“Mares and Stallions, we are gathered here today to celebrate… no, that might alienate our younger guests. Ponies and other species… hmm, I think virtually all the audience tonight will be equine, so that’s a pass. Pegasi, Unicorns and Earth Ponies… I can’t say that, it’s far too long a sentence! Everypony will leave even before I finish speaking…. I’ve already got a reputation as the biggest windbag in town… I don’t want to further add to it… It’s a good job all the insomniacs in Ponyville vote for me, or I’d have been out on my middle-aged flank long ago… Though I have run unopposed every year up until now, so maybe I’m worrying over nothing. What do you ponies think?”

The brutally honest answer to Mayor Mare’s pensive enquiry during the Summer Sun rehearsal to her assembled flunkies and hangers-on there would’ve been ‘you’re absolutely right, in fact you’ve just ably demonstrated that very tendency in your indescribably tedious statement just now, it’s a good job your role is mostly just ceremonial in nature otherwise we’d all be in deep, deep doo-doo.’

Alas, expecting a truthful answer from this shameless bunch of yes-mares and sycophantic-stallions who’s reasonably well-paying jobs would be in jeopardy if they offered up one note of minor criticism was somewhat optimistic, so naturally they all showered the worried politician with undeserved praise and false flattery until her incredibly rare moment of self-reflection was quickly washed away like her grey dye was at least once a month.

“N-No no Mayor Mare, you’re the best!”

“A true leader of middle-class ponies everywhere! Great speech!”

“Why else would Princess Celestia herself pick you to open the Summer Sun Festival?”

“Hmm, perhaps it was because Sapphire Shores wasn’t availab… mmmm!”

The singular dissenting voice in this perpetual parade of pathetic hooflicking and kowtowing was, not surprising, an wet-behind-the-ears intern just starting his first day. Not to worry though; he was soon gagged and dragged away before any serious harm was done to the mayor’s fragile ego, and a month or so later on the job he’d almost certainly have any trace of idealism squeezed like orange juice from his burgeoning will.

“...Yes, I suppose you’re right. It’s just the pressure of the big occasion getting to me, that’s all. Oh, and that nasty business earlier with… what was that confounded unicorn’s name again, Feather Stroke?”

“...E-Er, I don’t believe we have that information yet, Miss Mare.” A slightly nervous light-green pegasus stepped forward, holding a well-used clipboard aloft in one trembling hoof and a quill sporadically dripping ink onto the floor in the other. “We did get our best mailmare to deliver copies of that poster to all residential addresses though, and we’re expecting a breakthrough in tracing her identity any minute now.”

“Good, good. Nopony calls me an ‘old fogie’, disrupts the running of my quiet town and aids in the destruction of my prize dandelion and gets away with it! Hopefully, if somepony knows who she is, they’ll do their civic duty and turn her in. And if not, those delicious vanilla cookies I cooked will seal the deal! I knew that unicorn was a troublemaker the second I laid eyes on her. Did you hear what she got up to all the way over in Canterlot, as well? What a disgrace…”

“Y-Yes, I believe all the charges were starkly laid out in bold capital letters on the bulletin that got distributed townwide. I know this, because you asked me to take care of the task myself.” Feather Stroke adjusted her glasses to address the mayor seriously. “A-And my brother Brush Stroke’s artist impression we put on there of her was surely a good one, if it matched your description of her…”

“What’s that, Ms Stroke? Are you saying… my memory might be failing?”

“N-No, n-no, not at all. I just thought it was a bit unusual, you know; a unicorn having one big star surrounded by five smaller ones as a Cutie Mark. I’ve never heard of such a phenomenon; it almost sounds like she has a destiny, or something…”

“Well, I suppose you have a point there. It isn’t every day you see such a unique symbol like that, but I know what I saw as I was staring at the villain’s hindquarters for at least five minutes as she made good her escape into the distance. I swear, a few years ago I would’ve chased and apprehended the heartless fiend within seconds, but these decrepit bones are only fit for menial office work these days I’m afraid.”

