origins it could also just mean something like "bold" or "daring"... that's probably it.

The pony, "Sandbar" ...Call it a hunch, but I think he likes the beach.

Then finally the yak, "Yona is Yona" Huh, nice name.

"Well Ocellus, Smolder, Gallus, Sandbar, Yona,..." I glance behind myself "...and Silverstream, thank you for letting me stay here to ride out the storm. However, if it's the same to you, can we table the questions for the morning?" I give a yawn to drive the point home. This causes all of them to do the same.

Smolder stretches her arms over her head and speaks, "I'm with the big guy on this one. Night everycreature." They share similar formalities, before heading upstairs. I grab my workout clothes from my bag and go around a corner.

As I start to remove my soaked clothing thank you waterproof phone case, I hear a conversation. "Silver? You need help coming upstairs?' I hear Ocellus ask.

"Oh! Um... I think I'll just stay down here. Don't want my hoof to get worse y'know? he he"

"Makes sense, I'll bring you both some bedding" I finish changing and find a bathroom with a shower. I hang the clothes over the shower curtain, so they can properly dry. Coming back in to the other room I see two bead-spreads have been placed on opposite sides of the couch.

"I could have taken you upstairs" I explain, while setting up the bedding. Out of the corner of my eye, I notice that she has become very interested in my new apparel.

"Oh! Well I... uh... wanted to stay close by in case you needed something!" She must have been out there for too long, cause it looks like she's starting to heat up.

"Well, that is very thoughtful of you" I put the rest of my items in my bag and crawl onto my side of the couch. "Goodnight Silverstream"

"Goodnight David" I practically go straight to sleep as soon as the blanket is over myself... almost anyway.

"Um... David? Are you still awake?" My bliss has been interrupted by a voice and a talon tapping my arm.

"Hmm? What is it Lu-" I squint my eyes, "Silver?" I just want sleep right now. Is that to much to ask for?

"C-can I... is it alright if..." She won't look at me and has her index talons are pointing at each other. So that's what this is about. I don't say a word and simply raise my blanket to allow her access. She practically dives under the covers and curls up in front of my torso. Is she purring? That's not something equines OR avians do... didn't I say I was too tired to analyze? I simply shrug it off. Eh, definitely not the weirdest- [Program: Assess_Aid_and_Evac has been completed. Booting Brain.exe... 98%... 99%... 100%] Through blurry eyes I look down, I look up, I look all around. I'm spooning with a hippogriff, in her massive crystalized treehouse, after saving her (and her fellow fairy tale creatures) from a manticore...

"Oh, what in the actual flying fu- [Sleep mode: ON]


Author's Note

I feel like it's obvious, but the whole [Brain.exe] segments are just comedic ways to show how David is handling the situation.

Love the support so far, I have so many ideas for this story and I can't wait to see where it leads.

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