Last Stop on the Mail Route

Anon

Today is the day that Rarity's sister is supposed to swing by; Sweat Ball? No, no way thats it.

Right now, I'm sat outside my house, under the awning. Picked up an old used bench from Applejack they had sitting around; almost paid me to take the old thing off their hands. Wasn't too bad on my back, if I used the wall of my house for support. I've got Swish Bish's little carving sat beside me, whittling away at the next request. Honestly, I considered opening a stall... but I don't think I've got the people skills (or pony skills) to try and sell shit. Save it for requests and such, since my current customer base was the local children. Not exactly a group known for flush pockets, but maybe word would get around.

I know Apple Bloom is one, Applejacks sister. I like the Apples, and try to swing by the orchards when I'm walking that way for a hello. They're a comforting reminder of home, and apparently they make some fucking mean cider. I keep forgetting these splashes of colors have shit like alcohol. Nowhere near Earths alcohol percentage, but I'm not terribly interested in drinking, beyond flavor. Not a fan of losing full control over my thoughts or movements.

Then there's the orange one... Scoots, I think. No clue who she was related to, but she idolizes the shit out of Rainbow Dash, and the last time she saw how Dash acted around me... man, I think that the gears in her head turning. Dashes cousin, maybe? Never seen the pipsqueak so contemplative, like her emotional maturity just spiked a level. Think she's got a thing with her wings, too, so I feel for a fellow cripple. Doesn't seem to keep her down, though--I've seen her blitz around Ponyville on that scooter.

Speaking of Dash, finally had a good conversation with her. She wanted to apologize, but apparently has some serious difficulty with any task that isn't stroking her ego. Seemed to mellow out a bit once she realized I really wasn't bothered by it, and we spent the afternoon chatting. Mostly about my leg, obviously, but that's progress.

Last one is Swash Buckler. Sweet little thing, and the one I'm waiting on; said she'd swing by after classes ended to grab it for me. Wouldn't call her timid, but she's probably the least when it comes to how... loud of a personality the other two have. Definitely took after her big sister in the caring department, though. While not as brazen as Apple Bloom, Bell was a smart one. Smartest of the lot, I'd bet.

Distantly, I can hear the bell ring, signaling the end of the schoolday for the children. Should be about the time that Swell Bell comes by.

Okay, I know I got that second half right. I'm just gonna call her Bell until I figure out the first half. These Ponies had some awkward names to try and remember, but I was getting some of them. (The rest, I just worked off of Nicknames, though nicknames were gonna happen even if I did remember their name. Some stuck, like Rares, for Rarity. Others didn't, like Buttspark for Twilight. Didn't stop me from trying, though. 'Sunbutt' hasn't corrected me yet, so that's something to unpack later.) Some of their names were pretty on the nose, which helped; apparently parents didn't really... 'Pick' a name? More just like they... knew? Probably whatever Magic that was in line with a butt tattoo showing up on their ass.

Putting my whittling knife down on the bench, I fish my binoculars out of my jacket pocket, squinting through them. Peeping down on the town was slowly becoming a hobby of mine, though I tried to avoid windows. Didn't need 'Peeping Tom' added to my reputation... Did Ponies have that kind of shit? Crime was almost nonexistent around here, at least around Ponyville, I heard from Twilight.

I slowly scan over the square, trying to find the school... my hilltop abode grants me some good sightlines, so it doesn't take long to find Buttflower (Seen her, never met her, and yeah, a lot of my nicknames involve 'Butt', their fault) ushering the Fillies and Foals outside. There's a few parents waiting, but the small-town community vibe thrives here, and a good chunk of them just run off around town, either to play or head home.

I scan the scattering kids for a few familiar colors, and the white, yellow and orange trouble-trio bunching up. Apparently finding your butt-picture was important enough that they called themselves Cutie-Mark Crusaders. The mental vision of the three Fillies in historical templar crusading armor amused me for long enough that I lost track of them.

Back to scanning the crowds.

Doesn't take me long to find one of them again, specifically Bell. She was approaching the long climb up to my hill, though she wasn't alone. Another Filly, one I didn't recognize, was walking alongside her as the two were chatting, flailing hooves and giggling. Too far to hear what they were talking about, and would be for a few more minutes. Blonde Mane with a Lavender coat, compared to Sweetie's White and Purple; both Unicorns, though.

The topic of magic... Earth had a pretty good grasp of it in a lot of media. A comically over-useful plot device that was as overpowered as the individual was capable of. Apparently, everything had magic, but Unicorns were the ones that floated shit with their horns. Twilight was always eager to show me any time I asked, and that helped me understand. Most Unicorns are specialized, or reasonably powered. The Unicorns I knew personally could teleport.

I've firmly recommended to Twilight that she never make my prosthetic alive again.

Now that they're getting closer, I tuck my Binoculars back into my pocket. I see Bell raise a hoof, waving at me; I return the wave back. The second Filly waves, apparently even more excited. I can only imagine what the kids say about me, though I doubt most of it is good.

"Mister Human!" I hear Bell shout, the pair kicking up to a trot as they cross the final stretch up towards my porch. I bet you she forgot my name, too.
"Hi Mister Muss!" The second Filly shouts.

Huh, wasn't expecting that.

"Hey, Bell. Brought a friend?" I ask, leaning forward against my knees as I greet the pair.

"Sure did! She's--" Bell starts, but pauses, looking around. The poor thing gets cut off by Scoots and Apple Bloom so much, I think it's second nature for her to expect it even when they aren't here. Finding nobody intends to, she lets out a little sigh of relief, before--
"I'm Dinky!" The lavender one pipes up, voice just as squeaky as the rest. Bell groans, face-hoofing. Dinky smiles widely, staring at me. "You met my mom!"