Mayor Mare relaxed slightly upon hearing Feather Stroke’s hurried explanation for her verbal faux pas, and so did the rest of the politician’s obsequious party of toadies who glared at Miss Stroke as another round of impulsive firings and sudden layoffs were narrowly averted.

“Sorry, everypony…” The much put-upon secretary apologised by way of whispering to her still-simmering colleagues. The drinks are on me tonight, I guess. And it’s the Summer Sun Festival, where everything is marked-up by at least 50%. Hurray(!)…

Fortunately, before any further potential disasters could unfold, Feather Stroke and company received the perfect distraction in the shape of a puffing and panting dusky Earth mare who galloped into the town hall drenched in sweat and barely able to string two words together through sheer exhaustion.

“S-She’s gulp here phew Twilight cough see Celestia now… wheeze.”

“Well of course Celestia’s not going to be here until ‘twilight’, Applejack; did you really think the Princess was going to show up just for the preliminaries?” Mayor Mare humoured the farmer’s apparent miscommunication, as offending her could damage the vital rural voting block irrevocably. “Come back in a few hours if you want to see her. Anyway, did you bring all the ‘apple-tastic treats’ you said you were going to? You know what a sweet tooth Celestia has.”

“That’s… heave not important right now.” An audible gasp could be heard from all in attendance at Applejack’s profound statement just then, as she’d never ever described her precious fruit as anything less than comparable to breathing or sleeping. One of the decorators in the background even fell off her ladder, such was the universal bewilderment in the room; and nopony went over to help her up. Shocking.

“Okay, now you’ve got my attention.” Mayor Mare wandered over to Applejack, who had just chugged down four glasses of water in a row and now felt suitably refreshed enough to make more sense. “What could be such an emergency for you to leave your duties on the farm, charge through here like a mad minotaur, disrupt preparations for the biggest date in the Summer calendar…”

“If things are headin’ in the way I expect them to go after what I just saw, there might not even be another festival to look forward to, Sugarcube. What I was tryin' to tell you is… I’ve met the pony on your wanted poster now. Twice. Her name is Twilight Sparkle, and she’s even more dangerous than you think…”

“Hold on, Applejack. Did you get all that, Feather Quill? ‘Twilight Sparkle’. That’s T W I L I G H T S P A R K L E, I think. Now, go out there and have a fresh batch of posters printed out, this time with the perpetrator’s name written in big lavender letters at the top like her fur, and afterwards wake up that dozy mailmare to deliver them across Ponyville before night falls. And if she complains, tell her we’ll pay her double… no, triple if she completes the assigned task on time. This is a mission of the highest priority, so take care of it now if you would; well, what are you waiting for?!”

“On it.” These simple words were Feather Stroke’s last contribution to the conversation, as she wasted not a moment longer before soaring off to the printers before it shut. If she was at all disgruntled at having simple words spelt out to her like a schoolfilly when she had a Phd in Ponyish or being harangued so embarrassingly in front of ponies she had to work with every day, she hid it unbelievably well.

“W-Wait… you didn’t even let me finish…” Applejack was used to the erratic mood swings of the agitated mayor by now, but this kind of impulsive throwing caution to the winds was unusual even for her. “We almost caught her in the act burnin’ down Fluttershy’s cottage, then she went an’ hid out in the Everfree where she practically blasted a Cyclops with her magic from here to Queendom come! She’s a menace that one I tell you what, and I fear that whatever we throw at her, it won’t be enough. That’s why I came runnin’ down here so late in the day; I believe the only way we can stop Twilight Sparkle and her accomplice Spike is to talk one-on-one to…”

“Spike? Who’s ‘Spike’?” The mayor seemingly hadn’t heard most of Twilight’s new litany of charges, homing in on that one name as if it was of the utmost interest.

