and what do i do with this bug looking thing

Anon sits on his couch, arms crossed in a huff. Barfy is on his lap, blinking slower than ever. He's trapped in his own abode, forced to face consequences. A horrid time.

In front of him in a semi-circle sat the local goody-good squad.

Twilight, bags under her eyes from spending an entire day re-organizing her library. They're in a tense standoff, where Twilight wants to ban him from the library, but if she does, he'll refuse to turn in the books he'd borrowed. Worse yet -- they were from a rather 'private' collection, putting Twilight in a harsh, blackmailed bind.

Applejack, mostly just there to keep the others from dogpiling on Anon. Since he messes with her the least, their relationship is the least damaged. That, and Barfy actually helped Apple Bloom following one of their attempts to get a 'Cutie Mark', so that might be the only friendly face Anon had in the crowd, right now. And it didn't look very friendly. More tired.

Fluttershy, quietly occupying a spot beside the others, glancing around from under her mane. Before she got here, Anon realized they were up to something; they don't gather outside his house unless they did something wrong. Hopping out the window, he intercepted her and used what witnessed saw the other day, involving Discord and some awkward posing, to blackmail her silence. She was dangerous in these confrontations, and he wasn't gonna let her get that authority-voice thing going.

Rarity, twice the distance from Anon than the others, because she refuses to go anywhere near Barfy. She watches the bug suspiciously from behind an umbrella angled towards the volatile vomiter.

Rainbow Dash, throwing him dirty looks for embarrassing her yesterday when she tried to catch him. She's been held back from jumping him and Barfy several times now, and is on her last strike. They haven't even gotten to the talking phase yet.

And Pinkie, who could barely sit still. Having been denied her 'Welcome to Ponyville Barfy The Invading Changeling' party, she was like a fidgeting time-bomb, wanting to make a very, very good friend out of Barfy. Everyone unanimously agreed that was a terrible idea.

"...Anon." Twilight starts, clearing her throat.

"I didn't do it." He reflexively covers. "Boom, saved it."

"What? No! You and Barfy are terrorizing this town!" Twilight shouts, slamming a hoof down.

"Are not." Anon refutes concisely, crossing his arms and pouting.

"Darling, I should inform you I did bring the crossbow -- if that may play into your willingness." Rarity adds, distantly, from across the room, shielded by umbrella fortification.

Anon uncrosses his arms, sits up -- and pokes Barfy into sitting up proper as well.
"Yep, listening."

Dash sneers at him, but he sticks his tongue out at her. She scowls, but AppleJack pats her back.
"Easy, Dash. Let Twi speak 't him."

Dash stews, but relents, crossing her hooves while a scowl settles in.

"Anon. We need to discuss... Barfy." Twilight starts, taking a calming breath. "You've chased Ponies around Ponyville with her, only a week after the Canterlot attack."

"Hey -- hang on, I wasn't chasing anybody! I was imparting my immense knowledge of Fighter Craft to Barfy through demonstration, showcasing the advantages of the --" Anon points out, but is cut off.

"F-22's air dominance, how the F-35 is as comparable but as a utility plane -- yes, Anon. I don't know what any of that means, just like how I don't understand why the pool is closed, or why nobody would buy your Ponycoin. I can guess, but I'm not going to, because you ran around town making a mess of everything!" Twilight shouts, frustrated.

"What?! I didn't make a mess of anything! Barfy behaved the whole time! Not a single yuck-up, and I was flinging her around! Right Barfy?" Anon refutes, poking the bug.

All eyes shift uncomfortably to the Bug for its response. It hacks softly, smacking its lips.

"...Right. Anyway -- Dash made all the mess!" Anon flings an accusatory finger, as Dash snaps at it, teeth clacking. Anon gasps, yanking his finger away dramatically, huffing.

"He's kinda got you on that one, Twi." Applejack relents, surprisingly. Several eyes float to Applejack, shocked.

"Applejack! Don't take his side in this! We're supposed to be handling the Changeling issue!" Twilight argues, twisting to look at the orange pony.

"Twi, it's a Changeling that can't change, and it certainly ain't no threat t' anyone. If it was, Anon'd be done for already." Applejack explains, shockingly demeaning to poor Anons pride.

"Excuse you, I find myself be to a most notable pain in the ass to do in." Anon refutes, crossing his arms.

He is ignored.

"Honestly, other than helpin' you make up for th' mess it made in th' library, I ain't seein' an issue. If it wants t' slime all over his house, let it. Just 'stablish some ground rules, 'stead of tryna get rid of it. You know Anons still upset with y' for what y' did to his last pet." Applejack sighs.

A single tear runs down Anons cheek as he fondly remembers the Timberwolf he'd found. A collective gaze floats to the single stick sitting mantled on the wall, and Twilight sighs.

"...Alright. Fine. Anon, we're going to establish Rules. Rules that you will follow. If you break them, Barfy is gone, understand? Things are tense enough around here as it is." Twilight harshly warns, pointing a hoof at him. Anon bites at it, his teeth clacking, Twilight gasping and yanking her hoof back.

"Shove it, Sparkbutt. You're just pissy this is a situation your manic brain doesn't have control over, hooves all dug into it. Barfy is a diplomatic ambassador for the Changeling people, here to prove that not all Changelings are bad." Anon huffs, reaching behind the couch for something.

Both Twilight and Dash look like they're about ready to just jump him and take the damn bug -- until he pulls a stamped parchment out, handing it to Twilight.

Ready for it to be another elaborate, dumb Anon joke, she cautiously takes it with her magic, floating it in front of her face.

It's a letter, from Celestia.

Actually, it's a document.

A Certified, Notarized, signed by the Princess of the Sun Document stating that Barfy is a Protected Entity within the bounds of Equestria, living as a symbiotic caretaker to the critically endangered and mentally disabled species 'Anony Moos'. For as long as it holds this position, the position title remains 'Changeling Ambassador', and is granted appropriate rights. This can only to be changed under the conditions when the Changelings form a recognized nation and put forth their own, to which this position will enter review.

Twilights jaw nearly hits the floor, trembling.

"Easy, Twi... Don't do anythin' rash..." Applejack coaxes, though, wisely, while starting to back away.

Princess Celestia is enjoying a calm morning, sipping tea and enjoying a slice of cake. A little more than she should be having -- but she wanted to treat herself. She felt quite clever coming up with that little document, skirting the concerns of all related groups.

She sips quietly, content.

Poof.

A letter appears in front of her, in a little puff of green flame. Must be Twilight. But her Friendship report wasn't due for --

Poof.

Oh, another. Odd.

Poof.

Celestia blinks a few times, the newest scroll now sat in her tea. That's not sanitary.

Poof. Poof. Poof.

Uh oh.

PoofPoofPoofPoofPoofPoofPoofPoofPoofPoofPoofPoof--