"Oh, Derpy's kid. I can see it, now." I mutter, leaning forward. Swap the purple for grey, horn for wings... Dad must've been a Unicorn, then. Dinky nods, still beaming excitement.

Bell steps forward, eyes already glued to the hand-sized figure beside me. I chuckle, picking it up and holding it out for her; a soft light-green glow covers it, and I watch as it floats out of my hand towards her. It was a carved figurine of Rarity in a rearing-back pose, mane flowing, on a small base. Her styled hair was interesting to try and transcribe onto the wood, but I think I got it pretty good.
"Think she'll like it?" I ask, looking expectantly. I won't lie--I'm really hoping the kid likes it.

She looks up from it, smiling wide. I'm promptly tackled in the midsection, her hooves wrapping around me as she hugs me tight. I can't help but laugh, returning the hug before patting her head, setting her back down.

"It's wonderful. How did you make it?" Bell asks once she's back on the ground, the little figure floating beside her. Mental fist pump.

I waggle my fingers with one hand, and hold up my whittling knife in the other.
"Piece of wood, knife, and time. Helps that I was able to get a pretty good mental image of Rarity while she was sizing me for clothes."

"Could I... maybe... ask for another?" She asks softly, that mischievous smile kids get when they're excited slowly spreading on her face.

"Sure. I've got to make like... another three Rainbow Dashes for Scoots, but I could probably do something for you after." I joke. Well, not actually a joke, but I still think its funny.

Bell nods excitedly, starting to turn.
"Okay! Thank you, Mister Hum-- Muss!" She shouts, starting to trot down the hill. "I've got to get home quick, but I'll bring some bits by for it! Bye Dinky!"

Dinky and I wave, and I look to Dinky as she turns back to face me. She's sat on her haunches a few feet from me, staring up at me, smiling. Didn't expect her to stick around, thought she'd roll with Bell.

"You want one, too? I don't charge anything for them." I ask. Even if its just for free goodies, I still appreciate the attention. Surprisingly, she shakes her head no, still staring at me.

"Offers always open." I respond, nodding. I lean back, picking up my in-progress piece (A little something for Nurse Redmane, don't worry about it) starting to shave off new segments.

A few moments pass, and I realize I slipped into the workflow. Woops, I glance up--

Oh, still there, smiling. Uh...

"...You don't have to sit on the ground, you know." I offer, patting beside myself on the bench. I was going to assume she might be shy, but the moment I offer, she hops right up, settling in right beside me. Alright.

Now she's watching me work. Curious little thing. She's even humming, though I've no clue what.

"Your mom not expecting you?" I ask, another of many flakes of wood floating to the ground beneath me. Had a little pile going between my feet.

"Nope. Mom doesn't get home until late." She responds, still watching my hands work. I hold the knife and the figure with one hand, poking her on the nose with my finger with my free hand. She recoils, blinking a few times before looking up at me, tilting her head.

"She cool with you hanging out with me? Stranger danger, that kind of thing?" I ask, but she looks down to think for a moment. Big thoughts incoming, judging by how long she's thinking.

"... I wanted to say thank you." She finally speaks, looking back up to me. The smile isn't as wide, but its just as heartfelt. I raise an eyebrow.

"Sure? I mean, it's a bench."

"No, not that. About my Mom."

"...Not following."

She shuffles in place until she's sat facing me, tail swishing around.
"Mommy was doing her fake smile around the house for, like... a whole week. She doesn't think I know, but I know. She doesn't like looking sad in front of me." She starts.

"Oh, that's..." I start to mutter, but she keeps going.

"A few days ago, she looked really, really sad. I heard her crying in her room. But, the next day, she was smiling! Real smiling! I asked her about it--well, not about the sad-not-smile but just the real-smile, and she told me about you!" She squeaks, inching closer.

"Oh...Yeah?"
Words aren't exactly flowing right now. Wasn't really expecting this. Thankfully, she's not looking at me to respond just yet, and she keeps going.

"You didn't say the mean things other Ponies say about her, you even gave her tea, and helped her with her packages! She said you gave really nice hugs! Can I have one?" She squeaks again, my heart clenching from how fucking cute this kid was.

I practically sputter, which she takes as affirmation, and wraps her hooves around me. Or, as much as she can, anyway.
I'm just staring forward, processing this, my hand eventually finding its way to pat her on the back. She looks straight up at me, face half-mushed and words muffled as she's pressed against me.

"Thank you, Mister Muss. I like when my mom smiles. Real-smiles. And you make her do it! So I like you."

This is coercion of the highest fucking degree. It should be illegal for these things to be this fucking cute.

She lets go of me, scooting back to her original spot.

"That's... very sweet of you, Dinky. I like--" I start saying, before realizing I didn't give myself enough time to process thoughts into words. Uh, fuck no. Don't say you like a lone child you just met. Abort. Say you like literally anything else.

"--your mom."

Nailed it. Fucking moron. Damage control.

"Too. She's, uh, really nice." I add at the end. Internal fist-pump. Fucking smooth, that's why you're the best.

Dinky practically beams, her smile gets so wide.
"You do!? I'll tell her! That'll make her really, really real-smile! She couldn't stop talking about you last night!"

Oh, fuck.

Dinky leaps from the bench, already trotting home.
"Bye Mister Muss!" She pauses, waving with a hoof, before bolting off. I doubt if I had two good legs, I'd catch her, so I don't even consider it with one, just waving.

"Seeya 'round. Dinkster."

I sit in silence for a few minutes, processing that, before returning to my whittling. That's gonna have repercussions, but that's a problem for later.