“Spike? Why, that’s the little baby dragon who’s always followin’ Twilight around. In fact, me and my friends had a brief chat with him at Sugarcube Corner… very odd fellow to say the least. I guess that’s to be expected though, if you’re cohabitin’ with a pony in a fostered siblin’ relationship. I mean, I assume that’s the case; how else could a dragon and a unicorn be related…”

“Stop the presses! Stop the presses! The name of that dreadful creature who ruined my cherished flower was ‘Spike’! How could I have forgotten about him… maybe my memory is failing me after all… no, it must be his minuscule size which is making it difficult for me to recall him. No matter… I must proceed to catch up to Feather Stroke post haste so she can add these new offences and the evil reptile’s name to the paper. Really Applejack, why couldn’t you have just told me everything all at once, I wouldn’t have to go to the effort of chasing my assistant all over town. I’m not as young as you, you know…”

“I tried, I tried to… but you… you… gggrrr.” Applejack mercifully muted the strain of excessive profanities (like ‘darn it’ and ‘what the hay’) that were about to leave her lips due to the desperate silent pleading of Mayor Mare’s underlings around her. They’d seen this scenario unfold many a time before, and it never ended well… for them at least.

“Never mind… we can discuss your concerning mental constipation later. Right now, I have an airborne secretary to catch; I hope my hip doesn’t give way like last time. If you hear me shout out in pain, please come and pick me up. Anyway, away I go… please look after things while I’m gone. If you see Celestia, tell her I ‘stepped out for personal reasons’. And this indeed, is highly personal. Well, be seeing you all. My dandelion will be avenged!!”

So as Mayor Mare trundled off at a steady lick considering her allegedly advancing years and most of her indecisive entourage were unsure whether they needed to follow her or stay behind, Applejack was left completely lost regarding her next move.

I can’t wait here until Princess Celestia shows up, Twilight Sparkle might have conquered Ponyville by then and I’d never be able to live with myself! Typical royalty… always present for state occasions and expensive dinners but never around when you need them. Honestly, sometimes I think the working ponies of the world should rise up as one to run things. We couldn’t possibly do any worse than a dim bulb like Mayor Mare or an often absent… hello? What’s that strange chink of light coming from the sky over there…?

That was when she saw it. A thin yet intense sliver of a beam emerging from up high all the way to the ground just across Ponyville, notably standing out as it pierced the clouds compared to the dying embers of daylight which surrounded the general area.

Well, that’s a sight you don’t see every day. It’s a long shot alright, a complete stab in the ‘dark’ if you’d pardon the expression, but if there’s any chance it’s got something to do with… I’ve gotta take it. Well here goes nothing… or everything, if my efforts are in vain…

Leaving behind a whole load of mindless ponies either scratching their heads or trotting around in irregular circles until the reassuring presence of the mayor returned, Applejack unhesitatingly exited the building hoping the answer she seeked lay just over the horizon…

Or not. At least she can say she tried.

And if anypony was a tryer, that would be Applejack.

Author's Note

Well, here we are... finally. A new update to a story which, for various reasons, I haven't got around to adding to for a while, but one I felt obligated to return to as soon as possible simply because I enjoy writing it so gosh darn much! (sorry for the appalling language, Applejack)

Mayor Mare never had a feature episode as far as I know or much of a defined personality, so I thought I'd speculate here what life might be like for her behind the scenes. It might not chime with your expectations, but remember this is purely headcanon so please don't take it too seriously.

The lack of Darren or Daisy in this part is purely a means to an end to get the story into where I want it to be, it's definitely a decision I made on purpose and as the author I like to know what I'm doing... and if you don't think I do, I'm sure I'll find out for myself sooner or later.

Oh, and RIP to G5 and all that. Still, as long as this site and everything it represents still remains, that's all that matters, right? Thought so.

Anyway, here's to my current readers and (hopefully) many future ones. Bye for now.